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We made this


Publisher Nancy Stuski Editor in Chief Theresa Everline Senior Editor Patrick Rapa News Editor Samantha Melamed Arts Editor/Copy Chief Emily Guendelsberger Digital Media Editor/Movies Editor Paulina Reso Food Editor/Listings Editor Caroline Russock Staff Writers Ryan Briggs, Daniel Denvir Assistant Copy Editor Carolyn Wyman Associate Web Producer Carly Szkaradnik Contributors Sam Adams, A.D. Amorosi, Rodney Anonymous, Mary Armstrong, Meg Augustin, Justin Bauer, Bryan Bierman, Shaun Brady, Peter Burwasser, Mark Cofta, Alison Dell, Adam Erace, David Anthony Fox, Caitlin Goodman, K. Ross Hoffman, Deni Kasrel, Alli Katz, Gary M. Kramer, Drew Lazor, Gair “Dev 79” Marking, Robert McCormick, Andrew Milner, Annette Monnier, Michael Pelusi, Elliott Sharp, Tom Tomorrow, John Vettese, Nikki Volpicelli, Brian Wilensky Editorial Interns Naveed Ahsan, Michael Buozis, Lalita Clozel, Jordyn Horowitz, Michelle Ma, Mike Mullen, Laura Petro, Matt Schickling, Lara Witt Production Director Michael Polimeno Editorial Art Director Reseca Peskin Senior Designer Evan M. Lopez Editorial Designers Brenna Adams, Jenni Betz Staff Photographer Neal Santos Contributing Photographers Jessica Kourkounis, Mark Stehle Contributing Illustrators Ryan Casey, Don Haring Jr., Joel Kimmel, Cameron K. Lewis, Thomas Pitilli, Matthew Smith Human Resources Ron Scully (ext. 210) Circulation Director Mark Burkert (ext. 239) Senior Account Managers Colette Alexandre (ext. 250), Nick Cavanaugh (ext. 260), Sharon MacWilliams (ext. 262), Stephan Sitzai (ext. 258) Account Manager Amanda Gambier (ext. 228), Megan Musser (ext. 215) Office Coordinator/Adult Advertising Sales Alexis Pierce (ext. 234) Founder & Editor Emeritus Bruce Schimmel

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A U G U S T 1 - A U G U S T 7 , 2 0 1 3 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T 123 Chestnut Street, Third Floor, Phila., PA 19106. 215-735-8444, Tip Line 215-7358444 ext. 241, Letters to the Editor, Listings Fax 215-8751800, Classified Ads 215-248-CITY, Advertising Fax 215-735-8535, Subscriptions 215-735-8444 ext. 235 Philadelphia City Paper is published and distributed every Thursday in Philadelphia, Montgomery, Chester, Bucks & Delaware Counties, in South Jersey and in Northern Delaware. Philadelphia City Paper is available free of charge, limited to one copy per reader. Additional copies may be purchased from our main office at $1 per copy. No person may, without prior written permission from Philadelphia City Paper, take more than one copy of each issue. Pennsylvania law prohibits any person from inserting printed material of any kind into any newspaper without the consent of the owner or publisher. Contents copyright © 2013, Philadelphia City Paper. All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced without written permission from the publisher. Philadelphia City Paper assumes no obligation (other than cancellation of charges for actual space occupied) for accidental errors in advertising, but will be glad to furnish a signed letter to the buying public.

contents Who is that mask man?

The Naked City .........................................................................6 Arts & Entertainment.........................................................22 Movies.........................................................................................26 The Agenda ..............................................................................28 Food & Drink ...........................................................................34 COVER PHOTOGRAPH BY MARK STEHLE DESIGN BY RESECA PESKIN

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the thebellcurve CP’s Quality-o-Life-o-Meter

[ +1 ]

House-flipping is on the rise in Northern Liberties,Fishtown and Passyunk Square. But everywhere else they’re just kind of folding into themselves.

[ +1 ]

Haverford College starts using a herd of 29 goats instead of lawn mowers to keep its grounds tidy.Well, not so much “tidy” as “dotted with goat turds.”

[ -2 ]

An arsonist sets fire to 20 cars in a parking lot in the Northeast.Well, you know, he’s an arsonist now.

[ -2 ]

FormerWingBowlchampionBill“ElWingador” Simmons faces a possible seven years behind bars after pleading guilty to cocaine-possession charges.Say it ain’t so, guy who’s famous for transcendent acts of self-destruction.

[ +3 ]

ThePhiladelphiaEagleswillretireDonovan McNabb’s number.And his spit-up bib.

[ +1 ]

Strip clubs argue that the city’s amusement tax shouldn’t apply to lap dances,as they are performances of“contemporary American theater.”It’s true.About 50 percent of them play out like Zoo Story.

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[ +1 ]

Neuroscience research company Lumosity namesAmbler,Pa.,the 38th-smartest city in the country.Psst.Dude,everybody inAmbler thinks Lumosity is a real thing. It’s,like,totes adorbs how proud they are right now. SliCE Pizza wins South Philly Review’s Pizza Olympics as the best in town.Don’t you worry, Ambler — you still have the smartest pizza.


Sylvester Stallone announces he will once again reprise the Rocky Balboa role,this time playing mentor to the aspiring-boxer grandson of Apollo Creed. “I don’t have the heart to tell you how this ends, kid,” says Tommy “The Machine” Gunn to the TV in the shop window. “I guess I never had the heart.”

[ -1 ]

Campbell’s Soup will add a “Philly-Style Cheesesteak”varietytotheirChunkysoup line.Anybody have aWet-Nap? McNabb just spit up again.

This week’s total: +2 | Last week’s total: +11

CRYPT KEEPER: Paulette Rhone, president of the Friends of Mount Moriah, is trying to keep the cemetery clean while two municipalities wrangle with legal and financial challenges. neal santos

[ perpetuity ]

A GrAve situAtion Mount Moriah Cemetery is poised for revival, if a thicket of legal, financial and ecological issues can be resolved. By Paulina Reso


randishing a machete, samuel Ricks hacks at a tangle of chest-high weeds obscuring a tombstone. With each chop, more of the monument becomes visible: first a name, Colonel William McCandless, then years of birth and death, 1834 to 1884. after a few hours, the union army officer’s plot has been tidied, and Ricks, 59, hasn’t broken a sweat. He’s been doing these backbreaking, unpaid cleanups for two years in Mount Moriah, a 200-acre cemetery that straddles the border of Philadelphia and Yeadon and has presented a daunting challenge to all involved. Long abandoned, Mount Moriah relies on volunteers like Ricks to maintain its grounds, a Herculean undertaking given the graveyard’s vastness and the hydra-like invasive plants that require constant attention. But Ricks and other members of Friends of Mount Moriah Cemetery, a volunteer group committed to preserving the space, have big dreams. they envision a respite for cyclists, bird watchers, historians and picnickers. But Mount Moriah’s issues — legal, financial and ecological — could take years to untangle, especially when there is no precedent for handling a situation of this scope and complexity. Part of the orphaned cemetery is located in the city of Philadelphia; the rest is in Yeadon Borough. the two municipalities have cre-

ated a corporation to figure out what to do next. this, say advocates, could be a turning point: sprawling Mount Moriah, long a site for short-dumping and drug use, could either drag down an impoverished neighborhood or become the key to its revival. Established in 1855, Mount Moriah was once a natural sanctuary where families picnicked on sundays. By the 1980s, though, the cemetery had fallen into disrepair. Weeds grew into trees and wild grasses blanketed tombstones. the Friends of Mount Moriah wanted to help maintain the grounds, but the owners refused, says the group’s president, Paulette Rhone, whose husband is buried there. then, in 2011, families of the interred learned through an outgoing message on the cemetery’s voicemail that Mount Moriah, run by a private nonprofit association, had closed without warning. they wanted answers. the city of Philadelphia tried bringing the owners to court for failing to maintain the cemetery’s historic gatehouse, but the last board member, Horatio C. Jones Jr., had died in 2004. (some employee had apparently kept it going for seven more years before abandoning the task.) Without any living board members, the Mount Moriah Cemetery association was defunct. But it would take complex legal maneuvers to wrestle ownership from its dead hands. the good news was that when the cemetery closed, the Friends could finally get to work. “It was a blessing in disguise,” Rhone says. With help from the city of Philadelphia, they mowed large swaths, removed a den of wild dogs and disposed of illegally dumped

An outgoing voicemail announced it had closed.

>>> continued on page 8

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[ a million stories ]

ICE storm When police mistakenly accused North Philly resident Fernando Ruiz of hiding a fugitive in his house one evening in May 2010, it seemed the situation couldn’t get worse. a policeman had struck him in the head with a pistol; others arrived and began beating him on the street. One held a gun to his wife’s head, right in front of their 4- and 6-year-old children. and Ruiz was arrested, taken to the hospital and then jail. But it did get worse — much worse — his wife, ana, says through a translator. “I told the police I wanted to go to the hospital with them and they told me, ‘No. If you go to the hospital, then we’ll arrest you also.’ they said, ‘go home and wait for us to call you. ’ the call never came.” Ruiz (not his real name) was an undocumented Mexican immigrant. so instead of being released on bail, he was handed over to u.s. Immigration and Customs Enforcement (ICE), where deportation proceedings began before his criminal case was even heard. that’s because Philadelphia has an unusual collaboration with ICE that allows the agency to access Philly’s Preliminary arraignment Reporting system database. Further, the city honors “ICE holds” by detaining people who might be in line for deportation. Or, as Nicole Kligerman, of the immigrant-rights group New sanctuary Movement puts it, “it makes the Philly Police a wing of immigration.” activists say it’s time that changed. the license is up for renewal in august. so, on Wednesday, New sanctuary supporters wrapped up a 40-day fast to demand an end to police-ICE collaboration in Philly. they estimate that the city has spent at least $500,000

since 2008 on ICE holds; the license pays only $5,600 a year. says Kligerman, “It has resulted in a lot of tacit racial profiling ... and created a lot of fear.” the Da, the mayor and Municipal Court President Judge together can decide whether to end the license. When it came up for renewal in 2010, Mayor Nutter took a stand against using it to pick up witnesses or victims for deportation, but did not terminate the agreement. the Da and city administration did not respond to inquiries by press time. For the Ruizes, though, the damage is done. Fernando was acquitted in June 2010. this year, he finally received a u-visa, given to victims of crime. His wife is seeking the same. But in the meantime, he lost his job and paid thousands in legal fees; the whole family needed therapy to deal with the trauma. ana says she just wants the system to change — and for police and ICE to be run separately. Because, she says, “to be here is not a crime.” —samantha Melamed

off thE rECord Euphemisms may not pay the rent. But, then again, they can’t hurt. at least, that seemed to be the thinking on tuesday morning as Mayor Nutter addressed a few thousand ex-offenders at the Pennsylvania Convention Center. nutter doesn’t say “exoffender,” he explained; he prefers the term “returning citizen.” Call them what you will: Returning citizens represent an estimated one in five Philadelphians. Yet, in May, the city was caught off-guard when a job fair for that citizen class drew 3,000 job-seekers, way beyond the event’s capacity. they shut the >>> continued on page 10

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theresa stigale FliCkr: PhiladelPhiaPhotos

By Daniel Denvir

lIkE a hawk ➤ REP. ALLYSON SCHWARTZ is the frontrunner

in a crowded field of Democrats seeking to take on abysmally unpopular Republican Gov. Tom Corbett. But Schwartz upset progressives last week when she joined a bipartisan coalition of national-security hawks to vote down legislation aimed at blocking the National Security Agency’s dragnet collection of American phone records. And, though it is unclear how the vote would reflect decisions Schwartz might make as governor, upset they should be. Her Philly colleagues, Reps. Bob Brady and Chaka Fattah, both voted “yes” on the amendment, joining progressive Democrats and libertarian-leaning Republicans (including four from Pennsylvania) in challenging President Obama and House Speaker John Boehner. Schwartz’s vote mattered: The measure, which would have barred the NSA from surveilling any American who is not a specific target of a law-enforcement investigation, failed by a slim 205-217. Nonetheless, it now seems likely that some reforms are inevitable. “I think we should go after bad guys, but I don’t think we should infringe upon the rights of lawabiding citizens,” Fattah says. “It was a close vote, and I think it made a statement.” Schwartz, on the other hand, issued a statement explaining that the bill “did not achieve the critical balance between national security and civil liberties. Congress must engage in ongoing oversight and review of our national security activities so that we adequately protect both the security of our nation and the civil liberties of all Americans.” But Congress has not prioritized that balance in the past. In fact, the only reason politicians like Schwartz are even publicly acknowledging the issue is because whistle-blower Edward Snowden released the theretofore-classified information. Obama has also said he “welcomes” such a debate. But Snowden is currently hiding from the president’s prosecutors in a Russian airport, trying to find asylum. I don’t know what Schwartz’s hard-line, war-onterror mind-set would mean in the Governor’s Mansion. But perhaps this vote will provide all candidates an opportunity to address two other wars that also pit civil liberties against public safety, have no end and create more problems than they solve: the “wars” on drugs and crime. Candidates should commit to being “smart on crime” and downsizing the state’s bloated and destructive prison system. Hopefully, that conversation will begin soon. Voters deserve an opportunity to subject candidates to tough questions and make up their minds. That is, after all, what elections are for.  Send feedback to

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Long Tall Woman


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✚ A Grave Situation

[ the naked city ]

<<< continued from page 6

concrete chunks, old cars and more than 900 tires. In addition to the Friends’ monthly cleanups, some volunteers come to the cemetery to tend patches of land they’ve come to think of as their own. A woman named Donna treats the area behind her house like an extension of her backyard. In the early days she chased away dumpers, and now, with chainsaws and heavy-duty mowers, she opens paths and tends tombstones. Bud McCafferty, a resident of Cinnaminson, N.J., travels to Mount Moriah two to three times each week with his mower. He doesn’t have a loved one here; he’s powered by a sense of outrage. “The human race goes away, this is what it’s going to look like in downtown Philadelphia,” he says. Still, the volunteers alone can’t keep up with all 200 acres. At the urging of aggrieved families, Philly and Yeadon began the process of taking over the cemetery. In December 2012, they created Mount Moriah Cemetery Preservation Corp. and installed representatives from the city, Yeadon and the community on its board. Today, though, progress has been meager. One problem is turmoil in Yeadon’s Borough Hall. “They have had some political distractions,” says Brian Abernathy, president of the preservation corporation’s board and interim executive director of the Philadelphia Redevelopment Authority. In the last year, Yeadon’s council president was arrested for extortion, the borough manager stepped down and a highly contested mayoral primary was held. “All of those things led to a situation where it was difficult for me to figure out who I should call and who I shouldn’t call in order to advance the ball on some of our issues,” says Abernathy. Rohan Hepkins, Yeadon’s representative on the board, acknowledges that the vacant borough manager seat has disrupted progress. It’s unclear when that position will be filled. Hepkins hopes that in January 2014, when the new mayor and council members take their seats, the situation will stabilize. Hepkins won the Democratic mayoral primary and is unopposed in the general election. He says that, as mayor, he’ll make Mount Moriah a top priority. “I’m just preaching patience,” Hepkins says. Over the next year, the corporation plans to develop a landscape-maintenance plan, reconcile burial records and resolve legal questions, all complicated tasks. “It has been harder and more arduous than I ever thought it would be,” Abernathy says. Currently, archival experts and volunteers are organizing the cemetery’s extensive records. (Approximately 85,000 people are believed to be buried at Mount Moriah.) Once it is known how much space is available for new burials, the corporation will decide if Mount Moriah can be an operating, profitable cemetery or a passive open space. Abernathy expects it will be the latter. Then there’s the hairy legal situation. To dissolve the obsolete association that still owns the cemetery, the new corporation is trying to convince the Attorney General to file a case for receivership in Orphans’ Court. Once those issues are resolved, the corpora-

tion can begin thinking about financing a long-term plan. The cemetery’s perpetual-care fund holds only $10,000. Annual preservation costs could be anywhere from $250,000 to $1 million, Abernathy estimates. Hepkins says the bulk of funding will need to come from private-sector grants and donations. There’s a long list of funding targets — historicpreservation groups, environmental-protection organizations, veterans’ associations, families of the interred and churches — but they won’t be solicited anytime soon. “Until we have some plans on paper to say, ‘This is what we will do with Mount Moriah Cemetery,’ it makes it very difficult to engage in that conversation,” Abernathy says. Rhone and others believe Mount Moriah, if restored, could be a boon to Southwest Philadelphia, a poor, underserved

“It has been harder than I ever thought.” neighborhood with little green space. Rhone imagines students studying history and horticulture while cyclists from the nearby East Coast Greenway, dubbed the urban sister to the Appalachian Trail, make a pit stop. Opulent mausoleums and haunting angel statues grace the cemetery’s rolling hills. Hawks, eagles and even a 10-point buck have been seen roaming the grounds. With mayors, baseball players, Medal of Honor recipients and unsung heroes buried there, Mount Moriah is an untapped repository of Philadelphia history. “Mount Moriah is a special place and, for whatever reason, it’s grown on me,” Abernathy says. “But the problems are very complicated and not easy to overcome. I think patience, optimism and hope are going to become key, but I think that in the next few years we’re going to see something special happen.” (

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[ the naked city ]

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“The whole country is looking on to see how this goes today.” whole thing down and promised to put together

another event, one that would be bigger and better (or at least better planned). By 8:30 a.m., around 3,200 prospective employees had preregistered for the replacement Ex-Offender Expo, according to LaMonte Williams of the Mayor’s Office of Re-Integration services for Ex-Offenders (RIsE), and hundreds more were lining up for onsite registration. the event included job-interview training, an expungement clinic and an expo with 100 employers. Compared to some returning citizens, Isaac Fullman, 31, is in good shape. He’s never been to prison and his record includes only a misdemeanor. But he was laid off from his job eight months ago, and has been looking ever since. as to what’s standing in his way, he says, “I believe it’s the economy more than anything.” But he has applied for a pardon to remove the misdemeanor from his record. that process goes through the state Board of Pardons in Harrisburg. his estimated wait time? Four and a half years. Fullman hopes to find a new job, as a cook or general laborer, long before then. Everett gillison, the mayor’s chief of staff, says the first returning-citizens job fair, five years ago,

drew 200 candidates and placed 25 in jobs. Now, the city is working on a much larger scale. In fact, says Williams, other municipalities have been calling RIsE with questions: “the whole country is looking on

to see how this goes today.” Williams was hired six months ago as the junior man in RIsE’s two-person career-development team, which places more than 500 people in jobs each year. they cultivate relationships with employers who may be attracted by the tax breaks

and fidelity bonds that come with hiring returning citizens — and then come to realize that this class of employees has a lot to offer. “they’re finding their turnover rates decrease,” Williams says. “they’re finding these individuals are very prompt, reliable. they have a need to succeed more than someone walking in off the street.” —S.M.

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the naked city

[ culture clash ]

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For immigrant parents, customs of corporal punishment lead to conflicts with schools and, at times, contact with DHS. By Lalita Clozel



ean-Marie Kouassi grew up in the Ivory Coast, a West African country where “discipline is expected to be hands-on.” When he misbehaved, his aunt would punish him by sprinkling a mixture of crushed ginger, water and pepper into his eyes and nose. The pain, he says, was “indescribable.” There, physical punishments were to be expected: “Beating is a sign of parents caring.” Now a parent in West Philadelphia, Kouassi has his own way of disciplining his two young children when they act up: He makes them write out their apologies. But not all immigrant parents find it easy to adjust to American mores around child-rearing, he says. “We have to adapt, but we’re not a machine.” Indeed, many immigrant parents from Africa, the Caribbean, Asia and elsewhere have brought with them customs of corporal punishment — customs that, in some cases, might be deemed child abuse. The result has been a troubling culture clash. It has brought a unique set of challenges for schools in immigrant-heavy areas, say parents, school staff and community activists, and has led to run-ins with (and a deep mistrust of) the Department of Human Services (DHS). Sometimes, parents complain that kids, liberated from physical discipline, run out of control. Teachers, meanwhile, are put in an uncomfortable position when they have to decide whether to report parents to DHS. And

DHS enforces rules that don’t account for cultural differences, at the risk of tearing families apart. A proposed state law that would expand the definition of child abuse could exacerbate the issue. For children, the conflict between parents and an intervening government agency can aggravate the situation. Take, for example, a West Philly middle-school student originally from Haiti, who requested anonymity to avoid causing trouble at home. She says her parents beat her regularly — out of anger. They turn into “monster[s],” she says. Her teachers reported her case to DHS after observing marks on her arms. The girl explains that, after she refused to eat dinner one night, her parents had whipped her with an electrical cord. She says they told her the reason they didn’t use a belt was “because, they say, we can’t feel it.” After a social worker visited her house, her parents stopped beating her. But they’re even angrier now, she says. They threaten her, saying things like, “I hope next time [DHS visits] they will take you!” In city schools, staff might find themselves caught in a tough spot: They say the children of immigrants at times don’t respond to verbal reprimands, but worry that calling the parents will only reset the cycle of abuse. “We do notice the attitude of immigrant children sometimes are flippant, sometimes are not doing work, sometimes joke about the teachers,” says Duranton Dormeus, a Haitian immigrant and a bilingual counselor assistant for the School District of Philadelphia. Those, he says, are “things that would be unthinkable” back home. The last resort for schools, besides suspension, is to call the parents, he says — even if that means sending children home to be beaten. “Principals and teachers, they have their hands tied, too,” he says.

“Beating kids is a sign of parents caring.”

[ the naked city ]

Meanwhile, those adapting to American modes of parenting often say they’re doing so out of fear. That’s because the specter of DHS intervention can make disciplining children a frightening proposition. Pennsylvania state law actually allows for corporal punishment if it does not cause serious injury or extreme pain or distress, yet most parents who spoke with City Paper equated any degree of hitting or spanking with the possibility of getting arrested or having their children taken away. For that reason, parents consider hitting a teenager to be off limits. But this can upend the power balance in the household, they claim: The teen could report any physical discipline to the authorities. Above a certain age, “even if you threaten the child, he will go tell,” says Tanko Maharaja, a West Philadelphia parent of three kids and president of the Nigerian Cultural Association of Philadelphia. “You’re afraid of being locked up … afraid they will take your children away.” Some parents, says Maharaja, even send their children to the home country during their formative years, so the children can >>> continued on page 14

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[ the naked city ]


â&#x153;&#x161; Talking Smack

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Cultural differences can spark social-services interventions. be raised as the parents see fit. And once DHS does become involved, procedures can be particularly daunting for those who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t speak English. Once accused of abuse, parents are investigated and, if found guilty, placed on a registry. The procedure offers few opportunities to appeal. If DHS labels someone an abuser, the person is notified by a letter in English and Spanish that he or she has 45 days to dispute the decision. â&#x20AC;&#x153;If your request is late,â&#x20AC;? the letter says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;you may be on the child abuse register forever.â&#x20AC;? Parents must locate a translator and lawyer â&#x20AC;&#x201D; and fast. Those who donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t can suffer â&#x20AC;&#x153;horrible lifelong consequences,â&#x20AC;? says Kathy Gomez, chief of the Family Advocacy Unit of Community Legal Services. Those consequences include being barred from working in health care, schools and daycares. Sometimes, parents find out they are on the registry only after being turned down for jobs. Gomez notes that use of corporal punishment is only one of the cultural differences that can spark DHS intervention. Immigrant parents can get investigated for having overcrowded homes, allowing their children to go unsupervised or failing to get regular medical checkups. A bill passed by the state House in June would

expand the definition of child abuse to include acts not resulting in serious injury. If passed, that legislation might expose more parents to accusations, Gomez says. There is potentially good news though: DHS is changing the way it manages child-abuse cases, by outsourcing child-welfare services to local, community-based service organizations. That could be a net benefit for immigrant families, according to Gomez. However, it remains to be seen how those organizations will deal with the issue, or whether theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have the necessary cultural understanding, says Jeannel Tillman of Intercultural Family Services, which has been running DHS-funded workshops to help families communicate better and avoid necessitating intervention by child-protective services. She says that type of education is the key: â&#x20AC;&#x153;You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t just tell the family not to do this here, [and not] give them other means.â&#x20AC;? (

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iscover anxiety-free dental care: If the thought of a dental exam makes you squirm, shudder or even panic, you are not alone. Dental anxiety keeps many people from visiting the dentist. Unfortunately, putting off necessary dental care can place your overall health at risk. Contemporary dentistry offers a way for ° CONTINUED ON PAGE 16

315 Chestnut Street Philadelphia

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ow well do you know the environment around you? Sensing Change, an art exhibit and related programs, challenges you to see the environment with fresh eyes. A merging of art, science and history, Sensing Change invites you to explore and respond to daily shifts in the environment as well as long-term climate change. Pop your head inside a floating greenhouse of native plants and see what is usually underfoot. Watch gentle breezes and storm-force winds in real time across a digital map. View a record of precipitation that changes daily as jars fill with rain or remain empty. The artists in Sensing Change draw inspiration from scientific investigations, historical accounts and direct observations of the natural world. Artists include Vaughn Bell, Diane Burko, Roderick Coover, Katie Holten, Stacy Levy, Eve Mosher, and Fernanda Viégas and Martin Wattenberg. Whether filming from a kayak on the Delaware River or photographing glacial melt from a helicopter, these artists craft visions of the threats, upheaval and opportunities we now face. Sensing Change is on view beginning July 1 at the Chemical Heritage Foundation’s Hach Gallery in Old City. Admission is free. Summer hours: Mon.-Fri., 10 a.m.–5 p.m. Visit for more information.

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wendolyn Bye Dance Center at 3611 Lancaster Avenue in Philadelphia has been offering dance classes for children and adults for over 25 years. Classes from beginners to professional include, ballet, pointe, modern, jazz, tap, hip-hop, creative dance, musical theater, Zumba®, Pilates and Exercise with Dance. The school has a professional faculty of international reputation and is the home of Dancefusion, a professional modern dance company. Classes start on September 9th for the 2013-14 year. Also ask about our Main-Line location. Register at 215-222-7633 or




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he French International School, located in Bala Cynwyd, offers a strong academic curriculum in French and English, preschool through eighth grade. It attracts equal numbers of French, American and international families. There are more than 300 students enrolled, representing 50 nationalities. Graduates attend top public and private high schools in the Philadelphia area and their equivalents abroad. To reserve space at our next information session, please call 610-667-1284.


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More than 20 faces stare up at Aaron Cromie, each frozen into an exaggerated, often grotesque expression. One registers surprise, another dismay, still others confusion, elation or outrage. Someday in the near future, this mute rabble will convey those emotions to an audience; for now, they’re simply a menagerie of masks concocted at Cromie’s imaginative fancy. Barefoot and bearded, with thick-rimmed glasses and hair shooting up into three points like an unruly crown, the 40-year-old theater artist is animated enough to match his small army of false faces. “For the person performing in it, the mask is who they are,” Cromie says, chatting in a 17th-floor classroom at University of the Arts while sanding another papier-mâché face. “It’s their skin. It motivates all of the physical life of a character. You don’t want to get the sense that there’s a person under that mask, you want to get the sense that the mask is that person.” In the years since he arrived in Philly in 1995, Cromie has transformed himself and others into countless whimsical personae: the Russian witch and tormented villagers of The Foocy, the glaring, fanged beast of Carlo Gozzi’s The Blue Monster, a mob of towering grotesques for Roald Dahl’s The BFG. Next Thursday, as part of the biennial Puppet Festival (r)Evolution in Swarthmore, he’ll teach a workshop called “Creating Character Through Multiple Masks” using the glowering creations currently massed on the table in front of him. The tradition of telling stories with masks dates back, Cromie shrugs, “to campfires and cavemen, I guess. Every single culture has their own trajectory toward the different dramatic figures, comedic figures, trickster figures. Each culture has found its own way to masks and to puppets as avatars for their own creativity and expression and traditions of storytelling or just expressing their belief systems.” Cromie came to masks and puppets via a circuitous route, beginning as a music major at the College of New Jersey, where “my interaction with objects was very formal. I played the trumpet and the trombone, so I was learning how to literally manipulate an object to artistically express oneself.” He came to Philly as an acting apprentice at the Walnut Street Theatre before working at the Lantern and Arden theaters. But as with so many local puppet makers, it was through the late, lamented Mum Puppettheatre and its founder, Robert Smythe, that he discovered his passion. “I consider Robert a grandfather of puppetry in this town,” Cromie says. “That will make him groan, but I learned things from him that I’ve brought into my own art, and now I’m starting to teach my own students who are going out into the world themselves.”

SORT of connection and continuity that Smythe hopes to foster by bringing Puppet Festival (r)Evolution to Swarthmore College, where hundreds of artists from across the country will converge beginning Monday for six days of performances, workshops, community events and old-fashioned networking on and off campus (see sidebar on the following page for festival information and highlights). The festival is sponsored by the Puppeteers of America, which was founded in 1937 to bolster puppets’ rep as a legitimate art form. During Mum’s 23-year lifespan, Robert Smythe accomplished just that in Philadelphia. “By the time Mum closed, we had pretty much achieved my idea of our mission statement, which was to get puppets on every stage in Philadelphia,” Smythe says. “That’s a testament to two things: One, I rarely take no for an answer, but also that the world of theater is changing, and where puppets were once seen as this exotic, even creepy, thing that people didn’t understand, now puppetry is seen as a theatrical technique that enables things to happen onstage that couldn’t happen otherwise.” Smythe recognizes that Mum was so synonymous with puppetry in this city that its closing meant for many that the art form was dead here. He argues against that misperception, pointing to artists like Cromie and Sebastienne Mundheim and to groups like Spiral Q and Berserker Residents as keepers of the flame. He hopes that the festival’s spotlight helps to open people’s minds. “I would love it if people see these examples of what can happen with puppets and performance,” Smythe says, “and as artists start to rethink the possibilities of their own work, or as audience members start demanding that the work that they see on stage expand its horizons to include the other kinds of storytelling and forms that puppetry enables to happen.” The wide variety of approaches that will be on display, Smythe says, will help broaden people’s perception of what puppetry means. As he points out, “Puppetry is breaking out of this idea that it’s only one thing. And depending on how old you are, that one thing is different things. For people who are really old, it’s Howdy Doody. For another generation, it’s Jim Henson. Now it could be Avenue Q or Being John Malkovich.” Puppetry, he points out, has a long history in the city. “The first recorded performance of a European puppet show in North America took place in Philadelphia in 1742,” he rattles off. “More than likely in an inn on South Street.” And the inventiveness of puppetry in its various forms is a perfect fit for Philly’s theater community, which celebrates the nontraditional approaches of companies like Pig Iron and New Paradise Laboratories. “Philadelphia is known around the country, if not the world, as being a place that develops new work in ways other than starting with a playwright,” Smythe says. “And puppetry goes hand in glove — or hand in puppet — with the ability to create work that is imagined in other ways than with words on a page.”

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CROMIE HAS studied commedia dell’arte, masks and puppetry,


The Puppet Festival (r)Evolution features performances, talks and workshops, many of which are family-friendly. Here are a few festival highlights taking place at Swarthmore College:



Mississippi-based Red String Wayang Theatre uses traditional Indonesian-style shadow puppetry to explore the civil-rights struggle in Jim Crow America. (Thu-Fri, Aug. 8-9, 1:30 p.m., $12, Frear Theatre)



A documentary about Wayne White, the irreverent artist responsible for the design of Pee-wee’s Playhouse and Beakman’s World and videos for Peter Gabriel and the Smashing Pumpkins. The lm captures White’s story through his one-man show. White will conduct a Q&A session after the screening. (Wed, Aug. 7, 8 p.m., $15, Pearson Hall Theater)

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Heather Henson, youngest daughter of the legendary Muppets creator and puppetry advocate, creates an environmentally themed outdoor performance with ying, kitelike puppets. (Sat., Aug. 10, 3 p.m., free, college campus lawn)



The founder of the People’s Puppets of Occupy Wall Street relates his journey from apathy to activism, as he tries to change the world “one puppet at a time.” (Tue., Aug. 6, 1:30 p.m., $12, Cornell 101)



Izumi Ashizawa spins a quartet of Japanese ghost stories through a combination of physical theater, storytelling and unconventional object manipulation. (Tue.-Wed., Aug. 6-7, 1:30 p.m., $12, Troy Dance Lab)

clowning, mime and physical theater in the States, Italy and Paris. But he gives equal credit to the inspiration of “a lot of walking down the aisles of Home Depot and Lowe’s looking for parts to make puppet things.” He is currently passing that creativity along to the next generation of artists at Drexel, where this fall he’ll work with students on a Japanese play about a love affair between Godzilla and a human girl, and as an adjunct associate professor of theater at UArts, where he will teach pre-college students about mask-making and performance through an adaptation of Akira Kurosawa’s Rashomon. At his festival workshop next week, Cromie will help actors find ways to communicate emotion and character through physical means while their faces are covered by masks: “Sometimes a mask can do one thing really well and that’s all it can do, and sometimes a mask has a whole number of expressions that can come out depending on who the performer is. This workshop will give them a chance to find different approaches to creating a physical character. Training in the mask allows the actor to make bigger, fuller, grander choices. Subtlety is on a grander scale.” Earlier this year, Cromie directed an entirely unmasked, flesh-andblood cast in the wrestling-themed American Sligo for New City Stage Company. He points to that show as one example of how his own career has flourished even in the absence of Mum. “I wish [Mum] was still here because I know that we’d be making other amazing pieces for people to come and see,” he says, “but ultimately things have to be born out of the ashes. I went from being a musician to being an actor to being a puppet maker and now I’m a director and a writer, so this world has allowed my imagination to go pretty crazy.” Cromie has no plans to abandon masks and puppets for actors requiring manipulation by less physical means. At this year’s FringeArts festival, he’ll team with his partner in life and on stage, Mary Tuomanen, to explore the story of Joan of Arc in their new play Saint Joan, Betrayed, which involves both toy theater and mask work. They hope to eventually tour the piece to theaters and classrooms. “We always hear the grand, romantic story of Joan of Arc,” he explains, “but we’re also interested in hearing what the soldiers and the people around her were going through so that we can examine when the usefulness of a symbol runs out — and how people react to that.” The masks arrayed at UArts immediately evoke ancient Greek theater, but Cromie argues that there is an advantage to such a classic form in our modern, high-tech age. “It’s always relevant when you put people in a room and they react to stuff,” he says. “In Greek times, the masks and machinery that they would use would blow people away. Conversely, we’re in this world where there’s so much technology — film, television and whatnot — where it’s easy to see things explode or have a totally wicked dragon flying around burning people up. But when you put people in a room with something tangible like this, there’s a chemical event that happens.” He pauses, then adds, “It’s a different kind of food. It’s like walking outside and getting vitamins from the sun: You get a different kind of soul-filling vitamins from this kind of thing.” (


+ THE PUPPET FESTIVAL (R)EVOLUTION, Aug. 5-10, various locations in Swarthmore, 267-240-3679,


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icepack By A.D. Amorosi

³ LOVING THE MOB is as patriotic a pastime as baseball and sequestration. That’s why I leapt forkfirst into a pasta-and-red-wine dinner with former Colombo and Gambino associate Sal Polisi and one-time Colombo capo Michael Franzese— stars of the National Geographic Channel’s new Inside the American Mob docu-series — at Dante & Luigi’s in South Philly the other night. When they weren’t noshing on manicotti and chicken parm, the pair dished the dirt (or ladled the gravy) on the fall of La Cosa Nostra from its ’70s peak to its rat-infested present, and laughed about the funnier elements of some of their schemes. (Franzese had a film production company that just happened to make money with B-movie fare like Savage Streets.) While the six-week series focuses on New York City’s five families, the upcoming Aug. 4 episode explores the Big Apple’s relationship with Philly after Angelo Bruno was assassinated in 1980. “He was kind of quiet,” Polisi says of Bruno, the so-called Docile Don.“We thought the Philly mob was a bunch of farmers, really, until [bloodthirsty Nicodemo] Scarfo showed up. Then things heated up.” Look for the Philly Mob episode to feature Inquirer scribe George Anastasia and witness-protected Phil Leonetti. Badda-bing. ³ Stick a fork into Fork, Etc. Well, it’s not done, but those real close to the Ellen Yin-owned/Eli Kulp chef-ed Old City restaubar hint that Etc. is getting a groovy face lift, inside and outside, and will become a separate eatery (from its grand, delish next-door-neighboring Fork) focusing on pasta and lite-bites. ³ So I’m talking to famed, one-time PAFA student/filmmaker/musician David Lynch about his exquisite new blues album, The Big Dream, and I ask him why, last year, he made a pit stop in Philly for a minute, even stopping by the London Grill.“The primary reason I was in Philadelphia was to talk to the Pennsylvania Academy of the Fine Arts about an upcoming show of paintings,” says Lynch. “I also wanted to show my wife where I used to live, went to school — the neighborhoods and all that.” Look for a show of Lynch’s macabre abstract masterpieces next year. ³ Several weeks ago, I ran into brand-building producer/Hashtag Multimedia CEO Craig Kaplan attheAmadou & Mariamshow at World Cafe Live. He’d never witnessed the blind, Malian music-making-marrieds in concert, but was immediately drawn to their emotional content and complex psychedelic sound. Upon hearing that two filmmakers were in serious lack of funding for their The Magic Couple documentary on Amadou & Mariam, Kaplan agreed to be the film’s producer. He’s flying to A&M’s Paris shows this week and has started a Kickstarter so you can help. ³ Icepack gets illustrated every Thursday at (

IN ON THE GROUND FLOOR: Jo Anna Van Thuyne — aka Jo Pincushion of The Pincushion podcast — helped organize Podfest. JUSTIN WALSH

[ podcasting ]

’CAST OF CHARACTERS Geeks meet sex at this weekend’s Philadelphia Podcast Festival. By Patrick Rapa


eople are confused by the amount of work I do for absolutely no money, but I know that if I work hard enough, I can have a profitable show that I produce — and own,” says Jo Anna Van Thuyne, aka Jo Pincushion. She spends about 10 hours a week recording and producing her podcast, The Pincushion. “That’s the great thing about independent media: You can start from nothing and all of a sudden have something great. It’s the cyber American Dream.” Van Thuyne — who describes The Pincushion as “an unapologetic stab at male-dominated subject matter like gaming, politics and porn” but also deals with music and general pop-culture geekiness — will link up with those who share her dream at this weekend’s Philadelphia Podcast Festival, Aug. 1 to 3. She’s one of the organizers, as is Nathan Kuruna, who says they strove to put together a diverse lineup and were surprised at just how many Philly podcasters there were. “It was really fantastic when word started to get out that this was a thing that was happening, and other podcasts started coming out of the woodwork saying, ‘Hey, how can we get in on this?’” he says. All told, they’ve enlisted 12 locally based shows to participate in what they hope will be an annual event. “You’re going to find comedy but also storytelling, sex advice, theater, news — maybe some sword-

fighting? Fingers crossed,” says Karuna. That last bit’s a reference to the Game of Thrones costume contest being hosted by the makers of the Stark Raven Mad podcast. In addition to a workshop and panel led by Van Thuyne at PhillyCAM on Friday afternoon, there will be two live podcast tapings at PhilaMOCA on each of Podfest’s three evenings. Each one pairs up like-minded shows, in the spirit of cross-pollination. The makers of story-collecting podcasters StoryShuffle will join forces with the comics from the well-named Comedy, Food, Sports; the jokers from Podcheese will geek out with the dudes from Talking Nerdy; and so on. As you might imagine, while these podcasters have a lot in common, there’s relatively little opportunity for interaction. Podfest is a chance for people who usually record their shows in their kitchens and garages to meet their peers and listeners. “We hope the [festival] will open the floodgates and lead to collaboration,” says Van Thuyne. “I think all podcasters understand one another. We know podcasts take a lot of work. We’re also passionate about what we’re talking about.” Beyond that, she says, kindred-spirit podcasters do sometimes find each other. She and podcaster Timaree Schmit, of Sex with Timaree, have made guest appearances on each others’ shows. “Being a part of independent media feels awesome,” says Schmit, an adjunct professor at Widener with a Ph.D. in human sexuality education. “We may have to work a lot harder to reach a percentage of the audience of a Clear Channel show, but we have full

“We have full autonomy and no limits.”

>>> continued on page 24

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[ with stomach-turning verisimilitude ] ³ country

Chi-town dronemeisters Bitchin Bajas shred righteously through the heart of the gooey, synth-y unfurlery pervading the expansive opening cut (“Transcendence,” natch) on Bitchitronics (Drag City). Later, it’s flutes and Frippertronics on “Inclusion,” tambura-esque Alice Coltrane hat-tips on “Turiya” and less discernible shoals of cosmic resonance. This isn’t the pure-minded, chin-stroking beauty of your typical ambient clinicians; these cats take a full-throttle approach to spiritual surrender and serenity. —K. Ross Hoffman

“When you’re tired of foolin’ round with two or three, come on home and fool around with me.” That’s classic Buck Owens — and that’s how Vince Gill and Paul Franklin roll on their new Bakersfield (MCA Nashville), alternating Owens and Merle Haggard hits. Both of those defiant country legends knew who they were and proudly blew off the “country-politan” vibe the suits were pushing. People who already resonate to the pure sorrow in these songs will thrill to Gill’s singing and the subtle sound of heartache, evenly answered —Mary Armstrong by Franklin’s weeping pedal steel.

³ experimental Jazzers by background and instrumentation — upright bass, piano and drums — Brooklyn trio Dawn of Midi is really more like a group of avant-garde minimalists with mind-bending chops. Their music, with its metronomic lock-grooves and precise builds, feels more like an acoustic transposition of abstract, mechanistic techno. Throughout the continuous nine-part suite comprising Dysnomia (Thirsty Ear), the tension ratchets up from crisp Reichian calm to —K. Ross Hoffman ominous, palpable agitation.


³ rock/pop Stuart McLamb showed himself to be a resourceful maker of guitar-pop on The Love Language’s 2009 debut, overcoming a low budget with nuance and catchiness. He hardly faced the same restrictions on the band’s third LP, Ruby Red (Merge); some 20 musicians were enlisted over a three-year span to push Love Language into a more listener-friendly realm. But the weighty production causes the tracks to bleed together as one long toe-tapper that may leave your legs weary. Underneath all the layers, there are some standouts: “Calm Down” sounds like The Shins doing jam, while “Hi Life” is tastefully ambitious. —Matt Schickling

[ movie review ]


Mass murder lives on in memory.

LET’S BEGIN Welcome to City Paper’s newest column, offering news and views on the global hip-hop movement with a special focus on the fertile and dynamic Philly scene.

You gotta be on point and actually know the lyrics. ³ AS IF THE summer of 2013 couldn’t get any

weirder or more awesome, legendary Philly DJ/ producer/impresario King Britt will be presenting a live audio/visual remix of John Sayles’ 1984 Afrofuturist cult classic Brother from Another Planet as a part of the BlackStar Film Festival. Britt and friends do the music while visual artist Jason Senk rearranges the film’s sequencing — all 100 percent improvised. (For more, see Agenda, p. 29.) Fri., Aug. 2, Johnny Brenda’s. Rap + karaoke = the best idea ever, right? Put those endless hours of watching Yo! MTV Raps to good use in front of the raucous crowd at HipHop Karaoke, hosted by MC Elixir.This ain’t your drunk uncle’s karaoke, though. You gotta be on point and actually know the lyrics. No prompters. No screens. Just two turntables and a microphone. Pre-register: Sun., Aug. 4, The M Room. Hip-hop and spoken-word pioneers The Last Poets will be rocking The Blockley as a part of the PSA monthly concert series. All proceeds fund a feature-length documentary on the life of former Black Panther and current U.S. political prisoner Russell Maroon Shoatz. Sun., Aug. 4, The Blockley. In response to the issues facing the city’s youth, The Hip-Hop Party for the People is organizing the second annual Philly Stand Up! “The Take Over” Youth Parade.The parade will feature performances by artists, musicians, drummers and youth dance groups. Sat., Aug. 17, starts 11 a.m. at Love Park, ends at Broad and Erie streets. Rounding out the summer: Theatre in the X is staging Amiri Baraka’s classic experimental play A Black Mass,originally performed in the ’60s, with a score from the Sun Ra Arkestra.One of the show’s curators/performers is rapper/actor Carlo Campbell, aka Afloe. Sun., Aug. 25, Malcolm X Park. I just got word from my man DJ Duiji 13 that there will be some extra-special-surprise dopeness on deck for the Aug. 29 edition of The Gathering — Philly’s longest-running monthly hip-hop event — so I’ll definitely be in the house. Last Thursday of every month, The Rotunda. Peace and love till next time. (


RETURN OF THE REPRESSED: Given cameras by the director, Indonesian death-squad leaders make their own movies about the era of widespread killings.

John Morrison on hip-hop

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[ A- ] A profoundly unsettling work of investigative cinéma vérité, Joshua Oppenheimer’s The Act of Killing retells Indonesia’s bloody anti-Communist purges through the eyes of their perpetrators. After the military coup of 1965, “Communist” was used as a catchall term for intellectuals, dissidents and anyone in the wrong place at the wrong time. Given that there are no accurate records of the slaughters and the political heirs of those who ordered and carried it out remain in power, there’s never been any kind of reckoning. Almost half a century later, the paramilitary Pancasila Youth hold open rallies where they talk about cracking the heads of those who oppose them. It’s not hard for Oppenheimer to get his subjects to talk openly about their deeds since there’s scant chance they’ll ever pay a price for them, but coming to terms with them is something else entirely. Working along with a native co-director who remains anonymous for fear of political reprisal, Oppenheimer offers the killers a chance to stage their own scenarios: in essence, to make their own movies. Some create realistic tableaux, playing the parts of quivering victims with stomachturning verisimilitude; others create gauzy, Bollywood-style spectacle; some take inspiration from the cavalier violence of American action movies, which they say helped inspire their methods. The Act of Killing challenges the post-Shoah orthodoxy of how documentaries approach historical atrocity, clearly playing with fire: The idea of giving murderers rather than survivors the mic is appalling, although Oppenheimer isn’t simply staging a “provocative” stunt. As much as The Act of Killing is about its individual subjects, it’s about how mass murder lives on in a nation’s collective memory, especially when that memory is allowed to follow its own festering course. The movie is very nearly obscene itself, but it takes that risk in the name of exposing depravity — a tremendous gamble that is very much worth the risk. —Sam Adams


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³ drone/psych


[ disc-o-scope ]

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✚ ’Cast of Characters <<< continued from page 22

autonomy and no limits.” No limits means total creative control: no deadlines, no time constraints, no poorly timed commercial breaks, no agenda but her own. “I have no pressure to shape the message to please advertisers, corporate ownership or editors’ preferences,” she says. “And because it’s the Internet, not radio, we can cuss. Having once written for newspapers, it’s wildly liberating.” The trick is finding your audience. Schmit, who was already making a name for herself as a syndicated sex-advice columnist before she got into podcasting, received a nice little bump in the beginning from iTunes’s Top 5 New and Noteworthy section. Later, Daily Dot listed the show alongside superstar sex columnist Dan Savage, so that helped. “Anyone searching for ‘sex’ on iTunes will find us,” says Schmit. “Other than that, it’s a matter of grinding away at my website, Twitter, Facebook and workshops, and collaborating and cross-promoting with my guests. I share their work with my listeners, they share the interview and introduce me to their audience.” Her recent chat with semi-famous New York City “topless-rights activist” Moira Johnston led to a “lovely little uptick” in downloads, Schmit says. “That kind of mini-viraldom happens every few months. Ultimately, it’s about people who agree with sex positivism who spread the word to their friends that this show might be of interest.”

[ arts & entertainment ]

Timaree Schmit

So far Sex With Timaree numbers 122 episodes and counting. “I was the first interview that the inventor of the Semenette did. It’s a sex toy that can be used during insemination. It’s kind of blown up among the lesbian moms-to-be crowd, and it was a real honor to get in on the ground floor with that.” ( ✚ Thu.-Sat., Aug. 1-3, 7:30 and 9:30

p.m., $12 per show, $18 per evening, $50 per all-festival pass, PhilaMOCA, 531 N. 12th St., 267-519-9651,


*No purchase necessary. Void where prohibited or restricted by law. Employees of PROMO PARTNER, Tri-Star Pictures and their immediate families are not eligible. Please refer to screening passes for additional restrictions.


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Philly. Submit snapshots of the City of Brotherly Love, however you see it, at:

2 Guns

✚ NEW 2 GUNS See Drew Lazor’s review at (Wide release)

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THE ACT OF KILLING Read Sam Adams’ review on p. 23. (Ritz East)

STILL MINE A haiku: Nice old folks battle bureaucrats in Canada’s version of Amour. (Not reviewed) (Ritz at the Bourse)

✚ CONTINUING BLACKFISH | B+ Although it includes scenes of aquatic-park trainers being mauled by orcas, the hardest footage to watch in Gabriela Cowperthwaite’s damning documentary is of the harm done to the whales themselves. Removed from their natural environment and often kept overnight in pens that amount to isolation tanks, the orcas take their frustrations out on themselves or on other whales, who wind up with hides crisscrossed with scars. Blackfish is structured as a murder investigation, beginning with the death of Sea World trainer Dawn Brancheau then tracing the life of her killer, a 12,000-pound male orca named Tilikum. The park’s management doesn’t give their side, but former trainers paint a bleak picture of the orcas’ existence, and of their own naiveté. By their own accounts, the trainers didn’t come to

their jobs with much knowledge; what they knew was what they were told, and they swallowed the company’s story hook, line and sinker. Since the trainers are on camera, they’re more sympathetic, but there’s still plenty of blame to go around. —Sam Adams (Ritz Five)

THE CONJURING | B Inspired by a real-life account from paranormal investigators Ed and Lorraine Warren (Patrick Wilson and Vera Farmiga), James Wan’s The Conjuring is staged in the most American of all terror settings: a rickety home in rural Rhode Island, recently occupied by blue-collar couple Roger and Carolyn Perron (Ron Livingston and Lili Taylor) and their five daughters. It’s these youngsters who really ignite Wan’s simple, startling strategies, from hey-who’s-there figures lurking behind heavy doors to apparitions inviting themselves to play in games of hide-and-seek. Jaded audiences can watch comely dummy adults get slaughtered for two hours without blinking, but push a few unsullied kids into the mix and the threat of innocence corrupted by the arcane disturbs the peace. Wan gets a little too ahead of himself at points, jumbling the Warren and Perron storylines in a tangle that acts as a finger on the metronome. But the director’s proven that he’s a top-tier architect of mischievous old-school scare tactics. —Drew Lazor (Wide release) FRUITVALE STATION | BWith the sting of Trayvon Martin’s death still lingering, another story of a young African-American man’s life cut short by a bullet is retold. In the early hours of New Year’s Day 2009, Oscar Grant was killed by a transit cop on an Oakland subway platform, unarmed and lying face down. In Ryan Coogler’s film we see Grant, affectingly played by Michael B. Jordan, repeatedly taking steps to turn his life


Bruce Willis returns as ex-CIA agent Frank Moses, along with John Malkovich as his paranoid ex-partner and Helen Mirren as their cold-blooded MI6 counterpart. This go-round tosses in several characters who share pitch-room simple pasts with Frank: Anthony Hopkins as a batty, long-imprisoned nuclear scientist, Byung-hun Lee as a skilled contract killer and Catherine Zeta-Jones as Frank’s Russian ex. Everyone is game, especially Mirren, who so energizes her scenes that she suggests she could have made a convincing female Bond. But she and Malkovich, the highlights of both films, are relegated to the background so that the simultaneously trite and overcomplicated plot can send the cast shuttling around in search of whatever. Instead of simply letting a bunch of vets chew scenery and fight bad guys, Red 2 piles on the car chases and fisticuffs, lacking the wit to make them as thrilling or fun as Malkovich’s reaction shots. —SB (Wide release)

✚ THE AWESOME FEST BALCONY AT THE TROC 1003 Arch St., 215-922-6888, Cruising (1980, U.S., 102


LIBERTY LANDS 926 N. American St., Howard the Duck (1986, U.S., 110 min.): Yeah, yeah, yeah. The movie’s great. But seriously, how fun would a planet of ducks be? Fri., Aug. 2, 9 p.m., free.

3701 Chestnut St., 215-387-5125, BlackStar Film Festival: Screening indie films with an international scope, it’s no wonder Ebony calls the fest “The Black Sundance.” Thu.-Sun., Aug. 1-4. For more details, visit The Woman with the 5 Elephants (2009, Switzerland/Germany, 93 min.): Sixty-five years after leaving Kiev, a renowned Dostoyevsky translator returns to a much-changed city. Tue., Aug. 6, 7 p.m., free. Contextualizing Jazz in Philadelphia: An Evening of Documentaries: Featuring Coltrane’s Philadelphia (2013, U.S., 25 min.) and Sun Ra: A Joyful Noise (1980, U.S., 60 min.). Wed., Aug. 7, 7 p.m., free.

400 Ranstead St., 215-440-1181, Space Jam (1996, U.S., 88 min.): Let’s be honest, all of our moms made us drinks and called them MJ’s “secret stuff.” Fri., Aug. 2, midnight, $10.

THE TRESTLE INN 399 N. 11th St., 267-239-0290, Tonite Let’s All Make Love in London (1967, U.K., 70 min.): Cultural shifts in 1960s London as described by Mick Jagger, Pink Floyd and others paired with a whisky tasting. Thu., Aug. 1, 5 p.m., $40.

TROCADERO THEATRE 1003 Arch St., 215-922-6888, thetroc. com. At Fest (2013, U.S., 81 min.): A slice-of-life documentary on the Philadelphia Folk Festival should get you psyched for the upcoming hootenanny. With special musical guests Matt Baldwin and Colin Reeves of HogMaw. Wed., Aug. 7, 8 p.m., $10.

PHILAMOCA PARX CASINO Picnic Grove, 2999 Street Rd., Bensalem, 888-588-7279, Rocky III (1982, U.S., 99 min.): As long as it’s not the fifth one, you really can’t go wrong with Rocky. Sat., Aug. 3, 8 p.m., free. Conan the Barbarian (1982, U.S., 129 min.): It’s actually not a stupid Arnold-muscle-movie. INSTEAD IT’S PRETTY BADASS. Sat., Aug. 3, 11 p.m., free.

✚ REPERTORY FILM AMBLER THEATER 108 E. Butler Ave., Ambler, 215-3457855, Safety Last (1923, U.S., 70 min.): No one will hear you scream when you’re dangling from a clock tower. Thu., Aug. 1, 7 p.m., $9.75. Thunderball (1965, U.K., 130 min.): Number 4 of 23. Wed., Aug 7, 7 p.m., $9.75.

BRYN MAWR FILM INSTITUTE 824 W. Lancaster Ave., Bryn Mawr, 610-527-9898, To Kill a Mockingbird (1962, U.S., 129 min.): Peck has a mean shot. Sat., Aug. 3, 11 a.m., $5. Funny Girl (1968, U.S., 151 min.): Join BMFI for a sing-along version of this classic. Free popcorn if you dress in costume. Tue., Aug. 6, 7 p.m., $10.50.

531 N. 12th St., 215-387-5125, VHS Extravaganza: Trade tapes with fellow fanatics and then catch screenings of Adjust Your Tracking (2013, U.S., 84 min.), a doc on VHS collectors, and Hellroller (1992, U.S., 72 min.), a shot-on-video horror flick about a maniacal serial killer in a wheelchair. Mon., Aug. 5, 5 p.m., $10. Summer Time Machine Blues (2005, Japan, 107 min.): If you spill a Coke on your air conditioner’s

More on: ✚ CHECK OUT MORE R E P E R T O R Y F I L M L I S T I N G S AT C I T Y PA P E R . N E T / R E P F I L M .


A delirious throwback to Pedro Almodóvar’s high-farcical period, I’m So Excited! is a garish, rude and

RED 2 | C


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tight restraint here, focusing on Lucas as he grasps desperately at normalcy while overcome with despair. But Vinterberg offers little else beyond this central embodiment of suffering; the accusation’s easy acceptance in Lucas’ tight-knit community is evidence of the hysteria surrounding the mere mention of child abuse but it’s also a too-neat display of villainy. It’s all angry glares and snarled threats, lacking the subtlety that could more thoughtfully surround Mikkelsen’s powerful central performance. —SB (Ritz East)

design and a wicked, wacky sense of humor. Although I’m So Excited! isn’t the equal of The Skin I Live In or All About My Mother, it’s not meant to be. It’s Almodóvar fooling around, taking a genre and a new technology for a spin. But he’s still a master at the height of his craft, and even his diversions have merit. —SA (Ritz East)

remote control, you will create a time machine. Wed., Aug. 7, 7:30 p.m., free.

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32nd Street and Powelton Avenue, Batman (1989, U.S., 126 min.): We all agree that Jack Nicholson acts like this in real life, right? Thu., Aug. 1, 9 p.m., free.

[ movie shorts ]

227 Bridge St., Phoenixville, 610-9171228, 8 1/2 (1963, Italy/U.S., 138 min.): Because Fellini made eight-and-a-half films. Sun., Aug. 4, 2 p.m., $9.





20 E. State St., Doylestown, 215-3456789, Thunderball (1965, U.K., 130 min.): The reason why every film should include an underwater battle scene. Tue., Aug. 6, 7 p.m., $9.75.

James Franco’s recreation of those lost 40 minutes of Cruising.Thank God for The Franco. Mon., Aug. 5, 10 p.m., free.

tence on not blaming the victim. It’s not hard to imagine a nearly identical film with Trayvon Martin as its subject, but the tragedy in either case doesn’t require a saint to point out its horrifying finality. —Shaun Brady (Ritz Five)

It spoils nothing to reveal that Lucas, Mads Mikkelsen’s character in The Hunt, is entirely innocent of the childmolestation charges leveled against him. We see from the outset how Lucas, a laid-off Danish high school teacher now working in a kindergarten, affectionately wrestles with the children in his care; how he tenderly deflects the crush of one young girl; and how she angrily but innocently sets his downfall in motion. Despite teetering dangerously close to outrageous melodrama, the director Thomas Vinterberg exercises a

min.): Apparently, United Artists lost the 40 minutes the director cut to land an R rating for the film. Sons o’ bitches. Mon., Aug. 5, 8 p.m., free. Interior. Leather Bar (2013, U.S., 60 min.):


giddy delight. Set almost entirely in an airplane searching for a place to crashland, the movie charts the escalating tension between the queer-as-fuck flight attendants (Javier Cámara, Raúl Arévalo and an outrageous Carlos Areces) and their increasingly frantic first-class passengers. As tempers rise, the characters’ inhibitions drop, and their secrets come pouring out as if it’s last call. The straight-acting pilot reveals he’s bisexual, while his uptight co-pilot admits, “I tried to suck a dick once.” (It was worth a shot.) Mostly, though, the film is just a gas, full of tasty performances and eye-pleasing

the naked city | feature

around. Although the director does tentatively reveal less savory aspects of Grant’s personality, briefly showing Grant’s temper flaring during the day and flashing back to a prison stint, his restraint is palpable, a cautious insis-

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[ resolve it with a drink and straight talk ]

I HOPE THEY STILL MAKE THAT SHAMPOO I LIKE: The Melvins play Underground Arts tonight. JESSI ROSE

The Agenda is our selective guide to what’s going on in the city this week. For comprehensive event listings, visit

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Submit information by email ( to Caroline Russock or enter it yourself at with the following details: date, time, address of venue, telephone number and admission price. Incomplete submissions will not be considered, and listings information will not be accepted over the phone.


8.1 [ rock/pop ]

✚ MELVINS Even during those crazy years when every kid’s Christmas list included a flannel shirt and one-way ticket to Seattle, it would have been foolish to bet against the Melvins being the last band standing after 30 years. If slow and steady wins

the race, brutal and relentless means you just don’t have to worry about the competition. Buzz Osborne and Dale Crover, with their revolving cast of disposable bassists, steamrolled through ’80s metal and ’90s grunge armed with an armload of Kiss records, Buzzo’s towering, fern-like Afro and a wicked sense of humor. The latter often takes the form of befuddling, sneering self-sabotage, as when they seized their brief moment in the major-label spotlight by enlisting Kurt Cobain for an aimless 10-minute percussion ramble. They’re celebrating with the release of Everybody Loves Sausages (Ipecac), a cynically titled covers record featuring the expected (Venom’s “Warhead”), the surprising (Divine’s title tune for John Waters’ Female Trouble) and, well, Queen’s “You’re My Best Friend”? Why the fuck not? —Shaun Brady Thu., Aug. 1, 9 p.m., $20, with Honky, Underground Arts, 1200 Callowhill St.,

[ theater ]

✚ GAYFEST! Sara Pappalardo’s Cold and Philip Dawkins’ The Homosexuals play in rep to launch Quince Productions’ third annual GayFest! In the world premiere of Cold, directed by William Steinberger, a woman holds a gun to her own head in an empty lesbian dive, but her partner, a young trans man, has other plans. Meanwhile, Dawkins — who wrote Azuka’s season-closing hit Failure: A Love Story — unspools a young man’s journey of self-discovery in reverse chronological order, directed by Sarah J. Gafgen. This year expanding to three venues, GayFest! features two more full-length plays as well as 10 “One Night Stand” performances of comedy, drama and music. Artistic director Rich Rubin is also continuing the GayFest! tradition of supporting new plays though readings, scheduled at brunch

and happy hour at Tabu. —Mark Cofta Through Aug. 24, $20-$25, Plays & Players, 1714 Delancey St., 215-6270188,

[ rock/pop/psych ]

✚ DUCKTAILS Across countless cassette recordings and his first three full-lengths as Ducktails, Matthew Mondanile gradually weaned himself from offhand, chillwavey bedroom sketches toward more “proper,” conventionally presented indie-pop songs. The Flower Lane (Domino), his most populous, populist foray thus far (featuring, among other pals, full-band contributions from fellow Jerseyites Big Troubles), is easily the most emphatic manifestation of that trajectory. While brushing undeniably close to the sedate, suburban shimmer of the guitarist’s better-known “day job” band, Real Estate — one could easily imagine the jan-

gle-filled likes of “Ivy Covered House” or “Academy Avenue” among their property listings — it also ventures into frillier, colorful lite-pop and psych territory, scoping out some loose, chewy electric-piano space funk, patchouli-tinged sax solos and a couple of spiffy, retro-redolent boy-girl duets. —K. Ross Hoffman Thu., Aug. 1, 9:15 p.m., $12, with Hubble and Sgt. Quality, Johnny Brenda’s, 1201 N. Frankford Ave., 215739-9684,

[ art ]

✚ SPATIAL TRANSLATIONS Guinea pigs wanted. As part of the new “Spatial Translations” group exhibition at Drexel’s Westphal Gallery, you’ll be able to use your smartphone to delve into the artists’ inspiration and process that led to the works you’re looking at — in case interpreting the abstract isn’t your thing. Curated by Amber Lauletta, this col-

laboration between InLiquid and Drexel includes sculptures, drawings, large-scale installations and paintings by Annette Cords, William Cromar, Brent Crothers and Paul Fabozzi. The exhibit explores notions of individual experience within an urban setting ranging from emotional responses to 9/11 to drawings of walks through parks. —Jordyn Horowitz Opening reception Thu., Aug. 1, 6 p.m., free, exhibit through Sept. 18, Leonard Pearlstein Gallery, 3401 Filbert St., 215-895-2548,


8.2 [ rock/pop ]

✚ BELLS≥ Just how integral Zach Barocas was to the signature

Fri., Aug. 2, 7:30 p.m., $10, with Six Acre Lake, Kung Fu Necktie, 1250 N. Front St., 215-291-4919,

✚ PHILLYBLOCO Rio’s kind of a haul and your City of God DVD’s all scratched up, so how’re you gonna get your samba fix? PhillyBloco’s Summer Dance Party, that’s how. Inspired by the historic blocos of Rio Carnival — massive street bands with elaborate percussion sections and group vocals — the 20-strong PhillyBloco mixes samba with funk and reggae to create a bone-quaking polyrhythmic assault. Their January performance at World Cafe Live sold out quick, so Friday’s your sweet second chance. —Sameer Rao Fri., Aug. 2, 9 p.m., $15, World Café Live, 3025 Walnut St., 215-222-1400,

[ film remix/live music ]

✚ THE BROTHER FROM ANOTHER PLANET As part of this weekend’s BlackStar Film Festival, a group of Philly-based musi-

cians, led by producer/DJ King Britt, will create their own unique spin on a woefully underappreciated film. Written and directed by John Sayles,

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—Shaun Brady

[ the agenda ]

the agenda

former band’s rhythmic shifts and dynamic juxtapositions. Too jangly to be math rock, too precise and intricate to be pop, the band fuses lyricism with intensity, crushing with catchy. Barocas is undoubtedly the driving force, though the dual guitar and cello frontline adds a graceful lilt to even his most pounding grooves.

[ samba/fusion ]

the naked city | feature | a&e

sound of Jawbox is evident on Solutions, Silence, or Affirmations (Dischord), the latest from his instrumental project BELLS≥. Produced by Jawbox singer/guitarist J. Robbins, who also plays bass on the record (though not live), the album maintains their

the 1984 sci-fi satire The Brother from Another Planet follows a mute, telekinetic alien slave who escapes his captors and crash-lands on Earth. Despite his three-toed feet, the Brother (Joe Morton) looks like an African-American human; he’s pursued by sinister agents while traversing the urban, alien landscape of then-modern Harlem. Video artist Jason Senk will remix the movie in real time as the crew of musicians performs an improvised score, turning a cult classic into

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amusebouche By Adam Erace

Bay Side HOOKED UP SEAFOOD | 1044 W. Rio Grande Ave., Wildwood, N.J., 609-522-2722, hookedupseafood. com. Hours: Daily mid-June through Labor Day, weekends through Sept. 15, 11:30 a.m.-9 p.m. Appetizers, $4-$10; sandwiches, $2.50-$9; entrees, $14-$24.

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➤ “We kill it, we grill it” is the motto at Hooked

Up Seafood, a no-frills kitchen trailer parked on cinder blocks next to a parasailing outfit on the long, low-lying road into Wildwood, N.J. A neat row of picnic tables with blue tops, red seats and green Heineken-branded umbrellas sits out back along the rickety docks that rise … and fall, rise … and fall like the chest of some slumbering dinosaur. Locals in beach-patrol hoodies scrub Old Bay from their fingernails at a pedal-powered outside sink. It’s tricky business operating the hot and cold water with your feet, but by my second visit, I’ve somewhat got the hang of it. Hooked Up is just the kind of place people like me hunt for on summer vacation: fresh, simply cooked seafood enhanced by the salt-laced air and the sense that you’ve made a special discovery. I haven’t, of course. Hooked Up is currently in its fourth summer, opened by Maria Mallett, fisherman Bill Bright, his wife, Michelle (who runs the kitchen) and his four kids, Tess, Sara, Sam and Will. Bright captains the boat, Defiance, long-lining for tuna, swordfish and mahi 80 to 100 miles off the coast. This time of year, he fishes a week or two at a time, traveling as far south as the Carolinas and as far north as New England, and the catch he brings home to Cape May is butchered right on the docks where Hooked Up resides. I went early one night, straight from the beach, rinsed the sand off my hands with my feet and dug into a bowl of tender, steamed peel-and-eats. Mahi was on special, beneath a bark of blackening spice, a pair of pristine fillets with a cup of mango salsa and two sides: leaves of romaine painted in creamy Caesar dressing and sautéed zucchini. Meaty, sweet and briny littleneck clams raised by Bright’s uncle improved a thin, milky New England chowder. They also appeared steamed, their gray shells collecting an awesomely potent garlic-butter broth flecked with fresh parsley. (Ask for extra split-and-griddled garlic rolls for dunking.) Piled on a haystack of fries, planks of flounder followed in crisp, greaseless jackets worthy of an English pub. A pouch of foil held corn on the cob sweet as candy. The sunset was complimentary. (

Market Watch: Marcie turney and Sara May soaking up some inspiration at claudio’s. JessiCa KourKounis

[ opening ]

Red GRavy TRain Little Nonna’s, the latest venture from Marcie Turney and Valerie Safran, embraces Philadelphia’s love for Italian-American fare. By Caroline Russock


ith vintage tableware, tea candles in votives and tumblers for Chianti, the decor of Little Nonna’s (set to debut at the end of the month at 1234 Locust street) conjures up the coziness of a visit to grandma’s south Philly rowhouse for sunday supper. the back garden even has a clothesline strung with the eponymous Nonna’s More on: aprons, lace and linens — despite the fact that for restaurateurs Marcie turney and Valerie safran, “Nonna” is an idea rather than an actual person. Neither woman in the duo behind Barbuzzo, Jamonera and other gayborhood spots actually grew up with a gravy-stirring grandma. “I grew up eating spam,” laughs turney about her childhood in the Poconos. “My parents had about 10 different ways to prepare it.” so why Italian-American? the idea came to (candle-) light as turney and safran dined at Mr. Martino’s, an East Passyunk trattoria with a cult following. In a city where places like Mr. Martino’s still have loyal followings, it seemed a new-school-meets-old-school Italian-American spot could make a lot of sense. “We wanted to bring back that Italian-American restaurant of the ’50s, and do it with quality ingredients and respect for tradition,”

says turney. Note she said “Italian-American” — the difference between “Italian-American restaurant” and “Italian restaurant in America” is much more than just semantics, she says. these days, “Italian-American” can evoke fast-food bastardizations of old-country traditions: dry chicken cutlets or sub-par Italian hoagies. But Nonna’s embraces the cuisine’s deeper roots, says turney. “It came from the Italian immigrants of south Philly and lower Manhattan. these folks took their traditions and created these red-sauce recipes with inexpensive cuts of meat, tomatoes, mozzarella and pasta that were affordable and comforting.” the opening menu does expand a bit on tradition. take spaghetti and meatballs — tiny polpettini might appear in Puglia, but not softball-sized meatballs atop a pile of red-sauced pasta. While the aim is for grandma-style comfort, turney and more food and safran have enlisted some serious young drink coverage talent. sara May, whose dessert stylings at c i t y p a p e r . n e t / have spruced up Franklin Fountain, came to m e a lt i c k e t. Little Nonna’s via a fortuitous Craiglist ad. “You can’t get good spumoni anywhere in Philadelphia,” says May of the tri-colored ice cream. Her mission: to take the good-looking but not the best-tasting bakery staples and make them into more than just eye candy. the wine list will be all-Italian, though turney says there won’t be any straw-wrapped bottles of Chianti on view. Blue Blazer, a firm of Village Whiskey and Lemon Hill vets, is designing an Italianaccented cocktail program with mason-jar Negronis. When it’s nice out, you’ll be able to sip them out in the back garden, underneath the stars and Nonna’s aprons. (

the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda

[ food & drink ]



D A N YA H E N N I N G E R , I M A G I C D I G I T A L

By Carly Szkaradnik


Âł NOW SEATING Kermitâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Bake Shoppe | Adam Ritter is best known

so far for his bars â&#x20AC;&#x201D; he owns Sidecar Bar and Kraftwork â&#x20AC;&#x201D; but we suspect that from now on, his name will be synonymous with inventive pizzas and sweets. The newest addition to his lineup, which sits near the border of Grays Ferry and Point Breeze, is turning out slices and whole pies, with the option of a gluten-free crust. Chef Brian Lofink also put soups and salads on the menu, though youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have to take your feast to go or have it delivered (thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a bit of standing room available if you just want to scarf a slice). The rest of the menu reads like a pastry encyclopedia, offering everything from sweet and savory breads to housemade toaster pastries and candy bars from pastry chef Chad Durkin of TLCâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Next Great Baker fame. Open Mon.-Fri., 11 a.m.-11 p.m.; Sat.-Sun., 8 a.m.11 p.m., 2204 Washington Ave., 267-639-4267,



RyBrew | Fairmountâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s popular RyBread CafĂŠ has a new

Talulaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Daily | Aimee Olexyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s latest move is a casual,

takeout-friendly market and cafĂŠ right next to fine-dining draw Talulaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Garden. The two spaces share a seasonal sensibility and focus on high-quality, local ingredients. But with a four-course prix fixe menu available for only a small group of diners each night, the new space feels more closely tied to Talulaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Table, which started it all in Kennett Square. Breakfast and lunch options include baked goods, quiche, sandwiches and salads that will morph with the seasons. Sit down and sip a glass of wine with your meal, splurge on some special cheese to enjoy at home. Market and cafe open daily, 7 a.m.-7 p.m.; dinner Tue.-Sun., 7 p.m., 208 W. Washington Square, 215-5926555,


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Got A Tip? Please send restaurant news to or call 215-735-8444, ext. 207.

Â&#x2019;aS`dW\URW\\S`]\Zg P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | A U G U S T 1 - A U G U S T 7 , 2 0 1 3 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

sibling in Brewerytown â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a younger sibling thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s larger and legally allowed to drink, making the sibling analogy an ill fit, come to think of it. Expect a similar menu of salads and highly customizable sandwich options, plus a selection of baked goods and, of course, coffee. But this location offers more seating, a stay-in or takeout selection of more than 150 bottle beers and â&#x20AC;&#x201D; because why not? â&#x20AC;&#x201D; even a shuffleboard table. Open Mon.-Sat., 11 a.m.-8 p.m., 2816 W. Girard Ave., 215-763-1984,

the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city food classifieds

[ food & drink ]



2301 FAIRMOUNT AVE . 2 1 5 . 9 7 8 . 4 5 4 5

HOW WE DO IT: The restaurants, bars and markets listed in this section rotate every week and are compiled by City Paper editorial staff. If you have suggestions or corrections,email


Any time a decorated New York chef moves to Philly, you can expect a good dose of breathless anticipation. When word got out that the newest arrival was the chef who opened Momofuku Ko with David Chang, the Philly food scene was left gasping for air. After months spent ducking most of the hype, Peter Serpico opened the doors last month. Though undoubtedly stylish, the neighborhood-joint vibe comes through with chalkboard menus and bar seating overlooking an open kitchen. The menu includes plenty of approachable tastes like hand-torn pastas and lamb ribs, though not without some twists (try not to look surprised when your foie hits the table in powder form). Open Sun.-Thu., 5-11 p.m., Fri.-Sat., 5 p.m.-midnight, 604 South St., 215925-3001,


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In addition to the full-service restaurant, the AKA hotel on Rittenhouse Square has expanded its amenities to include a super-sleek bar in the former Kiehl’s space. With no hot kitchen on premises, the menu centers around small plates and is decidedly seafood-heavy, with the main attraction being a well-appointed raw bar. The wine list, courtesy of sommelier Tim Kweeder (also the architect of’s stellar roster), focuses on artisanal natural wines — and immediately ranks as one of the best in the city. Open daily, 3 p.m.-midnight, 135 S. 18th St., 215-825-7000,


This Fishtown spot is the follow-up to NoLibs’ A Full Plate Café, which closed late last year. The menu has an unmistakable Southern-comfort motif and seeks to welcome all comers — there’s chicken and waffles and a healthy dose of pork, sure, but with a strong complement of veggie-friendly dishes. The cocktail program offers a kale martini that’s as delicious as it is buzzworthy. 2370 E. Norris St., 215-423-5400,


The latest opening from Jason Evenchik (Growlers, Vintage) celebrates beer in cans and boardwalk vibes in the shell of a former body shop. The space has been kitted out with skeeball, pinball and pool tables (yes, the games spit out redeemable tickets) and an indoor lunch cart that will host a rotating cast of cooks from some of the city’s best-known food trucks. There’s also a generous “BYO cheesesteak” food policy, and if the list of cans numbering in the hundreds doesn’t do it for you, the bar offers a few drafts and a minimalist approach

to wine — you want red or white? Open daily, 5 p.m.-2 a.m., 1231 E. Passyunk Ave., 215-278-2429


The newest Café L’Aube has a pretty swank address, just steps off Rittenhouse Square. (NB: The easily missed entrance is on Locust.) L’Aube Torrefaction coffee is a draw, but the crepes are the real stars. Open weekdays, 7 a.m.-7 p.m., weekends, 8 a.m.-6 p.m., 222 W. Rittenhouse Square, 215-7723051,


Xi’an Famous Foods is a NYC brand with wide-ranging recognition — so if there was a bit of confusion when an unrelated Xi’an Famous Foods opened in Philly last month, it was understandable. The name was changed in no time, but the food remains the same, and it’s a welcome addition to the Chinatown scene. Cold liangpi noodles are a must-try; cumin-spiked “burgers” are another highlight. Open daily, 11 a.m.-10 p.m., 902 Arch St., 215-925-1688.


Reading Terminal recently gained this top-notch cheese shop from the Long Valley, N.J., sheep farm and creamery. They’re making some of the cheeses on-site, including clothbound cheddar, Stilton-style blue and fresh mozzarella they’re handstretching every day to provide a good show while you shop. On the takeout tip, chef Rebecca Foxman is serving up specialty grilledcheese sandwiches. Go simple with fresh mozzarella and roasted tomatoes on a baguette, or go for the gusto with the Valley Thunder, which marries cheddar, brisket and mac and chees. Any sandwich can be custom-grilled in duck or bacon fat, if you so choose. Open Mon.-Sat., 10 a.m.-6 p.m.; Sun., 10 a.m.- 5 p.m. Reading Terminal Market, 12th and Arch streets, 267639-3309,


The space that once housed Kris is now a part of Munish Narula’s growing empire. This latest iteration fills the midrange-BYOBshaped gap between the existing Tiffin locations and the very swank Tashan. Chef Kirti Pant has developed an affordable menu that mixes basics like saag paneer and chicken tikka with less-common entrees like lamb kolhapuri. Open Sun.Thu., 11:30 a.m.-10 p.m., Fri.-Sat., 11:30 a.m.-11 p.m., 1100 Federal St., 215-468-0104,

To place your FREE ad (100 word limit) ³ email ENJOY A LIFETIME OF BAD DECISIONS

“I am going to fall in love with you. You don’t have to love me back. I am going to give you my heart.” I would stand under your window with a radio indefinitely, or until you call the police. You know where to find me. Untamed heart sincerely struck by you, Waitress from the Women’s Way benefit concert.

I’ve learned that any Philly girl with blue hair, a septum piercing, and tattoos as ugly as you have are pretty much worthless as a potential partner. You’re a self centered, inconsiderate, and downright shitty person just like all the other blue hair tattooed wonders I made the mistake of dating. You told me how amazing I was, how I was the nicest guy you dated, the most understanding, and really good in bed. But you lost my most prized book without an apology, you disappeared on me for months without word, you were always late to dates, and then you stood me up during my art reception. You don’t deserve me. You deserve all of the horrible men that you will inevita-

CHEATING, LYING, SMUT Smut D. with a “Y” not an “I”. You spent the last year telling your group that our problems were my fault. This baffles me, because I took you back after you disappeared for a year and showed up on my door step. Then you fucked some other guy and lied about it after he told me. If you ever feel sorry and want to make amends, please just eat a bullet, there are plenty of bridges if you would rather do that. You deserve to die 4 killing my heart you nasty, fat, fake, STD littered liar.

I never came across someone so selfish in my life. And the fucked up part is that you really think that you are hurting dummy you are hurting our children unfortunately. But best believe when they get older I am going to tell them every negative thing you ever did to me, so they know exactly who has been taken care of them the whole time! You will probably be in jail anyway...we shall see loser!

I HATE YOU SOOO MUCH!! You know what I can’t even use that much space that I really want to but I know that I hate you so fucking changed on me so badly and it makes me sick that you took my only means of transportation



Happy seven years! Almost a quarter of our lives. It feels all at once like a brief moment and an entire lifetime. I don’t remember life before you, and I never want to be without you. I’m so lucky to live by your side and to be able to watch you become the person you were destined to be. If we can handle the things we’ve been through, babe, we can handle anything together. Thank you for understanding me. Thank you for hating sports as much as I do. Thank you for taking care of me. Thank you for nice-ing me to sleep. Thank you for making me laugh every day. Thank you for being so darn handsome. You’re the only one for me. Let’s get old and die together. Love, your tender snow bunny.

Hey bitch you think you are fucking are not! I have been nice to you from the fucking beginning and you sit there and try to stand me the fuck up...who the fuck do you think that you are fucking nothing...that is why you got beat up the fucking first time in your house that was because you were trying to get over...I don’t fucking trust you bitch...and don’t worry you are gonna get what is coming to you are on my shit list.



bly end up fucking. I already started seeing someone new. It was almost serendipitous. She responded to a 4 month old personal ad I forgot I even wrote the day after you stood me up. She’s great, she’s an actual compassionate and empathetic person. The next time you’ve got some drunken, abusive, shit bag pissing on you in the shower while calling you horrible things. Just remember, that’s what you picked.


INTENSITY I am fucking pissed. I cant tell why I feel this way or why do I had to have meet you... I keep telling myself that it will pass, and feels more like a lie every time I repeat it. I cant stop thinking about you and the brief time we spend knowing each other, I wish I knew the

✚ ADS ALSO APPEAR AT CITYPAPER.NET/lovehate. City Paper has the right to re-publish “I Love You, I Hate You”™ ads at the publisher’s discretion. This includes re-purposing the ads for online publication, or for any other ancillary publishing projects.


How the fuck did I end up with a dead beat like are fucking worthless and I know you can read so if you are reading this...yes it is about you...

so that I could take care of business and when I called you you were so nachelaunt like it didn’t matter... well it you are gonna pay for it big time. I told you before you just don’t know who you are dealing with. I will fuck your world up mentally. Hey “M’ the game has now begun...dig yourself out of this...

i fell in love with you the very first day when you saw my instagram in the park and told me to “stay there.” i miss waking you up at the last minute, and bringing you your scrabble-letter-R mug, and lunch packed with a love letter and vitamins. walking arm-in-arm, or your hand in my pocket, to 8th and walnut, on those cold mornings. going on bike rides, taking pictures, laughing together, being there for each other. i miss your face. i love you for pursuing your dreams. you inspire me to be the best version of me. i love you for your heart. i’m sorry i was insecure, jealous, and afraid. i hurt you and a good friend of yours, and pushed you away. i’ve learned my lesson. i hope you’ll forgive me. and give us another chance. i’ll be perfect. and respect your boundaries. and never take us for granted again. i love you.

P H I L A D E L P H I A C I T Y PA P E R | A U G U S T 1 - A U G U S T 7 , 2 0 1 3 | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T |

I mentally give you the finger every time that you are present. I have never seen anyone do so little for the compensation you receive. What do you do anyway? What is your job position? What is your purpose for existing on this spatial realm, o wise do nothing person? Do you even have a desk? Because you constantly walk and cease to discard any weight that noticeably protrudes from your abdomen. Yet, the worse offense with your blatant racism is that you and your fellow non desk cohorts convene near my cubicle and speak obnoxiously loud. I shall dash at full speed from the opposite end of the office to supplant your face with a dropkick, you blithering pillock!

DO WE STILL HAVE A CHANCE You would think after 20 yrs of trying we would get it right. Im sorry I left you with no explanation ...but I gave you multiple hints as well as multiple chances to show me you love me..instead you chose to ignore me and spend more time conversating with so called friends ...that all coincidentally were your x’s. I honestly had strong feelings for you but your ego got in the think your the shit ..dude you are bald with a belly the size of a 9 month pregnant woman! You have nothing to offer you cant even afford to take me to the movies...and stealing money and trying to say 8 did something with it was a good one. Thank god you showed the real you and found out you smoked that 500+dollars! Then you jump right into a relationship with the first girl that falls for your bullshit! Its fucked up that you couldnt even fuck me until you watched a porno...where you looking at the guys??? Oh and comparing me to a model with her ass hanging out saying my ass was like cottage cheese and you wanted to throw up when we fucked...on facebook was imature...I may not be a model and may not have a perfect body but ive been told by plenty of men I was beautiful and have a awesome personality! So take a good look at your fat self before you judge me...even after all this I still care about you and think we can make it work .you gotta decide me or the first girl that falls for your shit...cause im the one that will always be there... them other girls will play you like a nut...haven’t you learned yet? But like I told you dont take to long cause im not always gonna be there!

meaning of “intense”. I really do, because all I did was telling you how beautiful you are to me, and for some reason, it was too “intense”, or maybe it was off my code of words, maybe “intense” really means liar, or idiot, or scumbag, or maybe I am too old to know the difference. maybe what I need is to tell you face to face that I will be less intense to your liking, or maybe to tell you, that its ok to feel pretty and desired, that its ok for others to tell you what they see, either beautiful or not. regrettably I don’t know much more of you, to know the real reason why you shoved me away. but I wrote this to convince me that someday I will forget you, and all that would have happened. to calm myself down and think I will meet somebody else, to believe that intensity is just another word. I wish I could tell you I am sorry for what ever else I said after you were honest with me, and I also wish you could give me another chance. at least to see you one more time. but wishing is only that, chances are rare, and I long awaited for mine. after all said and done, I wish you well.



the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

[ i love you, i hate you ]

food | the agenda | a&e | feature | the naked city classifieds

apartment marketplace

PHILA 4BR/ 2BA Sec 8 Ok, New Reno, 215.322.6086 Broad & Wyoming Area $85-$125/Wk, $200 Sec, Furn, Pvt Ent, 267.784.9284 Erie Ave $350-$500 furnished room. Cable ready. SSI accptd. 267-414-4819 Germantown Area: NICE, Cozy Rooms Private entry, no drugs (267)988-5890 GERMANTOWN Clean, furnished, some w/ private bath. $125/wk 215-859-8000 Germantown Rooms for rent $125$150/wk. W/D incl. Call 267-549-4690 Kensington Area rooms for rent $250-$350, clean, furnished, Call 215-200-2960, 215-954-1972 or 267-475-3929 Olney & N Phila. $100 furn. kit privs, coin-op, crpt. 516.527.0186

Special 1 week free: North Philadelphia furn. rooms $100/wk. Call 484-636-8205 UNIVERSITY CITY - $125/ week New renov. Priv. ent. 267-596-9283 West Phila, Fully furn, new luxury rooms Bedding, refrig, microwave, ceiling fans, recessed lighting, bath in rooms, $100-$200/weekly. Call (215) 778-2140

West Phila, newly renov, furn rooms for rent, $100-$125/wk, 215-397-6635 W Phila & G-town: Newly ren, Spacious clean & peaceful, SSI ok, 267.255.8665

homes for rent 1XX W GODFREY AVE 3BR/1BA


22xx S. Hemberger St 3/1.5 $800 plus util. 267-476-0224

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60XX Buist 3br/1ba $850/mon + util new reno & gar, 610-960-0175 63xx Buist (Elmwood area) 3BR $850 + utils. Modern. Call 856-693-7222

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3508 Mercer St. 2BR/1.5BA $800 2mo. sec. dep. Credit check req., no pets. close to transportation. 215-738-8838

2BR Houses Sec. 8 Welcome Beautifully renovated Call (267)981-2718

42xx Wallace St. 3BR/1BA Newly renov., housing voucher accepted. Close to transp. Call 267-528-4121 W. & SW. Phila 2br-3br Houses $725-$925. 1st/last/sec. 215-878-2857 XX S. 55th 3BR/1Ba $850+Utils 20xx S. 60th 1Br/1BA $550+Utils "The Landlord that Cares" Mark 610-764-9739 Brandy 609-598-2299

5xx Rosalie 3BR/1BA house $800 + utilities. 267-476-0224 6376 MARSDEN 3 BR $900 private rear parking 215-290-3192 Margaret/Torresdale 2br/1ba Nice yard. Section 8 ok. 708-717-8164 NE - 1BR Apt to 3BR house. Multiple properties. Call 267-872-7125 Oxford Cir 3BR/1BA $850+Utils Completely Remodeled, 215-750-3612 Oxford Circle Area 2Br & 3BR $750-$895 +Utils. Available now, Move in Special. 215-459-6819 or 215-783-0175

resorts/rent Ocean City, NJ 3BR Apt August weeks available. $1,200. Call (609) 399-3168 N. Wildwood. Pool, Ocean, Boardwalk at our door, Daily/Weekly rental, A.M coffee & newspaper, VERY CLEAN 609.522.0500 Wildwood, NJ: New Rus Mar Motel steps to beach, pet friendly, oceanviews, renovated rms. For specials 609.522.0101

automotive Corvette Coupe 1985 $11,950 Removable Glass Top, 49,000 ORIGINAL MILES, Matching #, fortune invested. Senior Citizen Must Sacrifice today 215-922-6113

Ford Flex 2009 $17,500 35K original miles, 7 pass cross over, V6, Front Wheel Drive, 267-481-2512 Honda Accord 2010 $14,999 22,000 mi., 4 cyl. Call 610-348-3228 Honda Insight Hybrid 2010 $12,900 47 miles to gallon. 856-424-1284

Jeep Liberty 2004 $6,900/obo 3.7 L engine, Blue, 70K original Mi, 1 own er, Exc Cond, Prem Sound, 267.334.2772 Mercedes Benz E320 2000 $6,985 Luxury 4 dr w/ sunroof, positively flawless, senior citizen. Call 215-922-5342 Porche 911 Convert. ’97 $45,000 obo Under 11k miles, all documents included. Call (609)868-4535 TOYOTA CAMRY LE 2006 $8,500 55,000 miles, black. 215-880-5551

52XX Pennway 3BR $900+ Utils 60XX Phillip 3BR $900 + Utils 2 mos sec req, Garage, 267-287-3175

Montana & Grmtwn 3br/1ba $850+ hdwd flrs., fridge. Call 215-839-6468

Buick Lesabre 2000 $3000 clean, cold air, 267-755-8021 Buick LeSabre 2004 $3500, good cond, moon roof 215-679-8856 BUICK PARK AVENUE ULTRA 2000. $4500 obo. Call 215-638-7345 Cadillac Deville 2000 $3,475 auto start, chrome, 267-592-0448 Chevy Impala LS 2005 $3,000/OBO Runs great, 82K, insp. Call 267-441-4612 Chrysler Grand Carivan 2000 3 seats 8 passenger Mini-Van, full pwrs, A/C, garage kept. $3,475. Call 215-922-2165 Chrysler Town & Country 2005 $2,975 Touring, stow & go seats. 267-592-0448 Ford Explorer Luxury 4 door 2002 Fully equipped, A/C, too nice to trade in Senior Citizen will sac less than book value $3,875, not a misprint. Call 215-922-2165 Ford Explorer XLT 2003 $4495 85K, Sun roof, Gorgeous, 610-524-8835 Lincoln 1995 Luxury 4 dr Towncar, mint cond., original miles, special car for a particular buyer, $3,475. Call 215-922-5342 NISSAN MAXIMA GLE 2001 $2,300/obo. May trade, 6 cylinder, 4 door, 130K miles, Call 267-975-4483 Nissan Maxima GLE 2003 $3,895 auto, leather, gorgeous. 610-524-8835 OLDS CUTLASS CALAIS 1991, $950. 4 cylinder, 1 owner, 104K. 215-620-9383 OLDSMOBILE Delta 88 1985 $1,500 Settling estate (215) 920-0929 Saab 900 SE 1996 $2,200 4 Door, New Inspection, New perelli Tires, A/C, All Powers, Sun roof, Heated Seats, 215-200-6943. VOLVO 740 SW 1991 $950 Auto, nu insp, runs exc, 215-620-9383 Volvo C70 Convertible 2001 $4200/obo New factory top, new insp., excel. cond. Call 209-782-7863 Jenkintown area.



A1 PRICES FOR JUNK CARS FREE TOW ING , Call (215) 726-9053

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22 26

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By Matt Jones





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2001 30 FT FORD FLEETWOOD Exc Cond., Low Miles, 856-694-3091

6606 Haddington Lane 3br/1ba $995 215.740.4900

25xx Silver St. 3br/1ba. $725 + util. Section 8 OK. Call 215-630-8123 4045 N. Hollywood St. 2BR/1BA $675 Living room, dining room, kitchen, storage room in back. Call 267-592-7150

low cost cars & trucks

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Double Dare host Summers Inc., in Canterbury Square peg in a round hole Jesus in the outfield Carlos’s treasure British actress ___ Staunton “You can’t forget the cheese and crust” rebuke? Opt not to get carry-out Duo behind “Is Dave there?” “[spin spin spin]”? Snake Eyes’ team It may be crude Jumping chess pieces: abbr. Tempe sch. Great conductors Mourner of Osiris Home of the D-backs String instruments Sajak, after a radioactive run-in gives him superhuman abilities? Greet at the door First-rate Company behind Sonic the Hedgehog Lack of good sense Rule, for short Years, to Yves Chinese-born actress ___ Ling Fully informed With 62-across, unable-to-seethe-movie phenomenon? Tax dodger See 56-across

Enlightenment, to Zen Buddhists Simile words Small teams African bloodsucker Uno follower Restaurant reviewer’s website

✚ DOWN 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 18 21 22 23 24 29 30 31 32 34 37 38

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✚ ©2013 Jonesin’ Crosswords (

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Put on, as a performance They’re not really helping Bottle Rocket director Anderson The ___ Queene (Spenser work) Band over a gown, maybe “This is ___ of the emergency ...” Bright stars Winnemac, in Sinclair Lewis novels Full of dandelions “Is he ___ or is he ...” (They Might Be Giants line) Full washer “Based on that ...” After-school orgs. Orange or yellow Alternative to Prodigy or CompuServe Cook’s amt.


Land/ Lots for Sale


NY SPORTSMANâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S BEST LAND DEALS: 5 Acres w/ Rustoc Lodge: $29,999. 51 Acres, Excellent Hunting: $59,995. 74.73 Acres, Minutes from Salmon River: $99,900. Preseason Sale, Many More Proper ties 5 to 200 Acres Star ting at $12,995. Easy Financing. Call 800-229-7843 or visit

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Real Estate Wanted

Fur nished one bedroom apar tment on the second floor of a triplex for an individual. Quiet, non-smoking environment. Disston Park is across the street as well as the Tacony train station for quick and convenient access to center city. All utilities are included in rent as well as basic cable tv, wifi a n d a c c e s s t o a wa s h e r and dr yer. Street parking is usually available directly in front of house. Rent is $850/month plus a one month security deposit. $30 non-refundable credit check required. Call 215-338-4889 or email if interested.


Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! V i s i t : h t t p : / / w w w. R o o m ROOM FOR RENT

Room For Rent W/TV, W/ D, Full Use of Kitchen and Bathroom! $70 Wk and Up. Call 267-357-3119.


market place

Adoptions ADOPTION




Spacious 2bdr m Bi-level Duplex washer/dryer, central air. located 3 blocks from south street. $1200 a month. Available August 1. contact sheila 267-7846480 FISHTOWN

1600 Frankford Ave 1 and 2 bedroom apar tm e n t s, n ew l y r e h a b b e d building, h/w floors, central air, all stainless steel appliances including dishwasher, washer and dryer in each unit. $800 - $1500 Available July 1st $35 non refundable credit check 215-834-7832 FISHTOWN

1600 Frankford Ave 1 and 2 bedroom apar tm e n t s, n ew l y r e h a b b e d building, h/w floors, central air, all stainless steel appliances including dishwasher, washer and dryer in each unit. $800 - $1500 Available July 1st

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For Sale




Building Maintenance Instructor needed for building trades training program. Must have at least 3 years field experience in HVAC, electricity and appliance repair. FT, M-F, 7:30am -3:30pm, excellent bene f i t s ! Fo r c o n s i d e ra t i o n send resume attn. â&#x20AC;&#x153;BMâ&#x20AC;? to or fax 215-255-4791 EOE. ELECTRICITY

Assistant Electricity Instructor needed for building trades training program. Must have at least 3 years field experience. FT, M-F, 7:30am -3:30pm, excellent benefits! For consideration send resume attn. â&#x20AC;&#x153;ELECâ&#x20AC;? to or fax 215-255-4791 EOE HELP WANTED

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Can you dig it?â&#x20AC;? Heavy equipment Operator Training. 3 weeks hands on program. Backhoes, Bulldozers, Excavators. Lifetime Job Placement Asst w/National Certs.. VA Benefits Eligible. 866-362-6497. HELP WANTED AIRBRUSH AND MAKEUP ARTISTS

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the naked city | feature | a&e | the agenda | food

real estate


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Your premier magazine featuring everything Philly! 30 YEARS OF INDEPENDENT J O U R N A L I S M | C I T Y PA P E R . N E T


cityguide C I T Y PA P E R â&#x20AC;&#x2122; S G U I D E T O P H I L A D E L P H I A

2012 - 2013

around the world words by Emily Guendelsberger // illustration by Evan M. Lopez The availability of really good food from other cultures depends mostly on a cityâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s immigration demographics â&#x20AC;&#x201D; for example, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s tough to ďŹ nd good, cheap Thai in Philly, but good, cheap Ethiopian is available in every third bar in West Philly. You just need to know where to look. It takes


a while to suss out where to get kimchi, diamond sweets, mofongo or pierogies like grandma used to make â&#x20AC;&#x201D; a lot of the time, the really authentic food is clustered in a small area with a large immigrant population, and these clusters can be a long subway trip or even drive from Center City.

Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll have to ďŹ nd speciďŹ c restaurants on your own, but this map is a great starting point for where to start looking.

CITYGUIDE 2012 - 2013



7&3:(00% â&#x20AC;&#x153;..#&&3-*45)"4(308/ 50&1*$1301035*0/4 ,*5$)&/)"4"%%&% "/&953"#&-- 8*5)1&3)"145)& $*5:Âľ4#&45'3*5&4  40.&45&--"3#&&3 #"55&3&%'*4)"/% 7&3:(00%.644&-4Âł Craig LeBan, Philadelphia Inquirer, Revisited April 2007

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Philadelphia City Paper, August 1st, 2013  

Philadelphia's Trusted News and Entertainment Source

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