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Penis Enlargement Bible


Penis Enlargement Bible

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The eBook is supplied for information purposes only, even though the contributors of this material are well conversed in the subject matter printed. The material content in this ebook does not constitute professional advice. This eBook is designed to provide accurate and authoritative information with regards to the subject matter contained. It is sold on the understanding that the publisher and its contributors are not engaged in rendering legal, accounting, or other professional advice. If professional advice or other professional assistance is required, the services of a competent professional should be sought. The readers are advised to consult with any appropriately qualified professional before taking any decisions. If you have or suspect an illness or have a health concern, always consult with your physician or health care provider. We have used our best judgment in compiling this information, however, the information presented may not have been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. Any reference to a specific product is for your information only and is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Table of Contents Introduction .......................................................................................................................... 4 Know Your Penis ................................................................................................................... 6 Measuring Your Penis ............................................................................................................ 8 Penis Exercises: The Basics................................................................................................... 10 Penis Exercises: Stepping It Up A Gear (Advanced Exercises) ................................................ 16 Penis Exercises: The Schedule .............................................................................................. 20 Conclusion........................................................................................................................... 24

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Introduction

First of all, congratulations on your choice to download this ebook. This ebook may be free, but I can assure you it‟s priceless. Soon you will know exactly how to enlarge your penis! So consider yourself lucky, my friend, because normally you have to pay $49 just to read guides that are less good than this one. This is a real treat indeed. Now let‟s talk about penis. Your penis, to be exact. I„d bet that your woman has not said in your presence that a bigger penis feels much better during sex than a small penis. It‟s no surprise because she doesn't want to hurt your feelings. Copyright © PenisEnlargementBible.com. All rights reserved.

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Penis Enlargement Bible You see, one of the top complaints from women about their sex life is their partner's small penis size. So what can you do now to make sure your penis causes compliments, not complaints? Don‟t worry, I‟m here to help. If you want to know how to enlarge your penis, then doing exercises is one of most popular ways to increase the size of a man's penis. Nonetheless, there is some effort required - and a catch! By doing some penis enlargement exercises, you can train your penis to let more blood into it which will give you a harder erection and assist in penis growth if you follow the other necessary steps to cause big growth. (This is what the exercise "gurus" didn't want you to know!) But of course, exercises alone DON'T work. In the same way that your body does, your penis needs nutrients and biochemicals to repair itself and - more importantly for us - to grow. What's more, you can trick your body into restarting puberty style penis enlargement (i.e. natural growth) with biochemicals that were present in your body during puberty, but which left when it ended! When they left your body, penis growth ground to a sudden halt. A cool video all about biochemicals and their function in penis enlargement can be found at www.PenisEnlargementBible.com. However, right now you can read this amazing free penis exercise ebook and start straight away to improve your sex life. What I can say is that this guide has been changing the way a bucket-load of men think about treating their "size" problem. Within a few minutes, you will learn how to become a much better lover with a bigger penis. Now enjoy this free report and please pass it on to your family and friends. Tell them about PenisEnlargementBible.com. They need your help too. :) Let's get started!

John Collins, PenisEnlargementBible.com

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Know Your Penis

I'm not going to waste this space (and your valuable time) by telling you all about your penis. You know what a penis is already, right?! :) But there is some important stuff that you need to know if you want to make your penis bigger... As you know, the penis is not a muscle. It's also not a bone. Instead, it's made up of delicate spongy tissue which grew because biochemicals in your body made it bigger as you went through puberty. The most important thing you've gotta remember is that the penis isn't a muscle that can be exercised in the conventional way. BUT... You can use exercises to accelerate penis growth. And this free guide is all about those exercises which are most effective at accelerating the growth of your penis.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Unlike muscle, your penis consists of three cylinders or tubes of tissue. These are arranged with two cylinders on top (as you look down on the penis) and one on the bottom. They are each roughly the size and shape of a pencil. Running through the bottom cylinder is the urethra, the tube through which urine and sperm pass. These cylinders of tissue are firmly held together by a wrap of tissue called Buck„s fascia. If you want to make your penis bigger then you have to enlarge these 3 cylinders and the Buck's fascia. Here's a diagram of the male sexual organs:

Our objective is to make the shaft of your penis bigger in length and girth from the base all the way to the tip. When we do that you get a bigger penis. Penis exercises, unlike muscle exercises, are focused on trapping blood in the penis for longer than is natural. When I implemented my method of penis growth, this accelerated results and took me from a lowly 5” to a big 8”. This guide is focused on getting you gains that are between 2 and 4 inches personally. Before we look at the exercises themselves let's talk about measuring your penis...

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Measuring Your Penis

The truth is, the majority of men have no idea how to measure penis length accurately. To accurately measure your penis is vital if you want to record the increases in size. Here are the steps to measure your penis size accurately so you can give yourself an honest measurement about how you jack up to the male average of six inches‌ FIRST.... find a measuring device. A cloth measuring tape works best. IF you can't find one - then a piece of string will do. After measuring yourself with a piece of string you can place that string along a wooden ruler or some other measuring device! (I hope that makes sense)

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Penis Enlargement Bible IF your penis 'curves' or 'bends' [and many penises do!!] be sure to measure along the curve or bend. Don't measure STRAIGHT from your pubic bone to the tip of your penis in other words! Now the fun part... GET ERECT! Take your measuring device and measure your penis from your pubic bone (the 'pubic bone' is the bone you feel when you press in the area that is covered by your pubic hairs). Don't press TOO hard - but hard enough to be firmly against that bone. Now hold your penis - if you have to! - and place the measuring device (whatever it is that your using) along the top of your penis. (That„s the part of your penis that YOU see!) You are measuring from the pubic bone along the TOP of the penis to the tip of your penis. THAT measurement [whether in inches, centimeters or millimeters] is your OFFICIAL length. The reason I suggest measuring FROM the pubic bone is because it puts every guy on a level playing field. It's a way of being more accurate. Some heavier guys have extra fat behind their pubic hairs - making the penis APPEAR smaller. But we're going for the scientific method to measure your actual size. If you are using a piece of string or whatever, find the distance from your pubic bone to the tip of your penis and then measure the piece of string. To measure the thickness or 'girth' or your penis - stay erect and find the thickest part of your penis (along the shaft). Take your measuring device and wrap it around your penis to get your actual girth measurement. Take note of how many inches, centimeters or millimeters it takes to go all the way around. That measurement will be the official girth of your penis. That's it. That's all there is to it. Now, onto the basics of exercises... J

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Penis Exercises: The Basics

Penis exercises are a way of trapping blood in the penis. While some people sell systems on penis exercises this guide is free. And it's free because I'm not going to lie to you about penis exercises. I'm not here to make a quick buck. I was once where you are – trying to get a bigger penis – and I was scammed countless times. Here is what “gurus” who rip you off with exercise programs will tell you: o “Penis exercises are a great way to make your penis bigger. They're all you need to grow by 2-6 inches!!!”

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Penis Enlargement Bible o “Buy my stuff!!!” o “Exercises work because the enlarge the blood vessels in the penis and then your penis can accommodate more blood. That means you get a bigger penis!!!” I gotta tell you right now though. That's total BS! What you need is the two-step biochemical method to penis enlargement. One of these steps is exercises. So here's what you need to know about exercises. This is basic exercises, advanced exercises and finally a schedule for when to do what. Here's what you need to know... Some men, all too eager to see gains, have gone straight in at the deep end and done harm to their penis by not following the routine structure. Please be careful!

Warming up Just like any sports, warming up is very important to make sure that you protect your penis from any undue damage. If you fail to warm up properly then you're really putting a penis risk. I'll say it again, warming up is vital! First of all, you need to prepare your penis. Soak a washcloth in warm or hot water, then squeeze it out. Take the warm cloth and wrap it around the shaft of your penis (either flaccid or erect). Hold it right there for a minute, remove it, repeat at least twice. Next is to dry off your penis well. Many people have come up with different ways of warming up but I find the simplest to be dunking a towel in hot, but not boiling, water and wrapping it around your penis. The hotter the better – but please be careful not to burn yourself. Before you begin your daily exercises, you have to start off with this procedure for at least 5 minutes. The hot compress is useful because it draws blood to the area of your penis, thereby escalating the blood flow and making the skin more elastic. Another advantage is that this also ensures a good grip for the exercises you will be carrying out.

Lubrication Lubrication is necessary for all of the techniques we recommend here. Using the right lubricant will help you avoid irritation to the sensitive skin of your love gear.

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Penis Enlargement Bible There are many types of lubricants are used around the world. Of course, the most popular types are water-based personal lubricants. The water-based lubricants are so simple and easy to clean up, but tend to dry out quicker while you are exercising your penis. Therefore you may need to add more lube as you progress through your workout. While the petroleum-based lubricants are fine to use but they seem to be thicker and harder to clean up. Vaseline is the most popular of the petroleum-based lubricants, but we believe that VigRX oil works the best. This oil has been specially formulated to boost male enhancement. Now you are going to learn is standard stretching and standard Jelqing.

Stretching Standard stretching involves stretching penis so that the ligaments get longer under penis therefore gains length. The purpose of this method is to create tension in the erectile tissues by stretching the skin of the penis while in an erect state. Not only does this make the skin of your penis slightly elastic, it also expands the amount of the space in your penis chambers, the corpora cavernosa. The higher the amount of blood that can fill these spaces results in an enlarging of the overall mass of your penis. Stretching is so simple that you need to do is stretch the penis to make it longer. This involves gripping the penis just below the head and stretching it out with force to the ligaments gain size. There are six stretches. 

Stretch one: While sitting on the edge of a sofa or bed, begin stroking your penis using your thumb and forefinger (the same "a-ok" symbol used in our other methods).

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Penis Enlargement Bible Pulling the penis directly in front of you. You put the penis out directly in front of you from 30 to 40 seconds. As you stroke the penis from the base toward the head, maintain a firm grip and stretch the skin as best as you can. 

Stretch two: you put the penis directly down for 30 to 40 seconds.

Stretch three: people the penis directly up for 30 to 40 seconds.

Stretch four: you pull the penis directly to the left for 30 to 40 seconds.

Stretch five: you pull the penis directly to the right for 30 to 40 seconds.

Stretch six: you rotate the penis all the way in a circular movement for 30 to 40 seconds.

Repeat each direction 2-3 times. With these six stretches all you have to do is four sets of each everyday. Only do this after you have warmed up correctly. After you've finished the exercise you can release the grip on the base of your penis. You should feel the blood begin flowing again. Go ahead, you may ejaculate at this point if you feel the urge. Remember to use a firm grip and enough lubrication, always exercise caution! Do not grip your penis too tight so that you lose the circulation. If you are in pain or feel any discomfort, then you are doing the technique in the wrong way. Read the instructions again and retry the technique slowly.

Jelqing Stretching exercises are useful for lengthening your penis. But in order for one man to increase the circumference, you have to perform stretching exercise while your penis is in a partially-erect state. Jelqing is the technique that develops the whole penis so that its length, thickness, weight, and density all become proportionately enlarged. Jelqing (also called "milking") is actually one of those ancient practices that has been performed for centuries by various tribes and cultures around the world. It's considered the most successful method of enlarging the penis. These “milking” exercises could force the blood into your penis. Over the course of several months, the blood spaces in the penis will gain volume. In other words; they can hold more blood. As a result, your penis gets larger.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Jelqing is slightly different from stretching. Standards Jelqing involves forcing blood through the shaft of the penis by using your hand to trap it so that the blood vessels expand. The standards jelq, the one that you'll be using for the first number of weeks, requires that you make a shape with your thumb and forefinger. To make this easier to explain simply make an okay symbol with your hand. The 'O' that you create through doing this will form the basis of your jelq. The Standards jelq involves gripping the penis at the very base, squeezing tightly, and milking penis as you would a cow so that blood is forced to the tip. Standard jelqs should each last 3 seconds from the base to the tip. 1. Apply your lubricant all over the skin of your penis. Keep your lubricant close by since you will want it to last for as long as you need it. Don‟t use the soap because it tends to dry the skin. 2. With your thumb and forefinger, squeeze the base of the penis shaft. Pull downward. Stop at the head. Repeat, alternating hands. Each stroke should last about three seconds. The stimulation will certainly help you reach an erection. 3. When your penis becomes semi-erect (not fully-erect), make the "A-OK" sign with the thumb and forefinger of your left hand. With this hand, grip tightly around the base of your penis. 4. Now starting from the base, pull the penis gently yet firm. Stretch downward and outward. You have to maintain your semi-erect penis at this point. Make certain to start from the base the head with each stroke. Note that the head of your penis will get bigger with blood. 5. Switch to your right hand and repeat the stroke, starting from the base and stretching downward to the head. Alternate both hands in a smooth rhythmic ("milking") movement, touching upon every part of the penis except the very top part of the penis head. This is the very foundation of jelqing.

Don‟t forget that jelqing exercises are not performed during fully-hard erection. Make sure that your penis is between half to 3/4 erect. Results cannot be obtained until a partial erection is present. After this exercise has been done for quite some time, you will notice that your penis appears both longer and thicker. This is a fact. And we can assure you that from within one to several months of routine exercise, your penis will emerge quite huge; this is due to the impaction of blood in the penile tissues.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Carefully choose ONE of these jelqing exercise techniques that you feel comfortable with to include in your daily routine.

PC Muscle Workout What nearly everyone doesnâ€&#x;t know is that the pubococcygeus muscle (pyoo-bococksee-gee-us) or PC muscle plays a critical role in the functioning of the penis. The pubococcygeus muscle is actually a group of muscles that run from the pubic bone to the tailbone. The PC muscle is the muscle you bring into play to stop the flow of urine from the bladder. It is also the muscle that contracts whenever you ejaculate, moving the semen up through the penis and out of the body. The PC muscle is a busy little muscle, you know? But as far as most men are concerned, it is still grossly unknown. Mastering the techniques of male multiple orgasms is easy once you know how to train your pubococcygeus muscle. When you urinate and you want to get the last drop out, you use your PC muscle in the opposite direction. By doing this you'll feel your anus open and the feeling will be somewhat different. Most men can do Kegels anywhere, since they're seldom aroused by the exercises. Continued over a lifetime, the exercises can help men and women avoid urinary incontinence as they age. That, plus greater arousal, enhanced orgasms and longerlasting sex, make Kegels one of the simplest, most beneficial exercises a man or woman can do throughout their lifetime. Be careful though. Using your PC muscle can have negative effects. If you produce too much testosterone then you will find that you ejaculate prematurely. However if you follow our guidelines you will actually enhance your ejaculation control. The basics of the PC muscle work out involve you clenching your muscle as hard as you can for a certain amount of time. To find the muscle in question all you have to do is stop the flow of urine when you are in the toilet. In the e-mails that we send you we will give you an exact routine every week.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Penis Exercises: Stepping It Up A Gear (Advanced Exercises) These next exercises are more advanced. You will use these as your penis becomes more used to being exercised in this way. They introduce more strain to the penis. If you were to use more advanced exercises immediately then you would do far more damage than good. The stretches and jelqs are slightly more complex. You will not be using these exercises for a number of weeks. You will be e-mailed exactly what you should be doing that week, and these exercises will make up a part of your later routines. Advanced Stretching Advanced stretching it's just different ways of forming stretching exercises. They stretch different parts of the penis.

The Wrist Stretch The wrist stretch is a way of applying pressure to the middle section of your penis midstretch. It stretches the ligaments more authority, but could also do more damage to your penis if your penis hasn't been trained by doing the simpler exercises first. The Wrist Stretch involves gripping your penis just below the head, as with the standard stretch, and stretching penis directly in front of you, to the left, to the right, up and down. To add more pressure to this stretch, you take the wrist of your free hand and apply pressure to middle of your shaft as you stretch before force. So, if you were stretching to the left, you would apply the wrist pressure on the left hand side of your shaft. If you were stretching up, you would apply wrist pressure to the other side of your shaft. If you stretching down, it would apply pressure to the bottom etc. Please don't attempt the Wrist Stretch unless directed by one of our e-mails.

The Big Seated Stretch This is a very long stretch for those of you who have time and privacy. Each stretch takes 10 minutes to complete. By that I mean literally 10 minutes of nonstop stretching.

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Penis Enlargement Bible To perform the stretch, grip your penis while seated by raising one leg up and putting your hand underneath it then gripping just below the head. Then, pull with full force and hold for 10 minutes. For the next set, lift up your other leg and using your other hand repeat the process.

The Big Squeeze The Big Squeeze is placed in this section because it is more a stretch than a Jelq. This routine simply involves squeezing your penis by putting it on the table, and using the flattened palm of your hand, push down on the penis. For this you push firmly by placing one hand on top of the other and using all your weight to squash the penis. You separate the penis into the upper and lower parts, and push down on each for 45 seconds

Advance Jelqing Advanced Jelqing is for those of you who want to see big girth and length gains. We've already seen standard Jelqing, but these advanced techniques will do much more to improve your size. You will notice there are quite a lot of Jelqing exercises that you can do. After you have completed our program, you will be a pro, and then you can develop your own jelqs. However, by the end of our program you will probably have reached the size that you desire anyway -- so you can forget all about Jelqing! Most Jelqing improves your length and girth. Stretching is reserved for length gains, but then length can also be obtained from Jelqing correctly. However, the main reason for using Jelqing is to improve your girth.

The Double-Handed Jelq Erection strength: 95% This is a variation of the standard jelq, the difference lies in using both of your hands instead of one. What you must to his start a standard jelq using your right hand, moving it up your shaft by about an inch, then with your other hand grip at the very base i.e. where your first hand started. Your left-hand is being used to trap the blood.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Now, with your right hand, jelq all the way up to just below the head of your penis. At this stage lots of blood will be trapped. Now, to gain length, finish your jelq with the first hand (your right hand) and slowly move your left hand up to just below the head. Then, take your right hand and gripped the very base again and continue this cycle. Important things to remember: your penis must be, and remain 95% erect. Only ever do this exercise after you have warmed up properly. This exercise is mainly for length gains, but by making a small variation you can turn it into a girth jelq. That is what we shall be looking at now...

The Double-Handed Girth Jelq Erection strength: 95% This Jelqing exercise is designed solely for improving girth. Start as you did the previous exercise -- so that your hands are either end (one at base, one just below the head). The only difference with this exercise compared to the last one is that this is your starting point. Now all you have to do, when there is lots of blood trapped in your penis, is to slowly push to hands together while maintaining a tight grip. What you will notice is that your shaft is being expanded as the blood is forced outwards. This is held for 30-60 seconds. Important things to remember: again, your penis must be, and remain, 95% erect. Only ever do this exercise after you have warmed up properly.

The Double-Handed Girth Bend Erection strength: 95% This exercise is similar to the last. With one hand at either end of your shaft, literally bend the penis forwards slowly, ruling it so that the bend moves from top to the bottom. Do this for 30-45 seconds. Repeat the exercise but in reverse i.e. bend it the other way.

The Ultimate Girth Jelq Erection strength: 95% Copyright Š PenisEnlargementBible.com. All rights reserved.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Similar to the Double-Handed Girth Jelq, the object of this is to force your hands closer until they almost touch. The time spent on the movement from each end of your shaft to the center point should be 30-45 seconds. You can concentrate on different parts of your penis shaft while doing this. If you want to see more gains at the base than simply don't move your base and. If you want to see more gains closer to the tip, then don't move your upper hand. You can mix up the exercise depending on whether your girth gains are level or different at different points of your penis. Important things to remember: 95% erection. Ensure that you warm up.

Warming Down Each step of exercises should be ended with a gentle massage and a warming down session with the help of a hot towel. When you give a massage to your penis and apply some heat to it, it helps healing and rebuilding of the cell tissue. You see, heat promotes faster growth of tissue cells and it restores the sensibility problems you may have had during your enlargement exercises. So after each exercise, you have to massage your penis softly for about 1 minute. You should perform a soft and circular motion with your forefinger and middle finger along the base and the shaft of the penis. Be very gentle with your moves here since your penis has just been through some serious hard workout. Following the massage session, you should apply another hot towel around your penis, just like you did for the warm up. This part of the practice is as essential as the first one because the heat will stimulate the damaged parts and will make them function well again.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Penis Exercises: The Schedule

This is the schedule that you can start today. Alone, it won't have any affect. Until you have assimilated all of the required nutrients and biochemicals into your body, you will just get improved erections and maybe a very small amount of growth. Usually it takes 10 weeks to see real gains, but you will notice a harder penis after a few weeks. Biochemical growth will cause rapid growth – it's what worked for me when I finally after years of trying – stumbled upon the secret to getting a bigger penis. But exercises increased the speed at which I gained by about 22% when those biochemicals were present. Here is the exact exercise schedule that I used...

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Exercises

Weeks 1-3

Time spent on exercises per day: 15-20 minutes. Gently massage your penis and surrounding area with a warm cloth. You want to loosen up your penis and the muscles around it. Do this for 2-3 minutes. Standard stretching is the only way to begin! For this hold each stretch (outwards, up, down, left, right and around) for 30 seconds. Your penis must be flaccid to do this or you will hurt yourself. Go through this cycle twice. Exercise you PC muscle in the process by flexing it in the manner similar to controlling your bladder flow. This technique helps you preclude premature ejaculation. After 20 minutes, give your penis a rest. Wrap a warm towel around your penis and then repeat the routine after a few minutes of sufficient rest. Now continue on to the standard jelq. Do this for 10 minutes, and then warm down. Perform these exercises 5 days a week. Give yourself the weekend (or any two days) off. You will notice that your erections become harder and you may see a little growth. In week 3 spend 10 minutes doing the Double-Handed Jelq as well. Exercises to use: Standard Stretching Standard Jelqing

Weeks 4-5

Time spent on exercises per day: 15-20 minutes. Exercises to use: Standard Stretching Take a seat with you back vertically straight and mare sure to lubricate you penis. With one hand, grab the base of your penis squeezing the

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Penis Enlargement Bible penis shaft as you move towards the penile head. Once there, use your other hand and start anew. Do the squeezing routine for 3-5 seconds as you moved from the penis base to the head. Repeat this action over a 5 minute period without attaining a full erection or ejaculation. Standard Jelqing Gently encircle your penis and moving your hand up to the head, concentrate of pushing the blood up the penis. On reaching the head of your penis, take your other hand to the base and perform the same motion with your other hand. The Wrist Stretch Grip your penis firmly just below the head and stretch it gently to the left, to the right, up and down. Repeat this technique for about 5 minutes. The Big Squeeze Place your penis on the table, squeeze and put pressure on your penis with your palm firmly. But donâ€&#x;t be so hard on your penis. Keep repeating this for about 2 minutes.

Weeks 6-8

At the end of this cycle you will have your body at its optimum. This is the last transitional stage. Because of that you shouldn't do everything yet. However, you can split your exercises into morning and night. You should do more advanced, intensive jelqs and stretches as your penis starts to get ready for growth. Spend between 20-30 minutes a day exercising. Now you can do everything but the Ultimate Girth Jelq and the Double-Handed Girth Bend. If at this stage you have already begun to see growth then by all means do the others. You'll now know the feeling of a good workout so you will know which exercises you respond to best. Also, mix up what you do. Keep your routines fresh for the best results.

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Penis Enlargement Bible Week 8

Well done, my friend! You have been through a great experience towards enlarging your penis. Don‟t get too excited though because your first week is nothing. But now you can create your own routine. You‟ll have noticed what you respond to best. Tailor-make your exercises and growth will happen. Spend at least 15 minutes a day on intense workouts.

Note: Before any exercise you have to warm up and afterwards you have to warm down.

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Penis Enlargement Bible

Conclusion

That's the basis of penis exercises! This is a complete part of the system that I discovered (almost by accident!) which caused my penis to get bigger by 3 inches in length and 2 in girth. Why am I sharing this? I'm sharing this information because some really sneaky “gurus” are selling this information and making a profit out of it. That would be cool, and I'd be fine with it if it worked. But, here's the thing, it doesn't on its own! I personally wasted hundreds, if not thousands of dollars on penis enlargement stuff. And ALL of it failed until I stumbled upon the solution that worked wonders for me. So, this free guide is here to stop you getting ripped off. I am not a wealthy guy and at some points when I shelled out a fortune on these products I was really frickin' poor. So if I help one guy save a bit of money and get better educated then I think this guide is a good thing. So how do natural size gains happen? I've said exercises accelerate growth, and here's how my complete system worked for me. Please remember that I'm not an expert! I'm just a regular dude who found

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Penis Enlargement Bible something that's worked incredibly well for me and the few people I shared this info with. The way that my biochemical method works is by making your penis naturally grow. All you need to do is to restart the production of certain biochemicals in the body. These biochemicals were responsible for growth when you were going through puberty, and can be made to be produced in the body now, just like they were then. If you can do this then you will begin penis growth. Most people don't know about this vital technique because the enlargement industry makes much more money selling very expensive methods which don't deliver results. However, getting your body ready to make your penis bigger is the only way (other than surgery) that you can cause real gains in your penis size. That is the reason why other products (as you probably have discovered) fail, because they ignore this highly important aspect of growth. The way to make your penis bigger is by getting those biochemicals (which caused penis growth during puberty) back in the body. Then: BOOM! You will start to see gains. If you guys are interested in this then let me know. If you're not part of my members email list then sign up now - and you can email me directly from there! It's at www.PenisEnlargementBible.com. If you guys want these secrets badly enough then I'll tell you them! I would rather that than you getting scammed by the big businesses like I did. All the best. Your friend,

John Collins http://www.PenisEnlargementBible.com

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How To Increase Your Penile Length For Free Line Truth about penile enlargement lyrics. -- Friday October 31, 1997 (additionally Replayed on grasp Tape Theatre may 23, 2008 and Sunday, November 1, 2009) -- The Craziness starts. 10/31/97. 6:15am today was going to be a massive Halloween show with The effective Kreskin so Stuttering John was once up in Harlem getting some individuals to return all the way down to the studio. Kreskin needed a bunch of strangers to make use of in a séance that he'd be doing later within the show. Howard figured that settling on some persons correct out in entrance of a methadone clinic would be excellent. John acquired some drug addicts and other wacky humans to come with him for $20 and a few food. No longer too long after speakme to John on the mobile about that, Gary got here in and mentioned that Kreskin had arrived. Gary also complained about the way in which Kreskin slapped him on the back. He stated that Kreskin hit him so hard that it left a hand print on his back! It used to be still stinging 20 minutes later! Jackie had the identical difficulty with the guy. Kreskin mentioned that he does not imply to do it. It just happens. The Mike Walker recreation With guest Mark Wahlberg. 10/31/97. 7:30am Actor Mark Wahlberg, aka Marky Mark, got here in to plug his movie ''Boogie Nights'' which hits the theaters in these days. Howard spent some time speaking to Mark about his singing profession and about how he now not talks like a ''wigger''. Mark mentioned that he had to take voice classes to get that speech sample out of the way in which. He is a respectable actor now so he has to communicate higher english now. Crackhead Bob was once also there getting made up as ''Crackenstein'' for halloween. Howard had him come in to play the Mike Walker sport. Ralph made him as much as appear like Frankenstein. Howard said the makeup was quality. Just earlier than enjoying the game Mark showed Robin his 1/3 nipple. Yes it is genuine, he has a 3rd nipple. So anyway, on to the Mike Walker game. Here are the 4 reviews, one in every of them is a fake. The article is to select the false story: keen on Wil Smith crashed her auto making an attempt get to him. After the crash she ran over to get his autograph without stopping to peer what happened to the auto she hit. Brett Butler is in quandary again along with her cursing parrot. The father and mother of her child co-big name are upset with the word that come out of the parrots mouth. When Jerry Seinfeld ran into Tim Allen at a restaurant he went over to congratulate him for his new $1.6 Million per episode contract. Jerry despatched his bill over to Tim with a written message announcing ''To the quantity 1 paid actor from the quantity 2, thanks for dinner''. Kelsey Grammar is trying to get his spouse Camille a permanent job on his television show ''Frasier''. Camille says that if Jenny McCarthy can have a exhibit why cannot she. First to bet was once Crackenstein. He picked quantity 2 because the false, Mark Wahlberg picked number 1, Robin picked three, Howard picked four and Jackie picked 2. Fred sat out for this one. The exact false story was quantity 2. Amazingly Crackenstein was the one one to get it proper. After the game Howard spent a couple of more minutes with Mark. The Craziness Continues With The robust Kreskin. 10/31/ninety seven. Eight:20am word: This section will air on E! Tonight at 11pm! Now on to the significant part of trendy exhibit. The mighty Kreskin got here in to do a séance and to have any person channel the late Sam Kinison. He chose about 20 individuals for the séance. The individuals had been seated at bridge tables and i believe there have been four per desk. Kreskin had the folks hold palms and after pronouncing just a few words the tables had been shaking and falling apart correct in front of everybody's eyes. Probably the most guys bought so freaked out by using the whole thing that he ran out in tears! It must were lovely real for that guy. He was crying anything about seeing his lifeless brother or whatever as he ran out. He later said that his brother died a few month in the past. I suppose he thought he was contacting him or something. Howard and Robin appeared amazed by using what was going down. Kreskin did a couple of exclusive things to illustrate what was happening. He had probably the most folks at the table take their hand away and the desk would discontinue shaking. After that trick used to be performed Howard needed to take a spoil. After the wreck they got here again and Kreskin had 7 people that he could be looking to have Sam Kinison channel by means of. He did some hocus pocus on the fellows after which had ''Sam'' converse through them. The one challenge with the entire thing was that every man contradicted the next. One guy would go into a Kinison voice and say that he overlooked medicinal drugs greater than his ex-wife and one more guy would say that folks should steer clear of medicines and reside existence easy and an extra man would say that he used to be pissed that his ex-spouse received married. It simply wasn't believable adequate. Kreskin would then ask the guys if they remembered what they had simply performed. Of direction they didn't. It was still particularly pleasing though. The strong Einziger Explains Kreskin. 10/31/ninety seven. 9:40am After Kreskin left, Scott Einziger from E! Advised Howard that he knew how Kreskin did his methods. They had a discussion for the duration of a commercial break and Howard notion that Scott's clarification was so ridiculous that he brought it up on the air. Scott instructed Howard that Kreskin does the whole thing together with his vigor of suggestion. It is still pretty effective even if that is how the fellow does it. But there were 20 persons that he did it to and Howard doesn't know the way the man can use his vigor of advice to get that many individuals to cooperate with him and make tables shake. It looks like Howard used to be still impressed with what Kreskin did even though he knows that they weren't quite contacting any useless people. The argument went on for a even as unless Howard made Scott do his own séance with a few folks. Remember the fact that he couldn't get them to do the identical factor as Kreskin. This whole dialogue finally become an excellent stupider one. Howard and Ralph had been arguing about why the celebrity Trek exhibit has a black Vulcan. Ralph would not feel it is correct. They argued about that area for a different 20 minutes after the Kreskin thing. What a full day of wackieness. -- Thursday October 30, 1997 -- author Les Krantz Calls In. 10/30/ninety seven. 7:35am This guy wrote a e-book referred to as ''The Definitive consultant To The pleasant And Worst Of the whole lot''. It has lots of facts for virtually the whole lot which you could imagine. Howard ended up speaking to this man 3 one-of-a-kind times during the exhibit today. The pointed out things like which state has the most Jewish folks in it and which metropolis has probably the most homeless. Listed below are a few examples: State with probably the most Jews - new york 1,645,000 number 2 is California with about 922,000 State with the least Jews - South Dakota, Idaho, Wyoming - tie with not up to 500 per state! Metropolis with the biggest percentage of black people - Detroit with seventy five.7% metropolis with essentially the most homeless men and women - New York city with over fifty five,000 city with the most important crime cost - Miami Florida So that's what the e-


book is set. There are a bunch of other things that they talked about when Howard talked to him later in the morning. A few of them are going to be within the sequel to this publication. Here are a few extra: The loneliest job - Astronaut Which vegetable has probably the most energy - Potato What day is probably the most fashionable for television viewing - Sunday Which race has the largest penis measurement - Scandinavian men the largest penis ever measured on a man - thirteen inches. New Jersey Governor Whitman Calls In again. 10/30/97. Eight:10am Governor Whitman known as in for the 2d time in 2 weeks to speak with Howard. She'll be coming all the way down to the studio on Monday. Howard is backing her for the second time now. Caller Who Slept with his Twin Sisters! 10/30/97. 8:30am This guy known as in to get some advice from Howard. He told a story about how he ended up slumbering together with his two younger sisters one night time. He is 25 and they're 19. He was helping them out with their laptop or something and so they ended up going out and getting under the influence of alcohol. After they got again to their residence one thing resulted in a further and they had sex. He stated it was once the firstclass intercourse he ever had. The man is married too. In step with what he stated his sisters seem like Crystal Bernard and his spouse appears like the lady who plays the tool Time woman on ''home development''. He mentioned that his sisters want him to come back up this weekend and he wanted to understand what to do. Howard didn't have so much recommendation for the man but i am definite he'll do what's correct.. And simply what exactly is the right thing to do? Aerosmith Autographed Guitar Giveaway. 10/30/97. 9:10am Howard had an autographed Les Paul guitar to present away this morning so he performed the homeless recreation. This is the place he gets a listener on the mobile and plays tape of a homeless guy answering questions. If the caller guesses adequately at whether or now not the homeless guy solutions adequately he can win the guitar. He has to get three out of 5 guesses correct. Listed here are the 5 questions and solutions: query Caller answer correct? What number of aspects does a rectangle have? Y perhaps 3.. Fallacious conclude this famous quote ''supply me liberty or give me. '' N Hope wrong What nation used to be Hitler from? N Germany correct What nation used to be Napoleon from? N England mistaken what's frozen water called? Y Ice correct As you can see the caller acquired three out of the 5 proper so he won the guitar. After that contest there were still extra inquiries to play so Howard and the group had been betting on the final result. Listed below are the questions and solutions for these: question answer proper? Where was once J.F.K. Shot? Florida wrong title 2 of the Beatles. Paul and ? Correct what number of children is triplets? Two improper who's Batman's sidekick? Robin correct how many hours are in a day? 24 proper The having a bet used to be crazy so i couldn't inform you who received essentially the most but Robin ended up popping out even after shedding relatively a bit. As Howard stated, they should have known how dumb the fellow could be on the grounds that at the commencing of the questioning he stated that he can't read. -- Wednesday October 29, 1997 -- Jackie's shaggy dog story book Hits The ebook retailers. 10/29/ninety seven. 7:20am ''Jackie The JokeMan Martling's Disgustingly soiled funny story guide'' has been released and is now being bought in booklet retailers in every single place the nation. Howard wrote the ahead for Jackie so you may need to assess it out as a result on my own. I am definite there are some funny jokes within the e-book additionally. Jasmine St. Claire comes in. 10/29/ninety seven. 7:25am Porno famous person Jasmine St. Claire was supposed to demonstrate an act that she's done earlier than where she has flames taking pictures out of her exclusive materials. She couldn't do it in these days given that she had a bit accident the opposite day. This factor that she uses has just a few tubes popping out of it to shoot the flame. One of the crucial tubes broke or melted and burned her exclusive area. She did have a video tape of another time when she did it though. Howard watched it alternatively. It have got to have a hell of a sight. She had like three foot flames taking pictures out of those tubes. I don't know precisely what it looked like however it need to were nuts. There were additionally 2 firemen who came all the way down to the studio for her demonstration however they weren't needed in these days. They have been dressed in full gear and had first help supplies just in case she harm herself. They did get the danger to look some of the video tape although. The Luckiest unlucky Man Alive, bill Goss, Calls In. 10/29/97. 8:10am This guy bill Goss wrote a publication called ''The Luckiest unfortunate Man Alive''. The guide is ready his many near-dying experiences. The guy mentioned 5 or 6 exclusive horrible experiences and i am sure there are more in his guide. Listed here are just a few examples of his close calls: At age 9 he nearly drown in a sink. He dangled off the side of a mountain even as mountaineering. He used to be hit via a auto that used to be doing about 60 mph and had an out of physique experience. A truck he was using loaded with 2000 pound bombs blew a tire and spilled the bombs on the street. He had a wasp fly in his mouth and sting him a bunch of times whilst driving a motorcycle. I'd steer clear of this guy if I had been you. Bad success seems to comply with him around. He's going to be signing books at the Borders books within the short Hills Mall in New Jersey on November 15. Deliver a difficult had and fire extinguisher.. A bit more wackieness before the man got off the cellphone. He once tried to get Howard's ebook ''personal parts'' taken out of ebook shops. His child picked up the booklet and noticed the photograph of Jackie sticking his finger into a man's ass. He wrote to the ACLU and a couple of different companies who instructed him that Howard had the proper to put up what he did. The fellow failed to understand that Howard knew about that after he known as in. Howard wasn't being a dick about it both. He was just interested within the guy's experiences. Jackie Breaking Copyright legal guidelines!? 10/29/ninety seven. 9:15am A photographer referred to as in to tell Howard that one of the crucial images in Jackie's new ebook had been used with out permission. The fellow who called in went out and purchased the book this morning and seen correct away that one of the most pix were his. He mentioned that he sends his pix to the copyright office in Washington DC a few weeks after he takes them so technically Jackie is breaking copyright legal guidelines. The fellow wasn't too upset about it although. He said that he'd settle for Jackie to devour some chocolate cake out of his ass or anything like that. We quite often have not heard the last of this little incident. -- Tuesday October 28, 1997 (common write up) -- Suzanne Somers/Queef lady/guy Who offers Oral To Himself. 10/28/97. 7:30am Suzanne Somers came in to plug a few things this morning. Her television show ''step by step'' has moved from ABC to CBS and airs Friday nights at 9:30am. Her publication ''consume quality, reduce weight'' was once one of her different plugs. She can also be selling her possess line of jewelry that she designed. She's also writing one more


guide about her life. The last one she wrote talked about the fact that she was once a bed wetter and all forms of different good stuff. Okay, ample about Suzanne's plugs. Howard instructed Suzanne that he had a woman who loves to use the Buttgrasp excercize desktop which Suzanne used to advertize on tv. He had the lady are available in to show Suzanne how so much she favored it. Well the woman came in and started the excercise and immediately there were farting sounds coming from her. She wasn't farting although, she was queefing from her vagina. The lady went on to demonstrate her talent for Suzanne and her husband Alan. She did quite a number of of them and even tried to do it standing on her head. That didn't work although. After that Howard had a man who claimed that he might ''Orally please himself''. The fellow wanted to get his band's song played on th. How To Increase Your Penile Length For Free Line air so he stated he'd show. The man isn't within the band, he said that he simply promotes them. The man needed a couple of minutes to get himself equipped for the demonstration so Howard took a business wreck and let the fellow go to the toilet to get himself exicted. They got here again from industrial and the fellow couldn't get himself in the right state of intellect however mentioned that he would nonetheless do it. For the time being a document company man known as in and said that he'd supply the band a demo deal if the man would sincerely do it. Good, the man did it and every person was once cracking up laughing. Howard stated the man gave the impression of ''..A fowl pulling a worm out of the bottom..'' as he was once doing it. Suzanne was once speechless. Howard did play the band's music but it surely quite wasn't that satisfactory. The name of the band is ''Quartermint'' or some thing like that. They've a web page if you are : www.Quartermint.Com. Earlier than Suzanne left she told a narrative about how she acquired pregnant at age sixteen without needing intercourse. She stated that she was wearing a skirt and her boyfriend was wearing denims. The boyfriend did his factor in his pants and he or she by some means acquired pregnant. After she left Howard said that he did not think her story. Whew! What a morning! Comic Nick DiPalo Calls In. 10/28/ninety seven. Eight:55am prior within the morning Howard was once speakme about how he awoke within the core of the night time seeing that he couldn't sleep. He ended up gazing The Tonight show with Jay Leno. He saw a comic performing some fairly funny fabric but he didn't know who it was once. That comedian became out to be Nick DiPalo. He called in to thank Howard for mentioning how funny he was once. Captain Janks, Crackhead Bob And Kenneth Keith Kallenbach are available. 10/28/97. 9:30am Janks, Bob and Kenneth are doing a mini-tour collectively so they came in to plug some of their look dates. Crackhead Bob even had his fiance with him. She regarded fine consistent with Howard. Bob is one fortunate man. He can barely speak or walk but he has a wonderful, dancer female friend. She advised Howard that she used to bounce on MTV's The Grind. She's now a hip-hop dance teacher. Howard spent most of the section talking to Bob and his woman (who's identify escapes me proper now). They have a just right sex existence and Janks mentioned they appear to relatively be in love with one a different. Kenneth Keith was once form of mellow in these days. He was once placing on his voice more than usual but he was once taking it handy. He mentioned that one in every of his songs will probably be featured on an upcoming WYSP (Philly Station) compilation CD. The blokes might be appering at the Micro membership in Philly on Friday night, Sweeny's on Saturday and a couple of other locations that I neglected. -- Tuesday, October 28, 1997 (As replayed on Friday, November 10, 2006) -- master Tape Theatre - October 28, 1997. Eleven/10/06. 6:00am Howard used to be off at present so we had yet another adaptation of master Tape Theatre which is a replay of an ancient okay-Rock exhibit. Modern day replay was the October 28, 1997 exhibit. I did a write up of this show again in 1997 however I've up-to-date it with what I heard today. All times are special than they were when the exhibit at the start aired seeing that they've cut out a number of the commercials that aired back then. Howard begins The exhibit, Takes A damage. 10/28/1997. 6:00am exhibit opening bits and songs included: James Taylor performing ''Carolina in My mind'' are living in Howard's studio, Geraldo Rivera introduction for Howard Stern. Howard mentioned they had a busy show coming up in these days. They had a guy who says he can carrier himself coming in as good as Suzanne Somers, Captain Janks, Crackhead Bob and others. He also recounted the exhibit made the information after they had Amy Heckerling within the studio the day earlier than. He read probably the most article swiftly after which took a industrial damage. Jeanine's Telepathic Powers. 10/28/1997. 6:05am After the wreck Howard mentioned men and women were calling him asking about the stock market. He stated the stock market goes up and down all the time and you can not manipulate it. He spent a couple of minutes talking to the fellows about why the market had taken a dive. He joked that Steve Grillo had misplaced a entire $18 available in the market. Jackie mentioned he was observing the market the day earlier than and it was once tough to see it take a dive. Howard had this woman on the phone through the title of Jeanine. He mentioned he received a letter from her the other day and he or she wanted to talk in regards to the invasion of her privateness. He was once looking to talk about that but the mobile approach sounded awful so he had to bitch about that. Howard mentioned that Jeanine thinks that any individual has been invading her privateness and she or he believes that she will tell, through her telepathic powers, that Steven Spielberg, Kate Capshaw, bill Gates, Paul Allen, Harry Anderson, Richard Starkey (Ringo Starr), George Lucas, Natalie merchant, Amy grant and others are persons who're invading her privateness. Jeanine informed Howard that she gets these thoughts in her intellect about these humans and she's been having them in view that 1989 or so. She's no longer definite why they're bothering her. She told Howard about these ideas she will get in her head and how she interprets them as men and women invading her privateness. Howard stated he believes that all of these folks are definitely working together investigating her for a film venture. He requested Jeanine if that's what she thinks is happening. Jeanine said she would not think that is the case. She also stated that she has no longer been dealt with for this situation. Jeanine said she is not in a position to work given that of these issues she has. She has this fame in view that of those folks and that continues her from getting a job. Fred performed the cuckoo clock sound at one point whilst they were talking to this girl. Howard took a call from a man who thought Howard was once main this lady on and making enjoyable of her alternatively of helping her. Robin asked Jeanine if she has someone to care for her. She mentioned she kind of has folks who aid her out. Her household tries to support her out with cash. Howard took an additional name from a girl, Terry, who would not believe that she was simply on the air when Howard informed her she was


once. She had to flip her radio off to realise that she was in reality on the air for the reason that of the prolong they'd. She then requested Howard ''what's up'' which drove him nuts. The girl instructed Howard that having the woman on the air shouldn't be a comic story and he is just not treating her this fashion. She mentioned that she's had an identical problems but she has learned to live with it. She then advised Jeanine that she has a intellectual illness and this is not going down to her and he or she knows for the reason that she's been within the same drawback. She cursed at one factor so Howard had to ask her not to use profanity on the air. Howard requested Terry who was contacting her. She did not supply any names so Howard said that he's beautiful definite no guys have been contacting her with the voice she has. Howard tried to get it out of her however she would not say who it was that used to be contacting her. He threatened to hold up on her after she used the S-word once more. Terry stated that she thinks that Princess Diana is not useless and he or she's truly hiding out so she will come out after she wins celebrity Search. Howard informed Terry that he heard from Princess Diana and she or he goes to come out when she wins big name Search. Terry stated she knows he is no longer telling the reality and is aware of that it used to be all intellectual. Howard was going to hang up on Terry however she did not want him to. She requested Howard to tell Sage ''hi'' for her. She was once looking to say that for an historical boyfriend of hers. Howard stated that the inventory market was once simpler to figure out than these two. Howard instructed Jeanine that he'd appear into this for her and let her go a short time later. He went to break right after that. Howard tests Out best 10 magazine. 10/28/1997. 6:35am After the spoil Howard advised Robin that he goofed on Ralph the day prior to this by way of putting a false penis in his shorts and telling him he needed him to examine out a feasible herpes sore on his penis. He stated Ralph used to be fooled for a few seconds but then he realized he used to be being goofed on. Howard stated he received a replica of this new magazine excellent 10 and it almost ruined his day. He mentioned all of the ladies are all ordinary and they are not able to have implants or some thing like that. He stated they are all hot and out of the 15 ladies, 5 of them stated that their favourite comic is Howard Stern. Gary could not believe that he learn via all of their profiles. Howard stated that this one chick, Jocelyn, was once so sizzling and showed the fellows her ass. He rattled off her profile for the reason that he had it memorized. He knew her favourite actor and all of that stuff. He figured he could get the woman after reading the profile. Then he came across Carolena who additionally said she likes Howard Stern. He figured two ladies who appreciated him within the equal magazine was lovely cool. Then he came throughout Angelie who additionally mentioned she likes Howard Stern. And then Lexie's profile printed that she likes Howard Stern as good. Howard stated he was going nuts after reading all of that. Robin failed to think that any of the ladies in reality even knew him. Howard informed Gary to ebook all of the women so that they could question them about the profiles. Howard mentioned the magazine has a waiter ballot where they ask waiters in unique restaurants where they ask about specific celebrities and the way they tip. Steve Martin acquired bad mouthed by means of probably the most waiters. Arnold Scwarzenegger acquired some first-class feedback. Faye Dunaway used to be additionally appreciated via the waiters. He read via a bunch of other celebrities that have been listed in that article. Rodney Dangerfield obtained some poor feedback while Tom Hanks used to be positive. Sylvester Stallone used to be terrible. Howard stated that Rick Dees was once listed in there and they stated that he's probably the most nicest guys in show trade according to the article. Howard's identify used to be additionally in there and he says he goes out of his way to depart great suggestions to make sure he does not go via this variety of stuff. He mentioned he once left a $30 tip on a $15 bill at a chinese meals restaurant. Gary said he knows that Howard leaves excellent suggestions and he is on no account complained at a restaurant. Howard learn the article the place any individual claimed that Howard has bodyguards with him when he goes out to devour. Howard stated that never occurs. Howard defined how he's taken protection guys out to dinner with him however they weren't working as bodyguards. He stated they're most likely simply guys who work for the men and women he's working for. He wrapped up the discussion about the magazine and stated that was the plug they have been looking for. He couldn't recover from the truth that all of these ladies had listed him of their profiles. He would also like to meet the waiter who dangerous mouthed him in that article he used to be simply reading. He stated he wishes the 5 females who like him and the waiter from that article to be brought in at the same time. Various Stuff. 10/28/1997. 6:50am Howard stated the guy who used to be coming in to perform fellatio on himself failed to need a prize, he wanted him to play his CD on the air. Howard wondered if he will have to deliver that guy in or read some comments from Yanni. Robin wanted to hear the Yanni factor. Howard learn an interview that was accomplished with Yanni where he explained why he would not wish to appear on the Howard Stern exhibit even though he used to be invited. Howard learn Yanni's rambling comment about why he failed to want to show up on the show. Howard stated that he seems to be a jack-off asswipe to him. Howard spent a short time speaking about how he was staring at Jay Leno's show the night before and how funny this one comic used to be on the show. He mentioned he'd like to listen to that act once more. Letterman had Mariah Carrey on his exhibit but she most effective carried out a song instead of doing an interview with him. Howard used to be also looking at Conan O'Brien's exhibit which was once form of lame. He also mentioned Tom Snyder's show and how awful that is. He pointed out how stressful that man appears and the way terrible his show is. He stated he's a horrifying guy and he's now not definite how anybody can watch that show. Kreskin Prepares For subsequent appearance. 10/28/1997. 6:55am Howard had Kreskin on the cellphone. He mentioned that Kreskin had some enormous news for them the other day when he called Gary and claimed that he had won 21 arms of Blackjack in a row. Howard inspiration that he had finished that before to different radio stations but Kreskin mentioned he has not ever finished that earlier than. Kreskin advised Howard he needs to do something on the exhibit the place humans bring of their own card tables. He wants 28-32 people to do this factor however Howard told him he does not have sufficient room in the studio to do this. Howard requested Kreskin if he could smash the tables over his head if the bit sucks. Kreskin just laughed. Howard requested Kreskin if this used to be going to be intriguing audio on the grounds that it is a radio show. Kreskin said it is going to be fascinating. He mentioned that probably the most persons they've in the room will feel that they've been taken over by way of Sam Kinison and they'll be equipped to ask him questions. Howard stated he thinks this is going to be worse than


Geraldo Rivera opening Al Capone's vault. Howard stated he are not able to wait to see Sam Kinison within the room when Kreskin comes in. Kreskin mentioned they're going to have a real channelling in the studio. Howard had to go to break a short while later. Suzanne Somers, Debbie The Queefer 10/28/1997. 7:15am Howard got here again from ruin and said he used to be backed up with guests. He had Suzanne Somers and the guy who was once going to fellate himself ready to come in. He spent a short time speaking about Cindy Crawford's television show and how he thinks that she should just preserve her mouth shut in view that she speaks in any such monotone. Howard had Gary carry in Suzanne Somers so he might interview her. He checked her out and mentioned her husband appears like hell but she looks satisfactory. He spent a couple of minutes talking to her husband and talked about this Buttmaster thing that Suzanne used to be selling. He told Suzanne they have got a woman there who used to be willing to illustrate the Buttmaster for them in the event that they desired to see that. Howard requested Suzanne if she wanted to look the Buttmaster thing and in addition this man who claims he can fellate himself. Howard had the woman are available to illustrate the Buttmaster. He had her take a seat down and provides it a try to see what exactly it does. As she was doing it the girl let out some queefs. Howard then said that this used to be Debbie the Queefer who makes sounds together with her private elements. Howard advised Suzanne that they weren't farts but queefs which were coming from her personal constituents. Alan mentioned that was once the Queefmaster. Howard asked Debbie how she does that. Debbie stated she's able to suck the air in by means of contracting her belly muscle groups. She validated it slightly extra for everybody. She even stood on her head and did some extra queefing at the same time standing on her head. She sucked in some air and blasted it out again. She blasted out a couple extra before Howard let her go. Suzanne surpassed over one in all her books for Debbie as she was leaving. Howard got back to Suzanne and pointed out her ebook sales and the way they may be doing (Suzanne Somers' devour first-class, shed pounds). He additionally brought up her mattress wetting and family lifestyles that he'd read about in her booklet. She mentioned how she was once able to stop herself from wetting the bed. Howard advised Suzanne he does not understand how she will be able to do an interview with Tom Snyder considering the fact that he is any such dangerous interviewer. She informed him about how she as soon as wrote him a letter saying ''fuck you'' after he had stated anything nasty about her. So Howard had to hit the prolong on her. Suzanne refused to do his exhibit for a long time after he made that comment about her however she finally went on and had fun. Howard informed Suzanne he had to carry this guy in to fellate himself due to the fact he was once jogging out of time. He informed Suzanne about how the man obtained booked for the exhibit and the way he claimed that he would fellate himself. Alan mentioned if he might try this he would on no account get out of bed. The fellow got here in dressed in a cover so no person would respect him. He additionally came in with a Playboy magazine to support himself get aroused. Howard asked the guy some questions on how he found out he would do this. The fellow mentioned he used to be about 12 when he figured it out. Howard stated that his song isn't all that high-quality but that is the entire intent he used to be there to do this. He desired his CD to be performed, that is it. Howard asked the man if he has ever accomplished a full completion of the act. Howard said he perhaps homosexual if he does that and did his cough ''haggot'' factor to the guy. Howard spoke to this man's band mate Marco who gave the man's name as Leon. They spent a few minutes talking however Howard needed to take a wreck earlier than they might get to this man fellating himself. Leon Fellates Himself In entrance Of Suzanne Somers. 10/28/1997. 7:40am After the spoil Howard requested Suzanne about Cindy Crawford and her terrible interviews. He moved on to this guy Leon who was going to fellate himself. Howard mentioned he had a guy from a record corporation on the phone who was once inclined to present the fellow a demo deal if he can sincerely do this thing. The guy mentioned that Leon has to finish the job to get the deal but Howard mentioned they would not be going that a long way with this man. Gary stated this man used to be in Tommy Lee territory with the dimensions of his penis. Suzanne mentioned she did not want any part of this whole factor. She informed the fellow to think of her as Chrissy Snow from Three's manufacturer instead of Suzanne Somers. Howard instructed Leon that if he might do that factor he would get a record deal. The guy couldn't get himself tough however he went proper ahead with the whole factor and began to suck on his possess member. Robin took a look and obtained amusing out of it. Gary mentioned the fellow has to be a fag if he likes doing that. Howard let the guy from the record enterprise, Matt, listen to this man's band Quartermint and the guy advised him the identify of the band was once horrible. Howard stated he had heard it already and it wasn't all that pleasant. He performed one song and stated he knew it was once going to be dangerous. Howard sang together with the song a bit bit. Suzanne additionally sang a bit of bit herself. Howard let the track play via however talked over it and goofed on the fellow just a little bit. Leon gave out a web page nevertheless it was long past as of this writing (eleven/10/06). Matt told Howard to have Gary get a maintain of him and he'd talk to this guy a couple of record deal. He additionally obtained in a plug for the band Stereophonic which was once a band he thought used to be going to be enormous. Howard talked to Suzanne concerning the jewellery she's been promoting and the entire other stuff she's been promoting. Suzanne advised Howard about all of that stuff for a short while. Howard gave her a plug for her guide and looked through it to look the cute pictures of her. Suzanne instructed Howard about how she bought pregnant by means of a guy despite the fact that they did not have intercourse. She believes that it happened through her panties after she fooled round with the fellow. Howard also requested about having intercourse with Suzanne and Alan did not seem to have a lot of a quandary with that. Howard spent a pair extra minutes talking to Suzanne earlier than going to industrial damage. Montreal ratings studies. 10/28/1997. Eight:05am After the wreck Howard learn a observe from their Montreal radio station and the way they had gotten a giant scores enhance due to the fact that going on the air up there. He said CHOM was once doing very well due to the fact striking him on the air. Howard went by way of that article and bragged about how popular they had been up there already. He mentioned that some folks could not feel that the French individuals up there would be being attentive to Howard Stern after his anti-French rant he did on his first day on the air. Howard performed a news record from up in Canada where they suggested on his rankings up in Montreal. They have been already watching to get him kicked off the air. Howard


had to fart so he had Jackie pull his finger. He said he is been consuming a lot of peanut butter today and that's why he used to be farting. He additionally bought in some plugs for Reebok seeing that their garments had been becoming him perfectly and he relatively favored likes them. Comic Nick DiPaolo Calls In. 10/28/1997. 8:15am Howard had comedian Nick DiPaolo on the cellphone. He was the comic he was talking about seeing on The Tonight exhibit the night time earlier than. Nick advised Howard he really liked the first-class comments. He informed some of the jokes he used to be telling that Howard liked. He was joking about staying in lodge rooms where the warmth or air conditioning is on full blast and also you emerge as with stuff for your nostril like Triskets. He additionally made the whistling sound that his nostril makes with that crap in his nostril. Nick also told Howard about how he had some problems with this man Bud Friedman. He mentioned Bob Schimmel was worried in the court case he was concerned with. There were 4 comedians complete if that's the case. Howard virtually guessed that Schimmel was part of that when you consider that he just figured he used to be the type of guy who would get into whatever like that. Nick advised Howard how his chum known as him to let him comprehend that he used to be talking about him this morning. He really liked what he was once saying about him. He advised Howard a different story about how he had a tumbler thrown at him at a membership he used to be at one time on the grounds that of a funny story he told. Howard thanked him for calling in and let him go a short while later. Jackie stated he knows Nick however not all that good. Doug Goodstein Calls In From Howard's leisure stop. 10/28/1997. 8:20am Howard said that Doug Goodstein used to be down at his rest discontinue in New Jersey. Doug said they had been looking to interview a number of humans down there but it surely wasn't all that busy. The leisure discontinue was on Rt. 295 in New Jersey. Howard said he heard that the leisure stop is a gay relaxation stop. One of the crucial truck drivers informed Doug that he used to be approached by a homosexual guy but there used to be no one around right now. Doug stated that there used to be one truck idling and one trailer however that used to be about it. Howard let him go a short while later. Howard had a child on the cell who claimed that his father had dated Robin at some factor. The kid advised her his father's title and where he claimed to have dated her however she denied ever having dated a guy by that name. She said she used to be certainly not a nurse in New Jersey like the kid's father claimed. Howard and Robin instructed the child his father have to have been mendacity to him. He let him go a short while later. Howard talked to the fellows about getting some homeless guys for the Kreskin thing that they had developing late within the week. Stuttering John mentioned that they needed to pay the blokes like $20 to get them to come back in. John stated he goes right down to the unemployment administrative center to decide on up the homeless guys they use on the exhibit. Howard thought that used to be actually a excellent notion. Howard recounted that Alice (crazy Alice), the girl who hates all black men and women, could be on the E! Show. He needed to go to interrupt a short while later. Captain Janks, Kenneth Keith And Crackhead Bob talk over with. 10/28/1997. 8:35am Howard got here again from spoil and performed a prank name that Captain Janks made to Ed McMahon as Jim Carrey one time. He then moved on to a guy from Merryl Lynch who was once giving them some recommendation on the inventory market. It was once actually Sal the Stockbroker pretending to be anyone else. Howard hung up on him after he made some dopey feedback not realizing it was once Sal. Howard had Captain Janks, Kenneth Keith Kallenbach and Crackhead Bob are available in next. He requested Fred to play the speech that Kenneth made for him one time that was beautiful humorous. Howard noticed a excellent watching woman who came in the studio and he was once advised that it was once Bob's fiancee. He stated she was way too scorching for Crackhead Bob. He told Bob that she used to be lovely. Crackhead Bob mentioned that he wanted Howard to marry them. The woman's title used to be Nina but Bob could most effective say it as ''Dina.'' Nina mentioned she loves Bob and she or he has now not cheated on him. Howard had her stand up and mentioned it gave the impression of she misplaced weight. She mentioned she's instructing dance and that helped her do this. Janks said that she's a just right watching woman. Howard heard that Nina was once cheating on Bob but when she swears she isn't then he'll have to take her word. The guy who claimed she was once cheating had hung up the telephone. Howard mentioned that Bob was getting fat. He requested him if he was having tons of intercourse. He stated he used to be but Howard heard that he used to be having drawback getting it up. Nina stated it's no longer a challenge now, they're getting it on just pleasant. Bob stated that they're doing it once each couple of weeks. Nina informed Howard that she's on beginning control that continues her from getting her period and getting pregnant. She mentioned she would not get a interval seeing that of the photographs she will get. She stated that it reduces her intercourse pressure though so it is not that nice in terms of that. Bob told Howard about how he has intercourse with Nina and mumbled some stuff to him. Howard had them kiss and after they did that he figured they had been for real. He asked Nina if he is a just right kisser or no longer. Nina said that he is just right and advised Howard to give it a are trying himself. Nina advised Howard she dances for Bob so Howard asked her to demonstrate for them. She stated she used to bounce for the exhibit ''the Grind'' so Howard idea it used to be variety of funny that she danced there but now dates Crackhead Bob. She danced and Bob had some strikes of his possess as she used to be dancing. Howard informed them to take a seat down after that. Kenneth stated that Nina could stand to lose about 20 pounds. She told Ken that he could obtain 20. That perceived to confuse him. Kenneth instructed Howard about some post playing cards he had made up together with his face on them. Howard talked concerning the time that Kenneth seconded his nomination for Governor of latest York. He performed the audio from that day and acquired a few laughs out of that. Howard additionally had some tape of Captain Janks and Kenneth Keith having a snooze over. He stated that Ken taped himself slapping Janks within the face with dildos and stuff. Janks did not find out about that except Howard instructed him about it. He told Ken he'd better no longer go to sleep near him whenever soon. Howard requested Bob if he and Nina are going to get married anytime soon. They didn't have any plans so Howard wondered what was up with that. Nina mentioned she doesn't need whatever colossal, just a little anything first-class. Howard asked Bob if he's afraid he's going to lose her if he doesn't marry her. Bob said he is now not afraid of dropping her at all. Janks mentioned they fairly do appear to love every different when he hangs out with them off the air. Howard informed Bob he thinks he had issues getting it up for Nina seeing that of his crack use. She


mentioned it would had been her and perhaps it wasn't Bob's concern. Howard perceived to think it was Bob's main issue although. Howard requested him if he's ever finished anal on her. Bob is not considering that. Nina additionally mentioned that Bob would not like to give her oral however Bob stated he does that always. He misunderstood and did not understand what they supposed. Nina mentioned that Bob sucks her toes so Howard said he desired to peer that. He instructed Bob to go forward and try this. He put her whole foot in her mouth a short time later. Nina stated that women should appear right into a person's heart and no longer simply take them for what they think they are. That is why she's with Bob. Howard took a call from a guy who mentioned he went to tuition with Nina and she or he used to be the most up to date chick in university. He also mentioned he heard that she was once a psycho when she was once going out with one guy who was in college when she was once in high institution. Howard said she failed to look to be appearing like a psycho at present. The guy stated she need to be if she's going out with Bob. Howard observed the ring that Nina had on her finger from Bob and it seemed beautiful exceptional. She was once quite engaged to him and Howard stated he'd like to have visible her family's reaction to Bob being engaged to her. Howard asked Captain Janks and Kenneth Keith concerning the girls they've had and spent a minute on that. Howard requested if Bob's kids had met Nina yet. Bob said they had met her but he is not even equipped to consult with them himself. He said he thinks that due to the fact that he's on the show, his children have a drawback with him. Robin figured they were getting slightly bit of ribbing from their classmates over him appearing on the exhibit. Howard took a call from a guy who said that Captain Janks has been doing forgeries of Howard's autograph for books he used to be giving away. Janks asked him what club he had gone to the place he won the guide he used to be talking about but the guy could not don't forget. Janks figured he was once filled with crap and wasn't telling the truth. Howard wrapped up with them and went to interrupt a short time later. And sooner or later. 10/28/1997. 9:05am After the damage Howard had Robin her information. Howard spent some time speaking to Jackie concerning the inventory Market when you consider that he appears to be into it. Jackie mentioned he's particularly now not but no person believed that. Howard took a name from crazy Alice late in the information and informed her she was going to be on the E! Show. She went off on Robin a bit of bit and stated that this was once Howard's show and she will not be speaking to her. Alice said hey to her favorite person Fred and to Baba Booey as well. Howard wrapped up the exhibit after that and ended it around 9:45am (grasp Tape Theatre Time) -Monday, October 27, 1997 (As replayed on Friday, may just 18, 2007) -- master Tape Theatre - October 27, 1997. 05/18/07. 6:00am This week's grasp Tape Theatre used to be from October 27, 1997. This show used to be in my archives but not very certain. I've written it up at present with more details as if I had been listening to it for the primary time. The usual write up is below this one. No trend Award For Howard. 10/27/1997. 6:00am exhibit opening bits and songs included: ''Throw Yo Mama From The coach'' bit, Stone Temple Pilots performing ''Seven Caged Tigers'' reside in Howard's studio, Jay Leno intro for Howard. Howard began off the show asking what happened on the VH-1 fashion awards considering that he was once nominated for an award. Fred mentioned they are now not imagined to air unless Tuesday. Howard asked Robin if she knew if he received. She stated she thinks that it could have made the information if he had. Howard figured it would have made the news and gotten some publicity for the show however they wouldn't want that. Howard mentioned he bought a satellite tv for pc dish so he had to spend the weekend programming it. He mentioned he is bought about 500 channels so it can be hard to find just what you wish to have. He did that and then watched a number of tv over the weekend. Robin said he should be pleased that she's there, she needed to be rescued this weekend. He advised her to avoid wasting that until after the ruin. He stated they have been there are living, this wasn't a ''fine of'' or whatever like that. He went to interrupt a short time later. Howard causing Controversy In Canada. 10/27/1997. 6:15am After the destroy Howard played a information clip from a Canadian information record the place they had been speaking about how the CBC maybe disposing of Howard from the airwaves up there. They played a couple of clips of him joking around and making comments about passing fuel through his ''smelly bunghole'' and matters like that. In addition they mentioned how amazing his ratings were up there after he raised the station's ratings by 250 percent when they put him on in Montreal. The document goes over the code of ethics the station has and how they is also getting rid of Howard for violating them. They are saying there will have to be no abusive comments in regards to the folks. As the fellows have been listening to that file there was various laughter coming from Howard and Jackie. Howard said he appreciated the file. He thinks that he is on the whole broken every regulation there. He requested for them to put off him from the air already, he is bored. He mentioned they have got a lot more of Canada to conquer after that. He and Robin talked about one of the vital jokes he mentioned during the click convention they were pulling rates from. Robin misplaced On A Horse For three Hours. 10/27/1997. 6:20am Robin said she went out horse back riding the day before today and obtained misplaced within the woods. She said she was with a pal, or else she'd generally nonetheless be out lost. Howard mentioned he was once out riding his bicycle and he invariably ends up getting misplaced too. He said he has to retrace his steps to get back. Robin stated she was once out for roughly three hours trying to find her manner home. She said the entire trees looked the equal and it was once hard to seek out her manner again. She said the horse certainly led them out of the woods where they were lost. She mentioned that they both ran into picnic grounds or useless ends. They even noticed a map at one point however that did not help them either. Howard stated Robin's horse ought to have subsequently earned it can be maintain after getting her dwelling. Robin mentioned the horse simply went up the hill that she concept they couldn't go up. She mentioned she did not wish to go up the hill but the horse just went correct up and over. She stated she had folks ready for her in manhattan on account that she wasn't presupposed to be out within the woods like that. She mentioned some folks were despatched out to find them when you consider that they have been long past see you later. She heard a megaphone asking if she was once misplaced. They definitely found her when you consider that they heard hear laughing in the market. Howard said that he figures that they have got about .005 percent of their listeners using horses that can relate to her culture. Robin said that they were lucky on account that it was once beginning to get cold out and her pal's toes were starting to freeze by the time they received out of there. Howard said they have been ordinarily simply one


hundred yards from the barn and didn't even know it. Howard Talks About This New thing known as satellite Radio. 10/27/1997. 6:25am Howard said he bumped into a guy who used to be going to be jogging in the New York city Marathon and he just can't suppose doing some thing like that. He said he was going to run in a race this weekend but backed out considering the fact that he did not want people yelling at him as he was once walking along. He used to be registered under one other name however figured that there can be photographers there seeking to take his picture. He proposal about it lengthy and hard and determined to only stay home and watch satellite tv for pc. He said he loves that satellite tv for pc thing given that the snapshot is mighty. He mentioned that most effective 3 million persons have this DSS however there is a new manufacturer out that is beginning anything called ''satellite tv for pc radio'' and they'll be equipped to stick digital radio to your automobile and there is not going to be any FCC issues with that. Howard stated that you simply have to envision that for the long run. He stated that in 10 years from now it would be significant. He stated that you simply'd must get the radios into the cars and in all places else. He said that you simply'd need this ''battery'' to position to your vehicle but it surely's rather a receiver. He mentioned that may be the dimension of the receiver, something like the size of 1 / 4. Howard located the article he was once studying about this ''satellite tv for pc radio'' and the way he thinks that it is going to create a bunch of new jobs and it will be beautiful good. He determined some other exciting articles that he learn at the same time trying to find that satellite radio article. He examine JFK Jr. Suing a hair dresser or anything like that. He eventually located the article in regards to the satellite tv for pc radio. The enterprise used to be called ''CD Radio'' and so they were racing to discover a vicinity for the studios. Howard said they were pondering of getting the studios in NY city. Howard said they had been pronouncing they needed $500 million to get the manufacturer going. Howard notion that used to be a lot of money and it might take a even as to eventually get it available in the market. Howard mentioned the satellite tv for pc powered receivers could be about the measurement of a silver dollar. He proposal it sounded lovely cool. Robin had many questions about it and wondered how the satellite tv for pc thing would work when you consider that they do satellite tv for pc stuff for the show and they handiest have a distinctive time to do it. Howard said that is when you consider that they hire time on the satellite to ship out the sign for the affiliates. Scott The Engineer's Curse Lifted? 10/27/1997. 6:35am Howard talked more about this JFK Jr. And the way in which he just leaves his woman and would not worry about it. He mentioned he could by no means do that after the way his mothers and fathers pounded matters into his head. He and Robin spent a minute on that. Howard mentioned that Scott the Engineer thinks that his jinx is long past now that he's placed a gamble and won. They had a fan call in and have him guess his $100 on a group he wanted to lose and they ended up profitable so Scott thinks his curse is gone. Howard mentioned if it used to be Scott's possess money and he had positioned the bet himself, he would have lost. Howard had Gary are available to tell a story about a curse that's on the Cleveland Indians and the place that every one came from. Then Scott came in to talk concerning the wager he had won. Scott stated it was once his possess cash, the guy gave him the $a hundred so it used to be his cash at that point. Stuttering John got here in and stated that they might guess on some games tonight if they wanted to. Howard asked Scott if he wanted to bet him together with his possess money. Scott stated that he would opt for the Dolphins however Howard instructed him he wasn't going to take the wager. He mentioned he did not need to take a gamble if he failed to feel in it. He mentioned that Scott is a loser and any guess he makes with him, he'll lose. He has to take a bet that he likes although. Stuttering John instructed them that they would take an additional game so Howard mentioned he'd try this. Scott stated the sport used to be a pot good fortune recreation and he did not need to bet on it. Howard stated he'd provide Scott whichever workforce he wanted however Scott didn't wish to go for it. Howard wanted to play cards in opposition to Scott so he instructed Gary to move get him a deck of playing cards. He spent a couple extra minutes speaking to Scott however mentioned he had to take a ruin. Scott claimed that his mind went along with his coronary heart when he guess on one recreation that he lost on no longer too lengthy ago. Fred did his impact of Scott and said ''My intellect went with my hair'' and started laughing as he mentioned that. The fellows all goofed on Scott for a pair extra minutes earlier than Howard had to go to interrupt. Sam Kinison From Hell Replay. 10/27/1997. 6:55am Howard got here again from destroy and replayed the clip of the cellphone call that they had with Sam Kinison from Hell (Craig Gass). This is what happened last week. Sam Kinison Calls In From Hell. 10/22/ninety seven. 8:30am every once in a while a cell line falls on the grave of the late comedian Sam Kinison so he's in a position to call the exhibit. In the event you don't feel that then a comic who does an powerful impression of Sam calls in as Sam Kinison From Hell. Sam called in and talked a bit of bit about lady Di and Gianni Versace being down there in Hell. He stated that when Versace arrived in hell the only factor he said was ''appear what this man did to my suit!''. Sam did not wish to speak an excessive amount of in regards to the death of girl Diana however he did said that Dodi Fayed has cheated on Diana with 3 of Sam's ex-girlfriends. He also stated that there's one good factor to return out of the demise of girl Di. He mentioned that he has ''. One kick ass limo driver..'' Sam's connection was once lost soon after that. The voice of Sam Kinison from Hell is played by using comedian Craig Gass from Seattle. After playing that bit Howard moved on and mentioned this guys's magazine and the way they have got a piece of writing about climbing and stuff like that. He mentioned that at the moment you are not looking for a compass like you wanted years ago. Now folks simply bring their cell telephones with them and in the event that they get lost, they consider they may be able to just use the cell. He mentioned there have been some guys who ended up getting lost and it cost the taxpayers $60,000 in search events to get them out of there. Howard Takes Some mobilephone Calls. 10/27/1997. 7:00am Howard took a call from a man who requested if it was genuine that there is a pronounced rift between Howard and David Bowie. Howard said he knew nothing about that if there was one. He stated he's quite often upset that he went on the Joan Rivers show and talked to Angie Bowie, David's ex-wife, and requested her to inform them whatever good. She then blurted out that she had caught David and Mick Jagger in mattress together one time. Howard said he rather respects his music and all of that. He said he really enjoyed his tune over the years but he's no longer definite what happened to him. He stated he thinks he's uptight about his bi-sexual earlier and that is why he probably variety of embarrassed by way of what came out about


him. Howard mentioned if Bowie comes on his exhibit, he'd higher do some of his historical stuff and not that new crap of his. Howard took an extra call from a guy who said he grew to become shut buddies with Tiny Tim towards the tip of his life. He stated he met him at an antique show one time and sat down and talked to him about his existence. He mentioned he would go to all of his suggests and matters like that. Howard figured that any person might do this but the guy claimed he had Tiny Tim's enamel and could show that he was close pals with him. Howard failed to care and hung up on the fellow. Howard took one other name from a guy who brought up Detroit and bought Howard speakme about that. He stated he worked there for a at the same time and knew how scary it would be there. Howard spent a short while talking about that. Howard took a name from Melrose Larry inexperienced who stated that he had some stuff that will blow him away. He stated that he failed to want to point out names but there are some individuals on his station out in L.A. Which are stealing from him and plagiarizing his exhibit. Howard mentioned that is common and he's used to that. Larry mentioned that they use first-rate American Nightmare of their opening of the exhibit. Howard mentioned it's on an album so that's no colossal deal. Melrose went on to speak in regards to the other matters the exhibit does to rip him off but Howard didn't wish to hear it. He instructed Howard that their names have been Conway and Steckler. Howard told Larry to get off his case and no longer name him to rile him up. He mentioned he is already in healing so he will have to simply depart him on my own. Howard mentioned he had the governor of latest Jersey on the mobile and could not spend time with Melrose. Melrose informed Howard that he's opening up for Jackie Mason at some comedy exhibit. Howard said he failed to feel that so he requested him to inform a few of his jokes. Melrose instructed Howard some of his jokes and Fred performed a bomb losing sound after every comic story. Melrose said he does 8 minutes opening up for Jackie Mason and gave Howard a couple of minute of it. Howard told him he relatively should simply take cyanide and get it over with. He hung up on him and moved on. NJ Governor Whitman Calls In. 10/27/1997. 7:10am Howard had Governor Christine Whitman on the cell. He talked about how she stored all of the guarantees she made before she was once elected and he was very proud of her for that. He said that he'll endorse her again given that of that and the fact that she did not force the coverage companies to scale down their premiums. He stated that if she had executed that, it in general would have chased them out of the state. Governor Whitman mentioned she has the same opinion with that. Howard went on to whinge about men and women submitting phony coverage claims and the way that factors rates to move up. Howard additionally talked to Governor Whitman about how he favored that she did not push for this late time period abortion ban that the right wing conservatives were pushing for. He additionally likes that she failed to sleep with Marv Albert. He additionally preferred that she saved her promise to name a relaxation stop after him. Howard said he's going to wait except about 2 days earlier than the election after which he'll start his push for Governor Whitman. He stated if they get rid of her now, they'd be making a significant mistake. He said that individuals don't particularly make up their minds except the last minute in elections. He stated he favored the way Governor Whitman appeared when he saw her on tv just lately. She's been making herself up effectively in this day and age. Governor Whitman stated she'd be in subsequent Monday and he or she was once watching ahead to that. Howard let her go a short while later. Howard said that Scott DePace was yelling about her no longer letting self-carrier gasoline stations in the state. He stated that's the final factor Scott should be traumatic about though. There are plenty of other problems that she's taking care of. Howard stated the guy who is strolling against Whitman is and ordinary man. Howard requested Scott DePace to come back in to talk about his complaints. Scott stated that Jersey has a lot of laws which are ridiculous. He said that there is a law against self-service fuel stations and he does not like that. Howard instructed Scott that he's got a low IQ and is not arguing this stuff. Gary came in and stated that Scott have to be retarded because he pumped his possess gasoline in New Jersey only recently. Scott instructed him he couldn't have been in New Jersey. Gary puzzled what type of complaint that's considering the fact that that implies you do not have got to pump your own gasoline. Scott stated that used to be only a minor complaint he had. He is received others as good. Howard instructed him that's ridiculous and told him he's insane. Howard stated he had a man on the mobilephone who says that there's a law towards the self-carrier factor in New Jersey. Howard instructed Scott he would speak to Governor Whitman about that next week when she comes in. Satellite tv for pc television Discussions. 10/27/1997. 7:20am Howard bought back to talking about satellite tv for pc television and how fine the photo is. He stated he has to make use of cable to get the regional networks though so that's sort of tousled. He stated they will eventually work that out and they will get the regional channels on satellite television. He mentioned he loves it and how clear the snapshot is. He advised Robin that he'll must have her over to determine it out someday. Robin stated that she asked Howard to return out and spot her horse one time and he refused to contact it. Howard stated that they may be just significant, dumb animals and he had no desire to touch it. Howard said Jackie used to be there with Robin's horse and he was once bouncing on the item in contrast to Robin bouncing along with the horse. He said Jackie was bouncing on it so hard it looked like it would damage the horse. He mentioned that you simply must see Jackie on the horse, they ought to have tape of it because E! Taped it. Howard said he did contact that horse at some factor. He mentioned he used to be involved with the horse's nutsack. Howard talked extra about the satellite tv for pc tv thing and how many cool tv shows there have been to observe. He advised Jackie that they have a new field now that lets you appear at your menus and see television while. He stated it's very cool stuff. He informed Robin that he was looking at a soccer sport and likewise a countrywide cheerleading competitors. He mentioned they're some hot broads in that competitors. Gary mentioned that the indicates are typically subsidized by way of Tampax and that makes him suppose form of homosexual. Howard informed him it is a ways from gay and he is observing it for the sizzling chicks. Howard talked in regards to the stuff the commentators speak about throughout the competitions and how extraordinary they are able to be. Gary said he's noticeable some excessive tuition cheerleading competitions as well. Gary mentioned that there are quite a lot of ESPNs in the market now and they have all of that stuff on there. The blokes mentioned one of the crucial loopy channels they've out there now. Howard stated he blocks out most of that stuff due to the fact that he would not watch it. Creator With 3 Personalities, Jeanie


chippie, Calls In. 10/27/1997. 7:30am Howard mentioned that he had this girl Jeanie chippie approaching the show. She has three distinctive personalities. Howard said they may be speaking to all three of them in these days. He received her on the mobile a short while later after Fred played some horror film music. Howard requested Jeanie if she's a kook. She stated that she's no longer cuckoo at all. She claims that everyone has three personalities and wanted to provide an explanation for what she meant. Robin asked if she qualifies for the carpool lane with those three personalities. Howard didn't wish her to keep goofing on her like that. Howard asked Jeanie about what happened to her that made her like this. She mentioned that she did not relatively have the chance to increase when she was once a baby. She stated that she wasn't molested or whatever like that however her father was an alcoholic and he dealt with her very poorly. She stated that they determined their father passed out one time and that used to be an extraordinarily stressful occasion for her and her sister. She said that once she had a destroy down in any case of that, she learned all of her personalities. Howard wanted to speak to the one-ofa-kind personalities individually however she said that on the whole wouldn't happen. She stated that they're all built-in. Howard asked Jeanie if she had exclusive types of garb and matters like that. She mentioned she without doubt did and some personalities would not touch the opposite's garments. She stated that she's all integrated now so these separate personalities don't come out like that anymore. Howard requested her if she ever woke up with a sore ass after some of the personalities went out and had anal. She said she would not keep in mind if it ever did. One among Jeanie's personalities was called JJ and she used to be the promiscuous one who would exit and prefer up guys. Jeanie mentioned that every body has similar personalities in them and that's what she writes about in her book ''naked As We Stand.'' Howard said he was once hoping that her personalities would all come out and start arguing with each other or something like that. Howard requested her how she wrote the guide if she would not understand what her other personalities did. She said she was once ready to do it years ago. She mentioned they advised her there was nothing physically incorrect with her and it was all from now not constructing in most cases as a child. Howard took a name from a lady who claims she's obtained three personalities as good. Howard asked her if considered one of them is a whore. She said ''oh fuck yeah'' to that. Howard requested her just a few questions on that however he said he used to be getting burdened by it all so he gave up on it and let each of the ladies go. Howard took a name from a guy who said that this is simply an excuse for those ladies to head act like whores. Howard agreed with him. The caller additionally stated that he thinks that any one can write a booklet now that he's heard that lady. He also mentioned he feels like going out and being a whore proper now. Howard had to go to break after that. Horrifying technological know-how - youngster screens. 10/27/1997. 7:55am After the break Howard had Steve Grillo within the studio. He asked him to maintain quiet for the reason that he has no persona. He instructed Steve he might leave for now except he will get to his fashion Awards protection. He said he had this guy on the mobile who says that these youngster monitors which can be out now will permit you to pick up neighbor's monitors. Howard bought the guy on the phone and asked him what occurred to him. The man mentioned that they have been actually picking out up a cellphone conversation on their little one monitor. He said that the 2 ladies that have been on the cellphone have been lesbians they usually had been arguing about their snoozing preparations. Gary mentioned that he can select up his neighbor's little one monitor in his apartment. He figures that they may be able to hear them as good so that they be certain they on no account say something in entrance of the monitor. Howard said that one time a listener referred to as in and mentioned that he had heard Stuttering john on the cellphone with someone so he referred to as in and repeated the conversation verbatim. Jackie did not know about that and he was once the one on the other finish of the telephone. Howard talked about how Gary used to be treated relatively poorly through this girl at NBC when he worked for her. Gary mentioned that she used to yell at him all the time but she'd by no means curse over the two-way radio. Gary said sooner or later he obtained a cell call from a man who mentioned he might hear these conversations and Gary should tell her to head fuck herself. Gary mentioned that it's great that any individual knows how he's getting yelled at, that method he is not on my own. Howard mentioned that NBC would go through this whole factor to make it look like that lady was once doing information studies when it was once clearly Gary feeding her knowledge from the station. Additionally they talked about the men and women that they had who would volunteer to call within the traffic expertise again then. Stuttering John got here in and said it used to be particularly bizarre to have folks telling them about conversations they've had on their cordless telephones. Gary stated that he heard a narrative about Madonna that used to be apparently spread after individuals heard her speaking on a cordless cell. Gary had a further story to inform as well. He tried to sell an condominium but he wasn't in a position to promote it so he sublet it out to a lady. He said that he rented it out to this woman and went over to determine it out to scrub it up. He asked the woman if he would have his cleansing lady over there. She mentioned that was excellent so he sent her there. She stated that he called the woman to depart a message forgetting that his cleansing woman was once there. Then the cleansing girl picked up and advised him how messy it was once there. He informed her he knew that and that's why she was once there, the lady was a pig. Then he heard the answering laptop squeal and realized that the lady was going to hear the answering computer message. He obtained a name from her later laughing telling him that she'd heard the message. Debbie Gibson And Kreskin Discussions. 10/27/1997. 8:05am Howard said they requested Debbie Gibson to do the exhibit however they wanted her to do a tune parody for them. They came up with a track parody called ''Candle in my C**t.'' He played the music and explained that she didn't want to do it. He stated they're writing much more songs for her now on the grounds that she failed to wish to do this one. He said she rather needs to return in but on her own phrases. He stated that he is aware of what's higher for her than even she does so that is why he's not letting her are available until she sings this sort of songs. He mentioned this is the one way she's going to be in a position to vary her snapshot. Howard performed a brand new Crackhead Bob historical past second. This one used to be Bob as a bus driver and an air visitors controller. Howard took a mobilephone call after that. The caller requested how he might get in on this exhibit they are doing on Friday. Howard said they had been going to move out trick or treating however things aren't understanding very good for that. He said that they've this bus that they may be able to


use to go round doing that but there are quite a few matters that could intervene with the broadcast. He stated he gave up on that inspiration after hearing all of the negatives. He mentioned he thinks that different suggests do this stuff always and he is pondering that it is all about cash. Howard mentioned that he would not need to pre-tape the event, he needs it to be reside. The caller requested concerning the factor they're doing with Kreskin later this week. He said that Kreskin goes to come in and have some guest channel the real Sam Kinison. He stated they have got nothing to do with what Kreskin is planning. Howard stated he always suggestion Kreskin set that stuff up however he heard that they never did. Howard mentioned he heard that Kreskin used to be consistently excellent at being very observant at what individuals achieve this that is how he is been in a position to do these tips he's performed. Howard stated he desires to look how Kreskin pulls this entire factor off seeing that he's eager about it. He asked Gary to get him on the cellphone so he might ask him about it. Gary tried to get him on the line so they could speak to him. Howard said he'd like to speak to Kreskin's mother because he nonetheless lives at home along with her. Gary mentioned that they obtained an answering desktop in order that they needed to go away a message for him. Howard mentioned that they have got to get 5 persons down there to the studio and he is considering that they must be women. Robin said that they should have a costume contest to select the winners to come in there. A caller told Howard he labored for a tv exhibit that shot a Kreskin trick one yr and they had about 20 men and women picked at random and they had tables flying across the room and stuff like that. The men and women had been simply picked randomly so he is no longer sure how he managed to make that happen. He said they bought the tables, but Kreskin picked the people from the group. Howard stated that Kreskin is permitting them to decide on the men and women this time. Steve Grillo on the VH-1 trend Awards. 10/27/1997. 8:20am Howard introduced up the VH-1 trend awards and said that Steve Grillo went down there to interview some men and women. He had Steve come back in and then played a few of his interviews. Steve spoke to Montel Williams and requested him a couple of questions that he failed to answer. Howard mentioned he does not realise whatever Grillo says and he wishes to be an actor. Howard goofed on Steve a little bit bit about that. He mentioned that Steve did get a bit of phase in a television exhibit though. It used to be only a one liner in NYPD Blue. Steve stated he was once also in the movie ''Silent Prey'' which he got on his possess. Howard figured he was getting these materials for the reason that of his exhibit. Howard played another interview that Steve did with Dennis Hopper. Steve was yelling for him to come over to him. He requested him a few questions and Hopper answered most of them no challenge. Then Steve requested Norm MacDonald some questions. Norm questioned why he bought Steve to interview him. He said he'd rather have Stuttering john. Michael Moore was additionally interviewed by means of Steve. He asked him to sing somewhat of his favourite John Denver track and Moore sang for him. Moore wouldn't stop singing as Steve was asking him some other questions. Steve asked Fiona Apple a query and she or he flipped out on him about the question. Howard stated Grillo obtained kicked out after that so he performed some audio of that. The opposite press persons were yelling at protection to let him keep however they kicked him out anyway. Steve said there quite weren't any just right people coming to the click room. That led to him talking extra in regards to the section he had on NYPD Blue. His line used to be ''Rope head scumbags, we have now obtained exits on the front facet and the back.'' He mumbled by way of it so Howard and the fellows goofed on him about the way in which he supplies his lines. Howard puzzled if Amy Heckerling was once listening to all of these things considering she's a director. Director Amy Heckerling Visits. 10/27/1997. 8:30am Howard pointed out some of the films that Amy Heckerling has directed and the way nice a few them had been. She labored on quick times at Ridgemont high and Clueless which can be a couple of Howard's favorites. Gary brought Amy in a short while later. Howard mentioned he inspiration she used to be some old girl however she's good watching and now not so historical. He had her sit down and instructed her he used to be chubbing up seeing her. Howard asked Amy why she has Gilbert Gottfried over to her condo for dinner. She defined how she had been engaged to Bronson Pinchot for a even as so Howard obtained sidetracked speaking to her about him. He requested her if he's huge in the pants. Amy simply laughed. She said they started going out after he got here in and read for her one time. Robin requested her if she's visible his new television show. She instructed them that he moved out on her one night time that she was once out engaged on a film and hasn't visible him since. Howard had Gilbert Gottfried on the cell so he had the 2 of them speak about why that they had dinner collectively. Howard figured that Gilbert was going there seeking to get into Amy's pants. Gilbert stated he was in reality seeking to meet Bronson Pinchot. Howard brought up the contemporary name they obtained from Amy's babysitter due to the fact she used to be so upset with the way in which Gilbert acts in front of her. Amy stated that Gilbert is a ailing person and it is no longer clear where to draw the road with him. Amy stated that Gilbert asked her 12 12 months historical daughter about having hair down beneath and he used the C-word describing it. Howard asked Gilbert why he would do such a thing to a 12 12 months old. Gilbert stated he called Amy's condominium at some point and the babysitter acquired on the telephone first. He did an influence of her speaking to him and stated that the daughter began laughing at her. He said that eggs it on much more. Amy mentioned she form of likes that this is happening at her house. Howard requested Gilbert if he suggestion it was inappropriate to ask something like that of a 12 yr historical. He said he does like to get to know folks, so that is why he did it. Amy mentioned that Gilbert is the variety of guy who will insult the audience unless they are all long past and then stand there telling jokes to make himself chortle. She stated a man like that is not all there. Howard requested Amy what her daughter did when Gilbert asked all of those questions. She stated that she informed him that his career was over and he was down to just doing Cheerios advertisements. Gilbert said he is had Amy's babysitter name him at three within the morning to yell at him about the comments he's made concerning the Jews. He said she'll even put the 12 yr ancient on the cellphone to yell at him too. Amy mentioned she's type of torn due to the fact that she knows Gilbert are not able to aid it however he is announcing it to her 12 year old daughter. Gilbert said that they've left messages on his machine that he could not even play on the air. Gilbert stated that he can really upset the babysitter, Barbara, with the aid of announcing something lovely tame. They only keep getting on the mobile even after he says that stuff although. Howard let Gilbert go and obtained again to Amy. He told Steve Grillo he


could depart too due to the fact Amy wasn't going to rent him. He went on to ask Amy about the movie Clueless and how that all came about. She informed Howard that she wrote the movie simply so she would get whatever made. She mentioned she had to provide you with something particularly comfortable so that's the film she came up with. Howard advised her that it used to be some of the funniest movies available in the market and he can not think she came up with it. He asked if she had some thing to do with the tv show. She said she was involved the primary 12 months however after that she was once out. She mentioned she relatively favored Alicia Silverstone for the section. Howard asked her if she has a moustache. She mentioned it is simply the form of her mouth, it's not a moustache. Howard stated it relatively looked like she had one within the Batman movie she was in. Howard asked Amy how lengthy it takes to put in writing a film like Clueless. She stated it took about three months. She additionally pointed out how she received involved with ''quick instances at Ridgemont high.'' Howard said she have got to be really proficient and he is very impressed together with her. He requested her who she had the child with. She said it used to be a guy who wrote ''Police Academy.'' Howard mentioned that he is impressed with these power couples which might be out there. Howard advised Amy about the time Gilbert used to be in the sanatorium and the one visitors he had had been him and Robin. He stated no person in the press picked up that he used to be in the health center even though Gilbert used to be afraid they were going to. After months of no press Gilbert requested him to assert some thing on the air so perhaps any person would take detect. Howard stated he despatched some people like dice and Belzer to go discuss with Gilbert however Belzer simply sat there and read the paper while he used to be there. Howard stated Gilbert asked him to get a thermometer for him that learn digitally. He places on his commonplace voice when he makes calls like that so Howard was doing an influence of that. He mentioned Gilbert obtained all philosophical with him when he notion he used to be death. Howard stated he wondered what Gilbert used to be going to do if he left comedy in any case of that. Howard mentioned he had Kreskin on the telephone however he desired to position that off until the next day. Gary told him it used to be predominant so Howard tried to get him on the line. He wasn't having any success in the beginning but he finally acquired him on. Kreskin informed Howard that he was once calling from resorts in Atlantic city and last night time he lost some cash. He said he had 30 bucks left and went and won 21 fingers in a row which was once very extraordinary. He had protection standing next to him whilst that used to be going on. Howard failed to believe that was once earth shattering information like he used to be announcing it was. Gary said Kreskin will name him and inform him news like that and it can be just significant information for Kreskin. He stated that Kreskin advised him that it was once going to make the headlines. Howard moved on and talked to Kreskin about this thing they're doing on Friday. Howard requested what number of people he wishes. Kreskin needs 30 or 40 folks so he can decide upon from that crew. Howard stated that might be best with him and stated he'd get them for him. Kreskin said he'll pick a couple of dozen from that team and do his trick. Kreskin mentioned that they're going to check out and channel Sam Kinison but if they cannot get him, some thing loopy will occur. Howard let Kreskin go and obtained back to Amy. He stated he really didn't understand how excellent looking she was. He asked her what she's engaged on now. She mentioned she's directing ''night time on the Roxbury'' however Howard didn't get how they would make that right into a whole movie. She mentioned it can be actually an awfully candy movie. Howard asked her if she's relationship the short man, Chris Kattan, from the film. She requested why he would ask that and that made Howard believe that she used to be. He had pulled some thing out of the and acquired it correct. She would not speak about that with him but he swore that he failed to set that up. He swore on the lifetime of his kids that he failed to recognize some thing, he just guessed at it. Robin didn't think him but he stored swearing on the life of his children that he did simply bet. Howard mentioned he needed to take a wreck and was about to when Tom Chiusano got here in to remind him to take a wreck. Howard informed him to get out and said that he was going to do one more hour without a damage just in view that he had come in like that. He spent a few extra minutes speakme to Amy about her movies after which talked to her friend Jay who was once sitting within the studio. He talked to him and found out he's been acquaintances with Amy because institution. He is on no account boned her although. Howard informed Amy she appears very unhappy, like most administrators. He questioned if she used to be on her period in these days or some thing. She laughed and mentioned she wasn't on it however he idea she was once mendacity about that. Howard had Amy's babysitter Barbara on the telephone after that. She mentioned that she and Amy are on the identical time table for his or her intervals and she is aware of she's not on i. How To Increase Your Penile Length For Free Line proper now. Howard was once going to let her go but Gilbert was once on the cellphone so he saved her on. Howard let Barbara and Gilbert go at every different slightly bit for the reason that it was once so funny. Gilbert stated he calls the apartment and asks Barbara to put the daughter on the telephone and she'll put her right on and then he'll say that he wants to express regret and he or she'll put her back on. Then she'll ask him why he says matters like that to a 12 year old. Barbara was once explaining herself but Gilbert was once telling Howard concerning the matters he does to her to jerk her round. He was additionally doing an impression of her and goofing on the way in which she places the 12 yr historical right again on the line when he asks her to. Howard said this is the film she has to make, Gilbert and Barbara doing their cell thing. Howard let Gilbert hold going along with his Barbara influence. He endured to make enjoyable of her so Howard asked Barbara if it is true that she looks like him. She stated she has his hair but that's it, she's been informed she appears like Grace Slick. Gilbert was once going a little too some distance together with his feedback so Amy requested him to stop. Howard made up our minds to wrap up with Gilbert at that point but then Barbara had extra to assert. He stored Gilbert on the mobile and let him goof on her accent even more. Howard and the guys were laughing as that used to be going on. Amy's buddy Jeff was once laughing beautiful difficult as good. Howard advised Amy that this used to be her largest nightmare. Howard let Gilbert and Barbara go and bought back to Amy. She mentioned how Bronson left her at the same time she was once shooting a film and he left the condo a large number. He had gotten mad at her for some rationale and that is why he left. Howard spent a couple of minutes speaking about that and then wrapped up and went to industrial. And subsequently. 10/27/1997. 9:25am Howard got here again from wreck and pointed out how


adorable Amy was. Robin mentioned she determined her very fascinating too. Fred mentioned it was once entirely unexpected to look how lovely she used to be. Jackie was once announcing that he suggestion she was once sexy however he was mumbling his lines. Howard stated he does that once he puts on his attractive voice. Robin received into her news after that. She talked about John Denver's loss of life and how it's resulted in his albums getting again into the top 10 album income. Howard stated he will have to have killed himself twenty years ago if that is the case. He told Jackie to do the identical and might be he might sell some extra documents. He stated it might be funny if Jackie did that and did not promote any albums. Howard had Robin get back to her news and had her finish up a short time later. They ended the exhibit around 10:10am (master Tape Theatre time). Robin's adventure In Horseback riding. 10/27/ninety seven. 6:25am Robin had to be rescued from a horseback experience this weekend. She was once out driving with a friend after they received lost. They had been handiest presupposed to be out for about an hour but ended up going for walks around in circles for one more 2 hours. They were ultimately observed by way of a search get together who heard Robin's giggle by means of the woods. Someone with a megaphone known as out to Robin and her buddy ''..Are you misplaced. '' once they heard Robin's exclusive laugh. Robin additionally stated that her horse knew his approach again better than she did. He without a doubt went in a course that Robin didn't wish to go in. Solution to go Blaze! New Jersey Governor Christie Whitman Calls In. 10/27/97. 7:20am Christie Whitman called in to speak to Howard for a couple of minutes this morning. Howard backed her in the final election and she received so she have to be coming again for his support as soon as again. Howard thinks that she's doing a fine job now so he will back her once more. She stated that she'll be approaching the show in individual sometime within the very near future. Woman With three Personalties Calls In. 10/27/97. 7:50am Jeannie chippie, writer of ''naked As We Stand'', has 3 personalities and she or he wrote about them in her e-book. Howard spoke to her about her personalities whilst she was once on the mobile. She did not get into to a lot element in regards to the other 2 personalities because she would not know exactly what they do when she's now not round. She quite didn't reveal anything that fine for the period of the interview. Probably there is extra in her e-book. She said that the booklet can also be ordered from Borders ebook shops. Steve Grillo at the VH-1 trend Awards. 10/27/ninety seven. 8:45am i suppose Stuttering John is laying low for a even as considering he will get kicked out of most everything he attends. Now Steve Grillo has been chosen because the celebrity interviewer. His luck is not significantly better than John's however he did get a few interviews on the VH-1 fashion Awards which were taped this prior weekend. Grillo received interviews with Montel Williams, Dennis Hopper, Norm MacDonald, Michael Moore and Fiona Apple. The questions all seemed to be generic's that they used for each interview. Here are a couple of of them: What the dilli yo? (a reference to Busta Rhymes look and song) How long does it take to get your accomplice in a position for intercourse? Are you able to sing a little bit bit of your favorite John Denver track? Montel Williams failed to play along for long. He variety of ran away after Grillo requested in regards to the sex companion thing. Dennis Hopper played along simply blurting out solutions. Norm MacDonald simply could not believe that Grillo was asking the questions. He concept that he deserved a Stuttering John interview as a minimum. He did not even reply any of the questions. Michael Moore went correct into a couple of John Denver songs when requested to sing his favourite and he did not sound half of dangerous! Grillo requested Fiona Apple about one of her videos and she went off on certainly one of her rambling speeches once more similar to she did on the MTV Video tune Awards exhibit. Finally of the interviews were performed Howard had some tape of Grillo getting kicked out of the click room. Individuals have been chanting ''LET HIM stay, LET HIM stay'' but it became out to be Doug from E! Who began the chant. Come what may the entire discussion grew to become to Grillo's acting career. He someway obtained a one line phase in ''NYPD Blue''. Howard goofed on him about that for somewhat while and then moved on to the Amy Heckerling interview. Director Amy Heckerling is available in. 10/27/97. 9:00am Amy Heckerling, director of such movies as ''Clueless'' and ''speedy times At Ridgemont high'', came in to hang around with Howard. Howard is a massive fan of Amy's and he was once kissing her ass like crazy this morning. In case you heard the show last week when Gilbert Gottfried was once on you could have heard a German lady yelling at him about making enjoyable of the holocaust. That girl is Amy's child sitter. Amy used to have Gilbert over to her condo for dinner and that's how Gilbert met the little one sitter. Good Howard had Gilbert on the mobilephone once more at present considering the fact that he heard that Gilbert asked Amy's 12 yr historic daughter if she was once developing hair where the sun do not shine. Amy's interview eventually became Gilbert and the little one sitter yelling at each other once again. Howard was laughing at Gilbert like crazy. Gilbert used to be doing his affect of the little one sitter's accent and Howard was once in stitches. Ultimately Howard bought faraway from the Gilbert dialog and again to Amy. He discovered that she used so far Bronson Pinchot however they lately broke up. Now she's directing ''night time on the Roxbury''. It can be situated on the Saturday night live sketch with the three guys who go to the entire golf equipment and leap their heads like morons. Howard said that he'd not ever think that a film like that would be good however Amy is directing it so it have to be excellent. Howard additionally discovered that Amy may be relationship Chris Katan from Saturday night time live. He simply got here up with the question out of nowhere and Amy did not say no to it. Howard used to be amazed with the aid of his psychic knowledge if you want to call it that. -- Friday October 24, 1997 (Replayed on master Tape Theatre Marathon, Friday, November 23, 2012) -- Howard Receives reproduction Penis From ''Boogie Nights''. 10/24/ninety seven. 6:40am the guys who designed the prosthetic penis that Mark Wahlberg wears within the movie ''Boogie Nights'' came in to reward Howard with a replica. The film deals with adult films in the 1970's and Wahlberg performs a personality with a massive penis. The fellows from KNB effects team produced a company new prosthetic from the equal mildew used for the movie. They provided it to Howard this morning. Howard took it and stuck it in his pants to see what it would be wish to have a massive penis. He felt proud. He was watching in a reflect and said that he was once now standing erect. No extra hunching over. He used to be proud. He stated that if he was in reality that large he'd do the exhibit with it hanging out. Ed Asner On The telephone. 10/24/97. 7:05am a few years ago Howard talked to Ed Asner a couple of guy on dying row. Ed and every other celebrities had been trying to save the fellow from the


dying penalty for some rationale. At present Howard talked to Mr. Asner on account that the fellow he was once looking to store was once killed through lethal injection this week. Howard variety of wanted to rub it in. Mr. Asner seems to believe that Howard is evil given that he believes within the loss of life penalty. They spoke for somewhat even as about the entire factor however there are so many details in regards to the case that it's difficult to maintain track. Jenny McCarthy is available in. 10/24/97. 7:25am The attractive yet, demanding as hell Jenny McCarthy got here in this morning to plug her e-book ''Jen-X'' which is in outlets now. Jenny has avoided Howard's exhibit prior to now in view that she was once afraid that her mother would discover about her breast implants. At the moment her mother learned considering she's no longer as dumb as Jenny thought. Jenny was co-host of ''Singled Out'' on MTV for a number of seasons earlier than getting her possess show on NBC this season. And before all of that she was once a Playboy Playmate. She gave the look to be just a little bit toned down this morning. She wasn't fairly as stressful as she by and large is. Howard spent about half-hour or so together with her talking about the whole thing from her bathroom habits to how many intercourse companions she's had. She turned out to be a greater visitor than I idea she would. She did not hesitate to talk about whatever that Howard requested her. Jenny additionally has a sister who is a massive fan of Howard's. That sister, Lynette, referred to as in when you consider that Jenny used to be speculated to convey her to satisfy Howard. Jenny mentioned she has been doing so much that she didn't think it used to be a just right time for her to come in. Lynette additionally has breast implants incidentally. Howard crammed a hell of loads into the 30 minute segment. It used to be overwhelming. Jenny's supervisor can be her boyfriend. He is 49 years historic, she's 24. Howard talked to him for a little bit additionally. Most of the stuff they mentioned is in the ''Jen-X'' ebook. The Mike Walker recreation. 10/24/97. Eight:15am No time wasted in these days, they received proper to the game due to the fact there used to be a lot happening on the show. Here are the four reviews, one in all which is false. John Travolta has been upset nowadays because he close to purchased an aircraft just like the one John Denver was flying when he crashed and died. A girl who locked her keys in her automobile one evening used to be helped out by a person in a baseball cap. The person broke into her auto with the oil dipstick. The woman didn't know who it was unless she got in her automobile and the light shined on his face. It grew to become out to be Kevin Costner. Comedian Drew Carey was once heckled through some man at a comedy membership. The fellow used to be kicked out but waited for Carey outside. They bought in a fight however when Drew tackled him to the bottom the guy stated he used to be simply upset given that he was once having marital problems. Drew, the nice man that he is, drove the man house. David Hasslehoff from ''Baywatch'', who's a colossal song megastar in Germany, wishes to get his singing profession going in the U.S. So he wishes his personality to begin singing in nightclubs on the show. The other producers of the exhibit say no means. Stuttering John was taking part in at present and he selected quantity 2 because the false story, Jackie also chose number 2, Robin chose 4 and Howard picked quantity 1. The genuine false story was number 2. Tommy Lee On The phone. 10/24/ninety seven. Eight:40am Howard talked to Tommy Lee in regards to the residence video he lately watched. Howard used to be amazed by way of the stolen tape of Tommy Lee and his spouse Pamela Lee. The tape was stolen from Pam and Tommy's residence not too lengthy in the past and now it can be made it's means on to the net. The tape was once house video shot by way of Tommy and Pam even as doing matters collectively together with having intercourse. Tommy has a colossal penis and Howard may be very impressed with the dimensions of it. At present he referred to as it ''The eighth surprise of the sector''. Howard spent 25 minutes speaking to Tommy in regards to the tape and the way interesting it used to be. Howard thinks that it can be mistaken to steal whatever so individual however he could not stop gazing it. He even told Tommy that he confirmed it to a couple of guys final night. Tommy mentioned that he could not speak much about who stole it or what's being achieved about it however he's obtained some persons working on it. Tommy is out travelling with Motley Crue right now. Pamela might be on the exhibit next week. Mark Harris is available in. 10/24/97. 9:20am The always traumatic Mark Harris and his exboyfriend David from Germany got here on this morning. They have been imagined to perform a few of their horrible song on the show however they misplaced a cassette tape or some crap like that. David is a violinist that Mark had a short relationship with a few months ago. They are now not doing that anymore and David says that he is no longer homosexual and he's not bi-sexual even though he did do matters to Mark when they met. They mentioned that they sleep within the equal mattress even now however they don't do some thing to one another. These two will likely be again on November 11 to perform their horrible song so I will not waste any more area writing about it in these days. -- Thursday October 23, 1997 -Steve Grillo Interviews Alec 1st earl baldwin of bewdley. 10/23/ninety seven. 6:20am Howard played tape of an interview Steve Grillo did with actor Alec Stanley Baldwin. Alec would not answer any of the questions. He just instructed Steve that he would make noises to reply. Grillo requested him things like: should Princess Diana have punched out the paparazzi like you did? How do you restrict your brother Steve? Howard has a difficulty he desires to know how can Howard preclude Steven? Alec simply gave false laughs for solutions until the one about Howard fending off Steven when it appeared like he particularly laughed. I am sorry if the questions aren't to the phrase but I did not get them on tape. I am working off my horrible reminiscence. Creator Dr. David Leiberman On The cell. 10/23/97. 7:15am Dr. David Leiberman, creator of ''instantaneous evaluation'' known as in to speak about his book. The book looks at things like why persons stare at themselves in the reflect, why they arrive early to appointments, why they misplace keys and crap like that. The book looked as if it would focal point on a lot of problems that Howard has. He was interested to listen to why he did some of these things. At one point in the dialog a guy known as in and said that Dr. Leiberman is a fraud. He gave the impression very upset with the Dr. And advised Howard that he stole the ideas for his booklet from his twin brother. Dr. Leiberman denied all the guys claims though. The ebook is available in bookstores everywhere. Man Who Will Kill His Step-Father For A confidential elements package deal. 10/23/ninety seven. 7:45am Some man called in and said that he'd be inclined to kill his Baptist Minister step-father for a private components Prize package. He stated that his step-father has been getting his church to signal a petition to get Howard thrown off the air. He's no longer too completely happy with that so he stated he'd bump him off if Howard would give


him a personal parts Prize bundle. Howard doesn't condone violence so he talked the man out of doing it but gave him one other notion. He informed him to only make a idiot out of the guy in front of his church. The guy on the phone mentioned that his step-father beats him also. Howard advised him to tell the individuals of the church that little fact to make a fool out of him. Perhaps he'll turn out to be killing him anyway. Sternac The inconceivable. 10/23/ninety seven. 8:10am Howard did his pleasant Johnny Carson impression with the aid of doing Sternac The improbable this morning. Al Rosenberg got here in to play the part of Ed McMahon. Sternac offers the reply first then opens an envelope to disclose the question. Right here they are: Potholes - What was Howard Sterns pet name for ladies he banged in school by getting them excessive? A pound of flesh - What did they in finding in Marv Albert's tooth? Other halves, other halves and wives - provide three reasons the howard stern exhibit goes to scores. Make room for daddy - What did certainly one of Robin Quivers thighs say to the opposite? World broad internet - What would a spider have to make to quilt Oprah's ass? Denver, Colorado - identify an unmissed people singer and an unimportant state. KKK Mart - the place will Stuttering John work after Howard Stern fires him? Meals on wheels - What do cannibals call christopher reeve? Handed the buck - What did Rosie O'Donnell do an hour after consuming a whole deer? Seven Days In Tibet - What would appear shorter than a 5 minute discussion with Fred Norris? Superstar Interviews From California. 10/23/97. 8:45am Some man out in California by the identify of Gary went out and received a couple of interviews for Howard. He interviewed bill Mahr, Damon Wayans and Brian of the Mark and Brian radio exhibit. This is what he requested invoice Mahr: How are your ratings? - ''high-quality'' have you ever ever dated a prostitute? - ''according to The megastar'' had been you in an auto accident? - ''No'' Who hit you with an ugly stick? - ''No answer'' Ouch! That last one damage. Subsequent up was once Damon Wayans: Do you sleep with white women? - ''No'' Would you rather be homosexual or sleep with Whoopi Goldberg? - ''..What are you doing tonight?'' he stated to Gary What do you think of Howard Stern? - ''he is an unpleasant asshole who's funny at being an asshole.'' The final interview was with Brian from the Mark and Brian exhibit which used to compete with Howard in the l. A. Rankings. They're relatively no longer competition anymore. Gary asked one query: ''Who's the pitcher and who's the catcher?'' but Brian did not want to answer. He has an awfully feminine voice. He mentioned ''..Leave me alone..'' when Gary saved after him. Howard goofed on his voice for a little bit bit. Goofing On Jenny McCarthy. 10/23/ninety seven. 9:00am Jenny McCarthy is coming in the next day to come but Howard has been goofing on her for quite some time. Jenny is a fairly excellent looking blonde who was once in Playboy and co-hosted MTV's ''Singled Out'' for a few seasons. Now she has a exhibit on NBC. Howard pulled some audio clips from her Playboy video to play this week. In these days he played some and ended up goofing on her dopey solutions. It still stays to be seen whether she'll show up the next day to come. -- Wednesday October 22, 1997 (As replayed on master Tape Theatre - Sunday, January eleven, 2009 and Sunday, December 27, 2009)-- master Tape Theatre - October 22, 1997. 01/eleven/09. 3:00 pm modern-day grasp Tape Theatre replay was from October 22, 1997. This starts offevolved a new season of MTT, i am Michael i'm going to be overlaying it for you as soon as again this 12 months. This show used to be no longer totally blanketed in Mark's archives, so I did a full write up. (Mark's usual write up is below this one.) exhibit opening bits include Sugar Ray's cover of Psychedelic Bee, and a Letterman intro from Howard's look simply after personal components was released. Howard's bloodless, Canadian govt Upset, World series Discussions. 10/22/97. 3:00 pm Howard began off the exhibit complaining in regards to the cold, he mentioned that Sam Kinison would be calling in ''live from hell'', Gilbert Gottfried would be in, and likewise breast tests would take place. Howard mentioned he had plenty of bits in these days and that he desired to get to them swiftly. He mentioned he had various stuff lying around. Robin mentioned that she used to be staring at baseball late into the night final night. Howard used to be amazed at her lack of sleep. Howard needed to go to interrupt after that. Howard then played the bumper with a bunch of gospel singers singing about him. Howard acquired to Greg on the cellphone. Greg said that on Canada there's fundamental dialogue occurring about pulling the stern exhibit off the air. Howard was having problems with the equipment in the studio. Howard said the CRTC (Canadian FCC) was once angry with him for saying he would not like ''French stuff.'' He stated there is already indication they are the quantity 1 show in Canada. He said an article from Canada lists him as getting the easiest criticism rely in history. The article went on to say that the Canadian govt is looking like it'll now not control the Howard Stern exhibit. Howard then performed a track parody of Randy Newman's brief folks making fun of French humans. He stated it wasn't very humorous, but it simply goes to exhibit you ways much time some people have on their arms. The music wasn't very funny, however Jackie was once having a first-class time within the back. Howard moved on to speakme in regards to the World sequence and the way the rankings are low. He mentioned that he's concerned with it and he's no longer quite a gigantic baseball guy. Gary stated he was once up late looking at it and it was once simplest at the 4th inning by means of 10:30 EST. They discussed the outcome of the sport for a few minutes, Florida ended up profitable the sport the prior night. Gary persisted to vent about how late the games go. Howard talked about how there is nothing worth staying up late for and that it's much better to just get some sleep. Callers want group intercourse. 10/22/ninety seven. 3:20 pm Howard moved on to the telephones, there was a lady on who wants staff sex with a couple of girls and a couple of guys. The woman went on describing herself after which her buddy got on the cell to describe herself. Howard requested who they appeared like but they wouldn't say. Howard requested them to kiss every other. He mentioned that he'd orgy with them but they said they desired Fred. Howard observed it tough to feel they can't find guys if they are as excellent watching as they say. A guy called in and claimed he wanted to orgy with them. The women gave the impression , and then the man furnished to carry his buddy. The lady on the telephone said no guys she is aware of want to social gathering with each and every different. Howard said they will have to invite guys over to look at the sport after which start the orgy. Howard asked if they appeared like Laverne and Shirley, however they claimed that one gave the impression of Jodie Foster. Howard requested them to kiss each and every different proper then and there. Then he requested them what they had been carrying. The ladies claimed to kiss however Howard failed to purchase it and had them go for extra. He satisfied them to take a look at it. The ladies then requested about sex toys to make use of on guys and


Howard advised them to check out a butt plug. He hung up with them a short while later. Howard then went on to inform a narrative a few woman he used to have intercourse with 5 instances a day that mentioned she was an actress. Howard stated they did the whole lot to each other, even having intercourse in the bath. He stated one day this different woman came visiting that he had had intercourse with months prior to the 5 occasions a day girl and a whole bunch of individuals had been in the residence. Persons started making out and Howard's female friend took her prime off and an orgy close to ensued, however Howard did not want that in any respect so he said ''overlook it.'' Howard said in a while he found out this girl was once relationship a guy with a massive penis and he or she will not speak to him anymore. Howard needed to go to interrupt rapidly after that. Naked snap shots of Celebrities, Debbie Gibson Refuses To perform Howard's Songs. 10/22/97. Three:50 pm Howard said he likes high Society magazine on the grounds that they have got balls printing bare photos of celebrities like Pam Anderson, Elle McPhereson, Liz Hurley, Cindy Crawford, and Sharon Stone. Howard mentioned they may be relatively, relatively brave for printing upskirt snap shots of the late Princess Diana.(She had only been lifeless about 2 weeks at the time of this show). Jackie could barely breathe he used to be having fun with the pics so much. Howard said they've satisfactory photos of Farrah Fawcett. Howard said that they had been supposed to have Debbie Gibson on, he wrote some songs for her to sing seeing that she desires to vary her photograph. Howard said he wrote one known as ''Hail To satan''. Debbie refused to do the songs. Howard mentioned she desired to participate in her possess ''wild track'' nevertheless it was once horribly non-wild. Howard mentioned he sent her his own wil. How To Increase Your Penile Length For Free Line tune for her to sing. It was once a parody of Elton John's 'Candle within the Wind' about using a candle to pleasure yourself. He performed the music and it acquired tremendous laughs. Howard couldn't consider she failed to want to do the song. Howard then started speaking about how folks are cruelly clubbing seals in Canada again. Howard said any guy who could club a pup is a ''actual man.'' Howard used to be laughing about Asians who use seal penis as an aphrodisiac. Howard performs With the brand new Rosie O'Donnell Doll, Takes Some Calls. 10/22/ninety seven. Four:00 pm Howard had the new Rosie O'Donnell doll and he used to be taking part in clips from it and laughing at them. It had phrases equivalent to ''aid, my fats ass is stuck in the toilet,'' and ''If i don't get Bacon i'm going to kill anybody.'' each person had a good time with that. Howard said they had breast tests developing. Howard received again to speaking concerning the seals for a bit of bit. There was a caller who desired to speak about an advertiser who was freely giving breast implants or anything. Neither Howard nor the girl knew exactly what it was. Howard played a clip of a man talking about breast enhancement and enlargement. Some man was once on the cell acting like he knew where Howard lived and announcing that courtesy flushing was bad for you. The man mentioned that he knows Howard lives next door to a ''junkyard king.'' Howard stated the guy didn't know what he used to be speaking about and hung up on him. An additional guy on the cell mentioned that his penis is smaller than Howard's. Howard mentioned he'll beat him and he is sure of it. Yet another caller stated that the French Canadians are nuts. Howard stated he had a lot to talk about together with these black talk suggests on at night time now. Howard puzzled where he could find some seal penis. He said they employed Sinbad to take over this Vibe show. Robin stated Sinbad lied to them when he was on, telling them he'd not ever do a talk show. Howard mentioned he is a funny man and at the least he can do a monologue. Robin said Vibe is unattainable to look at. Howard went to break after that. Breast Examinations. 10/22/ninety seven. 4:25 pm They got here back from break and had the women there for the breast checks come in. One woman mentioned she is an ''H cup''. She mentioned she has to put on two bras when she does aerobics. She defined the process, she puts on a smaller bra and then a larger one on high of it. She mentioned they are completely common. Howard said she's not a heavy girl but she could be mistaken for one. Howard went to the opposite girl and she or he stated she's an ''E''. Howard couldn't make a decision who to evaluate first. Howard went to the H cup girl first. Jackie stated they are greater than footballs. Howard had Gary come over to support him compare. Howard and Gary persisted to therapeutic massage after which ultimately moved on to the following lady. Howard desired Robin to come back over and feel the breasts but she wasn't . The primary woman said lets her husband have intercourse with a further lady and told her story. She stated she's been wither her husband 7 years and has children with him. She stated she's high-quality with letting him have sex with one more lady as long as he has intercourse along with her first. She stated it used to be a hygiene quandary. Sam Kinison Calls In From Hell. 10/22/97. Four:50 pm They came again from smash with a clip of crazy Alice combating with a man or woman on the cell. Howard had ''Sam Kinison'' on the telephone. The role of Kinison used to be performed by Craig Gass. He talked to the Kinison impressionist for a little bit and made some jokes about just lately dead individuals like Versace and Princess Di. The decision did not final very lengthy. Howard began discussing Ann Rice's idea about how only a few souls ever get to heaven, and that satan created hell as a situation for souls to go. She claims that hell is only a situation of lost souls and now not rather fireplace and brimstone. More than a few news reports and Callers. 10/22/ninety seven. 5:00 pm Howard mentioned just a few reviews at the top of the news together with the tribute to Princess Diana with Peter Gabriel. He stated they must be having a tribute for Peter instead. Howard pulled the string on the Rosie doll a number of extra times. Then he had a lady on the mobilephone who desired to check out lesbianism for her husband. She wanted recommendation on luring women. Howard advised her to move to a strip membership with her husband and choose out a stripper. The girl failed to seem captivated with that suggestion. One guy was on the mobile and he stated he and his pal caught chlymidia from two chicks after pretending to be the Jesus Twins at a local bar. The next caller had her radio up. Howard stored telling her to turn her radio all of the means up. She had it on in the history when he picked up on her. Howard was once particularly having fun with messing with her. She saved turning it up like a dope. She mentioned she had an affair and wants to understand if she's going to hell. Howard just about bought her to confess that the guy she cheated on her husband with was once higher than her husband. Howard talked together with her a little at the same time about having affairs. A guy referred to as in and mentioned he used to be black, Howard goofed on him for a couple of minutes earlier than pronouncing they had to go to interrupt. Howard took just a few extra calls first though, a girl asking about Tom.


Howard made enjoyable of Tom pronouncing he wasn't that vibrant, and some woman stated maybe Tom was having sex together with his golf clubs. The last caller tried to do a funny story but failed. Howard went to break after that. Playboy Video Clips. 10/22/ninety seven. 5:20 pm once they got here again from destroy, Howard performed a clip of a Playboy video. He said that it used to be awful pornography and it turned him off. He stated they have got them doing all kinds of stuff like taking pictures bullseye's whilst riding horses. It's not very porn-like. The following clip had a lady giving her sob story about how difficult her dad and mom labored and her entire life, in the subsequent scene she was once dancing round nude. Howard and Jackie goofed on her for a couple of minutes. The subsequent girl used to be speakme with a Chicago accent and Fred played the ''SHUT UP!'' sound outcomes over her. Gilbert Gottfried comes in. 10/22/97. 5:25 pm Howard said he had Gilbert coming in. Robin stated she noticed him at a free film top of the line. Howard said that there was no label on Gilbert's water due to the fact E! Wanted to believe like an actual network. Gary mentioned that Gilbert ripped it off. Gilbert stated he was opting for at it. Robin mentioned it used to be awkward seeing Gilbert out in public. She mentioned they have been a row far from each other. Howard mentioned his worst nightmare is trying to loosen up after which seeing Gilbert. Gilbert stated Robin was staring at the reveal the entire time, even half an hour earlier than the movie started. The lights have been up and he or she was ignoring him. Howard mentioned Gilbert goes to the entire parties without cost meals. Howard mentioned that Gilbert indicates up 2 hours early for the free food and a chance to meet women. Howard mentioned Gilbert's plate is always loaded, he goes again a few times and brings a domestic dog bag. Jackie mentioned Gilbert was once on a television show with him known as ''The Watcher'' that was an actual bomb. They let the actors go to the front of the line to get steaks. Gilbert and Jackie got to reduce to the entrance and there were dozens of individuals out there waiting, and Gilbert received two, slowing down the process much more. He said he ended up not even eating the second. Howard had a girl on the cellphone who stated she met Gilbert in a restaurant and he tried to choose her up. She stated Gilbert's older than her and agreed he is not hot. Gilbert said he appears like Goldfinger alternatively of Sean Connery. They stated Gilbert is 150% Jewish. The woman on the telephone mentioned he offered her free tickets to his concert for her number. She gave him her number and he called asking if she desired to satisfy him. She lied and informed him she used to be on the opposite line and asked if she might have his number. He stated he'd name her back and Gilbert failed to discontinue. She needed to have her roommate answer and lie for her. Then her brother called her doing a Gilbert impression. She said that Melrose Larry inexperienced and Ratso Sloman wouldn't stop calling her either. Howard stated that Melrose and Larry speak to each other and Melrose has money. So Melrose takes Larry to dinner and Larry tells Gilbert there's free dinner. The 2 of them hook up and take Melrose's dinner. Gange and Gary got here in to become a member of in on the fun, bashing Gilbert some more. Some girl supplied to take Gilbert out to lunch and he called her again continually asking her when it might be for the reason that he wanted sex. That girl that says she's Gilbert's daughter referred to as in. She wasn't making feel and she was hard to hear. Gilbert said the girl's been calling his agent, the television indicates, the papers. Next on the mobilephone was the Holocaust lady once more. She's nonetheless upset with Gilbert for making fun of the Holocaust. She made fun of him and attacked him. She told him she needs he'd commit suicide. Gilbert stored going with the Holocaust jokes and the lady bought upset. She stated that God is punishing Gilbert since he gets no work. They endured to fight for a few minutes. She mentioned given the option between Gilbert and a Nazi she'd pick a Nazi. Gilbert asked her if she'd as a substitute sleep with him or power with Princess Di. She wasn't gonna reply that although. The girl stated she talked to Henry Winkler about her mum and dad. Gilbert asked if he gave her the thumbs up and said,''Eeeeeh!'' Gilbert asked if she informed it to Laverne and Shirley too. Gilbert advised her to yell,''HOGAAAAAAN!'' he kept making Holocaust jokes and obtained the girl indignant. That continued for about 15 minutes after which she hung up. It did not end there though. The next guy on the cellphone mentioned Gilbert tried to choose up his spouse. An additional guy referred to as in and said Gilbert tried to bang his mother in high school. That man grew to become out to be a fake. The final guy stated Gilbert picked up his own tip. That one that they had the hardest time believing. Grillo got here in and said his pal dated Gilbert for a whilst and Gilbert said she was fairly scorching, nevertheless it used to be a flip off that she'd banged Grillo. Extra With Gilbert and Ratso. 10/22/97. 6:20 pm Larry Ratso Sloman was once on the cell. Howard said that Larry purchased a residence for a lot of money even though it wasn't a valuable condo. Gilbert said that he used to be at a get together with Ratso. There was once a bit girl with out enamel consuming closely. Gilbert was once screaming on the party. Larry said he's under no circumstances noticeable Gilbert buy a beer having said that he tried a prank on him. He told him he had no money for the cab after they bought out and Gilbert grew to become white. Then he took out crumpled up greenback costs from his pocket. There was once a guy on the telephone that mentioned he was once survive the scene of a shoot out with police, it turns out he wasn't though. Robin's news With Gilbert. 10/22/ninety seven. 6:35 pm Robin began off her information, Gilbert was once nonetheless goofing round about Ratso. Her first story was once about incestuous siblings that misplaced custody of their youngster. The following story used to be concerning the World series. Howard asked Gilbert if he watches baseball. He said ''no.'' He couldn't even identify a participant or how many guys are on a team. Gilbert used to be making enjoyable of himself for a couple of minutes then he went into ''Who's On First''. Robin stated she'd like to get out of their someday today, but Gilbert used to be going to make certain that did not occur. Robin tried to continue her news however Gilbert kept making enjoyable of Ratso. Gilbert was having fun with himself. Robin's subsequent story used to be about a girl dropping custody of her kids due to the fact she's hooked on the web. Court files say she spends all her time locked in a room with a computer, faraway from her children. The children will accept to the father. Howard mentioned there are men and women within the chat rooms all day and night. Robin tried to continue with the news as soon as again, and Gilbert obtained into his impressions. He did Dracula Gottfried and had all people cracking up in the studio. Robin's next story was once about two women who wrote a song about homosexuality referred to as, ''not normal''. Robin stated they are going to sing it in Philly at the ''Million woman March''. Then she had a story about Stevie wonder singing at the funeral of his favorite driver. Gilbert did Dracula Gottfried for a few


minutes making enjoyable of that. The subsequent story was once about Dennis Rodman requesting more money from the Chicago Bulls. Howard requested Gilbert if he's ever accomplished Vibe with Keenan Ivory Wayans. He mentioned it's the one black show he hasn't accomplished. Gilbert began doing his Carson affect and making enjoyable of Keenan. Her final studies were about bill Cosby getting a brand new exhibit on CBS. Gilbert did his bill Cosby impact for a couple of minutes. The next was about Johnny Rotten winning his court docket case. The very final used to be about Roman Polanski trying to get back within the country. They finished up a short while later. -- Wednesday October 22, 1997 (Mark's long-established write up) -- Two Breast melanoma Examinations. 10/22/97. 7:50am Howard bought to place his palms on 4 more breasts today. Two females showed up in these days to have Howard supply them breast melanoma exams. One lady used to be four'eight'' tall with H-Cup breasts! The opposite used to be 5'10'' with E-Cup's! Howard had greater than a handful in these days. Everyone within the studio used to be amazed by means of the H-cups. Sarah, the H-cup, stated that her breasts are average, no longer implants like the other girl's. Kim, the E-cup, used to have C-cups unless she obtained implants to blow them up to E. Kim is a stripper. Sarah used to be first as much as have her breasts examined. Howard said ''they're fantastic!'' when she took off her shirt. Jackie used to be amazed simply through the size of her bra. It was enormous. They mentioned it looked like two football helmets. Howard used to be having a hell of a time analyzing Sarah so Gary acquired in on the enjoyable. Sarah said that she failed to intellect having Gary help. Howard kept finding lumps in her breasts however there may be a lot there that it typically wasn't cancer. Kim used to be up next and Howard stated she had relatively exceptional implants. He needed to provide her a special exam since she has implants. Kim advised him that he needed to style of ''pop up'' her implant to be in a position to suppose around the entire breast. After examining Kim Howard requested Robin to return over and feel the breasts. Robin refused to do it. Sam Kinison Calls In From Hell. 10/22/ninety seven. 8:30am each as soon as in a whilst a cell line falls on the grave of the late comic Sam Kinison so he is ready to call the exhibit. If you do not consider that then a comic who does an potent affect of Sam calls in as Sam Kinison From Hell. Sam referred to as in and talked just a little bit about woman Di and Gianni Versace being down there in Hell. He mentioned that after Versace arrived in hell the one thing he stated used to be ''appear what this man did to my swimsuit!''. Sam didn't want to talk an excessive amount of in regards to the demise of girl Diana however he did said that Dodi Fayed has cheated on Diana with three of Sam's ex-girlfriends. He also said that there's one good factor to return out of the death of woman Di. He stated that he has ''. One kick ass limo driver..''. Sam's connection used to be misplaced quickly after that. The voice of Sam Kinison from Hell is performed by means of comedian Craig Gass from Seattle. Gilbert Gottfried comes in. 10/22/ninety seven. 9:20am comedian Gilbert Gottfried came in to hang out throughout the news. As natural when Gilbert is available in there have been tons of bad mobile calls coming in. Howard ought to have taken 8 or 10 calls from persons who've either dated Gilbert or have seen him doing something strange. One girl who called in the last time Gilbert was on known as in once more at present. She was on the phone yelling at Gilbert for roughly 25 minutes or so. Gilbert had made some jokes concerning the holocaust when she drove him to some occasion. She simply finds him horrible and unfunny so Howard let her vent on him in these days. Gilbert just maintains making enjoyable and laughing through the whole thing. Another lady who called within the last time Gilbert was once on referred to as in at present. She claims to be Gilbert's daughter. She's 30 years ancient and Gilbert is in his mid forty's or so. He would had been about 15 or so when she used to be born but she stated that he's the daddy. She even mentioned that she lived with him when she was 7 years ancient. Gilbert stated that she's been calling his agent and even the United States community where he works. She's like a stalker or some thing. Gilbert is nice when he is available in. He maintains every person laughing by means of the entire news section. He simply makes silly feedback and does his Dracula affect. He didn't disappoint in these days. It was steady laughs in the course of the whole information section. -- Tuesday October 21, 1997 -- 15 yr ancient Caller Who Can Fart by means of Pounding His Ass. 10/21/97. 6:35am A 15 12 months historical kid known as in and said that he could fart by pounding on his butt. He demonstrated his skill on the phone for Howard and it worked. Stuttering John mentioned that the child advised him that he can prefer up women with this extraordinary talent. Howard stated that he desires that he might fart on command so he desired to try out the process. What the kid is honestly doing is pounding air into his butt with his hand. He will get down on his knees and elbows and pounds the air in. Howard gave it a are attempting but wasn't successful. He tried it a few times however it simply didn't work for him. Howard desires the child to return all the way down to the studio however he lives in Michigan. Listening to Howard making an attempt this used to be quite humorous. Optimistically it is going to make it to E!. Katarina The Swedish Broadcaster. 10/21/97. 8:00am 28 yr ancient Katarina, a Swedish broadcaster, came in to meet Howard this morning. She's within the States on vacation and she or he heard about Howard's film so she got here in. She used to be relatively excellent looking according to Howard. Howard made up our minds to have a little enjoyable with her so he introduced in Steve the Engineer (a.K.A. ''timber Yi'') to play the role of Michael Jordan of CBS broadcasting. ''timber Yi'' performed the part well. Jackie have to were feeding him his strains whilst he was standing there since he certain as hell wasn't rehearsed. He would ask Katarina to do matters like take a seat on his hand or tell her to ''F-Off''. It was once very unique. Salt & Pepa come in. 10/21/ninety seven. Eight:35am female rappers Salt & Pepa got here in to plug their new album ''brand New''. Their DJ Spindarella used to be additionally there. Howard has had a fascination with Pepa for quite a while now. He is frequently stated that he'd prefer to ''bang'' her after seeing her in a few of their videos. It seems that Salt has grow to be a very religious man or woman and she'd wish to start doing ''inspirational'' files alternatively of rap documents. I'm sorry, she says that she's now not religious but she has ''..A individual relationship with God..''. Spindarella mentioned that after she retires she's going to grow to be a Masseuse. Howard could not consider what he was once hearing. He used to be questioning why a just right watching, famous rapper would want to go right into a job like that. She simply enjoys doing it so she'll make it her profession. Howard performed a couple of seconds of their new single ''Are You ready'' and took a few mobilephone calls before ending the interview. Salt's sister known as her on her cell telephone to tell her to relax just earlier than they left. It used to be just a little


too late however as a minimum she tried. Other Happenings On The show. (Contributed through Don From Michigan) 10/21/ninety seven. 9:30am Fred Norris needed to leave the exhibit early for some filming of the film "LuLu (no longer sure of spelling) On The Bridge" where he is appearing. Howard then went on to take mobilephone calls from listeners. Subject matters mentioned incorporated: Howard's frustration with some interpretations of Canada's Hate Speech legal guidelines. The irony of KEGL-FM "The Eagle" in Dallas being sold by means of Nationwide coverage after canceling his exhibit for the period of the quick interval wherein they owned it. Howard's plans to sue for racketeering the character whose name seems on the letter being circulated by the American household organization. He objects to their letters to consumers of his radio affiliates encouraging them to withhold their promoting business. Maria Returns. 10/20/ninety seven. 7:05am The nutty lady who called in throughout the information last Friday was on the mobile once more in these days. She was just as wacky as final week. She nonetheless thinks that Robert Redford and Robert Urich are out to kill her. This time her husband was once home so Howard acquired the chance to speak to him. However before that Howard had Fred name in as Robert Redford to check out and straighten the woman out. No luck there. The husband mentioned her slightly bit. He revealed that they've four daughters and that they have been married for 35 years. He said that the dilutions started about 29 years ago! He nonetheless sticks with her although. He stated that she used to be pretty just right watching after they bought married they usually've each been faithful to each other so he sticks with her. Howard invited her to come down to the station so we should be hearing from her in the close future. Howard advised Maria that they'd have Robert Redford down to satisfy her.. He later mentioned that maybe they'd put a paper bag over Fred's head and contact him Robert Redford. David Lee Roth is available in. 10/20/97. 7:35am Former Van Halen lead singer David Lee Roth came in to plug his new book ''crazy From The warmth'' today. He and Howard talked about a bunch of one of a kind subjects from the publication. Listed below are a few examples:Dave as soon as had 5 women in a room having intercourse, Dave came up with the title for the band, he used to get on his hands and knees to wash the stage, he hasn't slept with plenty of famous persons, he used to pay his roadies to select out just right looking females for him to satisfy, his music ''similar to Paradise'' was once nearly the theme tune for ''Beverly Hills 90210''. Howard also took some phone calls for Dave. One guy asked Dave if he'd work with the Van Halen boys again sooner or later. He mentioned that he would but it will be below extra controlled conditions. Dave additionally has a finest hits album out with a new single known as ''do not Piss Me Off''. The Billboard Awards Nightmare. 10/20/ninety seven. Eight:40am Howard was once nominated for some Billboard Award for high-quality syndicated speak exhibit host or something like that. He received an invite but did not wish to go. The plan was to send Hank the under the influence of alcohol dwarf all the way down to take delivery of simply in case Howard gained. Good it didn't happen that method. Mike Gange and Doug from E! Went down to Orlando Florida to film the awards. Hank was once supposed to fly down Friday night from Boston. Hank showed up on the airport so inebriated that they would not let him on the airplane. Then he misplaced his ticket so Gange had to purchase him one more. To make a protracted story a little shorter, Hank under no circumstances made it right down to Orlando. Gange and Doug had to discover a replacement. They located a Hawaiian Tropic model who would go up and show her breasts in entrance of the crowd if Howard had been to win. They had a pleasant speech for her to learn. Well Howard received the award so Cheryl the mannequin went as much as get the award however she failed to learn her speech. She simply mentioned whatever like ''Howard rules'' and ran off. The some huge fats guy acquired up on stage in his undies and started yelling all kinds of crap. Howard would barely hear what was on the tape since of some difficulty with the tape player at present. He had both Hank and Cheryl on the mobilephone in the course of most of this. After the huge fats guy began his yelling crap Cheryl made her way back to the stage and skim her speech and confirmed her breasts. It was once all one giant mess. Discussion About Breeding Animals. 10/20/ninety seven. 9:45am it all started with one mobile call. A guy desired to tell Howard about how he had his dog's sperm frozen so he would use it at some point to breed domestic dogs. That wasn't the unusual part though. It was once the way in which that the veterinarian will get the sperm. They ought to ''manipulate'' the dog's wiener and collect sperm identical to a human would do. The fellow said it used to be lovely strange to look it occurring. That phone call ended in others about persons who've accumulated sperm from such animals as pigs, cows, horses and even whales! Every one has one other system for gathering the little fellows. The man with the pig story stated that they insert some type of electrical rod into the pigs ass and shock him into donating his gift. There sure is a few wacky crap happening in the market. Yet another Breast cancer exam. 10/20/ninety seven. 9:55am Howard did a quick breast melanoma examination on a lovable 25 year ancient by using the title of Jackie in these days. He had to make it fast considering that he needed to get to the information. Bad Jackie had been waiting to get on the exhibit on account that 4am! She came down from Buffalo simply to meet Howard and let him touch her breasts. If truth be told she stated she failed to really care concerning the cancer exam, she simply desired him to contact her breasts! It's amazing what reputation can do for a man is not it? Keep in mind that, Howard didn't find any lumps in her breasts. Scott The Engineer Given Proclamation From Councilman. 10/17/97. 7:10am A metropolis councilman from Seven Hills Ohio came in to reward Scott The Engineer with some Proclamation thanking him for making a bet towards Cleveland in the baseball playoffs. Scott misplaced the bet so Cleveland is heading to the arena series. The 24 yr old Councilman, David Bentowsky, provided the article to Scott. Ponce De LaPhone Phony telephone Calls. 10/17/97. 7:15am Howard performed tape of three new phony telephone calls that Ponce made. They had been first-class as typical. Ponce uses tape from the show alternatively of his possess voice. The three that Howard performed included the voices of Hank the drunk dwarf, wood Yi and Kirk Douglas announcing ''What are you announcing?''. Ponce keeps getting better and better. Phone name To Fred's mom About intercourse. 10/17/ninety seven. 7:40am the opposite day Howard spoke to Jackie's mom about oral sex and other stuff. Today it used to be Fred's mother's turn. Howard gave her a name and learned that she is probably the most open mother of all of them. Howard first spoke to Fred's step-father in regards to the area. He let all people comprehend that they'd carried out that stuff and maybe still do. Fred's mother demonstrated it. She stated that they're very joyful. Tori Spelling is available


in. 10/17/97. 7:50am Tori Spelling got here in to plug a movie that she's in referred to as ''The condo Of yes''. It's no longer a tv film this time. It is an actual film that will be released subsequent week across the country. Robin saw it and said it was lovely good. Howard spent most of the interview asking Tori about how her day goes. He asked everything from when she wakes up unless she goes out after work. He also took some mobile calls from nutty listeners. One man known as in and said that he'd skateboard naked around the block just to fulfill Tori. Howard informed him to come back down but he on no account did make it. A couple of different callers introduced out the fact that Tori brought her brother to a strip membership for his birthday and had a lap dance for herself! Her brother is below age so she failed to wish to talk about it too much considering she used to be afraid that her mum and dad would discover about it. Howard stated that he used to be hypnotized via Tori's breasts the entire time she used to be there. The Mike Walker sport. 10/17/97. 8:50am No superstar contestants at present with the Mike Walker recreation. It was once most effective Howard, Robin and Jackie playing. Fred used to be a contributor for the sport so he sat out. Listed here are this week's 4 stories: Farrah Fawcett demanded that she get to hold some place of business furnishings that was once used for whatever thing she was worried with. The furniture was once hooked up to the wall so she demanded that or not it's ripped out. They did emerge as purchasing her a new wall unit. Maria Schriver freaked out recently when she observed long hairs in her brush. It grew to become out to be doll hair. Her daughter had brushed her dolls hair with the comb. When a ladies room door was once locked in a California restaurant for an improved period of time the supervisor demanded for the individual to come out. When the door opened it used to be Jim Belushi with a newspaper and cigar in hand. He said the guys's room was once busy. The contributors of Fleetwood Mac have already started combating again and have said that there'll not ever be one other reunion once more. Jackie selected story three because the false, Howard selected number 2 however converted his option to quantity 1 and Robin picked quantity three because the fake. The specific false story was once quantity four. Animated Marv Albert song. 10/17/ninety seven. 9:20am anybody sent Howard some type of computer animation of Marv Albert that goes along with the Marv Albert song parody ''the day before today'' that that they had on the exhibit no longer too long in the past. He performed it for Robin and mentioned that he'd wish to get it on E!. Howard mentioned that it was once best. Richard Belzer Sits In throughout The information. 10/17/ninety seven. 9:25am comedian Richard Belzer came in to hang out during the information. His exhibit ''murder'' has it's season best tonight. Earlier than they did the information though a lady known as in who claimed that she was afraid that she's going to be murdered. When Howard began asking the lady who was once going to kill her she mentioned that Robert Redford and Robert Urich have been out to get her for some odd motive. Howard played along with her for relatively a even as. It used to be genuinely sort of unhappy on the grounds that this girl was once entirely screwed up. Howard tried to get in contact with the girl's daughter and her husband but they did not have any success. -- Thursday October sixteen, 1997 -- Howard Talks in regards to the Tommy & Pamela Lee Video. 10/sixteen/97. 6:30am Howard obtained a videotape in the mail of Tommy Lee and his wife Pamela Lee having sex and doing a bunch of alternative matters. Howard stated it was the sexiest factor he is seen. It appears the tape was house video that Pam and Tommy made collectively nevertheless it was stolen and circulated far and wide the position. Howard spent really a bit of time talking about bits and portions of the tape. He made it sound like the tape was once 2 hours lengthy however because it seems it can be most effective like half-hour. Later in the morning Howard discovered that the tape is on hand on the internet for like $40 or $50. He wouldn't supply out the URL on account that he would not think it's correct to promote that sort of stuff without their permission. Woman comes in To consume Cake Out Of Fred's Ass. 10/sixteen/ninety seven. 7:25am This lady had called within the other day about eating cake out of Jackie's ass for a personal materials Prize bundle. Jackie failed to wish to do it so Fred was once subsequent on the list. Her title used to be Linda and she's 36 years ancient. Howard mentioned she appears forty six. She came in this morning and it turns out that she appears form of like Jackie! Howard stated she had relatively fine breasts although. Earlier than she ate the cake she desired Howard to offer her a breast examination however he turned her down. She looked as if it would scare every person in the studio. When she subsequently did consume the cake out of his ass every person within the room was once going nuts. Howard later stated that she used to be looking to pull Fred's pants down even as eating the cake. It must had been a hell of a website online. Fred has a first-class ass in line with Howard incidentally. Lynyrd Skynryd Drummer Tells Story Of Survival. 10/16/97. 8:25am This guy Artimus Pyle used to be one of the vital survivors of the aircraft crash that killed one of the crucial participants of the band Lynyrd Skynrd. He advised the story about how the airplane ran out of gas in an effort to Baton Rouge, Louisiana and the way they crashed into a swamp. He managed to crawl out of the wreckage and located a residence. As he obtained to the house although the owner inspiration the man was once a thief or anything and shot him! It wasn't bad adequate that he'd just been in a airplane crash, some dumb ass shoots him. 6 of the 26 on board died. Two of them had been the pilot and co-pilot. The fellow was beautiful cool for coming on and telling the story. Later within the exhibit a guy called in and mentioned that Artimus had been thrown in penitentiary for raping a 4 year old or some thing like that. Howard had Gary get Artimus again on the mobilephone to find out what it was once all about. Artimus explained that all of it needed to do with custody of his child. He stated it had whatever to do along with his girlfriend getting out of the connection and utilizing a little one molestation story to do it. He did not provide all of the small print so it was once variety of hard to determine it out. This guy has been by means of a hell of various crap in his life huh? Howard offers Breast melanoma examination To Black girl. 10/sixteen/97. 9:10am This used to be the first black lady to come in for a breast cancer examination from Howard. She had small breasts however Howard nonetheless seemed to enjoy the examination. He mentioned that she gave the impression of any one out of country wide Geographic magazine. She had some variety of marks on her breasts that she was worried about. Howard said they appeared like cigarette burns or zits on her one breast. He instructed her to have them checked through a doctor. But another triumphant breast examination with the aid of Dr. Stern. Daniel Carver's movie overview Of ''Booty call''. 10/sixteen/97. 9:15am KKK member Daniel Carver used to be on the mobile to present his assessment of the film ''Booty call'' He gave it 2


nooses out of 5. He mentioned that it used to be humorous but it surely was once all black propaganda. He mentioned he'd instead see a Steve Martin film or something like that. -- Wednesday October 15, 1997 -- Steve Grillo Interviews Jonathan Harris. 10/15/97. 6:45am Howard performed tape of an interview Steve Grillo did with Jonathan Harris. He is the man who performed Dr. Smith within the historical television sequence ''lost In area''. The nice doctor played together with the few questions that Grillo requested. Earlier than enjoying the tape though, Howard used to be speaking about how dumb Grillo is in view that he dropped out of tuition after going for 6 years. He only had a further semester to finish however he dropped out in view that he needed to take 2 semesters of a overseas language. Howard offers Breast cancer examination. 10/15/ninety seven. 7:30am In awareness of breast melanoma attention month Howard has determined to offer free checks to any women who want them. The first girl to exhibit up was once Patricia or Trish as she referred to as herself. She's a good looking stripper who didn't hesitate to take off her prime to have Howard do the exam. Trish has breast implants so it was just a little more complicated to do the exam. Howard was explaining what he was once doing so females at house would examine themselves for cancer. Howard stored saying that this wasn't erotic for him however I suppose we all know that's false. He essentially felt this lady up and admitted it. He certain does not get to believe up strangers breasts another means besides when he does the portray O' the golf green for St. Patricks Day or when he paints breasts like Easter eggs for the duration of Easter. Okay, so he does get to believe up women's breasts really a little. Howard stated that Trish used to be excited by all of this. We will must expect that he supposed her nipples have been erect. I think Howard was seeking to play this straight so that they might exhibit this on tv like they do when a real health practitioner is doing it for a news application. Don't rely on it happening although. Howard Talks To Jackie's mother About sex. 10/15/ninety seven. Eight:15am not too long in the past Howard was questioning if Jackie's mother, being the laid back form of person she is, had ever let her husband in the again door in an effort to communicate. He ultimately made the telephone name to her this morning and asked her about it. She said that back in her day they simply didn't do things like that. She even stated that she not ever gave her husband oral intercourse. Howard also spoke to Gary's mom about the identical discipline. Gary's mom mentioned the same factor. She in no way gave her husband oral intercourse. It simply wasn't the correct factor to do. Later within the exhibit a 68 yr historical lady known as in and stated that she thinks women did that stuff again then however they simply don't wish to talk about it. The woman said that she gave her men oral sex but failed to quite talk about it. She wasn't talking for the mothers of Gary and Jackie nevertheless it's viable that they just don't need to speak about it. We may just certainly not understand the reality. David Duchovny comes in. 10/15/ninety seven. 8:40am Actor David Duchovny got here in to plug his new film ''playing God'' at present. David is likely one of the stars of ''The X-records'' on Fox. We discovered that David is an awfully shrewd guy. He graduated from Princeton college and went on to Yale to get his masters. The discipline of the SAT exams came up even before David got here into the studio however they discovered that he acquired a score of 1320 on his 2d are attempting. David said that he suggestion Howard used to be excellent in ''private ingredients''. He proposal Fred was once even better. Howard rather thinks tremendously of David's new wife Tea Leoni. They mentioned her for somewhat at the same time. David mentioned how they received together. They have been introduced by means of their agent. Howard also took some cell calls from some wacky listeners. David put some rumors to rest. One guy thought that the X-documents film was once a rumor but it surely's not only a rumor, they completed filming it this summer season and it is going to be out subsequent June. Simply to place some rumors to leisure David stated that he is not a mattress wetter and he on no account did porno films even though he used to be in some movie the place there was some nudity. David's film opens this Friday. He stated he'd come again when he is doing publicity for the X-documents film subsequent spring. Extra Breast cancer assessments. 10/15/ninety seven. 9:40am Howard did a pair extra breast cancer exams before doing the news today. The primary woman was once a 20 yr historic with braces. She was good watching but she seemed so younger that they had to assess her identification to be certain. Consistent with Howard this woman Jen had the greatest C-cup breasts. He was quite impressed with them. She seemed some thing like Drew Barrymore according to Robin but Howard stated she looked better than that. Howard did the examination on her and mentioned it wasn't erotic.. Certain Howard. Stuttering John came in and told Howard that there was a further girl ready to have her examination completed. Jen left and 23 year old April came in. She had enormous breasts according to Howard. She wasn't even certain what measurement they had been. She mentioned that they had been either a C or a D cup. Howard seemed to have much more enjoyable doing this exam than he did with the other two. Relatively a day for Howard! What number of guys can say they felt up three women in not up to 2 ½ hours? -Tuesday October 14, 1997 -- unusual sex Story Tuesday. 10/14/ninety seven. 7:15am there were a bunch of special sex experiences being instructed by using callers this morning. One 24 yr old guy advised a narrative about dozing along with his 47 year historic Aunt. He said she used to be quite good watching however nonetheless, that's beautiful messed up. An additional man told a story about his sister's pal giving him oral sex whilst his sister was standing there telling her to do it. Then the friend and the sister received into a lesbian factor at the same time the brother watched. Later within the show yet another guy referred to as in together with his story a couple of dominatrix who crapped on him. He mentioned it was some thing he wanted to do. I'm getting nauseous simply writing about it. Howard Jams With Scott The Engineer. 10/14/ninety seven. 7:40am earlier than inexperienced Day got here in to play a couple of songs Howard desired to play with their instruments. He wanted to perform ''Gloria'' together with Scott The Engineer on drums. Howard sang lead and Robin, Jackie and Fred had been backup singers. Of course it did not sound that high-quality and proper after they had been executed enjoying the individuals of inexperienced Day popped their heads in to see if their devices had been k. Howard didn't know that inexperienced Day were there or else he would not have messed with their stuff. Howard talked to them for roughly 10 seconds then took some mobilephone calls. Inexperienced Day wasn't scheduled to participate in unless eight:30. Howard settled on naming the staff ''The Losers'' after throwing out a couple of names. Intellectual wellbeing discussion. 10/14/ninety seven. 8:10am Howard mentioned that he's thinking of going to peer a psychiatrist. This resulted in a dialogue about how


messed up every body on the show is. Fred admitted to going to a psychiatrist for a while. Robin additionally went to one for roughly 2 and a half years. Howard asked Fred if he told the psychiatrist that he wasn't coming back or did he simply stop going. Fred mentioned that he informed him however Howard failed to believe the story. This all ended in Fred getting all wound up and freaking out. Howard said some thing else to Fred to get him quite wound up but the extend was hit for some rationale. Fred did go nuts although. It was very unique to listen to him go off like that. Green Day Performs Two Songs. 10/14/97. Eight:40am Punk rock band green Day came in to perform a few songs for Howard. Howard interviewed them for a little at the same time earlier than they played. They talked in regards to the lead singer's tattoo's and the way they were simply plastered all over the place his arms for no purpose. Howard also recounted seeing the blokes back stage one time. He noticed one in all them spinning round on his back along with his penis putting out even as the others have been strolling around like nuts. Then they ran on stage to begin the show. They didn't appear to know what Howard was once speakme about but it was a heck of a narrative. The band performed their hit music ''Basket Case'' first despite the fact that they deliberate on enjoying their new track first. For some reason Howard wanted them to play the old tune first.. Something. They played ''Hitchin' A experience'' subsequent. That one is off of their new album ''Nimrod'' which was once just released. Girl Who Will Do some thing to fulfill David Duchovny. 10/14/ninety seven. 10:35am Actor David Duchovny from ''The X files'' is scheduled to come in sometime this week. This caused a mobilephone call from a girl listener who mentioned she'd do some thing to satisfy David. Howard got here up with some suggestions for her like pouring honey all over her and letting a canine lick it off. She would comply with one of the vital less difficult matters like letting them call her ''poop head'' or giving Crackhead Bob a massage however when she said that she wouldn't be inclined to crap in a diaper in entrance of Howard he mentioned that was the thing she needed to do. Howard gave her a couple of possibilities to vary her intellect however she refused so rough success for pleasure. Web page Of The Day. 10/thirteen/97. 7:05am Howard was once speakme a couple of web site that he lately noticed which has females who don't shave and who are really furry. He couldn't don't forget the address to start with so he was once attempting a few exclusive ones. Well he stated the right one and it was once overwhelmed with the aid of listeners so Howard could not get into it to show Robin one of the crucial photographs. The deal with was some thing like www.Hairtostay.Com. Good luck getting into the site. Girl To eat Chocolate Cake Out Of Fred's Ass. 10/thirteen/97. 7:30am a girl known as in and volunteered to devour chocolate cake out of Jackie's ass. I suppose she used to be influenced with the aid of last week's consuming of Hershey Kisses out of the JokeMan's ass. Jackie said that he does not want to do it this time.. It is any person else's flip. Next in line for the job used to be Fred. He said he'd do it however the girl on the mobile did not sound too thrilled with it. The lady mentioned she'd be capable to come in subsequent week someday. She described herself to Howard as 5'9'' tall, a hundred thirty-a hundred thirty five pounds with a 36 C chest. She stated she appears type of like a younger Kathleen Turner. Replace: Kim The Nude rubdown girl. 10/thirteen/97. 7:35am Kim used to be the fortunate lady who acquired the nude rubdown from Jenna Jameson final week. She known as on this morning to tell Howard how thrilled she was after having that rubdown. Howard also published that Kim's bra had come off in the course of that massage. I wasn't aware of that last week after I heard the exhibit. Kim also said that Jenna was ''..Rubbing the whole thing..'' throughout the rub down. Kim mentioned that she hasn't been converted to lesbianism however she certain enjoyed the rub down. Author Jean Robinson On The mobile. 10/thirteen/ninety seven. 7:45am This lady wrote a e-book called ''How to outlive in spite of Your family''. It's about racism inside black families and handle it. Howard interviewed the woman for a while in regards to the ebook and took some cellphone calls from black individuals who've had this obstacle. Jean, who's seventy one, informed Howard that her mom handled her poorly simply because she had darker dermis than the relaxation of her loved ones. Her mother once said to anyone, ''..Is not it unsightly..'' like she was a bit of crap or whatever. At one factor within the interview Jean was rambling on in regards to the man who wrote ''effective Grace''. I have no idea what her factor was but she started singing the song. Let's simply say that she should follow writing. In order for you to order the ebook just name: 1-888-231-2509. Jenna Jameson comes in to give Nude Rubdown. 10/10/ninety seven. 7:35am All week long Howard had been opting for contestants for the Jenna Jameson nude rubdown contest. The day gone by they chose a winner by the identify of Dee(Darius). He has testicular and penile melanoma and he usually will not are living greater than a year. Jenna got here on this morning to offer the lucky winner his massage. Howard talked with Jenna for a couple of minutes about her 4 month lengthy marriage and about what she used to be wearing. Jenna plugged some appearances that she'll be making in the close future additionally. Then they moved on to the massage. Dee came in and Gary described him as being a thin heavy metallic fan variety. Or skinny with lengthy hair. Howard mentioned that he wasn't too bad watching. He came in with a towel round his waist for the massage. He was once getting equipped for the rubdown when he told Howard that he had an extra suggestion. As an alternative of him getting the massage he wanted Jenna to give his lady friend Kim the massage. He'd as a substitute see that then have the rubdown himself. Howard didn't intellect considering that he'd rather see that anyway. Dee's girlfriend used to be out within the green room so Gary bought her all set up with a towel and brought her in. I suppose Kim wasn't too dangerous watching from what I might tell. Jenna received naked and started giving Kim the rubdown. First she used to be on her back and he or she was once loving it. Dee was once loving it also. Kim wasn't bare however Jenna certain was. She was once using some kind of oil for the rubdown. Jenna gave the massage for a excellent 15 minutes solid and Kim used to be moaning and breathing heavy the whole time. At one point Kim rolled over on to her again so Jenna might rub down the front. Howard was loving every 2d of this. He was once trying to interview her whilst she used to be having the rub down but she would barely pay attention or answer the questions. As soon as Jenna used to be achieved with the massage Kim was dizzy. Gary mentioned that she stood up and she or he would barely stroll straight. I feel each person preferred this contest. One lady caller said that she used to be loving it also. Bloated lawyer Dominic Barbara referred to as in and offered to present the man and his female friend 2 aircraft tickets to Puerto Rico so they would keep at his condo down there. And all Dee had to do was once get cancer in his penis.. The Mike Walker recreation With Insane


Clown Posse. 10/10/97. 8:45am Insane Clown Posse is a couple of white guys who rap. They were on a number of months ago after they have been dropped from a Disney document enterprise. They had been just as indignant as the final time they had been on. They had been bad mouthing Jenna Jameson because she said that she failed to do not forget them after placing out with them no longer too lengthy in the past. Howard talked with them for a couple of minutes and moved on to the Mike Walker recreation. Here are this week's reviews, try to decide on the false one: Dennis Rodman was once going to be an announcer on the nation tune Awards exhibit however throughout rehearsal he used to be observed to be too wild and used to be dropped from the show. Quentin Tarantino asked John Travolta to do a cameo in a small movie. John mentioned he'd do it if Tarantino would pay for the jet gas for his exclusive aircraft. Tarantino subsequently agreed to pay. Donna D'Erico and Gena Lee Nolan refused to come back out of their trailer for worry that co-megastar Carmen Electra would steal their thunder together with her knockout physique. 5 hours later they got here out. At the same time filming a scene for his tv sequence ''Dellaventura'' Danny Aiello's hair piece fell off so he needed to re-shoot the scene. Insane Clown Posse member Violent Jay picked the primary story as the fake, Shaggy 2 Dope picked 4, Robin picked number 1, Howard picked 3, Jackie picked 4 and Fred wasn't taking part in this week. The genuine false story was once number 2. After the sport the Clowns hung around for a bit whilst. Howard took some telephone calls from pissed off listeners who seemed to hate the Clown Posse. The clowns simply threatened the callers and yelled at them. A couple of fun guys. Danny Aiello Calls Gary About mention In Mike Walker game. 10/10/ninety seven. 10:15am Gary came in to inform Howard that Danny Aiello called him to assert that the story that Mike Walker told about his hair piece falling off was fully false. Danny failed to wish to come on the air however he told Gary that he doesn't wear a hair piece on his ''Dellaventura'' television exhibit however he did wear one in a film one time. Howard got in touch with Mike Walker again and advised Mike about this. Mike claims that he has an excellent source that he bought the story from but he'd determine into it. -- Thursday October 9, 1997 -- an additional Jenna Jameson Contest Entry. 10/9/ninety seven. 6:30am Howard took extra phone calls from listeners with rough luck stories in these days. The grand prize winner will get a nude rubdown from Jenna Jameson day after today throughout the exhibit. There were a bunch of unhappy studies at present but one stood out. Dee, a listener who's had a bunch of unhealthy good fortune following him around, was picked out of all the other unhappy sacks available in the market. Dee mentioned that his mom and sister each died then at some point he ran out of fuel and as he used to be going to get gas he used to be rear ended via an additional automobile. He awoke in the health center ok however the doctors observed that he had testicular melanoma and penile melanoma. It is in a very developed stage so that they'd need to take away his penis and testicles. Even with that he'd still most effective have a 15% threat of dwelling. Dee chose to hold his penis. He is most often going to die inside 6 to three hundred and sixty five days or so. Dee received out of his group of reviews so now there were 3 finalists. The grand prize winner was once introduced later within the morning. Web page visit Of The Day. 10/9/97. 7:15am some of the contestants in the Jenna Jameson game is a guy who invented a self lighting pipe. He has a website of his own where you will discover the pipe so Howard checked it out. The website was once at www.The-pipe.Com. Dallas Station Being bought through Nationwide coverage! 10/9/97. 7:20am Dallas fanatics should be really pissed off now. Nationwide coverage has put KEGL up on the market after losing Howard from the station. Howard pointed out this for approximately 2 minutes this morning. He read about it in some industry e-newsletter. I do not know what that implies for Stern lovers down there but when another company buys the station probably they will put Howard back on. Don't rely on it though. Kiki The Drag Queen. 10/9/ninety seven. 7:25am This drag queen got here in to inform his/her/it's story about getting beat up while performing at Madonna's birthday party just lately. Kiki had an awfully masculine voice however he saved denying that he was a drag queen. He stated that he's had 3 kids and that he lost his breasts to breast melanoma or whatever like that. Unluckily I neglected a few of his story however from what I would hear, he acquired kicked by any individual at Madonna's birthday social gathering. He was once performing some songs and any person attacked him for no good purpose. Instead of that there wasn't so much of a narrative. Kiki wasn't that first-class as a guest. Howard Talks To Michelle The Tree house mom. 10/9/97. 7:35am there is a girl in Illinois who moved out of her condominium into a tree apartment due to the fact that she felt that he kids weren't appreciating all of the things she was doing for them. Good one among Howard's listeners went down to the girl's house with a cell cell to peer if she'd let Howard interview her. There have been a bunch of tv cameras ther masking the story. The guy with the cell just walked correct as much as the lady and requested her if she'd prefer to speak to Howard. She authorized so Howard spoke to her for a minute. Then a tv crew interrupted the conversation and Michelle stated that she had to talk to them. Howard had her keep the phone nearby so he might proceed after the tv interview. A few minutes later he was once interviewing her again. He asked her why she was doing this and crap like that. Jim Belushi is available in. 10/9/97. 8:20am Actor Jim Belushi came in to plug his new movie ''Gang associated''. He stars in it with the late Tupac Shakur. Howard spent lots of the interview playing tape of a phony telephone call that Gary made to Jim. It was once like the call to Tom Arnold from a couple of weeks ago the place Gary would ask the fellow if he would provide you with some outrageous story to inform on the air. He'd ask them to claim ridiculous matters and so they'd refuse. Gary requested Jim to assert things about humans like Dan Aykroyd and Princess Diana. Of course Jim did not agree to claim some thing in view that he failed to want to burn any bridges. Jim had to be rushed out of the studio when you consider that he had other suggests to do. Howard Talks To Fran Drescher On The mobile. 10/9/ninety seven. 9:45am When Fran Drescher used to be on lately she asked Howard if he'd do her show. He stated he would however later had 2nd ideas about it. He couldn't tell her no with out Robin's help so he did it on the mobile this morning. It wasn't an handy task although. Fran was once 1/2 asleep once they bought her on the telephone. Howard informed her that her exhibit ''The Nanny'' simply wasn't the correct factor for him to do. Fran instructed him that they'd make it effortless on him and are available to NY city to shoot the scene correct within the studio. It would most effective take an hour and it could be easy. Howard instructed her no about 10 instances however she just wouldn't hear of it. She wouldn't stop. She just stored going and going looking to get him to do it but


Howard already made up his mind. At one point Howard's mother known as in and advised Howard that he must simply do the exhibit and let Fran stop begging. Howard stood his floor and didn't provide in. He did not want to damage Fran's feelings but she did seem a little bit upset in regards to the entire factor. Howard advised her that he'd talk to his agent about the main issue to look if he should do it. Don't count on him showing up on the show. The Jenna Jameson Nude Rubdown Contest Winner Is. 10/9/97. 10:30am good it used to be late in the exhibit after they sooner or later bought round to making a choice on the winner for this nude rubdown. There were three finalists for the contest: Kevin - The 30 year historic virgin Dee - The penis cancer guy who would not have long to are living Kevin - The blind man who was once shot in the face Howard and Robin painstakingly went over every of the stories and picked Dee as the grand prize winner. Dee shall be down on the studio tomorrow for his rubdown. Assess again the next day for the full story. -- Wednesday October 8, 1997 -- it can be Time to ignore Andrew dice Clay. 10/8/97. 6:45am After enormous Black played the hard copy piece on dice and Howard's feud which aired the day gone by Howard made up our minds that it can be time to ignore him. Dice was once interviewed via the difficult replica folks and he challenged Howard to a conflict of wits. He wishes to do it in someplace like Madison rectangular backyard. Well Howard's no longer going to have whatever to do with anything like that. On hard reproduction dice said that he is unwell of Howard getting publicity off of his identify. Uh, cube, I believe it can be the other way round. That's what Howard thinks also so he mentioned that he is not going to talk about him anymore. Jenna Jameson Nude therapeutic massage Contest! 10/eight/ninety seven. 7:00am This Friday porn megastar Jenna Jameson will be coming in. She will probably be giving one lucky listener a nude rubdown. The listener with the saddest story will win the competition and get the rubdown. This morning Howard began taking agencies of callers with their sad reviews. Out of each and every crew they'll pick the one with the saddest story. Out of that group they will prefer the ultimate grand prize winner to get the rubdown. Howard took two organizations of calls this morning and picked two finalists. The primary finalist is Kevin, a 30 yr old virgin. As quickly as Howard heard that the man used to be a 30 12 months old virgin he said ''He wins..''. Robin ultimately agreed with him so he's in. Out of the 2d group of callers an additional man by way of the title of Kevin won. This Kevin is blind. He was shot in the face by way of someone and lost his sight. So there now we have it. Two finalists up to now. We'll most of the time have extra tomorrow. Fred's CD Dedication. 10/eight/97. 7:25am Fred's band King Norris recently released a CD. Howard simply learned about it and skim the dedication within. It can be committed to Fred's spouse Alison. Howard read it on the air and no longer distinctly it failed to make so much sense. It said anything about his spouse sticking with him via all of the crap. Howard cannot suppose what crap he was speaking about. Howard additionally performed a track off of the album called ''Tearing Down The walls''. It is about his relationship along with his wife. Robin stated that she had to listen to it a bunch of instances to take a look at and make experience out of it. She did not have any good fortune. (the following was brought 10/01/09) Howard read that Steve Grillo bought a dedication too. Fred stated that's when you consider that he used to show as much as a bunch of gigs. Howard brought up the incident that Fred and his spouse had on the Rainbow Room one night time. Jackie advised Howard about that incident again. He informed Howard that the room was once rotating and by the point Fred and his wife's desk acquired again to where they were, the desk had been cleared and Fred and his wife were gone. Fred mentioned that he bumped the table along with his hip and he didn't knock the table over or whatever. Gary said he remembers hearing from that man who used to be there who stated he saw Fred throw a tumbler at the wall. Fred went off on Gary and mentioned that might be they must talk about his marriage too. He said that Gary likes to interject and he has no business doing that with that story. Gary said he was just telling them what that caller mentioned when he used to be on the air. Howard asked Fred some questions about what the battle was about at the Rainbow Room. Fred gave one of the most important points and stated that it occurred 4 years before. Howard advised Fred that he must lay off the drinking on the grounds that that appears to result in main issue. Howard played the monitor ''Tearing Down the partitions'' from Fred's album. Howard mentioned it was type of a Latin sound. He and Robin tried to determine what the lyrics had been about. They weren't having any good fortune figuring them out. Howard asked what the hell he was once speaking about. Howard informed Fred that he will have to keep all of this stuff locked up inside him and not let it all out. He mentioned that a relationship is making your self appear like a hero instead of breaking all of those awful small print of his lifestyles to her. Howard mentioned he appears like a hero to his kids seeing that of that. Howard performed more of Fred's music and stated he will get it now. He cut it off and gave Fred some plugs for the CD. Rapper Busta Rhymes comes in. 10/8/ninety seven. Eight:50am Busta Rhymes came in to plug his album ''When catastrophe Strikes''. Howard interviewed him for somewhat bit and performed pre-recorded tapes of people out on the road asking questions. They are not ordinary men and women, they sound like drunks. He says that the questions are for Busta himself but he is used the tapes for different individuals like Chris Rock. One of the vital questions had been: was Mike Tyson railroaded on rape expenditures? Is OJ Simpson guilty? Do gentle skinned black individuals get preferential treatment over dark skinned black persons? Did you take part within the L.A. Riots? Would you do a rap tune with OJ? Will have to blacks and whites are living individually? Would you ride in a vehicle with Rodney King? Busta answered most of the questions. He thinks that OJ was hooked up to a exact extent through the L.A. Police officers and he mentioned he'd do a rap track with OJ each time. Howard kept Busta around for the duration of the next segment.. 2 guys got here in to devour Hershey Kisses out of Jackie's ass for private components Prize applications! Exclusive parts Prize package Giveaway. Devour Hershey Kiss Out Of Jackie's Ass! 10/eight/ninety seven. 9:10am A listener from New Jersey known as in previous this morning and asked if he could consume a Hershey Kiss out of Jackie's ass for a confidential materials Prize bundle. Howard informed him to get down there as fast as viable. He was on his method in when a different man called in from NY city and stated that he might be there quicker than the other guy to do the same thing. Howard told him to return in. They each showed up in order that they each got to do their thing. Tommy from Secaucus, NJ was the first man to name in. The opposite guy who known as himself ''Hoss'' is the fellow from town. Howard had Jackie put 2 of those chocolate Hershey Kisses in his butt crack to heat them up. It sounded like Howard expected the blokes to take the


Kisses out of the crack with toothpicks and devour them but that is no longer what they ended up doing. Each and every man had to bend over and get the Kiss out of Jackie's ass together with his mouth. Tommy did it lovely quick. Busta Rhymes was once amazed and disgusted for the period of the whole thing. He said it have to be a ''white thing''. ''Hoss'' was once up subsequent to dig into Jackie's ass. His job wasn't going to be convenient although. The second Hershey Kiss was buried in Jackie's ass pretty rattling just right. Hoss had to dig in there fairly a long way to get his prize package deal. Everyone used to be calling him a homo seeing that he was once down there see you later. Jackie even jumped at one factor on account that the fellow's nose was once so cold. Just one more day on the strict exhibit. Scott The Engineer Loses His guess. 10/7/97. 6:05am As expected, Scott The Engineer lost his wager with Howard on who would win the yankee game last night. As quickly as Howard received on the air he was once goofing on Scott and the way he loses at the whole lot he does. If Scott bets on anything you can virtually guarantee that he'll lose the wager. Some listeners have been pissed that Scott made the Yankees lose the game however some certainly guess against the Yanks and won some colossal money. One man claimed that he gained $8000 considering that of Scott. Scott's loss is our achieve. For his loss he needed to dress in a bra and panties and stroll around the block out on the streets of New York city. Howard didnt' make it a quickie either. He dragged it out for over an hour. As soon as Howard picked out the correct outfit for Scott, Amy the intern mentioned she had to see him. She came in and laughed it up just a little. He used to be sporting thong undies so his unpleasant ass was once showing and he was wearing a DD-Cup size bra which he stuffed in particularly well in step with Robin. Scott ultimately made it out onto the streets and there have been a lot of humans waiting to look him. He stated that quite a few persons had been throwing money at him. One lady even desired him to bounce for her. Can't wait to look this one on E! Author Barbara Berg On The phone. 10/7/ninety seven. 7:50am This lady wrote a guide known as ''What To Do When life Is driving You crazy''. It's truly a ebook to tell you what to do when your spouse is nagging you. Howard took a bunch of calls from listeners with marriage problems and Barbara would attempt to provide them some recommendation. Her voice was once fairly demanding so I quite wasn't listening too closely to her. Maybe the booklet is best than her radio look.. I have no idea. If you'd like to get the booklet here is the quantity: 1-800-669-0773 or go to your local e-book store and verify it out. Cellphone intercourse With Howard. 10/7/ninety seven. Eight:40am I do not know what it was with traumatic voices at present but Howard had a legitimate telephone sex girl on the mobile in these days and her voice used to be lovely bad. Some woman known as in and stated that she would placed on this so referred to as professional cellphone intercourse girl so Howard took her up on the offer. A little bit while later this lady Holly was making an attempt telephone intercourse with Howard. Howard received sidetracked for a few minutes but then went back to it. When she started saying that she'd lick his interior thighs he had to hold up. I suppose he used to be afraid that he'd get too dirty for the radio. Cube On hard copy Tonight. 10/7/97. 9:00am a couple of people informed Howard that Andrew dice Clay is meant to be on rough replica in these days speaking about their feud. I suppose dice goes to make a profession out of his battle with Howard now. Verify it out if you get a threat. Alice, The Black girl Who Dislikes Black folks. 10/7/ninety seven. 9:20am This woman referred to as in a few months in the past. She mentioned that although she's black herself she would not like black men and women. She got here into the studio today to tell her story. Truly it was YELL her story. Howard saved striking people on the mobile with Alice and so they'd say whatever to her and she'd go nuts yelling at them. It was beautiful humorous. Basically Alice doesn't like black individuals for the reason that she's been ripped off by using black humans for the period of her existence. There used to be a sexy humorous story that Scott Einziger needed to inform. Scott was once within the mens lavatory when he heard a sound subsequent to him. It grew to become out to be Alice! She was once within the mens room. She stated whatever like ''..Rattling it, this is the mens room. I've executed this earlier than. ''. She said that she was sleepy and that she did not understand which toilet she was in. She had accomplished it as soon as earlier than when she used to be more youthful additionally. Scott also mentioned that she was on her interval so he saw things that he should not have. One caller was once chanting voo doo stuff to Alice but she just yelled on the guy so you might barely hear it. Earlier than she left she cried about losing her mom and dad and sister. She didn't say how she misplaced them however she wept for a couple of minutes. Howard just laughed. Simply How fats Is Scott The Engineer? 10/6/ninety seven. 7:35am Scott the engineer came into the studio for some cause this morning and the subject of his weight came up. He is won rather a number of kilos for the reason that quitting smoking just a few months ago. Each person determined to bet on what he weighs. It was a small wager put they pooled the cash together for whoever would get closest to his weight without going over. Stuttering John guessed 265 kilos, Gary stated 258, Robin mentioned 250, Jackie stated 270, Fred said 220 and Howard said 235. His exact weight was once 265 kilos! He's 6'1'' tall incidentally. Stuttering John received the wager. After that bet Howard desired to wager Scott on the yank baseball game. Howard said that he'd put up $500. If Scott wins he will get the $500. If he loses he has to dress in bra and panties and walk across the block. Scott never wins when he bets so Yankee fanatics watch out. Scott selected the yankee's to win tonight. Scott is also strolling the streets day after today morning. Female Farting Contest. 10/6/ninety seven. 7:55am best three females showed up for this new contest this morning. Gary said that he had 7 females scheduled to do it. The purpose is to peer who can blow a fart the quickest. Gary had a discontinue watch to time the fart. He validated it out on Howard first. Howard blew a pair, one in 2.Four seconds then one in 1.14 seconds and sooner or later one in .Seventy four seconds. The first girl up was once Claudia. She couldn't pull it off although she claimed last week that she would be able to do it after ingesting some milk. The second contestant was once Mary. Mary set free a barely audible fart in 22.62 seconds. The last contestant, Veronica, came up and let one rip in 2.21 seconds! And this was no dainty fart. It was an terrible sounding nasty blast of a cabbage fart. Inside a couple of seconds Howard caught a whiff and almost puked. Veronica said that she ate a 1/4 head of cabbage to come up with the contest profitable entry or exit as the case could also be. She won a circular shuttle ticket to Las Vegas. Look out Las Vegas! Comic Chris Rock is available in. 10/6/ninety seven. Eight:35am Chris Rock came in to plug his book ''Rock This'' and his comedy CD ''Roll With the brand new''. Howard presented Chris to that white


comedian Colt forty-Feinberg who was once on the exhibit last week. Colt sounds so much like Chris Rock. Chris failed to find Colt too funny. He saved asking Howard the place he observed these people. Howard additionally had some tape of men and women who wanted to ask Chris questions. It was speculated to be men and women out on the avenue. It grew to become out to be black persons who could barely converse. Howard would play the tape and Chris would just maintain asking ''where do you find these folks?'' over and over again. It was truely beautiful humorous. After these questions Howard said that he had a listener who received the correct to come back in and ask Chris a question in individual. That listener was once Crackhead Bob. He mumbled whatever and Chris asked ''the place do you in finding these humans?'' once again. There have been additionally a few people on the telephone who said that they grew up with Chris. One man stated that he used to beat Chris up. The cellphone calls did not quite go anyplace although. Eddie Murphy's Uncle Ray Calls In. 10/6/97. 10:00am Eddie Murphy's uncle Ray called in for some unusual motive this morning. He didn't rather have anything fascinating to speak about but I idea i might point out it anyway. Girl From The Cultural environment action Calls In. 10/6/ninety seven. 10:45am earlier in the morning Howard learn a fax about this group ''The Cultural environment action'' who's joining folks in Canada to take a look at and get Howard thrown off the air up there. Near the top of the exhibit a member of the board of this ridiculous group was on the mobile. She tried to provide an explanation for why they are trying to get Howard off the air but it quite failed to make an excessive amount of sense. Her crew thinks that Howard must be taken off the air on the grounds that of his ''hateful'' feedback about the French people. It's Howard's opinion so he would not recognize why humans will have to be so involved about it. He requested her the next query: ''shall we say it's World war 2 and that i went on the air and said that I hate the Nazi's. Will have to I be taken off the air for that?''. The woman couldn't supply him an answer. She stored warding off the field. He asked her over and over however she just would not budge. The 2 of them went at it for approximately quarter-hour. When she eventually had to go Howard advised her that she was very brave to return on the radio. Update: Jolean The Breast Implant woman. 10/3/ninety seven. 6:55am you may do not forget this woman from her last look in July. She came in and wanted to get breast implants considering that hers have been really tiny. She was shot within the head by means of her boyfriend however lived and all she wanted used to be massive breasts. Well a physician called in an furnished to do them free of charge. She had them achieved and she or he got here in today to show them off. Jolean can barely stroll but she has first-rate colossal breasts now. Howard mentioned that before she even bought the implants she was once supplying oral sex to people she barely knew. She furnished Doug from E! Once they have been in a limo with the intention to the physician's place of job. She also supplied it to the limo driver. Since she had the implants she mentioned that about 5 or 6 guys were capable to contact her new breasts. She had some old black guy with her on the show at present but he was once simply helping her out. She didn't even need him to see her breasts. She had some strange story about how them met nevertheless it didn't make a lot experience. Daniel Carver Awarded F-Emmy For ''exceptional Daniel Carver appearance''. 10/3/ninety seven. 7:35am one more F-Emmy award today. This one was for the ''satisfactory Daniel Carver appearance'' so there used to be no means he'd lose. Here have been the nominees: Daniel's KKK message about Martin Luther King. Daniel's feelings about Tiger Woods. Daniel's KKK message about men and women tampering together with his answering computer. The successful appearance used to be all three i suppose. Daniel was once on the cell to be given. He thanked Howard for the gold tampon. Daniel has acquired F-Emmy's prior to now however he said that he is certainly not bodily received the award except now. Daniel used to be his usual racist self on the cellphone and spewed his dumb assed messages whilst Howard talked over him. Howard additionally had a black guy on the mobilephone to yell at Daniel. Pat Cooper is available in. 10/three/ninety seven. 8:05am comic Pat Cooper got here in for some reason today. This can be an award winning appearance too. Howard had tape of Pat bad mouthing him on some tv show. Pat stated that he under no circumstances dangerous mouths Howard but Howard had the tape. Pat was once more riled up than normal in these days. He was yelling and screaming about crap that simply did not make experience as usual. He thinks that he could beat Howard in the scores if he had his possess radio show on whilst. He desired to do this in Las Vegas but he desired like $1 Million for it. No radio station would pay him that if he hasn't validated himself yet. As Pat used to be getting equipped to depart Howard stated anything about doing Pat a desire, letting him on the show. Good Pat lost it. He went nuts and stated that Howard wasn't doing him any favors and he didn't want any favors from anybody. The guy is nuts. It's hard to tell whether or not or not Pat was once sincerely mad or no longer. Gary came again in later in the exhibit and stated that Pat had some matters to plug however he wouldn't inform Gary what they were on the grounds that he did not want any favors performed for him. What a nut! Optimistically this may increasingly exhibit up on E! Within the near future so we can see Pat losing it as soon as once more. Flip Wilson Awarded F-Emmy For ''Wackiest famous person moment''. 10/three/97. Eight:50am The FEmmy for ''Wackiest famous person second'' was once awarded to Flip Wilson for his displaying of the penis episode. Here have been the nominees: Geraldo Rivera calls the exhibit barely coherent after doing his exhibit for 20 hours straight. Roy Firestone sings a song parody about Kato Kaelin. Flip Wilson shows his penis and lets Robin Radzinski pump it up. Flip was once on the cellphone to be given his award. He said that he is been getting a number of calls from ancient girlfriends and new ladies. He additionally mentioned that he had really a flight home after doing the show. The flight attendants stored bringing him caviar and lobster. He ended up asking if they had heard him on Howard. That they had and i assume that is why they had been bringing him all the pricey meals. The Mike Walker recreation. 10/3/ninety seven. 9:10am For state-of-theart Mike Walker sport we had Colt 40-Feinberg enjoying along on the mobile. Colt is the comedian who played the ''Wuz up wit my secret'' game on Tuesday. His actual name is Neil Feinberg and he did his black comedian impression in the course of the whole recreation. So listed below are this week's reviews: Liz Taylor used to be bitten by way of a spider. She had an allergy and had EMT's standing by way of at some operate she went to. Sharon Stone is having all of her limo drivers screened for medications and alcohol use after the lady Diana incident. Yasmine Bleeth was hanging out with her neighbors even as bowling. She located a unfastened string on her gown, she pulled it and the subsequent time she bowled, she


ripped the dress exposing her jazzy pink panties. Jerry Seinfeld has been spending plenty of time with co-megastar Julia Louis-Dreyfus' new child these days. He said that he'd like to discover a girl to relax with so he could have one. Colt 40Feinberg selected the primary story because the false, Fred chose quantity 2, Robin picked four, Jackie picked three and Howard picked 4. The actual fake story for this week was quantity three, the Yasmine Bleeth story. Mike said that the story was genuine but no longer for Yasmine. It happened to Christina Applegate years ago. -- Thursday October 2, 1997 -exceptional Of Stern. 10/2/97. These are the days the place Howard being half Jewish is available in helpful. He gets to take trip today for Rosh Hashana. Listed below are cutting-edge featured segments: ''i like Lucy'' bit. Dialogue about one in all Jackie's lame jokes. Sportscaster Al Michaels is available in. Howard complains about his wife listening to the exhibit. Lady who claimed to be Madonna's sister called in. Ian the drunk calls in and rambles on and on. -- Wednesday October 1, 1997 -Paul Rodriguez stories On His Conan O'Brien appearance. 10/1/ninety seven. 6:15am the day prior to this for the period of Paul Rodriguez's look on the exhibit he mentioned that he was once going to be appearing on the Late night with Conan O'Brien show. They asked him to do a stand-up events but he failed to wish to. So he advised Howard that he would simply repeat Conan's monolog however do it funnier. He referred to as on this morning to tell Howard what truly happened. He went on and did what he mentioned however when he watched the show later that night he noticed that they cut most of his stuff out. He simply wanted Howard to grasp that he failed to wimp out. He did what he said that the men and women at Late night time cut it up. Site Of The Day. 10/1/97. 7:10am Howard had an additional cool web page to talk over with at present. It is www.Thatguy.Com/splash/. It can be called ''Flash Mountain'' and it has graphics which might be taken close the end of the ''Splash Mountain'' journey at Disneyland out in California. That's now not the cool part although. These are a opt for few the place women have lifted their shirts up simply because the picture used to be taken. You have got to see it. Be warned although, some of the ladies aren't exactly attractive. Sy Sperling, Hair membership For men President, Calls In. 10/1/97. 7:20am he is now not best the President, he is a member too.. Sy Sperling got here on the show to ''out'' celebrities who have hair pieces. It did not fairly come to be that massive of a deal though. Sy brought up some celebrities who most people already know have unhealthy wigs like: Ted Danson Elton John Tony Bennett Howard additionally learn a record of celebs who Sy thinks can have had whatever executed to their hair like: Paul Reiser Al Pachino Whitney Houston Charles Bronson Nicolas Cage Nothing too interesting there. Sy plugged his ''Hair club For men'' corporation and stated that they're providing free hair for kids who've cancer and have lost their hair for the reason that of the chemotherapy. If you need to get in touch with them their quantity is 1-800-HAIRCLUB. John Popper On The phone. 10/1/ninety seven. 7:40am Robin read a narrative within the news the day prior to this about one of the vital contributors of Blues traveler getting arrested for cocaine possession up in Canada. The article failed to point out which member it was so Howard tracked down lead singer John Popper to discover who it used to be. Well, it wasn't John. Howard was once relieved to listen to that. Joh. How To Increase Your Penile Length For Free Line said that it was the bass player Bob Sheehan. John did not give an excessive amount of understanding about it on account that it just happened but the authorities up there have been very cooperative. He is been released and they opened for The Rolling Stones final night time. Robin's Masturbation Revelation. 10/1/97. 7:55am After Howard said anything about no longer pleasuring himself for three days in a row Robin mentioned that she did herself final night time. Howard asked her who she though about even as she was doing it. She wouldn't exactly admit to it however Howard figured it was her ex-boyfriend Tony. Oops. Mr. X. Robin simply giggled when Howard brought him up so i'm assuming that he was the person she was once occupied with. She also said that she thinks about Richard Gere and some newscaster from big apple when she pleasures herself. Corey Feldman Wins F-Emmy For ''nice superstar battle''. 10/1/97. 8:10am This yr's F-Emmy awards goes to last perpetually I think.. Right here were the nominees for ''quality superstar fight'': Corey Feldman fights with his father concerning the cash his father stole from him. Carol Shaya fights with Gary about doing a Lesbian kiss on the air. Jackie fights with Rodney Dangerfield about cash that he borrowed from him. Corey Feldman used to be the winner so he used to be on the mobile to be given. He gave his acceptance speech however rambled on a little bit too long so Howard had to reduce him off. Howard used to be in a rush so he didn't spend an excessive amount of time speakme to him. Fran Drescher is available in. 10/1/97. 8:35am Fran Drescher used to be in to plug the season top-rated of her CBS exhibit ''The Nanny'' which airs tonight. Howard said that she's looking great and she was dressed beautiful attractive. Howard needed to find out extra about her marriage breakup. She and her husband recently broke up however got back collectively as buddies in view that they're business partners. She mentioned in these days that she's nonetheless good buddies with him but she has slept with a few different men seeing that their breakup. One guy she had intercourse with at the back of a limo! She didn't get into an excessive amount of detail about that though. She and Howard additionally spent a short while talking concerning the tabloid magazines and the way in which photographers chase celebrities.

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