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Antsy about ants? See Page 2.

Over Easy, Please Volume 3, Number 21

Published in print and online every Friday

Price: FREE

Fort Saskatchewan, Alberta • Friday, March 15, 2013



A new “leash” on life for this pup. P. 3

Funds raised for Boys & Girls Club. P. 8

LOCAL STUDENT HONORED Next phase of NWMP Fort underway

The City of Fort Saskatchewan announced that construction of the next phase of the 1875-1885 NWMP Fort will proceed. Macdonald & Lawrence Timber Framing Ltd. has been awarded the contract for the design and construction of the Stables and the Divisional Kitchen/Guard Room, said the City in a media release last Friday.

Fort Saskatchewan Mayor Gale Katchur (R) presents Fort High Grade 12 student Alan Wooden (C) with an Award of Merit for his role in helping save the life of Jayson Williams (L).

“Alan played a huge role in helping save the life of one of our students.” - Fort High Principal Weylin Gilewich BY REECE SELLIN A local Grade 12 student was honored on Wednesday afternoon for his role in helping to save the life of one of his classmates. 17-year-old Alan Wooden and fellow Fort High Grade 12 student Jayson Williams were working at Northlands in Edmonton on February 16th when disaster struck; Williams suddenly collapsed and went into cardiac arrest. The hundreds of students attending an assembly in Wooden’s honor on Wednesday were told that while a responder at

Northlands began working to save Williams’ life, Wooden was instrumental in assisting by administering rescue breathing during the critical minutes before an ambulance arrived. “This has been a very traumatic incident for Alan and we wanted to recognize him for his life saving efforts,” said Fort High Principal Weylin Gilewich. “Alan played a huge role in helping save the life of one of our students.” “It gives me great pride as the Mayor of our City

to know that we have such outstanding young citizens in our community like Alan, and I’m sure, like many of you as well,” Mayor Gale Katchur told the assembly. Katchur presented Wooden with a plaque that was inscribed as follows: “Award of Merit for Alan Daniel Wooden. In recognition of your brave action to provide life saving measures to a fellow student on February 16th, 2013. With gratitude, Mayor Gale Katchur & Councillors, City of Fort Saskatchewan.” CONTINUED ON P. 2.

“A sponsorship program was developed to encourage corporate and private donations for the project. Phase III is sponsored by MEGlobal who donated $200,000 towards the project. In January, The City also received a $500,000 grant from the Government of Canada under the Community Adjustment Fund Grant,” said Mayor Gale Katchur. “The cost of Phase III will be within the $1,350,000 Council approved budget,” she concluded.

Sherwood Park hit & run The Strathcona County RCMP are seeking the public’s assistance in an ongoing hit and run investigation. Police say that a late model silver Honda Civic had been traveling on Ridgeland Place in Sherwood Park at approximately 3:50am on Sunday evening. The vehicle crashed through a fence and struck a residence before fleeing the scene. The residence apparently suffered extensive damage from the collision. Anyone having information on this crime is encouraged to contact the Strathcona County RCMP at 780-467-7741 or call Crime Stoppers at 1-800-222-8477.

H: -11 L: -17 SAT

H: -8 L: -15 SUN

H: -3 L: --14 MON

TUE -9/-17 SUNNY

THU -4/-12 P. CLOUDY



100 days until Summer!

Over Easy, Please

March 15, 2013

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Hours: Mon-Wed 7AM-4PM Thu-Sat 7AM-7PM Closed Sundays + Stat Holidays Dine In or Take Out 10001 103 St, Fort Sask. 780-997-0084

Phone: 780-998-0730 Fax: 780-992-1229

The Issue

Ants in the Winter? Where?! By OEP Editor JUDY SELLIN

11228-87 Avenue, Fort Saskatchewan Repair and Servicing • Wheel Alignments Buses, Heavy Duty & Light Trucks Automotive • Licensed Inspection Facility (C.V.I.P.)

For a while, it looked like an early Spring, but this week the weather is much colder, seemingly revealing that Spring is not here yet... at least not for most of us. But for LOCAL STUDENT, CONT. Rather miraculously, despite his ordeal, Jayson Williams was also able to attend the ceremony, and has in fact returned to school at Fort High. Physicians at the Royal Alexandra and University of Alberta hospitals were able to determine that the cause of Williams’ sudden collapse was an uncommon disorder, termed Wolff-Parkinson-White syndrome (WPW).

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Williams’ father, Terry, who happens to be a first aid instructor, told OEP that the only time his son Jayson had ever been cared for in a hospital prior to this incident was when he was born. Jayson spent twelve days in hospital, including some time when he was artificially cooled and placed in a medically-induced coma. The syndrome that affected Williams, WPW, is what is referred to as a disorder of the conduction system of the heart. It affects between 0.1% to 0.3% of the general population. Although most individuals with WPW are asymptomatic, a small percentage ultimately perish due to sudden cardiac death. Terry Williams told OEP that WPW symptoms such as rapid heart rate, anxiety, and sudden cardiac arrest often strike oth-

one fellow and his wife, their apartment suite seemingly has not lost all aspects of Spring nor Summer. As the fellow explained to me this week, they have apparently been sharing their lives with armies of black ants. It is no secret that there are plenty of ant hills in our yards in the warm months of the year out here.

(like pouring gasoline on their mounds). However, for this fellow and his wife, the ants appear to be coming through cracks in the floor under the carpet in their rented dwelling. It is one thing to have to tolerate ants in the warm months, when they burrow outside, but to have ants taking up residency in a home and in the winter yet, certainly is not a pleasant event.

And yes, it is difficult if not impossible to get rid of ants, although some folks get “ant crazed,” trying various ways to get rid of them... some of which are obviously dangerous

There has to be a solution for this couple’s ant problem... although I am not the one who has the solution. Do you have the solution?

erwise healthy young adults, many between the ages of seventeen and twenty-one.

memory loss, even that is progressively improving. Even more encouraging for Williams’ family is that the rest of his immediate family has been tested for WPW, and do not appear to suffer from the syndrome.

Fortunately for his son, in part by the fast action of his schoolmate, Jayson Williams did not become an unfortunate WPW statistic. And, even more encouraging is that a very effective procedure exists to cure WPW. An electrophysiologist at the Mazankowski Heart Institute has already performed the procedure on Williams, who will soon return for further testing to ensure that the procedure has been successful. But, the possibility of a tragic outcome was not far from the minds of Williams’ family as they rushed to the Royal Alexandra Hospital in Edmonton. Terry Williams told OEP that the initial call to inform him of Jayson’s collapse was soon followed by even more devastating news -- that his son’s heart had stopped. He would later learn that there were also difficulties with intubation, further threatening his son’s life. However, although Williams was without oxygen for what may have been as long as eleven minutes, and did not breathe on his own for two days, he is now well on the road to recovery. And, although he has suffered some short-term

As for Alan Wooden, whose actions to save Williams’ life were described on Wednesday as “heroic” by Mayor Katchur, he is showing what is very evidently a characteristic humility. Asked if there’s one thing in particular he’d like to say to Jayson, he jokingly said “Don’t ever do that again.” Williams laughingly replied: “Don’t worry, I definitely don’t plan on it.” The community’s pride in Alan’s actions are also shared by his family. Alan’s sister, parents and stepparents were all in attendance at Wednesday’s ceremony, and expressed their pride in Alan stepping up to help save the life of his friend. “We are very proud of him,” agreed Alan’s girlfriend, Natasha. “He was in shock, but tried to stay calm.” Keeping one’s cool during a crisis was, ironically, the exact advice Wooden gave when asked what others should do if ever confronted with a similar type of emergency: “Try and stay calm.”

Over Easy, Please is published weekly on Fridays. We are located in Fort Saskatchewan, Alberta, and are a publication of Tuckbook Inc. Our website is located at Over Easy, Please welcomes opinions and comments. Please note that we reserve the right to edit comments for length, style, legality and taste. Comments sent to us or posted to our website may be reproduced in print and/ or electronic format. The views and opinions expressed in this publication are solely those of the original authors and other contributors. Therefore, the views and opinions expressed herein do not necessarily represent those of Tuckbook Inc., and/or any/all contributors to this publication. We reserve the right to reject or remove advertising that we deem contrary to our ad philosophy, at our sole and

exclusive discretion. Please view our contact information on page 8. This newspaper is not edible.

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Over Easy, Please

Tails of Wags and Whiskers “Terra’s Tale”

By CAROLE MCGOWAN Hello fellow animal lovers! I am h o n oured to have b e e n asked to share my animal rescue stories with you. I have been volunteering for Second Chance Animal Rescue (SCARS) for 3 years. We are a no-kill animal rescue group that takes in animals scheduled for euthanasia from northern pounds, and place them with foster families until we can find “furever” homes. My husband and I foster puppies, and have the unenviable task of housebreaking them, and sometimes nursing them back to health. We specialize in pups recovering from the deadly parvovirus, a highly contagious disease that is fatal to young pups and unvaccinated dogs. A gentle reminder to ensure your furry friend is up to date on their vaccinations! I would like to share with you a story about one of our first foster puppies… The SCARS volunteer had driven straight from rural Alberta with dogs to hand over to the foster homes. We were warned that our foster was shy, not surprising with the trauma they have endured. They are live trapped, or surrendered and taken to the pound, where it is noisy and frightening. Arriving at our location, we peered into the van, and saw a pair of big terrified eyes staring back at us from inside a crate. The driver reached in her hand to pull out the puppy, and received a bite for her efforts. Impossible! Puppies are supposed to be cute and cuddly! After several tries to dislodge the occupant from the crate, we tried to dump her out. No way; she braced herself inside and was not budging. The crate was her safe place. Finally, we managed to transfer her into our vehicle, where she cowered inside her new crate. This was not what we expected! No puppy love from this sad creature. Arriving home, we opened the crate to let her out, with no success. Bribing with treats didn’t work either. She had to come out eventually! But she didn’t. We hauled the crate outside, opened the door and went back in the house to watch. After a while, a muzzle peeked out, followed by a gaunt, quivering body. Quickly relieving herself, she dashed back to the safety of her crate. And that was how the following week played out. Haul the crate out, go back in the house, wait until she was back in her crate, then haul the

March 15, 2013 crate back inside. My dogs gave her a wide berth. They must have sensed her absolute “terror” at her new surroundings. Terror, shortened to Terra…a perfect name for her! Each night I would sit on the floor in front of the crate with a treat. She would not make eye contact with me, but would glance at the treat. After several evenings of this, she inched her way out, a little further each time. I would look away, and she would grab the treat and dash back to her crate. Three weeks of patience, gentle speech and slow movements and we were rewarded with Terra allowing us to touch her head. We were making progress, she was gaining weight, and the crate was getting heavier by the day. But we had a system and it was working. One day, as I opened the door to let the other dogs inside, a brown flash went dashing past me to hide under the table. As long as she could travel inside the safety of the pack, away from human contact, going in and out of the house had been mastered. Our first prospective adopters came out to meet Terra, with good intentions and the prospect of a challenge. Despite my suggestions for them to wait for Terra to leave the crate, they insisted on poking treats at her through the bars of the ken-

nel. They meant well, but their actions set us back a few days, and they left telling us they’d “think about it”. We never heard from them again. Our next potential adopter was a lady who lived south of Edmonton. I didn’t scare her away with my honesty, and she wanted a trial weekend with Terra. Five acres of fenced land to run, and most importantly a woman with infinite patience and a kind heart. It was an instant match! Terra’s new mom and I still keep in touch. She sends pictures and updates on Terra, who now snoozes on their couch and enjoys being petted and brushed. They say a picture is worth a thousand words, and the pictures below say it best.

Terra Before

Terra After

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Over Easy, Please

Pet of the Week Prince

Prince is a four -month-old pup who loves going to the dog park to run off leash. He’s particularly fond of his stuffed Kermit the Frog, and is never one to turn down a treat. He also loves to play with other dogs and puppies, but he is happiest spending cuddle time with his human “mom” and human “sister.”

March 15, 2013

Inspirational Thought

Two Thumbs Down

“What a wonderful life I’ve had! I only wish I’d realized it sooner.” --Colette

To those who take up two parking spaces... not considerate is it?

Spiritual Thought

Funny Yokes

“Give God what’s right - not what’s left.” -- Author Unknown

Q: What do bunny rabbits and baby chicks have in common? A: Easter

Random Act of Giving Suggestion Know someone who would love a bouquet of Yellow daffodils? Let this be your random act of giving for this week.

High Five To the owners of the Brant Hotel for installing new cool doors on the Pub side entrance of the hotel.

Q: Why did the hen faint? A: She laid a chocolate egg.

A Spoonful of Sugar... ... lightly sprinkled over a bowl mixture of raisins, cheerios, dried cranberries, shreddies, and a few mini pretzels is a yummy TV snack.

Song Choice of the Week Alicia Keys: A Brand New Me

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Book Choice of the Week Proof of Heaven- - by Eben Alexander (A neurosurgeon recounts his near death experience during a coma from bacterial meningitis.)

Did You Know?

Community Info Fort Saskatchewan Public Library: 10011-

102 Street. Mon-Thu: 10a9p, Fri: 10a-5p, Sat: 10a-5p, Sun: 1p-5p (closed Sun in Jul + Aug)

Commuter Bus Service: Mon-Fri, Clareview

That Bethenny Frankel, from the Housewives of New York and who recently became a multi million with her Skinny Girl Cocktails collections, among other products, is now divorcing her husband Jason Hoppy.

<-> to Fort Sask. Departs Sherridon Dr and 99 Ave 5:34a, 6:04a, 6:34a, 7:19a, 4:16p, 5:16p, 5:46p, 6:28p, 7:08p. See or call 780.442.5311 for full route details or more info.

The couple tied the knot in 2010.

Walk In Medical Clinic: 9368 Southfort

Drive, next to Shoppers Drug Mart. Call 780-9970177 for info.

Dingers by Ken Schotsch

Over Easy, Please

Heart & Soul: Make it Home for Supper

By Fort Sask Life Church Pastor BILL OLSEN The little BC coast Island I grew up on is a b o u t five or six miles wide and sixteen miles long, the epicentre of many adventures for a little skinny kid with a huge imagination. Back in the 60s, parents weren’t too concerned about what you were up to, as long as you were home by supper time. Although we never wore watches, we always seemed to know pretty much when that was... of course if you were late... there was NO supper, so you just never were late again. Many times, as we sat around the supper table, we were asked (or at least I was) what we did that day... totally thinking, while they asked, that I was at the neighbor’s house playing some sort of game. Sometimes I would tell them, sometimes not... as long as I was home for supper, everything was good. In my preteen years, we lived pretty much in the centre of the island, which meant that nothing was very far away, and I could easily ride my trusty Triumph Coaster bike anywhere in an hour or two at the most. Nearby, was a village that had a couple of awesome

hills leading into it, and was nestled in a narrow bay with lots of docks and boats. It was great. In the summer days, the pavement would get unbearably hot and was perfect for creating the best skid marks, and if you rode fast enough and leaned forward on your bike, thus transferring your weight to the front, you could “lay rubber” for 100 feet easily. So, we would ride into town, getting as much speed as possible going down the long hill, passing cars, (going the same direction), and then just as we passed the people window shopping and visiting out on the street, we would slam on our brakes and “lay rubber”. The best part was that once the rear tire skidded long enough it would heat up and let out a screech that sounded like a car skidding out of control, and scare the daylights out of people as they would look for where to run, only to find a couple of skinny kids with bikes and big grins.

March 15, 2013 We loved the reactions... it’s what gave us life.

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Another favourite was again, to ride down the long hill as fast as possible, down on to one of the wharfs, and ride off the end into the water. We did this to cool off, but, it was also useful for startling the locals, or, even better, the tourists. We would sometimes find some visitors there taking in the sun, admiring the scenery, and two skinny kids everso-slightly out of control, screaming for effect “No Brakes!” Right past the nice people, off the end of the wharf and 20 feet down into the ocean... it was great. Of course, we knew what we were doing, and could easily hang on to our bikes and pull them back to a nearby ladder and pull them back onto the deck. It was a bit of work, but the look on people’s faces were so worth the effort. Especially when they ran down to help us out. CONTINUED ON PAGE 7

Sunny Smiles

Celebrity Smile Edition! Guess who this beautiful celebrity babe is, and check back next week to see if you are right!

Beautiful Babes

Celebrity Babe Edition! Guess who this beautiful celebrity babe is, and check back next week to see if you are right! Last week: Justin Bieber

Over Easy, Please

March 15, 2013

Odds, Sods and Nods “The Odder it Gets...” By STUART MCGOWAN Greetings to all! Well, the title says it all. Well, sort of says it all. O h , what t h e heck, y o u aren’t getting where I am going this week. That may be a good thing, because I want to get you right between the ears with this week’s column. I have been noticing of late that between various apathies to what is happening in the world, to political correctness, to the punishment fitting the crime, I am beginning to wonder, what we as the public, will tolerate next. As much as I find all kinds of good things to fill this space with and, for the most part, believe that people in general are good and do good things, it seems to be the hidden, visible minority (and I DON’T mean any ethnic group or race of people) that get the headlines for what we allow them to do. You read correctly,

Page 6 what we ALLOW them to do. Some of the is sues may appear to be right or wrong, black or white, negative or positive, but the overall truth is they are none of these. I am not talking morally nor am I talking about being self-righteous. I am talking about what we as a society see going on around us, some of which directly impacts us, some of which seems as far away as a third world country (whatever that REALLY means). What I do know is this. We need to look at what goes on around us and what truly affects us and those we love or care about. There are some very good laws on the books and I keep waiting for them to be uniformly applied. Not double standards, not one law for the rich and another for the poor, or one set of laws for regular Canadians and another for ethnic groups. Don’t say “Oh, that never happens in Canada”. Start reading the news, surf the web, watch a newscast, listen to the radio. There are many instances every day that this occurs. One example that comes to mind is the Federal Government being taken to task over the disproportionate number of First

Nations people who are incarcerated and that they should spend more money on First Nations programs and even consider what needs to be done to reduce the numbers. Is there an easy answer? No. Is it just a misperception? Again, I encourage you to check into the issue. My wife has this week become a purveyor of the written word, a scribe. Ok, she has become a journalist with her column about animals, in particular this week, dogs. We both volunteer for SCARS (Second Chance Animal Rescue Society) and this past week has been horrendous for the Society having had a number of dogs come in from somewhere, who were all badly scarred from being burnt with hot liquid. They required surgery and a LOT of TLC. This surgery is not cheap. SCARS is a non-profit group who rely on donations to help pay for things like this. My point is, if caught, the perpetrators will likely get a slap on the wrist. A nominal fine, perhaps a few hundred dollars and maybe even, if the justice system is feeling really feisty, being banned for a few years from owning an animal. CONTINUED ON P. 7

Over Easy, Please

March 15, 2013

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Fort Saskatchewan’s Categorized Business Section COMPUTER TECHNOLOGY





Church Listings Fort Saskatchewan Life Church 50-10420 98 Ave. (Back of Fort Mall). Sunday Service/Kids Church @ 10:15a. Wed. Service @ 7:00p. Culture Shock Youth, Fri @ 7:00p. 780-992-9673.





Fellowship Baptist Church. Pastor Jim Paulson. Worship Service: Sun @ 10:30a. Prayer: Tues @ 7:00p. Awana Children’s Program Thurs @ 6:30p. 9932 - 101 St., Fort Sask. (Ac. from Legacy Park) 780-992-0880. Church of the Nazarene. Pastor: Stephen Conklin. 9802 104 St., Fort Sask. 780-998-2451. Join us Sunday @ 11a for Worship. Sunday School @ 9:50a. Josephburg Community Church.21380 Township Road 550 (intersection of Twp. Rd. 550 & Sec. Highway 830) Aas you enter the hamlet of Josephburg. Ph: 780998-9331 Fax: 780-998-9305 Pastor: Rev. Audrey Daley Partridge Hill United Church. Corner of TWP 542 and RR 220. 780-895-7378. Debbie Brill, Minister. Worship Service: 9:30am. First United Church. 10409-100 Ave., Fort Sask. 780998-4060. Rev. Danielle A. James. All welcome. Sunday Worship & Sunday School: 10:00a. Holy Protection Orthodox Church. Saturdays: Great Vespers, 5p. Sundays: Divine Liturgy, 10a. 281 Fort Mall, 10421 99 Ave. 780-708-2877. All Services in English. St. George’s Anglican Church. Reverend Maude Parsons-Horst. Regular worship times: Sunday @ 8:30am Holy Communion (BCP) and 10:30am Holy Communion (BAS) with Sunday School. 10029 – 99th Ave, Ph: 780998-3620.

HEART AND SOUL, CONT. We made sure the tide was right so, just in case you did lose your grip on your bike, you could dive down and retrieve it. Yep, everything was good, as long as you made it home for supper... Sometimes, I just never quite had the heart to tell my poor mom that we spent the day terrorizing people with our goofy stunts, but other days I didn’t have to... she would just simply find out because she knew everyone on the Island. I really got an earful once when someone saw us climbing the big powerline towers... on a drizzly day, no less... that day, when we got close to the power line (high voltage lines) we

could hear them humming and sizzling. We thought maybe it would be best that we got down -- after all electricity is a little dangerous you know... Ya... we didn’t do that one again, but it sure was a great view up there! Sometimes God just sends a few extra angels to help us out a little... even when we don’t think He might have a plan for our lives and would like us to live a little longer. We did this stuff and there weren’t even cameras around, and we survived. The Bible tells us that indeed God sets Angels over us. It’s probably best not to overwork them though; you need to make it home for supper! Have a great week!

ODDS, SODS, CONT. Drunk driving is not much better. MADD put the message out there “Don’t Drink And Drive”. Great message. Too bad that it does not seem to be getting through to the ones that need to pay attention to it. Again, by the time you get to your third conviction, they will “get tough on you”. By the THIRD time? Wow. As with everything that I have written about here, if you do the crime, you should do the time. Is that a perfect answer? No. But as a society, we need to start somewhere. Get involved, everyone! Cheers for now. And remember, what I have written here, consider it food for thought.

Over Easy, Please

March 15, 2013

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Biscuits and Gravy: Glimmer of Hope By BRIAN MASON

Ever see t h o s e movies where a feller is walkin’ along the b e a c h and spots somethin’ shinny and glittery in the sand? It’s rather iconic really, signalling either Robin Williams is about to break into song from a piece of granny’s bronzewear that’s been sittin’ on the shelf since Christ was in high school, or some lost gem from a distant land that turns into somethin’ my little cousin found in the gum dispenser at Walmart. But regardless of what it is, somehow it becomes the focus of the story and ultimately someone later on ends up runnin’ a rabbit and we forget all about the shinny thing in the first place. Well guess what, folks? It’s gonna happen again. You see, back when I was a young whippersnapper (somethin’ my nanny always referred to me as even up to the point she shoved me into the ocean) my dad was walkin’ along the beach in search of a good fishin’ spot in the surf. We were, as we always did, vacationing on Santa Rosa Island just off the coast of Pensac-

ola, Florida in the Gulf of Mexico. I was nowhere to be seen, likely darting through one of the old gun batteries on the other side of the island, Lord only knew where. While dad was walkin’, he noticed something sparkle and blind him in the sunlight from the sand. Well, he didn’t think much of it, but like all warm blooded people his brain hollered “Shiny!” and away he went to investigate. Upon a closer examination he found a ring gently nestled in the snow white sand, a very loose sand - so much so that he nearly lost sight of the ring when he reached down. The ring had a very large stone atop it, and dad thought for sure this had to be costume jewelry or something a kid got out of those candy dispensers. He went to show mom and figured to be on the safe side, he’d take it to the Ranger station nearby and report a found item. Mom agreed, sayin’ that it looked nicer than a kid’s toy, so figured it must be one of those cubic zirconium stones. Either way, maybe someone would miss the ring. Dad got to the station and handed em the ring. The Ranger said it would be unlikely anyone would have filled a lost item report; after all, the beach is like a pack rat hole, once somethin’ goes in and you don’t see it anymore, you ain’t gettin’ it back til’ it thunders. Well, you might, but you’ll be missin’ a couple of fingers, but that’s another story.

Dad was told that if no one claimed it within a certain time then they would give him the ring. Not thinkin’ much else of it, he left, and we continued our vacation. Well, we got home and dad got a call and later a letter. Come to find out the ring had actually been lost by a lady a couple of years previous. The ring as it turned out was genuine real, and was her engagement ring, one she still had not lost hope of regaining and so hadn’t replaced it as of yet. She was so overjoyed for dad not only finding it, but returning it, that she had sent him a reward. Dad was overjoyed, not at the reward mind you, but at the hope that this woman had held on to all that time and also the joy that he had helped bring back to her life. The ring had meant something special to her, and though the obstacles seemed great, she still held onto the hope that one day the ring would return to her. You see folks, we all go through shadowed and troubled times in our lives. We all have those moments that it seems nothing can pull us through, where certainly there is no hope for a glimmer of light to return to our lives. Well folks, it only takes one little sparkle to turn the course of our lives. It only takes one sparkle to pull us off that path we were on and bring a new light, a glimmer of hope back into view, and back into our hearts.

Live DJ every Thursday and Friday. Make your requests! Flimsy Whimsy: Foul By JAI MURUGAN

I’ve alw a y s considered the phrase ‘foul play’ a paradox. ‘Play’ suggests frivolity. When the headline screams, “Inspector Wise Suspects Foul Play!” in the sudden disappearance of Izzy Gone, I don’t believe the reader is conjuring up lazy days at the beach observing kids splashing water joyously while sneaking peaks at buxom volleyballers diving in the sand. I don’t think Dad’s eyes are closing after a gruelling day’s work, too tired to read past the headline, and dreaming of those long past days of frolicking in a soft haystack full of chums or playing Go Fetch with Skipper the energetic diligent throw-it-again black Lab.

Boys & Girls Club Fundraising. Helen Bourget, owner of Blondes, Brunettes and Redheads Salon showing the pink thumbnail campaign donation jar at her salon. Nearly $500 was raised for the Club at the 4th and 5th Mayors Tea, and throughout the month of February. Photo: Reece Sellin

Then again, maybe I’m wrong. Maybe the rest of society thinks murder, kidnapping, and other unmentionables are the bully’s oftstated version of “I was just playin’ around.” Maybe

‘foul play’ is as meaningless as the home team’s losing another game in a 31 game losing streak, or the second page’s full page advertisement including all the superlative adjectives the world’s most superlative thesaurus can contain. Maybe it’s me that has the vision from the headline all reversed in dyslexic nonlogic transference. For my vision is more slimy and gruesome than that. It’s more like a twisted gravel road with mangled bridges, hog farms to the left, polluting refineries to the right, beer bottles strewn in sludgy ditches, corpses floating amidst the oily bubbly rubble, Izzy’s red hair the cruel attribute for his immediate recognition and later identification. I think we should toss the paradox out, maybe into the aforementioned sludgy ditch to join with other old nonsensical sayings. Replace it with more apt phrases like ‘brutal action’, ‘disturbing consequence’, ‘wicked end’ or even the ever growing in commonality, ‘bad karma’. Then jolted-by-headlines imaginations might retain some sense of consistency. Then again perhaps these words are so engrained in gossiper’s minds that change isn’t possible. Except where otherwise copyrighted, all content of this newspaper, including advertisements, is Copyright 2012, Tuckbook Inc. Editor: Judy Sellin (; Senior Editor: Reece Sellin (reece@; Advertising Inquiries: (; Mail: PO Box 20005, Fort Saskatchewan, AB, T8L 4C8; Phone: 780-9340139; Fax: 780-589-1188.

Over Easy, Please - March 15, 2013  

Fort Saskatchewan, Alberta's Weekend Newspaper