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Love, it’s a touchy subject which everyone is seeking for. Not the disney love or the hopes of a fairytale happily ever after, the real kind of love. The ups and downs, the affairs, the betrayal. I wan’t to explore the heartaches as well as the happiness. I put together my thoughts on what love is to me and also what people go through on their journeys. So skip through and enjoy the roller coaster.


Define Love A profoundly tender, passionate affection for another person.


Turn Offs For Women Creating unnecessary drama Loud (for no reason) Nagging Stink attitude Stuck up Gold diggers (All about the money and material things) Ungroomed feet Hair armpits Swearing (too much) Smoking (some guys) Way too much make up (Too orange or drag queenish) Going raving or clubbing (24/7) Moody Boring Bad breath Weaves (mixed crowd, some guys don’t mind it) Immature


Turn Offs For Men Too clingy Overally hair (especially back hair) Bad temper Cocky Comparing you to their ex Jacked up teeth Insecure No sense of humour Body odour Saggying pants (not cute) Annoying Bad breath Immature Bad hygiene Sloopy kisser Long nails (Especially the one random long pinky finger nail)


CHEATING: A PERSON WHO ACTS DISHONESTLY, DECEIVES OR DEFRAUDS WHAT IS CHEATING TO YOU? TEXTING? KISSING? SLEEPING WITH SOMEONE ELSE? DO MEN CHEAT ON WOMEN MORE, OR ARE WOMEN BETTER AT HIDING THESE INFIDELITIES? WOMEN CHEAT FOR EMOTIONAL RESONS AND MEN CHEAT FOR SEXUAL REASONS? SENSITIVE SUBJECT I KNOW BUT PERFECT LOVE IS HARDER TO FIND NOWADAYS. WITH ALL THE TEMPTATION IN THE WORLD, SOME PEOPLE FAILED THAT PART OF THE TEST OF STAYNG FAITHFUL IN A RELATIONSHIP. EVERYONE HAS THEIR REASONS AND MOST OF THEM SAY THEY SAY “IT’S NOT YOU, ITS ME” WHAT DOES THAT MEAN?, IS THAT JUST A CLICHE OR AN EASIER WAY TO GET OF THE SITUATION. BUT THE BEST THING TO DO IS LEARN FORGIVENESS, NOT FOR THEM BUT YOURSELF. HERE ARE A FEW OF REASONS WHY MAY PEOPLE CHEAT. -STARTS FROM SIN. FLESH IS SELFISH AND GREEDY -NO COMMUNICATION -LACK OF AFFLICTION -LACK OF INTIMACY -COMPULSIVE LIAR -LACK OF APPRECIATION -THE EXCITEMENT (SOME PEOPLE LIKE TO PLAY WITH FIRE, UNTIL THEY GE BURNED) -BOREDOM. HE/SHE MAY FIND YOU TO BORING AND WOULD GO ON TO THE NEXT ONE -REVENGE (KARMA’S A B*TCH) -NEGLECTION, PARTNER COULD FEEL LONELY AND FIND SOMEONE WHO WILL COMFORT THEM -UNFULFILLMENT -INSECURITIES -BECAUSE YOU LET THEM? -THE WAY THEY ARE BROUGHT UP, THEY COULD OF SEEN THESE PARENTS DO IT? -CONFUSION? THE LIST GOES ON, JUST USE YOUR HEAD. IF YOU STILL WANT TO STAY IN A RELATIONSHIP LIKE THIS THE CHOICE IS YOURS. BUT IF THE FOUNDATION WAS BUILT ON LUST THEN THEY ARE UNLIKELY TO STAY FAITHFUL. LASTLY, IF YOUR GONNA CHEAT WHY BE IN A RELATIONSHIP, WHY NOT JUST BE SINGLE?


SIGNS YOUR A SIDE PIECE -IF HE/SHE ONLY TEXTS YOU -IF YOU DON’T KNOW WHERE YOUR “MAN/WOMAN” LIVES OR WORKS AND ON Y MEETS YOU AT HOTELS/MOTELS -IF YOU HAVEN’T BEEN BEEN OUT IN PUBLIC WITH EACH OTHER. EVER. -HE/SHE ONLY WANTS A “PRIVATE” RELATIONSHIP. -IF YOU HAVE NEVER MEET HIS/HER FRIENDS. -HE/SHE REFUSES TO TAKE PICTURES WITH YOU. (DO YOU HAVE ANY PICTURES TOGETHER?) -HE/SHE DOESN’T WANT TO BE IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP. -DOESN’T SHOW ANY AFFECTION -YOU NEVER HAD A REAL COVERSATION -HE/SHE ALWAYS LEAVES THE ROOM EVERYTIME HIS/HER PHONE RINGS/MAKES A CALL -IF YOU MAKE A PUBLIC MESSAGE ON A SOCIAL MEDIA WEBSITE (FACEBOOK/ TWITTER) AND HE/SHE DELETES IT INSTANTLY AND YOU GET AN INBOX STRAIGHT AWAY FROM THEM -HE/SHE CAN NEVER MAKE ANY ‘DEFINITE PLANS’ THEY WILL ‘LET YOU KNOW’. -IF YOU CALL AND HE/SHE NEVER PICKS UP THE PHONE AND ALWAYS CALLS/TEXTS YOU BACK SEVERAL HOURS LATER.


Oh so it’s my turn to speak ok here it goes. Well where should I start in the present and travel back to the past or discuss the future we could’ve had. I think the fact that we were never us we were just a “could’ve been” sometimes leaves me wondering I can’t front. All the ups and downs I guess we could never say our friendship was boring. I respect you a lot and thank you for everything you have taught me through the arguments and disagreements can’t say it hasn’t strengthened us. I guess we could say we have already seen each other at our worsts I think lol. I feel as if through our friendship we were tested in many areas and surprisingly even though most around us doubted we would make it to the other side, we came out on top but not as high as I may have wanted. There is no doubt in my mind that the frustration, confusion, rejection and miscommunication was what led me to believe we didn’t want the same things, made me feel as if in your eyes I would never be enough for you. Each word represented a brick that was placed around my heart I blocked myself from showing you my all. That kinda sucks right? but I guess I could just say oh well but I would have preferred you to have given me a chance to knock them walls down or maybe showed me the proof that I could. They say there’s a time for everything I guess that just wasn’t our time. All I can say now is I wish you the best! You have grown into a great person and I will never regret the day our friendship began. From your past to your present


Dear Future Husband, Before I get into all the emotional and lovie-dovie stuff there are just a few practical facts I feel that you should know, for starters I am a snorer even though I still don’t believe it to be true so many people have told me that there may be a slight chance that it’s true. I hope you are one of those guys that fall asleep really easily. Another thing I think you should know is that I am absolutely rubbish at saving money not but for some reason I know that you are amazing at budgeting. Oh and lastly just in case you would like to make me a cup of tea in the morning I take two sugars and no milk. I feel like everything that has happened in my life or will happen in my life has led me to you. All of my bad choices, all of my good choices and heartbreaks. You know when someone asks you “Do you have any regrets and if you could change one thing from your past; what would it be?” My answer would be nothing.  If I had done anything differently I would have never met you. I want to tell you how excited I am to meet you, I know you are someone that God has made just for me. I’m excited to spend my life with you and for us to have enough children to make a football team :) I’m anxious to learn everything thing about you even the smallest things like how you like your tea and which side of the bed you like to sleep on. Until we meet, I’ll keep making good choices and hopefully not so many bad choices; because eventually I’m sure we will find each other. Lots of love, Your future Wife.


Future Husband, This feels unorthodox to me. I was just about to give up on you before the concept of your genuine existence popped up in my brain. I just get so fed up keeping it authentic with flaky peasants unsure of their purpose in life expecting me to play Oprah, stay calm always and smile while they Chat shit to me on my sofa. I am true to myself , for me their is no need to run the race I will be on that side line watching the game. I never wanted to have an expectation of you or a list of things I want you to look like or do. Down heartedly I do; men in my life have continued to disappoint me and i have continued to give them a chance, I am so done i just know if you ever read this God had to be moving because I really just got my life on some real Girl please ish. So here goes it, I ask that you take me for who I am. Acknowledge my efforts tell the truth be very honest even if you think it will hurt me or us. Love me like you love yourself , and trust me I will be a woman of my word. And give you my heart sincerely, give you my trust honestly. Shed light on your strengths regularly. I will be here to pray with you when ever you feel it is necessary. When we have good times I will make them great times. When things are not as we hoped or planned I will not give up on us I will share with you ways to create our master plan. Nobody is perfect I am fully aware as I make mistakes based on fear. I want to depart knowing I gave you a chance to love me more than any basic bum from my past. Future husband where ever you are have faith we will meet someday and that we laugh at how bewildered I am to address this too you without knowing who you are. Future husband I love you whom ever you are. The though of your existence is imprinted on my heart like a kiss over a scar. Xxx.


L

V I D E O P L AY L I S T SHANEL COOPER-SYKES IHUSTLENATION IYLANA VANZANT DIARY OF A CHEATING WOMAN THE COUPLE THE NUMBER WHY DID I GET MARRIED? STRANGERS, AGAIN DIARY OF A TIRED BLACK MAN TONYATKO PASTOR ANTHONY MURRAY TWO CAN PLAY THAT GAME YouTube/Google search


PEARL BOGLE-IVY

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