Taranaki/Manawatu Farming Lifestyles August 2012
A dog’s tail…
Makin’ hey ina winter Well, gidday there. Me, Billy the very relaxed Borda Colly back in tuch this week. Lifes pritty relaxt here ona farm rite now. Sharlene and Mum bin feedin’ me so much I gotta bitta wait on too. An’ Mum’s bin givin’ me a good brushin’ too, ‘cos she rickins my coat looks good flowin’ ina wind. Sigh. Not lika Boss wen ‘es home. Lucky if I gits a wee pat ona back if I stops a lamb breakin’ outa tha dockin’ pen eh? But no wurries just now eh, cos a Boss is off over in Yourup an’ thass why Mum’s ‘ere wiv me an’ Sharlene, ta keep us kompiny. Mine you, she and Sharlene bin havin’ a cool time as wellas me, cos they crackin’ a few ofa Boss’s wine kollection most evenin’s when they wotchin Koro street. Thass afta I git me own dinna cooked seperate by Mum. Had bluddy big plate of beef briskit las’ nite an’ plinty left fer tonite too. Acherly, I’m gonna havta wotch it eh? Sharlene had emmill froma Boss tha otha nite. He wuz ina place corled Devin, in Inglind, wots next to another place corled Kornwill, where he reckins they make rippa pies corled pastees, an’ he tole Sharline he’s bin eatin’ pastees and drinkin’somethin’ corled Ginniss ina pubs, an’ was stackin’ ona few pouns as well. Thin he tole Sharlene that hell be rite cosa Dog — he neva corls me by me proper name of Billy eh? — would be reel fit afta lookin’ afta tha farm for ‘im an’ wood soon run tha weight off goin’ roun’ tha proppity.
Yea rite. I’m gonna keep an eye ona kalendar cos’ ifa Boss gits ‘ome an’ sees I’m eatin’ like a king an’ sleepin’ ona couch ‘sted of me kinnil, there’ll be hell ta pay. I’ll jus’ havta do a few runs uppa back fince line an’ try an kerb me feedin’ habits a bit befor he gits back. Jeez it’s a hard life eh? But fora nixt few weeks enyway I’m gonna take Mum’s advice eh? Shes’a rill kool lady an’ she sid ter me an Sharlene wot we gunna ‘make hey wila sun shines.’ Win she firs sed this, I shot ova ta they gear shed, but no wun had dun anythin’ about gettin’ out tha tracta mowa. Thin I figgad that why wood we be makin’ hey ina winter? So Mum thin explayned wot it means is ya kick up ya heels win ya kin get away wiv it. Soun’s fear enuff ta me. But thin I reckin I kin soon sheda few pouns wiv a run or three up that back, an’ winna Boss comes home I’ll make shure I’m standin at attinshin in fronta me kinnil eh? But I’m not shore If I wanta be in Mum ‘n Sharlene’s shoos, wina Boss count’s up ‘is wine kollecshin. Thin agin, wina Boss gits a bit stroppy, Sharlene juss calls him DEAH ina loud voice. An mum juss yells CHARLES!!! ana Boss slinks off ta tha woolshed fora beer. Nah, we’ll be rite eh? Ina meantime, lets get on wiva haymakin’. Cheers. Billy
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Proposed Changes to the Emissions Trading Scheme New Zealand has an international obligation to reduce greenhouse emissions to 1990 levels for the period 2008 to 2012. That period has now been extended to 2013 to 2017/2020 The Emissions Trading Scheme imposes domestic obligations on forest owners and emitters to offset the Government’s international obligations. The United Nations have provided that, from 2013, forest owners may convert forest land to a different land use, provided that the forest owner plants a new forest elsewhere, without having to account for deforestation liability (known as “offsetting”). The Government will allow forest owners to “offset” with respect to pre1990 forests and is in the process of public consultation on offsetting and other Emissions Trading Scheme changes. No bill has been drafted yet but it is likely offsetting legislation will mirror the Government’s international obligations. On that basis “offsetting”, unless there is “gold in them hills”, is unlikely to be of any significant benefit to ordinary forest owners because: • The new forest must be of an equivalent area as the harvested forest; • The new forest must reach the equivalent carbon stock as the harvested forest at the time of harvest; • If either of those requirements are not met there will be a liability to the forest owner for harvesting; • A forest owner would therefore likely need to convert land from
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Taranaki/Manawatu Farming Lifestyles, August 2012