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THE MICHIGAN REVIEW Volume 13. Number 13

March 29, ~ 995

The Campus Affairs Journal of the University of Michigan

Regents to Hear Code Amendments BY ANTHONY WEN


HE STATEMENT OF Student Rights and Responsibilities. also known as the Code. Boon may change. Unfortunately. it may not be for the better. On January 31. the Student Judicial Board considered proposed amendments to the Code. '!his amendment hearing occurred after three failed attempts to meet the 26 member quorum. The panel approved some of the proposed amendments and its recom· mendations recently were released. The University of Michigan Board of Regents will consider the proposed amendments at its April meeting. when Vice President for Student Mfairs Maureen Hartford makes the presentation. Many of the recommended changea do not alter the Code significantly. Examples of these include changing the word "co~~" to "panel" and modifying "Appeals Board" to "appeals board." Also recommended are numerous other word choice and grammatical changes. The regents. however, must consider some of the revisions carefully. One important amendment concerns the jurisdiction of the Code. Previously. any violations within 30 miles of campus were ~bject to a hearing. Now. offenses committed anywhere can be processed under the Code. Other proposed amendments put restrictions on the use of the Code offcampus, however. and state that offcampus violations must "clearly threaten the safety of the University community or the ability of the University to fulfill its academic mission.n The phrase "clearly threaten" is quite ambiguous, and the student panel or hearing officer will have jurisdiction over this definition, depending upon the type of Code hearing. The statute of limitations on Code violations, which had fonnerly been


Quietly Flows the Dean

The GOP's goal of reducing government may be laudable, but are its actions hetplng America?

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six months, would now be nine still cannot participate in the actual months. Also. a quorum of Student hearing and represent the student. Judicial Board members would be Several additions to the list of decreased from 26 to 21, presumably prohibited actions have been proto increase the chances that an amendposed. including murder. fraud ment hearing will take place. against another student or student Another proposed organization, and change pertains to the breach of confidentipresence of an advisor ality during Code proor attorney at a ceedings. Another student's hearings. A proposition would student would be "acgive students the companied by an adviright to "exclude eyesor or attorney who witness statements may act as a consultagainst [them] unless ant but not a reprethe student is given sentative during all an opportunity to meetings and hearquestion the witness." ings" as opposed to The most subpreviously "[l~~eing] Here resides the Board of Regents. stantiaJ. and potenadvised by an advisor • tially controversial or attmney for coll.lJQ1.tation purposes." . addition is the creation of an Advisor Essentially. this is not much of a Corps, which would be a group of change, since an advisor or attorney students specially trained in judicial I

board procedures. These students would provide optional infonnation and guidance about the judicial process to students processed under the Code. The Michigan Student Assembly (MSA) would administer the Advisor Corps. In recent statements, Hartford has expressed concern over the Advisor Corps proposition due to its possible politicization. It is possible that only some or even none of these amendments will be implemented. This is because the amendment process requires that all proposed amendments, even after recommendation by the Student Judicial Board, must pass the scrutiny of the regents. Also, the regents are allowed at any time to "propose and enact amendments" without following the amendment p~dute. This underscores the lack. of power that students possess over their lives here aphe University. Mt

·blaglo·· Host Hash Bash ByM!KEWANG


N SATURDAY, APRIL 1. people once again will gather on the Diag to participate in the noon-time celebration known as Hash Bash. Throughout out the years, Hash Bash has been the biggest attraction in Ann Arbor during the spring time. Every year, people from all over the United States come to enjoy the atmosphere and festive activities, such as small concerts and public speeches. Others with more libertarian views gather to call for the legalization of marijuana. Although marijuana use is illegal, people seem to care less about the la w nowadays and choose instead to have a little fun. But why Ann .A:rl>or? There is a very small penalty in Ann Arbor if one is caught with less than one sixteenth of an ounce of mari-

From Suite One

The Code amendments are now in the hands of the regents ; they should act to improve the u-M.

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juana (which qualifies one as a smoker but not a dealer). Police simply will grant a citation, and the offender only has to pay a fine. Hash Bash has become more and more popular during the last four years, since the "back to the 60's" trend has settled into the community of Ann Arbor and the University of Michigan students. The turn-out of Hash Bash. however, usually is influenced by the weather. If the weather is good, one can expect around 5,000 people spreading from the Graduate Library to Rackham. Captain Jim Smiley of the Detective Bureau of the Department of Public Safety (J)PS) has indicated that if that is the case, many DPS officers in joint with the Ann Arbor Police Department officers will be around that area to ensure the public safety and look fQr illegal use of marijuana.

Electric Snapple Acid Test

Mom, baseball, and apple pie versus O.J., Beavis, and CNN - you decide.


There will also be other activities that these officers will be looking for, such as t-shirt selling and seeking donations without permits on the Diag. Contrary to much of the spirit surrounding Hash Bash, Smiley hopes for "a cold, rainy weather" for the first weekend of April. Many who have been to Hash Bash would agree that it is a unique experience. It is certainly obvious that many people who attend Hash Bash only because it is an opportunity to smoke marijuana. It is unfortunate that many people do not realize that the purpose of this day is to celebrate freedom and to ,protest the illegality of marijuana. These protest have been and will be peaceful demonstrations. It is, therefore, important to realize that Hash Bash is not only a spring festival but also a political rally for legalizing marijuana. Mt

Interview: Robert Novak

The "Prince of Darkness" expresses his thoughts on the Republican Party and the 1996 election.


Living Culture

Charge up with Love Battery, relive 1980's "glarn rock," and explore the world of sex and drugs.

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March 29, 1995


o SERPENT'S TOOTH ~~,.· Documentary film maker Ken Bums will embark on a project that chronicles Lewis and Clark's exploration of the American frontier, it will air on PBS in 1997. The expedition of Lewis and Clark lasted approximately two years; the documentary is expected to be only slightly longer. Staffers in the old Democratic Congress reportedly were given last minute raises as "farewell gifts" bonuses that accounted for nearly $665,000 in federal funds . Geez, if that's all it took to get them offCapitol Hill, we should have tried that years ago. Proteetera from Women United for Equality marched in support of affirmative action programs in Washington DC last week. Serpent's Tooth suggests a more accurate name for the organization: "Women united for special favoritism programs that actually imply inequality." Aw, maybe it u. too wordy.

LSA Representative Seth Altman sup-

ported the MSA resolution denouncing the Leadership 2017 program. Said Altman, the program "questions the legitimacy of this iru¢itution." No it doesn't, Seth. MSA was never in danger ofbeing considered legitimate.

'!be National Endowment for the Arts tried to sway Newt Gingrich's opinion on cutting the NEA last week by sending famous artists to Capitol Hill in hopes of showing support for the NEA Among those stars lobbying were Kenny G. and Michael Bolton, two musicians who claim the r-.TEA greatly helped the development of Cleir careers. After listening to the music of Mr. G. and Mr. Bolton, a nauseated Gingrich immediately cut off all funding to the NEA. Ross Perot annQ\fficed that he will-' end his na1;ionilly syndicated talk. show in June. He will pursue other interests, he sald, like bugging the hell out of Americans full time.

Til L 1\11 (' III ( iAN

The campus Affairs Journal of the University of Michigan ·Keep yoor laws off our waUets!· This just in: Acrording to USA Today, 47 percent of Americans favor pie

I am much dismayed by your attacks on GOP leaders as of late. But I am even more d,ismayed with your adamant pro civil liberties stances. I wish that you and your fellow teeth would wisen up and realize that the well-being of our nation depends on getting rid of anyone who does not think like a good white male. We have no place for divergent thoughts or ideas in America. Kill the atheists, the drug users, and the homosexuals. Remember Sodom! Sincerely, Pat Buchanan GOP presidential candidate Dear Mr. Buchanan, I am sorry we are di.8appointing you with our defense of liberty. 1 gue88 we should rethink our stance. 1 mean, wouldn't it be great to have a nation that thought, 1oo1uuI, and prayed exactly like you . By the way, the POlIt office mistakenly sent us your KKK carcl. Pka8e pick it up, but don't wear the white hooded cloak this time.

During this month's unseasonably warm weather, many students flocked to the Diag, basking in the late winter sun. Unfortunately, they were driven away by a pack of obnoxious, foaming-atr-the-mouth men in white hats. You see, that week was also Greek Week.. Last week, political commentator and "columnist Pat Buchanan announced his 1996 presidential bid Let's hear it for tolerance!

Stoney the Clown was ticketed by DPS officers earlier this month for swearing in the Diag in front ofwomen and. .chil<iren.. All right~omen and c.hUdreri," don't read thH!:fudt.

In light of the Nike corporation's multimillion dollar deal with University of Michigan athletics, the Review presents the following:

but recently my dad told me that I shouldn't read your column because you use profanities. Can you stop using profimities so I can read you again? With hope, Li1 Jolulny Redd Ann Arl;>or, MI

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EOITOR-AT-lARGE: Nate Jamlaon EDITOR EMERlTA: Tracy Robinton PUBUSHER EMERITUS: Aaron Steelman : The AfchIgan Review is an Independent, bl-weekt( studerHun jotmaI of classical liberal and libertarian opinion II the liWersly of Mchigan. We nelller soIicInor ~ IOOI1eIaly donalioos from the UnNersly of Michigan, and have no respect lor anyone 1haI does. CorUibuIIons 10 the Mchlgan Review are laX..oeductable under Section SOl (e)(3) of the Internal Reveooe Code. We have no respect lor the IRS or any other govemmerdal agency. We also have no respect lor whomever stole 01.1 Vlctollan cIlp-art book (DR - TIis means yooI). The Reviewia I'd alliated with any political party or university poIHIcaJ group.


UnI/gnId edbIak . . . . . lie opinion d !he dtriaJ boIId. Ergo. by .,e uneqLW~ coned Yoo needn' atI~ \0 <l$proye the logic thal went lito their lormation, lor you cannot. Signed articles and cartoons represent the opinions of the author and I'd necessartt those of the Rlwlew. The opinions presen&ed In tI1s pOOlcalion are I'd necessastt those of the adveftlsefs or of the Universly of t.4ich1gan. We welcome lellers and articles and encourage comments aboti the jOI.InaL

Please address at ~ Inquiles to: Publisher, c/o the AfchigMl Rev/Bw. All advertising Inquiries should be difeded to: Publisher clo the Afchigan Review.

10. Your professor calls himself "Air."

editorial And 8U1ineee otrlcel: Sub One 111 N. Unlvll'llty Avenue AM Arbor, MI 4810i-1265

8. Sign over the Fleming Building that says, "Just Dude It!"


Tel. (313) 662-1108 Fax(313)13S-2505 ~IO'''' b¥ 'IlII1oIIctAgIII ___ ...... 1nc. AI~.

7. TA selection criteria based on field goal perecntage. 6. Tuition checks payable to "Nike."

Peace, Serpent's Tooth

5. Last week the DPS ao:osted you for wearing Reeboks.

Dear Serpent's Tooth, I read the Daily , and I must admit, they are much nicer than you. Why do you have to be so insensitive. Isn't there enough pain in the world? You should be ashamed of yourself Billy Ocean

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STAFF: Bill Ahrens, Geoff Brown, Jf/ft Gordon, Ben· jamln Kepple, Brian Marcus, Ryan Posly, Rodeen Rahbar. David Ray, Meghan Roekle•. Ken Sleroma, Joah Tumer, Mike Wang, Anthony Wan, Mark West


9. The syllabi for all your classes are entitled, "What ya gotta do before you wear the shoes."

Dear Li'l Johnny, We try not to use profanities but sometimes we fuek up. I think you should tell your daddy that you are collecting his paycheck and redi.8tributing it to your aUowance..

Be like Billy Ocean. Write Serpent's Tooth care of the Review. Or e-mail Dear Serpent's Tooth, him at "" May the I read your column every week,. ... force b6 with you, .g~ntle.reo.deNl.


EDITOR-IH-CHfEF: ...". A. RobertI, H PUBLISHER: Eric LaI'lOl'l MANAGING EDITOR: Greg Parbr FEATURES EDITOR: DeIn Bal!.opolla

graphs, 20 percent favor line graphs, and ten percent are partial to bright and colorful graphics. The remaining MUSIC EDITOR: Drew Peten 23 percent of Americans were listed , ASSISTANT EDITORS: Gene Krau, Mohan Krllhnan as "undecided, confused, or too bloody , ILLUSTRATOR: Brian O'Keefe PHOTOGRAPHER: Lisa Wagner drunk. to answer."

Letters to Serpent's Tooth Dear Serpent's Tooth,

RL V II :\\'

4. Steve Fisher and Gary Moeller replace the Board of Regents.

3. Nike releases knew line of "Air Birks." 2. Number one frat pick-up line: "Wanna play one-on-<>ne?" I


11. Two words: ~

Ombudsman Jor-

Jake Baker Watch: As recently reported in the Michigan Daily and the Ann Arbor News, Jake Baker was amrigned on Friday, March 24, in US District Court. The charges included five counts of transmitting threats, via the Internet, to injure or kidnap another individual. Baker pleaded not guilty to these charges. As with all violations of civil liberties, the Review will provide insight and analysis with any new developments. ~

March 29, 1995




Forty Year:~ in 100 Days BY DEAN BAKOPOULOS


LONG TIME, 40 YEARS. IT is a long time for Democrats to control Congress, but for the 40 years prior to what Rush Limbaugh tenned "Operation Restore Democracy," that is exactly what occurred. '!he liberal slant of the Congress for the last 40 years has constructed a mammoth federal government, full of unnecessary bureaucrats and programs. Programs that disregard individual rights, free market theories, and quite often, the Constitution. Thus, in November, the new Congress inherited a bloated government, and, as outlined in the "Contract with America," the new Congress plans to trim the fat of Big Daddy State. But the swinging battle axes of the Republican Revolution have been moving ferociously in the first 100 days; and to a country which has established a govemment-dependent populace, the swift antics ofSenate Republicans, although seemingly good to the theory of limited government, may be overly harsh and hasty. It seems obvious that one cannot undo 40 :years of government ineptitude in 100 daya~ but the GOP leaders are attacking the nation's federal programs full force, with little regard to the consequences of their actions. Their "bold" actions are frightening because, although the government must be cut, the Republicans seem to be doing it a8 a power trip - sort of like a new kid onthe playground who has defeated the .ld bully and is now recklessly trying to right the wrongs ofhis predecessor. Two examples of the Republicans' slash and bum tactics are in the areas of welfare and Social Security. These two programs have escalated into enormous, mone~ucking, and mismanaged entities, but the unfortunate truth is that mplions of Americans are dependent on funds from these sources. Congress must understand this; it would be ideal if we could simply dissolve these programs. But with an enormous welfare state and an aging population, simply cutting the programs will not work. Both parties must work together towards a gradual reform of these programs. Similarly, funding for educational programs aumot simply be done away with, or transferred into the mysterious world of "block grants." '!he hard truth, despite the outcry from Limbaugh and other conservative mouthpieces, is that many kids get their best meal of the day at school. In fact, I would venture to guess that the prospect of a free meal is what keeps

some kids in school. Republicans also wish to do away with the federal college loan systems, including Clinton's Direct Loan Program. Students have grown up thinking that they can get government distributed loans to help them realize their dreams of reoeving a higher eduCation. In an ideal free market, such government programs would be unnecessary; and someday, they might be. But one cannot overlook the fact that this has become a government-dependent nation; and a hasty slash and bum of government programs will be detrimental to many poor, ill, young, and old Americans. The Republicans have to be commended for their plans to cut the National Endowment for the Arts, the National Endowment for the Humanities, and Public Broadcasting Systems; though these organizations arguably have helped to produce some intelligent and meaningful art in ~ country, they also are mismanaged . and highly bureflucratic. Americans .. must realize that these worthy organizations have not changed the American attitude toward art; as a nation we still our culturally bankrupt and intellectuallyba:rren. '!be government could spend trillion8 on the aforeman· tioned programs; we'd still watch Jenny Jones and read Danielle Steele. The Republicans' concern with affirmative action also is noteworthy. Affirmative action, by granting special status to certain groups, is unconstitutional. Hiring should be done solely on the basis of the best qualified individual; not which individual may have oppressed ancestors. 'Illis quest for a '"multicultural" country is futile; we have been a multicultural nation since 1776. But despite these good points, the GOP takeover of Congress seems flawed. Another curious aspect of the Republicans' "Contract" is its insistence on decreasing individual welfare but little mention of corporate welfare. Government handouts of any kind are wrong, whether they go to an urban family or a corporation. But government handouts are a reality, albeit an unpleasant one. We must deal with cutting government programs realistically and yes, (that liberal buzz word, label me a communist if you wish) compassionately. If the GOP is so adamantJ.y supportive of cutting the size of government, it seems odd that they have become bedfellows with the folks of the Christian Coalition. Though it seems to argue differentJ.y, the Christian Coalition's goals seem to expand the influence of the federal government. It wishes todo this by estap.

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lishing a government that sets moral parameters for its constituents. With its tirades against homosexuality, drugs, and abortion, the Christian Coalition is not merely expressing its views, but, by such antics as demanding the GOP nominate a pro-life can-

with the Republican Party. As a Christian, I see the CC as an organization that has forgotten many of the words of Christ, the man whom it claims to follow. Instead of expressing tolerance like Christ when he said, "Let he who is without sin cast the first stone," the Christian Coalition establishes itself as the guardian of American morality, condemning and criticizing any views it deems "immoral." (Ironically, some of Jesus' mends were prostitutes, drunks, and thieves.) Well, no thank you, Ralph Reed and friends, my relationship with God is my personal business. If the Republicans are indeed serious about limiting government, they should start by booting the hypocritical Christian Coalition out of our lives. Indeed, in a free market and a democratic nation, founded on the principals of individual rights, free• No one can stop • runaway Republican. dom, and li.berty, many of the prodidate, the . CC is showing that by grams Republicans are attacking gaining political influence, it wishes antithetical to the concept of freedom. to dictate the private lives of AmeriBut, ultimately, the Republicans cans. This isa frightening threat to would be wise to proceed with cau· the ideas of civil liberties. Even more tion: you cannot undo 40 years in 100 mghtening is the alliance the CC has., . days. Ml.


Friel1dly, Free Delivery






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605 Church St, Ann Arbor.

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741- 8296





March 29, 1995


Regents Must Fix Code


PSrWEEK, AFrER A '!WO MONTH DELAY, THE UNIVERSI'IY OF Michigan's Office of the Judiciary finally released the Student Judicial Board's reoom.mended revisions to the Statement of Student Rights and Responsibilities, also known as the Code. These recommendations are now pending review by the Board of Regents. In light of this step in the amendment process, the Michigan Review proposes that the regents take action concerning the following recommendations: -Strlk.lng the word "physical' from the Code's description of "physical assault. " Striking the physical from the description of assault at most makes this portion of the Code ambiguous at best. The Review fears that this modification merely paves the way for a speech code. The ambiguity of this propoaalleaves it open to a wide variety of interpretation by a student judiciary largely untrained in law. What is assault? Is verbal abuse assault? There is a fine line here, and the Review finds it hard to trust the administration, or a student judiciary panel, in the application of this proposed amendment. -Addition of the right to "be accompanied by an advisor or attorney who may act as a consultant but not a representative during all meetlnp and hearings." While the Review believes that the Code should allow full legal representation, this amendment is a step toward that goal after all, a little legal representation is better than none at all. Being that a Code trial has a significant affect on a student's academic career, this seems only a logical amendment to the Code. - Addition of the Advisor Corps as "an optional resource providing information and/or guidance about the studentj'VJicial process." The Advisor Corps would consist of ten students trained in judicial boaoo proeedure. This provision is a wise addition to the Code, but if and only if it is passed in coIVunction with the above amendment that student has the right to be a<lCOID.panied and oonsulted by an attorney. 'This way, an individual would be guaranteed either profeasiona11egal accompani.r:ri.ent and advisorY or at least trained Advisor Corps expertise. Then, financial constraints would have a smaller affect on the outcome of a Code procedure. Since students making up the Advisor Corps would be appointed by the Michigan Student Assembly (MBA), it is assumed that these students will have an active interest in the Code. In short, the Review recommends this amendment as a necessary evil in the application of the Code. -Striking and changing the "30 mile proviso" into a nearly inimite radius. This amendment is, simply put, asinine. While the amendment recognizes the fact that most actions away from the U-M community will be nearly impossible to monitor and/or prosecute, it still leaves the University the ability to do so~ Instead of the "within 30 miles of campus" that it replaces, however, the proposed amendment, by deletion, extends this "radius of prosecution" infinitely. For the University to pursue violations outside its community is a mindless extension of power that will only be inefficient and expensive to undertake, not to mention abusive of civil liberties. -Addition of lifting emergency suspension of a student if the given charges are dismissed by authorities or the student is found to be not guilty in the court of law. The Review believes this is simply a common sense addition to the Code. While this proposal certainly will not ensure the elimination of double jeopardy·under the Code, it does lessen its probability. -Changing the minimum number of student judicial panelists required for an amendment hearing from 26 to 21. This seems logical, considering the fact that the University had so much trouble gathering 26 of the student judiciary panel members. The Review, however, does question leaving the fate of the all-powerful Code in the hands of a small number of the students. -Allowing for the right to an open hearing, unless the complaint does not allege sexual assault or sexual harassment. First of all, adding "sexual" to the description of "sexual harassment" is only logical, after the discrepancy of this part of the Code that took place under the WelchlLavie hearings. Also, this proposed amendment allows for open hearings, regardless of the parties involved. The Review deems this an essential part of a trial - the right to have it open to the public. It allows for the monitoring of the trial by outside sou.rces; it acts as a "check." on the University's judicial process under the Code, which, frankly, needs all the "check" it can get. While the Review firmly believes that the Code, or any form of nonacademic composed by the University, should be abolished, the above amendments are a necessary evil in ensuring that the current Code is applied somewhat fairly. Let u.s hope that the regents act wisely in choosing amendments for the Code - the civilli~rtieg ofgtudents weigh heavily in the process. Ml.


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End Corporate Welfare


ELFARE IS A. W.E.L . L-KNOWNINSTITUT.ION. T. HE government collects money from all of the taxpayers and distributes . . it to those who are in need, aooording to the State. '!he "Contract with . America" is well-known too, and it seems to be decidedly against welfare. From school lunches to medical benefits, from social security to subsidized housing, the GOP seems to be on an anti-welfare rampage of epic proportions. These are programs it has pegged as "pork-barrels" in the quest to make government more streamlined. Oddly enough, it has been very cautious to downsize the most bulky parts of government, such as the military. In addition, it refuses to justify the reasoning behind many of its specific cuts, as it is unwilling explain why programs such as school lunches are any more illegitimate than social security or famring subsides. To make matters worse, the results of these cuts demonstrate that the GOP managed to salvage only little money in proportion to the budget deficit, while the list of programs that it scrapped or cut was extensive. M~anwhile, the GOP is continuing its pro--business philosophy by offering tax breaks, incentives, and subsidies to businessmen and corporations. Traditionally, its claim has been that this "corporate welfare" indirectly will aid the same people that welfare seeks to aid. If this is still the case, then the Republican party is acting quite hypocritically. Ifit truly believes that welfare programs are excessive and that Congress must sacrifice them to cut the budget, then the GOP should cut all welfare programs equally, instead of shearing only the direct ones, such as subsidized housing. In the context of the "Contract with America," this is even more ironic. The contract is supposed to bring the Republican Party closer to the working class voters who often have held stronger ties to the Democratic Party. As far as corporate welfare is concerned, the contract continues to favor corporations over the working class, continuing the party's long-standing procedure. One must ask if, in fact, these cuts in welfare are less of an earnest attempt at downsizing government and more of another ploy to gain the support of businesses for the GOP. If the "new" Republicans are really interested in improving government, then their cuts should be unilateral, and should be based on the political beliefs of the people who voted for them in the last election. Right now, these acts seem more like those of career politicians than of real innovators. For instance, while the GOP made an effort to pass the Balanced Budget Amendment, the amendment itBelflacked coherence and conviction. The lone GOP dissenter, Mark Hatfield (R-Oregon), voted against it not because he disagreed. with the bill itself, but because it was unclear with respect to programs such as Social Security. In the end, if the Republican Party wishes to be the party of the American people, it should drop these double standards in favor of unilateral, coherent initiatives that match the desires of the Americans with whom its contract w~s made in the first place. Ml. - Mohan Krishnan







Pii · !2A" . IIi'", · ,A



4. •

March 29, 1995







OM, BASEBALL, AND apple pie. Americana. Ah, yes, I can see it now: It's the weekend, Dad rests on his hammock, listening to the ball game; Sis skips rope on the back patio; Junior begs Dad to play catch; Mom is ever happily working in the kitchen, baking the proverbial apple pie. Soon, the family gathers round the dinner table and enjoys a nice, hearty meat,...andpotatoes meal. Of course, after Mom does the dishes, the fiunily relishes in the orgasmic splendor of her apple pie. After that, the kids go to sleep, and Mom and Dad stay up to plan the backyard fallout shelter, after which they retire to separate beds. 'Ihls corny depiction of 1950slife once represented the essence ofpoputar America. More aCCUl'8.tely, it was Americana. It was the lifestyle everyone was supposed to live. It was the lifestyle everyone wanted to live. It was the lifestyle that led to the 19608 counterculture, complete with free love, free drugs, and social protest. Basically, then, Americana was a middle class pip&:-drea.m. This should not belittle Americana's importance to a decade - it represents the character of a generation. Americana symbolizes a generation. Whether these symbols are good or bad is beside the point. 'The fact remains that the symbols do exist, and I think that they speak volumes on the attitudes, expectations, and beliefs of each generation. 'fhat's exactly {vhy 19508 Americana seems so cheezy now. This is because culture has evolved immensely from this draconian view of gender roles and class expectations. With the ba.seball strike and women's empowerment, it's safe to say that modern culture completelyannihilates the 19508 version of Americana. But I maintain that every generation has its own version of Americana, no matter how distorted its version is. While 1960s Americana included Camelot and Civil Rights and the American Dream, 1970s Americana included ... well, let's just skip to the 19808. In this decade Americana was Conservatism and Computers and Prosperity. But the legacy of Americana, for whatever it's worth, has left us with a rather motley lot of symbols for the 1990s. As far as I know, no one has sat down and determined 1990s AmeriGnw Par1ter is a ravi1l8 nat"icnalist, and /wid better not catch you bumi1l8 a draft card or a flag.

Pie, :~Baseba1l,

and CNN

large role in determining what our cana. Here's some of what we have to We shouldn't necessarily be proud culture deems important. informawork with: Pat Buchanan, the Gulf of O.J., or Kurt Cobain, or meaningtion is responsible for the shift away War, CNN, O.J ., Kurt Cobain, less sex. We can be proud of this from 19508 values like Mom and apple Nintendo, Clinton, Newt, Pearl Jam, transcendent information. Nowhere, pie to more media-i.zed events. Let's Gen X. the Internet, cyberspace, AIDS, ever, in the history of the world, has not kid ourselves: just as much hapdysfunctional families, race, gangsta such vast amounts ofinfonnation been pened in the 1950s as does today. It's rap, the baseball accessible to so many just that with the increased role of strike, Beavis and people, via the Internet. Butt-head, Forrest Directly related to this media because of the newfound emphasis on information, more people Gump, Pulp Fiction, is the amount of discusknow more about the events. 'The inBridgell Over Madison sion that occurs on comcreased coverage of these events takes County, meaningless puters - everything the place of apple pie. No longer does sex, the Soviet from sex stories to maMom tell Junior about the birds and breakup, World Trade rine biology to existenCenter bombings, tialism. With the adthe bees. He sees it on TV. Geraldo, retro, postvent of C~ROM, comWhen some future, post-modemmodernism, post-Cold plete encyclopedias are ist pseudo-intellectual envisions the War, the pseudoavailable in a package 1990s, I'm sure he'll think of Beavis American Dream. a thousand times and Gen X and Nintendo. But when I think of the 1990s, I'll thinkofinforAll right. Let me smaller than a full set mation. 111 think of the first time I see here ... the 1950s of the behemoth texts. led to "Mom, baseball, CNN supplies headline logged on the Internet, and the first and apple pie." I guess news round-the-clock, time I sat down to a desktop computer that the 1990s, aooord24 hOur&-a-day. think. to use a set of encyclopedias. of -watching nearly every'niE\jar worldingly, should be "O.J ., It isn't as if Beavis Beavis and Gen,..¡X," and the like are repreevent on television - 111 say that I What happened 10 filmWould you like a slice of sentative of our culture didn\ merely Jearn about these events, ily? What happen~to Uberty's pie? - it's simply that with but I observed 'them; I lived them, I W:'HI there. So say what you want food? What happened to morality? the emergence ofinfonnation as a key We've got O.J . as the grand marshal motivator, the media have to playa about Americana. I like it. Mt ofhis own parade,. withQO eo:p~as floats. We've got two pre-pube8cent cartoon characters, who base their vocabulary around "cool" and "sucks," mocking the very audience that religiously watches their shows. We've got a generation that doesn't give a rip about its image or employment or anything. 'lb an outsider, wandering around 19908 America might seem like rompOrder ing around some macabre sado-masYour Personalized ochistic playground, complete with Graduation instant gratification and, of course, lots 0' violence. What's even scarier is Announcements that this list only scratches the surWith graduation Just face . I left out Somalia, Jeffrey around the comer don't forget that Ulrich's Dahmer and, oops, "alteInative." But Bookstore carries a what would this same outsider make complete line of of O.J.'s televised flight from the announcements, Invitations LAPD, or the inclusion of Beavis and and undergraduate caps, Butt-head as representatives of pop gowns and tassels from culture? 'The outsider would certainly mock the hell out of our generation. But that's OK. What transcends Remember the University ot Michigan with a college class ring from Jostens. these symbols is a greater meaning Make your selection from many Men' s and Women's styles. a greater representation of the '90s. To prepare yourselt for that great Job search, Ulrich's Bookstore can also The key here is informational exhelp you write a powerful resume from one of the many resume writing change. Sure, when the 1990s are books that they stock. And , when you land the interviews, Ulrich's has the mentioned, the first things one thinks books to help you through those also. ofis Beavis, O.J., and CNN. But like 6 1YEARS prosperity t:ranscends 1950s Amez:iMain Bookstore: cana, alloWIng Mom to ~ake the p1e 549 East University and Dad to ~lax an~ listen to the Art/Engineering Store and game. 'There 1S a definite theme that Electronics Showroom: transcends '90s Americana. This 1117 South University theme is information. It's got to do Mon-Fri 9:00-0:00 Sat 9:30-5:00 with O.J ., Beavis, CNN, the Internet, Sunday Noon to 4:00 V !RE THAN A BOOKSTORE and gangsta rap. . ,




41 A._~I'IJ/S

~: , ~




March 29, 1995

Defenders of the Faith ..



WAS A LIBERAL. BACK IN '!HE days when things were simple. I was a liberal. Liberals wanted to

do something, and conservatives wanted to do nothing, and that was at least half the reason. I didn't grow out of myoid views, really, the liberals grew out of them. Part of what I came to hate about the new liberalism was the devaluation of new thought. the feeling that all the liberal thought that was necessary had been made years ago and that liberals just needed to fight blindly towards the goal instead of innovating. This thought was nothing new for conservatives, who have always had such a constituency. but at the time it seemed like a dangerous and confusing thing to me. Liberalism used to be about change baaed on the need for change. Liberals used to believe there was something wrong that needed fixing. Incidentally, that something wrong was upheld by conservatives, who in tum saw liberala as radical upstart.a, and themselves 8S the defenders of


the faith, keeping American homes free from filthy things , different things, monsters that can crush cities. They were like brave centurions defending the homeland against barbarians. But then, something went terribly wrong. All of a sudden, liberals became upholders of the status quo, and conservatives became the radicals. You know exactly what I mean; somehow people like Newt Gingrich and his hordes came to be the radicals, and the Demoa-atic Party became convinced that it didn't want change anymore . Things came around full circle, and the conservatives became radicals while the liberals became traditionalists. This change seems chaotic, and ' 'though I would not have predicted it, with hindsight I think that its heart is clear. Different things·are important taus at different stages lit.

our lives. Today, the national debt is important, and school lunches are not, but in a few years, deforestation could be important, while O.J. Siinpson takes the back seat. Things change, and the parties and ideologies that back them change too. It boils down to a simple observation: most Americans do not believe

"Is that my left or yours?"

in the left wing, the right wing, or even the center. Rather, they believe in any of the three ~perhaps at the same time - as long as they can ra- , tionalize politics as a fight against I some dark and hideous thing. An anny I doesn't fight for economics or social • injustice, it fights because it is the I force of Good, and its opponent is Evil, I and because that is the way it always I has been. When the Evil is vanI quished, the soldiers go home and get • back to work on their muscle cars, I gardens, and teruris games. I. ~ • Likewise, voters choose politicians • because they seem them as some kind of holy warriors who will champion the causes of goodness and niceness. Whenever voters cannot find somePattrice Maurer, AATU Director and Notorious Leftist thing bad to smite down, they start watching MTV instead of CNN. 'lherefore, politicians have become very good at finding something to fight against, For a tax-deductiele contribution of $25 or more, you'll receive a one-year be it abortion or AIDS, North Korea subscription to the Michigan Review, which includes 13 bi-weekly issues or California. and the 1995 Summer Orientation Issue. Your subscription will keep you Conservatives are good at fightposted on the state ofleftist activists at Michigan, the continuing erosion of ing against more tangible evils, like traditional academic standards, and the politicization of the classroom. crazy dictators, the national debt, and PBS. Meanwhile, liberals excel at Please send my subscription to: fighting evils that are more interpreName:: _________________________________________ tive, such as poverty, homelessness and conservatives, but are less apt at dealing with things like war. This is Address: _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ _ __ part of the basis for swings in political favoring. To combat it and protect themselves, big parties like the GOP City: State: Zip: _ _ _ __ and the Democratic Party have started constantly revising their image to faPlease make check or money order payable to: I vor the latest fads . For instance, votTHE MICHIGAN REVIEW I : rs can now choo~ pro-choice Repub911 North University Avenue Suite One Ann Arbor MI 48109-1265 .J ,..::ana and pro-life Democrats. "!"II!' . ..- : ...' 11!111 ............ _ .- . .,... ._ - -,.;. - ..... - - . -.- .. . So why do these shifts in opinion

r,---------.Doyou IthinkU-M I students : should be I forced to gIve muney to this woman?

Neither Do We



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_ __





''''''_ ~_ ,,


, _ _ _ __


occur at all? In a way, they are symbolic of the voters slowly running down a list of methods to implement Utopia, and watching them fail one by one. 'lhe parties act as instruments in the pushing of these methods, and each one takes up a new method. as soon as the old one is recognized as doomed. In a way, this is the manifest destiny of democracy: people hammering out their own future by their own rules. However, it also is suggestive of the impossibility of schemes for a perfect world. Alternatively, it is conceivable that powerful Americans don't want better so much as they want the same thing they have now, in a slightly different flavor. Rich gentleman fanners might be passing money through environmentalist-impersonating lobbyists to corrupt politicianS (there's a concept) who will all band together and make an organized lie they call a platform, just before the election, only to carry out some secret Contract with the Devil. 'lhese views suggest that there is no better tomoITOW in the cards, and ,that 8UcceSS 'andperfection are the falsehoods that are holding American society back. What if, rather than the government or politicians or the people of America that are flawed, it is our words like "radical" and "traditional" that are flawed? For too long, change has been a lifestyle of itself It could be that Americans are becoming more moderate, and letting the evidence and not their emotion judge issues. True moderation, the most powerful stanre to take, is the belief that, while a traditional course of action is the safest non-crisis method, radical action is very appropriate and necessary if a serious problem exists. Obviously, this kind of believe would seriously undermine the major parties. This, in turn suggests that the future is very bright, and that this uncertainty of the meanings of liberal and conservative is a foreshadowing of that brightness. Perhaps conservatives are giving up tradition for its own sake, and liberals are giving up change for the purpose of change. It might just mean that people who once held these persuasions will begin to take up actual agendas geared towards a worthwhile result, instead of mimicking their forefathers. In the best case, this could also bring about more swing voters, who vote for the politicians who believe as they do . People might stop saying things like, "We won't vote conservative, because we never have." It might not be reason enough. Ml.


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March 29, 1995

o EsSAYS An Impressiv~ National Agenda BY GEOFF BROWN


OU KNOW, I OFTEN HAVE wondered what I would do if I were to be elected or appointed to high public office; I mean, why not? There seems to be all kinds of intense debate in Congress these days as to what should be done with this country and all its various problems. Everybody talks like they have the answers: Democrats, Republicans, Independents, serial killers. However, the political rhetoric spewing forth from politicians in Washington claiming that they have all the answers is obviously inaccurate partisan posturing. It is ludicrous to think that these low~own career politicians can solve our problems, since it is obvious to anyone with an IQ higher than melba toast that I have the best ideas for running the country. For example, I have a number of excellent plans for reducing the size of the government should I ever be elected president. First of all, I'd get rid of all those pesky cabinet members, and replace them with a special advisory body with far more power

and influence over Congress. 'Ibis new advisory department would be known as the Department of Bob, headed by a large dog, preferably a Rottweiler or a Doberman pinscher, named Bob. Bob would be my liaison to the House and Senate, helping me get my ideas across in a clear, concise manner. For example, let's Bay some overbearing member of Congress decides it would be a good idea to add a few more pork-filled governmental programs to the federal budget. I now would have an efficient way of conveying to this member of Congress that I do not believe that his course of action is a prudent one: Congressman: President Brown, I have an idea for a bill that would create a National Ferret Intestinal Disorder Awareness Week, which would, of course, raise taxes through the roof, and I wanted to knowMe: No. ,.,," " C: But, sir, I haven't even finishea tellingM: Bob, I think you should explain to Congressman Finkle our position on

this matter. Bob : GggggggIIIllllnowwwwwllll!! [LUNGES FOR CONGRESSMAN FINKLE] C: AAAHH!!!! GET HIM OFF ME!! I GIVE UP!!! JUST GET HIM OFF!!! I am prepared to face the possibility that I may not ever be elected

With such impressive ideas and goals, I'm sure I shall have no problem completing my qU,e st ...

,' "

president, in which case I am open to several other governmental employment options: -Vice President: Welle, Ie amejuste . ase qualifiede ase anyonee elsee whoe ;; hase evere hade the jobe. Ie cane spelle hettere tooe. -Surgeon General: rm hoping to be a doctor one day; and, hey, if that Elders woman can get the job and fritter it away talking about legalizing drugs and advocating masturbation, how badly could I screw it up? ':

.... '. :

-Ambassador to France: I could use my vast knowledge of the French language along with my diplomatic skills to convey important opinions of our government to our friends in France in an attempt to improve the average French citizen's opinion of Americans. One possible iroage-enhancing point I could make would be: "Pourqoui pas dites-nous qui a sauvez votre petites derrieres fran~aises des allemandes dan la deuxieme guerre mondiale, jerquee?" (translation: "Why don't you tell us who saved your little French asses from the Germans in W orId War II, jerky?"). I could also point out, diplomatically, that if"y'all don't lose the attitudes, we can just as easily send over Elmr-Epcot Center, you know ... n yvith such impressive ideas and goals, I'm sure I shall have no problem completing my quest; to make the country and the world a better place to live. I welcome any letters of support for my visioruuy plans, addressed to me at the Review office. You also may send ~e any letters criticizing my plans, addressed to the Departm.ent of Bob. m

;",. '


Political Correctness' Equals Apathy BY



ND THE METHOD used to derive such a product is the decarboxylation of ... " "WAIT A-MINUTE! EXCUSE ME! MAY I ~AY SOMETHING PLEASE?" She had finally done it. On the first day of March, a young woman with a white hat on her head and dissent in her heart had interrupted my professor during his lecture to speak her mind and tell him what she thought. "YOU'RE BORING, HONEYl" are the words I hear whenever I think of this encounter. Lisa E's (as she calls herself) words were filled with disgust and anger. But what disgusts me is that I have not seen anything like this in my seven months of residence on campus. It's difficult to say exactly what she was trying to protest, but the mere essence of her effort struck me. Finally someone had stood up to authority and threatened the well-being of society. Back in the 1960a, the U-M campus was famous for having a politically active student body. When one asks people on campus today about such issues as Jake Baker, scholarship quotas, and other potentially "hot" issues, the general answer one receives is, "1 don't really ~ow/

" --~,----

wish to speak about it. n People are afraid of offending somebody else, so they refuse to speak their minds. They have to concur with the ideology of everyone else in society. Political correctness has inhibited the right of free speech, and therefore has restricted the right to one's thoughts. Each student on campus is aware of the requirement to be politically correct. Does one have to be politically correct to graduate from college? Is PC 101 part of every degree program at the U-M? No, it is a requirement of society to be PC, instilled upon the people by those who know what's best, like the U-M faculty. An exclusion of these fundamental liberties creates a false academic atmosphere. Society declares what is right and what is wrong to say. Generally speaking, speech is most coherent and pure when it is exactly what is on the speaker's mind. But to say what is on your mind is sometimes, more often than not, offensive. Anything spoken that is disputable could be perceived as insulting by someone in society. To speak in this way would be anti-PC. Yet the best way to learn is to ask questions and to doubt immediate justification. Just as the faculty of the University strives to create excelle~ce and n,a,q onal leadership,

its promotion of political correctness restricts the student's thought. "I COULD KICK YOUR ASS RIGHT NOW, BUT I'M NOTGONNA I OWN THIS UNIVERSITY!" Lisa's words had obviously offended my professor, as he ran out the door to call secwity. She was not being PC, as she invaded his personal space and ruffled his feathers with her words. She was telling him what was exactly on her mind. Many said she was psychotic; others said she was stupid. I say she was strong. She stood up and told everyone in the lecture hall what was exactly on her mind. Nobody joined her; she stood alone. One brave soul among the multitude of impassive members of the student body was anti-PC. To be PC is to be apathetic. Apathy is rampant on today's college campuses. Everybody goes to class everyday and nothing important ever seems to happen. Each day goes by in a monotonous tone. We are being led by our superiors, but who will lead us in the future? We are the leaders of the future, yet the atmosphere created by the preaching of political correctness teaches us to remain seated and accept what others are doing in this world. Lifestyles and cultures unlike my .own are important in sustaining the .

diversity of American culture, and my denouncement of political correctness is in no wayan attempt to con路 demn these groups. Yet ifpeople are not willing to speak their minds, then no change will occur. If there is one thing I want to learn here at the University ofMichigan, it's how to communicate. I want to be able to tell my boss when he isn't doing what I believe to be right. I want to learn to effectively tell my colleagues what I think of a present situation. If I have to be afraid of offending someone, then I will choose my words carefully, and I may not be able to say what exactly is on my mind. Well, I may not need to worry. The constant emphasis of the necessity to be politically correct here at the University may eventually penetrate into my subconscious. I may ultimately be trained like a laboratory rat to completely shut out any bad thoughts that I may have. With their promotion of political correctness, Duderstadt and the faculty of the U-M are telling us what to say and what to think. In my mind, Mom is the only person who half the right to persuade me to develop a specific belief. I don't refer to Duderstadt as "Mom," so how can he ,take on that role? Ml.


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March 29,1995


The "Prince of,D arkness" Speaks


N FEBRUARY 22, FORMER Review editor Tracy Robinson

ever going' to have permanently reduced government.

interviewed political columnist and commentntor Robert D. Nooak at hi. Wa8hington, DC office. Mr. NovaJc u a nationally syndicated columnist, edits the Evans and Novak Political Report, and appears weekly on CNN8 Capital Gang.

MR: Republicans seem to be backing down on term limits since the election. They say that to fuHiII the "Contract With America" they merely have to vote on term limits and not pass them. What do you think is going to happen?

MR: What was the message voters sent to politicians In the November election?

NOVAK: Dissatisfaction with President Clinton, downsize government, get the government off our backs. MR: Republlcant have been talking a lot about amaller government lately, but after ponticia.. are In office a while, they often forget their CImpIign promiHl. Leading AepubliclnlIIke Bob Dole came out In favor of universal coverage for heIIIh ca'e, which would have cr..ted a huge governmental bureaucracy; House Speaker Newt Gingrich's hero Is FDA, 1M founder of the modem welfare state; and .,en DIck Anney has supported pork protects like the superconducting euperooIIldar, becIuee It would have crtMed )obItn hie ttate.

NOVAX: Yes, and Phil Gramm too. MR: In the 1980a Prtlidtnt Reagan also talked about decrtaSing the size of government, but he only slowed down the rate of Increa .., n lid not decreestll Ale Republleans really serious about smaller government this time around?

NOVAK: I thinkltheyreallyare serious, but it is a terrific test whether they can do it because the longer they are around here, the more they become wedded to government, the le88 inclined they are to want to really cut back on government. But this test is going to be conducted this year and whether they are just going to nibble around the edges 0:': really do something and fulfill the mandate they have gotten - that's the test. And the jury is still out. Nobody knows how it will come out.

NOVAK: I don't think they were ever serious about it in the first place. The Democrats hate term limits and admit it. The Republicans hate term limits and pretend they like them. They did it because it's very popular. As professional politicians, the old-time Republicans - the Old Bulls didn't like it much more than the Democrats. So it looked pretty bad; it was going to be a disaster for both the term limits movement and. the Republi~ "There looks to be I.!, way out now - although Congressman McCollum, > ~ho is the nominal leader of term limits in Congress is resisting it ..;...;andthat ie&nator Hank. Brown's proposal, which is the ao-oilled "federalist approach," which would be that you pass a statute permitting each state to set its own term limits, And that is something that I think Newt Gingrich and the term limits movement can all agree on. MR: Republicans appear sharply divided on the Issue of abortion. While many in the party want to continue to focus on economic issues and drop controversial issues like abortion from the party platform, Ralph Reed of the Christian Coalition recently recommended that members of his group not support a Republican candidate for president who is not ardently pro-ute. What are the Republicans going to do about this contentious issue?

NOVAK: 'That isn't exactly what Reed said. What Reed said was that the ticket would have to be pro-life or the members ofhis group would not vote for it I think he was just firing a shot across the bow. He's a compromising MR: Do you think ~ term lmils could help alleviate the problem of excessive politician - I can't imagine that the spending and expanding government? Christian Coalition would vote against the Republican ticket if, say, the vice NOVAX: I really believe 80. I have president were pro-choice. The Refelt for a long time that the only way publicans want to change the subject; they don't want to talk about aborthat you are going to get a long-term permanent change of attitude in tion. It's a very divisive issue in the Republican Party. Of course, the Washington toward government was Democrats want them to talk about th.fough congressional term limits. abortion. It's going to be a matter of You can't get a new class of 73 firepolitical skill whether they can essenea ters coming in every two years by luck or by the political cycle. Unless tially take a position at the next con~u get term limits I don't thinkyou)'e ' , vention' which gets away from the

Human Life Amendment, which isn't going anywhere anyway, and essentially puts the issue of abortion back at the state level to say that the policy of the Republican Party is to let the states handle this.

NOVAK: I don't think Perot is going to run this time, although it's very hard to predict what he is going to do. MR: Will Clinton be reelected, or does it depend on who he is rUMing against?

NOVAK: I don't think it has much to do with who he is running against; it has to do with what the sentiment is. With the sentiment right now, I don't think he would be reelected. We've got a long way to go to the campaign. Clinton's not a popular president; he's a president who has lost the confidence of the people, so I think he's extremely vulnerable no matter who the Republicans nominate. MR: How did you begin your career in joumalism? MR: What are your predictions for the 1996 presidential election? For the Republicans, Bob Dole seems to be the current frontrumer, but Phil Gramm has the capacity to raise a great deal of money.

NOVAI{: Republicans usually nomi~ nate thefrontrunner .... theperson who, as the Republicans tend to say, "deserves it," who has gone up all the steps - Bush in '88, Reagan in '80, Nixon in '68, and 80 on. And on that basis, Dole would be the overwhelming favorite, but a lot of people are worried about his age. There's still some doubt about how he is going to do in some of the primary states, so I think there's going to be a fight for the nomination. You're quite right that his principle challenger is Phil Gramm.. I think Lamar Alexander is in the picture. Governor Pete Wilson of California - I think he's going to run. And I still believe that come autumn, Newt Gingrich is going to take a look at the field and decide whether he wants to get in. MR: What about the Democrats - wiD President Clinton face a serious primary challenge?

NOVAK: That's a difficult question to answer. I think that Senator Bradley is seriously thinking about running. Nobody knows what Senator Kerrey of Nebraska will do, possibly he might run. Jesse Jackson keeps threatening to run. I think any of those are possibilities. I don't think you'll find Congressman Gephardt running unless President Clinton drops out. Let's say that there's a possibility of a semi-eeri.ous challenge. MR: How about a third party-do you think that Ross Perot wiD jump In?

NOVAK: I always wanted to be a newspaperman. I was manager of the track. team in high school and I started writing up track meets for the local paper, and they liked me so well they hired me as a part-time sports reporter. MR: And how did you get to Washington?

NOVAK: I wrote sports in college, and in my hometown paper and in the local paper in college and then I went in the army during the Korean War for two years. When I got out, I got a job with the Associated Press covering the Nebraska legislature, went to Indiana and covered the Indiana legislature, and then I was transferred to Washington by the Associated Press when I was 26 years old, MR: Many people believe that the mainstream media has a distinct left-wing bias. Do you agree?

NOVAK: The mainstream media is more liberal than anybody can dream, They're so liberal that most of them don't even know that they are liberal - they think that everybody is that way and that the only people who believe in the private enterprise system, in low taxes and a strong national defense and all those things must be right-wing nuts. One of the real problems in this country is that the media is totally dominated by liberals. And one of the problems is that young conservatives tend not to go into the media; they go into investment banking, or advertising, or what have you. But I've been in the media all my life - over 40 years as a professional journalist - and it was liberal when I got in and it's much more . liberal today. Mt

March 29, 1995




.A Libertaria,n World View ,~. "~f''''''


N MARCH 9, JAMES A Rob路 em, II of the Review inter路 viewed Doug Bandow . Bandow sertled as an advisor in the Reogan administration and is a former editor of Inquiry magazine. He now writes a syndicated column and is a senior fellow at the Cato Institute in Washington, DC. MR: In hit book, Thelhchlnery of Freedom, David Friedman suggests that the concept of a libertarian foreign policy Is problematic. "Under an interventionist policy," he writes, "we defend our_vea, when it seems necessary, by helping the governments we ally with to oppr888 their citizens. Under a non-interventlonlst policy, we defend oursefvel, when It seems necessary, by killing innocent cItizenI of the governments we ar. fighting against" In your opinion, doeIa Hbertarian foreign policy exist? SANDOW: Yes. To say that it exists doesn't mean that it's easy. He certainly raises some important philosophical points, but I think you can apply libertarian principles to foreign policy, and it suggests that a nonintezventiorust policy is best. It certainly suggests care and caution in having the US government act because of the harms that it can cause. But I do think that a free people have a right to defend themselves, and in this world, at least, it's hard to come up with a system other than through governmental action.


MR: What type of policy should the United States now adopt?

BANDOW: I think clearly the US should move back to a foreign policy adapted to that of a republic, rather than an empire. We certainly don't need an expansive military policy, we don't have to keep one and a half million soldiers at their arms. We don't have to have the kind of military commitments that we do today. So I think the only justification for a large military was the threat of Soviet communism. That threat being gone, clearly we should be adjusting our foreign and military policies in response.

MR: During the Cold War, those on the rts;rt, Iimpty speaIdng, 1Inded to favor interventionism whil. those on the left favored i8oIa1lorism. To eome anent. the opposite Is now true today. Whit, In your opinion, aecounts for this change?

BANDOW: I think that you see some very real debates on both right and left. You have within the consezvative movement some people who have

seemed to have grown to like interventionism and they still want to do so. If you want to get back to principles of smaller government, you have to deal with foreign policy. I think, on the other hand, the left. has a foreign policy view of selflessness. That is, they don't like interventionism to protect American interests, which is why they didn't like it during the Cold War. But they like the idea of rurming around the world making the world to be safe for democracy. In a sense, I think the left. now wants to intezvene whenever it's not in America's interest And I think that grows naturally out of their philosophy. MR: Many foreign policy experts believe that the future of Russia is the most Important international issue that America currently faces. What should the US do concerning.RUSsia, If anything?

BANDOW: I think .路 that we should certainly, in some general sense, promote and hope for the success.of democracy and capitalism. I think tluit means having a free trade policy with them - it makes no sense not to buy their products. I think it also means reducing military threats - it makes no sense to expand NATO up to Russia's borders and encourage the Russians to maintain a military by feeling threatened by our continuing US alliance against Russia. On the other hand, we shouldn't be giving them aid because I think foreign aid simply doesn't work. At best, we're going to be funding all the wrong people over there and I think the evidence says foreign aid tends to retard rather than promote reform. And in the main, we shouldn't intervene in their own political struggles. MR: What role should international organizations, such as the United Nations or NATO, play in American foreign policy?

BAND OW: I think the absolute minimum. NATO had a role in the midst of the Cold War. It has no role today; there simply is no enemy for NATO to be allied against. An organization like the United Nations might have some minimal value as a place for countries to let off steam. It certainly should not be treated seriously and the US certainly should not commit serious resources to it nor put US forces under the control of such organizations.

MR: Turning to domestic issues, libertarians seem to have given the Republicans'

"Contract With America" mixed reviews. Some claim it is a sincere attempt to reduce the size of government, while others Insist that it is proof that the GOP It not committed to protecting liberty. What is your view?

BANDOW: I think that libertarians should have no allusions: Republicans are politicians. And many of them are politicians who believe in government. There are 73 Republican freshmen in the House; there are 157 no~ freshmen. Many of those non-fresbmen are fairly big spenders who've been around for a long time and tend to like government. I think that libertarians should work with Republicans where they can and criticize them where they need to. There are some things in the "Contract With America," things like term limits, which I think are very good. We need to work with them where we can and oppose them where we have to. MR: You have written a number of columns about the threat that governmental regulation and bureaucracy pose for the economy. Is there an appropriate amount of regulation, or do you believe that government should adopt a laisssz faire economic approach?

BANDOW: I think definitely that government should keep its hands much more off the economy. There are places where you need government to be involved - for example, to try to help defend property rights. And I think there are areas where you can have market friendly regulations. You can use market mechanisms to try to reduce pollution in a way that's just not so destructive economically as it is today. We're never going to get a way with no regulations - I don't think that's realistic. On the other hand, it should be strictly limited; it should be much more reliant on market forces. It needs to be much more constrained. Right now, . basically,

government can destroy whole industries if it wants to. That sort of situation is just utterly unacceptable. MR: Many libertarian philosophers claim that classical liberalism, being in large measure a derivative of reason, is In conftict with theism and religious faith. What is your response to this? BANDOW: I think that one has to recognize that religion, at least in my view, certainly Christianity, is a world view for the whole person, while libertarianism is a political philosophy. There's no :reason to believe those are, in fact, in conflict. To my mind, one can hold a very libertarian political philosophy and still be a Christian or have another religious faith. Even though the Enlightenment and classicalliberalism are closely related, there is nothing, I think, inherent in conflict between a religious faith and libertarianism. Indeed, I would argue the strongest basis for libertarianism is a Jewish or Ch,ristian beliefin the transcendence and sacredness ofman, and in fact if there is a transcendent ru.l,d .eternal soul, that gives a very """ strong basis. for protecting individu- . als in saying that those rights cannot be violated by the government. It's the strongest basis, I would argue, for that kind of a political belief. So I think they really are consistent.

MR: You have served in a wide array of different jobs, including an advisor in the Reagan administration, a magazine editor, a senior fellow at the Cato Institute, and a syndicated columnist. How has your career developed? BANDOW: It all depends on propinquity - that is, location. While I was at Stanford Law School, I wrote for the Stanford Daily and I found out years later that Martin Anderson, who was at the Hoover Institution, read what I wrote for the Stanford Daily. He was putting together the Reagan presidential campaign, and he asked me if I wanted to work for the campaign. I did that right out of law school; that sent me to Washington, and then I went from the administration to Inquiry, because I had met Ed Crane and some of the Cato people, and offit went from there. So, there's a good measure of luck, connections, providence - however one wants to put it. You write for a student newspaper; you never know where that might lead. That's the lesson in terms of my career. If I had not written for the Stanford Daily, I have no idea what I would have been doing. Mt

March 29, 1995



o ISSUE FORUM: AYN RAND Ayn Rand:,/}.. Great Polemicist BY AARON STEELMAN


EW FIGURES IN U.S. history are able to stir pro· found and heartfelt emotions in people. Martin Luther King is one. JFK is one. And so is Ayn Rand. When discussing the ideas of Ayn Rand, very few people take an honest, objective middle ground; they either denounce her as some sort of mania· cal figure along the lines of a Mussolini or a Hitler (as witnessed by attacks made by Whittaker Chambers and others) or they proclaim her as the greatest philosopher since Aristotle -literally (as witnessed by the em· barrassingly mindless appraisals made by Leonard Peikoff, John Ridpath, and others). Such. statements are inaccurate and misleading. Rand was neither the demon Chambers POl'trayed her to be, nor the goddess Peikoff and others continue to herald her as. Rand, like many other impor· tant figures in history, is a mixed bag: there is much merit to what she did in her life and to what she had to say, but there is also a great deal that one needs to look at critically. To state that Ayn Rand might not

have been the greatest philosopher since Aristotle, or that she might have even been capable of making a mis· take, is not an automatic attempt at defaming her, as Peikoff and Ridpath believe. Instead, it is simply an hon· est appraisal - one that is, in truth, much more kind and humane to Rand than the false ones heaped on her by die-hard Randroids; for to claim that Rand was infallible is to deny her the rightful respect she deserves: Rand is, quite simply, the most important libertarian of the twentieth century. She does not deserve this acco· lade, for the merits of her arguments, as devout Objectivists would suggest, however. Instead, she deserves it for the tremendous service she paid to the ideas of freedom by engaging her remarkable expository power in an all but attack on the ideas and propo. nents of tyranny, statism, and totali· tarianism. In short, Rand is not the most important libertarian of the twentieth century because she was a great philosopher - she wasn't (her theory of knowledge, philosophy of science, and her claim that the rights system shedef~ed led to a minimal state all are seriously flawed) '- but

because she was the most effective and powerful spokesperson for libertarian ideals who has ever lived. FA Hayek, when discussing how collectivists of all types had come to such prominence throughout the world, promoted his theory of "the second hand dealers in ideas." In Hayek's framework, there are a few truly original thinkers in a movement who conceive and work out a systematic philosophy. This philosophy is then filtered down throughout the movement ~d picked up by various "believers." It is these believers who are most vital in the transmission and popularizing of the philosophy to the public at large. Such was the role that George Bernard Shaw and VIrginia Woolf played in the advancement of Fabian Socialism, and such was the role Ayn Rand played in the advancement of classicalliberallsm. To paraphrase Jerome Tuccille, it does indeed usually begin with Ayn Rand. For all of Objectivism's many philosophical problems, there can be little question that many bright young libertarians begin as Objectivists, entbralleciby theidEtas°fRand after

staymgttpfor 36h~ in a row ~.

ing Atlas Shrugged cover to cover. It is this experience, more than any other, that awakens them to the world ofideas. Many go on to read the works ofMises, Hayek, Buchanan, and others and find that there are many more serious thinkers than Rand to be discovered. But, if it hadn't been for Rand, it is likely that they would have never been interested in furthering their study. Rand is truly the fountainhead of the classical liberal movement. And this is all that needs to be said; it is an extraordinary accomplishment in itself; she does not need to be worshipped. When the battle with the omnipo. tent state is over and the forces of liberty have won, it will have been those arguments that are Hayekian and Misesian - not Randian - in nature that will have been most important in the attainment of victory. We will all owe a very great debt to Ayn Rand, however; for without Rand, many of those who are presently carrying on, and those who will carry on, the legacy of Hayek and Mises would never have been sufficiently intersAlted, in 'the ideas ofliberty to ",age such a battle. Ml .

Ayn Rand: A Great Thinker BY



AS AYN RAND AN original thinker? First, one must define originality. Is it simply non-imitation or non-confonnity, or perhaps creative thought and an idea liever fathomed before? It is reasonable to hold creativity and newness as indications, granting the fact that these two attributes can constitute a new idea. For example, when the first apple fritter was created, people must have proclaimed, "What a great idea!" Similarly, when Freud came up with his ego, superego, and id, the world was amazed by its explanatory power and beneficence. When Socrates argued that the laws of immortality that apply to physical realities could apply to the soul, he was certainly original. These examples may seem random and within entirely different intellectual realms, but their originality is evident. Each discovery was new to the world, and in most ways beneficial to everyone. But how did these inventnrs and think.ers get these great ideas? By pondering and reorganizing what they knew about the world, and coming to conclusions about life that incorporated a variety of other ideas and facts. Thus, panc!


cake dough can taste good with fruit; and Pythagorean mathematics can bring an organic theory to Socrates's questions about one's soul after death. One argument against Ayn Rand's originality is the fact that Aristotle had already pointed out the objectivity of nature and its inherent value, as well as an explanation oflogos and concept-formation; and John Locke told the world how to bring Aristotle's cognitive efficacy into social construction. Ayn Rand did not radicalize Aristotle's philosophy by attacking its major tenets, and her early life goals did not involve teaching philosophy. Like Freud or Socrates, however, she reorganized what she saw and made others see the world in a different light. The world had never seen characters as wholly true to form as Rand's, just as the world had never seen hypnosis bring about latent childhood fantasies. Thus, her originality was in the completeness of her philosophy, and her unflinching view that one's life must necessarily reflect the subconscious conceptions and moral judgments that guide one's life. One example of Rand's interconnectedness is an obvious difference from Aristotle's epistemology. Epistemology is the study of how one obtains knowledge, and Aristotle

claimed that an important part of gaining knowledge is to perceive and construct correct definitions, whereby concept-formation is not subjective. He held, though, that concept-formation depends on a human intuition that grasps a metaphysical essence and forms concepts accordingly. Ayn Rand changed this view in that an essence is epistemological, and thus wholly knowable through logic, rather than a metaphysical, and thus definitive human quality with which all people are born. She did not leave anything to chance, so that even concept-formation was an active process that could be shut on and offby one person's choice, and corrected or improved on the basis oflogic. So why does this difference matter? Did Ayn Rand really advance Aristotle's ideas? On a more practical level, her advancement, and thus her originality, came across in her novels. She was an artist that held her philosophical ideals as the driving force behind the beauty she always hoped to produce. From the descriptions of her settings, to the entirely predictable actions of her characters; from her dollar signs and cigarettes, to a variety of recuning antidotes; her stories are about the way the world could be if everyone lived like her.

Ayn Rand believed that anyone person's thoughts were connected to a whole string of moral choices and logical or illogical reasoning; they cannot rest on mystical beliefs or pragmatic consciousness to be consistent with rational and productive goals in life. Her philosophical rigidity is more than obvious in her novels. When 9 yearold Dagny Taggart of Atlas Shrugged sees her familial situation "as a regrettable accident, to be borne patiently for a while, that she happened to be imprisoned among people who were dull," it is not a surprise and it is not for effect, but it is necessarily what the character would think because of her unflinching goals of truth, productiveness, and happiness, regardless of circumstance. It is this accusatory view of peoples' natures and their choices that further defines Rand's originality of thinking. When Aristotle theorized about both statist and anti-statist policies in society, he failed Rand's big test of integration and rigidity, and she clarified, "Capitalism [can] not survive in a culture dominated by mysticism and altruism, by the soulbody dichotomy and the tribal premise ... No social system can survive without a moral base." So, capitalism is amoral? My, that is original m

IMarc:h29, 1995


"~"!'" 111

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A Reading From路' the Book of Vices

The great writers of all generaComstock or what?" are frighteningly poet Vladimir Nabokov's excerpt from tions, with some exceptions, were not on the mark. Lolita is a curious dive into the mind moralists, but venturers. They are ofa man obsessed with his 14 yearNE OF '!HE BEST-SELLING In what Schacochis calls "an age those who venture into the dark and books of the past year was old stepdaughter. Yet not every work of co-dependency, self-congatulatory broken places, the sinister places, the William Bennett's The Book in this collection is excellent or even illiteracy, and the crusade for correctdesperate places, the places to which ofVirlues, a collection of stories, poeffective. For example, Richard ness," the mere mention of vices like we as humans go on our quests for ems, and essays that glorified the drinking, smoking, and screwing sets Brautigan's poem "I've Never Had it higher things. Humans are spiritual "morals and ideals of western civilioff chain reactions of condemnation. Done So Gentlv Before" seems more creatures whose quest for virtue and zation," whatever that might mean. The 1990s brought about the truth inevitably, at times, leads them While Bennett's book was indeed a "zealous reformation of the liberto vice and sin. As Schacochis conwonderful collection of inspirational ated counterculture into a prigcludes at the end of his essay, "Spiriand uplifting literature, the Amerigish, middle-aged nation of nagtual quests aren't so simple, and somecan attitude that made it so popular gers and health harpies." times they lure the seeker into smoky was less than refreshing. The 1990s is It is these cultural and social barrooms and the arms of an unexa decade in which the self-righteous reformers that Schacochis sees on both the left; and right of the politipected lover ... They [writers) take as foolishly and futilely trying to the joy and sometimes pain of living cal spectrum are gradually prying conceal the very fact that vice their way into the private lives of to the very edge and shout back inexists. 'Through censorship of the Americans. Thus, the blatant slapstructions, dire caveats, titillating same type of works found in this in-the-face tD the pompous moral cruweather reports." collection as well as speech and conduct codes , these crusaders Vice: It's not just for humans. In short, these stories reassure us saders and the politically correct censors of our time found in Drinking, that, in spite of our era of self-righwant tD deny the fact that the dangers like Damelle Steele or Robert James Smoking, and Screwing (Edited teousness and correctness, we are still oCsin and vice exist. Yet, "The hazWaller spittle than poetry. But this by Sara Nickles, Chronicle Books, humans, and humans al9 not perfect. arns of existence, however, cannot be book probes some of the deepest qUe&1994) is a refreshing and vicarious And, thus, while most peOple would removed, they can only be muflled. ortions of all literature: sin, sex, love, find moral and health reasons not to leap into the world of sin. obscured. Yet a GOn&aled. danger has lust, addiction, self-control, virtue, The stories, poems, and essays live like these characters, many will a much greater potential for damage and despair; and yet the works seem appreciate the poignant slap in the collected in Drinking, Smoking, and than one that has been dragged out to capture a certain element of simface given to the public figures who Screwing simultaneously celebrate into the light, posted with warning plicity and humor, two elements that try to oo.n trol our private lives. and bemoan the wonder of vice. In an signs, and peItaps,even befriended ..: remiIld us .tbat we're only human. age in which smokers are public enThe .writers arithologized in . emy number one, the lunchtime marDrinking, Smolling, and Screwing tini is seen as a decadent faux pas, faced censorship and animosity when and sex has the potential to be lethal, they dragged these issues and behavthe virtues of vice, the romance, pasiors into the light, sometimes ostrasion, and struggle of Bin are preserved cizing them. And despite the moral mainly in literature. For centuries outrage that some claimed was writers have held steadfast to their present in these works, all the works cravings and lusts; sometimes bein this collection are first-rate. They moaning their own lack. of self-conencompass the humor, the despair, trol, and at other ti.nres defending the the guilt, and the struggle that acbeauty of drunken rohlps with a cigacompanies a life of indulgence. rette afterwards. DrinAing, SmoJcing, Dorothy Parkers story, "You Were and Screwing incorporates such tales Perfectly Fine," begins the collection with authors ranging from Twain to with a humorous account of a young Nabokov to Lebowitz. 1920s dandy who awakens the next 'The rollection's introduction, writmorning with an adoring young lady ten by Bob Schacochis, wonderfully at his side, who is very much in love sets the wry Bal"alBm of the collection, with him. The poor hungover fellow We have added to our already extensive beer selection many a tone that upbraid8 ~e self-righcloses the story muttering, "Oh dear, new micro-brewed beers for your sampling pleasure. teous and the nosy. Schacochis says oh, dear, oh dear." Spalding Gray's that he "made the mistake ofimagin"College Girls" recalls a series of failed ing that the personal was well, a perrelationships and flings encountered sonal matter, rather than somebody during the pursuit of higher educaelse's political agenda. Sometime durtion. Present in Grey's chuckle-proing the past ten years things changed." voking piece is a perfect depiction of In an era in which the nation's most the awkwardness, inebriation, torinfluential political group is the ment, and wonder that typifies ex"Christian" Coalition, in which some ploratory young love. Another guffeminists would bring back. book bumfaw-worthy piece is L. Rust Hills's Our premium whisky collection is constantly growing and ing if they rould, and in which. univer"How to Cut Down on Drinking and sities are bastions of conduct codes, Smoking So Much," in which the ronnow features select whiskies from Ireland and the U.S. these words ring resoundingly true. fused author struggles to remember which days are designated "sober." Schacochis's witty observations like, "Say, is Catherine MacKinnon really Some works present in the collecthe reincarnation of Anthony tion are less light-hearted. Charles Bukowski's "Women" is an excellent, Full Menu * Kitchen Open Late * Live Jazz Tuesday Nights Dean Bakopouros doesn't know too albeit disturbing, prose piece depictmuch about smoking or screwing... ing the sexual adventures of a drunken




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As always, sampling is encouraged!

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The Wisdom o.f Lawrence of Arabia BY BEN KEPPLE


URING THE F.lRffi'WORLD War, members of the British government felt that by spurring on and supporting a rebellion of the subject people of Arabia. they could strike a painful blow against the Ottoman Empire. 'The Ottoman Empire was a member of the Central Powers and allied with Germany during the war, fighting against the Allied Powers in Europe. T.E. Lawrence (aka "Lawrence of Arabia," 1888-1935) was a soldier in the British army who, after serving in Arabia, chronicled what he described as the "Arab Revolt" during World War I. But he was not merely a chronicler, he was an integral part of the rebellion, acting a8 a coordinator, strategist, and representative of Britam among the Arabs rebelling against the oppressive Ottoman Empire. Lawrence was even an official leader of the rebelling army. For those interested in history, the book serves as an important and interesting narrative ofthe war in this area ofthe world and leads towards a broader sense ofWorld

War I that is removed from the more studied European theater. And this is merely another reason why the book is so interesting. One of the difficulties in reading the Seven Pillars of Wisdom (Anchor Books, 672 pages) is that Lawrence, mostly in the first book of his writing (it acts as a introduction to the region and the revolt) and to a lesser extent afterwards, makes comparisons of peoples and races that to many modern readers would seem to be very insensitive and demeaning. Another difficulty is that his writing is that of a narrative and not a pure historical account; Lawrence considers his opinions on policy and warfare to be largely colTElCt, lambasting those who disagree with him as slow-witted dullards. If one can get past these arguably minor problems, however, one will find it to be a extremely informative, first-rate narrative of the revolt One can not only.witness a military history of Lawrence's involvement in the revolt, but a~y experience being on the front lines. Especially valuable information is gleaned from the de-


scriptions of people with which Lawrence has to deal, whether they are British or Arab, and it adds another dimension to his work that one cannot gain from mere military history. Lawrence discusses supply problems, problems with the men in the army, and also diplomatic problems that stem from the people with which he works and the opinions of those officers with which he disagrees. 'These writings clearly show how armies do not run smoothly and without dissent; his narrative does an excellent job in explaining conflicts between the Arab leaders and tribes, as well as those between the soldiers in the Allied army and at British headquarters. One can see where Lawrence considers himself to be correct once again as he (gleefully, it seems) denigrates his fellow officers and their conflicting opinions while writing. Another problem is that Lawrence faces an inner conflict. He personally has to deal with being a British soldier who knows that if things go wrong, he and Britain will have to abandon the revolt and the culture in which he has asaimilated. WitboutBritiaharma

and explosives, and overall Allied support, the rebellion probably would not have survived when faced with such a withdrawal of support. The Anchor edition is a surprisingly good edition for a paperback, and it contains many black and white illustrations of the author and of the Allies and Arabs with which lawrence had contact in Arabia. Most of the drawings are extremely life-like in their representations of their subjects. Occasionally, one can see how Lawrence also looked at different times and in different dress, and this is a added dose of realism. Overall, the Seven Pillars ofWisdom is a thorough, well-written account that relates a history with a narrative of this theater of operations, and it most certainly does not conform to modern politically correct thought. Lawrence writes as a man who has not just experienced the Arab culture but in fact has assimilated himselfinto it. His unique personal narrative is not very different from that of a rhilitary history, but leaves one with a more intimate view of the


Individualism and Feminism Do Mix BY AARON STEELMAN


HEN CAMILLE PAGLIA hit the scene in 1990 with the publication of her first book, Sexual Perao1U1e, the feminist movement was completely comatose. The movement, which had been founded by fervent individualists firmly committed to the ideas of selfhelp and selH-eliance, had. been taken over by a group of people who equated feminism with dependency. 'The feminism of Susan B. Anthony, Rose Wllder Lane, and Isabel Paterson had been replaced by the feminism of Gloria Steinem, Catharine MacKinnon, and Andrea Dworkin. The demand for equal opportunity under the law had been replaced with the demand for affirmative action; the demand for freedom in all affairs, including sexuality, had been replaced with demands for widespread censorship. Paglia redefined the debate. She challenged the establiabment and injected a much needed dose of individualism back into the movement. Her objective was to present an alternative to the Dworkins and MacKinnons, an alternative that viewed women as supremely capable, instead of supremely weak. She turned

the feminist establishment on its head. It is now nearly five years since the publication of Sexual Personae and Camille Paglia is still around. The~sthatmewasa~tan

or a flam in the pan have been put to rest Paglia is continuing to push feminism in a positive direction, as witnessed by her most recent book, Vamps and Tramps: New Essays (Vintage, 532 pages). Vamps and Tramps, despite its title, is not really a collection of new essays. Of the 43 pieces included in this volume, only six were specially written for the book. The rest have appeared previously in publications throughout the United States and Great Britain. Nevertheless, the reader won't be disappointed whether he has read them before, or is just now encountering them for the first time, he will be challenged by nearly all of the essays included in the volume; they are vintage Paglia. Paglia sets the tone for the book in the introduction, writing, "Equal opportunity feminism, which I espouse, demands the removal of all barriers to woman's advance in the political and professional world but not at the price of special protections for women, which are infantalizing and anti-democratic. As

a sixties libertarian, I also oppose the overregulation of sexuality, which has risen to a totalitarian extreme over the past decade in America ... The state mould have no power to oversee or regulate solitary consensual activities, such as sodomy or suicide. Hence I strongly support the legalization of drugs and prostitution, and I am an extreme advocate of the most lurid forms of pornography ... The culture is at risk when civil liberties are sacrificed on the altar of career success." Clearly, Paglia has not mellowed in her late middle age. She is still filled with the same energy and vitality that was so present in Sexual Personae and her second book, Sex, Art, and American Culture. Among the better essays included in Vamps and Tramps are: "'Ihe Return of Carry Nation: Catharine MacKinnon and Andrea Dworkin," which originally appeared in Playboy, and "No Law in the Arena: A Pagan Theory of Sexuality," which, nmning 75 pages, is clearly the signature essay of the book. In the latter essay Paglia attempts to set forth, systematicaly, her philosophy of sexuality - including her views of rape, abortion, sexual harrassment, pornography, and homosexuality. It is a very amibitious essay, one that quite

successfully integrates what she has been saying over the past five years on these complex topics. Surprisingly, cultural conservatives, who have created an unholy alliance with the feminist left in their opposition to Paglia, will find themselves in agreement with some, ifnot a good deal, of what Paglia says in her new book. For example, Paglia, writing about the politicization of secondary schools throughout the country, states, "I view bilingual instruction as shortsighted and counterproductive, and I oppose all social-welfare meddling in public education: condom distribution belongs in public health clinics, not schools, and forcing gay issues into the curriculum is an outrageous act of cultural imperialism by white middle-class ideologues against the working class for whom they claim to speak." Camille Paglia, while not an unqualified libertarian (she still has a long way to go on economic matters) is clearly a force for the good. At a time when both the left and the right are willing to sacrifice civil liberties at the drop of a hat, Paglia's voice is refreshing and inspiring. All those who would like to see feminism saved from itself would be well served to read Vamps and Tramps. Ml

MltH IGAr\j'REvlEw :; ~l~ING c-CiLLURE'"; ,:., , ',

March 29, 1995

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Hey, Look Out for That Bat


URING A VERY SLOW weekend at the box office, I grabbed my gas mask and headed off to see Outbreale, the new viral epidemic film that seemed to be infecting the whole country as it topped the box office charts for the second week in a row. I actually really wanted to see this movie for several reasons. Ita director, German veteran Wolfgang Petersen ofDas Boot and In The Line of Fire fame, also happened to direct one of my all-time favorite tluillers, Shattered. I also seem to enjoy these sort oftechno-militarythrillers. Needless to say, I was not let down. OutbreaJc is a very well-aaft.ed, taut thriller with great attention to detail. Its teclmically exciting subject (a killer virus that threatens to wipe out the entire U.S. population in a matter of hours ifit is not destroyed) seems fit for a Michael Crichton film, while its sweeping scope is reminiscent of a Tom Clancy film - two authors who have each had amazing success on the big screen. The highlight of Outbreal. however, is not the authenticity and believability of the story, but rather Dustin Hoffman's portrayal ofa normal guy caught up in a halTowing situation. Hoffman plays an army doctor, who happens to be a virus expert, called upon to solve a bizaJTe new infection in Africa. When the virus makes its way to the U.S., the military tries to co{.er up the situation because the new virus turns out to be a long-hidden biolov}cal weapon. But Hoffman's character, whose duty to mankind is just barely more powerful than his innumerable fears, ends up saving the day and exposing the military's Wlethical tactics to boot. Hoffinan approaches the role with a genuine nervousness and vulnerability that at first makes him seem completely out of place. But as the story progresses, it becomes apparent



13 1

that he is not meant to be a typical, add a youthful energy lacking in the hard-as-nails superhero. He is the previous movies. Whether Burton's everyman, and this lends credibility withdrawal will be detrimental to the series remains to be seen. Artistito the entire film. cally, his absence will be deeply felt. The supporting cast - consisting of Rene Russo as Hoffman's ex-wife But Schumacher appears to have capand another virus expert, Morgan Freeman as Hoffman's superior officer and friend, and Fritz the Wonder Monkey as "'!be Host" - play equally toned-down characters. The exception here is Donald Sutherland, who takes his lecherous army general to the extreme and makes him almost too easy to hate. In any thriller, one must be wary (Ii , No, thi8/sn'tVal. Kilmer, but It Isa bat, and he Is Batman... the background story: the emotional ~ubplot that usutured a more mainstream. appeal with ally derails even best techno-picthis film, which surely makes Warner Bros. happy - and when the studio is tures. If you examine the subplot of Outbreal. (Russ<> and's relJlt . happy, everybody is happy, right? Not tiaoship) toO d~YJ it may seem a bit cliche<! and unnecessary, which it is. The dialogue may seem a bit trite at times as well, but Petersen's ability to keep you on the edge of your seat and wonderful perlormances all aI'OWld make Outbreak well worth its slight disadvantages. -The bigger story at the theater that day was what we all saw before the movie started. The trailer for Batman Forever shows a vastly different movie than the previous two. Even greater than Michael Keaton's departure is TIm Burton's absence as director. The effects are noticeable. With Joel Schumacher behind the wheel now, Batman Forever promises to be a much lighter romp, something fun for the whole family. Jim Carrey (The RiddIer) and Tommy Lee Jones (Two-Face) are assets on any film, and Chris O'Donnell as Robin will


Write for. MICHIGAN REVIEW LIVING CULTURE We're looking for restaurant, fashion, film, music and book writers to further expand the Review's Living Culture section; we're also looking for individuals with layout expertise. Interested? Call Dean or Greg at 6621909. Or stop by the office - 3rd floor, Suite One, Michigan League. We'd love to talk to you.

necessarily. -There is a brilliant film called TN! Four Corners ofNowhere that is currently circulating amongst the distribution companies, waiting to get picked up for nationwide distribution. But the studios and distribution houses will not take the risk with a film like this, and hence we are all deprived of quality entertainment. Four Comers has received a lot of local press recently because it was filmed entirely here in Ann Arbor. It is a hilarious and touching look at several young people in Ann Arbor and a philosophical nomad who strolls through town and impacts each of their lives. Recent USC film school graduate Steve Chbosky wrote and directed this half-satire, which was one of a very few films to be screened at the prestigious Sundance Film Festival in Utah last year. But despite its critical praise (and a goodsized article in this month's Premiere magazine), no distribution company will touch it because of their fear ofits "Generation X" label, which is a completely different issue for a completely different article. m


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Down With "Goatee Music"



ETS GET RIGHT TO THE point. Why i.8 it okay for Billy Corgan of Smashing Pumpkins and Perry Farrell of Porno for Pyroa to Bing like girla, but if Motley Crue's Vmce Neil and Bret Michaels ofPoiaon do so it sucks? Why is it okay for Trent Remor to sing, "I want to feel you from the inside," but not okay for KISS to sing, "Let's put the X in sex"? Why is it okay for Collective Soul to grow their hair, but not Cinderella, Wmger, or Mr. Big? Why is it okay for bands today to look and soWld alike, but not okay for, say, a few certain bands (Dokken, Ratt, Def Leppard, etc.) circa 1987? Well? Y'all damn well know what I'm getting atl Just look at M'IV. Look at itt Long, penned hair has been replaced by goatees and dyed crewcuts. Skin-tight leather has been replaced by 20-sizes-too-big denim. And Headbanger's Ball has been replaced by something called Superock . MTV apparently grew tired of all heavy metal bands looking alike, so they replaced them with a bunch of alternative bands that look alike. I realize that trends change - sometimes with surprising quickness. However, I do have a greater attention span than leftover pizza. If something interested me in 1992, I see no reason to stop eIijoying it just because the "next generation" of music fans two or three years younger than myself pollute MTV with something else. Well, since all of the music I still enjoy (YES, I STILL ENJOY '80s METALI GO AHEAD - I DARE YOU TO LAUGH AT MEl!) is labeled, with the worst of intentions, "glam metal" or "hair bands," then it's only fair that I refer to 90 percent of everything after 1993 as "goatee music." Am I sounding like a nostalgic and bitter old man? I can't help it, but I remember when it was okay to write a song about sex. Sex, sex, and more sex! Give me Aerosmith doing it in an elevator, KISS licking it up, and the Scorpions putting the rhythm in it. If R&B artists can still sing about it, then why can't han! rock bands do 80 as well? Even in "this day and age" so many people should not be tremendously afraid of it. Edgar Allan Poe couldn't carry on a fulfilling relationship, and he produced. some of the best literature of all time. Neither could Tchaikovsky, who many con-

Gene Kro.88 1w.8 VE'l')' lrJ1<'1W facial hair. He i8 doi118 the world a favor by not growi118 it. He. i8 neither a creep nor a ro-r, nor i8 he fuU of-a1l8st...

sider to be the greatest composer of all Green Day to sell millions of albums time. Well, Henry Rollins, at 33, simbut it's not okay for Megadeth and ply doesn't feel like "bothering with a Metallica to do so? Up until a few girlfriend or anything like ,that" (to years ago, it seemed that every time a paraphrase a recent RoUing Stone band broke the one million mark, it interview), 80 he just screams some was accused of "selling out." (By the crap he thinks is socially relevant, way, if Metallica's widely-criticlzed and music fans "ooh" and "aah." I, Today's goatee bands are a little too comfurtable telling people how . VI ' ; ;. to vote. Just because some ofthem actually went to college does not I {• ,~'t1f' _ make them trustworthy political 8 analysts. I say put the sex back in the song. Hey, if Billy Corgan gets laid (which he can, as even , . ~. • ~. I 1 politically correct goatee bands "" " .e. _ i ' '\ have sex-hungry groupies), he'll stop whining and his voice might ' , • , ' , . , H even go up a few octaves! 1\ ..~ , _ Yes, all goatee music soWlds -,f t alike. And it's all musically inferior. Intentionally grating, 1,' ,[,; ill"! forced-pitched, blues wannabe I ' '. , ! A ~ , 11 vocals; back~und guitar that These guys are cool. Any questions? sounds like,!l'throat being cleared. with the oo::asionallook-I--can--i!olovideos are a measure of selling out, as-good-as-4iny-metal-guitarist then consider that Green Day already solo; and incredibly amateuriah .(or has three.) Metallica sold out. U2 sold out. The'C .U l'&; 'RE.J.(;."ud Depecbe:',, '.; what goe.~ critics call "raw" or "JJpontaneous") drumwork. Overall the Mode - the excellent bands ' I still "angst" and "emotion" with which this think of when I hear the word "altermusic is supposed to rock comes aa'088 native" - 80ld out. WHY? And who as artificially as a hairpiece. Of course usually does the accusing? Who could it be, I don't know (Church Lady voice). there are some goatee bands that are better than others, but they all have Could it beeee ... goatee bands who fail to sell any records? How the same basic sound. Just as - I conveeeenientl It is as if utter failures admit - all late '80s metal bands are built around the same basic idea. who couldn't get their slacker asses on MTV before, oh, 1991 used the There are, after all, only so many "sellout" label to keep the trends compossibilities. So if someone accuses ing, and once they found their niche, all metal bands of SOWlding alike and goes on to say that Live, Candlebox, then they can sell the millions. The bumper sticker on my car and Bush sound o~erent, they (the one I finally replaced with "Leshould keep in mind that Poison, galize Freedom") reads "Corporate Motley Crue, and the Scorpions, do Rock Still Sucks." Well, I realized not 80Wld exactly alike either. that the only type of music that's not I'm sick and tired of music re"corporate" seems to be 100 percent viewers (RoWng Stone, the Michigan unknown garage, club, and lounge Daily, and, yes, the Michigan Review) acts. People take the recent rise of lauding and praising every college "independent" or "indie" labels to be goatee act that no one has ever heard some kind of a cure for big bureauof or will hear from again while badcracy, and any Tom, Dick, or Weiland mouthing '80s music. The Daily reviewer (I forgot who, but I usually off the stZ'eet who joins such a label is a true artist. Right? Wrong! All it lump them together) who actually apologized for owning Robert Palmer's means is that some incredibly talHeavy Nova (as do millions of others) ented band might not receive the mass recognition it deserves. Hey, it's not went way too far. You know, it's one as if I don't realize the power of the thing when listening to a certain band men wearing the suits. Tony Bennett's gets tiring and you put their albums (as opposed to, say, Mel Torme's or away to take them out again in a year Paul Anka's) recent omnipresence or so. But it's another thing to actuclearly illustrates the power of marally apologize for an entire decade. I keting. But no double standards, have a question. What the HELL did please. IfGuns 'n Roses, who struggled. everyone listen to before there was for years to be recognized, has to be any grunge!?I? Yeah, I thought so! accused of going corporate, then 80 do Why is it okay for Pearl Jam, the out-of-nowhere -Sheryl Crow, Live, and the


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Weezer, and the other goatee bands onMTV'. I am not a bitter old man (I'm only 21) who longs for the days ofhis youth. I did not enjoy receiving detention for chewing gum, having a bedtime instead of a driver'slioense, and being a scrawny junior high geek. But I am old enough, as well as anyone else now in college, to remember when there was no grunge. When rock, pop, dance, metal, rap, country, classical, and alternative were all we had When alternative bands were happy to be called "alternative" just as heavy metal bands were happy to be classified under "metal." Now every new goatee band claims, very pretentiously, to be unique and Wlclassifiable, as ifit invented a new musical style. I remember when people who considered themselves to be "losers" (Beck) or "creeps" (Radiohead) or "hated themselves and wanted to die" (Nirvana, off the Beavis and Bu~ead album) went to the school psychiatrist instead of trying to tap the "angst" they believed everyone aged 18 to 29 to possess. 1 remember ,whenmU8ic was, en~ joyed for what it was, rather than being a "guilty pleasure." That is precisely the attitude with which college magazines are welcoming the slew of the "Best of the '80s" collections. Some reviewers are urging us not to be ashamed of what we once listened to, while others apologize for listening to only what was then available. My question is, "'Vhy the analysis?" Why should listening to the music one enjoys be embarrassing in any way? Why should Quiet Riot, Journey, Whites:nake, Ratt, Lita Ford, Hall and Oates, DefLeppard, the Bangles, Judas Priest, and many other great '80s bands (who sold more records than Tony Bennett even with all the hype and marlreting the coin toss gave him) be treated. as laughing stocks? According to chemistry, all ma tter erodes - but not in five or ten years. Plug in any old cassette and your speakers will produce the same combination of notes that got you to buy that cassette in the first place. (Therefore, an album can't be good in 1985 and suck in 1994, as nO' artist has control of future trends. ) Anyone still ashamed of owning any nongoatee music better be careful not to throw a party that I just might wind up at, for if I find any Wham! , Iron Maiden, Great White, early Slayer, Anthrax, Mr. Mister, Skid Row, or Dokken, you better believe it's going to mysteriously interrupt whatever goatee music might be in progress. There. It's been said. )It



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March 29,1995

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"Beam Me,Up, Vivaldi" BY GREG PARKER


ELL, I MUST ADMIT, I'm not much of a classical music fan. But who can't help but like Vivaldi's Four SeaIJOll8? It's arguably the most quintessential piece of classical music ever written. Everyone likes it - Arnie Roth especiallyadvertis- .",. CompIettt ers, who use The Four SeIsons Four SeaJJOn8 to rep- AmeriClln resent everything Gramephone from Lexus to green L -_ _ _ _- l beans, albeit ad narueum infinitum. '!he music itself defies my humble criticism. Besides, reviews of The Four Sea801l8 are rather commonplace. '!hus, I'll try to concentrate on the unique aspects of The Compleat Four SeaIJOM_I Will say, however, that lead soloist Arnie Roth, along with the Musica Anima strings and Steven Alltop on haxpsichord, is quite a combination. I'm a poor judge of classical technique, but the group's performance sounds flawless to me. This is not just another traditional, prototypical rendition of Vivaldi's masterpiece. When Vivaldi

wrote The Four Sea801I8, he dedicated it to Count Venceslas von Merzin. In the letter of dedication, included in the excellent liner notes, Vivaldi speaks of "Sonnets" that were written for the music. Evidently, these "Sonnets" were meant to be read between movements in the music - to set a theme. A£rording 1X> the liner notes, The Compleat Four Seasons is the only modern recording that includes this poetry. Enter Patrick Stewart. While he is familiar as Captain Jean-Luc Picard of Star Trek: The Next Generotion, he also has performed in more "artsy" productions, such as Hamlet,Juliru Caesar, Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf, and the like. It is Stewart who nattates Vivaldi's "Sonnets." He is articulate, and his Vocal qua,li1{es are more than appropriate for the poetry. He seems to "understand" the"poetry: he expresses the rhythmical content of the poetry well, and more importantly, he

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HAT'S ONE TO SAY about Tangerine Dream? They're hard to describe . Avant garde? Artsy? Pseudo-intellectual? Music? Th~y have always been at the forefront of technology, with electric pi- Tangerine Dream anos, organs, PhNdrI(1974) ves 3 synthesiz- snto.tear (1916) era (of Side Vlr9n of the Moon ' - - - - - - - - - - ' fame), Mellotrons ( a la Moody mues) and Moog (e.g. Emerson, Lake, and Palmer) synthesizers. They also might be the single biggest influenoo on new ambient-teclmo music, much like the Orb or even Ozric Tentacles. In any event, Tangerine Dream has always pushed the envelope of traditional music, and whether or not one finds them in the "New Age," "Jazz," or "Pop" bins at music stores, they've influenced musicians from all those genres of music. I didn't know what to expect when I first put in a Tangerine Dream disc. Here's what I didn't find: percussion, traditional guitars, or even traditional organ parts. I did find, to sum it up in one word, ambiance. I felt a presence. The only problem was that, at first, I listened to Tangerine Dream quietly, not wanting to disturb anyone. But



let me say this: it has to be loud. Crank up the bass. Blowout the speakers. Earth rumbling, glass shattering, eardrum-piercing loud. It's worth it. One must feel Tangerine Dream to fully experience it. And don't let any fools tell you that you have to be high to appreciate this type of ambient music. The music itself, however, does tend to make your mind wander... Tangerine Dream's newer material isn't as ambient or non-traditional as far as rhythm goes. '!his is why I prefer their older albums. Stratosfear aId. Phaedra are both from the mid-seventies, and represent Tangerine Dream well. Both are chock-full of polyrythms. Incredible polyrythms. Don't even try to count the music in time - it's impossible. Various sounds flow around these polyrythms, which are mostly created by varying pulses in the organs and synths. The effect is incredible, and the group understands the abstract concept of polyrythms well. The stereo imaging of both albums is equally incredible. Another hint of advice: dig out the old totalear-covering-seventieer-style headphones. They are the best for this type of music. Of course, turn it up loud, and let your ears bask in the glory of a 21-gun pol yrythmic , ambient, techno saluttl. ~ . . .

reads with passion. While I'm sure the poetry is much more rhythmical and eloquent in its native Italian form, the English translation is decent, and Stewart's abilities surely compensate for this. Interestingly, experts have not come to a conclusion as to who wrote these "Sonnets." Personally, by the tone the aforementioned letter, it sounds as if Vivaldi himself wrote them. The "Sonnets," whoever wrote them, are rhythmically pleasing as well as full of imagery. My favorite line: "In the torrid heat of the blazing sun,lman and beast alike languish, and even the pine trees scorch." It is thematically pastoral, anawhen coupled with various naturalsound effects (i.e. birds chirping, thunder, rain, etc.), it is very tran.quil. The poetry also fits the music welL It sets a mood for the pieces, which often resembles imagery contained in the poetry. It often sounds

like birds chirping, or even emulates a thunderstorm. When the poetry speaks of "peasants celebrating song and dance," I actually envision a group ofproletariat-esque individuals reeling around a Maypole. I have listened to The Four Seasons without the "Son_ nets," and I must say they are an integral part of the music. Like other American Gramaphone products, the disc as a whole is of the highest quality. The packaging is excellent, and the liner notes are, as usual, lengthy, informative, and intriguing. And, as always, the sound quality of the disc is far above average; it is fully digital, and according to the liner, "utilized the latest advances in multitrack digital recording and computer workstation technology." When coupled with modern technology, The Compleat Four Seas01l8 represents the best of the old and the best of the new. '!he musicians are incredible. And the inclusion of Vivaldi's "Sonnets" make this disc unique. In short, it is an essential addition to anyone's library, from di&hard classical aficionado to Pearl Jam freak. Don 't pass this one up. Ml

"Max Roach +Four



AX ROACH IS ONE OF the few bop musicians still alive today. In fact, he still tours, albeit solo, and he still holds drum clinics. It would be quite a treat, to say the least, Max Roach to have the op- ,.,.X .... R'-01._ ~ '-"'WI rllR/I rour portunity to see'Ema let alone be '--_fC_y_ _ _ _--' taught by, the venerable Max Roach. Roach has all the credentials. He helped usher in the first bop revolution, playing with fellow boIr-revolutionary Charlie Parker. Eventually, Roach developed his own quintet, which is greatly representative of the hard-bop school of jazz. Incidentally, hard-bop arrived on the jazz scene as a sort of "response" to the cool jazz genre of the West Coast. While bop spurred cool jazz, cool jazz spurred hard bop. It was a direct reaction to the slower, mid-range cool style, and it came on harder, faster, and funkier than ever. His 1957 work, Max Roach Plru Four, is a testament to this. Many consider Roach to be one of the foremost percussion gurus of the hardbop age. Roach was one of the first to use his drum set as an instrument rather than simply accompaniment. lIi$ SQlos are outJandish, and when he.

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does accompany, he is unequaled. He plays fast, incredibly fast, as typified by his solo on "It Don't Mean a 'llUng (Ifit Ain't Got that Swing)," which is lightning quick. Roach's technique is unparalleled. Rounding out Roach's quintet is Kenny Dorham on trumpet, Ray Bryant and Billy Wallace on piano, George Morrow on bass, and Sonny Rollins on tenor saxophone. Next to Roach, Rollins is probably the most famous of the group. His perlormance on the album is excellent, and represents the hard-bop style in all its facets. Rollins' solos are free-tlowing, fast, and fwious - yet he always is in time. His solos genuinely fit the music, and they work well with Roach's similar style. Max Roach Plru Four on compact disc includes three extra songs not available on the album. All in all, with 60 minutes of music, the disc is an excellent representation ofhard-bop. It also is a treat to hear Roach play with Rollins - though the other members of the quintet are jazzmen of the highest caliber. If nothing else, listen to Max Roach Plus Four for Roach's drumming alone. But don't be disappointed when the other musicians take the spotlight. Sometimes they steal the show. But I'm sure you won't be disappointed. Ml.

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Positive Power With Love Battery


E SIGNED [TO A&M Records] because want to have our own following," explains bassist Bruce Fairweather, referring to Love Battery's potentially dangerous accession from indialand to corporate- love Battery ville. "We've always Straight Flf1IIk played bars and T1ckst small clubs when we A1IaaIA&M were on Sub Pop. Records Now we want to play big venues, tour with bigger bands, have a big single, buy big houses, and be the next big thing." But it wasn't too long ago that all of these things were an almost guaranteed impossibility. In the late eighties vocalistJguitarist Ron Nine, guitarist Kevin Whitworth, drummer Jason Finn, and original bassist Tommy Simpson formed Love Battery in Seattle. "Ron Bays that the band's name definitely did not come from the Buzzcocka' song," says Fairweather, '"but it definitely did." It didn't take the band long to attract attention from their hometown as well as their hometown label, Sub Pop. After a pair of 7" singles, they released Between The Eyes in 1991. A good fOundation for the band's groovy, melodic rock <Fairweather asked me not to call it "grungeadelic"), the album had raw geulslike the title track and "Hjghway of Souls." But Ron was still \working on the vocal performance, and the band was still working on the songs. In 1992, Love Battery's Dayglo continued the upward road to - God furl>id - excellence. The album opened with perhaps the most quintessential Love Battery song, the sludgey, screech-along "Out of Focus." The heavy guitar, ~ed vocals thing began to earn the band a slew of hyphenated journalistic Seattleisms that they have come to hate. "We are really sick of all that crap," says Fairweather. And you would be too if you read their press kit. He continues, "But it doesn't change what we are doing. We don't avoid anything in our music to avoid the comparisons." 1993's Far Gone, the first album to feature Fairweather (fonnerly of Green River and Mother Love Bone) on bass, also marked the first Love Battery album to be consistently rockin' from beginning to end. Unfortunately, it sounds like it was recorded underwater. "I think that Far Gone is a great

album," says Fairweather, '"but we through and through, Straight someroad. Apparently, Ron isn't into lyrididn't realize what it was going to how manages to top Far Gone. Percal reproduction. sound like until it was too late. When . haps it's all of the time they had to "Ron puts a lot of time into his we listened to the playback we said, lyrics," says Fairweather, "but he record, or maybe it's all of record lis'this is going to sound horrible,' but tening parties and corporate thinks that they should be heard and Michael [Beinhom, the producer] inschmooze-ests that has brought Love not read." sisted that it would Appropriately enough, sound great. I think the lyrics you can discern he was trying to go for are colorful and appealingly some experiment in ambiguous. In "Brazil" Ron sound or something. sings, "She shines like a carIt didn't turn out too nival! Swimming through well." my book of dreams/ All I know is all you've learned! Is Regardless, Ron's vocal strainings, all I want to be." But alas, there is some Kevin's spacey leads, bad news. Drummer Jason and the earthy Finn has left Love Battery rhythms of Jason and for his other band, 'Ihe PresiBruce were at an dents of the United States of unsurpassable high, America. Right now they are yet the band still was trying some people out, but ignored. it's pretty obvious that "Yeah, Sub Pop might get you a van to they've got a tough pair of . Love Battery basks in the glow of its own power. tour in but they moregroovy shoes to fill. No matter who is behind the or-less signs' bunch of bands, throw Battery 80 close to perfection: kit, Love Battery will rock your them against a wall, and wait to see The man even gave the guys what sticks." 'panties off Friday, March 31 at st. enough cash to allow a six-page bookAndrew'. Hallln Detroit. Bettie · let for YOlL Six. pages of lyrics? Six The splitting seems less .than Serveert wiD headHne. Ml amicable: A eouple of months ago; the pagesofband phCltoe? No, aixpages .of Sub Pop publicity department wouldn't even tell me what label Love Battery was on. Alas, A&M it is, and they seem to be enjoying it. For the first time, Love Battery was allowed to make demo recordings of their songs before recording the album. However, "Illuminated Man" was good enough to make it to Nehru Jacket, the four-aong EP, while "Drowning Sun" made it to Straight Freak Thket, the LP that came out a mere few weeks later. With boatloads of good press and a video for "Fuzz Factory" now gracing M'IV, Love Battery seems to be on its way. And with good reason too. 'Ihe production, courtesy of Bruce Calder (Green River, George Clinton, and Miles Davis), finds the happy medium between the annoyingly lowfi. and the overly glossy. And although they stay true to their raw-rock root, they definitely had enough time to play around with different instruments, different sounds, and more diverse songs. If so, then join the Michigan Review. We are looking for Fairweather readily admits that Straight "is our best so far. Ron's wri ters, researchers, photographers, business staffers, voice is better, the songs are better ... and editors. The only qualifications area desire for knowlwe had so much more time to put into edge and a love for liberty. Weekly staff meetings are on it." With Ron's perfectly repetitive Tuesday at 7 p.m. on the third floor of the Michigan chorus and one of Love Battery's first League. For more information about the Review, feel free pop songs, "Red Onion" reeks of a radio hit. But""Angelhead" keeps with to call the of fice at 662-1909, or e-mail"" Love Battery's muddy, mid-tempo semi-psychedelic jams. There is plenty of diversity on this album. And


Are You a Thinking Individual?