February 2021 Bad Love Issue

Page 1

Ms. Heel

February 2021

For Higher Highs...

Suite Sexy Thang! Sexy suites around the world to celebrate Valentine's Day love potions magically delicious

HOW TO BE A BAD BITCH! When Your Love Is Fake AF! LBD:

lil backless dress

$5.99

Tied Down by love

Are Men Out of Style? a soleful conversation:

The Lady & The Tramp

bad love issue


Ms. Heel

February 2021

For Higher Highs...

Are Men Still In Style?

SPECIAL DOUBLE ISSUE for February, pick up our good love mag!

THE NEW RULES FOR DATING lock your love down! Love Is Color Blind-ish

BLACK LOVE shop black owned for VDay

ACCESSORIZE YOUR LOVE Aye, Anklets!

$5.99

good love issue


19 20

28 55 63

By Velicia Hill R E T A I L

T H E R A P Y

Your in-store pick me up! S O C I A L

S T U D I E S

Things we learned scrolling thru social media. H O L L A !

See what our readers have to say.

D I R E C T O R ' S

C U T

Know Your Worth Calculator Charm by BAUBLEBAR $13

See what made the fashionable cut! M O N T H L Y

SHOEBOX

13 14

E D I T O R

E E D D II S S N N II

12

F R O M

E E H H T T

9 10

L E T T E R

C A L E N D A R

See all the ways to rejuvenate & reboot this month. V E L I C I O U S

(see good love) H E E L

R E P A I R

We help fix your high heeled problems! H E E L

H O R O S C O P E

(see good love)

M S . H E E L

O F

T H E

M O N T H

(see good love)

MsHeel.com | 3


feetures

inside the February issue 2021. Year 1 p g . 1 5

m e n

p g . 2 1

h o w

b e

a r e

o f

s t y l e

a case AGAINST men!

t o

a

p g . 2 5

b a d

o u t

n a i l

a r t !

b i t c h !

we show you how!

show your hand this Valentine's Day!

p g . 2 9

T h e

L a d y

&

T h e

T r a m p

a soul to sole conversation p g . 4 7

S U I T E

p g . 3 5

S E X Y

T H A N G !

GOT A SUITE B a c k

i n

p g . 3 7

L o v e

l o v e ! P o t i o n s

lil backless dresses!

seduce your lover with these tricks!

TOOTH?


feetures

inside the February issue 2021. Year 1

p g . 3 4

f a k e

p g . 4 0

A F

l o v e . . . s u g a r !

w h e n

i t ' s

t o o

b i g !

NOT his penis--your vagina!

p g . 5 2

t i e d

d o w n

b y

l o v e !

a love story p g . 4 4

p g . 6 0

b e

l o v e

a

s u c k s !

h o p e a h o l i c

we got proof--in writing!

we'll give you strength & courage!

MsHeel.com | 5


See other love potions & tricks for Valentine's Day. pg. 37

Tom Ford's Rose Prick Parfum 8.5 oz $895


will work for shoes EDITOR-IN-CHIEF FASHION DIRECTOR HEALTH & MEDICAL EDITOR

Velicia Hill @VeliciaHill Holly Renee @HauteFlashStyle Nurse Blu @SchaeferKristen

PHOTO & VIDEO EDITOR

Kevin Schaefer @Porkenstein_Producktions

WRITER & COPY EDITOR

Jane Garretson @janejane44

CONTRIBUTING EDITOR

Tara Stravinsky @TyesByTara

SEX & LIFESTYLE EDITOR EDITORIAL OFFICES CONTRIBUTORS

@TheSingleSiren Produced with so much sole in Atlanta, GA. (your name here)

Ms. Heel Magazine is published and owned by The Chocolate Princess, LLC.

MsHeel.com | 7


'HIGH-KU'

a f o s n o i c o n fe ss r e y l f t n fre q u e

Sometimes it gets 'complicated' in the real world. So I escape to the other side in a leap, in a hurl. Freedom without limits no boundaries to block the mind or the heart; A chance to explore some deeper recesses, to no one I report. My frequent mind miles have tallied up quickly, been to that place where I felt the most pain...and some pleasures immensely. Behaviors that are sure to make me a sinner. Jetted my way down under to some emotions I care not to remember Journeyed to the center of my soul that nothing can equate. Something I've yet to take back as a keepsake.

Poetry by Ms. Heel Sketch by Kevin Schaefer

Maybe one day I won't have to retreat to get higher. But for now you've just listened to the confessions of a frequent flyer.


Letter From The Editor-In-Chief

c i p " k c a throw "b 2013 fo me in

How do you spell exhausted? I spell it: DOUBLE ISSUE! Whew...my team and I worked over time to bring you love from all sides. Actually two sides--the good and the bad. We wanted to explore how love can impact your life in so many areas. We all are either loving someone, some thing, some celebrity, some shoes, some television show, some sports team and yes, even ourselves.

cover shot! Out of the aforementioned--it's shoes for us! WE HEART HEELS! And nothing is sexier to us than to pair a sexy pair of heels with an open back, slinky dress. Now, that's how you make an entrance and an exit! Whenever I see a woman who knows how to dress, accentuates her best assets and knows she looks good minus the cockiness, I say, "That's a bad bitch!" We've all seen her out; she personifies bad meaning good. And I for one love it!

We simply cannot escape love. See ya right "back" here in March!

ill H a i c i Vel

MsHeel.com | 9


RETAIL THERAPY

WE

In Store PICK ME UP!

COUNTRY: Europe & United States

but the game is much more tame!

STORE: Multiple

STORES! F A SH

IO N

ORT PASSP

There are now 26 boutiques around Europe and in the

ADDRESS: agentprovocateur.com

The company was founded in

United States. If looking for

If you think that this Agent Provocateur

1994 by the son of fashion

expensive, cutting-edge and

window above is sexy...titillating, and some

designer

dare I say, provocative

would say bordering on bad taste, you

Joseph Corre & now ex-wife,

lingerie, congrats, you're their

should've been paying attention years ago.

Serena Rees. Fun fact: Joseph

newest Agent of Provocateur.

Trust me when I tell you--plenty of pearls

was the actual designer, not his

Your mission: blow minds.

were

sexy

wife. Matrimonal bliss carried

reincarnations that included divorce of

over for a short time and the

original owners, private equity busts and

couple operated the first store in

CEO exits, beautiful lingerie is still their

SoHo London until 2007.

game,

clutched!

After

several

Vivenne

Westwood,

(LOOK AT THIS!) No website information available All images are courtesy of Pinterest


MsHeel.com | 11


Social Studies things we learned & saw on social media


HOLLA

...if ya feel us!

WHAT READERS THINK OF OUR MAG!

Wher

Jeffrey

e Chelping an I Ge to Thank you for tA Subscr i p break gender sterotypes tion? & make fashion inclusive! All the love!!!

est r e o f e zin D a g y a Ra el m

sHe story M t s to rea ar! k g n s Tha or thi ris De f Do on

Mom @Gypsy

@kirkman03

ile...just t a s r e v It's so ed I'm excit ! g n i h t y ever article! x e s e h t to read

Ladies the magazine is litespecially for you "high heel" enthusiast!

Yayyyy...December Mag is here! I look forward to getting that IG post...why do we have to wait 30 days?

We'd love to know your thoughts as well; simply leave a comment on Ms.Heel.com or social media and we'll feature you next month! Please note: due to space constraints and content of comments, MsHeel.com | 13 not all comments will be published.


FASHION DIRECTOR's CUT!

Holly

C u t th e try s s e n y sh y x e s e s e th s! l e w e j y bod

GoddessLuxeStore c/o Etsy $30

bodychainstore.com $17.99

TheBohoBoutique.com $16.95


T T U U O O F F O O ! ! E E L L Y Y T T S S MsHeel.com | 1 5


STYLE

For the plaintiff: Jane Garretson

SOME WOMEN ARE INTO MEN! BUT SEE WHY I THINK MEN NEED TO GO OUT OF

STYLE!


STYLE

Hi, my name is Jane and I am PISSED OFF at men! Let me be very clear: I do not dislike or feel angry with all men. In fact, I hold in high esteem many men: my stepfather, who married my mother as a young widow with two little girls and raised us as his own; those men who saw my worth as my supervisors or administrators in various educational positions I have held; my sons, who have grown into successful men of integrity; and most important, my husband, who has always encouraged and supported me in many career moves. Through the years we have partnered in every way. My case is against a particular ilk or style of menthose who enjoy male privilege: their penis power, so to speak, in a way that seems to thrive on the victimization, demeaning or denigration of others-usually women, but sometimes children or anyone they think is ‘less than.’ Over the years, in my professional life, I experienced from certain men behaviors I doubt they would have shown other males. There was the administrator who felt he could put his arm around my shoulders, then say to his male colleague, “How old do you think she is?” (This after I had done a presentation to the board in defense of my program.) I did have the satisfaction of seeing his male colleague-an attorney- blanch at the remark. There was the client who felt I needed to hold his warm, clammy hand because I had invited him to be my guest at a business function. I well remember the short supervisor who was the brunt of cynical humor by every female around him: we all knew he never made eye contact with us-he was too busy looking at our breasts.

Of course, he was so short that to make eye contact, he would have had to look up at most of us! Some might say I come across as a POWand I am! Over the years I have come to realize I am a Pissed Off Woman! I am so sick of men who think it is okay to abuse their power. Yes, #45, I am thinking of youwho bragged you could fondle any woman you want- and still you were voted into a position of great power. And what of those scions of business, those politicians, those news analysts who have either sent pictures of their penises or exposed themselves deliberately or "accidentally” to hapless women. Really?! Do they seriously think we need to see their ‘one-eyed’ wonder? I am thinking of the Wall Street Journal op-ed writer who suggested Dr. Jill Biden drop ‘Dr.’ from her name because "PHDs aren’t impressive anymore." This from an academic wannabe who hasn’t been associated with a college for 19 years! What is it with these so-called men? Do they only feel powerful through diminishing women? For decades priests have gotten away with sexually abusing children. Were these pedophiles locked up? No, most were sequestered or relocated--often to continue their despicable ways. Deviant Boy Scout leaders were ultimately the downfall of the scouting organization. Too many religious traditions demand that women be submissive; that they hide themselves in modest dress, wigs, scarfs or burkas. Certain African tribes practice female mutilation, removing young women’s clitorises to control them. Why are such religions-such men-so afraid of a woman's sexual power that it must be obliterated? MsHeel.com | 17


STYLE

I have known women who are victims of both sexual and domestic violence. Guessing the power of a fist and a penis was meant to keep them under control. Is that it? Is masculinity or virility, for some men, ultimately about control? I was once “such a pretty girl”- I have known objectification from certain kinds of men; the discomfort of being looked over, leered at, catcalled, commented about. When I expressed discomfort, I was told in essence, to “Get over it; what did I expect?” Here’s what I know: we women have had to fight harder and longer for the most basic rights many men experience. And we have a long way to go; women rarely earn equal pay for equal work; working mothers carry most of the load in their households and too often are discriminated against in the workplace.

Women are expected to be deferential to the men with whom they interact in the workplace. Women in power are too often viewed as bitches by the men around themor it may be believed that they ‘slept their way’ to the top. Was it a man that started the rumors about Kamala Harris? Hmmm? Women have been fighting for decades to be seen as equal to men. The ‘Battle of the Sexes’ continues. I suspect many of these women are, like me, POWs--and weary of the gender wars that have so tethered and angered them. We women may not anytime soon win the war against the particular style of men who wage their penis power so flagrantly. But dammit, can we just win some battles? (read the defense/response in our Good Love mag)


HAPPENINGS

FEBRUARY calendar

th e u u o e y s if y o I v i g l d e s t a r h il e u o w I w & t h d o n h it ! o n ..h o l a t s o w n o m e . a l th ~ u n k n m t ste le o g

To An Affair nth! o M r e b m e Rem

by @TheSingleSiren



STYLE

HOW TO BE A BAD BITCH by Velicia Hill MsHeel.com | 21


STYLE BAD BITCH (n) : a stylish confidant woman who knows exactly what she wants, creates her own vibe/reality and never dims her chandelier to make others feel comfortable. I'm not quite sure where the term Bad Bitches originated--perhaps from rap music? Nevertheless, the term perfectly allows women to take back the word Bitch from men and use it to empower ourselves. But as a self-identified Bad Bitch, being a bad bitch DOES NOT mean we get to trample over other's feelings, be rude or conceited.

Matter of fact, bad bitches don't worry ourselves with your life. We're too busy loving ourselves and creating the next happy moments. We do us. We make no excuses for exuding confidence in all areas of our lives. As I always say, "You too can have this hair, outfit, body or shoes for (blank) price." I'm not special...I'm just a bad bitch. Are you?

FAMOUS BAD BITCHES

es! ll Bitch a f o r e th THE Mo

d Reforme rl Bad Gi Bitch!

tch! Diva Bi

Stylish Bitch!

Hills Beverly Bitch!

Boriqu a Bitch !

Bold Bitch!


Pic courtesy of Pinterest

The Elements Of

STYLE

DREAM JOURNAL

I keep a journal for my REM dreams (which provide metaphorical clues to assist me) and for the dreams I want to accomplish in the so-called real

A Bad Bitch

My number 1 bitch secret! Nothing will go well in my life, if my mind & vibe ain't right. This includes daily meditation & yoga.

"Be yourself, everyone else is taken!"

world. I believe all things are possible.

KNOW THYSELF & STYLE

Whenever I style someone, I always ask who's your favorite designer? That's all I need to know. That designer's aesthetic leaves huge clues. Mine? Dolce & Gabbana! The glam, the decadence, the sexiness speaks to my soul! Plus, just like a signature scent, every woman should know her best asset, own a good red lipstick & classic earrings that will go with everything!

Cristabelle drop earrings $30

DOLLARS & SCENTS

Rumor has it, Cleopatra used pheromones and it was her signature secret weapon. I do too--it's an expensive gardenia scent ($325) and I will not tell anyone what it is! Suffice to saymen love it & I get lots of compliments from women, but I feign ignorance on the name.

MINDSIGHT

The book I read over & over again. A MUST for my job as Editor-In-Chief. TheLitBar.com $12.95

I love to pair a sexy oneshoulder midi dress with animal print heels & a bold colored bag for contrast!

Dolce & Gabbana bag $1695

MARTINI

I am never mad at a good cocktail with friends out or at home. ME TIME There is nothing like my Sunday soak-candles, music and my fireplace. It's the perfect 2 hour escape to relax, release and reset.

Ruby Woo Retro Matte by M.A.C. $19

Dolce & Gabbana dress $2945 shoes $597


BAG

AN

Starting @ only $50!

AD!


STYLE

see all the ways to show your hand on Valentine's Day!

Sin fu lC law s.c om

r r e e v v ! ! o o e e v v d d o o n n l l a a r r h h u u o o y y

MsHeel.com | 25


STYLE

c/o Pinterest

c/o Pinterest

c/o Pinterest

c/o Pinterest


STYLE

Pic by @shuey_cortez via Instagram

MsHeel.com | 27


HEEL REPAIR

el e H Ms.

n it

i keep

ith w l rea

els ur he ff yo o p o Dr D! EELE get H & ) s lem (prob

I am in love---FULL STOP! But...my wonderful man when he gets mad, can say some of the nastiest things. Not b*tch, but things like: how uneducated I am, how lazy I can be, or how I'm not a good girlfriend. Is this dysfunctional? It doesn't happen everyday, it only occurs about once every 6 weeks. Outside of that--HE'S SIMPLY AMAZING!

*Ms. Heel: What I’d really like to tell you is to put a FULL STOP to this relationship! Girlfriend, what this “simply amazing" man is doing to you is GASLIGHTING- which is both verbal and emotional abuse. It doesn’t matter how often it happens- what is damaging to your emotional well being is that it does happen. Maybe this dude has never been called on his verbal abuse; maybe that’s what he saw in his home; maybe it’s the stress of Covid. The cause doesn’t matter-what matters is what you can do to protect yourself. Stop making excuses for his behavior; you know something is wrong! Get honest with yourself; only you can take responsibility for your reactions to his nastiness. Can you identify the problem-sort the truth from his distortions? Are you two in some kind of power struggle? Can you picture yourself down the road without him? Can you give yourself permission to feel your feelings of hurt and disappointment? Is your relationship safe enough to tell him his behavior has to change? If you can honestly answer these questions-you will then know what to do about Mr. (not) “Wonderful."

Ms. Low Energy: I am dating a man who wants so much from me, but gives me so little. Should I stoop to his level and give him the same energy, tell him how I feel (which I have done in multiple ways) or leave him?

*Ms. Heel: You gotta give to get--it seems like you did your part. But he's doing a lot of taking and ain't giving. Giving you no choice but to leave him. Therefore, give him yo depleted ass to kiss and give all your low energy to someone else who can fill up your love cup, energize you, and bring you back to life. CLEAR...he's losing you!

If you want a question answered, please email it to: support@msheel.com ~Subject: Keepin' It Real. *our lawyers told us we need to say: for entertainment purposes only*


Pic via Pinterest

HELLO

The Lady & The Tramp The following “Soul to Sole'' conversation is the first in our new Feeture: Soulful Sundays. It’s within a “Soul to Sole'' conversation that two souls meet, and if only for a night, slip into each other’s (shoe) soles. Based on true events. As told to @janejane44

MsHeel.com | 29


HELLO

A lady walks into a bar; though it is a Sunday evening, the place is crowded, and it appears there is no place to sit. She turns to leave when she sees a sexily dressed young woman waving her over to the empty chair at her small table. The lady warily sits, removing her jacket and placing her oversized purse on the floor between her 3 inch designer heels. The younger woman looks her over with a barely concealed look of condescension. Soon a harried waiter stops and asks the lady, “What’ll you have?” She says, “Tea?” He sighs gustily, “Lady, this is a bar.” The sexy younger woman speaks up, “She’ll have a Long Island Iced Tea”- as she thinks to herself “Well, this could get interesting!” Drinks arrive and are imbibed, inhibitions are soon abandoned, and the two women begin to talk. Let’s listen in on their conversation... Sexy Young Thing looks at the lady’s glittering 5 carat emerald-cut diamond wedding ring. She thinks to herself, "I’d never wear that!’’ She then takes a sip of her dry martini and snarkily asks the lady: “How long have you been married?” “Ever wish you were single again?” The lady responds “Oh, I’ve been married more than a few decades. I always tell people I was a child bride!” Nervously giggling, she goes on to say: ”My husband and I were high school and college sweethearts; we both just assumed we would eventually marry--when we got married it felt like the natural thing to do; we wanted to be together. And nope, I have never wished I was single again! Hell no! But sometimes I’ve wished we knew then what we know now" (she blushes).

The lady eyeballs her table mate as she sips her ‘tea.' “Wow,” she thinks, “That girl drinks like a pro and dresses like a ‘ho.' She must be looking for a hook-up tonight.” She giggles to herself. And with that, emboldened by the drink she’s begun to swig, the lady asks: “What’s the best thing about casual sex?” A bit startled, SYT (Sexy Young Thing) thinks, "Oh, what the hell," and decides to play along. She responds: “There are no ties and no strings attached. I don’t have to answer to anyone about my whereabouts and my extracurricular activities. Sometimes you might even get a good friend out of it. I get to test drive new cars...aka--penises." Now the lady seems mildly shocked. She sputters: “Well, what’s the worst thing about casual sex?” SYT responds: “I hate knowing that my casual partner could be just as ‘cas’ as I am. By ‘cas’ I mean having honest and responsible multiple ‘relationships’ with multiple people. I want to know that they are as responsible and honest with me as well.” Wide-eyed, the lady asks: “Anything else?” SYT replies: “I can’t forget the gruesome afterthoughts...did I wear a condom? When is my period coming? I stress over if certain bodily fluids were symptoms of STD.”


HELLO An uncomfortable pause follows. SYT snidely asks the lady: “So, are you happy and fulfilled being with only one man? Or just content?” After a moment, the lady answers: “I think it’s safe to say any long term relationship goes through seasons. Have I/we had unhappy seasons? Of course; but we both have always been committed to the family we made together. During our worst times, when I contemplated leaving, it wasn’t because I didn’t love him, but rather because I didn’t think our relationship was healthy for me or our kids. We had to work through a lot of issues and it took time and lots of honest and painful conversation--but we did it and it’s been worth it. I love this man; he is my friend; no one makes me laugh harder, no one else has believed in me as he does. Don’t get me wrong -no one else can piss me off as much either! But that’s the nature of loving; you deal with the negatives because they’re balanced by the positives." The two women are silent for a bit; more drinks arrive. And then the lady asks SYT: “Casual sex may be physically fulfilling; how about emotionally? Ever feel lonely after a casual hook up?” SYT hesitated for a moment. This convo was getting pretty deep. Then she responds: “I was a heartless man eater in the beginning stages of my sexual life. I was physically satisfied with getting what I wanted (no strings attached!) from a man and making him beg for more...but yes, sometimes I feel lonely. I have no one to come home to. No warm body to cuddle up next to. No one asks me how my day was. It’s just me and my heated toys at the end of the night.” She pauses. Is that a tear in her eye? If so, it is quickly gone and she sarcastically goes on: “But the flip side? Being alone means I don’t have to shower if I don’t want to, or entertain someone--that freaking thrills me! And I never have to worry about who drank my expensiveass organic pineapple juice!”

The lady is nodding her head in understanding. SYT decides to ask: “Have you ever cheated? Do you think your husband has? Ever been a swinger or had a threesome with your hubby?” The lady is astonished by the bombardment of questions, but then volunteers: “The only time I contemplated cheating I realized it was less about desiring someone else and more about wanting to be seen/validated. It was a signal I either had to do something about what was wrong in my marriage or leave. I stayed, we got professional help for the issue that was destroying us. Look, we’re married, not dead! Do I notice other men? Sure! Does he notice other women? Of course! But no temporary attraction is worth betraying each other or our marriage. And No! No swinging or threesomes. We had friends who tried swinging; those marriages didn’t survive. The thought of a threesome--I can’t fathom it: for me, love, trust and sexual intimacy are interconnected. I’ll share books, clothes, my shoes--even my car. But not my lover...just not gonna happen.” The lady thinks for a moment; certainly booze has loosened her tongue. She asks: “Does alcohol make you feel more sexual? Take risks you might not otherwise take?” SYT is emphatic: “Yes to liquid courage! It also gives me the balls to say and do what I want and perform as my inner porn star!” Awed by such frankness, the lady asks: “Ever had sex with someone whose last name you didn’t know?” SYT reflects: “Yes. Sadly not even the 1st name. OMG, the whore-or, no, not horror-stories the walls could tell!” She shifts in her seat to signal it’s time to change the topic.

MsHeel.com | 31


Pic via Pinterest


HELLO

The two women sit in companionable silence for a short time; then the lady looks at SYT and concernedly inquires: “What about boundaries? Do you bring him home? Go to his place?” SYT acknowledges with: “This is a slippery slope. So much has changed over time. Where once it was seemingly ok to hook up at someone’s home, now people can be crazy; they have baggage, are plain disgusting...or let’s face it, can lead to really scary situations. But my home?” (she shakes her head) “I love my own peace--without catering to someone else’s needs, energy and feelings.” The lady leans over the table and places her hand over that of SYT and anxiously pleads: “ How do you stay safe? Protect yourself from STDs? Physically? Emotionally?” SYT asserts: “I have Mace and a knife; I always know my surroundings, drive myself to a destination, keep a charged phone and pray to God. Condoms are a must-have and I keep up with regular self-check ups and doctor visits. Emotionally? I happen to keep a bunch of men around to fill the missing holes of most men. I wish I could build the perfect man!” SYT plops her chin onto her fist. The lady looks slightly relieved. Quiet again descends as the waiter brings a last round of drinks…SYT looks slyly at the lady--can she shake her complacency? She asks: “How do you keep your man? Keep your love life spicy and him entertained? Is there chemistry during a marriage?’ Do you ever ask yourself, ‘Am I enough’?”

The lady is looking a little bleary-eyed, but her response is emphatic: “You know what? I can’t say I think much about keeping him anymore. Honestly, I think my man is damn lucky I stuck it out! When given an ultimatum, he knew what he had to do to keep me! As far as spicy-if you mean sex, that’s only part of the equation. We’ve always been attracted to each other. Always! For me great sex is dependent on mutual love and trust, friendship, passion for one anotherand a good dash of humor! Communication is really key too. And chemistry? Girlfriend, my man was a hottie! Still is, in my opinion! When you're lucky, the chemistry just gets better over time.” She thinks for a moment. “It’s not the quantity, but quality of sex that matters most. ‘Am I enough?’ Honey, I’ve known for a long time that I am more than enough!” The lady looks at her watch; she sees it’s getting late...but she wants to ask her new friend one last question. She looks intently at SYT and asks: “Sweetie, do you ever see yourself being monogamous? Or celibate in a relationship until you know you have a real emotional commitment? SYT looks pensive for a moment, then volunteers: “Yes, it's the best (I heard). I love being loved and I love love--which is why I try to fill the void with multiple men...but sometimes being loved, wanted, or needed is very temporary. Being with multiple men lets me see how full of shit men can be and I don't want the disappointment. I chose to be happier alone than with someone. Who knows? Maybe I will meet Mr. Right-but for now (as she looks around), it’s Mr. Right Now. As I said before, I wish I could build a man--one that checks all my boxes.” SYT thought about the celibacy question for a minute, then offered: “I actually did that for a year after a bad break up. Yes, 365 days! But to be honest, then a little single me comes out-and wants/or needs to play. A part of me is devastated knowing I lack the commitment tools, because for so many years I have been a Single. Sexy. Lady. And with that, the lights in the bar begin to dim, the new girlfriends pay their tab, gather their purses, and take each other’s arms as they stumble toward the door and their waiting Ubers, trading names and phone numbers. Privately, each woman knows they will never see each other again. Maybe knowing that (and the booze they drank), allowed them to be so completely honest with each other. MsHeel.com | 33


HEALTH

Enough of your syrupy lies. I now know you're not the real My Goodbye Letter thing and you never were. Oh To Fake Sugar Stevia, bitter on my tongue, you disrupt my metabolic flow. When you find this, I’ll be gone; back in the As sucrose, you gave me such a arms of my one true sweet. While I’ll never rush my vessels burst, my forget you and the journey we had, I am teeth decayed and my gums not sad to leave you behind. You fooled me were left swollen and bruised. over and over again, shapeshifting, always "Corn," you said, "is natural, trying to disguise your fakeness...but this try my erythritol." How bad time I’ve had enough. could it be? The headaches and the nausea were only the beginning as you tortured me with a swollen tummy-you left me stranded in the bathroom. "Give me another try," you pleaded, pink packet in hand. I was tempted by your offering and happy for quite some time. But with each sweet taste, I by Nurse Blu craved more. As a peace offering you brought me a new fruit - monk fruit. Not so bad, I might have stayed longer and enjoyed your taste for one more bite had you not so many times deceived. Goodbye, my nectarous darling, goodbye.

a pack of lies


STYLE

BACK IN

LO VE What's sexier than a well-toned back? In our opinion-NOTHING! That is why we're highlighting the one accessory to wear this Valentine's Day...make'em look back at it in a sexy lil backless dress. by Velicia Hill MsHeel.com | 35


STYLE

GAUGE 81 $284 bergdorfgoodmans.com

$43.50 lucyinthesky.com

$49 lulus.com

Versace.com $862

$19.95 Romwe.com

Mac Duggal $338 bloomingdales.com

prettylittlething.com $27

JACQUEMUS $633 frwd.com


HIGH LIFE

Love Potions Martinis, Mixers & Munchies O My! by @thesinglesiren

Tantalize Your Love On Valentine's Day With These Tantalizing Goodies.

MsHeel.com | 37


HIGH LIFE

Sexy AF are 100% alcohol free, plant-based, low cal, botanically infused mixers, perfect for a sexy AF mocktail! $33.99 each sexyafspirits.com

High On Love Dark Chocolate Edible Body Paint $35 Highonlove.store

Kama Sutra Honey Dust coconut pineapple kissable body powder $31.99 crazyhotlove.com

COPPER & KINGS HISTORY OF LOVERS ROSE GIN $33.99 totalwine.com

BigMouth Inc. Love Potion Stemless Wine Glass $7 Kohls.com

LOVE POTION DECANTER Pour your heart out $28 firebox.com


HIGH LIFE Martha Stewart Collection Valentine's Day Marble Heart Cutting Board for Macys $70 Macys.com VALENTINE’S DAY CHARCUTERIE BOARD IDEAS by jennifermaune.com

Deny Designs Heart Lollies Cutting Board $29 Macys.com

Spend the night drinking & figuring out this puzzlebrain power is sexy! $20 110 pcs by Urban_Lights/Zazzle.com

Beef Jerky Flower Bouquet Black Steel Edition $99 Manlymanco.com

BIG ORGASM-Libido Boosting Chocolate $13 eatgoldorganics.com

Meathearts $26.50 Manlymanco.com MsHeel.com | 39


W O N ! G A BLE M A T IL N I A R P AV

MsHeel.com | 43


HEALTH

What happens when it's too big? No, not a penis but your vagina. by Nurse Blu


HEALTH Short of porn images, we have very little opportunity to compare our lady bits with others. Contrary to common belief, there is no such thing as an average sized or shaped vagina. As a matter of fact, your vagina is anything but average--made of specialized tissues that expand and contract according to need--sexual (your vagina can adapt to accommodate a small or large penis) and biological. Considering surgery to change the shape or look of your pelvic floor? These surgeries can be helpful when the pelvic floor or vulvar structures have been injured; but before you book a surgery, let’s explore a little further. Significant variation is normal: from the shape of our labia to the size of the clitoral hood, variance in pigmentation and asymmetry--no two vaginas are the same. So when should you have concern that your pelvic floor may need strengthening? Here are some examples that could indicate the need for strengthening:

Lack of sensation during sex for you or your partner. Sex may not feel as “tight” once we are practiced, as we age, after giving birth, or following pelvic floor surgery or injury. In these cases, pelvic floor strengthening can help (don’t worry, we’ll talk about that later). There can be other reasons for decreased sensation during sex and addressing the root will be most effective. For some, the more stimulation, the less sensation. Circumcision can also result in decreased sensation for both sexual partners. In these cases, you will want to explore what and how to bring each other pleasure. Leakage of urine. There can be varying reasons for urine leakage, from stress incontinence (where you pee a slight amount when there is extra pressure on the pelvic floor - think laughing, coughing, jumping, sneezing) to a urinary tract infection. If you are having pain or experiencing frequent urine leakage, you should see your health provider to be sure that infection is not the cause. Feeling heaviness, bulging or a sense of dragging around the vulva or vaginal opening. This is a sure sign of pelvic organ prolapse. If the pelvic floor is damaged or weakened, the organs of the pelvis (bladder, rectum, uterus) can “sink” lower in the pelvis and press down into the vaginal canal and opening. While pelvic floor strengthening can help, you should visit your health provider for additional support.

So how can you strengthen your pelvic floor? Good old kegels, named for the male doctor who identified these exercises as a way to reduce urine leakage. But if you simply exercise the muscles surrounding the urethral opening (as you would if you attempt to stop the flow of urine) you could neglect many of the other muscles in the pelvic floor.

MsHeel.com | 41


HEALTH

Want to take it up a notch? Ben wa balls are small weighted balls that come in varying sizes and weights and are used to strengthen the pelvic floor muscles.

Diagram by Midwiferytraditions.com

See the image of the pelvic floor and notice how the varying groups of muscles seem to form an intricate bowl. When you engage all these muscles you should feel your vulva and vaginal opening draw inward and upward. It is natural for your stronger muscles to take over, so try isolating each section. Start with the more forward portion of the pelvic floor by drawing in and and lifting around the urethra and the clitorus. Now try to lift from the side of your vaginal opening that is closest to your anus (keep that ass soft). Finally, try to engage the right side and then the left side. If you pay close attention as you engage these sections separately, you may notice some differences in the strength of each area. You only need to spend a few minutes a day on pelvic floor exercises; start with 10 slow lifts up and in, holding each for about 10 seconds, then finish with 10 quick lifts and repeat a few times throughout the day. Focus a few extra lifts in any area you noted to be weaker. It may take several weeks to notice any difference in the strength of your pelvic floor, so don’t be discouraged.

Basically, you can perform the pelvic floor lifts previously described while the ben wa balls are in your vagina. You can start lying down and work up to standing while engaging and relaxing the pelvic floor. Ben wa balls can also be worn while walking but should not be worn for long periods of time. Just like any other muscle, you can overexert the pelvic floor so you should pay attention to your body. Let it rest between lifting sets; gradually increase the weights as you gain strength. As with anything you put in your vagina, make sure it’s clean, well lubricated, and vagina safe.Not really sure what’s going on down there? Well, take a look and take a feel. Becoming more familiar with your body will help you gain confidence and recognize when something is not quite right.


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HEIGHTS

We Have Proof! Read These Notes! by @TheSingleSiren

It w Dear John, You have texted me everyday to hang out for the past 3 months with no return reply. Have you not gotten that I am NOT interested? Or should I block u?

did you t u B . u o y ked Yeah, I bloc side my t u o d n a t S email me? note a h c a t t A ? roses house with , okay. h O ? o N ? n to a pigeo

asn' man t love, ipul atio just he avy nr. H. Sin

I'm not crying tears. These are all the words I dared no t speak. Now that it's over...the words are flowing freely.


HEIGHTS

LoveIt's n ot al l rainb ows and orgas ms!

e. So what? m o t g in r o Sexting is b ings you h t e h t ll a t I read abou d do to me an a n n o g e 'r u claim yo to find out h t n o m a d then waite e ps? Leave m m u p 3 t s la you the kitchen. g in n a le c 'm I alone,

First y f*cke ou f*cked d me me, t o v e r . It w hen you you w asn't ere s that p ecial No-I o r was lonely new. had t and I o hav e you .

Growth is when your ex isn't even your type anymore.

You w ere ju st a prete mista nding ke to be love. - R.h. sin

Does your wife approve o f us dating? Is she aware that you guys are separated?

MsHeel.com | 45


Y T R A P ONE? R O F

Com par e w it t y hu s!

@msheelmagazine


HIGH LIFE

Join us as we travel to some of the sweetest suites & hotels in the world-just in time to celebrate Valentine's Day with your sweetheart! by Tara Stravensky

Casa Malca Resort Tulum, Mexico casamalca.com

MsHeel.com | 47


HIGH LIFE Do you crave suites? What kind? Whether you prefer a suite with a glittering city view or an unplugged beachfront oasis, we have discovered 6 sexy suites-sure to satisfy you just in time to plan a sexy Valentine’s Day getaway. Sexy naughty wear not included!

Suite 5000 Mandarin Oriental Hotel New York

Discover luxury like never before with this 3500 square foot suite in the heart of Manhattan. With breathtaking city views, this 5 Star Hotel luxury suite features a Swarovski crystal hanging wall installation, dreamy bathtub and 3 bedrooms to choose from. Experience the magic of this urban luxury suite designed to make romantic memories that last a lifetime. $36,000 per night.

vixen legtyes $22 tyesbytara.com

Belle Atoille Penthouse Dorchester Hotel- Paris, France

Looking for something a little more chill? The two-story Belle Atoille Penthouse in Paris is a beautifully romantic getaway that allows you to experience the best of both worlds. With a beautiful view of the Eiffel Tower and a private outdoor terrace, you can enjoy 360 degree views of Paris from your own private jacuzzi. Ooh lala. dorchestercollection.com

Casa Malca Resort Tulum, Mexico invitation pasties $22 casamalca.com tyesbytara.com


Cove Haven’s Champagne Tower Suite Poconos Pennsylvania

Let's Toast To This Magnificent Tub! The Champagne Tower Suite has been doing Valentine’s Day right since 1984! This Valentine’s Day-inspired getaway features everything you would ever want for a romantic holiday. From a log-burning fireplace, a round king-size bed, to a seven foot champagne glass whirlpool tub, your Valentine’s Day just got a whole lot sweeter. covepoconosresort.com

MsHeel.com | 49


HIGH LIFE

Beach Front Master Suite Casa Malca Resort~ Tulum, Mexico

The master suites are directly on the beach, with an eclectic decor, which include original works of art from the owner’s personal collection. This entire hotel is a fantasy unlike no other. casamalca.com

honey nip tyes $14 tyesbytara.com

The Pretty Woman Experience Beverly Wilshire, Los Angeles Ready to be swept off your patent leather thigh-high boots by your "Edward?" You can have the entire Pretty Woman suite experience recreated by the staff--including a stylist to 'clean you up.' No price given, but 2 day stay required. fourseasons.com Mademosielle tye cuffs $22 tyesbytara.com

Sometimes you just want to unplug and get far, far away & wake up to the sounds of gentle waves breaking. The Four Seasons overwater romantic bungalow in Bora Bora will have you enjoying this Valentine’s day with a private pool, white sand beaches, and of course, skinny dips. $2500 p/n

fourseasons.com

ONE-BEDROOM MOUNTAIN-VIEW OVERWATER BUNGALOW SUITE WITH PLUNGE POOL

honey bra tye $28 tyesbytara.com



MsHeel.com | 53


HEIGHTS

pic courtesy of Pinterest

A LOVE ST RY

Shot by Kevin Schaefer


Rocking Bed by Manusindustries.com


Corset Panty MsHeel.com $16

MsHeel.com | 55


Showgirl boots by MsHeel $29


ove l y b d e d n i bl

bound toget her forever MsHeel.com | 57



MsHeel.com | 59


HEAL

Hi, my name is _______ and I'm a hopeaholic.

by Jane Garretson


HEAL Some of us might be familiar with the standard intro for members of AA: ”Hello, my name is-------and I am an alcoholic.” If alcoholism is the continued excessive use of alcohol (Merriam Webster), what then do I mean by the term ‘hopeaholic’? Hope is defined as a feeling of expectation or desire for a certain thing to happen. We might hope to get invited to a fancy soiree; we might hope for a cure for cancer or diabetes; we might hope for various societal changes. Certainly we are all hoping that a vaccine will eradicate the damnable Covid-19 pandemic! Is hope enough to affect any of these changes? Not likely. An abundance of hope may be the mark of a person of faith-this is true. And hope and faith most definitely go hand in hand. In fact, it is highly unlikely that a person without faith can remain hopeful. Hope and faith partner, so to speak. In times of trouble, some of us have learned ”to faith it ‘til we make it.” A wise man (OK, my husband) recently said of hope, “Hope without action is just anxiety.” That resonated with me; I think he is right. Hope without action is not unlike magical thinking--and we all know that gets us nowhere. To keep hope alive, we have to balance it with action. So what does that mean? Here’s a scenario (probably post Covid): a job change means relocation. This necessitates leaving a job you know, friends you love, the cute apartment you decorated exactly to your taste. You’re a little shy too. But that new job looks like a great opportunity and you’ve decided to take the leap. You hope the job is all it seems; you hope you’ll find another new, cute place to live; you hope you will be able to make some new friends. Will hope suffice here? Uh, no! You are going to have to take some action! You will have to learn all you need to know for successful performance in that new job; you will have to actively investigate the rental market to find a place you want to live; you will have to step out of your comfort zone to meet new friends--both at work, in your new community, at the gym. Hope + action = successful transition.

Listen...I get it--these last months have felt particularly hopeless for so many people: job losses, the illness and/or death of loved ones due to the pandemic- and loneliness! So many of us have felt cut off from family and friends...isolation leads to depression; we despair that change won’t happen as soon as we hope. Virtual hugs don’t quite cut it, that is for sure. Thank God for my dog! He loves all the hugs he can get! So what ‘hope-driven’ action can we take? Concerned about those struggling with poverty? I was able to make a financial contribution to an organization that helps those in need. I try to do that every six weeks or so. Feeling lonely? I’ve been trying to reach out more regularly via phone, notes or letters to others. I’ve had some great conversation with a cousin I hadn't seen in years. Struggling with lethargy? My Pilates mat, Elliptical machine and hand weights have gotten lots of use! Bored? That stack of unread books in my bedside basket is getting read. My neighbor and I have been taking regular socially distanced talking walks to catch up on each other’s news. Interested in a new career? Now is a good time to do the research to prepare. Moaning “Oh, woe is me, I’m miserable as can be” is certainly not helpful or hopeful. Remember, focusing on ‘lifting’ up others is often the best way to lift ourselves out of misery. When we are reaching out and expressing interest in the lives of friends, and maybe sharing laughter--that can make us both feel better. Jim Rohn, entrepreneur and motivational speaker said, “I used to say, ‘I sure hope things will change.’ Then, I learned that the only way things are going to change for me is when I change.” I believe that means that hope plus faith necessitates action to lead to change. There will be times when hope gets tired-- that is when faith has to take the lead. As I said earlier, “You gotta faith it ‘til you make it.” And as if I needed a reminder, I recently ran across a poster that said exactly the same thing! Just for today I choose to not just be a ‘hopeaholic’- but rather to act, based on hope and, especially, faith--even if only in one small way. Now I need to close-I am heading out to walk (by faith) with my neighbor. MsHeel.com | 61


COMING NEXT MONTH!

T T R R O O P P E E R R Y Y A A W W N UN R RU !! G G N N I I R R P P S S R OR F FO


Pic via Pinterest

One Last Glam Thang: There was no other couple more glamorous than Frank Sinatra and Ava Gardner. The two met while Sinatra was still married and ran off from a movie set for a date to a small town, where they got arrested for shooting out street lights and glass storefronts. The two loved jazz, booze, partying and each other passionately. They would get drunk in public and have huge fights. After some of their biggest fights, Frank would often try to commit suicide. They married in 1951 and divorced in 1957. When Ava filed for divorce, Frank slashed his wrists, hoping Ava would come back--she did not. Rumor has it Frank never stopped loving Ava and kept trying to rekindle their love. Every year after their divorce he would send her flowers. Eventually Ava succumbed to alcoholism and died in 1990 at age 67. MsHeel.com | 63



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