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“5 Notes to Start Singing Your Life Song” by Dawn Dougherty

©2014 Dawn Dougherty Midlife Dawnings Please do not cite, circulate or copy without permission.

If you think of all the events of your life as verses of your personal song, there will most likely be parts that are not so positive, productive and happy. While you can’t change the past, you can re-frame it and change the meaning you attach to it to something that can work for you, not hold you back in fear or keep you stuck in a bad memory. With that in mind, here are five ideas that may help you move to a happier verse in your life-leading to a thrilling, enthralling chorus that builds to reflect you living at your highest and best.

1). Everyday eliminate 5-10 things from your home, office and car. It’s so easy to get weighted down in clutter, mail, packaging, and those things you don’t know what to do with. As you go about your normal activities when you see that outdated appointment reminder on the refrigerator, that piece of clothing that never looks right on you, the worn out pair of shoes, put it in the garbage and have a giveaway bin in your garage for those items that someone else could use. Once a month take the bin to your favorite charity. Your home will start to feel lighter, and it will be a little easier when you are going to actually clean your house. This is really easy if you do it as you go along in your day. Take a few concentrated moments in the day to do this. Every day you build progress and create a win for yourself. Who knows? You may be inspired to go deeper in an area once you get started as well. The effects will be cumulative in a less cluttered home and mind and the joy of being able to give your extra goods to help others.

2). Take those appliance manuals, tax records, sheet music and loose paper you want to keep and scan it. Put it in your hard drive---save it with a file name that will make it easy to find--- or even better yet email it to yourself and also keep a copy on a flash drive as well. You will get rid of even more clutter and more than likely be able to find those items when you need them in a hurry. Password protects any files you want to keep confidential.

3). Take a few minutes to really think through a situation that is giving you pain or causing you fear in another light. This is a great way to help eliminate negative energy. It’s not always easy, but it can pay huge dividends. ©2014 Dawn Dougherty Midlife Dawnings Please do not cite, circulate or copy without permission.

Start with something small, say being irritated with the service at the coffee shop. Can you examine the situation from the view of a detached outsider? What would someone else see? Would they have a different view of what happened? Would they be more or less upset? Would they walk away or detach from the situation? Would it be less important to someone else? Maybe looking at it with different eyes would minimize the anger, hurt, pain or whatever less productive emotion you are having with the situation. Another, more challenging way to look at the situation is through the eyes of others directly involved. What may have been going on with the other person? Are they sick, worried about a friend or loved one? Are they needing to be with a child or feeling financial pressure? Has their boss just given them a warning about their performance? Maybe you can observe a situation you are not directly involved with and see more of why the people involved react as they do. As you become more aware of the reactions of others, maybe you can see patterns and triggers in your own life. As you feel more comfortable with this go and look at more painful situations---the rejections you felt as a child or in a romantic relationship. Maybe the impasse of an argument with a loved one or the frustration of not feeling truly heard or acknowledged. Or that there is injustice in a certain situation? Digging deep to find the not so attractive (or so you think) parts of yourself your personality helps you to feel more comfortable with all the aspects of who you are and to deal with them more effectively. It’s ok to have parts of your personality that you don’t feel as comfortable about. They can be there to teach you lessons and help complete you as a person. It’s ok to not feel all parts of you are attractive and know you can still love yourself as you are.

4). Give up news channels, political blogs, Facebook groups and friends that are upsetting to you plus gossip sites, shows and things that upset you. Its soooooo easy to get sucked up in the over abundance of media and social media. Because there is so much of it, it seems that they only way for some to get attention is to keep getting more and more negative and combative. I try to avoid restaurants that have televisions in them (can you imagine watching or even just hearing that stuff all day?) and have eliminated many friends that I feel go too far in meanness or spreading negativity to boost their political causes. My peace of mind is too important. I rarely watch any news (except the weather) and trust that the proliferation of media I get exposed to without even trying to gives me a pretty basic idea of what is going on in the world. What I do like Facebook for and try to share is inspirational and humorous things. ©2014 Dawn Dougherty Midlife Dawnings Please do not cite, circulate or copy without permission.

I find its best to nourish my mind from various sources and concentrate on what makes my soul sing. It’s important to guide the gates of your mind against too much negativity. And purge negative energies when I can with yoga, meditation, etc.

5). Spend time everyday being quiet (and dreaming big as well). Even 10 minutes a day of meditation is shown to have amazing health, concentration and mental benefits. The focus gained can make you much more productive. Even being able to slow down your breathing slows your mind. It’s so important to have a big dream (or several) to keep optimism for the future and make your life the way you want it to be. Spend a few minutes daily dreaming of your perfect day (or days) and WRITE IT DOWN!!! It’s for no one else but you to see. Writing it down makes it more realistic and more concrete in your mind. Don’t censor yourself----go as big as you want. Anything is possible if you want it.

To learn more about Dawn Dougherty and Midlife Dawnings please visit

©2014 Dawn Dougherty Midlife Dawnings Please do not cite, circulate or copy without permission.

"5 Notes to Start Singing Your Life Song" by Dawn Dougherty  

Dawn Dougherty is the founder of "Midlife Dawnings." She is a motivational speaker, songwriter and coach dedicated to helping women have an...

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