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Volume 16 • Issue 1 MAY 4-15, 2012 www.facebook.com/odysseymagazine www.odysseymagazine.net

on the cover... Matinée Las Vegas Festival Photo by Rick Day contents... T HE C O LUMN . S NEE TC H Y V I VA . G O G O G O. WHO? M AT INEE V EGA S . T HE W IG S . T HE P O R N . HOROSCOPES. the family... Publisher Creative Director Editor in Chief Design Director Advertising Director The Wigs The Porn The Music Outstars Photographer At Large

Mike Everaert Brian J. McCarthy Cheyne Hauk Jay Cribas Joshua Miller Barbie Q scotty B Will Ihavetochangemyname Mrs. Hello Brenden-John

7985 santa monica bl. #447 • West hollyWood, ca 90046 tel 201.839.5209 • ads@odysseymagazine.net

National Advertising Rep. Rivendell Media 212.242.6863

Odyssey Magazine is published bi-weekly in Los Angeles and New York; monthly in Hawaii. All material herein is copyrighted 2012 Odyssey Magazine. Reprint by permission only. For more information regarding advertising, please call: 201.839.5209 or email ads@odysseymagazine. net. No implication regarding sexual orientation or personal practices of contributors or advertisers appearing in this publication is intended and none should be inferred by the reader.

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HOSTED BY:

ANDERSON BROOKS

BILLY BURGESS

MUSIC BY:

CEASER GOMEZ

PERFORMANCES BY: DJ NELSTAR RHEA LITRE

BOBBY TRENDY

FUBAR

ALLUSIA

VICKY VOX MAYHEM

DETOX

KIKI XTRAVAGANZA

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THE “F” LIST “F” IS FOR FAGGOT, PROUD...FAGGOTS...MARY!

1. PrezBarackObama 2. H.S.H.Cher 3. Neil Patrick Harris 4. H.S.H. Andy Cohen 5. Don Pat Rogers 6. Don David Cooley 7. Don Sam Sharif 8. Don Jeffrey Sanker 9. Don Sam Nazarian 10. H.S.H. Elton John 11. DustinLanceBlk 12. Ellen Degeneres 13. David Geffen 14. Bryan Singer 15. Bryan Lourd 16. Brian Graden 17. James Duke Mason 18. Don Paul Nicholls 19 DonBrettHenrichson 20. Don Tom Whitman 21. DonOrlandorPuerta 22. DVDJ Ray Rhodes 23. Don Jason Lavitt 24. Mike Nava & David 25. Don Wayne Castro 26. Michael Brown 27. Don Anthony Lopez 28. Don Richard Grossi 29. Tim Meepegama 30. Chris Diamond 31. Wayne Elias 32. Eduardo Cordova 33. Walter Delmar 34. Dale Warner 35. Woody Woodbeck 36. Jay Krimis 37. Stefano Rossi 38. Don Jim Murphy 39. Rusty Updegraff 40. HSH LdyGaGa 41.HSH Lady Bunny 42.HSH Adam Lambert 43.HSH Jake Shears 44.HSH AlexisArquette 45.HSH Candy Ass 46.HSH Jackie Beat 47.HSH Chi Chi LaRue 48.HSH Momma 49.HSH Chad Michaels 50.HSH Raja

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51. Cellulosic Ethanol 52. Don Wanda Sykes 53. Don Chaz Bono 54. apples Tim Cook 55. Sham Ibrahim 56. Perez Hilton 57. Don Kathy Griffin 58. Lourdes Eyebrow 59. H.S.H. Divine. 60. DonRachelMaddow 61. James St. James 62. Johnny Weir 63. The Rock 64. Andrew Christian 65. Sandra Bernhard 66. Lawrence Odonald 67. Jay Cribas 68. Margaret Cho 69. Aaron Bradshaw 70. Jude Tade 71. Caesar Torres 72. Ricky Martin 73. Ross Matthews 74. John Waters 75. Michael Stipe 76. Alan Cumming 77. Melissa Etheridge 78. Ron Madril 79. Andy Bell 80. Jane Lynch 81. George Takei 82. Michael Moloney 83. Luis & Jim Turner 84. Lance Bass 85. Rob Halford 86. Wilson Cruz 87. Bruce Villanch 88. Gus Van Sant 89. Greg Louganis 90. Clay Aiken 91. Marc Almond 92. Cynthia Nixon 93. SaintHarveyMilk 94. MissQuintin Crisp 95. HSH Oscar Wilde 96. GeorgeClooney!! 97. Oprah&Gayhell 98. Brad & TrAnjolie 99. JanetJackoWissam 100. Mrs&MrsTomCruise

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Welcome!! Welcome!! All you queer boys and girls, go ahead!!! Step right up on the Odyssey Magazine gossip Mary-go-round with your host, the number one dirt-disher, Shamantha Cox!!! What’s this?? Lady GaGa is back on tour!! Mother monster opened her biiig “Born This Way” tour to a sold out crowd in glamorous Seoul, Korea!! And, she’s managed to build the biggest stage ever built on a world tour!!! Is there no end to her fame?? In other super star concert news, Jennifer Lopez is touring with Enrique Iglesias, but they still haven’t decided who will get top billing!! Sounds like a big power top fight to me!! Sorry, Enrique, everyone knows J-Lo is all top and you are all bottom, Mary!! Uh oh!! It looks like Britney Spears is still negotiating her deal to be a judge on “X Factor”!! Sources close to the negotiations say she is close to signing the $15 million deal - if producers agree to all her HIGH maintenance demands!! Demi Lovato, Avril Lavigne, LeAnn Rimes, and Fergie are also in negotiations with “X Factor” to fill the OTHER vacant judge seat on the show, but they are not being offered anywhere near the amount of money as Britney!! Problem time!! Bobby Brown says he isn’t to blame for Whitney Houston’s deadly drug habit claiming, “That was part of her life BEFORE we got together.” Brown just appeared on the “Today Show” and told Matt Lauer, “I didn’t get high [on narcotics] before I met Whitney ... I smoked weed and drank beer ... but no, I wasn’t the one that got Whitney on drugs ... I’m not the reason she’s gone.” In other Whitney news, her exboyfriend, Ray J, just inked a deal to be the new face of Princereigns shaving serum....and he got a cool $1 million for it!! Wow!! Angelina Jolie is busy filming Les Miserables with Russell Crowe, and on-set sources say her children Zahara, Maddox, and Pax spent lots of time playing with Russell on the set!! One source even heard the children say he was more fun than their real Dad!! Hmm... I wonder how daddy, Brad Pitt, feels about that!! Sports authority!! L.A. Lakers star, Jordan Hill, turned himself in to authorities—after allegedly choking out his girlfriend during a nuclear argument!!! In other bad sports news, NFL legend Junior Seau was found dead from an alleged suicide!! He killed himself by shooting himself in the chest!! The strange thing is there have been OTHER NFL suicides in the recent past—62-year-old former Atlanta Falcons player, Ray Easterling shot himself last month in his Virginia home; and 50-year-old former Chicago Bears player, Dave Duerson, was found dead in his Florida home last year from a self-inflicted gunshot wound to the chest. Hmm... Something smells fishy with all these NFL suicides by gunshot stories!! Joe Jackson, child beating sensation and father to Michael Jackson, the greatest star of all time, has closed down his perfume kiosk that he was running at a Las Vegas Mall!! Rumor has it he

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closed shop because he feels the mall has treated him poorly by charging him unfair rent and giving him the worst spot in the mall to sell the perfume!! Huh?? Superstar Vanessa Williams stirred up some controversy after she criticized the show “Toddlers & Tiaras”!! Well, Wendy Dickey, who is the mother of the show’s star, Paisley, spoke out against Vanessa and pointed out that since Vanessa has posed nude and has had an abortion, she shouldn’t be so judgmental!! Naomi Campbell, who??? Cindy Crawford, what?? The latest model that’s taking all the press is 19 year old, Kate Upton, the NEW face of Sports Illustrated’s swimsuit issue!! Look out girls, Kate’s star is rising fast, and rumor has it Hollywood producers are looking to cast her in some feature films!! Yikes!! Robert Herjavec, one of the big wigs on “Shark Tank”, slammed his ultra-fast $350,000 Ferrari into a wall at 130 MPH!!! Needless to say, the expensive car is totaled, kind of like Joan Rivers’ face!! Oh dear...Wiz Khalifa was busted for high end reefer possession twice in 10 days!! The WinstonSalem Police Department in North Carolina ticketed the rapper for possession of marijuana before his concert there last night!! Now, he’s got a hefty ticket, a court date, and lots of drug publicity to deal with!! Oh wow!! It looks like best president Barack Obama’s worst enemy, Mitt Romney, was considering hosting Saturday Night Live, but decided not to!! Shamantha Cox suspects it’s because he is already enough of a joke and doesn’t need to go up on NBC’s top rated show to further prove the point!! OBAMA ONLY IN 2012!! Baby’s on fire!! Top actor and producer Tyler Perry’s movie studio in Atlanta caught on fire!! Luckily, there were no injuries, but the fire was so bad one building on the lot almost collapsed!! Scary!! Nadya Suleman, aka Octo-mom, has signed on to do a solo masturbation porno!! Yikes!! Pop Queen Madonna received an unwanted visit from a knife wielding, retired firefighter named Robert Linhart in 2010!! Authorities quickly arrested the man and he faced all kinds of criminal charges!! Now, A New York judge ruled yesterday that the District Attorney’s Office can re-file charges against him!! In other stalker news, former television star, Kat Von D, called the police to her LA home after a creepy stalker sent her threatening phone messages saying he was inside her house!! It looks like a slaying is in the forecast! And, I’m not talking about another unsolved Hollywood murder!! Men in Black 3, starring Will Smith and Josh Brolin, is almost ready to hit the theaters and everyone is saying it is going to kill the competition at the box office!! Taylor Swift was spotted Tuesday looking dumpy and dressed down, taking a casual walk around lovely Santa Monica!! She looked very low key and was just having a quiet time with friendsa far cry from her recent appearances at all sorts of hard-partying night clubs in Hollywood!!

What’s this?? Russell Brand’s ex-wife, Katy Perry, just signed a deal with Pepsi to be her major sponsor in her upcoming film, “Part of Me 3D”!! It was stars only at Coldplay’s latest concert in LA!! Everyone from Robert Downey, Jr. to Mandy Moore, Billy Crystal, Ashley Greene, James Belushi and Cuba Gooding Jr. showed up to the Hollywood Bowl to watch Gwyneth Paltrow’s husband’s band tear up the stage!! Oh boy!! It’s official! Charlie Sheen’s new TV show, “Anger Management”, is set to premier on the FX network in June, and rumor has it, his dad, Martin Sheen, is involved in the show! Anniversary time!! Prince William and Kate Middleton spent their one year anniversary waking up together in a beautiful, Suffolk country inn close to the English coast!! Oops!! Prison break star, Lane Garrison, is back in jail!! He is still on parole from his infamous vehicular manslaughter D.U.I. problem where he got drunk with a bunch of high school kids and crashed his car into a tree on an alcohol run, killing one of the teens!! Well, this time he attacked his ex-girlfriend and Playboy model, Ashley Mattingly, and he’s back in the big house locked up until parole board officials lift his no-bail hold!! It’s love, love, and more love between Kim Kardashian and Kanye West!! The super famous couple has been making lots of public appearances to show the world that they really are together and happy, happy, happy!! Wow! “Dancing With The Stars” winner, J.R. Martinez, and his girlfriend, Diana GonzalezJones, just gave birth to a beautiful baby girl!! In other baby news, Donald Trump Jr. and his wife, Vanessa Trump, are expecting baby number four!! It’s not cheap being famous and having a baby, by the way!! Jessica Simpson’s new baby girl was born in a luxury birthing suite at Cedars Sinai that costs over $5,000 a day!! That’s more than what Beyoncé spent!! The former Destiny’s Child spent $3,200 a night on her luxury, 4 bedroom birthing hospital room!! Too bad things don’t always go as planned!! Usher and his ex-wife, Tameka Raymond, have gotten an ultimatum in their custody war over their young children!! They’ve been at the Atlanta courthouse trying to settle it, and if they can’t, the judge is going to lay down the law!! Wow!! David Beckham celebrated his 37th birthday with his wife, Victoria Beckham, and their children at home with a low key celebration that included breakfast in bed served and prepared by his two young sons!! Heroes only!! Patrick Dempsey helped save a teenager’s life by pulling him out of his wrecked car after it crashed in Malibu!! Wheee!! The Hollywood circus sure keeps all the stars spinning with problems and publicity!! Thanks for joining us on this high end gossip go-round!! Don’t clown around!! Remember, Odyssey Magazine is the funnest and best source for nightlife needs, food cravings, and of course gossip goodies!! See you in two weeks!!!

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go go go MONDAY

TUESDAY

WEDNESDAY

THURSDAY

MUSTACHE MONDAYS! La Cita 336 S Hill, LA. Hot New DJ Josh Peace, Total Freedom! facebook.com/ mustachemondays SHOWGIRLS! Mickys 8857 SM Blvd 310.657.1176. Fine Top Tranny Review SEXY BITCH Rage 8911 SM Blvd 310.652.7055 Pop & hip hop with Aubrey! HOT MESS MONDAYS Panama Joes 5100 E.2nd St. LB. 562.434.7417 DANDY Beauty Bar 1638 N Cahuenga Where LA & NYC Club Fashion come together. DJ Manny Patel Jr, Wayne Castro $10 martini & mani special MONDAY MADNESS Alibi East 225 South San Antonio Ave, Pomona GODDESS MJ’s 2810 Hyperion SL 323.660.1503 Leslie Monroy & T-girls POPCORN The Abbey 692 N Robertson Bl 310. 289-8410 DJRayRhodes DREAMGIRLS REVUE HM 740 E Broadway LB 562.436.7900. 9p show ISRAEL’S CANTINA Chico 2915 W Beverly Blvd, Montebello 323.721.3401 Happy Hour prices all night long! CHEAP & EASY Paradise Piano Bar 1800 Broadway Blvd LB 562.436.2433 EL CONQUISTADOR 3701 W Sunset Blvd. SL 323.666.5136 Mon-Thu Happy Hour 4-6:30pm with hors d’ouvres! Lunch Tues-Sun 11am ASIAN NIGHT 1350 Club 510 W Anaheim St, Wilmington. $8 lockers from 5pm10pm 6-hr rental 310.830.4784 STRIP PARTIES Midtowne 615 Kohler, downtown 213.680.1838 1/2 PRICE ROOMS Melrose Spa 7269 Melrose 323.937.2122. $13.50 RUPAUL MONDAYS Club Ripples in LB 5101 E Ocean Blvd. 2 For 1 Well’s, $2 Jello Shots, No Cover

RIM JOB! MJ’s 2810 Hyperion SL 323.660.1503. Nice & sleazy go-go guys. Cuz eatin’ ain’t cheatin’. www. anthonylopezpresents.com DREAM GIRLS Rage 8911 SM Blvd 310.652.7055. THE O.G. SHOW! MANHOLE Motherlode 8944 SM Blvd 310.659.9700 HipHop w/DJ Ben Dirty Burty’s “Dirty Dancers” and monthly “Hot Hole” Contest!! MR BLACK LA Bardot 1737 Vine St. This NYC legend lands on the coast Luke Nero’s O.G. Dance Den goes off with Rusty U., Lenora C., and Gregory A! RECESS Eleven Nightclub 8811 SM ClubTigerheat.com gets back to the playgay ground hottest 18+ with DJ’s Ray Rhodes and Howie T. LIPTICKLER Mickys 8857 S.M. Blvd lipticklerguestlist@gmail.com RIDE! KARAOKE Velvet Lounge 416 W 4th St Santa Ana, CA Karen Cobb! BOYS NIGHT OUT Circus 6655 SM Blvd 323.462.1291 L.A.’s Tues Tradition, hot papis abound. DJ Ernie Pearl. $3 cover! KARAOKE Fubar 7994 SM Blvd 323.654.0396 Fresh Comedy Mic Night with Bruce Daniels and Cher Madonna gets the boys to wail! HAMBURGER MARYS Latino Heat 8288 SM Blvd 323.654.3800 Taco Bar! and Chocolate Fountain... Cholos toooo! T-GIRL HM 740 E. Broadway LB 562.436.7900 T- Girl Tuesdays Packed TIPSY TIPSY TUES Ripples 5101 E Ocean LB $3 well Vodka $4 Jäger KARAOKE Alibi East 225 S San Antonio Ave, Pomona. Taco Tues on the patio Karaoke 9pm-1am No Cover! GANG BANG Faultline 4216 Melrose Ave. S.L. 323.660.0889. Music, video, hot boys, cheap happy hour ‘til Midnight. 1/2 PRICE ROOMS Midtowne 615 Kohler DT 213.680.1838. $15 THE MINESHAFT 1720 E Broadway LB 562.436.2433. Beer Specials & Free Pool! Wall to wall LB Babes always on Tops Only! TEQUILA RM East West Lounge 8851 SM Blvd. Tequila from Jalisco México YOU CALL IT Flux 17817 Lakewood Blvd Bellflower 562.633.6394. All top shelf premiums only $3. This is a hot pocket of papis. Check it out! MARIX TACO TUESDAYS! Marix WEHO 1108 N Flores St 323.656.8800. ALLYOU-CAN EAT TACO bar only $7.95.

STRIPPER CIRCUS Here 696 N Robertson Blvd 310.360.8455. BABES! Paul Nicholls and Woody Woodbeck turn this new humpday humpier! HOT ROD! Mickys 8857 Santa Monica 310.657.1176 Stefano Rossi RULES! FUEGO Rage 8911 SM Blvd 310.652.7055 DJ Salvador keeps the ChicosHot. COCKTAILS W.THE STARS! Mickys 8857 SM 310.657.1176. ScottyB This legendary Industry Flesh fest is landin on humpday with Stefano too! 25 CENT BEER!!! Club Ripples 5101 E Ocean Blvd 562.433.0357 25 Cent Beer, BBQ, Music Videos, Dance Music, Fun, No Cover NEON BLACKOUT! Eleven Nightclub 8811 SM Blvd - 310.855.0800 Gay Glow Lights and Bright beats ! Mykee Be & Wayne Castro Fresh lil’ humpin’ FLASHBACK Trunks 8809 SM Blvd 310.652.1015 Igenue and DJ Draven! CHERRY Velvet Lounge 416 W 4th StSanta Ana, CA 92701 LADIES NIGHT INFERNO Cobra 10937 Burbank Blvd (at Vineland) 818.760.9798 BiLatinMen. com DJ Aaron Hernandez. Pop, HipHop, Dance and Top 40 CLUB METRO MJ’s 2810 Hyperion 323.660.1530 R&B Ivan Daniels! WILD WEDS! HM 740 E. Broadway LB 562.436.7900. 18+ Wild Wed and Starlette Revue Jewels hosts COCKFIGHT Cobra 10937 Burbank Blvd. 818.760.9798 Hot Hot NoHo! MARGARITA MADNESSRoosterfish 1302 Abbott Kinney, Venice. $3.00 Cuervo Gold Margaritas all day long! Cute beach gay babes. BINGO! Hamburger Mary’s Weho 8288 SM Blvd 323.654.3800. Fierce celebrity ball throw-down. Check out the hotties and drink specials! KENNY’S KARAOKE Fiesta Cantina 8865 Santa Monica Bl. Starts 10pm. New groovy jungle local. This is “The” Karaoke ! Let it Rip Gurl! 2-4-1drinks! DELICIOUS Arena 6655 SM Blvd 323.692.3636. Ghetto Hip-Hop R&B, Merengue Room. 18+. DJ Manny C. FLASHBACK WEDS Melrose Spa 7269 Melrose Ave. $8 lockers from 5p-11p (6 hr-rental) Cheap Fun SEX Slurp! 1/2 PRICE ROOMS 1350 Club 510 W Anaheim St, Wilmington 310.830.4784. Rooms $14.50, lockers $12.50 for 6-hours 18+ / $3 Drinks & $4 Premiums Oasis 1386 Foothill Bl. Upland 909.920.9590. Drink cheap and get it all going on humpday!

TIGERHEAT & HEAVEN The Avalon 1735 Vine St. Hollywood. 18+. DJs Jason Lavitt, Ray Rhodes and Howie T. RULE. www.clubtigerheat.com BIG FAT DICK! Fubar 7994 SM Blvd. Mario Diaz gives you buckets o’ jazz with DJ Riley Moore spinning out of “cocktrol”. PAPI CALIENTE Velvet 416 W 4th St Santa Ana 714.664.0663 Dj Derek CLUB NUR MJ’s 2810 Hyperion SL. 323.660.1503. Hot steamy sexy sandbox! Gevo and Hrair Hookah you some desert dick! RAGE 18+ 8911 SM Blvd 310.652.7055. 18 & ova star type young fresh chickens! Daddys! Drink Specials. PAN DULCE Micky’s 8857 SM Bl. 323.692.9573 Hot Latin boys! clubpapi.com SANCTUARY Abbey 684 Robertson Bl. 310.289.8410. Tom Whitman KYSS Here Lounge 696 Robertson 310.360.8455. DJ Lezlee and Asha ROCK N’ ROLL FAG BAR GYMBAR 8737 S.M. BLVD 310.654.2004 THE PLAYGIRLS SHOW Club Ripples in LBC 5101 E. Ocean Blvd. 562.433.0357 A Drag Show Spectacular, Karaoke, Martini Specials, Dancing, DJ RPM, $5 Cover LATIN NIGHT Executive Suite 3428 E PCH LB 562.597.388. $2.50 Coronas DOLL HOUSE HM 740 E. Broadway LB 562.436.7900. 18 + gurls! BURLESQUE SHOW HM. 8288 SM WH 323.654.3800. SNATCH Menagerie 3581 University Av w. Raven 951.788.8000 THURS. NIGHT DELIGHT VIP Nightclub 3673 Merrill Ave. 951.784.2370 Stripper. Sexiness, $5 all-u-can drink draft. Karaoke patio. THIRSTY THURSDAYS Trunks 8809 SM Blvd 310.652.1015 TRANZIT at Josephs 1775 Ivar St. Hollywood 818.660.9472 with Veronica resident Dj Jonney Miles big beats, tranzit_josephsnightclub@hotmail. com FRAT HOUSE 8112 Garden Grove Blvd G.G. 714.373.FRAT Hot Strip Shows Sat & Sun! Drag review on Saturdays! KLKPORN STAR J.O. PARTY Midtowne Spa. 615 Kohler LA 213.680.1838. 8pm. Big Porn. Industry slabs of beef! Dinner is served! DANCE IDOL Oasis Nightclub 1386 Foothill Blvd Upland 909.920.9590. 10 wk contest. Cash prizes – puta! C.FRENZ-KARAOKE (form.Bananas) 7026 Reseda Blvd. 818.996.2976 with Tony B. The best karaoke in the Valley! JEWELS BODYPARTS Falcon 1435 E Broadway LB 562.422.1928. $1beer

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LOOKER HOOKER GOGOS WELL SPUN IN THE HERE HOOKER CASINO

PRIMETIME’S DANTE PRIMES UP PORN PUPS TRISTAN JAXX & CALVIN KNIGHT

ALL AMERICAN GAY-AMBLIN’ BABES IN HERE’S SATURDAY HOOKER CASINO

HERE’S RING LEADER CAESAR TORRES KEEPS THE CROSS EYED, HEARIN’ HOOKERS ALL LINED UP FOR NO EVIL HERE… CASINO SATURDAYS!

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HO HERE LOUNGE SATURDAYS GETS THE GAYS ALL PACKIN’ & CASHING IN!

PRIMETIME GOGO VLADIMIR W. STALKER IN THE CIRCUS DISCO BIWEEKLY!

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go go go FRIDAY

SATURDAY

SUNDAY

FRESH VICE Eleven 8811 SM Bl.310.855.0800. Don J.S. and Steve Machuca 9pm. Cocktails. 11pm dancing with resident DJ Morningstar and VIP VICEsquad. HYPE Ultra Suede 661 N. Robertson Bl. Paul Nicholls Brings you the Biggest Performers from all over the world!! DJ Morningstar - hypevip@aol.com FRESH MEAT M.J.’s 2810 Hyperion 323.660.1530. $6 Drinks ‘til 12 TRUCKSTOP GIRLS 696 Robertson 310.360.8455. Linda gets this fine-ass Friday homo & Lezbo mix hang going! Always packed! ”BULLSH*T HMarys 8288 SM Bl. WH 323.654.3800 A DRAG SHOW, RULES! DANCE BITCH Fubar 7994 SM Blvd 323.654.0396. Hosted and DJ’d by The Gorgeous Gay Mobstars Billy Francesca and Herm’s homotley screw crew! GAMEBOI RAGE 8911 SM Blvd 310.652.7055. Packed every Friday! . 18+, 2 dance floor - playing Pop, Dance and Asian music videos all night. BOYSROOM via Tigerheat Executive Suite Nightclub 3428 E.PCH, L.B. 562.597.3884 21+. $3 beers/$4 vodkas + Red Bulls www.clubboysroom.com FLEX Velvet Lounge 416 W 4th St Santa Ana, 21 + OC BABES DANCerteria! ROOSTERFISH 1320 Abbott Kinney, Venice 310.392.2123. Beach Boy Babes out in droves! Blondes and butch! Drink specials. FUZZY 1123 Vine St. Hollywood Mario Diaz & Cody Bayne’s 2nd Fri. Butch STAG AT ROCKWELL 1714 Vermont Av 323.669.1550 rockwellvt.com CUB SCOUT Eagle LA 4219 SM Blvd 323.669.9472. Chris/Vic. 1st Fri. FILTH FRIDAYS Faultline 4216 Melrose Blvd 323.660.0889. DJ Matt Moody. Rockin Redneck Strip-pole. Pabst Beer Cans 9-2am CLUB HOMBRES Club Cobra 10937 Burbank Blvd. Showers! Undies Contest FAME Circus 6655 SM Blvd WEHO 323.721.1291. Latin, house, R&B. Latina Diva Karlota 9pm3:30am. 21+. The most caliente cholos! 18+ Oasis 1386 E Foothill Upland 909.920.9590. Beef stick! BOYBAR HMarys 740 E Broadway LB 562.436.7900. 18+ Hot gogo dancing DJ Zach Moos and Boy U. Baby Doll Go Go’s ! CLUB DIVA VIP Club 3673 Merrill Av Riverside 951.784.2370. Vanity Halston, Raven, Mayhem, Bridgette Diamond, Kiwi.. Krazy Gurls! 11pm ALIBI EAST 225 San Antonio Pomona 909.623.9422. Latin love! $2 domestic beers. Two DJs spinning afterhours ‘til 3am! Slammed & Sexy! FLASHBACK FRIDAYS Chico 2915 Beverly Blvd Montebello 323.721.3403. DJ Frank aka DJ TJ playing videos & old skool. $2 Coronas AZUCAR at C. Frenz (form.Bananas) 7026 Reseda Bl., Reseda 818.996.2976 FREE BARRIO ENTRANCE Frathouse 8112 Garden Grove 714.373.3728 UNZIPPED Ripples 5101 E. Ocean 562.433.0357. Hot new GoGo Girls. $6 Absolut, $3 Bud Light Bottles, $1 Jello shots & Trish’s Kitchen

HOOKER CASINO Here 696 Robertson 310.360.8455. SEPT 17- From the team behind Stripper Circus - an all new interactive experience. Presented by Paul Nicholls with Woody Woodbeck, hosted by Billy Francesca & Rhea Litre. MONSTER Eleven 8211SM Bl. 310.855.0800. Tigerheat Hotties WeHo Style! Ray Rhodes & Howie T. spin to big Pop Top! www.clubtigerheat.com STAR BAR Velvet Lounge 416 W 4th St Santa Ana, 18+ BOYS THE “ABBEYWOOD” 684 Robertson Blvd. 310.289.8410. Bi-sexy Scene CHERRY POP Ultra Suede 661 N Robertson. Tom Whitman’s Soda Tops! ROCK & ROLL GAY BAR Fubar 7994 SM Bl. 323.791.3041 The Boulet Bro. Jay Krimas serve you Flesh Trade & all w. Dj’s Jasten King & Barbeau spinnin’ RAGE 18-25 8911 SM Bl. 310.652.7055. Younger, fresher, hotter! 18+. Two rooms of dance dolls. Hip hop too. Hot damn! ARENA 6655 SM Bl. 323.462.1291. Gene La Pietra’s Grande! FRICTION MJ’s 2810 Hyperion SL 323.660.1503. By Scandal! 10p-2a REFLEX Ultra Suede 661 N Robertson Bl. Flesh pool every other Saturday after-hours evenstarpresents. com for info MONTHLY at LA Stock Exchange! RASPUTIN 665 N. Robertson Bl. Sean Wagner gets it all O.C. to L.A. CHIC! FLAWLESS VIP 3673 Merrill Av Riverside. Yep mo’ hot drag shows! Hosted by Venus D Lite, featuring Chad Michaels, Raja, Delta Work, Tommi Rose, Jackie Beat, and admirers. Show 11pm. SCREW MJ’s 2810 Hyperion Av. Third Saturday of month for your kink needs. Tattoo Chris’s raunchiest Dick Down. MJsBar.com SPIT Faultline 4216 Melrose 323.969.2530. Third Saturday. DJ Paul V. OLE OLE Club Cobra 10937 Burbank Bl. NoHo. ClubCobraLA.com Latin Pop, Cumbias, COBRA dancers and our fave El Show de Karlotta VIP 18 & OVER 3673 Merrill Ave. 909.784.2370. Hairspray. 3rd.Sat.of month. Packed hot teen scene, drink specials! CHICO 2915 W Beverly Bl. Montebello 323.721.3404. DJ Brett spins hip hop, house, old skool and Latin. $3 Dirty Water Shots! BLENDER Palms 8572 SM Bl. 310.652.6188. DJ Raw Bert Monthly Mayhem HAMBURGER MARYS 740 E Broadway LB 562.436.7900. 1st 2nd “Play Hard” 21+ NO Cover DJ Dancing 4th Sat BEARS STUNNING HM. 8288 SM WH 323.654.3800 hosted by Calpernia Addams Drag and burlesque show CLUB VENUS Executive Suite 3428 E PCH LB 562.597.3884. Ladies! 18+ Oasis 1386 E Foothill Upland 909.920.9590 FULL FRONTAL DISCO Akbar 4356 Sunset S.L monthly Disco Daddy Mario Diaz RIPPLES 5101 E Ocean Bl. LB 562.433.0357 -1st: LaPlaya, GoGo Papis,DJ Felix,$3 Coronas,Dancing -2nd: Bear Bar, Bears, Daddies, Chubs, Admirers, DJ Jon Williams - 3rd & 4th: PUMP Saturdays,DJ RPM, Hot GoGos, Drink Specials, No Cover ALIBI EAST 225 S. San Antonio Av Pomona 909.623.9422. $2 domestic beer, $4 well drinks DJs and Dancing! No Cover. TRANNYSHACK Monthly @ EchoPlex 1154 Glendale Blvd 213.413.8200. Hosted by Heklina & Cody Bayne. SF Meets LA-Drama-Drag Show

SIZE U. Here 696 Robertson HereLounge.com 310.360.8455. 4pm-2am, Happy Hour, Play Wii & Beer Pong “Prepare to get Schooled” by Tom Whitman RELOAD Robertson 665 N. Robertson Blvd. 11-4pm Brunch & Beats too! Woody Woodbeck gets the guys into munchin’ 15.00 All you can Eat Brunch SERVICE Robertson 665 N. Robertson Blvd. Rob Dorman and Justin David pack in the Gay Beef on the Weho Robertson Restaurant space! GoGos! 4pm RELEASE Mickys 8857 S.M. Bl. Afternoons presented by Stefano Rossi. Music by Res. DJ Strange Machine and guests. Relax. Retreat. Release. DECADES Mickys 8857 SM Blvd 310.657.1176 Stefano Rosso 70s 80s 90s! !HOUSE BOI! AT Velvet Lounge 416 W 4th St Santa Ana Electronica Hauz! UNREAL Hamburger Marys WEHO 8288 SM Bl. 323.654.3800. Calpernia Addams, Delilah DeMilo Shoot Out & Drag Stars Galore. 9pm. No Cover POPRAZZI Rage 8911 SM Bl. 310.652.7055. DJ Tony G. Pops it up! snap! BEARBUST Mickys 8857 SM Blvd 310.657.1176. DJ Ryan Jones upstairs! BOOTY BUMP Fubar 7994 SM Blvd 323.654.0396. Dirty Burty & boys. O-BARS MUSICAL MARTINI NIGHT 8279 SM Bl. 323.822.3300. $8 martini better than karaoke. Pianist doing songs by request! CLUB PAPI LA The Factory. This special monthly event party rules! info: www.clubpapi.com Jamie Awad’s Cholos! BEARS IN SPACE Akbar 4356 W Sunset Bl. SL. 2nd Sun. Dancing bears! BUSTED! Motherlode 8944 SM Bl. 310.659.9700. Beer bust. $5 Infinity/$1 glass. DJ Bobby Y and karaoke 11p-2a. ALIBI EAST 225 S San Antonio Av. Pomona, Beer Bust 3-9pm HAMB MARYS WEHO 8288 SM Bl. WH 323.654.3800 Brunchettes Daytime Drag 11am. Sunday NIght Ben Roman Karaoke HAMB MARYS LB 740 E Broadway LB 562.436.7900 Brunchettes Daytime Drag 11am. Sunday Night CLUB SWAG with DJ Ernie Pearl LUCKY SUNDAYS Tia Juana’s 14988 Sand Canyon Av. Irvine www.LuckySundays.com $2 shots, Lucky Star Revue 10-11pm. DJ Zach. 18+ CLUB BOOMBASTIC HM 740 E Broadway L.B. 526.983.7900. Blacktino! DRAG IDOL Oasis 1386 E Foothill Upland 909.920.9590 C.FRENZ 7026 Reseda Bl. Reseda 818.996.2976. Beer Bust Valley 3-8pm. FLAVOR WildCat Lounge 15 W Ortega Santa Barbara. DJ Gavin Roy. Industry and Beach Babes MySpace Robert Mendez & the boys. RIPPLES SUNDAY PLAYGROUND 5101 E Ocean Bl. L.B. 562.433.0357. Trish’s free Mexican BBQ from 6p-9p. $2 Drafts, $3 Iced T’s. Live bands Cynthia Manley Band & Julian Miranda and the Krush. VIP SUNDAYS 3673 Merrill Riverside 909.784.2370. Opens 3pm. Beerbust till 11p, L.I. Tea’s $3.75 and stiff martinis! STRIP PARTIES Midtowne Spa 615 Kohler 213.680.1838. 3pm HOOK-UP 1047 E 2nd St. Pomona 909.620.2844. Beerbust 3p-8pm . $1.00 16oz. tap, no cover www. hook-up.net UNDIES SUNDAYS Crest Bar 5935 Cherry Av. L.B. 562.423.6650. $2.50 wells ‘til 10p. Free. BBQ 4p8p. Hot boys ‘n’ briefs!

2012-05-04.indd 22

5/3/12 11:31 AM


A TIGERHEAT TOP SHADE SHADY BABY DOLL WITH A IT’S BRITNEY BITCH!!!!!

OPPOSITE BOYSROOM HAUTE ATTRACTION GET IN THE BEHEMOTH FRIDAY LONG BEACH ACTION

KITTY TEEN TRANNY MEOW SEEIN’ THRU THE THURSDAY TIGERHEAT AVALON BABE CAGE

THE BOYS IN THE BAND GETTIN INTO THE BEAT TIGERHEAT THURSDAYS BABES

2012-05-04.indd 23

BOYSROOM FRIDAYS IN LONG BEACH GETTING THE BLUE HAIRED GALS INTO THE EXEC.SUITE SCENE

TIGERHEAT’S MAESTRO DVDJ RAY RHODES WITH MUSICO MAISON EMPIRE EXTRAORDINAIRE

5/3/12 11:31 AM


FIRE CROTCH JEWELS KEEPS THAT DEEP DISHY CLEAVAGE OF HERS OPEN WIDE FOR FRIDAYS BOYSROOM BABES!

HOT CHOCOLATE COVERED CHERRY POPS ALWAYS EVERY FACTORY SATURDAY

A RETRO CHERRY POP FACTORY FLASHBACK!!! YEP MICHAEL JACKSON & BROOKE SHIELDS!

Who?

TOM WHITMAN WITH A SUPER CHERRY POP TOPPER KAT GRAHAM SWEETENS UP THE FACTORY!

PUNK ROCK CRAZY GLUE SPOKESWOMAN SEAN DE LEAR CAMEO’S BRYAN RABIN’S DANDY NEW DIAMOND DOG THURSDAYS

2012-05-04.indd 24

RAIN (DOCTORS!!!) PROPRIETORS KEEPIN’ VENTURA BLVD IN STUDIO CITY HAPPY AND REIGNING GAYS!

THREE F I N E FACTORY MICE HOOKIN’ GOOD FOR CHERRY POP TOPS!!!!

5/3/12 11:31 AM


2012-05-04.indd 25

5/3/12 11:32 AM


REIGNING RUPAUL LADY NEEDLES A LOTA SHOTS FROM THE BARBABETENDERS AT CLUB 340 POMONA!

MR. AND MR. HOOKS GOGO GOOD ….SLURP. HERE LOUNGE HOOKER CASINO

ROCK RAUNCH BEARDS, BILLS ALWAYS WIDE OPEN FOR THURS. ROCK&ROLL FAG BAR

EVEN DA BEARS IN THE HOOD, ARE LAPPIN UP SUM WASHBOARD ROCK HARD GOGOS FOR ROCK&ROLL FAG BAR THURSDAYS

2012-05-04.indd 26

HOOKER CASINO SATURDAYS EVEN GIT THE STREET WALKER HOOKER GURLS IN HERE

WHAT’S A ROCK & ROLL FAG BAR WITHOUT A HAUTEEZE FAG HAG IN GYM BAR THURSDAYS

TRANZ MOFO OF COCK & ROLL CHI CHI LARUE KEEPS GYM BAR’S ROCK & ROLL FAG BAR THURSDAYS TOPS ONLY!

5/3/12 11:32 AM


2012-05-04.indd 27

5/3/12 11:32 AM


thewigs

BY BARBIE Q

Hello, my loves! So, I have this issue with clubs and the security sometimes. Working so much in the nightlife, I have come across a trend that is happening. A lot of straight venues are taking our gay dollars and still not giving respect to all those that enter. Also, I have noticed with a lot of clubs (gay & straight) that everything is kosher when we enter the building, but when those lights come up, it’s “get out!” or they are literally pushing them out the door because they want to go home. I go home perplexed because they treat me cool and all, but I see that the people who are spending their hard earned money are being treated badly. What does a queen do with this observation? Well, I tell you this, it is customer service from the time the patron enters the building until they are safely in their cars and/or cabs going home. I understand that we are tired and want to go home, but know this, how a person feels when they come inside should be the same if not better than when they leave. Security, bartenders, door people, promoters, GoGo dancers, wait staff. We are the atmosphere, the life, the smiles, the assurances. We are what makes nightlife thrive. Take pride in what do - it’s amazing! And know that the one person you are rude to because you are tired reflects bad taste in all those involved as well. No pressure. Mind you, I have been tired many a time, but I have never been rude to a person (granted the drunken ones trying to kiss my makeup off don’t count). And patrons, if you are drunk or under the influence, there is that moment of clarity (I know I have seen it with my own eyes) when you know you are overstepping a boundary or two. Let that little voice say to you “girl, stop it or you are gonna have a situation”. And then stagger away and find you way home. I know you can do it. I believe in you. So, let’s come together. People are flocking to Los Angeles for a reason. The air of camaraderie, artists bouncing ideas off each other and actually having them come to fruition. The support and the love is there. All it takes is one person to make it a great night or a horrible one. Take your pick. You know what to do. Nuff said. So what is going on around town? Well with Cinco de Mayo is here and Long Beach Pride is coming to town. We’re going into the summer mode real fast! AIDS Ride/Walk fundraiser is coming in full force. Art galleries are having a bounty of shows, and there are at least two new plays opening and running in the next few weeks. Here is the Hotplate scoop.

LONG BEACH PRIDE EVENTS:

5/18: 5TH ANNUAL PINK PARTY @East Village Art’s Village (1st and Linden - Long Beach) No cover/21+/7-10p.Attendees will flood Downtown Long Beach’s East Village Arts District in a sea of pink as guests are encouraged to dress the part. Host: Jewels Long Beach. There will be a Long Beach Drag Diva contest competing for $500 in cash, prizes, and of course, cocktails. A portion of the proceeds from the Pink Party will benefit the Long Beach Gay & Lesbian Center’s Mentoring Youth Through Empowerment (MYTE) program.

HOT PARTIES:

5/4: CUB SCOUT @Eagle LA (4219 Santa Monica Blvd.) $5/21+/Club Hrs. Brought to you by Critter control. Host: Lady Bear. Sounds by: Victor Rodriguez and Chris Bowen. Host: Joe Faron. 5/5: FULL FRONTAL @Akbar (4356 Sunset Blvd.) $5/21+/Club Hrs. Brought to you by Mario Diaz and Nelstar. Sounds by: Slash Fiction and Dvdn Alt. Door: Jasmine Albuquerque. Best Boy: Davey Silva. Photos by: Rolling Blackouts. Midnight performance by Danny Dolan.

2012-05-04.indd 28

5/19: GINGER @Eagle LA (4219 Santa Monica Blvd.) $5/21+/Club Hrs. Redheads is what this party is all about. And their admirers. Eric Adams and Cody Bayne present. Host: Dusti Cunningham and Ian MacKinnon. Door: Tyler Daly. Sounds by Eric Adams, Cody Bayne and guests. Photos by: Rolling Blackouts. DAZZLER @Fubar (7994 Santa Monica Blvd.) $5/21+/Club Hrs. Sounds by: DJ Jasten King. Tarot Cards: Dingle Apollo. Photos: Matt Chaney. 5/20: BEARS IN SPACE LOT PARTY @Akbar (4356 Sunset Blvd.) No Cover/21+/2p-12:30a. Right in the back lot of Akbar Critter Control bring it to you! Host: Drew Droege as Chloe Sevigny. Sounds by Rich King (Snaxx, NYC), Sparber (Good Times, NYC), Victor Rodriguez (Cub Scout / Nox Illusio, LA) and Chris Bowen (Cub Scout / Brutus, LA). Performances at 6p.

COMMUNITY HOTPLATE:

5/8: MAY DAY: A GROUP READING @The Standard Hollywood (8300 Sunset Blvd.) Free/21+/ Show @7p. Curated by Steven Reigns, the line up includes Michael Serrato, comedy writer, Tony Valenzuela, fiction writer, Cheryl Klein, novelist, and of course Steven Reigns, the May Day curator and poet. 5/10: PFLAG SILVERLAKE MEETING @Metropolitan Community Church (4953 Franklin Ave.) Free/ All Ages/7-9p. If you’re LGBTQ or the parent of a child of any age dealing with issues of sexual orientation and gender identity, you’ll have the opportunity to talk about your experiences, ask questions, and get info. Participants’ identities are completely confidential and you’re invited to come listen if you don’t feel ready to talk.

HOT FILMS AND FILM FESTIVALS:

5/4: THE AWARENESS FILM FESTIVAL @Macha Theatre Films (1107 N. Kings Rd.) Ticket Prices: $11 pre-sale - $14 day of screening/All Ages/810p. Films include: Un Fils (A Son), PRIDE and THE VOICES AGAINST PROP 8 @ 8:15p. The mission of the Awareness Film Festival is bringing awareness and opening eyes to some pressing issues: Ecological, Political, Health/ Well Being and Scientific Progress. We will showcase Documentary & Narrative Features and Short Films.

HOT THEATRE:

5/7: LIBERTY AND JUDGMENT FOR ALL @The Second City (6560 Hollywood Blvd.)$10/21+/Shows @8p. Written and performed by: Yolanda A. Baños, Natalie Combs, Melissa Malan, Bryan Mayer, Tatyana Peshko, Shawn Ryan, Mish’al Samman, Casey Schuckett, Thomas Wade. Directed by Frank Caeti. Musical direction by Michael Pollock. Run Dates: May 7-June 18th 5/11: THE TEDDY TEDDY SHOW @Akbar (4356 Sunset Blvd.) $5 cover/21+/Show @8p. Join Pete Zias as he becomes Teddy Teddy, club kind and legend in his own mind.

HOT DANCE:

5/5: LA UNBOUND @El Portal Theatre (5369 Lankershim Blvd. - Noho) $18/All Ages/Shows

@4p and 8p. Two performances featuring over 100 performers and many different dance styles, including contemporary, jazz, tap, ballet, hip-hop, aerial, and more!

HOT ART:

5/4: OSCAR RODRIGUEZ -TEXTILE WORKS @Hale Arts Space (2443 Main St.-Santa Monica) Free/21+/5-8p. Part of two-person show, including the work of Barbara Kolo. Oscar Rodriguez’s current series explores ways to move from a two-dimensional piece of textile art into a three-dimensional fabric sculpture. 5/5: GREGORIO DAVILA - LOVE IS SEXY @:A Glaneur (4557 Santa Monica Blvd.) Free/21+/7-10p. “Stylistically relevant, the content and themes speak louder than the streets reaching a universal appeal as stand-alone art works.” DJs and a gourmet taco stand. 5/11: JOE NOFUI - ART SHOW @LA Glaneur (4557 Santa Monica Blvd.) Free/21+/7-10p. His solo show with refreshments and tunes to be had.

HOT BENEFITS:

5/5: KINKO DEMAYO: CLOWNF*CKER @825 Alameda $20 donation/21+/8p-3a. Los Angeles Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence present. Special Guests - Los Payasos. Performance by Wendy Ho! Other entertainment includes: The Pie Guy - Pie Throwing, Payasos Dancers, Great Raffle Prizes. VIP Lounge - Erotic attire and “body paint” costumes encouraged!!! Benefits the National AIDS and Cancer Life Emergency Fund and the work of Los Payasos!

RADIO HOTPLATE:

MONDAYS @7p – IMRU on KPFK THURSDAYS @6p - Lina Lecaro on Moheak.com 15TH OF EVERY MONTH @3p - Loveglamor.ComRadio broadcast PLEASE NOTE: EVENTS ARE SUBJECT TO CHANGE OR CAN BE CANCELLED, BE WARNED. THIS IS WHAT I KNOW BEFORE GOING TO PRINT. PLEASE, PLEASE LET ME KNOW HOW YOU WERE TREATED AND HOW THE EVENT WAS. I AM TRYING TO MAKE IT TO ALL EVENTS, BUT CAN’T MAKE IT TO ALL OF THEM. FOR COMPLETE LISTINGS, LINKS TO THE EVENTS and TO KNOW WHERE I AM MAKING AN APPEARANCE NEXT – GO TO MY BLOG LOVES!!

Thank you so much for letting me share just a little of what I know, and if I missed anyone, know that it is NEVER on purpose! Website: MissBarbieQ.com Email: MissBarbieQLA@gmail.com Thanks to all of you! xo baby xo, Miss Barbie-Q

5/3/12 11:32 AM


2012-05-04.indd 29

5/3/12 11:32 AM


Greenwich Es t. 1

Village

1

BY WILL I. HAVETOCHANGEMYNAME

98

themusic

FE CA

& IA

We are about three weeks away from the fabulous Matinee Las Vegas Festival taking place at Share Nightclub, Rumor Pool, Body English, & Rain Nightclub with an awesome lineup of performers. Spinning will be DJ Hector Fonseca, Taito Tikaro, Dan De Leon, Nina Flowers, Joe Gauthreaux, Derek Monteiro, & Nick Ayler. Singing will be Erika Jayne, Warren Nomi, Kimberly Cole, Amannda, and Mike Munich. Purchase your tickets at www.matineevegas.com. It’s all happening May 25-29.

ER ZZ PI

Erika Jayne

Since 1981, West Hollywood’s landmark pizza palace.

$3 OFF

any order of $20 or more with ad.

Delivery 11am to 2am 310 278 2003 • 8937 Santa Monica Blvd. • West Hollywood

Alanis

August 28th marks a long-awaited new album from Alanis Morissette entitled “Havoc & Bright Lights”. She’s also working with the amazing Guy Sigsworth who produced Morissette’s last album, “Flavors Of Entanglement” which was one of my favorites. This is Alanis’s first release outside of Warner Music Group, which Madonna also left for a deal with Live Nation.

Laminine is a form of a natural ‘adaptogen’ helping to create a state of balance and restoring the body to its natural state of homeostasis.

Kerli

This week marked new releases from Norah Jones, Rufus Wainwright, and Santigold. Songs on my playlist that I think are worth listening to are: “Zero Gravity” by Kerli; “I Heart You” by Toni Braxton; “Dance Again” by Jennifer Lopez; “U Make Me Wanna” by Eddie Amador and Kimberly Cole Feat. Garza; “The Rush (Bjorn Bodin Mix)” by Warren Nomi; & “Put Your Graffiti On Me” by Kat Graham. ‘Til next time, Bitches!!!!!

2012-05-04.indd 30

Regular use of Laminine helps to: • Reduce signs of aging • Builds collagen for healthier looking skin • Stimulate natural DHEA to reduce physical and mental stress • Increase physical, mental & emotional strength • Reduce physical and mental stress • Promote more restful sleep • Produce quicker recovery after work out and increased muscle tone • Elevating serotonin levels to raise your mood • Down-regulate pain receptors in the body • Increase alertness • Improve stamina and energy • Increase libido • Aid in brain function and activity including focus

WHAT CAN LAMININE DO FOR YOU?

Brian McCarthy • LifePharm Global Network Associate • 323.314.8132 www.whyiwanttotrylaminine.com • http://www.purefreedomteam. com/i/lamininelifeforce

5/3/12 11:32 AM


2012-05-04.indd 31

5/3/12 11:32 AM


horoscopes

BY MRS. HELLO

Okay, hello. Happy birthday, Illuminati! Just remember, when you light a birthday candle on this or any other day, you might just be reenacting a minor ritual of illumination. Now isn’t that just the icing on the cake? Such fuss, or as someone once said, “Much ado about nothing.” Well, being illuminated is never nothing, nor is enlightenment anything to sneeze about unless, of course, you have a bout with hay fever. Anyway, strive to know, not just pretend that you do know. When asked after that very same question whether she did in fact “know”, Diane Sawyer was informed in quite certain terms that yes she in fact did “know”. “She”, of course, was none other than Miss Whitney Houston, if you’d like to “know.” In these troubled and trying times, it is more important than ever to get your act together, get good at one or two things, if not more, and proceed with determination and certainty. For gosh sakes, “Know”. I say bully, and not just to all the Taurus’s out there, but to everybody who takes it by the horns and shakes it loose together using any and all assistance available, not in a bad way but more in a mutual effort to rise up and out of this oppressed society and enter a world of enlightenment and knowledge. Oh my stars. Read. Talk to each other. Talk with strangers, despite what your Mother told you. Pitch your projects, in three minutes or less. K-n-o-w what you are talking about. Learn a new word or two, and use astrological guidance to be one of your “personal assistants” on this journey. My favorite model and a true model for life, Carmen Dell’Orefice, who at 80 years old, still works the catwalk and appears in print, says, “Now, more than ever, I’m ready for this photo shoot called life!” Read your horoscope. Kiss someone. Smile for the camera. After all, you’re all stars.

to recall that you are not just one thing or another, but rather a collection of your experiences including good, bad, fun, happy, sad. They make up a bigger picture. In the midst of all this, look for a sounding board and make sure it is someone you can really trust… you’ll see. BLAKE SKJELLERUP/MORRISSEY CANCER JUN 22–JUL 22: Shazzam! Now you’re this; now you’re that; then a dog, now a cat… Like some of your fellow stars, there seems to be a slight identity crisis going on over at your house - which is exactly where you need to start your season of redefinition. Trust me, nobody else is going to blink an eye, but you should. Chances are a “real” you will bring calm, relief, and joy. Accept no substitutes. EDDIE X/SIMON REX

of style. You are something of a slave to fashion/trends, and the like, but really…a fad has a short shelf life. The fundamentals of a good foundation can make the difference between a disaster waiting to happen, and a sure thing that’s made to last and be here when others are only faint memories. Apply this builder’s tip to your life, and see what a developer you can be. RU PAUL/GERARD BUTLER SAGITTARIUS NOV 23--DEC 21: Seems like driving downhill without breaks these days. Some of those in whom you have placed much faith have not lived up to their promises, but you may have to stick with them for the time being, as time is at a premium for you right now. The horizon brings very different people with it. This will be refreshing, but be cautious as the curves remain slippery when wet. Buckle up, for goodness sake. NICK STAHL/KIEFER SUTHERLAND



ARIES MAR 21–APR 19: They climb a mountain because it’s there, but also because they can. In so doing, they “conquer” personal blocks and reveal potential and rewards only imagined before. We all have our mountains to climb. This quarter, some challenges, if met, will uncover much for the formation of your next level. These waters need not be uncharted, because as you know, sometimes at first we don’t succeed, so try, try again. Try one for me! MIKE MANNING/HAYDEN CHRISTIANSEN

TAURUS APR 20–MAY 21: From soup to nuts, that’s you when it comes to being holistic. You definitely represent all aspects. However, lately you have had less soup and considerably more nuts. There is nothing wrong with expanding your circle, but let the current carnival roll up and vanish into the night. Truth be told, you will never miss them. The light and easy you experienced with some people is a good style to remember. Maybe try to do so over the next few weeks and you should find a new spring in your step. LANCE BASS/GEORGE CLOONEY GEMINI MAY 22–JUN 21: There is sometimes a moment when you come to an abrupt halt, and as if given a new vantage point from which to view, we suddenly “get it.” This is soon to be happening for you. It won’t hurt

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If you desire the advantage of knowing how and when to make the best moves you can in your life, Mrs. Hello would love to assist you with personalized Astrological guidance. The cost is nominal, the benefit great, and your confidence assured. Address interest in these services, as well as any other astrologically inclined correspondence to: helloworldproductions@gmail.com and be sure to include “Mrs. Hello” in the subject line.

LEO JUL 23-AUG 23: It would seem that being the ever-capable captain of your ship is producing some smooth sailing these days. It is a good sign and your expanding the playing field has benefited you as well as those that have aligned with you. It is now time to turn some attention to matters of a more personal nature. You are behind in this column, but you are really the only one who knows that, so look for those who have something to give as well as something to get this time. Let family help keep you grounded. JEFFREY KALINSKY/ANTONIO BANDERAS VIRGO AUG 24–SEP 22: Focus is on celebration and achievement over the next few weeks - everything from milestones to small personal victories, but it is all important because you played a part – not only in your own, but in others’ as well. The planning side of you continues to be effective, but a nagging notion to let loose and enjoy will attempt to take center stage. You can be sure that a little of both just may satisfy. So this time, you don’t have to pick and choose. KRISTY MCNICHOL/TYLER PERRY

LIBRA SEP 23–OCT 23: A busy and full spring is sure to usher in an active summer, so why not take a little time to organize things on the home front, and pay attention to other mundane things like record keeping and other boring, but necessary concerns. The good news is that once these are attended to, you will again be free to indulge, maybe even travel, this time free of bothersome burden. A significant individual from the past makes a cameo appearance, with a message. CLIVE BARKER/MARIO LOPEZ

SCORPIO OCT 24--NOV 22: Everything old is new again…well, maybe not everything. More importantly, some things never go out

CAPRICORN DEC 22--JAN 20: You are delivering your usual excellent results, yet the moon just past has swayed your steadfast nature, and you are exhibiting a vulnerability not often displayed. The key here is being okay with it, and letting others help you work through things. Realizing you can possess actual human qualities is the beginning of giving yourself a break. Oh, and as for your work, etc.? You will remain on top of your game. but you knew that, didn’t you? TOM WHITMAN/RYAN SEACREST

AQUARIUS JAN 21--FEB 18: You are feeling a bit like the middle man in a tug of war. You want to step in and address certain situations with more than usual. Your new trend is to be more conscientious and empathetic, something relatively new on your agenda. Some aspects holding you back from fully taking on that role are desire to re-focus on work, and to clean up some unfinished business from the last couple of years. Go slow; this is all good direction. Just keep an eye on balance. You are favored this round. ELLEN DEGENERES/TAYLOR LAUTNER

PISCES FEB 19–MAR 20: You have become something of a walking contradiction. One side is clipping coupons while the other is ordering room service at a swanky hotel. There is never anything wrong with mixing it up. After all, variety is said to be the spice of life. But unless you want to live in a parallel universe of your own making, some decisions need to be made. This sort of existence is exciting, but it takes a lot of effort to keep up, much less the mixed messages you send to those in your eclectic sphere. TIZIANO FERRO/ROB KARDASHIAN

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Save the date: Memorial Day weekend 2012 Welcome to the

27th Annual AALA Roundup WE ARE NOT SAINTS A 12 step AA and Al-Anon Recovery Convention for the LGBT Community and Friends Memorial Day Weekend May 25–28, 2012 Burbank Marriott Convention Center featuring: workshops, musicals, raffles, speaker meetings, banquets, drag shows, surprise entertainment, super-cool dances, and nonstop fun for more information and updates: www.AALAroundup.org The AALA Roundup is the premier AA and Al-Anon convention for the Southern California LGBT community.

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SIN CITY BOYS MATINÉE LAS VEGAS FESTIVAL promises to be the biggest dance festival of the summer.

BY DEREK GRIMES

Coming off sold-out events at Miami’s Winter Party Festival and their Matinée New Years bash in New York, Jake Resnicow and Patrick Crough are joining forces with West Hollywood party producer Paul Nicholls for their next production, MATINÉE LAS VEGAS FESTIVAL. Taking place Memorial Day Weekend, Friday, May 25th thru Monday, May 28th, MATINÉE LAS VEGAS FESTIVAL promises to be the biggest dance festival of the summer with eight amazing parties over four days and nights, including main events and after-hour parties at the city’s hottest clubs, as well as pool parties at the weekend’s host hotel, Rumor. Each party will feature original themes designed to take revelers on an extravagant weekend-long journey. The DJ line-up includes some of the world’s most innovative icons in dance music, including Billboard #1 remixers/producers Hector Fonseca, Taito Tikaro, Joe Gauthreaux, Alyson Calagna, DJ Theresa, Brazil’s Rodolfo Bravat, and red-hot rising stars Nina Flowers, Justin Dawson, Billy Lace, and more. Resnicow hints the Sunday Night Main Event at The Palms Hotel “will be the party everyone talks about for months.” Featuring their trademark BOOM!! brand, the team will take over the legendary Rain Nightclub with Spanish dancers, blazing pyrotechnics and live acts and shows by Cirque Du Soleil. Weekend passes start at $99. The exclusive and luxurious Rumor Hotel (455 East Harmon Avenue, Las Vegas) is the host hotel for MATINÉE LAS VEGAS FESTIVAL. Suites start at $129/night. Rumor will also provide guests with complimentary shuttle service to all weekend events. For more information, visit www.matineevegas.com

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theporn

BY SCOTTY B

The porn world is slowly gearing up for Summer 2012 and I for one cannot wait for the pool parties, sex parties, house parties, and award show pre-parties & after parties with my favorite porn stars. Last week West Hollywood kick-off the porn star season with the Cocktails With The stars yearly anniversary party. DJ & director Chi Chi LaRue spun every fucking song that no one has ever heard of (okay she did play a few Madonna songs) but that b*tch played some kick-ass music. Some of the porn stars that showed up were LaRue discovery Eric Riot, Dean Monroe, Bo Dean, lex sabre, Zane *from AustinZane.com*, Troy Collins, scottie Brooks, Trenton Ducati, Riley Price, Jayden Grey, porn c olumnist Jason sechrest, Rex Roddick, Nick Young, Kieron Jason sechrest Chi Chi LaRue Ryan, Kamrun, soldout Clothing, and probably a few more that just I cannot remember because I’m still drunk writing this. If I forgot your name, I’m sorry... I owe you a blow job!! In less than a month every gay porn star in THE WORLD will descend on Chicago for The Grabby’s hosted by Chi Chi LaRue, Honey West, Adam Killian, Tom Wolfe & Austin Andrews (from the website AustinZane.com) I will once again host the most popular red carpet for NickYoungXXX.com. If you plan on going to Chicago Memorial Day weekend for The Grabby’s or IML then get your tickets now @ www.grabbys.com or www.imrl.com. Courtesy of my second favorite porn site www.gayporntimes. com, writer and creator of the site, JC Adams reminded us that the 6th Annual Blatino Erotica Awards will be handed out this Saturday in Palm Springs. Sponsored by GRINDR, tickets are available at http://clubrimshot.com/blatinoeroticaawards.html giving you access to hangout with the legendary 2012 Blatino Oasis Erotica Award Lifetime Achievement recepient RANDY COCHRAN plus one of the biggest Blatino porn stars of all time: Thugzilla who will be given the 2012 Blatino Oasis Erotica Award Outstanding Achievement. Other stars expected to attend are: sexcyone, Phat Daddy, Trap Boyy, Carlito, Python and many, many more! In other news, Lucas Entertainment keeps on pumping out successful movie after successful movie. If you thought no one was buying DVD’s anymore well don’t tell that news to Michael Lucas because he’s not listening and not stopping. Last month we saw the release of The Last Day starring Jonathan Agassi, Issac Jones, Will Helm, Rafael Carreras, Adriano Carrasco and my all-time favorite Damien Crosse. Curious? Watch the trailer here: youtu.be/_cex9Evy-4U “This movie is to die for…literally,” says star Jonathan Agassi. “This was the best experience I’ve had filming a movie. From my first day on the Ibiza set where I was fucking with hot boyfriends Will Helm and Kriss Aston on the edge of a beautiful fort to battling to stay alive with the powerful Damien Crosse tying me up to drown in the freezing water. I am very proud of the outcome and I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.” Lucas was kind enough to send me some behind the scenes photos and if you want to see some of those coveted photos and possibly win yourself a copy of the new movie The Last Day then email me: scottybpresents@ gmail.com and I’ll put your name into a special drawing and I will giveaway my copy at the end of May! Damien Crosse

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LA 5.4.12