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Teen Dating Advice about Teenage Drinking: Friends don’t let Friends DATE Drunk This article describes the emotional and physical hazards of alcohol in teenage dating relationship by drawing parallels with drunk driving. Teenage Drinking: Being Designated Driver The problem with designated drivers is that they are often participating in the same activity along with the friends they have been enlisted to protect. For instance, say I go with a group of friends to a St. Patty’s Day party where the overwhelming theme is alcohol and teenage drinking. If I am the designated driver, how will I steer clear of the keg so that I make sure my best friend will get home safely? Am I smart and sober enough to take away her keys before she puts herself in danger? A designated driver has a tough job – stay sober, keep your friend in line, make sure she doesn’t do something stupid and then deliver her safely home so that she can sleep it off. Teenage drinking and driving, in fact drinking and driving at ANY age, is a scary thing. If you think that’s a challenge, how do you keep your best friend from teenage drinking and DATING? When do you step in and take away the keys to their heart to keep them safe? How much influence do you have over your friend who is intoxicated with some guy she is dating? What are the chances she will be able to “sleep it off” by tomorrow? Teen Dating Advice: Double Dating Alone Here is the reality about dating someone who drinks excessively (and by that I do mean the legal limit). What you are actually signing up for is dating two different people at once. Yep, double dating alone. Think about it – do people act differently when they are drinking, not to mention drunk? Maybe they are shy sober and outgoing when they are drinking; happy sober and irritable when drunk… smart sober and well, just plain stupid when they have


had too much to drink! Trust this teen dating advice; at some point, you have to decide which person you want to date. If you are honest and had to choose, there is one “persona” you like more than the other. If it is the sober girl, then how does teenage drinking change your social life? If it is the drunken guy, then how often do you have to keep him intoxicated to enjoy his company? Really, when it comes to teenage drinking, you are only dating half a person half of the time. Geez this teen dating advice is complicated just to write about! Teen Dating Advice: Teenage Drinking is a Relationship Collision Course Date a drinker and you will have more problems than you bargained for. You don’t know which personality will show up to the party. You can never be certain when the teenage drinking will stop. You have no control over how they act or what they might be willing to do when they are drunk. All rules go out the window, with common sense in hot pursuit. Trust this teen dating advice: with teenage drinking, you risk verbal and physical abuse, injury, tragic choices, devastating consequences and the list goes on. And it’s all in the name of “fun.” A speeding car wrapped around a tree stops being fun on impact. At what point does the consuming nature of alcohol in the relationship stop being fun? After someone gets hurt? When you say your vows? When the affection turns to abuse? When your children witness the fighting? Yes, drinking and driving is extremely dangerous, so is teenage drinking and dating. The difference is that driving drunk is measurable, identifiable and within a specific time frame. Dating a drinker? Not so much. What is your “legal limit” when it comes to teenage drinking and dating? Any thoughts on this teen dating advice? Mama j In the book Dater’s Ed, Lisa Jander, the Teen-Whisperer, helps parents teach their teenagers to learn how to “date defensively, navigate safely and steer clear of unhealthy relationships.” www.DatersEd.com


Teen Dating Advice About Teenage Drinking: Friends Don’t let Friends DATE Drunk