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Eye Candy






Like most passionate pundits, I assume I could do a better job in my chosen field than the decision makers, but television is one of the few subjects on which nearly everyone has an opinion, or theories for improvement. The most immediate changes would include to hire back Ross and Brand and vow never to bow to tabloid pressure again. Stop squeezing the closing credits to make way for plugs. Ensure clip shows only feature people who know what they're talking about. Bring back Saturday morning TV. Ask John Barrowman to stop shouting. Allow Charlie Brooker to do whatever he wants. Rebrand Sky Arts -which shows some great documentaries- into a new BBC4.

“Both BBC and Channel Four are sitting on vast and exciting archives of great, interesting creative output which hasn't been seen in ages...” Curb the amount of programmes about fat people and vile kids (or 'challenged' kids as the media likes to say), and let's not call this sort of stuff documentaries anymore(that puts it into the same category as Spellbound or Bowling for Columbine). Move any programme about people buying houses away from primetime and dump it into daytime where they belong leaving primetime free for original scripted programming. Develop an intelligent interesting daytime show like Ellen or Oprah to replace Useless Women. No more 'padding' shows (like Wife Swap:Aftermath, Big Brother's Little Brothers' Big Mouth Extra). And , of course, create more one-off quality dramas, such as those seen on BBC4 and broadcast them on BBC1 or BBC2 where they can find a decent size audience.

Top of the list though, and the one heard most often, must be to reduce the number of channels. Out of the hundreds of channels available, only a few have any real identity broadcasting significant output, and only a handful distribute anything close to original programming, an increasingly rare concept amongst British satellite. One channel unloads its repeats onto another and the rest just act as a dumping ground; Gold passes stuff onto Dave, ITV2 onto ITV3. It's understandable that television must rely on repeats to bulk up the schedules, but why must it be the same few repeats in constant rotation? Both BBC and Channel Four are sitting on vast and exciting archives of great, interesting creative output which hasn't been seen in ages and surely every TV fan can think of a programme they'd love to see again but instead we're stuck with the usual faces on the same old programmes as television is constantly diluted and regurgitated... REECE



WIN a copy of the The Lair: Season One DVD box set

Season One box set available from TLA on 2nd February, £14.99rrp Exclusively created for the American gay cable network Here! this campy, sexy, gothic six-parter is pure soapy guilty pleasure, more sexed-up Dark Shadows than gay Buffy. A reporter for a local newspaper becomes entangled in a series of odd events which all seem to be connected to a 'private sex club' called The Lair. The club is overseen by Peter Stickles (Shortbus), who seems to believe the reporter painted his Dorian Graylike portrait over 200 years ago, and is a den for the undead. No rotting zombies here, though, only the hottest flawless undead need apply. Directed and created by Fred Olen Ray (the straight-to-video auteur

behind 1980's hits like Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers) and featuring porn star Colton Ford (clothed but hot in a cops uniform and, yes, he can act) the melodrama is played relatively straight-faced, never verging into self-conscious camp. The pace needs picking up, though, and the minimal adult movie sets as well as the over-done tendency for vampires to really tip their heads back to bear their fangs cheapen the production. The cable-level bare-assed sex scenes are uninspired when too often accompanied by a porn soundtrack the rock soundtrack works a lot better- but The Lair remains a surprisingly more-ish and original attempt to create something different for the gay market. REECE

Courtesy of those generous folks at TLA Releasing, we’ve got a copy of the sexy vampire drama The Lair: Season One to give away to a lucky reader. To be in with a chance, just tell us the names (first names will do!) of the prominent lesbian couple from Buffy The Vampire Slayer. Send your answers to the address on page 4, or email them to: 45



â?? BLACKPOOL & CLASSIFIEDS continued â?‘ BARBERS/HAIRDRESSING PAUL'S Unisex hairdresser 5 General Street. FY1 1RW 01253 290928


DARAN HAIRDRESSING Gay owned 10 Edward Street. FY1 1BA 01253 441000

LISTINGS ARE BEING UPDATED! outnorthwest is constantly updating these listings. If your details are incorrect, or you would like to be added to the listings, please contact

EVOLUTION HAIR STUDIO Gay owned 255 Dickson Road. FY1 2JH 01253 620677

â?‘ GARDEN CENTRES THE GARDEN PLACE Gay Owned Cropper Road, FY4 5LB 01253 699987


Some hotels share map numbers due to space restrictions

SMILE SPA AT HELIO FITNESS Newton Drive, Blackpool 01253 393909 HANDYBEAR Light deliveries and odd jobs 07880 743385

BROOKLYN 7 Wilton Parade 01253 627003


BARCIA HOTEL 40-42 Egerton Rd 01253 623130


HONEYCOMBE SAUNA 97-107 Egerton Rd FY1 2NN 01253 752211


GRAMPIAN HOUSE 4 Pleasant St 01253 291648


SHADOWLANDS Pleasant St 01253 625707

7 7 7

NEW BOND 72 Lord St 01253 628123 ASH LEA HOTEL 76 Lord St 01253 628161 GABRIELLE’S (Lesbian) 77 Lord St 01253 295565 WESTFIELD HOUSE 78 Lord St 01253 621992 LENBROOK 69 Lord St 01253 626737 THE WILCOT HOTEL 80 Lord St 01253 621101 PARK HOUSE 81 Lord St 01253 314571 ASTOR HOTEL 83-85 Lord St 01253 290669 COLIN’S 9 Cocker St 01253 620541 LONSDALE HOTEL 25 Cocker St 01253 621628

8 9 10 10 10 11 12

34 35 36 37 37



TREMADOC 127 Dickson Rd 01253 624001


31 32 33





BLACKPOOL LGBT READING GROUP Blackpool Central Library, Queen Street, Blackpool Meetings every last Thursday of each month at 6.30pm /Blackpool4Me/Community/ LGBT/LGBTReadingGroup THE RENAISSANCE TRANSGENDER SUPPORT GROUP meetings twice monthly. Renaissance Web-site & Forum renaissance_transgender_forum.htm

25 26 27 28 29

13 WORCESTER HOUSE 22 Cocker St 01253 620007 14 PIER VIEW 16 Banks St 01253 624560 15 HIGHBANK HOTEL 46 Banks St 01253 294797 15 WARWICK HOLIDAY FLATS 01253 623787 16 SANDYLANDS 47 Banks St 01253 294670 17 WILLOWFIELD 51 Banks St 01253 623406 18 LYNMAR 74 High St 01253 290046 19 LEGENDS HOTEL 45 Lord St 01253 620300 19 MARDI GRAS 41 Lord St 01253 751087 19 BRENE HOTEL 37 Lord Street 01253 621854 19 RUBENS HOTEL 39 Lord St 01253 622920 19 SEACROFT SUITES 27 Lord St 01253 628304 19 NEVADA 23 Lord St 01253 290700 20 GUYZ 16 Lord St 01253 622488 21 NORTHERN STAR 9 Lord St 01253 628073

15 WARWICK 39 Bank St 01253 623787 23 CHAUCER 59 High St 01253 299099 24 TRADES 51 Lord St Men only 01253 626401

KINGSMEAD 58 Lord St 01253 624496 BELVEDERE 77 Dickson Rd 01253 624733 DIXON 84 Dickson Rd 01253 752379 VIDELLA 80 Dickson Rd 01253 621201 THORNCLIFFE 63 Dickson Rd 01253 622508 WINDSOR HOUSE 47 Dickson Rd 0870 620 7000 EDWARD 27 Dickson Rd 01253 624271 JR’S 25 Dickson Rd 01253 752333 STRATFORD 72-74 Dickson Rd 01253 624020 ASHBEIAN 49 High St 01253 626301 ATHOL 3 Mount St 01253 624918 GRANBY LODGE 5 Lord St 01253 627842 HEATHERDALE LODGE 2 Pleasant St 01253 626268 GRAMPIAN HOUSE B&B 4 Pleasant Street, 01253 291648 WOODLEIGH 11 Yates St 01253 624997 ANCHORAGE 18 Withnell Rd 01253 341771 LYNDALE COURT HOTEL 01253 354033 CAMELOT 80 Hornby Rd 01253 620518 SUNNYSIDE 16 Charles St 01253 622983 SHAFTESBURY 26 Shaftesbury Ave 01253 352453 MERECLIFF HOTEL 24 Holmfield Rd 01253 356858 (See main map) VILLAGE HOTEL 14 Springfield Road, 01253 290840 McHALL’S HOTEL 5/7 Lord Street, 01253 625661 PRIDE LODGE 12 High St, Blackpool 01253 314752 THE GYNWAY HOTEL 205 Dickson Rd 01253 314747 SUSSEX HOTEL 14-16 Pleasant Street North Shore 01253 627824 VALENTINE HOTEL 35 Dickson Road, FY1 2AT 01253 622775 DERBY HOTEL, 2 Derby Road 01253 623708

"10!,2+ % Meet at 2pm, 2nd Sunday of every other month in Manchester’s Gay Village. Next meetings: 8th March, 10th May Enjoy a lazy Sunday afternoon, chill & chat over good food and a bottle of wine.

For info. or to reserve a place Tel 0781 308 3242 email


80 Lord St Blackpool FY1 2DG



Issue 89 of outnorthwest is available across the north west of England from Wednesday 28th January 2009.

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