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“I did not anticipate it being such a major change. But it was. A bit like a plant being ripped from soil or a bird torn from its nest”.
How will we know when it’s time to move? I think, based on my experience and those I’ve spoken to, there is usually a combination of circumstances or a certain ‘trigger’. The former could be more general - a sense of restlessness, a desire to have ‘at least one more adventure’ – or specific, such as needy parents or a stressful job. The trigger for us was when my husband had an unexpected diagnosis – a tumour in the heart – and needed emergency surgery. He came through the operation spectacularly well, but it made us think. Do any of us know how long we’ve got? What do we want for the next season of life? We decided our long-held dream to move to the country was a now or never thing. He began to look for jobs and when this one came up, it seemed to make sense. He is a Baptist Minister and the church was almost exactly what he was looking for. Our youngest was nearing the end of university and had only one more summer at home. I wanted to write more, and a move out of London would make this possible. Besides, I was brought up in the country and
had always yearned for fields and trees and a soft scoop of sky beyond the window, instead of concrete. Finally, my very ill in-laws had moved here to be nearer my brother in law’s family but were proving challenging to care for. What about my job? It’s hard leaving a job when there is nothing to go to. You may be in the fortunate position of being able to work from home or to start applying for jobs in the area, once you know you’re moving. Or you may not. I had decided to take a term or two off as I had a couple of paid writing projects to be getting on with and I knew I could combine those with settling us in at home. But the thing is, if this move is right, it is right for both of you. It might be that you will have to wait before getting the right job but there may be steps you can take to prepare for that. I did short and long-term supply teaching for a while and finally found a couple of days a week at a school five minutes’ walk from my door. It is actually perfect.
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