Nathaly Ortiz creative writing I/ Fall 2013 Ms Smith January 13 2014
Reflection Paper In one semester of learning about writing and reading, I learned many things. I do feel that i have grown as a writer and even a reader. Many of the lessons that have been taught to me through this class will stick in my head when I try to write something. I’d like to believe that I am a better writer now and that i have improved in my work. The main reason I joined this class was because I wanted to write poetry. Poetry has always been something I found interesting to write and fascinating to read. I think that the lessons in the early part of this semester helped me put my work into perspective and really see what was good and what was bad about it. This course I would definitely say has helped me become a better writer for reasons already stated. I may not be able to remember some of the grammar lessons that were taught to me but I think that I will do good in my writing. I have been taught many important lessons by Ms Smith that will help me in future writing projects. Before the only thing I thought I was okay at was poetry and after coaching and class discussion I realized that I could be good at other things too.Poetry has in my opinion always been something that I have found to be interesting and fun to read and write but, I wouldn’t say that it is a strength of mine. As a budding writer I have many weaknesses for example: dialogue, character development, imagery and countless other things. Working on my strengths and weaknesses have been my goal this year as a writer and there are many valuable lessons learned in this class. One that I try hard to do is use all my senses to make the writing even more believable and realistic. I also try to think about the situation I put my characters in and how they would use dialogue to talk to each other.
Partner Poem A Poem About Makenzie A baby girl who was born in Durham but her favorite team is UNC A working girl who has a job at Blue Ribbon Dinner but loves Texas Roadhouse A fun girl who has a dog named Dixie and just one brother A social girl who plays softball, is a senior and happy about it, loves to shop and communicate through social media A normal girl who’s favorite color is pink and likes to watch MTV2’s Girl Code who listens to country music while driving her Scion T.C. A traveling girl who’s never been past Georgia and sometimes escapes to another world when reading her favorite book Kite Runner
Dark Sun Contrasting against the yellow petals small bright and lonely Patches of dark green holding onto the long stems swaying in the breeze Shade on a bright day little ants will take shelter underneath petals
MultiMeaning Poem A Day At Peace Look for me there, as I still am And will always be; here Cast to me and I will come, but First you must come silent and, not make a sound, for I will disappear faster than you remember and slower than ever I guess you could say that patience is a virtue floating on air waiting, and waiting for me
Food The First Bite Sitting on a mound of golden sponginess there it is what i've been waiting for this whole time a smooth swirled top decorated with confetti is my prize for patience
Headline All towers crumble It is night when she comes and steals the life of the innocent She does not want diamonds or pearls That is not why she hides behind a velvet night She comes to be noticed and of course for the blood Pay attention to me she screams with every murder With every terrifyingly gruesome scene she leaves Blinded by the lights of the morning she doesn't leave a sign And then a warrior of the people come to destroy her empire As people feared the worst they didn't want to end up a victim So they stayed inside alone with their fears, alone with their thoughts He left on a sullen afternoon to catch the killer that had the town in fear Nobody knew if he would return, yet he did He prevailed and came with her in captive What a glorious day her reign was over and the town was free
Color Green Life: Surrounding me providing a sense of life everywhere I go it's always on the outside there is nowhere I'd rather be than underneath a willow tree swaying softly in the wind as I breathe in the air, and forget all my worries there's something about the color green that makes me feel so serene While I sit outside I watch as the colors seem to flow oh how wonderful that the light dances and reflects on the green of the trees mesmerized by the color's ever changing shade I sit and watch but it never stays the same as the light fads and slowly turn dark I think “what a wonderful day for a walk in the park”
Fantasy What would your perfect room look like? My fantasy room would have floors made entirely out of the softest fake fur on earth. It would have six walls to look like a hexagon and on each wall there would be a different design. Wall one there would be a half chalkboard and a half dry erase board where I could write songs and draw on. The next wall would have my favorite colors and other things, like my favorite things. There would be space for my favorite movies and paintings by my favorite artists and also songs and poems and lots and lots of books. The third wall will be my fandom wall and it will have every T.V. show and band or artist that I love. There will be posters and computer screens that have chatroom discussions about what I love and it will be perfect. The next wall will have my bed and other comfy things like Egyptian cotton sheets and satin nightgowns. The fifth and sixth walls will have all the books i’ve read and also all the books i’ve ever wanted to read. The walls will also contain all of the music that I could ever listen to. In the room there would be a bed in the fourth wall and the furniture would look kind of vintage and rusted because I love that look. A small kitchen area would be included because I love to cook and I get hungry easily. In the small kitchen there would be a small pantry with a fridge and a stove with a sink. The bathroom will be through the sixth wall and when you enter it will looks as if you stepped into a foreign kings bathroom. Very extravagant and large the tub will be large and have claws on the bottom and i will have a separate shower. There will be a fine painting on each wall, the closet it located on the other side of the bathroom. This closet will be like a small store and the design will be very modern. I love clothes and shoes mostly, on the left side will hold all of my clothes and the right side will hold all of my shoes and in the middle I will keep my accessories and perfumes and socks. Everything will look nice and neat in my room.
Wandering Aimlessly Nathaly Ortiz My darling, we have seen everything but the end is coming soon wandering aimlessly as we go and I will try one day very hard to catch the light in your eyes and share it with the world what more can we look for when the world has nothing more so lets just rest our eyes for a while and a day and you'll play your guitar as the angels sing in our hearts we start to sing along running wild under the stars taunting thoughts, to never grow old we’ll be like peter and wendy in neverland and we never slow down what more can we look for when the world has nothing more so lets just rest our eyes for a while and a day and you'll play your guitar as the angels sing in our hearts we start to sing along
“Tommy died three days ago in the crash, I'm so sorry the doctors couldn't do anything for him. They tried everything.” My mother looked at me with tear streaked cheeks, and I looked around at the green walls of the hospital bedroom. I couldn't grasp what she had just said, Tommy is gone? My amazing little brother that helped me through so much is gone. A nurse came into the room and stood by the bed while she checked my heart monitor, it had started to decline with my hearing of the news. The lights are starting to fade again and I can't focus on a thing. I think the nurse has slipped me something while I wasn't looking, but all I can do now is think as I succumb to the darkness. The next few days I have to stay in the hospital. I do nothing but sleep even though the doctors said I was previously in a coma for three days. Sleep is all I want to do. They think that I'm unresponsive and might never open up about this, but I just don't have anything to say I feel sadness and disbelief. Was it really just last week when everything was fine? I had the perfect life and the perfect family we lived in the nicest house in the nicest neighborhood and went to the nicest school. This is all a dream, I think for the tenth time today. Of course it is how can it not be? Over the period of the next day I am told that I can leave soon, My mother looks at me as if I am crystal and can easily be shattered by any other news about my brothers death. I just ignore her and fall asleep again, In my dream there is a car and a flash then I hear Tommy saying something but I can't see him, I can't move from where I am. I feel something nudge me and then I hear him “Get up sister, you have to get up it's not your time yet I'll see you soon don't worry.” I don't understand him “Tommy! Where are you? Can you hear me? Come back I can't do this without you.” I can move my head and I try to look around but I can see that the dream is slowly fading away now. Don't fight it sis, is the last thing I hear before I am awakened by the sun shining through a window that I instantly recognize as my window in my house. I sit up confused by my dream and decide to venture downstairs. I see my mother at the kitchen table drinking her coffee and watching the news, she doesn't see me yet and I watch her actions. I am reminded of the dream as I take a step forward. My mothers head snaps to me,“Well look who's up! How did you sleep?” There was something in her voice that made me think twice about answering her, she said it like she wasn't expecting an answer. I wonder how long it's been since I've talked to her I can't remember really and I suddenly feel guilty. She's already lost a child and now she's losing another one. “Where's Dad?” I didn't recognize the voice that escaped my mouth, it sounded too small and hoarse. Different. My mother looked up at me surprised but answered my question cautiously. “At your brother's funeral, I wanted to stay here and look after you. I wouldn't be able to handle going to my baby's funeral.” Her voice cracked slightly as she tried to look strong. I rushed over to her and caught her in an embrace muttering “I'm so sorry Mom, it's all my fault I was supposed to be watching him and I couldn't even do that. I'm a terrible sister.” I kept apologizing until I could think of nothing else to say and just held my mother as she cried over my brother. It was noon when my father came home to
find my mother and I on the couch asleep but he didn't wake us, he just sat and slept with us, there was nothing else to do. That was last week and I still have the same dream every night I don't understand what my brother means by “Don't fight it Sis.” I have to go to school tomorrow; I can already feel the weight of my backpack as teachers give me all the work that I've missed while I was out. But mostly I can feel the stares of the people around me trying not to seem obvious that there looking at the sister of the kid that just died. From my bed, which I have grown into over the last week, I can hear my parents talking loudly over something “...Alex hasn't talked to me since that night. I'm worried I don't know if she can handle going back to school tomorrow.” My mother said clearly trying to whisper but failing miserably. “The psychiatrist told us that getting into our previous routine will help with her coping with …” He fell silent I could tell he was thinking about Tommy. “I can't even cope with this John! My baby is gone there is no way that I can feel normal about this.” I could hear her walking away to the point where I couldn't hear them anymore. I didn’t know what to do so I just ignored everything I felt and went back to sleep. The next morning was hard “Wake up, Alex, I see your eyes you're not asleep.” My mother barged in my room and started to pull the covers back off of my face. She got really close to my face and I could see her puffy eyes. “I know you don't want to go but it will ease your mind and help you cope “I don't want to cope I want to remember Tommy!” The same unfamiliar feeling came as the words flew out of my mouth and shocked my mother. “Just be ready when I come back.” She left me and went downstairs. I dragged myself out of bed and looked through my closet, I chose some sweatpants and a baggy sweatshirt, there was no reason to look pretty today. “Have a nice day at school, sweetie.” I heard my mom say before I slammed the door and proceeded to the front of my school. I get inside of the school with not much fuss because I am late, but just then I stop because I can't believe what I'm looking at. I see my brother Tommy standing right in front of the office starring at me. “Tommy? Is that you, please come home we miss you.” I pleaded with the apparition. “It's okay sis, I miss you too but you can't come before your time. Don't worry though it'll be soon.” Tommy disappeared then. “Come back I don't understand! What do you mean?!” I ran after Tommy's ghost but there was nothing there. I looked around nobody saw it happen or me for that matter so I got out of there. I ran out more likely I felt like I couldn't get out of there fast enough my brother was haunting me, I had to get home. Out of breath twenty minutes later I get home and open my front door. The first thing I see is my dad on the��couch crying I think he's saying something. I get closer “Dad? What's wrong” He didn't answer me he just kept repeating “not again” over and over again. I couldn't get a response from him so I went upstairs into my room and sat on my bed, “ARGGGG. I DON'T UNDERSTAND ANYTHING.” I screamed into the air. Nobody would hear me anyways. I decide to turn the TV on because I don't want to think anymore. “...Breaking news in the triangle area today. There has been an accident near Rockdale High road, there has been two confirmed casualties. Names have been withheld until further notice. There will be more details tonight at 8...” I turned the TV off. It's just what I need right now to hear about more deaths. Just then it occurred to me that my mother wasn't home yet, she should have been home before me. I start to panic but then I remember she told me she would try to go shopping because we were running out of food. I ease myself back on the bed because I had found myself standing up with worry. I laid down and tried to sleep, withing a few minutes I was under.
The dream started off the same as the others, with Tommy saying that I shouldn't fight “it” then it changed. My mother was there too and she told me to come closer, and I could suddenly move freely and I could see what was crushing me. It was life, everything that I've ever experienced was crushing me and I could finally break free. I'm free I think as I walk towards my mother and my little brother, They didn't look sad anymore and I think I finally understand.
Scary Short Stories
"No please, don't hurt me. I've got nothing to give you." Albert stood and watched the small girl in her most vulnerable state. He viciously rattled the cage that the girl was sleeping in and caused her to awake with eyes the size of tennis balls. Still groggy with sleep her speech was slurred, "Whatever I did I'm sorry just please, spare me. I don't want to die in here." She pleaded with her captor but he didn't budge or blink. Shivering in her small tunic that had many holes in it she waited silently for something to happen. Albert crouched low and got close to her face, which was wet with tears. "I have a date" he said calmly, then stood and started for the door. Before he left he turned off all of the lights and slammed the door. The small girls whimper was all he heard as he locked the door. "Lock all your doors tonight people we've still got a killer on the loose, down at the station we're calling him Hannibal, after Hannibal Lecter because guess what? He eats his victims! This guy is insane" Albert cut off the radio and shuddered slightly. Ten minutes later he pulled into The Guillotine, a trendy five star restaurant with an ironic name. After the valet pulled off with Albert's midnight black Mercedes he walked inside and was greeted by the large Gothic style ceilings and marble floors. People were everywhere chatting and drinking wine, unaware of the world outside. Then he saw her, a curvaceous woman wearing a crimson stained ballgown. She had long cascading hair, black like that of Snow White's. She was looking around the room, and when she spotted him she started to walk over. Albert composed himself and got ready for her arrival. Before she even reached him she was talking “Hello there, are you Mr. Fish?” She called in a high voice. “And you must be Mary.” There was a hint of a chuckle in his voice as if he had heard a joke. “Come, let's go find out where we are sitting.” He took her arm and found the waiter. A young waiter lead them to a brightly lit table with blood red table cloth in the corner of the room. “Hehello sir, ma'am this is your table for the night is there any problems?” “No, this is perfect.” Albert thanked the waiter and he and Mary sat in the chairs. “You know I’ve never tried online dating until my best friend thought my many cats were ruining my dating life, she made me the profile and I never thought anybody would want to meet me. In real life at least.” With a suspicious gleam in his eye Albert said “Well I’m not disappointed in the least, you seem very delectable to me.” “Aw, thanks man, that’s one of the nicest things anyone has ever said to me.” “Well, it’s true I could just eat you up.” Just then the waiter walked over to the tables with the two glasses of water. “Are you ready to order sir?” “I think just water will be fine for now, thank you.” “Oh, no I think I’ll have red wine, please,” Mary interrupted. But just then Albert shot her a look of pure menace. “Maybe for now water is fine, wine can come later.” He spat. Mary made a childish face at him but said nothing else. “Ok then, I’ll be back to take your orders when you are ready.” The waiter then turned to leave. “I have to go to the ladies room.” Mary decided as she
got up from her chair. While she was walking she thought about leaving because of his sudden outburst. Albert just waved her off. When Mary was out of sight Albert takes out a small vial from his coat pocket and empties the contents into her water. When Mary comes back Albert immediately apologizes “I’m sorry I snapped at you, Mary, but it’s just that I’m a recovering alcoholic.” Mary’s face softened slightly as she sat down. After minutes of awkward silence Albert called the waiter over to take their orders. “I’ll take a steak but make it rare, please.” The waiter and Mary looked at him funny. “Rare, sir?” “Yes. And what will you have, Mary?” Albert questioned. “Just a salad. Thank you.” Mary took a sip of her water, within minutes of taking in the poison she was bilious and a pale shade of green. “I don’t feel so good just then all of the contents from her stomach reappeared on the marble floors. Everybody was looking and some waiters were starting to rush over. “Would you like me to take you home?” asked Albert in a kind voice. “Yes please. I’m feeling very terrible right now.” Mary did not notice that during the ride he did not follow the directions she gave him to her house and instead took her to his. Albert grabbed her out of the passenger's seat and went towards the door. As Albert carried Mary, they both wobbled up the stairs that lead to Albert's large house “Man, you must be loaded, this house is crazy beautiful. Look you even have those things from the movies.” Mary's speech was slurred with sickness as she described the house to him. “Yes, those were here first of course and those things are gargoyles dreaded objects really they take away from the beauty of the house. “Oh, my stomach hurts so bad I wonder what was in the food at the restaurant.” Mary looked at Albert and her eyes suddenly got larger “I could sue them!” She said this like it was one of the best ideas of the century. Albert dropped her on the couch as soon as they reached the inside and said in a menacing tone. “Mary, I've drugged you, I am now going to conduct an experiment, I am going to feed you something and you will tell me in detail what the taste is like. Okay, shall we?” He disappeared down a dimly lit hallway as Mary tried to regain composure, “You're not serious, right? I mean I feel pretty sick already I think food would just make it worse don’t you think? Besides I thought you were dropping me off at my house.” She called after him. A few minutes passed and Mary started to get anxious she observed the house surrounding her. The first thing she spotted was a skull sitting atop of an elaborate stone fireplace. It looked so real that you could believe it was a human skull. Mary got up from the couch to get a closer look, but something else caught her eye it was blood. There was one tiny spot of blood on the otherwise spotless floor but the drugs that were slipped to her took full effect and only seconds later she was sprawled out on the floor momentarily unconscious. Albert stood in front of the cage that held the small girl. “What do you want from me?” She pleaded, but again there was no answer. Albert opened the cage and held out his hand. The girl shriveled away from his touch. “Come on child, you want to leave this horrid, place right?” She took his hand and he led her to the living room where on the floor all you could see was crimson red fabric and the head of Mary. A shriek escaped the lips of the young girl “Who is that? What are you going to do with me?” “Oh dear child, I am going to feast tonight! I’ve finally gotten the perfect combination of meat. Young and old, small and large it’s perfect I’ll be eating for days.” The girl shrunk away from Albert suddenly the room felt too cold and dry. The last thing the small girl saw was Mary wake
up only to have a knife pushed into her sternum and fall back down again. The last thing the girl heard was her own neck cracking between the twisting of Albert’s hands. “What a perfect feast.”
Dead Celebrities Amy Winehouse and Queen Cleopatra (written in the perspective of a teenaged Cleopatra) Before The Throne
June 10 Today sucked. I really wish that I could have gone out with my friend Amy. My dad says she’s not the kind of person I should be hanging around but he said that about Julius and were doing just fine. I can see why my father would say that Amy is a bad influence, she has tattoos and her boyfriend does drugs with her. But we are alike in so many ways for example we both love makeup. We share tips all the time mainly about eyeliner. June 14 Things have gotten worse with the Amy situation. I was going to show my dad that she isn’t bad at all but when she came over to my house yesterday and threw up all over my dining room floor, My dad was not impressed. He even asked if she was on drugs, she denied and said it was lack of sleep or something she had eaten before. I tried to help her but she called her boyfriend, Blake, and left; I haven’t heard from her since. I called her mom and told her what happened, she’s going to send Amy away to get help. I hope Amy doesn’t hate me. July 1 Amy is in rehab and she doesn’t hate me i found out. I visited her and she told me so herself, she also said that she wishes that she could leave. I told her she needs to get better soon so we can talk about makeup again, I don’t think she listens to me anymore. July 10 Julius wants me to move with him, he wants to be famous one day. I found out i’m pregnant so moving seems like a smart choice. I’m going to miss my best friend Amy, she wont notice i’m gone. She’s just waiting to leave that place so she can get back together with Blake. I wish her the best. I hope Marc and I leave soon, I don’t want my father to know that i’m pregnant. August 20 Tomorrow were moving and i can’t hide my stupid gut anymore. Amy won’t talk to me anymore and everything is a mess. Julius says that it will all solve itself when we leave but I don’t know if I believe him. I’m leaving this journal behind along with the memories i’ve made. To leave room for many new memories in a new place. Maybe i could even rule over everything, a crazy thought but Julius says were going to the top. I hope he’s right.
Personal Experience My Time In Seventh Grade It was a very bright day, almost as if the sun decided to shine a little brighter because it was finally summer. The last day of school was always a day for mixed emotions. While in the cafeteria a couple of friends were talking about their dire situation. “Ugh! Today is going to suck, all the 8th graders are going to leave and we get stuck with a whole bunch of snotnosed 6th graders.” Jason ranted, “I wish we could leave with them but, i’m not ready for high school.” He continued even when his friends had stopped listening. “I mean” Melonie interrupted him by clearing her throat. “Jason shutup, were about to go play on the soccer field.” Jason’s eyes rolled to express his disinterest. The teacher was calling to them. “Lets go children, since it’s so nice out today we’ve decided that were going to stay outside until lunch.” “Yes, maybe now we can say goodbye to the older kids.” Jason called out to Melonie, but she was already out of the cafeteria doors. He caught up to her outside, “Hey you left me, as i was saying we could find some of the older kids and say goodbye, aren’t you friends with that one there.” He was pointing to a small girl that stood beside the fence that lead to the soccer field. “No. I’m not friends with any 8th graders, and neither are you, so why are you making such a big deal out of them leaving?” Melonie asked in a quiet voice.
Letter to your grandchild Dear little darling, I really hope when this letter finds you, you are well and happy. I hope you are listening to your mother and father. You have great parents who love you very much. Grandpa and I are looking forward to visiting you a while this summer. You always seem to be so much fun there. I see much of myself in you. When I was young, I would always play tricks and mess around like you seem to enjoy doing. I find that whenever anyone has a true passion for what they are doing, they will be successful at it. If your true passion is sports, then you should follow your passion. I forget who told me this along my lifetime but always remember “Life without passion is unforgivable.” But don't get too caught up on the little things. Everything has a purpose in your life. I've heard that the greatest purpose in life is to help others or get involved in something bigger than yourself give back to your community or something like that. Grandchild, no matter what you will always be family and if you ever need to talk about anything i'm always here. Nathaly
Extra Credit Observation Poem
Sounds Of a School Look up and you see gray the walls are gray and if not gray it is brown there is no excitement here it is a school, after all the outside is quiet and, the smell of nature enters my nose the hum of an unknown machine and birds give off a shrill chirp everything here is green and brown
Autumn Light frosty air falls on beautiful red leaves surrounding the dark grounds