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What It

Takes To Build True Intimacy

WHEN LOVE GETS

LONELY! Are You With

Your Soul Mate?

10 RELATIONSHIP GAME-CHANGING QUESTIONS

SEX Do you want to make the most of love?

Is Your Marriage Good Enough? 10 Questions to Ask

Who Are You Meant to Be?

A step-by-step guide to finding (and fulfilling) your Life’s purpose.

Premature Ejaculation

HOOKUP ALERT: How To Tell If She Or He Has An STD?


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Cover

Stories Fierce the secret to finding a good handsom man in 2011.

30 When Love Gets Lonely!

865 Are You With Your Soul Mate?

678 THE M. UPFRONT.

6 8 9 13 16 19

Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced? Family and Children. How to raise financially independent children. 2011 Sex Factor. 15 reasons she has sex with you tonight. Save on your honeymoon this year. On a tight wedding budget? Try one of these five non-traditional honeymoons!

M. DATE MASTERY. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

M. DATE MASTERY. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Family and Children. How to raise financially independent children.

BREAKUPS & DIVORCES.

Sex

Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced? Family and Children. How to raise financially independent children. 2011 Sex Factor. 15 reasons she has sex with you tonight.

Do you want to make the most of love?

Save on your honeymoon this year. On a tight wedding budget? Try one of these five non-traditional honeymoons!

What it takes to build true intimacy

567 Cure Dealing with premature ejaculation.

345

Is Your Marriage Good Enough? 10 Questions to Ask

234 Who Are You Meant to Be? A step-by-step guide to finding and fulfilling your life's purpose.

234 Hookup Alert How To Tell If She or He Has an STD? JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 9


CELEBRITIES. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

WHAT MEN THINK. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

WHAT WOMEN THINK. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

COUPLEHOOD. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

BE BEST IN BED. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

NEED TO KNOW. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced? Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

WE HEAR YOU. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

WHAT YOU CAN DO. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced? Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause Divorce Factor. How I knew Eva Longoria would be divorced?

LOVE AND LUST. Happy New You. No more excuses. Sex Moves That Rock Your G Spot. Your Guide to a Better Sex Life After Menopause JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 9


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THE M. UPFRONT

1

I'm not as confident as I used to be but that's because I'm getting older. 'Age actually has very little to do with real confidence,' 'If you have good sense of self-worth, you'll carry it with you as you age, and it's far more likely to get stronger the older you get, because age brings wisdom. Besides, when most of us look back on our youth, we realize that although our skin may have looked a bit better and we may have been slimmer, we were actually far more unsure of ourselves than we are today.'

2

When you've been married as long as I have, you can't expect romance. This is misunderstanding the definition of romance, says relationship psychologist and author of Stop Arguing Start Talking Susan Quilliam. You may not get the same trill or sense of novelty anymore, but what you do get is a much deeper sense of romance that comes from really knowing your partner, appreciating them and being appreciated yourself.

3

I've never had enough money and I never will. Be very careful. Your thoughts create your reality. This means if you continually tell yourself you’ll never have money, you'll probably turn out to be right! However, if you can change those thoughts and create a more positive, proactive approach to money, you'll find vast improvements in your finances.

No more EXCUSES 4

My job is dull but I didn't do well enough at school to get anything better. You're not limited by the exams you passed at 16 or whatever age. You can do so much if you decide not to be held back by the feelings you had all those years ago. If you need to get another qualification or skill, then make up your mind to do it.

5

I'd love a new relationship but I doubt anyone would want me now. "Wrong." You're never too old to love or to be loved. You can have just as much fun and success romantically in your entire life. What you need is make up your mind to love again, and that's all you need.

How many did you tick? Whether you agreed with one or all ten, each of those beliefs will seriously limit your life - because they're all wrong! Here's what the experts says. JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 9


6

I've gained weight but it's middle-age spread- I can't help it. Gaining weight in extremely common and usually happens because we're less physically active but still eating the same amount of food-or something even more, says Dr David Haslam from the National Obesity Forum. But if you keep active and watch what you eat. Gaining weight can also be quite harmful (it's associated with conditions such as high blood pressure and diabetes), so don't be complacent about it. Instead, make realistic changes that you can stick to, such as cutting out sugar in tea and walking up stairs instead of taking the lift.

7

I'de love to love weight, but I've tried before I haven't before andand I haven't got the willpower. This is not about willpower, it's about fear, says therapist Emma James, author of Roble Diet. It could be you're afraid of failure that you don't even want to try, or you're afraid of what will happen if you manage to succeed. For example, losing weight might make you more sexually attractive. Be prepared to face your fears before starting another diet.

8

I've had the same look for years and I'm bore, but I'm too old or to change my style. It's good to know what suits you, and by the time we reach a certain age, most of us do, says Lynda. But you can still make changes around the edges. For example, I've had very short hair for 20 years and recently decided to grow it longer. As a result, I feel completely different. It's really rejuvenating.

9

My children don't appreciate me and they never will.

Ask yourself what you're doing that makes you feel so undervalued. Being a doormat is what makes them not appreciate you, says Lynda. And if you keep doing everything for them, they will keep expecting for them, they will keep expecting it. So the best solution is to stop doing so much. And remember, your children may not seem to appreciate your parenting skills now, but they will once they've parents themselves.

10

I don't understand new technology, so there is not point even trying.

Perhaps you're just not interested enough? if you don't want to use the internet or know the difference between an iPod and iPad, that's fine, says Lynda. But if you want to learn, don't be ashamed to ask for help. There are so many courses to choose from and many are free. Ask at your local library.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 8


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THE M. UPFRONT FOREPLAY TRICKS Here‟s something the G spot has in common with your nipple and clitoris: The more sensation that builds up, the bigger the release when you orgasm. Use these strokes during foreplay to increase your sensitivity slowly and lay the groundwork for a major explosion.

BLISS ON TAP

Sex Moves That Rock Your

G SPOT

The question isn’t whether the G spot existsdoctors have seen it on MRI scans- it’s how much satisfaction you can get from it. So take this guide (and your man) to bed, and tape into the insane pleasure it can provide. Ou may have heard about this headline-grabbing study: when researchers a King’s college in London asked around 1,800 women if they believed they had a G spot, only 56% replied yes. This then led to reports casting doubt on the existence of the G. Well, that didn’t over too well with us here at Mouithsone, especially since the most well- respected sexperts in the world have confirmed that the G spot is definitely real and that every woman on the planet has one. It’s finding it that can be a problem. So we took matters into our own hands and conducted an online poll of Mouithsone readers – and the results were more in line with what we’ve always known…

Y

Of the 2,000 plus of you who responded, a more encouraging 75% believed all women have a G spot. (If you’re part of the quarter who have yet to make its acquaintances will change that.) But knowing how to find this extra-sensitive area inside your vagina is just the beginning. Like your clitoris, the G can be incorporated into every stage of sex, from foreplay to orgasm, making what you already thought was an amazing experience even more passionate and intimate. By the time you get to the grand finale – the blended G-gasm – you won’t know where his body ends and yours begins.

A gentle two finger tapping motion against your G spot (see over the page to locate it) will stimulate the area and focus your attention where it should be. Try it yourself or have your man slip two fingers inside you and then tap your G lightly, alternating taps with each fingertip. ―The taps excite the nerves near your G over and over, so each one feels like it’s the first time you’re being touched,‖ says Yvonne K Fulbright, author of the Better Sex Guide To Extraordinary Lovemaking.

YOUR G- SPOT GPS One reason women have difficulty finding their G is that it’s hard to pinpoint it when you’re not tuned on. That’s because your G-spot is made from erectile tissue that hardens when you’re aroused. So fantasise about R-Patz, stroke your clitoris… whatever it takes. One you’re worked up, slide a finger into your vagina wall. It’s 5p- to 10p-sized and slightly puckered or spongy. Explore the front wall carefully, your fingertip curled as if you were gesturing for someone to come here. Don’t be shy about bringing in battery-powered assistance. Some vibrators, like the We-Vide (www.wevides.co.uk) are designed to zero in on your G, but placing any mini vibe on your front vaginal wall will help uncover it.

The Windscreen wiper. While tapping creates one type of tension, constant contact provides another that’s just as good. Graze your fingertip (or have your man gaze his) across your G spot the way a windscreen wiper swipes the glass. The side-to-side touch sets off nearby never endings and creates a spillover effect of pleasure around your G spot.

Gimme a „C‟ While spooning with your man, get him to insert one or two fingers inside your vagina and gently stroke your G. After a few minutes, have him place the pad of his thumb just above or below your clitoris, so his whole hand form a C shape. Encourage him to massage your clitoris while applying light, then firmer, pressure to your G spot as you become more aroused. ―The nerves of your clitoris extend all the way to your G, so having both spots stroked at the same time creates intense desire,‖ says Yvonne.

STORY CONTINUE ON PAGE 12 JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 9


THE M. UPFRONT GET INTO THE POSITION Ever been in the middle of sex when your man thrusts at a certain angle andHello! – a wave of pleasure that‟s different and deeper washes over your body? It was probably penis hitting your G spot. Don‟t just wait for that happy accident. These positions will ensure that his member strokes your G repeatedly.

G-spot joyride The best sex style for stimulating your G is women on top: you control the depth and pace, and tilting your body just back a little allows his penis to massage your front vagina wall. ―Straddle him, your feet flat on the bed, knees bend and pointing to the ceiling. Lean forward, hands on his hips for balance, and move your hips up and down,‖ say Yvonne. ―You’ll find what angle is best for you.‖

Behind you 100% Doggy style offers easy G access. Get on your hands and knees, your bum angled high. Keep your legs close together as he kneels behind and enters you. ―By keeping your legs tight, you restrict the vagina so it feels snug, and his penis stokes your G with each motion,‖ says Dr Laura Berman, expert in female sexual health and author of The Book Of Love.

Lap dance This position provides maximum closeness. While your man is cross legged, scoot onto his lap and ease his penis inside you, extending your legs. Have him hold your hips while you recline – you can grab his shoulders for support. The upward angle lets his penis stroke your front vaginal wall. With your bodies wrapped tightly together, says Dr Laura, you’ll feel incredibly intimate.

The Blended G-gasm We save the best for last. Lie face down and slide a pillow under your pelvis so it tilts up slightly. Have your man lay his body on top of yours and enter you from behind. ―As he plunges deep, his penis will stroke your G continually,‖ says Yvonne. Here’s the really good part: Have him slide his hand between your pelvis and the pillow to play with your clitoris. He should start off with slow stroke and thrusts, then speed up as you become more aroused. You should achieve a powerful, blended climax that’s the epitome of G-spot satisfaction.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 10


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THE M. UPFRONT

Divorce Factor

H

ow I Knew Eva Longoria Would Be Divorced?

While Tony faced the camera head on, Eva was turned towards him almost the entire time, so that you could only see her profile. She looked like she was ready to jump into his lap at any second. The last piece of evidence I have to substantiate my theory is the picture of the couple in happier times at a sporting event. Eva has her arm around Tony's shoulder. As they always say on Sesame Street, "One of these things doesn't belong here." That would be her arm. She was not letting him be the man, the protector, the instigator. Maybe because she was older she felt she needed to take the lead, but that was a fatal mistake. Men want to be the man in the relationship, even if they are dating an older woman. Men need to feel like men in order to remain attracted to their women. With Longoria taking on the masculine energy role in the relationship, Tony Parker turned to another woman with whom he could feel like the man. Having said this, I still think this marriage can be saved! To his benefit, Tony’s affair supposedly never turned physical. Eva needs to get back in touch with her feminine side and let her husband be the man in the relationship. If she’s willing to learn how to do that, I can almost guarantee they will not divorce. Eva Longoria will be fine. More than fine, in fact, says author and marriage expert Donna Estes Antebi. Why? ―Eva Longoria is not destined to be alone in this world. She’s a beautiful, fabulous woman and there’s a lot to be said for not having to live with a man you feel you need to put a LoJack on.‖

Before they were married in 2007, they broke up for a few months in 2006. In my weekly newsletter from Oct. 4 of that year, I wrote the following: If you follow the entertainment news, by now you've probably heard about the Eva Longoria/Tony Parker break up. Several reasons have been given for the split, ranging from age difference to Tony dirty dancing in New York last week with an old flame. I believe these are only symptoms of the main problem and that the real reason was Eva's behavior. As an expert looking at the situation from the outside, I can see that Miss Longoria seemed just a "little too happy to be there". It was always Tony this and Tony that. Did we ever hear him gushing? No. In an old interview which ran this weekend on NBA All Access, the body language confirmed my suspicions. JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 12


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FAMILYand

CHILDREN

4: Teach your children about budgets. At a young age, kids don't think about bills, groceries or rent. Not teaching your child how to budget could end up with them living paycheck to paycheck. Work with your children to set a minimum budget to cover the basics like lunch money at school. Whatever they save over their budget can be spent as they please. 5: Encourage your kids to carry cash.

How to raise financially independent children Making wise money decisions is important at all stages of life, but as a parent, teaching your children how to be smart savers and spenders could make all the difference as they transition to adulthood. Taking the time to apply some of these kid-friendly financial tips can help your child’s future attitude toward spending and saving money. Read on for these kid-friendly financial tips.

7 Tips to raise a financially independent child. 2: Put your kids to work. When I was 9, my parents urged me to get a job delivering newspapers. Try to avoid handing over money to your child without making them earn it.

Over time, this can create bad money habits for kids. Making your child get a job teaches independence and responsibility. If she has to work to earn her spending money, she'll think twice before she spends it, creating smarter spending habits. 2: Give your children an allowance. An allowance is a definite privilege, but it can also be a very beneficial learning tool for kids on how to handle money. If you are unsure what to give, take what you received as a kid and up it by 50 percent: $4 in the 1970s would be worth $6 to $8 now. Again, make sure to set guidelines and explain what the money should be used for, to help teach your kids about money. 3: Set your kids up with a bank account. Maybe they're earning money from doing chores, a part-time job (for example, a paper route) or receive money from relatives on holidays. Open a joint high-interest savings and checking account so they can begin to earn interest. This is a great way for kids to learn about money and finance. Transfer a bit of starting money to your child's checking account -- this way you are setting a budget while also making them comfortable with ATMs, writing a check, standard banking fees and other money issues kids will have to deal with.

With today's banking technology, it's so easy to stick with plastic. Encourage your children to carry cash. This will help them understand what things really cost, because they will have to hand over the actual dollars and cents. By using a certain amount of cash each week as a personal allowance it will help your children establish a budget and a spending limit. And in case of emergency, having $20 on you is a nice safety net in case your debit card doesn't work. 6: Do money-related role-play with your children. Don't wait for a bad situation with your children and money to occur. Create role-play situations where they can begin to learn the outcome if certain actions happen. One example: Your child spends his monthly budget before the month ends and asks for more money. Having your children know the outcome before it happens may keep them from blowing through their budget. 7: Set a good financial example for your kids. Always remember that every child looks up to her parents, and setting a good example is as important as teaching your children how to be financially smart. If you are not managing your own budget or are constantly spending and never saving, you can't really expect your children to be money smart. Teaching your kids about money means showing them as well as telling them. JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 14


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1. You're a Good Kisser

THE M. UPFRONT

SEX FACTOR

Your move: So what if you're not a hormonal 16-year-old. You're never too old for a steamy makeout session—in fact, a wellexecuted kiss could be your golden ticket to the main event. According to a recent study in the journal Evolutionary Psychology, women are far less likely than men to have sex with a bad kisser. Sounds easy enough, right? Not so fast, cowboy— her definition of a stellar smooch may differ from yours. The researchers found that guys preferred wetter kisses with more tongue action than females did. Here's what turns her crank: A partner who makes the first move, smells fresh, and caresses her while kissing. Oh, and pop in a breath mint. Women rated the taste of someone's mouth as more important when deciding to continue kissing than men did. 2. It Seems Like the Natural Next Step in the Relationship Your move: You’ve wined her, dined her, and wooed her, but still, no sex. The missing link? Commitment—it's key to sexual motivation in women of all ages, according to a recent study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine. Don't panic: It doesn't necessarily require a ring. Research has repeatedly shown that making personal disclosures signals investment in a relationship. In other words, sharing intimate details shows you're emotionally in it for the long haul, encouraging her to move forward physically. 3. You Caress Her Your move: Stroke her forearm first. This area of the arm is packed with pleasure nerves that respond best to a touch traveling 1 to 10 centimeters per second, scientists report in the journal Nature Neuroscience. These ―C-tactile‖ nerve fibers (also found on the legs and face) send signals to the limbic system, an area of the brain associated with trust and affection, says study author Hakan Olausson, M.D. 4. You Make Her Feel Sexy Your move: Establish your compliments safety zone. "Listen to the things she says about herself. Watch the way she reacts when you touch certain areas," says Chris Fariello, Ph.D, of the Council for Relationships. This clues you in to the body parts she's insecure about—and lets you know where to tread lightly. "You may give a compliment, but she can turn it around and hear a negative," he says. "If she's self-conscious about her butt, and you say, 'You have a great, round butt,' she hears fat, not great." When it comes to her sensitive spots, stick to universal compliments like, "Your butt looks great in those jeans." 5. She's in a Romantic Setting

The 15 Reasons She Has Sex with You. Remember when you first discovered sex? In your 6-year-old mind, your parents had done the dirty twice—once to conceive you, and a second time to crank out your little sister. Then, around the 6th grade, you realized that propagation is only a small part of sex. In fact, it’s just one of 237 reasons humans hook up, according to a recent University of Texas study. Although you don’t need a white coat to explain why you love sex, her motivations for sealing the deal often seem rather . . . mysterious. Fortunately for you, the researchers surveyed hundreds of women to pull back the sheet on sex.

Here are the top 15 reasons she sleeps with you, and how to, ahem, encourage her along.

Your move: You know the old cliché: Whisk her away to an exotic location, and you're sure to score. That’s probably true, but not for the reasons you may think. It’s less the destination, and more the shared intimacy of "otherness"—or of being outsiders—that sets the mood, according to a 2005 study in the journal Tourism Management. Book a trip for two to a foreign country, and prearrange a tour guided by a local, which creates a greater sense of intimacy and disclosure, the scientists say. 6. Your Physical Appearance Turns Her On Your move: Meatheads may rule your gym, but in reality, women prefer muscle definition over muscle mass, according to a recent UCLA study. When 141 women evaluated photos of shirtless men, they ranked lean, athletic-looking bodies as more desirable than both bulky and skinny types. Study author David Frederick, Ph.D., says that women perceive men with big muscles as threatening and also know that it takes time to build all that brawn—time you might not spend with them. "They're looking for signs of not only health and fitness but also a potential commitment," he says. To sculpt a lean, chiseled body, follow these 5 easy steps to burn fat and reveal muscle.

CONTINUE JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 16


7. She Wants to Feel Emotionally Close or Connected Your move: Start foreplay outside the bedroom—by raving about the free donuts at the office this morning. Sharing upbeat details about your day strengthens a relationship, say researchers at the University of Utah. Talking and listening ―helps maintain emotional intimacy,‖ explains study co-author Angela Hicks, Ph.D. The study also found that venting about stressful incidents didn’t dampen a partner’s mood. 8. She Wants to Please You Your move: If you’re striving for the Big O, start with the Big C: communication. "She may not have the sexual confidence to take charge," says Linda Banner, Ph.D., author of Advanced Sexual Techniques. "You need to let her know what turns you on." In a recent Boston College study, people indicated that talking about sexual behavior—sharing fantasies, turn-ons, and sexual dislikes, for example—resulted in both better sex and greater desire. Candidly chatting about sex helps her feel close to you, while also boosting her confidence in pleasuring you, the scientists say. The key: Initiate the talk outside the bedroom—79 percent of "unsatisfying" sexual conversations occurred between the sheets, the study reports. 9. She's Caught Up in the Heat of the Moment

12. She Needs Release or Feels Horny Your move: Propose a horror movie marathon. "Being scared is physiologically arousing, and in the right company, it may eventually carry over to sexual arousal," says Joanne Cantor, Ph.D., a professor emerita of communications at the University of Wisconsin, who studies the ways people are affected by media. After the movie, she may find your glances more erotically charged and your touches more stimulating, she says. If your date isn't into over-the-top terror, à la Saw VI, watch classic thrillers instead, like The Silence of the Lambs. 13. She Wants to Express Her Love or Affection Your move: Forget the elliptical, and ask her to hit the weights with you. A new University of Connecticut study found that resistance training increases free testosterone levels in women—a spike that also occurs when she’s head over heels. In a 2003 study, Italian researchers found that women who had recently fallen in love had testosterone levels twice that of non-smitten women, while a Canadian study found that women's testosterone also rises before intercourse. After your workout, reinforce her rising T with a sweaty makeout session: "Male saliva has 10 to 15 times more testosterone than the female's does," says Louann Brizendine, M.D., author of The Female Brain. "So prolonged French kissing may give a woman enough of a boost in testosterone to stimulate her interest chemically."

Your move: Even if she rolls over, it's not too late to heat things up. Sidle up and spoon her (without poking anything into her back)— cuddling causes her testosterone to surge, a recent Canadian study found. Increased T levels may cause androgen receptors in her clitoris to switch on, leading to arousal, the scientists say. Bonus: Women feel more sexually attractive the morning after cuddling, the study found. Steamy shower sex, anyone?

14. She Wants to Experience Pleasure

10. She Realizes She's in Love with You

Your move: If you hope to take her home, you better play nice—tough guys don't wow women, a recent study in the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology found. When researchers presented women with scenarios of men being harassed or insulted by other men, they preferred the guys that detached themselves from trouble. Someone spill your drink at the bar? Clean up, walk away, and slowly smile at her as you pass. Guys who let a smile spread across their face were rated as more attractive and trustworthy than those who flashed a grin, according to a 2007 British study. "Women see this subtle delay as being more genuine," says study author Eva Krumhuber, Ph.D. To reinforce that perception, tilt your head slightly sideways when you smile, a move that tells her you're caring, not conceited.

Your move: A big business deal going down in Tokyo? Don't hesitate to raise your hand for the job. Turns out, the old adage is true: Absence makes the heart grow fonder. A recent American Psychological Association study found that during travel-related separation, homebound partners’ positive feelings—closeness, meaningfulness, and mutual appreciation— declined, but then surged to an all-time high upon reunion. Just make sure to call while you’re away: Greater telephone contact during separation was key to minimizing negative feelings once the traveling partner returned. 11. She Thinks It's Fun

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Your move: Give her a massage to trigger blood flow down below—in her feet, that is. Women need to warm up their feet and feel comfortable before they’re in the mood for sex, a 2003 European study found. To truly sweep her off her feet, follow these 4 steps to a sexy foot massage. 15. She's Attracted to You

Your move: First, show her how fun you can be outside the bedroom. A recent study in The Journal of Psychology found that women were 25 percent more likely to consider a man attractive if he had a good sense of humor, and were 31 percent more likely to consider him a suitable mate. Try exchanging naughty jokes via email while you're apart—this adds an element of fun to your all-day foreplay.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 17


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THE M. UPFRONT


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DOUBLE | DATING.

Mistakes with Women That Screw Up First Dates

How to date your husband all over again?

Have you ever been so nervous on a first date, which by the end of the night you KNEW your out of control emotions had just BLOWN your chances with a great woman? Don't let this happen again.

To keep a marriage bond strong and healthy, it needs to be fed -- and the best way is for husband and wife to spend quality time together. That means dates! Sure, scheduling time for the two of you can be nearly impossible...

How To Be More Than Just Friends? Have you ever wanted to be more than ―just friends‖ with a girl? Read this article by David D. and find your solution it can change EVERYTHING in your dating life…

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 21


DOUBLE | DATING.

Mistakes with women that screw up first dates How Men Screw Up First Dates and How to Avoid Making These Dating Mistakes Men Make With Women. I get a lot of guys who write in to ask me how to behave around women. Many of those questions focus on the first meeting or the first date.

I KNOW that you can relate to this in some way.

I thought I’d share a concept that I feel is VITAL to understand if you’re wondering how to behave around a woman you’ve just met. A Mistake Almost Every Guy Makes

The simple solution to this is…

I’ve noticed a KEY difference between the way men and women act when they meet a ―potential mate.‖

The Answer

DON‟T DO IT. If you start acting all freakish and nervous when you’re talking to a woman, stop yourself and try one of the different approaches I teach on my eBook, ―Double Your Dating.‖

Women usually act in a way that can be characterized like this: ―You’re interesting to me. I’d like to get to know you better, and we can see where this goes.‖ Men usually act in a way that can be characterized like this: ―I am so interested in you that I’m nervous. In fact, I’m already thinking of you as a potential girlfriend or wife… or at least a one-night stand.‖ In other words, women are usually casual and laid-back when they’re first meeting a guy… But GUYS tend to act like every girl is a POTENTIAL WIFE. As you can imagine, this creates a lot of tension and pressure. And I’m not talking about the GOOD kind, but the kind that makes men shiver and shake with nervousness, and women feel uncomfortable because the MAN is acting uncomfortable.

If you spend a couple of hours having regular, normal conversation… being Cocky & Funny, enjoying yourself, and generally demonstrating that you could care less how things turn out, you’ll be FAR more likely to take things further

My favorite is to ASSUME that every woman has SOMETHING that’s going to annoy me, bother me, or SCREW UP HER CHANCES with me. The MAIN reason that I do this is… JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 23


DOUBLE | DATING. Lean back. Be cool. Make jokes about her screwing up her chances with you. Tell her that she’s a nice friend. Assume that she has qualities that are going to annoy you, then point them out (in a Cocky & Funny way, of course). Don’t lose your composure. It can be fatal if you do. Another note: Most guys don’t ―get‖ women.

The MAIN reason that I do this is… SURPRISE… BECAUSE IT'S TRUE! Duh. The fact is that MOST women are NOT compatible ―long term‖ with most men. In other words, if you do get into a long-term relationship with a particular woman, the chances are that she’s going to have things about her that you don’t like. One of my favorite Cocky & Funny themes to follow is ―You’re screwing up your chances with me‖. Let’s say I’m walking down the street with a girl to have a cup of tea. Let’s assume that she and I just met the night before, I got her number, and now we’re walking from my place to tea. On the way, she trips over the doorway or spills her tea. I might look at her, shake my head in an ―overly dramatic fake annoyed‖ way, and say ―This relationship just isn’t going to work‖ or ―What did I tell you about this kind of behavior?‖. In other words, I’m communicating the very OPPOSITE of ―You’re a potential wife.‖ I’m saying ―I’m so comfortable around you that I can even make fun of you without caring what you think of me‖. Does this sound a little crazy? Good. It should. But trust me. I didn’t develop Cocky & Funny ideas overnight… I researched a lot, so trust me. I share plenty of ideas like this one on my eBook Double Your Dating. After you read it and apply them, just send me an email saying ―you were right‖ and I’ll reply ―I told you so.‖

They look for tricks and ―pick up lines ‖when it comes time to LEARN how to meet women and don’t realize that all the tricks in the world aren’t going to help them if they don’t UNDERSTAND what’s ―going on‖. That’s where my eBook comes in… In it, I teach everything from the ground up on how to take things all the way from beginning to end… from the first meeting through the first date… all the way to the bedroom, and beyond. You’ll learn how to overcome your limiting beliefs about women… how to eliminate your fears of talking to women… how to make women feel ATTRACTION for you, even if you don’t have money or looks, etc. In other words, it’s a complete system. You’ll learn everything you need to know in order to start meeting and dating more women IMMEDIATELY. If you spend a couple of hours having regular, normal conversation… being Cocky & Funny, enjoying yourself, and generally demonstrating that you could care less how things turn out, you’ll be FAR more likely to take things further than if you act as if she might be the love of your life and you wind up acting so nervous, stilted, and DUMB that she runs away.


DOUBLE | DATING.

How to date your husband all over again Creative Date Night Ideas o keep a marriage bond strong and healthy, it needs to be fed -- and the best way is for husband and wife to spend quality time together. That means dates! Sure, scheduling time for the two of you can be nearly impossible, with creative with your calendar and pen in a date night at least once a month so you and your honey can take advantage of these fun ideas.

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1. First date re-enactment Walking down memory lane is fun, and it allows you and your spouse to reconnect to your simpler selves, before life got complicated. Revisiting the destination of your first date and all of the memories that go along with it will rekindle those pure, loving feelings -- and that can be a great marriage booster shot. 2. Themed date Whether it's an 80s movie marathon (complete with pigs-in-blankets and your best feathered hair), an international foodie afternoon on which you taste-test your way through your favorite country’s foods, or activities that start with the letter "B," you two will have a blast creating and executing a fun theme.

Then, when the time comes, go all out for your sexcapade: Think romantic bubble bath, wild costume, new toy and so on. Both of you will be anticipating this date for days, which will create the longest foreplay session you’ve ever had. 5. Seasonal dates Even in the most temperate of climates, the seasons change noticeably. Consider celebrating these changes with dates that pay tribute to them. For example, in the fall, go to a thrift store and try on vintage Halloween costumes. Come winter, build a gingerbread house. In spring, plant a garden, and in the summer, relax and unwind (or make out) under the stars at a drive-in theater. 6. Everyday date

Nothing brings out great energy between spouses like good ol’ fashioned playtime. So next Date Night, skip the heels and skinny jeans and opt instead for Converse and a ponytail -- because you are headed for an evening of bowling, mini-golf, roller skating or just simply doing the monkey bars at the playground with a sunset picnic.

For the couple who never has time to date, each of you should make a list of seven to 10 everyday things that you do, such as picking up the kids from school, folding laundry, grocery shopping, cooking, yardwork, walking the dog and so on. Then, swap lists and circle three things you would like to do together once a week (or biweekly, if that is more feasible). Mundane activities can become intimate moments when you include your spouse, not to mention probably get stuff done twice as fast.

4. Sex soirees

7. Hooky!

Lock and load your husband’s calendar with preset sex dates. These could be morning, noon or night, or even middle of the night… weekday or weekend. Indicate them with a capital S, a heart or something naughtier that no one else can decode.

Every once in a while, spontaneously skip out on work and every other responsibility in the world and just enjoy each other. Kick back and relax watching a few DVDs, take naps all day, camp out at the movie theater or just stare into each other’s eyes until the kids come home.

3. Childhood playtime

Time spent impulsively together can be more romantic than perfectly crafted dates. 8. Sex research This date is a three parter. First, head out to the bookstore and find a sex book that inspires you both. Perhaps it is one on the art of Zen or Kama Sutra sex, or maybe on aphrodisiacs. Whatever your mutual pleasure, buy it and then head off to whatever store -grocery, sex, natural food or otherwise -- to pick up the goodies you will need to bring the pages of the book you just bought to life. Then, head home and put your research to work. 9. Adventure road trip Pack a bag, a map, a cooler filled with favorite snacks, a camera and your sense of adventure, and hit the open road to who knows where! On this day-long (or overnight, if you can swing it) roadtrip, the journey is more important than the destination. Just enjoy exploring with each other, taking in the scenes and the great conversation. 10. DIY spa night Nothing says TLC like pure pampering. Prepare a deluxe spa right in the comfort of your own home, and leave no detail untouched. Include relaxing music, scented candles, soft lighting and all of the tools you will need for sensual massages, mani/pedis, facials, footrubs, bubbly baths and whatever else your bodies desire.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 26


DOUBLE | DATING.

“How To Be More Than Just Friends”

Say what? You mean that doing nice things for women, and trying to show how you feel can actually HURT your chances with a woman? Yea, it can. Look, if you've been dating a woman exclusively for six months, and her birthday comes… it's OK to buy her a gift and tell her that you like spending time with her.

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She Says She Just Wants To Be Friends. Learn How To Be More Than Just Friends From Dating Expert David DeAngelo For women, friendships and romantic relationships are two separate things. They are NOT the same.

You're Already In A Relationship. But if you've known a woman for six DAYS and you try this kind of thing, you're going to shoot yourself in the foot.

One can lead to another, but it's RARE when it happens. Remember that. While most men would sleep with most of their female ―friends‖ if the woman ―came on‖ to them, most women would NOT sleep with most men that they consider ―just friends.‖ But why is this?

Have you ever wanted to be more than “just friends” with a girl? Read this article by David D. and find your solution - it can change EVERYTHING in your dating life…

How do women differentiate between ―just friends‖ and ―I'll be intimate with you?―

If she feels that ―Ewwww Yuck!‖ feeling, then her ―logical‖ conclusion will probably not be that she wants to date the guy in question.

I believe that the answer comes down to understanding HOW women ―know‖ when they want to ―be intimate‖ with a man… and, even MORE importantly, understanding how women ―know‖ when they DON'T want to ―be intimate‖ with a man…

If she feels that ―It's Gettin' Hot In Here‖ feeling, then her ―logical‖ conclusion will probably be that this guy is interesting and attractive, and a good ―choice‖ to date. At this point she'll take ACTION on her feelings and thoughts…

The thing that tells a woman whether the guy she's with is ―friend‖ material or ―lover‖ material is how she FEELS. It's a combination of EMOTIONAL feelings and PHYSICAL feelings.

But don't let that distract you. Logic isn't important AT ALL in this context. A woman FEELS something emotionally and/or physically, then she uses those FEELINGS as the basis for her ―decisions‖ and actions with a particular guy.

Remember what I'm about to tell you. Write it on a sticky-note and put it on your computer monitor… SINGLE, ATTRACTIVE WOMEN WATCH MEN TRY TO WIN THEM OVER ALL DAY LONG. THEY KNOW WHEN A GUY DOESN'T “GET IT”… AND THEY'RE ANNOYED WHEN A GUY WHO DOESN'T “GET IT” JUST KEEPS TRYING AND TRYING AND TRYING.

So how do you trigger the “it's gettin' hot in here” feeling?

Keep in mind that single, attractive women watch guys do this stuff 24/7. They shake their pretty heads and say ―He doesn't get it… He doesn't get it… He doesn't get it‖ over and over and over.

Most men try to use gifts and compliments and being thoughtful to LET A WOMAN KNOW HE'S INTERESTED…

The point is that if you DON'T GET IT, then nothing you do is going to work for you.

…HOPING that when the woman sees these displays she'll be interested in him.

It is NOT logic. She might USE logic to ―rationalize‖ her decision… or she might USE logic to SOUND like she has a good reason for either ―being with‖ or ―not being with‖ a particular guy.

Women are EXPERTS at recognizing men who DON'T GET IT. And if you DON'T get it, PLUS you're trying to compensate for the fact that you don't get it with gifts and compliments, then you're REALLY screwed (or not screwed, as the case may be).

But almost NONE of the things men do to court women make women FEEL ANYTHING even remotely similar to ―Attraction‖ and ―Arousal‖ Of course, you know this. You've probably done this stuff about a bazillion times. I have, too. I know what it's like to try OVER AND OVER to let a particular woman know that I'm interested… only to have her NOT RESPOND in a ―romantic‖ way. The PROBLEM with this kind of thing is that it communicates clearly that YOU DON'T GET IT. It tips a woman off INSTANTLY that you're not hip to what's going… and it kills your chances with her.

The problem is bigger than you can imagine, and you're going to need to take a totally different road to get where you're going… Luckily, I've paved this road for you… in my eBook “Double Your Dating.” I take you layer by layer into the female mind, and show you EXACTLY how to trigger that gut level feeling of attraction… and how to avoid the typical mistakes that most guys make that KILL attraction. You deserve to stop being ―just a friend‖ to women in your life. You deserve to have the success with women you want, whether that means casually dating several women… or finding that one special girl.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 28


BREAKUPS & DIVORCES

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 28


BREAKUPS | DIVORCES "By getting therapy, joining a religious community, creating a new network of friends, and finding safety in ongoing relationships, women realize that their whole emotional life is not just about that one person," says Abigail Trafford, health columnist for The Washington Post and author of Crazy Time: Surviving Divorce and Building a New Life.

DIVORCE QUESTIONS

Extreme Breakups. What to do when your relationship ends in a horrible breakup. Most living, breathing adults endure multiple romantic fractures in the course of a lifetime, but only one actual heart-splitting, Richter-scale breakup. In its aftermath, devastation tucks you in at night and wakes you up in the morning. Your day-to-day world is thrown out of whack, not to mention the past you thought was fixed and the double-occupancy future you assumed lay ahead. Sounds awful? Yes. Lonely? Excruciatingly. Invaluable? Perhaps. In the wake of a lover's departure, the wreckage looks like this: There's no one else to make coffee, get the paper, or warm up the bed. Couple friends don't call as often, or if they do, the newly single are less inclined to accept invitations where they'll be the odd woman out. Weekends stretch out as vast, uncharted oceans of solitude. And even when the woman was the one to call it off, sadness bounces off the walls like whispers in an echo chamber.

The emotional threads that still connect you to the world, primarily through friends and family, turn out to possess amazing tensile strength, she says. They also serve as a reminder that your capacity for loving relationships is much broader than one person. "You're in for some wonderful surprises," Trafford says. "You see how much people care for you." The line between introspection and beating yourself over the head is, most of us know, filament thin, especially where love is concerned. In our culture, says Maxine Schnall, author of What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Stronger: Turning Bad Breaks into Blessings, the tendency for self-blame falls along gender lines. "Women are relationship oriented. The guy will walk away and say, 'She was a bitch,' and the woman will say, 'What did I do wrong?' But blaming yourself is not going to help." Anyone with a shattered heart can win the prize—a happier life, a better relationship next time around—but only by making use of the mess right there in front of you. You have to think about it. Feel it. Mourn it. Miss him, resent him, and wish you could tell him the funny thing you saw that only he would understand because it reminds you of that market stall in Oaxaca from your honeymoon. And if you do all that, really breathe the sorrow, and let the sadness frame each beat of your heart, you'll not only be able to let it go, you'll find yourself arriving at a new place, in which you know more clearly what you want and need and what you have to offer. So here are the real rules: Don't run with scissors, don't leave the iron on, don't cross against the light, and don't be afraid of a broken heart.

Calling on one's support system is essential not only for survival through the rough times but for keeping the loss in perspective.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 32


BREAKUPS | DIVORCES Extreme Breakups. What to Do When You're Devastated After a Breakup?

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Most of us have experienced the devastation of a heart-wrenching breakup. Moving on from a hurtful split can be difficult work, but there are steps you can take to make the healing begin. According to Gary Neuman, author of Emotional Infidelity, these steps can help the process of healing begin.

Ask For Help Now's the time to reach out to your friends and family. Don't be afraid to depend on others when you need it. Invite your sister over or take a walk with a friend—just be sure to get out of the house, eat well, and move. Doing so will get you to the next stage.

Use Your Time In bad relationships, we often tend to fall into patterns of trying to fit into the relationship instead of considering what our own purpose might be. Now that you're out of the relationship, use the time to reidentify and reshape who you are. Use your emotional energy to ask some of the big questions: What do you want to be? What do you want to do? If you don't have an answer, think about your dreams and talents from childhood. Those early desires might reawaken something within!

Give To Others. Do something kind for other people.

You might visit sick children in a hospital or help the homeless. Remember, as difficult as this time might be, your life is still valuable. There's a lot of important work to do, and a lot of people who you can help.

Educate Yourself Financially.

Create New Traditions.

A Final Word.

Use this time to get closer to the people you love, especially your children. Even if you need to be sad with them, you can come together to support each other. Try to create new traditions (like a regular movie night or volunteer time) with your family. Say to yourself, "In a year, I want to look back on this time and realize that I was changing my life for the better."

After a bad breakup, it's normal to experience feelings of sadness, loss, and anger. But if you feel yourself falling into despair, or you can't function, it may be time to speak with a counselor, minister, rabbi, or other trusted person.

A bad breakup affects emotions, but it also affects your finances. Go to the library and read books on managing your money. Feel secure so that you can create a financial future.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 33


BREAKUPS | DIVORCES

Extreme Breakups. What to Do When You're Devastated After a Breakup? Most of us have experienced the devastation of a heart-wrenching breakup. Moving on from a hurtful split can be difficult work, but there are steps you can take to make the healing begin. According to Gary Neuman, author of Emotional Infidelity, these steps can help the process of healing begin.

Ask For Help Now's the time to reach out to your friends and family. Don't be afraid to depend on others when you need it. Invite your sister over or take a walk with a friend—just be sure to get out of the house, eat well, and move. Doing so will get you to the next stage.

Use Your Time In bad relationships, we often tend to fall into patterns of trying to fit into the relationship instead of considering what our own purpose might be. Now that you're out of the relationship, use the time to re-identify and reshape who you are. Use your emotional energy to ask some of the big questions: What do you want to be? What do you want to do? If you don't have an answer, think about your dreams and talents from childhood. Those early desires might reawaken something within!

Give To Others. Do something kind for other people.

Most of us have experienced the devastation of a heart-wrenching breakup. Moving on from a hurtful split can be difficult work, but there are steps you can take to make the healing begin. According to Gary Neuman, author of Emotional Infidelity, these steps can help the process of healing begin.

Ask For Help Now's the time to reach out to your friends and family. Don't be afraid to depend on others when you need it. Invite your sister over or take a walk with a friend—just be sure to get out of the house, eat well, and move. Doing so will get you to the next stage.

Use Your Time In bad relationships, we often tend to fall into patterns of trying to fit into the relationship instead of considering what our own purpose might be. Now that you're out of the relationship, use the time to re-identify and reshape who you are. Use your emotional energy to ask some of the big questions: What do you want to be? What do you want to do? If you don't have an answer, think about your dreams and talents from childhood. Those early desires might reawaken something within!

Give To Others. Do something kind for other people.

JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 35


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JANUARY 2011 / MOUITHSONE | PAGE 35



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