AudriAdams
Aweman!WhyamI alwaysforcedtoanswer thehardestquestions?I thinkbothoftheselovely professionalshavea goodchanceatwinning, butarguablythestreet rat.Now,Mr.Millerdoes havemorestreetfighting experience,buthow manytimeshashereally putthemtouse? Thestreetratdefinitely getsmoreroundsinby 5amthanKenny.
Well,I’mmoreworried aboutthecontinuous fightfortheMooMoos andOinkOinks,butI guessIcanweighin. Sincemyvaluestellme wecan’tharmanimals,I doreallyhopethatcity streetratwins.Now, whetheritstartsthe blackplagueagainand weallendupdying,who knows,solongas nothinghappenstothat preciousdiseaseinfested rat.
Whowouldwin inafight:former editorKenny Miller,oraNYC streetrat?
KennyMiller
Whydoeseveryonethink Iwouldlosetoastreet rat?Iguesstheydohave apoint-Iwouldneverlay myhandsonawoman.
Emptyspacefillerprovided by…
KateVotaw
NewOfficialBeveragesforthe49StatesandOne
IllegallyOccupiedTerritoryofAmerica(pt.1)
ThemajorityoftheUnitedStates(excludingHawaii)havechosen“Milk”astheir officialstatebeverageofchoiceaccordingtostatesymbolsusa.org,andIfindthat appallingandunacceptable.Sowewillbechoosingnewdrinksforthem.And we’llbetalkingabouttheotherstatescauseIdidtheresearch.
Alabama-Alabamagetstokeeptheirsbecausetheychoseanalcohol. ConecuhRidgeAlabamanWhiskey.Isitgood?IDK,betterthanchoosing milk.
Alaska-DUCKFARTSISTHENAMEOFTHISDRINKANDTHAT’S HILARIOUS!ThisisanalcoholicdrinkmadewithBailey’s,Kahlua,andRoyal CrownWhiskey.Definitelytrysome,thissoundslikeagooddrinktbh.Please offerittoyourfriendsthiswayaswell.
Arizona-Lemonadeisthecurrentofficialdrink,sothat’sfineIguess.Again notmilk.
Arkansas-THESTATEBEVERAGEISMILK!TIMETOCHANGEIT! Lookingattheirotherstatesymbols,Iamgoingtogivethemricewineastheir statebeverage.Theycanchoosewhichflavorofricewinethough.
California-Theirstatedrinkiswine,becauseofthevineyardsofNapa Valley.Goodenough.
Colorado-Anotheralcoholicdrink-TheSnowball!Youcangoogletherecipe forthisone,asthereareapparently,severalvariations.
Connecticut-MoscowMule.Again,canstay.
Delaware-MILK!!CASTITOUT!NewdrinkisStrawberryDaiquiri,because alcoholandfruitareyummy,andtheirstatefruitisthestrawberry.
Florida-Floridaisonthinfuckingicebecausethestatedrinkisorangejuice.It’s superboringbutIGUESSSINCEIT’SUNIQUEANDNOTMILKITCANSTAY.
Georgia-I’msurprisedthisstatedidn’tchoosemilkastheirstatebeverage,buteven moresurprisedthatit’snotthePeachBellini,giventhatthey’rethepeachstate.Their statedrinkistheScarletO’Haracocktail,whichismadewithcranberryjuice,a squeezeoflime,andSouthernComfort.
Hawaii-ThoughnottechnicallyastateduetotheUnitedStateslonghistoryof occupyingitillegally,Hawaiigetsincluded.Theirstatedrink,accordingtotheir statelegislature,iscalled‘awa’.ItismadefromtherootsofaHawaiiancanoeplant ofthesamename,andseemstobesimilartoalcoholinthatitgivesapsychoactive relaxant.Neat!
Idaho-TwosourcessayCanadianWhiskeyisIdaho’schosenstatebeverage,so we’llgowiththat.
Illinois-JamesonIrishWhiskey.
Indiana-IndianaclaimedWATERastheirstatebeveragebutTHEACTUAL DEFINITIONOFABEVERAGEISADRINKOTHERTHANWATER!!Sotheyalso getanewdrink-Indianagetstohaveitsstatedrinkbeeggyolksthathavebeenbeat inaglass,likeinRocky.FuckyouIndiana.
Iowa-Apparentlyafrozenmargarita,specificallyafrozenbluewatermargaritais thestatedrink.Sothat’scool.
Kansas-TheHorsefeathercontainsryewhiskey,ginger,lemonjuice,andbitters.
Kentucky-WhythefuckdidKentuckychoosemilk?Noidea.Itevenhasthe BourbonTrail!SoitgetsBourbon,whichtasteslikeRedHots.
Louisiana-ALSOMILKWTF!AnywaythenewdrinkistheSazerac,whichis anotheralcoholicbeverageandwascreatedinNewOrleans.
Maine-TheirstatedrinkisasoftdrinkcalleMoxie.Apparentlyit’sarootbeerbut theaftertasteisbitter.Coolbeans,Maine.
Maryland-NOMOREMILK!TheirnewdrinkisCreamSodabecauseIsaidso.
Massachusetts-CranberryJuice.
Igottiredofwritingthissoexpectapart2lol
“DearBrainStew,
I’mhavingsometroubleadjustingtocollegestill.Anyadvice?”
-worriedtransferstudent
Wehaven’tevenadjustedourselves,soweaskedtworandom studentsintheNosh,sohere,Ihopethishelps.
“Justcutyourlossesandadmityoushouldneverhavetransferredto CUMSL.Ifyouaren’tastraight,white,cisgenderedmanfromsome littlefaroffsmalltowninMissouri,thenthisisn’ttheschoolforyou. Asamatteroffact,thiswholeeducationthingprobablyisn’tgoingto berightforyouifyoudon’tfitintothatcriteria.”
-Awomanwhostillchoosestodateastraight,white,cisgenderman
“Haveyoutriedtalkingtoyourparents?Ifyou’rehavingsome issuesadjustingyoucanalwaysseeifyourparentsarewilling togiveyouasmallsumofhalfamilliondollarssothatyoucan spendmoretimef@ckingbitchesandgettingmoney.While yourparentsareatit,justhavetheslideChancellorSobolika smalllittleamountsothatyoucangraduateearlywiththat businessdegreewithnorealeffort.Imeanhey,Istarted adjustingfinewhenmyparentsdidthatandwhenmy businessclassesstoppedplayingDoratheExplorerandgave ussomethingalittlebitmorechallenging-CoCoMelon.”
-Localbusinessstudent
AudriissendingthismessageinsteadofDanbecauseDan
says…
Ithinkyou'resecretlyamemberoftheReptilianElitesthat areobviouslytryingtooverthrowallofUMSLandestablish itaspartoftheirmuseum(evidencebeingtherenovations takingplaceatVilla).Thenameofthemuseumis"The MortalRepository"andthisparticularsectionwillbecalled "ALookIntotheStudentHuman'sWorld".Danfoundthe blueprintstothisnewattractionandtriedtohelpyou(he definitelydidn'ttrytostopyou).Youlethimforawhile,but thenrealizedhewouldbealiabilityduetohisbeard(Idid extensiveresearchandfoundthatreptilianshatebeardsdue tothetextureoftheirskin).Youmadethedecisiontoerase Dan'smemorybeforetheotherReptiliansfoundoutbut wentalittleoverboardandnowit'stakinghimsometimeto recover.Yousentoutthepre-registrationemailsoyoucould useitasanexcuse.Ifpre-registrationhasstarted,thenDan wouldbebusymeetingwithotherstudentstogettheir schedulessetupfortheSpringandwouldhavelittletimeto preparetheemail.It'sthePERFECTcover-up.IthinkIhitthe nailontheheadwiththisone.Youcantrytoerasemy memorybutI'vealreadyfiguredouthowtheReptilian's technologyworksand,sinceIamwellinformedinthefield ofchemistry,Ihavedevelopedandtakenaserumto automaticallyreversetheeffects.
BrainStewsays… Thiswasprettygood!ButeveryoneknowsthatRobWilson isthelizard-man,notAudri.ReadthebackissuesofBS, please,formoreinformation.
AbbyWall
AudriissendingthisemailwhileDanwaitsforhisbailto post.HegotwaaaaytoorowdyathislocalNattyBdivebar thisweekend.Tomakealongstoryshort,hetookhisown “showmethatbutthole”hattooseriously,andscarredmany abarpatronsforlife.JustanotherregularSundayafternoon forDan,basically.
JuliaGreen
Andthewinneris…Announcingtheresultsoflastweek’s“Whyis AudrisendingthisemailinsteadofDan?”contest! Doyoureadyourdamnemails?No?Bah!Youareaslk;jfasdfs,asdlfkjsdfy,asdfsdfsdhead.Readthese eachMonday.Also,enterthecontests!OnOctober3,theweeklycollegeemail,forthefirsttimesince HonorsbecameathingatUMSLin1947,wassentoutbysomeoneotherthanDan.Thecontestasked youtoguesswhy.Hereareourcontestants… ClayButler
refusestoparticipateinNichole’spetoftheweek.Danand Jackhaveahistoryandit’snotpretty… BrainStew
Thiswasnotallthatfunny.Andby“notallthat,”wemeanit wasn’tfunnyatall. ZahriaPatrick
BrainStewsays… Abbyissosmart.Andfunny.Andpretty.Weloveherso much.Andnotjustbecausesheisinchargeoflayoutsand writingthisresponsetoday.(NotefromrealAbby:shutthehellupDan)
DanisbusytryingtogetbailforPanchoandDel (whoareindoggyjailforaconfidentialindiscretion). BrainStewsays… 1.PanchoandDelaredoggiesfromanoldemail. You’dknowthatifyoureademails. 2.Thisanswerwouldbefunnierifitwasexplicitly statedthatDanwashavingsexwiththesedogs, ratherthanjustimpliedassubtext. AudriAdams DanwasoutoftownandaskedifIwouldsenditfor him. BrainStewsays… Thisisthestupidestfuckinganswerwe’veeverread. RobWilson Ishedead?Pleaseletthatbetherightanswer! BrainStewsays… Wefeelyou,bro.No,notinthatway. NonniAdams AudriissendingthisinsteadofDanbecauseDanwas outpartyingallweekendlisteningtopunkmusic, ridingindoorrollercoasters,andpartakinginother delinquentshenanigans. BrainStewsays… NewOrderisanewwaveband,notapunkrock band,youtoothlesshillbilly.Butweliketheideaof himflyingoutofarollercoastertohisdeath. MeredithStroud AudriissendingthismessageinsteadofDanbecause Danisbusyfightingrobotninjasinanalternate dimension.Hehopestobefinishedbylunch,but fightingtherobotninjashastotakepriorityright now. BrainStewsays… Trustus,hehasNEVERpostponedlunchforany reason,ever. ANDTHEGIFTCARDGOESTO…ZAHRIAPATRICK! YoucanpickitupinthePLHCmainoffice.
ManintheMoo
Longago,afableaboutamaninthemoonhad originated.Thismythtoldthestoryexplainingwhythe moonappearstohaveafaceinitduringafullmoon. Nowadays,scientistsandmanyhumansonEarth cannotfathomthisstory,becausethe"face"inthe moondoesn'tactuallylooklikeaface.Althoughthisis justamyth,isitreallytoofar-fetched?
HereatthegloomyUMSLProvincialHouse,studentsandprofessorshave thebeliefthelegendwasmisheard,anditisactuallyaboutthemaninthe moo.
AsyoufirstcometotheHonorsCollege,you'llbe welcomedintotheoriginofthetruestory,whichis thateverynight,ahumandressedinacow costumecomesoutduringthewitchinghourtrying toconvertallUMSLgoerstovegansintheirsleep.
Studentshavereportedhearingyellsofsayings, suchas,"Don'teatmeat"and"savetheanimals".If thisisn'tspookyenough,therehavealsobeen reportsofanimalproductsgoingmissingovernight, beingreplacedwithtofu,bugs,andalmonds.
SchoolchildrenbythecemeteryhereatUMSLhaveevenmadeupnursey rhymestowarnpeopleofthedangersthatlurkahead.Therhymegoes, “One,two,moomooscomingforyou.Three,four,betterlockthekitchen door.Five,sixgrabyourSlimJimsticks.Seven,eight,don'tletitgopast date...."Atrulyhauntingsong.
Beforeyouchoosetocontinueyoureducationat UMSLyouneedtobeawareoftheManintheMoo.
HalloweenCostumeIdeas HerearesomecuteoriginalHalloweencostumes GigaChad MontyLopez LinusfromSharkboy andLavagirl UglyBetty TheQueen Boogie man/woman fromScary Godmother
DiaryofanAfricanStudent.
DearDiary,todayinthecafeteriaIbecameawareofaveryimportantAmerican issue.BeforeImovedtotheU.S.,Ialwaysthoughtaboutraceandracisminthe contextofslavery,andIassumed(IthinkIwaswrong)thatbecauseslaverywasnow illegalandallthelawssurroundingracismhavebeenabolished,thenitmakessense tosaythatthereisnoracisminAmerica.Buttoday,Ilearnedthatthereissomething peoplecall“systematicracism.”Itsoundslikeaveryseriousandimportantthing, anditmustbebecausetheladywhotoldmeaboutitwascryingbythetimeshewas donetalking.Shewentonandonabouthowthesystemisoppressing“usblackfolk” andhowweneedtostandfirmandbeonourguardandhelpeachother.Itall soundedveryvagueyetinterestinglyprofound.Theladywascrying,andallIneeded fromherwasamediumsizedhotchocolate!
DearDiary,haveyoueverheardofthetermMicroaggressions?SinceI discoveredthisterm,I’vebecomeincreasinglyawareofthepresenceof microaggressionsinmyownlife.Buttoday,whenIspoketoCousinJojoaboutthem, Ihadtohanguponherbecauseshecalledmeracist!Iwastellingherabouthow peoplecomplimentmy“goodEnglish”whentheylearnthatI’mfromCameroon(I endupsayingAfricabecausenobodyknowswhereCameroonis),andhowmy professorshaveahardtimesayingmynameright,whenshegiggledandsaidI shouldn’tdwellonsuchthingsbecausethepeopleprobablydidn’tmeantooffend me;thenshecalledmeracistbecauseIsaidwhitepeoplearesoentitledand culturallyincompetent.CousinJojoisNOTwhite.
DearDiary,thejanitorIalwaysgreetonmywaytoStatisticssaidIoughtto supporttheDemocraticparty.HewasaghastwhenItoldhimIthoughtabortionwas asinandaskedifIhadbeenwatchingFOXNews.Atfirst,Iwasconfusedaboutwhy hewasbringingupfoxes,thenwebothlaughedwhenheexplainedwhathemeant.I hadbeenwatchingCNN.Hewentonandon(likethewomanatthecafeteria)about howthedecisiontoabortachildbelongedtothemotherandhowold,whitemenon theSupremeCourthavenowsucceededtotakeawaythatright.Hesaidthatasa woman,ablackwoman,itwaswrongformetobeagainstabortionbecauseIhadto fightformyrightsandthoseofmyblackbrothersandsisters,usemyvotetokeep abortionlegal.I’mnotsurewhyhebroughtupthevotingpart,Ishouldhavetoldhim IwasnotAmericanandthatwasokwithme.
DearDiary,didyouknowthattherearesomethingsthatareconsidered“white people”thingsandothersthatareconsidered“blackpeople”things?Iwastoldbymy cousin(notJojo,we’renottalking)thatStarbucksisa“traditionallywhiteplace”and soisthesportcalledBaseball.AndI’vebeentoldbymyauntieonmorethanone occasiontonotbuythoseuglyshoesthatonlywhitepeoplewearorputonthose terriblylongeyelasheswornbyflashy,blackwomenonTV.Itallsoundsveryfunny, yetIcan’thelpbutbecurioustolearnmore.
DearDiary,Jojocalledmetoday,butshedidn’tapologizeforwhatshesaid.I stillcan’tbelieveshesaidthat.HowcanIberacist?I’mblack!ShesaidIwasa perpetuatorofwhatshecalled“made-upracism”andthatIwasgoingthrougha phasethatalmosteveryblackimmigrantgoesthroughwhentheymovetoaWestern countrylikeAmerica,especiallywhentheyliveinapredominantlywhitearea.She calmlyexplained(hercalmnessirritatedme)thatshehadgonethroughthesame phasewhenshewasstilltryingtounderstandissuessurroundingraceinAmerica. ShewouldcomplaintootherslikeIhadcomplainedtoher,andsheconcludedthat racewasthereasonforeverything.ShemadeastatementIwillneverforget: “RacismdoesexistinAmerica,butsometimesIfeellikepeoplewantittoexistfor theirownagenda.I’mnotobsessedaboutraceanymore;Ijustwanttoknowpeople individuallyandnotseemyskincolorasamembershipcard.”
Westilldon’tquiteunderstandyou,Michael.Butit’sokay!
NewHoleintheOzone
Weallknowabouttheholeintheozonelayerthathas beenhoveringoverAustralia/Antarticaduetohuman activitiessuchasfactories,automobiles,andhairsprayin the80's,buttherehasbeenanewholeformedabovethe provincialhousehereatUMSL.
Scientistbelievethatthismaybeduetothefoodinthe provincialhalldiningthatiscausinganyonewhoeats theretohaveradioactiveflatulence.Thismaysoundvery harmfulforthecommunityhereatthehonorscollege,but thepeopleundergoingtheseradioactiveeffectarealso developedskinmadeoutofLiOH(LithiumHydroxide). ThisisallowingpeopletoabsorbtheCO2thatisheating theplanet.
GretaThunberghasspokeonthisabnormalphenomenon andsaysthatit'sactuallyreversingthegreenhouseeffect thathasbeencausingglobalwarming.
Inconclusion,thefoodattheprovincialhall,although almostinedible,issavingtheplanet.
#TheBlackBeanBurgerIsActuallyReallyGood
Beforepro-hofood Afterpro-hofood
TheHonorsCollegeHONORS2050-001:ScienceintheNewsNewsContest!
TheHonorsCollegeInterpretationofNPR’sBlufftheListenernewscontest!Broughttoyoubytheamazingly news-savvyanddiscerningstudentsenrolledinHONORS2050-001:ScienceintheNews.
Forthoseofyouwhomaynotknow(andwhyaren’tlisteningtoyourlocalNPRstation?)theBluffthe ListenernewscontestisasegmentfromNPR’sradioshow,Wait,wait...don’ttellme,wherenewsstories aboutanews-worthytopicarepresentedtothecontestantbutonlyoneistrue.Towin,thecontestantmust pickthetruenewsstoryfromthefakenewsstories.Inourversion,wepresentnewsstoriesaboutascience topicandthecontestant(that’syou)mustpickthetruenewsstory.WeknowyoucoulduseGoogletohelp youfindthetruestory,butdoyoureallywantyourtriumphtaintedbyGoogle?
SubmityourGoogle-freeguesstoDanGerthviaemailatGerthD@umsl.edu.
ThefirstFIVEcorrectentrieswillbeselectedtowinamysteryprizeaswellaseternalgloryandbragging rights!EntrieswillbeaccepteduntilMonday10/17/2022.
STORY#1
FriendshipsBasedinTechnicolor
Didyourmindimmediatelythinkaboutyouand yourbestfriend'sfavoritecolor?Ifso,thenthisis thearticleforyou.Don’tworry,we’vegotdatato provethatcolorsandfriendshipshavemorethan justacorrelation!AstudydoneattheUniversityof Mainediscoveredthatthesameareaofthebrain thatisusedtodeterminecoloralsodetermines friendpreferences.Fromthisstartingpoint, researchersdelveddeeperandfoundthatmost studentspickedpeoplewhosefavoritecolorisred tobeclosefriendswith.Theyalsofoundthatifa person’sfavoritecolorwasbrown,theywereless likelytobechosen.Thecolorwheeltheoryalso showsthatyou’remorelikelytoattractthosewho complementyourfavoritecolorversusthosewho areonthesamesideofthecolorspectrum.Sothat brightpinkdressthat'syourfavorite,canattractor evenrepelpeoplebasedontheirfavoritecolor.
Previouspsychologyresearchaboutcolorhasshown howviewingcoloraffectsouremotions.Our favoritecolorhasahighprobabilityofaffectingour personalities,relationships,andmore.Though follow-upresearchisstillbeingdone,researchers fromthesamecohortattheUniversityofMaine hypothesizethatcomplementarycolorsare attractedtoeachother.Forexample,whilethe colorredevokespassionandfire,it'scomplemented bypeacefulshadesofgreen.Researchers acknowledgethatthiscolor-personalitycorrelation maynotbepresentineveryperson,buttheresults ofthisstudypresentanexcitingnewpossibility.
BlufftheListenerContest!
ThetopicforthiseditionisWhyyouhavefriendswhetheryouwantthemornot
AttractionisintheBlood
Firstimpressionsareimportant,buttheyarenoteverything.Boldclotheswith strikingcolorscanbeintimidating,andneutralcolorscanbecomfortingor simplyplain.Butwhatifwhatyouknewcouldnotovercomewhatyoufeel? Whatifyouremotionstowardpeoplewerecontrolledbygenetics? Bloodtypeisacrucialparttoaperson’sbiologyinmanyways.It,ofcourse, dictateswhocanreceivebloodfromwho,anditalsocanmakeloose predictionsonwhatmedicalconditionspeoplearesusceptibleto.Forthose needingcontext,therearefourbloodtypes:A,B,ABandO.
Youmayknowthatcertainbloodtypesareknowntoattractmosquitoes.One thingyoumaynotknowisitcanalsoattractfriendships.Throughyourpores, whetherbysweating,crying,orevenyourspit(gross,Iknow),chemicalsignals aregivenoutthatcertainbloodtypeswillfindmoreattractivethanothers.For example,bloodtypeABisfoundtobemoreattractedtoAorBbloodtypes thantypeO.Ontheotherhand,typeObloodtypetendstobemorelikelytobe attractedtoanothertypeO.
Forexample,inpartsofAsia,horoscopesarewrittennotforyourstarsign,but foryourbloodgroup.Thisisalsosaidtodefinewhoyou’llpairupwithfor marriage,basedonbloodtypepersonalitytraits.
Ifyouarestillnotconvinced,in1929,ProfessorTokejiFurukawaconducted researchabouttheconnectionbetweenpersonalityandbloodgroups.Hefound thatcertainbloodtypesimplicatecertainpersonalitytraits.
Humanslovetobelievethatwehavechoices.Whatifgeneticsarewhatreally definewhowecareabout?Whatifattractionisreallyduetorandomchance?
STORY#3
ScienceSaysaNewFriendisJustaSniffAway
DoyouwanttomakemorefriendsoncampusthissemesteratUMSL,ormaybejustingeneral?Listen,Idon’t
STORY#2
wanttoadmitwhatapost-quarantineworldhasdonetomysociallife.Luckilyformyselfandmanyotherlonely studentshereatUMSLandaroundtheworld,thekeymighthavebeenrightunderournosesforyears.Anew scientificstudyconcludedthatyoursmellhasanimpactonwhoyoubecomefriendswith.Researchersusedan electronicnosetodeterminethatfriendssmellmorelikeeachotherthanrandomstrangers. Researchersrecruitedparticipantstostudytheeffectsofsmellonfriendship.Afteranextensivestudy,the researchersconcludedthattherewasaconnectionbetweenscentandfriendship.Thenexttimeyougotoa PLHCSAeventlookingfornewfriends,youmighthavebetterluckusingyournosethanyoureyes. So,ifyoudon’thaveanyfriendsyet,gettosniffin';thiswillincreaseyourfriendfindingpercentagebyahigh margin.Becarefulbecausefluandcoldseasonisjustaroundthecorner.Notgettingsickwillincreaseyour chancesofsmellingotherfriendlessUMSLstudentsinyourarea.Ifyouarenotinterestedinfriendsfor friendshipsake,remember:thecampusgeesearevicious.Itisrecommendedtotravelingroupsforyoursafety. Havingahealthynosewillhelpyousniffoutpeopleyou’llgetalongwithforfun,friends,andfatalencounters (withgeese).Rememberthisquickrhymetoassistyouinyouracademiccareer:Iftheysmellthebest,they're usefulonyourUMSLquest.Usethisnewresearchtobetternavigateyourcollegelifeandsniffstrangers,but disclaimer:researchdoesnotsupportsmellinggeesetofindtheonesmorelikeyourself….yet.
DidYouKnow? Thewomanseeninthesepicturesisaknown Molassacredenierandapologist Howtheseviewsarenotconflictingwewill neverknow Ifyouseeherfeelfreetotellherthatthe Molassacreisveryreal,andnotverycash money. (Notefromtheeditor:Gotohell,Aidan)
WhatthehelldidIjustread?“BrainStew'smissionistoprovideforthePierre LacledeHonorsCollegestudentbodyaforumforuncensoredfreethought, commentary,andcreativity,aswellasnewsandeventlistingsfromPLHCSAand otherrelatedcampusorganizations,”yakyakyak!WepublishALOTOFTHINGS. Like,thingsthatmakeEdregretevertakingajobattheHonorsCollege!
We’vebeenpublishingsince1991(or1993).LongerthanDan’scarhasbeen running,somehow.Wemustbedoingagoodjobthough.Despiteourbest efforts,grown-upskeepgivingusawards—stufflikeBestSustainedProgramin 2012and2017,andBestCulturalAwarenessProgramin2018.Evensomeshady committeecalledthe“NationalCollegiateHonorsCouncil”gaveusawardsin 2017,2018,andProgramoftheYearin2020.
Disclaimer:Weissuenocontentguidelinesbeyondthoseofstate,local,and federallaw.Allcontentistheresponsibilityofthecreator.UMSL,PLHC,PLHCSA, andtheBrainStewstaffareinnowayobligatedtoprintanything.Inshort,submit whatyouwant,butwedon’thavetoprintitifyou’rebeingalittlemonster!
Howtosubmit:Sendyourstufftoumslbrainstew@umsystem.edu Howtostalk: @umslbrainstew@UMSLBrainStew ���������������������� ��������������������������������!
