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Magazine Your complete guide to all the best satellite TV EDITION 95 14th

YOUR VERY OWN

- 20th July 2011

FREE FUN AND

INTERESTING WEEKLY MAGAZINE! AY

Fast Golfer URSD TH found himself with A young man who was also an avid RYgolfer E V E hours to spare one afternoon. REE He figured if he hurried and playe in 9 holes before he had to head home. fast, he could get F Just as he was about to tee off an old gentleman shuffled onto t and asked if he could accompany the young man as he was g alone. Not being able to say no, he allowed the old gent to join him. To his surprise the old man played fairly quickly. He didn't hit th far, but plodded along consistently and didn't waste much time

PUZZLE GAMES • PICTURES • MAPS • JOKES • TV GUIDE • TRUE STORIES

Finally, they reached the 9th fairway and the young man found h with a tough shot. There was a large pine tree right in front of h - and directly between his ball and the green.

After several minutes of debating how to hit the shot the old finally said, "You know, when I was your age I'd hit the ball righ that tree."

With that challenge placed before him, the youngster swung ha the ball up, right smack into the top of the tree trunk and it th back on the ground not a foot from where it had originally lay.

* Let The Magic In

The old man offered one more comment, "Of course, when I wa age that pine tree was only 3 feet tall."

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23rd July SATURDAY


Magazine CONTENTS Including: Ÿ Suduko Ÿ Number Cruncher Ÿ Logic Quiz Ÿ Recipe - Quick Fish Pie Ÿ The blonde joke to end all blonde jokes! Ÿ A boating accident - OUCH!! Ÿ Carvoeiro house for sale - great value!! Ÿ Canil in Loulé - your help is needed, even in the smallest way

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PORTUGUESE BANK HOLIDAYS 2011 April 22nd Good Friday April 24th Easter Sunday April 25th Freedom Day May 1st Labour Day June 10th Portugal Day June 23rd Corpus Christi August 15th Assumption October 5th Republic Day November 1st All Saints' Day December 1st Restoration of Independence Day December 8th Immaculate Conception December 25th Christmas Day Additional MUNICIPAL Holidays (treated as Bank Holidays in the area) fall on the following dates: Viana do Alentejo 13 January Vila do Bispo 22 January Ferreira do Alentejo 5 March Vila Real 13 May Loulé 13 May São Brás 1 June Olhão 16 June Castro Marim 24 June Tavira 24 June Albufeira 20 August Silves 3 September Faro 7 September Lagoa 8 September Lagos 27 October Portimão 11 December

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Baptista - Praia da Luz, Lagos The Owl Story - Lagos Algarve Book Cellar - Carvoeiro Carvoeiro Golf Shop - Carvoeiro Algarve Quiroprática - Pêra Let the Magic In - Algoz The Laundrette - Vale Parra Simple Taste - Albufeira Bookworms - Albufeira Villas do Campo - Vilamoura Sam Brazence - São Brás de Alportel Pão e Pão - São Brás de Alportel Quick - São Brás de Alportel

Contact details: editor@mytvalgarve.com: for general items classifieds@mytvalgarve.com: with your ads carina@mytvalgarve.com: to discuss advertising campaigns and publicity or distribution 282 574 506 or 962 125 596

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Magazine

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Magazine * Let The Magic In

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We recently found yet another abandoned dog in Paderne. She was in a lane in a corner under a tree and looked as if she had just had puppies. Had a collar on but no address and did not appear to be chipped. She was outside a house, the owner of which, a Portuguese lady said she had already been there for 2 weeks, but she had given her some water!!! She was painfully thin. We went home and got some dog meat, and biscuits and water and proceeded to feed her for 11 days, all the time hoping we would find her owner or that she would go home. As we were shortly going back to UK for a week, we decided we had to find a Canil for her. I spent a whole morning, all the money on my mobile phone and only on the 10th phonecall to the above Canil did Mrs. Lilo Kranandonc (not sure about the spelling) READILY agree to take her, if we could get her there, although they ALREADY HAVE 240 dogs, numerous cats, donkeys and horses, We went to Loule, and found the Canil and borrowed a large dog box, went home and the next day picked up the dog and what a brilliant dog, went in the box, wagged her tail every time we stopped to check she was OK, and went on a lead when we got there. She is not a pretty dog and had we not got already 3 dogs and a cat of our own, we would have had her. That Canil is doing a simply marvellous job, relying on donations. They need also old clean towels and blankets, food, leads and collars, dog beds and anything pertaining to animals and of course MONEY. Its an ideal place if someone is looking to adopt a dog and give it a good home and life. I just wondered if you could please do a article on the Canil and ask if anyone is prepared to give anything? They would be very appreciative for anything. IF YOU HAVE ANY OLD TOWELS, BLANKETS etc or wish to donate some food, please take to Let the Magic In, Algoz and they will ensure it all passed to the Canil.

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Magazine

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Puzzles 1-4 Sudoku #2 - Easy

Sudoku #1 - Easy

8 1

3 5 8

7 6 3

7 6 5 5 9 4 3 2 4 8 9 2 6 5 2 1 6 8 9 2 4 3 5 8 1 2 7 7 5 6 Sudoku #3 - Intermediate

8 9 2 7 1

9 5 6

5 1

3 9 8 6

5 4 7 9

1 2 3 9 3 8 3 1 4 5 9 6 2 9 1 7 3 6 7 8 3 4 1 2 7 5 6 8 4 9 1 1 7 4 2 9 Sudoku #4 - Intermediate

5 1 6 4

7 3

1 3 5 7

8 6 2

1 1 4 8

3 7 2 9 1 8 7 3 4 1 2 7 3 1 2 6 3 2 8 6 8 1

On this day‌.21st July 1403 Battle of Shrewsbury: King Henry IV of England defeats rebels to the north of the county town of Shropshire, England 1904 Camille Jenatzy sets world auto speed record at 65.79 MPH

1976 The first outbreak of "Legionnaire's Disease" kills 29 2005 Four terrorist bombings, occurring exactly two weeks after the similar July 7 bombings, target London's public transportation system. All four bombs fail to detonate and all four suspected suicide bombers escaped, but were later arrested.


Puzzles 5-8 Sudoku #6 - Challenging

Sudoku #5 - Challenging

6 2

2 9 3 2 7 6 9 8 1 2 3 5 8 2 1 5 3 3 7 9 6 7 5 4

9 2 5

2 3 9 3 6 1 2 5 8 4 1 7 9 1 4 6 4 8 5 3 9 8 1 7 4

9 2 3 7

3

3

2 9

1

7

6 3

6 5

4 7 6 8

2 1 7

Sudoku #8 - Super Tough

Sudoku #7 - Tough

6 5 4 1

6

3 2 1 7

1 9

9 8 2 7 6 5

8 5 6 7

6 8 7 4

6

On this day‌.23rd July 1880 The first commercial hydroelectric power planet begins, Grand Rapids, Mich 1958 The first 4 women named to peerage in House of Lords 1968 PLO's first hijacking of an El Al plane 1982 The International Whaling Commission decides to end commercial whaling by 1985-86. 1986 In London, Prince Andrew, Duke of York marries Sarah Ferguson at Westminster Abbey. 1997 Digital Equipment Company files antitrust charges against chipmaker Intel.

1


Hints Sudoku #2 - Easy

Sudoku #1 - Easy 40 35

18 41

42

9

25 36

13

12

15

23 33

5

6

32

7

8

34 24

32 33 39 27

8

13

41

16

2

27 28 44 29 12 13 30 31 14

21 49 34 16 50 35

25 17

29 34

42 43

18

41 30

6 1

46 24 47 48 26 28

8

36 37

49 19

50

5

40

53 51

20

12

10

1

21

22 11 38

3

36 29

3 5

51 7

23 52

14 47 7

Sudoku #5 - Challenging 43 52 44

45 53 46 32

20 21

22 23

24

26 27

6

20 17

7

12 16

25 1

10

8

13 11

2

9

50 39 49

22 23 38

39 30 19

Sudoku #7 - Tough

13 40

26 19 27

28 29 14

31

31

8

27

4

1

33 34

47

5

57 48 37 38 49

9

51 10 23

35 36

2

3

15 18 10 19

7

6

4

44 45

31 32 16

12

34 33

52

36 35

37 51

42

22 50 52 11

21

1 7

5

46

32

3

22

15

53 24 16 17 54 12 13

2

41 10 39 9

35 34

8

14

13

16 54 55 56 17 18

12

6

25

11 52 20 53 42 43

20

39 21 3

8

Sudoku #8 - Super Tough 24

46

19

17 14

53 38

40 41 25 42 18 43 44

45 32

33

25 41 43

47 30

3

28 29 21

7

10 25

2

28 11 29

14 27 15 37

56 30

9

48

33 34 35 26 36 18

55

9

Sudoku #6 - Challenging 1

5

46

20

39 12 48 15 40 17

41 42 31

4

30

11

40 24 51

54 55 47 48 49 50

8

27 28 18 37

38 26 32

4

4

44 45

22 24 31

13

2 9

7

Sudoku #4 - Intermediate

31

6

43 21 22 23 24

11

14

35

5

9

52 15 43

44 42 45

3 17

25 10 26

Sudoku #3 - Intermediate 23

41

6

4

17 21 30 22 31

4

42 18 19 20

3 16

20 29

2

1

2

14

38 39 40

27 28

11

19

35

1

36 37 15 16

43 37

26 38 39 10

45 32 33 34

19 44 45 15

48 23 57 49 33 36 50 6

47 30

51

29 26

4

28

5

46 38

37

40


Answers Sudoku #1 - Easy 8 9 6 3 5 4 7 1 2 1 7 5 8 2 9 4 6 3 2 4 3 1 7 6 5 8 9 6 5 9 7 4 8 3 2 1 4 3 8 9 1 2 6 7 5 7 2 1 5 6 3 8 9 4 9 6 2 4 3 7 1 5 8 5 8 4 6 9 1 2 3 7 3 1 7 2 8 5 9 4 6

Sudoku #2 - Easy 6 4 9 7 8 1 5 2 7 6 9 3 8 3 1 4 5 2 2 9 4 5 1 7 1 5 3 8 2 6 7 8 6 3 4 9 3 7 5 2 6 8 9 6 8 1 7 4 4 1 2 9 3 5

Sudoku #3 - Intermediate 3 8 2 6 4 1 5 9 7 7 6 4 9 2 5 1 8 3 9 5 1 7 3 8 6 4 2 6 2 7 8 1 3 4 5 9 4 1 5 2 9 7 3 6 8 8 9 3 4 5 6 7 2 1 2 7 9 1 6 4 8 3 5 5 4 8 3 7 9 2 1 6 1 3 6 5 8 2 9 7 4

Sudoku #4 - Intermediate 5 8 7 2 9 3 6 4 1 3 6 2 7 1 4 9 5 8 9 4 1 5 8 6 2 3 7 2 3 9 1 4 7 5 8 6 7 5 8 6 3 9 1 2 4 6 1 4 8 5 2 7 9 3 1 2 3 9 6 8 4 7 5 4 7 5 3 2 1 8 6 9 8 9 6 4 7 5 3 1 2

Sudoku #5 - Challenging 1 8 5 6 7 3 4 2 4 9 7 2 8 1 6 5 2 6 3 5 4 9 8 7 5 7 6 3 9 8 1 4 3 1 9 4 6 2 7 8 8 4 2 1 5 7 3 9 6 3 4 8 2 5 9 1 9 2 8 7 1 6 5 3 7 5 1 9 3 4 2 6

Sudoku #6 - Challenging 4 6 8 3 2 1 7 5 7 5 2 9 4 8 6 1 1 9 3 7 5 6 8 2 6 1 7 4 8 2 9 3 8 2 4 5 3 9 1 6 9 3 5 1 6 7 2 4 3 7 1 6 9 5 4 8 5 8 6 2 7 4 3 9 2 4 9 8 1 3 5 7

Sudoku #7 - Tough 3 5 8 6 4 7 1 1 7 4 9 2 8 6 9 6 2 1 3 5 8 5 4 3 2 6 1 7 2 1 7 8 9 4 5 8 9 6 7 5 3 4 4 2 1 3 8 6 9 7 3 5 4 1 9 2 6 8 9 5 7 2 3

9

9 3

1 2 5

6 7

4 8

2

5 3 4 7 8 9 3 6 2

1

5 6 8 1 4 7

5 3 1 8 4 9 6 7 8 3 6 7 4 9 5 1 2 2

4

9

1

3 2 5 6 7 8

9 3

4 5 7

8 2 1 6

Sudoku #8 - Super Tough 1 4 6 3 8 2 5 7 9 3 5 2 6 9 7 1 4 8 8 7 9 5 4 1 3 2 6 4 6 1 7 3 9 8 5 2 9 8 3 2 1 5 4 6 7 5 2 7 8 6 4 9 3 1 6 1 4 9 2 3 7 8 5 2 3 5 1 7 8 6 9 4 7 9 8 4 5 6 2 1 3


Question: What is the truest definition of Globalization? Answer: Princess Diana's death. Question: How come? Answer : An English princess with an Egyptian boyfriend crashes in a French tunnel, riding in a German car with a Dutch engine, driven by a Belgian who was supposedly drunk on Scottish whisky, (check the bottle before you query the spelling!!), followed closely by Italian Paparazzi, on Japanese motorcycles, treated by an American doctor, using Brazilian medicines. This is sent to you by a Canadian, using American Bill Gates' technology, and printed by a computer that uses Taiwanese chips, and a Korean monitor, assembled by Bangladeshi workers in a Singapore plant, transported by Indian truck drivers, hijacked by Indonesians, unloaded by Sicilian longshoremen, and trucked to you by Mexican illegals..... That, my friend, is Globalization !

One way to stay sane: sit in a parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars and see if they slow down.

WORD SEARCH - DINING ROOM

THE COMPUTER SWALLOWED GRANDMA The computer swallowed grandma. Yes, honestly its true! She pressed 'control' and 'enter' And disappeared from view. It devoured her completely, The thought just makes me squirm. She must have caught a virus Or been eaten by a worm. I've searched through the recycle bin And files of every kind; I've even used the Internet, But nothing did I find. In desperation, I asked Google My searches to refine. The reply from him was negative, Not a thing was found 'online.' So, if inside your 'Inbox,' My Grandma you should see, Please 'Copy,''Scan' and 'Paste' her And send her back to me. This is a tribute to all the Grandmas who have been fearless and learned to use the Computer........ They are the greatest!!! We do not stop playing because we grow old; we grow old because we stop playing. NEVER Be The First To Get Old!

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1

On which main river is Bristol, England situated?

2

In golf, what term means a score of one stroke under par for the hole?

3

What does a sphygmomanometer measure?

4

In Greek mythology, what is the name of the creature having the head, trunk and arms of a man, and the legs of a horse?

5

Java, Columbian and Kenyan are types of what?

6

What is the name of the sugar that occurs naturally in honey and many sweet fruits?

7

Of what field of science was Gregor Mendel the founder?

8

In which town is Postman Pat set?

9

The phrase 'Book 'em, Danno' was associated with which TV show?

QUIZ 1

10 What is unusual about the beak of the New Zealand wrybill? 11 Who wrote Three Men In a Boat? 12 To which Roman general are the words 'Veni, vidi, vici', 'I came, I saw, I conquered', attributed? 13 What is the term for the process by which a chrysalis changes into a butterfly or a tadpole changes into a frog? 14 What gas forms about 78 percent of the Earth’s atmosphere? 15 When we want something 'quid pro quo', do we want something for nothing? 16 What was the full name of the character played by Ronnie Barker in the TV programme Porridge? 17 In which English town is the traditional Goose Fair held, taking place on the first Thursday, Friday and Saturday in October? 18 Who had hits in the 1960s with 'Don't Sleep in the Subway', 'Downtown', and 'The Other Man's Grass'? 19 Who starred as 'Dr Dolittle' in the original film of the same name? 20. How many 'Von Trapp' children were there in the film The Sound of Music? 21 What does the Kelvin scale measure? 22 Which mammal has the longest pregnancy (20 months)? 23 What is the largest type of owl? 24 What is the connection between the singers Dionne Warwick and Whitney Houston? 25 Celia Johnson starred with which actor in the film Brief Encounter? 26 Which has more bones in its neck, a giraffe or a mouse? 27 In musical terms, a 'humoresque' is a playful or humorous composition. True or false? ' 28 Why Can't This Be Love?' was a number eight hit for whom in 1986? 29 Who wrote the musical Blood Brothers? 30 What were formerly known as RÜntgen rays, after their discoverer?


I was sat in a restaurant and got hit on the back of the head by a prawn cocktail. I looked round and this bloke shouts, 'That's just for starters!'

MANAGEMENT LESSONS Lesson 1:

A priest offered a Nun a lift. I got sacked last night from the Salvation Army soup kitchen, ungrateful so-and-so’s. All I said was, 'Hurry up, some of us have got homes to go to!'

In an Indian restaurant last night having a meal, waiter came over and says, 'Curry ok?' I said, 'Go on then, just one song then get lost'

"Quotes On Technology" "The information superhighway is a dirt road that won't be paved over until 2025." -- Sumner Redstone, CEO of Viacom/ Blockbuster. "Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?" --H.M. Warner, Warner Brothers, 1927

"This telephone has too many shortcomings to be seriously considered as a means of communication. The device is inherently of no value to us." -- An internal Western Union memo, 1876

She got in and crossed her legs, forcing her gown to reveal a leg. The priest nearly had an accident. After controlling the car, he stealthily slid his hand up her leg. The nun said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?' The priest removed his hand But, changing gears, he let his hand slide up her leg again. The nun once again said, 'Father, remember Psalm 129?' The priest apologized 'Sorry sister but the flesh is weak.' Arriving at the convent, the nun sighed heavily and went on her way. On his arrival at the church, the priest rushed to look up Psalm 129. It said, 'Go forth and seek, further up, you will find glory.' Moral of the story: If you are not well informed in your job, you might miss a great opportunity.

TAKE TIME TO THINK ABOUT THESE.

"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers." -- IBM chairman Thomas Watson, 1943

To write with a broken pencil is pointless.

"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home." -- Ken Olson, founder, chairman & president of DEC, 1977

A thief who stole a calendar got twelve months.

"640k ought to be enough for anybody." -Bill Gates, 1981 (Did he mean $640K?) "Computers in the future may weigh no more than 1.5 tons." --Popular Mechanics, forecasting the relentless march of science, 1949

When fish are in schools they sometimes take debate.

When the smog lifts in Los Angeles , U.C.L.A. The professor discovered that her theory of earthquakes was on shaky ground. Dead batteries were given out free of charge. A dentist and a manicurist married. They fought tooth and nail.


TAKE TIME TO THINK ABOUT THESE. MANAGEMENT LESSONS Lesson 2: A sales rep, an administration clerk, and the manager are walking to lunch when they find an antique oil lamp. They rub it and a Genie comes out. The Genie says, 'I'll give each of you just one wish.' 'Me first! Me first!' says the admin clerk. 'I want to be in the Bahamas, driving a speedboat, without a care in the world.' Puff! She's gone. 'Me next! Me next!' says the sales rep. 'I want to be in Hawaii, relaxing on the beach with my personal masseuse, an endless supply of Pina Coladas and the love of my life.' Puff! He's gone. 'OK, you're up,' the Genie says to the manager. The manager says, 'I want those two back in the office after lunch.'

Moral of the story: Always let your boss have the first say.

A will is a dead giveaway. If you don't pay your exorcist you can get repossessed. With her marriage, she got a new name and a dress. Show me a piano falling down a mineshaft and I'll show you A-flat miner. You are stuck with your debt if you can't budge it. Local Area Network in Australia : The LAN down under. A boiled egg is hard to beat. When you've seen one shopping centre you've seen a mall. Police were called to a day care where a threeyear-old was resisting a rest. Did you hear about the fellow whose whole left side was cut off? He's all right now. If you take a laptop computer for a run you could jog your memory. A bicycle can't stand alone; it is two tired. In a democracy it's your vote that counts; in feudalism, it's your Count that votes.

Lesson 3

An eagle was sitting on a tree resting, doing nothing. A small rabbit saw the eagle and asked him, 'Can I also sit like you and do nothing?' The eagle answered: 'Sure, why not.' So, the rabbit sat on the ground below the eagle and rested. All of a sudden, a fox appeared, jumped on the rabbit and ate it. Moral of the story: To be sitting and doing nothing, you must be sitting very, very high up.

When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds The guy who fell onto an upholstery machine was fully recovered. He had a photographic memory which was never developed. Those who get too big for their britches will be exposed in the end. When she saw her first strands of gray hair, she thought she'd dye. Acupuncture: a jab well done.


ANAGRAM CROSSWORD

MANAGEMENT LESSONS Lesson 4

A little bird was flying south for the winter. It was so cold the bird froze and fell to the ground into a large field. While he was lying there, a cow came by and dropped some dung on him. As the frozen bird lay there in the pile of cow dung, he began to realize how warm he was. The dung was actually thawing him out! He lay there all warm and happy, and soon began to sing for joy. Across 1 ACTORS 4 BIASED 9 ARCS 10 LACERATION 11 AILING 12 RAPPAREE 13 Mischance 15 NETS 16 CUSP 17 Relatives 21 Marocain 22 Remote 24 EXCITATION 25 Bard 26 Hissed 27 DANCES

Down 1 OCEANIC 2 GRIPS 3 CAUTION 5 BANTAM 6 DEPOSITOR 7 RASCALS 8 CEPHALOMETRIC 14 PATHOGENS 16 ECHIDNA 18 Impress 19 Paroled 20 COILED 23 Bleat

A passing cat heard the bird singing and came to investigate. Following the sound, the cat discovered the bird under the pile of cow dung, and promptly dug him out and ate him.

Morals of the story: (1) Not everyone who doo-doos on you is your enemy. (2) Not everyone who gets you out of the doo-doos is your friend. (3) And when you're in deep doo-doos, it's best to keep your mouth shut!

On this day‌.25th July 1603 James VI of Scotland is crowned first king of Great Britain. 1837 The first commercial use of an electric telegraph was successfully demonstrated by William Cooke and Charles Wheatstone on 25 July 1837 between Euston and Camden Town in London. 1871 Carrousel patented by Wilhelm Schneider, Davenport, Iowa 1946 At Club 500 in Atlantic City, New Jersey, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis stage their first show as a comedy team. 1985 Spokeswoman for Rock Hudson confirmed he had AIDS


QUIZ 2 1. The film title of which 2002 Hollywood horror thriller takes its name from a series of water colour paintings by William Blake? 2. The name for which sport stems from the French words meaning 'hooked sticks'? 3. Which musician, who has sold 72 million albums world wide, including five number one singles, is the 'A' in "A&M Records"? 4. Other than nationality, what connection do Homer Simpson, Mary Blige and Elmer Fudd have? 5. Which Belfast shipyard built the RMS Titanic? 6. War films in the 60s and 70s often had an all star cast. With the aid of the following actors who appeared in the movie, name the war film. One point for each correct answer. a. Curd Jurgens, Laurence Olivier, Michael Caine, Kenneth More, Edward Fox and Robert Shaw b. Maximilian Schell, Laurence Olivier, Michael Caine, Edward Fox, Sean Connery and James Caan c. Curd Jurgens, Kenneth More, Sean Connery, Richard Todd and Henry Fonda 7. Outside of the USA, F, B, H, and 2H are some examples of what? 8. 'Defenestration' is the act of doing what? a: Showing the existence or truth by giving proof or evidence b: Throwing someone or something out of the window c: To treat as non-existent d: To hate or loathe intensely 9. Between the years 1960 and 1989 there were three number one UK hits with one of the four seasons in the song title. Can you name them? One point for each correct answer. 10. Which two football clubs did Edison Arantes do Nascimento play for in his career? One point for each correct answer. 11. In September 1759, the British, under the command of General James Wolfe, and the French, led by the Marquis de Montcalm, met in a decisive battle that would determine which colonial power would rule North America. Which two names were given to this battle? One point for each correct answer. 12. Before Prohibition was introduced in 1920, Missouri was second only to California in US wine production. Only one Missouri winery survived during the Prohibition due to a provision in the 18th amendment. What did they sell? 13. Which famous military leader apparently said one June evening after a monumental battle, "Next to a battle lost, the greatest misery is a battle gained."? 14. William of Ockham was an English Franciscan and a philosopher. What was the name of his cutting edge 14th century principle? 15. Based on metric tonnes per year, which four countries do we thank for producing the most hops? One point for each correct answer. 16. "Flemish Bond" and "English Bond" are two methods of doing what? 17. Which Pulitzer prize winning novel, later a film with the same name, uses quotes and illustrations from 'The Ashley Book of Knots' at the beginning of each chapter? 18. Capt. Quint meets a nasty end in which film? 19. Which Lord, whose name is an article of clothing, led the Charge of the Light Brigade "into the jaws of death"? 20. Which US station and research centre, named after a Scottish Royal Navy officer, is the largest community in the Antarctic?


ANSWERS QUIZ 1

ANSWERS QUIZ 2

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15

1. Red Dragon (William Blake's series of paintings were titled 'The Great Red Dragon')

16 17 18 19 20 21 22 23 24 25 26 27 28 29 30

Avon. Birdie. Blood pressure. Centaur. Coffee. Fructose. Genetics. Greendale. Hawaii Five O. It curves sideways. Jerome K. Jerome. Julius Caesar. Metamorphosis. Nitrogen. No, we want something for something, an equal value exchange. Norman Stanley Fletcher Nottingham. Petula Clark. Rex Harrison. Seven. Temperature. The Asian elephant. The eagle owl. They are cousins. Trevor Howard. Trick Question: They both have seven. True. Van Halen. Willy Russell. X-rays.

ANAGRAM CROSSWORD SOLUTION

2. Lacrosse (jeu de la crosse, 'game of the hooked sticks') 3. Herb Alpert 4. The middle initial 'J' 5. Harland and Wolff 6. Three answers a. Battle of Britain b. A Bridge Too Far c. The Longest Day 7. Pencils (classification and grading of pencils) 8. b: Throwing someone (or something) out of the window (a: is demonstration, c: is abrogation and d: is abomination) 9. Three answers. Summer Holiday (Cliff Richard & The Shadows), In the Summertime (Mungo Jerry) and Summer Nights (John Travolta & Olivia Newton John) 10. Two answers. Santos and New York Cosmos (Edison Arantes do Nascimento is better known as 'Pele') 11. Two answers. The Battle of Quebec and The Battle of the Plains of Abraham 12. Sacramental wine (the St. Stanislaus Novitiate winery run by Jesuits) 13. The Duke of Wellington (after the Battle of Waterloo) 14. Ockham's Razor 15. Four answers. In order; Germany, USA, China and the Czech Rep. 16. Bricklaying 17. The Shipping News 18. Jaws 19. Lord Cardigan 20. McMurdo


Magazine

Only in Canada would you see a sign like this!

Read the whole sign. ‌. Fort Steele is near Cranbrook (I have blocked out an obvious word, so as not to offend anyone!)

because you’re sp ecial

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E-mail:

Beautiful range of hand-made greeting cards. Want to send someone a very special keepsake? candy .handmane And at , ALGOZ

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When was your last eye check ?!?

Magazine

Look carefully at the picture below. Did you see the bare bum of the girl in the background??? If you did see that in the picture? you need to have your eyes checked... as that is the armpit of the girl holding the camera... I’ve made your appointment, it’s is at 2pm tomorrow!

Love the look on the Orangutan's face!!! Proof That Men Have Not Evolved Much!

Posh Spice gives birth to baby weighing 7 lbs 10 oz; baby's weight not disclosed

FORGOTTEN TO SUBMIT YOUR TAX RETURN FOR PERSONAL OR RENTAL INCOME? WE CAN HELP!

Sovereign – Consultoria Lda Parque Empresarial Algarve, Bloco 8, 21, Lagoa +351 282 340 480 port@SovereignGroup.com www.SovereignGroup.com/Portugal 8

Confirmation you have a foot odour problem!!!


Now This Is A Splinter !

Magazine

Read the story on this before you think much about it. *DON'T DRIVE THAT FISHING BOAT TOO FAST! *So you thought YOU had a bad day at the office !

Life is not measured by the number of breaths we takebut by the moments that take our breath away……

This is an actual emergency room photo of a fisherman who lost control of his High Speed Bass Boat in West Virginia The warden's believe that he was travelling at a speed of approximately 75 mph at the time of the accident. He was unable to negotiate a curve in the narrow waterway and unfortunately for him, upon striking the shoreline, he was ejected from the boat and landed on an old fence post. You can probably picture what happened next, but this photograph really says it all. The good news is after about 6 months, this man made a full recovery after suffering a shattered hip, broken leg, several broken ribs, internal injuries and soft tissue damage. The doctors credited his recovery to the fact that the post lodged itself so tightly that there was little or no blood loss!! . Now, that's got to hurt!

Happy Birthday

Happy Birthday From Carrie & Scruffy

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Magazine

Delicious Fish Pie 400g Mixed fish – salmon, cod, plaice, etc. 100g Peeled prawns 450ml Milk 750g Potatoes peeled and chopped 100g Unsalted butter 50g Flour 150g Frozen peas 1 Heaped tablespoon of chopped flat-leaf parsley leaves 3 Hard boiled eggs, chopped (optional) Juice of ½ lemon 50g Grated Mature Cheddar Method 1. Place the fish (except the prawns) in a baking dish and season, add 400ml milk, cover with foil and bake at 325°F for 15 minutes until the fish flakes away slightly when pressed with a fork. 2. Remove the fish, reserving the milk. 3. When it is cool enough to handle, flake the fish into bite-sized pieces – add the prawns. 4. Cook the potatoes in salted boiling water until tender. Drain and keep warm. 5. Melt half the butter in a saucepan, stir in the flour and cook over a low heat for 2-3 minutes. 6. Slowly add the reserved milk. Cook until thickened. 7. Add the fish, peas, parsley, egg, lemon juice, salt and pepper. 8. Mash the potato with the remaining milk and butter, then season. 9. Pile the fish mixture into the baking dish, spoon or pipe the mash on top’. 10. Sprinkle with grated Mature Cheddar and bake at 325°F for 20-25 minutes until golden brown.

“Waggi Tails” HOME FROM HOME THE HOTEL FOR YOUR BEST FRIEND NO CAGES - NO CONCRETE RUNS - NO LONELINESS Private • Peaceful • Safe

Tel. Samantha 926 200 380 / 961 824 225 - Collection 10


Messines 12

Tunes

Alte

17

Silves

Algoz 1

2 3 3

Post office

5

4

pharmacy

Ferreiras

ve r

di n

ho

6

Va l

7

A22

A22

Lagoa Alcantarilha

São Brás de Alportel 18

20

N125

N125

Praia da Luz

8

16

15

Guia

Albufeira

21

Pêra

22

Lagos

9

10 11

19

13

Carvoeiro

Faro Quarteira

Vilamoura

Old Town

15

Just White

1

Restaurante “A Curva”

8

Sovereign

16

Sheila’s Wax service

2

Claudia Babici - manicure

9

Villas do Campo

17

Villa for Long term Let

3

Let The Magic In

10

Carvoeiro Golf shop

18 São Brás de Alportel x3

4

Quinta dos Avós

11

Algarve Book Cellar

19

Bookworms

5

Restaurante “Sobretempero”

12

CW Entertainment Algarve

20

Algarve Quiroprática

6

Fire Wood – Mr. Bitoque

13

Simple Taste

21

Baptista

7

The Magic Threads

14

M2M Blinds - see ad

22

Owl Story

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