July 16, 2020
Boys of Summer in Poolside Blues
How to Tell Your Boo is Over You Biblical Year Needs Parabolic Wisdom Liberal Guilt, Self-Hate & Rabid Online Shaming
I take Pride in helping everyone.
Jesse Watts, RealtorÂŽ
M: 678-237-5310 | O: 404-604-3100 | firstname.lastname@example.org jessewatts.kw.com | c @jessewattsrealtor Licensed in Georgia. Keller Williams Realty, Inc. is a real estate franchise company. Each Keller Williams office is independently owned and operated. Keller Williams Realty, Inc. is an Equal Opportunity Employer and supports the Fair Housing Act.
SUMMER CAME and the crises of 2020 continued, so our beach vacation fantasies are still hampered and tampered by our constant companion, coronavirus. Rather than waterworks, this issue of Q ATLus makes a splash and
opts for optimism and options. We may not land on the sands of distant shores, but we can still work looks by the pool. Our 2020 swimsuit issue finds gay guys turning their covid blues into vivid hues. In Q Voices, boys of summer are joined by our publisher, who tells himself fables and parables to get his inner optimist through the ordeals of the day. Our editor joins him with some sage advice for judging others too harshly in Q Advice. In the news-you-can-use department, we find gay sexual harassment claims at two stalwart Atlanta institutions in Q News, and 10 Q Things sees signs of an exit strategy from rocky relationships. Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll also find our Q Map and Q Events for downtime distractions. Look for fresh online content at theQatl.com, and find our editor at mike@theQatl.com.
RICHARD CHERSKOV PUBLISHER & SALES RICHARD@THEQATL.COM 404-917-9678 JOHN NAIL ART DIRECTOR JOHN@THEQATL.COM
MIKE FLEMING EDITOR MIKE@THEQATL.COM RIVENDELL MEDIA NATIONAL ADVERTISING SALES@RIVENDELLMEDIA.COM 212-242-6863 theQatl.com 5
INSIDE THIS ISSUE VOLUME 3 ISSUE 2 2
J U LY 1 6 , 2 0 2 0
BOO & YOU
10 signs relationships are ending
Got the Blues
Poolside looks for summer
Ancient parable for Modern Era Q NEWS
13 Q Voices...........................8 10 Q Things....................10 Q News..........................13 Q Map...........................24 Q Advice....................... 30 6 theQatl.com
Morehouse and Dunwoody under fire
30 Q EVENTS
Letâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Do This Happening online and in-person
A bedtime story to get my inner Pollyanna through 2020 AMONG OTHER THINGS, I’M OFTEN described as absurdly optimistic. Yet as we enter the second or third half of 2020, it’s increasingly difficult to see the bright side, even through my wildly rainbow-colored glasses.
My dad passing away… being able to be home to spend his last months with him. Uncomfortable conversations about race, police brutality, and LGBTQ+ rights… shining a light shined on who our allies are and where we need to be. Going stir crazy … having more time to read, reflect and take care of myself. Unprecedented work challenges… leading to different opportunities. Losing the instant-gratification of restaurants… losing 22 pounds eating fresh meals at home.
Politics crazier than the baseBut my inner-Pollyanna is still line… driving the polls to stop here. She’s just under lockthis madness in November. down because she’s fragile. I Fingers crossed. tell her the old parable about Missing travel… organizing the Chinese Farmer to assuage photos and memories and planher fears. The tale that pops ning an ultimate getaway. up a lot in shows and movies, No going out for drinks with RICHARD often as a teaching moment by friends… sitting on the porch CH ERSKOV some horse-high boomer. Trite and having great conversations. or not, it really might offer The stress of staying safe while out getting another way to look at this crazy year. what we need… discovering we don’t always As the fable goes, a farmer’s horse ran away. need it, store pick-ups, and pausing a mo“Most unfortunate,” neighbors said. The ment before hitting “purchase” on Amazon. farmer said, “Maybe.” The horse returned the Missing movie theaters… introducing next day and brought back seven wild horses, favorite films to my niece on the couch and and now the community proclaimed, “What a making home-made popcorn. great turn of events. Aren’t you lucky?” Again The constant pressure to be social and “doing the farmer replied, “Maybe.” something”… appreciating the calm and the After his son broke his leg trying to tame one of the wild horses, the people cried, “So awful!” (Like Trump tweeted, “Bad! Terrible! Sad!”) The farmer only said “Maybe.” Then the military came to draft his son. They passed him over because of his broken leg. And on it goes. Are events inherently good or bad? Maybe. Probably. The parable suggests it’s a bit more complicated than that. Here are some of my “bad” things about 2020 and my attempt to find the “And then...” 8 theQatl.com
reminder that we don’t need to fill every minute of every day. The sadness of COVID-19 devastating close friends and family… having the time to properly grieve and give support to those who need it. The family cat ran away… I’m still working on that one, but maybe one day it could be a famous parable.
Richard Cherskov is an entrepreuer in Atlanta and publisher of Q Atlus. Reach him via richard@theQatl.com.
10 THINGS You feel lonely even when they are there. They stop leaving their stuff at your place.
10 SIGNS YOUR BOO IS OVER YOU They change your name to ‘Felicia’ in their phone.
They’re already gone. Here’s how you can tell. Your conversations with the dog are longer than the ones with them.
Friends stop inviting you out as a couple, because they’d prefer to chew glass than be around you together. 10 theQatl.com
Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re too busy with work to hang, but not too busy to stop at the bar with friends.
The mere thought of their arrival makes you want to bolt.
They suggest seeing other people, and oh yeah hey by the way, they already have a head start.
They stop texting you back.
They start buying their own drinks without asking if you want one. theQatl.com 11
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Dunwoody cop says lieutenant swapped nudes in pattern of same-sex offenses A FORMER DUNWOODY police officer filed a lawsuit on July 7 alleging that a male ex-lieutenant on the force asked for nude photographs from at least three male officers, and received nudes in return from at least one for fear of retaliation.
that there was a “quid pro quo” for opportunities on the job or retaliatory threats. The lawsuit says the plaintiff has proof there was.
The book-length report also provided screenshots of texts and nude photos between Espinoza and three officers. One of those documents Espinoza surreptiFidel Espinoza quit his job in tiously snapping photo of an offiFormer Dunwoody Police May after the allegations came to Lt. Fidel Espinoza cer’s genitals at a urinal. He texted light, and the suit was filed after the officer the photo later. That an internal investigation revealed some merit officer is not part of the current lawsuit, but he to the claims as well as similar accusations has obtained a lawyer, according to the AJC. from other uniformed officers. The current lawsuit names the City of The investigation by Dunwoody Police Chief Billy Grogan confirmed the nudes, according to the AJC. But the chief found no evidence
Dunwoody, the police department, the mayor, Grogan and Espinoza. It seeks $500,000 in damages.
Morehouse students say school ignored same-sex harassment
“For Plaintiffs, Morehouse College has become a sexually hostile environment where their perpetrators, continued to remain on campus without any limitations or restrictions after the Plaintiff Michael Key Press repeated complaints Photo via AJC and attempts to exercise their victim’s rights under Title IX and Defendant Morehouse’s own policies,” the attorneys, Tiffany M. Simmons and Corey Martin, wrote in their lawsuit complaint.
MOREHOUSE COLLEGE IGNORED student complaints of multiple sexual advances and innuendos by school officials, a new lawsuit by three students at the all-male college alleges. The lawsuit filed on July 6 says a list of past and present administrators were aware of the complaints but did nothing until one of the students, Michael Key, posted videos about his claims on Twitter, according to a report in the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. Fulton Superior Court documents do not name the other two plaintiffs, according to the paper, but all three say Morehouse officials used crude language, urged the students to “come out” as gay, and in one incident, kissed the student’s stomach and tried to remove his pants and underwear.
Title IX prohibits discrimination and harassment in schools. Morehouse declined comment to the AJC other than “student safety is of utmost importance to us.” For more news of local LGBTQ interest, visit Project Q Atlanta at theQatl.com. theQatl.com 13
Summeâ&#x20AC;&#x2030; 14 theQatl.com
â&#x20AC;&#x2030; r Blues 2020 swimsuit fantasies are homebound, but poolside blues never looked so good
SUMMER BLUES continued
SUMMER BLUES continued
SUMMER BLUES continued
The Best LGBTQ Things to Do in Atlanta This Week THURSDAY, JULY 16 Cabana Fever DJ Deanne does #TGIT online with Fuego Productions. Miss Rona has you under house arrest, but
FRIDAY, JULY 17 Happy Hour + Queer Bait Mary’s sells entry in limited shifts, and continues its virtual parties online for those staying home. Get in on early and late events @ Mary’s & Twitch.tv, 6 p.m. marysatlanta.com
these beats are a whole mood every Thursgay @ twitch.tv/djdeanne Transmasculine Stories for Young People Lexie Bean’s The Ship We Built, and Tobly McSmith’s Stay Gold are discussed with the authors, hosted by the queer feminists of Charis @ Crowdcast, 7:30 p.m. charisbooksandmore.com
THURSDAY & SATURDAY, JULY 16, 18
SATURDAY, JULY 18 DJ Nina Flowers The RPDR finalist and gay circuit DJ hits town for a Xion afterhours set in the wee hours of Sunday morning @ BJ Roosters, 3 a.m. – 7 a.m. facebook.com/xionatlanta
EVERY WEEK Good Judy Ellasaurus Rex and Brigitte Bidet play off each other and their special guests on topics of the day in this new podcast perfect for your 2020 isolation exercises @ Your Streaming Service, new each week.
ALL MONTH Visible: Out on Television is the five-part history of LGBTQ representation on television that you don’t want to miss, now on Apple TV+. The heartwarming movie A Kid Like Jake is back, this time on Hulu through the end of July. Atlanta United Gay pro soccer fans rejoice as MLS returns to televised play. On Thursday, ATL UTD plays Cincinnati. On Saturday the 18th, it’s Columbus. Both 8 p.m. on screens @ Woofs. Also catch Saturday’s game with All Stripes @ Coda on Peachtree. woofsatlanta.com, facebook.com/allstripesatl 24 theQatl.com
PALS supports people in Atlanta who are elderly or who are living with or disabled due to a critical illness. We provide pet food and basic veterinary care for the pets of our clients, which enables them to keep their pets. You can support PALS by:
• Attending our monthly Drag •
Queen Bingo fundraisers. Making PALS the beneficiary. of your Amazon Smile, Kroger Plus or Chewy.com accounts. Making a donation online. To learn more about PALS or to donate visit:
on tA ve .N E dm Pi e
11th St. NE
10th St. NE
Dr. N E
14th St. NE
12th St. NE
West Peachtree St. NE
t. N eS tre
Spring St. NW
Q Atlus Map
Virginia Ave. NE
2 9th St. NE
Ponce De Leon Ave. NE
Restaurants North Ave. NW
North Ave. NW
1. Amsterdam Cafe 502 Amsterdam Ave. NE
8. Flex 76 4th St NW
2. Blakes on the Park 227 10th St. NE
9. Henry’s Midtown Tavern 132 10th St NE
Mary’s 1287 Glenwood Ave SE
10. Joe’s on Juniper Ralph McGill Blvd. NE 1049 Juniper St NE
Sister Louisa’s 466 Edgewood Ave SE
4. Friends on Ponce 736 Ponce De Leon Ave NE 5. My Sister’s Room 84 12th St
11. Zocalo Mexican Kitchen & Cantina 187 10th St NE Highland Ave. NE
6. X Midtown 990 Piedmont Ave. NE
12. Barking Leather After Dark 306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE (inside Eagle)
7. Atlanta Eagle 306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE
13. Urban Body Fitness 500 Amsterdam Ave NE
Future (Opens July 3) 50 Lower Alabama St SW, Suite 180 Glen Iris Dr. NE
3. Bulldogs Bar 893 Peachtree St NE
The T 465 Boulevard SE Swinging Richards 1400 Northside Dr NW Lips Drag Show Palace 3011 Buford Highway NE Lost ’n Found Youth Thift Store 2585 Chantilly Dr NE
Ponce De Leon Pl. NE
St. Charles Ave.
Ponce De Leon Pl. NE
r. NE roe D Mon
Charles Allen Dr. NE
Spring St. NW
3 Juniper St. NE
West Peachtree St. NE
8th St. NE
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Leno x Rd .
Manchester Rd. NE
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Piedmont Ave. NE
d. N eR
Bars Restaurants Clubs Retail/Services
Cheshire Bridge Road 5. The Heretic 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
9. Gravity Fitness 2201 Faulkner Rd NE
2. Tripp’s Bar 1931 Piedmont Circle NE
6. Las Margaritas 1842 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
10. Southern Nights 2205 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
3. Woof’s Sports Bar 494 Plasters Ave NE
7. Roxx Tavern 1824 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
11. Tokyo Valentino (Cheshire Bridge) 1739 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
4. BJ Rooster’s 2043 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
8. 2Qute Hair Salon 1927 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
4. Oscar’s 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
tA ve .N E on ed m
5. Barking Leather 1510 Piedmont Ave NE 6. Boy Next Door 1447 Piedmont Ave NE
1. Felix’s on the Square 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
3. Midtown Moon 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
Ansley Park 2. The Hideaway 1544 Piedmont Ave NE
Morningside Dr. NE
1. Sequel Bar 1086 Alco St. NE
Bars Restaurants Clubs Retail/Services
7. Brushstrokes 1510 Piedmont Ave NE 8. Equilibrium Fitness 1529 Piedmont Ave NE
Q Atlus Map Directory The businesses on the preceding pages are integral parts of Atlanta’s LGBTQ landscape. Those listed in boxes are consistent Q partners and community allies. BARS, CLUBS & RESTAURANTS Amsterdam Cafe 502 Amsterdam Ave. NE Atlanta Eagle 306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE BJ Roosters 2043 Cheshire Bridge Road NE Blakes on the Park 227 10th St. NE Bulldogs Bar 893 Peachtree St NE Felix’s on the Square 1510 Piedmont Ave NE Friends on Ponce 736 Ponce De Leon Ave NE Future 50 Lower Alabama St SW, Suite 180 Henry’s Midtown Tavern 132 10th St NE The Heretic 2069 Cheshire Bridge Road NE The Hideaway 1544 Piedmont Ave NE Joe’s on Juniper 1049 Juniper St NE Las Margaritas 1842 Cheshire Bridge Road NE Lips Drag Show Palace 3011 Buford Highway NE Mama’s Cocina 1958 Piedmont Road NE Mary’s 1287 Glenwood Ave SE Midtown Moon 1510 Piedmont Ave NE My Sister’s Room 84 12th St Oscar’s 1510 Piedmont Ave NE
Roxx Tavern 1824 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
Sequel Bar 1086 Alco St. NE Sister Louisa’s 466 Edgewood Ave SE Swinging Richards 1400 Northside Dr NW The T 465 Boulevard SE Tripp’s Bar 1931 Piedmont Circle NE Woof’s Sports Bar 494 Plasters Ave NE X Midtown 990 Piedmont Ave. NE Zocalo Mexican Kitchen & Cantina 187 10th St NE
RETAIL & SERVICES 2Qute Hair Salon 1927 Cheshire Bridge Road NE Barking Leather 1510 Piedmont Ave NE Barking Leather After Dark 306 Ponce De Leon Ave NE (inside Atlanta Eagle) Boy Next Door 1447 Piedmont Ave NE Brushstrokes 1510 Piedmont Ave NE Equilibrium Fitness 1529 Piedmont Ave NE Lost ’n Found Youth Thrift Store 2585 Chantilly Dr NE Urban Body Fitness 500 Amsterdam Ave NE
ADULT Flex 76 4th St NW Southern Nights 2205 Cheshire Bridge Road NE Starship Galaxy/Starship Novelties 2273 Cheshire Bridge Road NE Tokyo Valentino 1739 Cheshire Bridge Road NE
My partner and I adopted a newborn over the holidays, and I am already mortified over a situation that I fear I created.
Moments after a black colleague told me that babies love him, my two-month old broke into screams and tears when he leaned over her crib. It’s the first time she’s seen a black person, and even though I made an excuse about her being tired, the truth couldn’t have been more obvious that she was afraid of his dark skin. I’m even more worried because my baby’s birth parents are Asian. As white mothers, I fear we’ve made a mistake by not exposing her to more folx of color before now. How should I follow up with the colleague, and what should I do about my racist baby? Dear White People: Too many Caucasian queers are so focused on intersectionality in society that we forget to get our own house in order. While it is outdated to ask you to be “color blind,” it’s also wrong to be so “color aware” that you come off as awkwardly as any racist. A two-month old cried when a stranger stuck his head in her crib. It is a total non-event — except for your reaction. At that age, everyone she sees brings new stimuli. Apart from lining up people of different races to file past her crib on a daily basis, you’ve exposed her to various people as they cross your path over the last couple of months — you know, like real life is. Now, if you anticipate that having your infant around only white people is going to be an actual problem rather than an invented one, please do diversify your circles. It might do you as much (or more) good as your daughter. You’re not even a little bit ready to address this with your colleague. He understands it better than you do, and catching you up is not his job. Let this one go, and concentrate on staying out of your own way. 30 theQatl.com
There is this guy in my friend group who won’t let anyone say anything bad — ever.
One friend was talking about how his ex-boyfriend hurt him. This guy interrupted to say, “but we don’t talk bad about our exes.” When I was asked my opinion on a local queer play that was so bad it sent people bailing at intermission, this person said, “but we keep our opinions to ourselves and support all queer arts.” When confronted, he says that bullying suffered by disenfranchised people leaves negativity unacceptable in all forms. I don’t even know where to begin. Dear Peppy Patty: Policing and shaming each other have become hallmarks of liberal existence. Such infighting and zero tolerance divides us against our enemies. Your acquaintance is hurting over discrimination and inequality, but passing judgments about your behavior misdirects his emotions. Acting like negativity isn’t there doesn’t make it go away, and it’s rude to shut people down. Even when we understand him, don’t let his issues become your problem. Conflict avoidance on his part does not create “should” on your part. Grownups get to pick their battles and can choose whether to engage each other about them. Give zero more fucks about his judgments, and give him an earful if he persists. Send your burning Qs to mike@theQatl.com. ILLUSTRATION BY BRAD GIBSON