The Campus Toilets Review One of my goals in this semester, besides completing my essays, is to use and review all the toilets on campus. So far, I’m shocked at the state of some of the toilets. The main concern is ventilation, or the lack of it followed by cleanliness of the amenities. The toilets need proper ventilation. It freaking reeks. Also, can we please get better quality toilet paper? I can’t pull enough toilet paper to wipe because the damn thing keeps breaking. It is too god damn thin. If your hand is wet, you are screwed. Hand dryers- I was surprised to see that the new dyson airblade was in operation at the law block toilets. Why is this not standard in everywhere? These things are godly. 10 seconds for complete dry hands. Also another thing to mention, the law block also has a massive heater in their toilets. I feel we are left out. The bureaucratic law staffs know how to pull the strings in their favour and as a result they get the best. I pay my student loans and expect better quality toilet paper. I recently found the holy grail in toilets. I use the staff toilets which are way cleaner and use proper toilet paper and brand name antiseptic soap. DEMAND BETTER TOILET AMMENITIES!!! DEMAND JUSTICE!!!! Yours truly number 2
To the constant complainers, whiners and just plain lazy people who complain about Nexus every damn week. Get off your lazy ass. If you don’t like something – do something about it (with the emphasis on the verb there). If you don’t like what we write in Nexus, then come on down to the Student Union Building and write something yourself. Trust me – you are never going to win that $20 UniMart voucher slagging off about the magazine who is giving away the prize. You try balancing university work, a job, friends and family as well as a deadline every week. You try to write something fresh and different which is also interesting, though-provoking, relevant and witty – and you will be joining the keyboard-bashing-head-slamming club I’m in every week. “But Nexus was so amazing in first year” I hear you whine! Well that was highly likely due to the fact you were too hungover, buzzing off a V, or simply more interested in who was in the drunk and disorderly pages at the back to pay attention to your 9am lecture. Be the change you wish to see in the world. Not the whiney-ass douche that everyone thinks should stfu already. Yours sincerely, Angry Nexus Writer
Dear Sir(s), I think I am right to take umbrage at what I consider your readers’ very offensive takes on me and my views, views which I hasten to point out are not of my own making but based in an eternal document of truth. I don’t suppose anyone will deny the well-established truth that the Bible has more likelihood of being accurate than any other historical document. Ask an historian, and by that I mean a real one, not the bleedingheart PC brigade that dominate loony-left institutions like this one. Fuhrermore, the Bible is very clear on just about everything important (as you would expect from God’s instructional word). So of course I can claim to speak on behalf of actual Christians. Many people who don’t believe in hell still find it unpleasant when they get there. The only thing that can be done for the unsaved is convert them. And converting them is clearly unaligned with handing over our fiscally valuable possessions; we should be pulling the strings not them. We know shares would go to foreigners, and there is no reason to suppose they are likely to be more Christian than Kiwis, especially if the current New Age, Old-EarthTheorising government finally allows our building of Destiny City. Give God what’s Right, not what’s Left. Keep our assets, feed our children, and keep hypocrites and Moneylenders out of the Temple - by which I mean the Church, the New Israel. Edmund John Ram.
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Nexus wants your Lettuce! Write about anything you like. Your name won’t be attributed to your letter if you choose, and pseudonyms are ﬁne (we still need your real name). Send them through to firstname.lastname@example.org before 5pm on Wednesday for a chance to be included in the next issue. Also, we won’t edit anything you send us, because it’s funnier that way. WE DIDN’T WRITE THIS, AND IT’S THEREFORE NOT OUR FAULT. LOVE, NEXUS.
Nexus Magazine - Student Issues