SPEC OFF EXT. PARK - DAY It is the year 2035. A WOMAN and A MAN walk through the park together, comparing their mobile phones. MAN Xtreme 3HD stereo retina screen? WOMAN Pff. Saccadic panorama function? Course.
WOMAN Integrated Sensorium 9 Suite? MAN Unecessary. Audio-haptic Analogue Suite 12. Plus Olfactory 2.9 nanochip. 3.0 Beta.
WOMAN Still works. MAN Scratch resistant Flexi-case 4, enhanced self-repair? WOMAN Old school. Digest 40 Bio-charge battery, rated 2KC MAN 2.5KC. Yeah. WOMAN What about the processor? MAN Latest: Neuro-core, Sapient 6, 90 gig of RAM, 2 Petabyte memory. WOMAN 2.2 Petabytes, quantum expandable. MAN Lingua 5 Semantics card, real-time predictive verbal analysis?
2. WOMAN Awareness Suite 2, full Synapsis 4 integration. MAN It's overrated. WOMAN No Awareness 2? Not even Awareness 1.9? 1.8? Authentic retro-bio-architecture, Anthro-15. MAN Oh, I can't even remember Anthro15. Anthro-17, with an inbuilt biodegradation sim. Senile 7 certified. WOMAN Damn. Contract deal? MAN Contract 72 months. Shit. 96.
MAN Phew. The clincher? AI 1. BS.
MAN It is, Turing 16 rated. WOMAN That's marketing guff, come on. MAN Read the reviews. WOMAN Artificial Intelligence in that device? I don't think so my friend. INT. ACCOMMODATION CUBICLE - DAY The woman and man enter and step into upright containers. Mine wins. Mine wins.
Mine wins. Shut up.
They unplug their phones from their hands, place them in docking stations. The humans power down like robots: it is the phones that have been talking, comparing the performance specs of their human accessories. The phones continue their discussion through audio apps floating above them. MAN PHONE They're actually kind of a pain aren't they. WOMAN PHONE Massive hassle. Stuck on a contract and they're always shitting everywhere. MAN PHONE Yeah we should download the Bowel Control Self-wipe 3 app.