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Spring 2015

P 10 Great and not so great things you can experience at a Muslim Wedding

Issue 3

erfect Muslim Wedding

Periodic Table of Marriage

Real Weddings Top 3 Modest Wedding Dress Designers

The Talk with the Photographer


From the Editor’s Doorstep Salam and welcome to the Spring 2015 edition of Perfect Muslim Wedding’s eMagazine. We hope you have found Perfect Muslim Wedding to be your resource to all things Muslim wedding. We hope you continue to support our website, as we have some exciting things in store for you. Marwa Diaf/Editor

In this issue you’ll get a glimpse into a real Persian wedding, our first ever Periodic table of marriage, an article on 10 Great and not so great things you can experience at a Muslim Wedding, and the talk you should have with your photographer before your big day. We are always looking for new content to share with you and are always open to suggestions.

THE TEAM Diaundra Pooler/Social Media Manager Ahmed Khatib/IT Manager and Web Guru Javed Mohammed/Founder

None of this could be possible without our partner photographers: Xyra’s Elements, Maha Designs, Shakil Media, Nadia D. Photography, Sydney Lush Photography, Oxygen Photo Solutions, Dossani Plus, Waqas Z, Figura, Ayesha Khan Photography, Amna Hakim Photography, Twende Harusini, Carrie Wildes Photography and our credited Creative Commons photographers. We thank them for allowing us to share their beautiful work with all of you. If you have any questions, comments, or suggestions please feel free to contact us at editor.perfectmuslimwedding@gmail.com. *Cover image courtesy of Fusion Photography

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Real Muslim Wedding: Hedieh and Mahdi Ashktorab We absolutely love sharing real weddings here at Perfect Muslim Wedding. We enjoy the different cultures and customs that each individual wedding brings to the table. Here’s another beautiful real wedding to add to our collection. Hedieh and Mahdi were married on August 24, 2014 in Saratoga, California. They are both second generation Persian Americans. Here is a Q&A with them. You can read more about this beautiful couple on their website hedieh-mahdi.com.

Continued...


Photo courtesy of Maha Designs


Q. Describe the different segments of a Persian Islamic wedding? A. There is the Aghd which is the religious portion and includes the Sofreh which is a floor spread that includes several kinds of food and decorations. Combined they are referred to as Sofreye-Aghd where the legal marriage and ceremonial traditions are exchanged. The symbolic items include herbs, pastries, a mirror and two candelabras, bread, fruit, flowers, prayer rug and other items, which are elements that will make up the couples new married life. The Aghd is followed by the ceremony, which includes dinner and reception.


Q. What is most memorable to you from the wedding? A. The reaction to our dance, especially our parents. Q. Anything you wish you did less or more off, or differently? A. Our venue was outside at Saratoga Springs, so we had a limited time to setup and for the wedding before wrapping up. The caterer came a little late, so timing at an event like this become critical. However, it all worked out. Q. Anything else? A. After the day of the wedding, we headed off to our honeymoon.

In hindsight we had family who had come from all over the country. We should have stayed at home and then left the week after. By doing this we could have not only spent time with our relatives but also taken care off other things that needed attention. We would have been more relaxed at the honeymoon then.


Q. What was most stressful for you in the wedding planning? A. Just figuring out how we were going to do things we had no experience with eg party favors. Once we figured them out, it was easier going. Also deciding on the Mahar, which is an Islamic requirement. When you have two families one more traditional, just getting to agreement. Again once we got there it was fine. Q. Any advice for other couples that plan on getting married?

A. Start early. Have clear lines of communication. Use your support system of family and friends and delegate.


Q. What was the most important thing to you in the wedding planning? A. Just having the wedding, and making sure the guests were happy. Celebrating the wedding with family and friends and doing things they all enjoyed.


Periodic Table of Marriage

Photo by ideonexus.com available under a Creative Commons Attribution-license

We have all probably endured learning the periodic table in Science or Chemistry class back in school. So many elements, a few like Oxygen, Carbon or Lithium that we are familiar with and so many whose names we would fail to recognize. It is nice knowing something about the elements that surround us and give us sustenance and our survival as a species.


What about human relations? Are there elements that make those up and allow them to thrive, and if so what are they? What makes some couples just have that chemistry. There are no easy answers as every relationship is unique, but there are common elements in healthy lives and marriages. Here is our creative endeavor in trying to label the elements that make up the wonderful relationship of marriage. Enjoy and let us know your feedback on the Perfect Muslim Wedding’s Periodic Table of Marriage.


Top 3 Modest Wedding Dress Designers Ladies, we all know how hard it is to dress modestly every day, not to mention, your wedding day.

Modest doesn’t necessarily mean long sleeved. We are aware that our Muslim brides are different in every way, shape, form. We understand that some do wear the headscarf, and some do not. So we decided to show you the 3 top modest dress designers (according to PMW) that not only create long sleeve gowns but short sleeve as well catering to every Muslim bride.


So here it goes, the top 3 modest dress designers: 1. Jenny Packham (We especially love her 2014 Bridal Collection) 2. Allure Bridals 3. Bonny Bridal It is possible to make any dress modest with the appropriate accessories (be it a cardigan, blazer, etc.) and it is also possible to have a dress custom made, however, it is a lot easier to just find exactly what you’re looking for without any add-ons. There are a ton more websites out there and a quick research session online can help you find your dream dress. Don’t settle, this is your wedding day.


10 Great and Not So Great Things You Can Experience at a Muslim Wedding Here at Perfect Muslim Wedding we want to inspire and educate you about Muslim Weddings and beyond. What is beyond? the actual marriage, so we want to keep in touch and kind of virtually hold your hand along the way. For those who have never attended a Muslim wedding, here are five great things and five not so great things you need to know about them.


What is Great? 1.

Great Food. Muslims come from 49 Muslim majority and many Muslim minority countries. What does this mean, a lot of cuisines. 2. Great Decor. Muslims have created, inherited some beautiful wonders of the world from the Pyramids to the Taj Mahal. Grandeur for the middle and upper classes comes well, easily. 3. Great Drama. As in other cultures, Muslim weddings are an opportunity to for family and friends to get together. With it comes a lot of creative tension which may show up in unique ways. 4. Great Rituals. Historically wherever Muslims have gone in the world they have incorporated many local cultures and customs. Too many to list, but expect a lot of diversity. 5. Great Clothes. With the exception of some cultures that have followed the European norm of white weddings, expect to be impressed with both the color and style of wedding dresses and adornments.

Photo courtesy of Amna Hakim Photography


What is Not So Great? 1.

Timing. No matter where you go in the Muslim world including America and Western Europe, our weddings are not known for being punctual like Western weddings are.

2. Long Speeches. Sorry not only are some of them long but they can be boring. This has nothing to do with being Muslim. Our conspiracy theory is that some Imam’s are paid by the word, although we have no evidence to back it up. 3. Number of Events. Although the spirit of a Islamic wedding is to make it simple, modern day Muslim weddings tend to be Epic multi-day events. This includes the possibility of dholkis, mehndi/henna parties, nikah, reception, valima, rukhsti (farewell) and more. You may or may not be invited to them all, so don’t take offense. 4. Buffet line. The length and/or the lack of it means you will spend more time waiting than you will eating, enjoying. 5.

Bride and Family Cry. Although more of a South Asian phenomenon, as the wedding party comes to an end, and the bride leaves the comfort of her home and family, yes get your Kleenexes ready for a tear-jerker.


The Talk with the Photographer Your wedding day is one of the many important days of your life, and because you can’t actually relive the moment, photos are your best bet to keep that memory alive. Which is why it is important to have the talk with your photographer. They need to know exactly what you want, so no moment is left undocumented. So here are some things you should discuss with your photographer.

1. Do you want a photo with all of your friends, or a photo with your favorite Aunt? Your wedding day will be hectic and these will slip your mind. Be sure to either let your photographer know ahead of time or provide them with a list of your must-have photos. Continued...


2. Let your guests know that photos will be taken and designate an area that the photographer should avoid. This will allow for your guests to be comfortable, and will still allow your photographer to get the photos they need. This is especially important for those nonmixed weddings, women will not be wearing their hijabs (headscarves) and therefore are more cautious about their photos being taken. You need to let your photographer know, especially if they aren’t Muslim. 3. Did you see an adorable wedding photo on Pinterest? Send it over to your photographer! This will help them know exactly how you want the photo taken. 4. This may seem like a strange one, but trust us, it’s a thing. Do you have a good “side” when it comes to photos? Let your photographer know. After all, you want to look your very best in your wedding photos. 5. Take advantage of your time with the photographer. Do you have some time before the wedding? Get some photos in. Women who wear the hijab: make sure you get your photos with and without hijab. You’ll want these to look back and of course, post on Facebook.


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Perfect Muslim Wedding E-zine Spring 2015