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March 2012


IRISH CARB OMBS

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Front page photo taken by Michael Finney at It’s Vegas Baby! - Blue Chip Casino

Eddie Padin   Publisher Michael Finney  

Lakeshore Operations

Sam Mechling  

Staff Writer

Paige Turner  

Staff Writer

Stephanie Vega  

Staff Writer

Ralph Heibutzki

Staff Writer

Brian Martin 

Contributing Writer

Lisa Trimboli  

Contributing Writer

Matt Scearce  

Graphic Designer

Jeanette Cherry   

Graphic Designer

Jonathan R. Lessans    Jason Mabie  Juan Cahue  

Photographer 

Photographer Web Design

Distribution: Michiana Entertainer magazine is distributed to over 500 drop points including bars, restaraunts, and retail establishments in Berrien, Elkhart, La Porte, & St. Joseph Counties. To add your bar or nightclub as a drop point & join our printed and online directory email: ContactUs@MichianaEntertainer.Com Be sure to include: Name of Bar, Adddress, City, State and Phone Number. Editorial Policies: Michiana Entertainer Magazine covers a variety of different editorial elements some of which are satire and for humorous interests only. Some views are submitted and in no way are a representation of the views, interests, or opinions of the Publisher. Michiana Entertainer is a monthly publication by Michiana Entertainer LLC. All rights reserved. Reproduction without permission is strictly prohibited. All photographs and articles submitted become the sole property of Michiana Entertainer LLC.

Advertising & Submissions: Michiana Entertainer LLC

6212 US Hwy 6 | Suite 169

bud light aluminum bottles bailey’s irish cream

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dtsb tent party and pub tour: official tour guide

stillshot

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Our Team

suds and cocktails

26 29 32

dtsb st. paddy’s day pub tour map after the dtsb tent party michiana music:

special edition

king pao simple crush

michiana mix lambright premier entertainment

bars in the region puzzles streetsmarts spring clean your life

34

news from around the world

40

woman’s point of view

46

spring flinging

featured bartenders

casey at bleachers - mishawaka tasha at madison oyster bar - s. bend

47

bartender of the month

jen at frank’s place - south bend

51

cocktails of the month

Portage, IN 46368

(888) 512-0881

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March 2012


Cheers pub - south bend

at:

A Painless Birth A couple went to the hospital to have a baby. The doctor told them that he had invented a new machine that would automatically transfer a portion of the mother’s labor pain to the father. He asked if the husband was willing to try it out. Both the husband and wife were very much in favor of it. The doctor set the knob at 10% for starters, explaining that even 10% was probably more pain than the father had ever experienced before. But, as labor progressed, the doctor then adjusted the machine to 20% pain transfer. The husband was still feeling fine. The doctor checked the husband’s blood pressure and pulse and was amazed at how well he was doing. At this, they decided to try for 50%. The husband continued to feel quite well. Since it was obviously helping out his wife considerably, he encouraged the doctor to transfer ALL the pain to him. The wife delivered a healthy baby with virtually no pain. She and her husband were ecstatic. When they got home, they found the mailman dead on the porch.

Scan the Tag with your mobile phone to visit the Shock Top Mobile website & download the ShockTop App

Get the free mobile app at

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Celebrating Right with St. Patty’s Bud Light

F

or well over 100 years, Budweiser has been among the world’s bestselling beers and as a product of Anheuser-Busch, the largest brewing company in the United States, it’s no wonder that they’re ranked as highly as they are. Budweiser has given us over a dozen great tasting types of beer and although nothing new has been introduced from their line since 2009’s Bud Light Golden Wheat and 2008’s Bud Light Lime, the varieties they’ve already produced are enough to keep anyone busy. However, for those drinkers out there who are always itching for something new, recently announced Bud Light Platinum should grab your attention. This slightly sweeter tasting beer will be appearing in dark blue 12-ounce bottles and it’s frothy taste and appealing facts will definitely put it in competition with the original Budweiser choices. This “upscale light beer option” will contain slightly more calories but less carbs than even top-selling Bud Light and the extra

Suds & Cocktails By: Paige Turner

punch provided by the additional alcoholic content (which is 6% in this new Platinum brew). The jump from the alcohol by volume of 4.2% in Bud Light and 5% for regular Budweiser is a significant one and goes to show that drinkers are becoming more interested in maximizing their fun while minimizing the effects on their wallets and waistlines. By continuing to provide these new ABV options with the same easy drinkability as the older and more familiar styles, long-time fans of Budweiser brands in general will find little to complain about with this new addition. Change isn’t always easy but it’s a part of life and luckily this new change in the Budweiser line-up will improve our drinking sessions rather than anything else. If you’re looking for something stronger yet just as easy to imbibe as your old trusty favorites, reach for the new cobalt blue bottle and give it a shot. Regardless of your age or favorite type of beer, you may soon realize that an entirely new demographic has been enticed by the sheen of Bud Light Platinum.

Visit the Bud Light Facebook Page

Get the free mobile app at

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Enjoy a Taste of the Irish with Bailey’s Irish Cream

T

here are many ways to celebrate St. Patrick’s Day and drinking adult beverages always seems to be one of the most popular. Many people will be tossing back Guinness by the end of the night but to those who want to honor their Irish roots from the moment they wake up, Bailey’s Irish Crème is a good place to start. Easy to enjoy on its own, this liqueur can also add a subtle kick to your morning coffee or even be mixed with various other spirits to form great-tasting cocktails.

Created by Gilbeys of Ireland, Bailey’s was the first Irish cream was introduced to the market in 1974 and is still produced in Dublin today. This Irish whiskey and cream based liqueur might not sound like a winning combination but the taste results in a deliciously creamy and frothy beverage that mixes well with both hot and cold drinks or can even pack a punch when added to desserts. With an ABV of 17%, this is definitely stronger than chocolate milk and will disappear just as fast. The crème used in the drink comes from Glanbia, an Irish dairy company, and that aspect should not deter you from purchasing a bottle or two. With a shelf life of 30 months and a guarantee on its taste for 2 years from the date it was made (opened or unopened, regardless of whether it was stored in a refrigerator or not so long as it is stored away from direct sunlight), you would have to make an effort to not finish any bottles you happen to have on hand. The creamy, rich taste of Bailey’s Irish Crème will add sweetness to your nightcap or a jolt to your morning coffee and can be so addicting you might want to make it a daily treat. No matter how you take it, this holiday wouldn’t be complete without a little Bailey’s in your bottle. And if you have enough, it will definitely add a spring to your step! March 2012

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Bleacher’s - mishawaka

Slow Golfers Two men were having an awfully slow round of golf because the two ladies in front of them managed to get into every sand trap, lake, and rough on the course. They didn’t bother to wave the men on through, which is proper golf etiquette. After two hours of waiting and waiting, one man said, “I think I’ll walk up there and ask those gals to let us play through.” He walked out the fairway, got halfway to the ladies, stopped, turned around, and came back, explaining, “I can’t do it. One of those women is my wife and the other is my mistress! Maybe you’d better go talk to them.” The second man walked toward the ladies, got halfway there and, just as his partner had done, stopped, turned around and walked back and said: “Small world.”

OPEN 3pm-3am

1516 N. Ironwood South Bend, IN 574-855-2365

St. Patricks Day Party March 17th

Catch March Madness On One of Our Many Hi Def Tv's

Pool, Darts, & Golden Tee Live 32oz Domestic Drafts Mon-Thurs: $3.50

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March 2012


Fireside - Edwardsburg, MI Smartest Parrot in the World This guy decides that maybe he’d like to have a pet and goes to a pet shop. After looking around, he spots a parrot sitting on a little perch. It doesn’t have any feet or legs. The guy says out loud, “Geez, I wonder what happened to this parrot?” “I was born this way,” says the parrot. “I’m a defective parrot.” “Ha, ha,” the guy laughs. “It sounded like this parrot actually understood what I said and answered me!” “I understood every word,” says the parrot. “I am a highly intelligent, thoroughly educated bird.” “Yeah?” the guy asks. “Then answer this: how do you hang onto your perch without any feet?” “Well,” the parrot says, “this is a little embarrassing, but since you asked I’ll tell you. I wrap my little parrot penis around this wooden bar, kind of like a little hook. You can’t see it because of my feathers.” “Wow,” says the guy, “you really can understand and answer, can’t you?” “Of course! I speak both Spanish and English. I can converse with reasonable competence on almost any subject: politics, religion, sports,physics, philosophy and I am especially good at ornithology. You ought to buy me. I’m a great companion.” The guy looks at the $200 price tag. “I can’t afford that,” he says. “Pssst,” the parrot hisses, motioning the guy over with one wing. “Nobody wants me cause I don’t have any feet. You can get me for $20. Just make an offer!” The guy offers 20 dollars and walks out with the parrot. Weeks go by. The parrot is sensational. He’s funny, he’s interesting, he’s a great pal, he understands everything, sympathizes, gives good advice. The guy is delighted. One day the guy comes home from work and the parrot says, “Pssst,” and motions him over with one wing. The guy goes up close to the cage. “I don’t know if I should tell you this or not”, says the parrot, “but it’s about your wife and the mailman” “What?” says the guy. “Well,” the parrot says, “when the mailman came to the door today your wife greeted him in a sheer nightgown and kissed him on the mouth.” “What happened then?” asks the guy. “Then the mailman came into the house and lifted up her nightgown and began petting her all over,” reports the parrot. “My God!” the guy cries. “Then what?” “Then he got down on his knees and began to lick her body, starting with her breasts and slowly going down and down.” The parrot pauses for a long time..... “What happened? What happened?” says the frantic guy. “I don’t know,” says the Parrot. “My d*ck got hard and I fell off my perch.”

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Downtown South BenD

10th

ST. PADDY’S TENT PARTY ANNUAL annual & PUB TOUR Friday, March 16 • 5 pm Corner of wayne & S. Michigan Streets

annual

nnual a After Party at Club Fever with

Simple Crush • 11 pm

Free trolley Rides to 16 Pubs 5:30 pm – 12:30 am

$

5 Admission Tent Party 5 - 11 pm must be 21 or older

paddyparty.com Xtreme Fun pg 10

Party

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South Bend SilverhawkS

Emblazon SALON

Blue Ribbon

Taxi

March 2012


DTSB Tent Party & Pub Tour

By: Stephanie Vega

T

he holiday we all become Irish for is being spread over two days in downtown South Bend. The reason why? One of the biggest events in the area is taking place on the eve of the infamous beer drinking holiday. The Annual Downtown South Bend Tent Party and Pub Tour is always held on the Friday before St. Patrick’s Day, but since this year the holiday falls on a Saturday, Michiana bar go-er’s get to enjoy two big days of partying, especially since this is the 10th year for the DTSB Tent Party. “We’re really excited about this year’s event because we have a record number 16 pubs participating, plus one for after hours” said Julie Curtis, Director of Marketing, for Downtown South Bend Inc. “And we’re going to utilize a larger tent than we have in the past so that will allow us to have an increased capacity.” The Tent Party gets started on Friday, March 16th at 5:00pm and goes until 11pm. $5 gets you in, and once inside, you’ll enjoy food, beer and of course, live entertainment. “We’ll have a cash bar going, and it will be a full bar, not just green beer,” said Curtis. “We’ll also have corned beef sandwiches, two bands, a free photo booth and a hair salon that will bedoing festive hair do’s.” So let’s break it down a bit: As Curtis stated, there will be green beer on tap, and 20oz. draft beers are going to cost you $4 while alumnimum bottles of Bud and Budlight will cost you $5. If beer isn’t what you want to drink, no worries, 12oz. mixed drinks and wine will be on hand for $4. Xtreme Fun Party Company will be taking free festive photos of tent-goers and Emblazon Salon will be doing fun updos, green extensions and spray painting hair. WRBR’s Tommy Carroll will be MCing the event in the tent and will surely keep the party going. The group King Pao will take the stage at 5:30pm and they will be followed by Stillshot at 8:00pm. “It is such a fun event, and people really get decked out,” said Curtis. “We draw a crowd of about 4,000 every year and we are hoping for an even bigger crowd this year.” Now that we’ve heard about the Tent Party, let’s talk about that Pub Tour, and how those coming out for this event not will get to truly enjoy a night out on the town. “We offer free trolley rides from 5:30 until 12:30 so people can take full advantage of the pub tour,” said Curtis. “The tent party in on the west side of the river, but we have pubs participating on both the west and east side so this gives everyone a chance to check out all the bars. Many make it their mission to get to all of them.” So want to know a little bit about the bars participating in this year’s event? Well, be prepared for quite the list:

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The Vine

103 W. Colfax Avenue Joining the pub tour this year is the Vine - known for its casual, yet upscale dining experience – the bar will offer up all sorts of beverages for your liking. The bar has an extensive wine menu and offers up classic cocktails, but for this St. Patty’s day weekend will have favorites on hand for the occasion. If you’re looking for a friendly place to enjoy your drink, don’t forget to make a stop at the Vine! To learn more about the Vine, go to www.thevinesb.com

CJ’s Pub

236 South Michigan Street Coming back for a second year is CJ’s Pub, located on the corner of Michigan and Wayn. Nationally known for their delicious burgers and great party atmosphere, CJ’s will certainly not dissappoint. Since their leprechaun piss went over so well last year, they will be bringing it back again. At CJ’s the drinks will be flowing and fun times will be had by all. CJ’s offers up daily drink and food specials. To learn more about their specials, and what they’ll be offering up at this year’s party, check them out at www.cjs-pub.com and on Facebook.

Frank’s Place

appetizers and frozen pizza will be served until 3am. For more information on Frank’s Place, check them out at www.franksplacesb.com.

327 West Marion Street No stranger to the tent party is Frank’s Place. Having participated every year since the DTSB Tent Party started, Frank’s Place offers up its guests a true Irish experience. “We will have corned beef and cabbage sandwich for $8.95 and we will also have a reuben and just a regular corned beef sandwich,” said Leslie McCurdy, Manager of Frank’s Place. “We will have green bud light on draft, and of course, their will be no cover charge.” The bar, which has been a family owned and operated business for about 36 years, prides itself in being South Bend’s original neighborhood pub and looks forward to this annual event. “The tent party always bring a lot of new faces out,” said McCurdy. “And because the party is closer to St. Patty’s Day, I think we’re going to be busy.” Taking the stage at Frank’s Place will be the band Acoustically Speaking at 8pm. For those looking for a bite to eat and aren’t interested in the St. Patty’s Day classics, the full menu will be available and pg 12

A group of tent partee goers lounge around at Agave53

Corby’s Irish Pub

441 East La Salle Avenue Another establishment no stranger to the DTSB Tent Party bar tour is Corby’s Irish Pub - who has been involved since the beginning. Known for their pub style food and beverages, Corby’s is going to focus on the boozin’ this year. They’ll be bringing back a favorite amongst many from last year -the festive St. Patrick’s Day green alumnimum Bud and Bud Light bottles. They also plan on pouring a ton of green beer on tap; offering up $6 green pitchers and $3 16 oz. cups. If drinking beer, and more beer is one your list of priorities for this event, be sure to hit up this festive and traditional Irish Pub. To learn more about Corby’s, be sure to check them out at www.facebook.com/corbysirishpub.

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March 2012


Agave53

119 North Michigan Street New to the DTSB Pub Tour this year is Agave53. South Bend’s new Mexican Restaurant offers mouth watering tapas as well as 53 different kinds of tequila. They are being called South Bend’s first tequila bar, as the drink combinations are endless with 53 tequilas on hand. Agave53 is taking part in this Irish themed event and is offering up a little taste of Mexico. If you want a little latin flare in your festivities, than a stop at Agave53 is one worth making. For more information, go to www. agave53.com.

Madison Oyster Bar 129 North Main Street

It’s one of their biggest nights of the year, and it’s the reason why Madison Oyster Bar is taking part in the Pub Tour once again. The party at Madison’s is spreadout through the three levels of this faciltiy, and on each floor you’ll find a fun and exciting party. With plenty of beer flowing from the taps, you can bet there’s plenty of festive celebrating that will be going on. Find out more about Maidosn Oyster Bar at www.madisonoysterbar. com.

Trio’s Restaurant & Jazz Club 128 North Main Street

Maybe not the first thing you think of when it comes to a traditional Irish party, but Trio’s Restaurant and Jazz Club sure knows how to throw a St. Patty’s Day party! First opening their doors in the fall of 2007, this establishment may be known for their American Cuisine but it’s their live jazz entertainment which sets them

DJ Eric “Street” Oberhoeffer mixers it up at last year’s tent party apart from the rest, and it’s why you’ll want to stop in there and experience it this year during the DTSB Tent Party Pub Tour. Taking the stage at Trio’s will be Typhanie Monique, a vocalist who does everything from jazz and funk to hip-hop and freestyle, this rising star has achieved international status and has lead groups such as Typhanie Monique & Neal Alger Duo, the T. Monique Quartert, SUMO, Peking Turtle and Mr. Egg Germ. Want to know more about this performance or what else Trio’s has to offer? Check them out www. triossb.com.

Sean O’Casey’s Trio’s Jazz Lounge

March 2012

123 N. Saint Joseph Street Looking for that Irish Pub feel this St.

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Pub Tour Attendee’s line up to begin their route! Patty’s weekend? Then you’ll want to hop on the trolley and head on over to Sean O’Casey’s. The pub, located inside the Double Tree (the old Marriott) took part in the Pub Tour last year and didn’t want to miss out on the opportunity this year. “We had a really good turnout so we knew it was something we wanted to be apart of,” said Chris Johnson, Manager of the Double Tree Hotel and Sean O’Casey’s. “So we’ll have 10 taps flowing freely.” They may not have the traditional green beer flowing, but they’ll have a variety of local micro-brews on tap, as well as domestics. Irish music will be playing in the pub and they will have appetizer type foods available. “Since we are expecting a big crowd, we want to offer easy snack food,” said Johnson. “We don’t want those coming in having to wait 30 or 40 minutes for food. We want them to be able to get a quick snack and enjoy it while they drink.” To learn more about Sean O’Casey’s and all the new things going on at the Double Tree, go to www. doubletree.com/seanocaseys or visit them on Facebook at Double Tree by Hilton, South Bend.

year, but is in part, partnering up with the DTSB. “We are partnering with the Magnuson Grand and they are offering hotel packages for anyone who wants to spend the night,” said Julie Curtis, Director of Marketing, for Downtown South Bend Inc. “And they are offering reasonable rates. For $89 you get a room and you get two free drink tickets into the Cellar Door.” One of Michiana’s newest restauratns, the Cellar Door offers an exquisite place for you to enjoy a drink in style and class. If you want a take a step in an atmosphere said to take your breathe away, then make a trolley stop at the Cellar Door, and if you want to spend the night, make this your last stop! For more information of the

Cellar Door

213 West Washington Street Located inside the new Magnuson Grand Hotel, the Cellar Door is not only taking part in the Pub Tour this pg 14

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A couple performs in Irish Jig at Vickies Bar

March 2012


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hotel, go to www.paddyparty.com and click on the stay overnight tab.

East Bank Emporium Restaurant 121 South Niles Avenue

Overlooking the East Race waterway, the East Bank Emporium restaraunt is located inside the Emporium shopping center. Offering a wide array of food and drink, the East Bank Emporium restaraunt also caters to the senses with its traditional oak doors and grand staircase. More info on drink and food specials can be found at: www.eastbankemporium.com

Blarney Stone

113 East Wayne Street What was once a library is now a three story building offering up an atmosphere like none other, and that could be what makes the Blarney Stone such a popular stop on the Pub Tour. For the sixth year, the Blarney Stone is participating in the event, offering up food and drink for those making a stop here. This bar, which is a popular spot amongst college students, will be a hot spot on the Pub Tour as well. Want to know more on what’s going on? Check them out on Facebook.

*Vickie’s Bar

112 West Monroe Street They say the third times the charm and if that’s the case, you can expect a great party over at Vickie’s Bar. This is the third year the bar is participating in the DTSB Pub Tour and if history repeats itself, this establishment will be a busy stop for those participating in the tour. With the alcohol sure to be flowing at Vickie’s, you can bet making a stop here for a drink and a bite to eat should be on your list of things to do. Serving up Reuben’s at last years event, this year will surely have more delicious sandwiches

Club LaSalle

115 West Colfax Avenue If you’re looking to enjoy a cocktail and maybe a cigar, you might want to head on over to Club LaSalle. Known for their plush sofas, live music and loungy atmosphere, this chic hot spot is a favorite for barpg 16

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March 2012


goers. Club LaSalle offers a selection of premium cigars inside their Cigar Parlor, and makes for a great destination not only for this party but any day. To learn more about all they offer, go to www.lasallegrill.com.

Tippecanoe Place

620 West Washington Street Set in a mansion originally owned by the Studebakers, this location has 100 year tradition of fine dining for the South Bend area. The mansion boasts over 40 rooms littered with nostalgia and antiques. The traditional atmosphere adds a certain charm to this breathtaking location. Serving traditional Irish mainstays as well as an extensive wine list this location provides an remniscent breath of old Gaelic times. You can visit them online at: www.tippe.com

Club Fever

222 South Michigan Street

Party and they are offering no cover for those coming in with their wristbands on. If you don’t have a wristband, it’ll cost you $5 to get in, still half the cost of a normal Friday night at Club Fever. Be prepared for the alcohol to continue to flow, and taking the stage at Club Fever is the band Simple Crush. Last year, the club saw nearly 600 DTSB party goers, so if you plan on going, you may want to show up when the doors open. The party won’t stop until 3am. For more information, call (574) 2320222 or check them out at www.clubfever.biz. You can also keep reading about them in the DTSB Pub Tour Afterparty article in this issue!

Still want to know more about the DTSB Tent Party? Check them out at www.paddyparty.com.

Get the free mobile app at

http:/ / gettag.mobi

Scan the Tag & download an interactive copy of the 10th Annual DTSB St. Paddy’s Day Pub Tour Map directly to your smartphone!

Club Fever is the official after party of the DTSB Tent March 2012

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

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5 MARION MARIO

CEDAR

P = PARKING

MADISON

LOTS/GARAGES

MADISON

9

TAYLOR R

P 3

P

JEFFERSON

HILL

P9

NILES

P 4

SYCAMORE

7

T JO J S ST. JOSEPH

WASHINGTON

6

10 HIGAN GAN MICHIGAN

COLFAX

MAIN

LAFAYETTE

TAYLOR

WILLIAM

LASALLE

8

11

P

WAYNE

P

JEFFERSON ER RSO

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1 P WESTERN

P 2

MONROE

Trolley Stops 8. The View & The

1. Tent Party

Emporium

2. Vickie’s Bar 3. Sean O’Casey’s

9. Corby’s

4. The Cellar Door

10. LaSalle Grille, The Vine, Trio’s & Agave 53

5. Frank’s Place 6. Tippecanoe Place 7. Madison Oyster Bar

11. Backstage Grill/Club Fever, Blarney Stone & CJ’s Pub

Trolleys run from 5:30 p.m. - 12:30 a.m. Trolley rides are free to Tent Party participants

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March 2012


after The Tent Party

The Party continues at

Club Fever

Friday | March 2nd

Alligator Blackbird, Midwest Hype and The Beat Friday | March 9th

Primer 55 w/ Arson Radio, Divided We Fall, Apophis & 15 Stories Friday | March 16th

DTSB Official After Party w/ Simple Crush Sunday | March 25th

The Wailers Friday | March 30th

My Darkest Days & Pop Evil Friday | April 20th

Johnny Winter Friday | Apr 29th

Theory of a Deadman

March 2012

H

opefully you didn’t give up green beer for Lent, because if so, we’re going to have a problem here. It’s the time of year when shamrocks and rainbows appear and if you’re lucky, maybe the pot of gold at the end of the rainbow. It’s also the ultimate excuse to re-discover your inner Irish (we all have one) and get drunk. This isn’t the St. Paddy’s day monthly practice, it’s the real deal. The 10th annual downtown South Bend St. Paddy’s day tent party kicks off at 5pm on Friday, March 16th and it’s going to be ten times more awesome than previous years. But it’s what you do after the party ends at 11pm that counts.

plan on hitting the after party scene early. The trolley will be running between all the locales involved in the pub tour for all you stumbling drunks unable to make the walk. Did you blow all your cash at the tent? No worries because there’s no cover charge at Club Fever. Simple Crush will be in the house along with a plethora of drink specials courtesy of your favorite bartenders at Michiana’s most beloved nightclub. The Backstage Grill will have food specials all week long so save some room for dinner before hitting the tent. Club Fever has recently updated their sound and lights system and “there is no one in the Michiana area that comes close to it,” says Vic Mann, Club Fever’s general manager. If you’ve seen some of the recent kickass shows Fever has hosted, including Bad Boy Bill & The Crystal Method just a few weeks ago, you know what we’re working with here folks.

While the tent party will be wrapping up the night will have just begun. The official downtown South Bend St. Paddy’s day afterparty is at Club Fever and they’re just a walk away from the tent. Doors open at 10pm in case you

Club Fever is located at 222 S. Michigan Street in downtown South Bend. To stay current on their event schedule you can text FEVER to 72727 or visit them online at www.clubfever. biz.

Every Friday Club Fever is also hosting tons of your favorite live bands throughout the next few months including Alligator Blackbird, Midwest Hype and The Beat on Friday March 3rd, Primer 55 and Arson Radio on Friday March 9th, Shock Roxy on Friday March 23rd and My Darkest Days (“Porn Star Dancing”) on Friday, March 30th.

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

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March 2012


stillshot: Rocking The Tent

S

tillshot founder/frontman Rob Yocom can always tell when spring is just around the corner – and not just because his band has become a fixture of the St. Paddy’s Day Tent Party & Pub Tour, which Downtown South Bend is presenting for its tenth year. To get a sense of how much the event means around the area, Yocom only needs to look no further than his computer. “I posted on my Facebook about a week ago, and already, 15 people said they couldn’t wait. It’s almost like another Halloween, except it’s in the spring. It (the temperature) may be only in the 40s and 50s, but at least it’s not the 20s. People have been inside for four or five months, so they’re itching to get out and have some fun,” he said. Yocom and company will perform as part of the party, which runs from 5 to 11 p.m. Friday, March 16, at 350 S. Michigan Ave., South Bend (corner of Wayne and South Michigan). Admission for the tent party is $5, and is good for free access to the ever-popular pub tour that’s also become a popular trademark of the event. For more information, visit DTSB at www.paddyparty.com/, www.facebook. com/pages/Stillshot/, or www.stillshotonline.com/. This year’s event – which also features performances by King Pao, and Simple Crush – marks Stillshot’s sixth consecutive appearance as a featured attraction, and its third straight year as headliner. Given that status, Yocom expects Stillshot to put out an exciting, high-energy show that should keep people talking for a long time. “For us, it’s definitely one of the most fun and entertaining events that we do. Last year, we picked up some kilts, and wore them onstage,” said Yocom, laughing. “We consider ourselves fortunate to be invited back to headline this event. It’d be easy for

March 2012

By: Ralph Heibutzki |

them (the DTSB management) to say, “Well, you’ve had a great run, and now it’s time to move on.’” Focusing on music from the ‘70s through the ‘90s, Stillshot prides itself on its arranging abilities – and willingness to push the envelope, in terms of drawing up a setlist. “We’ve always tried to be a little bit edgy in our song selection, and take some risks,” said Yocom. “It’s become our calling card. There’s a certain list of cover songs that everybody plays – songs like ‘Sweet Home Alabama,’ and ‘Brown-Eyed Girl,’ those types of songs that everybody wants to hear. We try to pick songs that are a little bit different.” A great deal of thought and effort goes into making those song choices pay off, as Yocom explains. “We definitely try to keep up with current rock ‘n’ roll, whether it’s Papa Roach, or Muse, things like that – also, some of the classics, like Rage Against The Machine,” said Yocom. “We do some ‘80s rock, but not stuff like Motley Crue – we’ll do stuff from Billy Idol, or Prince, for instance. We do some sequencing of keyboards and horns, to add that extra stuff that you can’t get with a four-piece band.” The payoff comes onstage, where the crowd gets to see something that wouldn’t happen anywhere else – because they’re taking part in one of South Bend’s defining events, in Yocom’s eyes. “We try to bring a little different sort of show to this event. We always try to do something special, as opposed to our normal club show. We try and bring on the energy and get the crowd going, make it more of a concert-type atmosphere,” he said.

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

pg 21


King Pao:

Get PAO’d at the Tent Paty By: Ralph Heibutzki | Photos courtesy of Blue Print Photography

F

orget about deeper meanings, or easy answers to the world's problems: King Pao's manifesto happens to focus around a simpler, straightforward goal – namely, bringing a strong dose of “serious fun” for those who experience them live. What other reason is needed?

The band makes those intentions clear in a brief biography posted on its Facebook page: “Some of us started making music to get attention. The rest for the love of the melody, but we've all been playing professionally and lovin' it since we were in our teens.” That's the rationale behind a songlist that ranges from '60s heroes (The Mamas & The Papas), to '70s old school funk (The Jacksons), '80s hard rock (Guns 'N' Roses) and New Wave (Blondie) – augmented by a healthy dose of such current favorites as Lady Gaga, Jason Mraz and Sublime, to name a few name-drops from its recent playlists. That kind of mixture has often prompted singer-guitarist Scott Ryan to jokingly refer to King Pao (pronounced “Pow”) as a “pseudoacoustic” band, because of his desire not to leave the electric aspect behind altogether – even though the unplugged route is a prominent part of its approach. Those who haven't experienced King Pao's sensibility will see for themselves at the St. Paddy's Day Tent Party & Pub Tour, which runs from 5 to 11 p.m. Friday, March 16, at 350 S. Michigan Ave., South Bend, IN (at the corner of Wayne and South Michigan). For many South Bendpg 22

ers, the party marks an unofficial kickoff to spring – and one likely reason why it's grown from 2,000 to 5,000 people during its 10-year history. Admission to the tent party is $5, but you must be 21 to enter, and will ensure free access to the pub tour. For more information, visit DTSB's page, www.paddyparty.com/, http://www.facebook.com/ pages/King-Pao/, or the band's official website, kingpao.com/. Ryan founded the band a couple years ago, when he decided that the contractor's life didn't suit him anymore – so he had to jump back into music full-time again. The band's other core members include Karol Krueger (lead vocals), Jay McDaniel (guitar, bass and vocals), and Eric King (drums) – for whom the band is named, according to Ryan. King Pao helps to keep Ryan busy when his other major band, Blammo, isn't working – so, when circumstances and schedules dictate, he'll also work as a duo with Krueger, or unplug the trio, with help from other drummers (Ed Christensen, Jimmy Colford). As Ryan told Michiana Entertainer readers in September 2010, that kind of willingness to adapt is what's helped him make a full-time living out of music – a mission that began when he started playing bars at age 15: “Nothing else matters if you want to do something that bad – there’s either that, or selling out to a day job that made me miserable. I’m living pretty cheap, and it’s working so far. I’m very fortunate.”

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

March 2012


Keeping the Party Rolling

E

By: Ralph Heibutzki | Photos courtesy of Side Street Studio Photography

verybody loves a party, and as long as Simple Crush has a say in the matter, all those who show up will leave feeling that they got more than their money’s worth – and then some. That’s the simple declaration posted on the five-piece band’s website, www.simplecrush.net, which states: “We love a good party and we are here to keep yours rolling! Beginning to end, Simple Crush will keep you on your feet and singing your favorite song!” That favorite song, as Simple Crush’s Youtube clips demonstrate, can vary considerably – from “I Want You To Want Me” (Cheap Trick), faithfully rendered to its closing drum breakdown, to “Summer Of ‘69” (Bryan Adams), “These Boots Are Made For Walkin’” (Nancy Sinatra) and that perennial bar band standard, “Brown-Eyed Girl” (Van Morrison), rounded out by a brief bass solo that the song’s creator most likely never envisioned. With two guitarists in the lineup, Simple Crush can cover whatever type of lead playing is needed to make its style on such well-known songs – while lead singer Patti Turner

March 2012

injects the right combination of ability and attitude to her own performances. Simple Crush will perform as part of the St. Paddy’s Day Tent Party & Pub Tour, organized by Downtown South Bend (DTSB), at 9 p.m. on Friday, March 16. The band will be playing the event’s After Party at Club Fever, 222 W. Michigan St., South Bend, IN. For further information, visit the club at http://www.clubfever.biz. For those who haven’t caught the fever, and heeded the band’s command to “Get Crushed!”, the After Party should make an appropriate introduction to the style that’s made Simple Crush into an established local favorite. Judging by the comments in Simple Crush’s guestbook, that message seems to be coming across loud and clear, as this entry makes plain: “As a seeker of quality music I must tell you that you drew me in. I believe you have captured the hearts of all who heavily seek libations in a social arena. Your female lead singer is a breath of fresh air by the way. Wow!!” What else needs to be said, except: “Let the good times roll”?

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

pg 23


Michiana Mix

Entertainment & Value: Lambright meets expectations Anyone can collect money, but success in the entertainment business also means giving people the best value for their dollar. That’s the stance of Lambright Premiere Entertainment, a new DJ and event planning company whose goal is to raise expectations for the local scene – while leaving those who hire them feeling great about the choice they’ve just made. That’s the philosophy of Brian Lambright, who formed the company in November 2011 as an outlet for his MAJOR passions of business, and music. He himself is a DJ who acquired those skills during an eight-year U.S. Army career that saw him serve in Afghanistan, Germany, Iraq and Libya. Lambright continues to pay tribute to his military roots as DJ Sergeant Keebz, who – between his own gigs at bars, school dances and weddings – gives back to the community by hosting charity events, mentoring children, and volunteering. pg 24

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

March 2012


Lambright Entertainment Presents:

! a i v i r T m a Te

Michiana Mix but in the sense of getting a full value.” All of those expectations are spelled out on Lambright’s website, which says that customers will get a DJ or MC with a wireless microphone; at least of four hours of continuous music; and a selection of 40,000 or more songs that can be customized to the customer’s taste, right down to assisting clients in creating “play” or “do not play” lists for their events. “A lot of DJs have their specific genres, and they don’t want to cater to a client,” said Washington, of the latter service. “But Brian understands there’s a difference between doing a club, and doing a wedding – and that, when you’re doing a wedding, you need to have some age appropriate music. Lambright also offers video jockey services, which is one strength that DJ Motto (Manuel Ortiz-Ramos) – who’s now working with the company – brings to its operations, according to Washington. “He’s been a DJ in the area for two or three years. He’s more of a club DJ. He likes to keep a young sort of feel to his shows,” said Washington.

“I just want to do something for people that brings them a little bit of fun. I always try to go the extra mile, to make sure the client is happy with the services that I provide,” he said. (For more details on Lambright’s own DJ activities, visit http://www.sgtkeebz.com/.) When Lambright formed the company, he asked longtime friend, Philip Washington, to give him a hand Both are South Bend, IN residents, who also graduated together from Adams High School. As the founder, Lambright sets the company’s overall direction, while Washington oversees the design for its main website, http://www.lambrightpremiereentertainment.com/, along with its flyers, and other relevant promotional materials. Washington says that he shares Lambright’s philosophy of operating in as upfront and professional a manner as possible. “Whenever he (Lambright) does his pitch, he wants the clients to understand, he’s there to help them make money,” said Washington. “As a business owner, he understands what it takes to make that money. He wants to make sure that clients get a bang for their buck – not in the sense of being cheap, March 2012

From Lambright’s point of view, staying on top of those expectations is the key to keeping clients happy, and – most importantly of all – building the referrals and repeat business that a company needs to sustain itself over the long haul. “I just try to get a feel for what people like – I just try to cater to the client’s needs. I just want to continuously grow and expand in the area. We want to have a lot of people working with us,” he said. For additional information, visit http://www.facebook. com/Lambright-Premiere-Entertainment, or email: info@lambrightevents,com. For booking, reservations and other information, call (317) 642-3690 from 8 a.m. to 9 p.m. (seven days a week).

Scan the Tag to Visit Lambright Premiere Entertainment’s Facebook Page

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

Get the free mobile app at

http:/ / gettag.mobi

pg 25


BARS in the REGION Elkhart

523 Tap & Grill Barney’s B J Stars Between the Buns Big Easy Bowly's Crystal Bar Inc Cappy’s Chicago Grill and Bar Chubby Trout Crimaldi's Dino's Firehouse Lounge Half-time Sports Bar Harrison Landing Heinnies Hunters Place Lakeshore Grill The Bee’s 3 My Dad’s Place PC's Bar and Grill Pete’s Simeri's Beardsley St Tavern Stirred The Vine Whiskey Dicks

519 S Main St 2700 Hammond Ave 405 Baldwin St 2041 Cassopolis St 160 Easy Shopping Pl 109 Freight St 1000 N. Michigan 2425 Cassopolis St 2730 Cassopolis St 117 W Jackson Blvd 1500 Osolo Rd 4000 E Bristol St # 8 26084 CR-6 600 S Main St # 102 1743 W Lusher Ave 2703 S Main 51330 State Road 19 1125 W Beardsley Ave 51425 S.R. 19 1915 Borneman Ave 51426 S.R.19 1737 W Beardsley Ave 115 E Lexington Ave 214 S Main St 561 E. Jackson Blvd

(574) 523-1523

Granger Between the Buns Eddie’s Steak Shed Tilted Kilt The Pitt Stop Yesterday’s

12797 State Rd 23 12685 Adams Rd 1032 E. University Dr 13020 State Road 23 12594 State Road 23

(574) 243-8889 (574) 277-1076 (574) 272-KILT (574) 272-7488 (574) 272-7017

(574) 264-9327 (574) 206-9900 (574) 293-4890 (574) 294-2440 (574) 262-3511 (574) 264-0183 (574) 264-5700 (574) 522-9125 (574) 264-1300 (574) 264-3412 (574) 264-3320 (574) 295-8882 (574) 522-9101 (574) 293-2117 (574) 266-0606 (574) 293-4056 (574) 262-2237 (574) 293-1915 (574) 264-9033 (574) 293-3941 (574) 522-4914 (574) 970-5006 (574) 294-7500

La Porte 3rd Base Bar and Grill Avenue Bar Bruceski's Casey's Lanes Dick's Bar Friends Nightclub Hilltop Bar I Street Bar Lady Rose Bar & Grill Los Coyotes Mickey's Pinola Saloon Ringers Rother's Pub Shooters Smutzer's Club Tavern The Warehouse Thunderbird Lanes Town Tavern Waterford Inn Western Inn

1201 Pine Lake Rd 617 Michigan Ave 332 Park St 610 Colfax Ave 912 Lincolnway 605 Washington St. 502 Pulaski St 1508 "I" Street 403 E. Lincolnway 517 Tipton St 501 Tipton St 702 S. 500 W. 311 Washington St 444 Pine Lake Ave 201 Washington St. 608 Monroe St 303 Brighton 1251 Pine Lake 1001 E Lincolnway 6466 W Johnson Rd 610 J St.

(219) 324-0300 (219) 324-2645 (219) 362-6927 (219) 362-1571 (219) 326-9702 (219) 362-7000 (219) 362-6308 (219) 362-4290 (219) 326-8048 (219) 362-4969 (219) 362-1826 (219) 324-4300 (219) 326-6412 (219) 362-4585 (219) 362-2471 (219) 362-7421 (219) 324-6325 (219) 362-3555 (219) 326-9723 (219) 879-9083 (219) 325-3094

Hanna/Wanatah Hanna Hub Rumors Back 40 Silver Horseshoe

2 Moore Street 12 Moore Street 109 South Main Street 102 N. Main st.

(219) 797-5675 (219) 797-2337 (219) 733-2624 (219) 733-9107

Michigan City Bartletts Barker Inn Benny's Blue Chip Casino Hotel & Spa

pg 26

131 e. Dunes Hwy 607 E Barker Ave 3101 E Us Highway 12 777 Blue Chip Drive

(219) 879-3081 (219) 879-9011 (219) 874-3663 (888) 879-7711

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

Center St. Bar Charley's Bar & Grill Clubhouse Driving Range Decoys Bar & Grill El Nopal Galveston's Steakhouse Gratty’s 12 on the Lake Hammers Holly's It's Vegas Baby! Joe's Bar & Grill Lakeshore Lanes Matey's Mc Ginnis Pub Mug Shots Lounge Nowhere Bar and Grill Pines Lounge Pumps on 12 Reilly's Rocks Lounge Rodini's Ryan's Irish Pub Sahara Sand Trap Shoreline Brewery Stadium Inn Kunckleheads Sportsman's Inn The Game Sportbar Three Sheets Bar & Grill

501 Ctr St 517 Barker Avenue 415 E US 20 1729 E US 20 110 West 9th st. 10 commerce Sq 1716 Franklin Street 12 On the Lake Drive 2134 E. Hwy 20 3705 Franklin St. 777 Blue Chip Drive 2958 W Dunes Hwy 2820 E. Michigan Blvd 110 Franklin St. 227 W 7th St 1901 S Woodland Ave 5868 E. Tioga Trail 3860 W Dunes Hwy 3085 E. Hwy 12 1103 Franklin 777 Blue Chip Drive 4125 Franklin St. 401 Franklin St 1701 Franklin Street 3015 E Michigan Blvd 208 Wabash St 2323 Wabash St 204 W Barker Ave 3201 E. Hwy 12 777 Blue Chip Drive 227 W Barker Ave

(219) 879-5254 (219) 861-2582 (219) 878-9556 (219) 878-0222 (219) 879-5555 (219) 814-4041 (219) 809-4000 (219) 879-0760 (219) 879-5124 (888) 879-7711 (219) 879-9336 (219) 879-9445 (219) 872-9471 (219) 872-8200 (219) 872-1223 (219) 778-2074 (219) 874-7330 (219) 874-6201 (219) 871-7000 (888) 879-7714 (219) 879-7388 (219) 872-0361 (219) 871-1223 (219) 879-9606 (219) 879-4677 (219) 879-9781 (219) 221-6763 (219) 879-9941 (888) 879-7711 (219) 878-9872

Mishawaka Bar Louie Bleachers Blue Lantern Center St. Pub Jerrys Pub Maury's Pat's Pub Midway Tavern Office Lounge Parkway Lanes Phoenix Bar & Grill Pit Stop Pone Express Press Box Riverside Tavern Roc's Sports Café Roxie's Manhattan Sky Michiana Smith’s Downtown That Place Bar & Grill The Pub

6501 Grape Rd 4609 Grape Rd 928 E. McKinley 112 N. Center St. 1211 W 6th St 901 W 4th St 810 W 4th St 1813 E 12th. St. 1504 Chestnut Street 101 Lincoln Way W 1753 E. 12th St. 1617 Milburn Blvd 1653 E 4th St 100 N. Center St. 212 W Edison Rd 424 W 7th St 100 N. Center St. 110 Lincolnway E 300 W. 6th St. 408 Cleveland St

(574) 277-9100 (574) 277-9332 (574) 255-2005 (574) 968-0244 (574) 257-1466 (574) 259-8282 (574) 255-0458 (574-259-3898 (574) 255-5424 (574) 257-8876 (574) 254-0389 (574) 254-1925 (574) 252-5753 (574) 259-1598 (574) 252-5780 (574) 259-9600 (574) 257-0759 (574) 255-2227 (574) 387-4499 (574) 273-5397

Three Thirty One Inn Trips traxside tavern Trumans Wings Etc. Wooden Shoe Yakety Yak Cafe

1123 Union St 318 So union st 100 N. Center St. 6502 Grape Rd 822 W 6th St 701 W 4th St

(574) 255-2790 (574) 259-7233 (574) 259-2282 (574) 273-0088 (574) 258-9201 (574) 255-8601

16409 Red Arrow Hwy

(269) 231-5205

600 W Water St 136 N. Whittaker St 310 E Buffalo St

(269) 469-1699 (269) 469-5800 (269) 469-9600

Union Pier, MI Mickey’s New Buffalo, MI Bentwood Tavern Casey's Bar and Grill El Ranchero Grande

March 2012


BARS in the REGION Jimmy's Bar & Grill O'Briens Roma Pizza Da Pub

18529 La Porte Rd 12578 Wilson Rd 17600 Red Arrow Hwy 19332 State Route 239

(269) 469-2100 (269) 469-3400 (269) 469-3698 (269) 469-4448

Niles, MI Corral Jays Lounge Pete's Patio Riverfront Café Wings Etc.

701 N 13th St 3025 s. 11th St. 2433 N 5th St 219 Front St 2008 S. 11th St

(269) 684-1185 (269) 684-8353 (269) 683-4565 (269) 684-2233 (269) 683-9464

Osceola Between the Buns Tapped Out Trevi's

1720 Lincolnway W 55581 Ash Rd 512 Lincolnway W

(574) 679-4474 (574) 674-6442 (574) 674-6261

South Bend Agave 53 Tequila Bar AJ's Anchor Inn Antonio's Bar Backstage Grill/Green Room Blarney Stone Between the Buns Bob's 19th Hole Bob's Pub Bootleg’ers Buffalo Wild Wings Centerfolds Chain O Lakes Cheers Pub Chuck's Tavern City Limits Lounge CJ’s Pub Clay Pub Club Fever Club Landing Corby's Irish Pub Dave's Pub & Co Donna Lee's Dew Drop Inn Franks Place Gippers Lounge Green Star Cafe Hoosier Tap & Grill Hoosier Wings & More Jeannie’s Joe's Tavern Jovi's Restaurant & Lounge Kate O'Connors Kelly's Pub O’Rourkes Public House Lonnies 23 Inn Linebacker Lounge Madison Oyster Bar Main St. Pub McCormicks Mitch’s Corner Moondogs Morris Performing Arts Center Mulligans Murpheys Backyard Pub My Place Oaken Bucket O'Sullivans Crossing Oscars Billiard Club Peddler's Pub

119 N Michigan St 4505 Ameritech Drive, 2224 W. Wester Ave 2227 Franklin St 222 S. Michigan 113 E Wayne St 1803 South Bend Ave 26582 US Highway 20 1406 Portage Ave 1302 Ford St. 123 W Washington St 1505 Kendall St. 26230 Southport rd 103 S. Dixieway North 1201 W Sample St 1807 S Ironwood Dr 236 S Michigan St 52170 Rt 933 222 S. Michigan 1717 Lincolnway East 441 E Lasalle Ave 3013 Mishawaka Ave 701 W Indiana Ave 822 S. Lafayette 327 Marion 515 N Dixie Way 1605 Miami St 718 W Indiana Ave 1835 Lincoln Way E 621 S Bendix Dr 1201 Dunham St 1905 Miami St 415 E. Michigan St. 1150 Mishawaka Ave 1044 Angela Blvd 1989 Prairie Ave 1631 South Bend Avenue 129 N Main St 2046 South Bend Ave 125 N. Michigan Ave 1516 N. Ironwood Dr. 4407 S Ironwood Dr 211 North Michigan Street 1705 S Bend Ave 3601 Mishawaka Ave 1509 Portage Ave 1212 S Ironwood Dr 235 S. Michigan 1902 S. Bend Ave 904 E Ireland Rd

(574) 232-9464 (574) 272-1800 (574) 237-9147 (574) 233-6114 (574) 232-0222 (574) 283-0452 (574) 247-9293 (574) 289-2318 (574) 233-0635 (574) 234-0744 (574) 232-2293 (574) 288-7827 (574) 232-9063 (574) 387-4642 (574) 289-9457 (574) 288-3636 (574) 233-5981 (574) 277-6982 (574) 232-5200 (574) 289-4122 (574) 233-5326 (574) 237-9195 (574) 237-9811 (574) 289-9829 (574) 232-2277 (574) 323-1015 (574) 287-9606 (574) 289-4318 (574) 232-0457 (574) 288-2962 (574) 237-9182 (574) 289-3770 (574) 654-8114 (574) 287-7379 (574) 251-0355 (574) 251-0282 (574) 289-0186 (574) 288-4299 (574) 271-9898 (574) 289-8031 (574) 855-2365 (574) 291-6544 (574) 235-9190 (574) 277-5666 (574) 233-5968 (574) 234-2280 (574) 289-1616 (574) 289-3333 (574) 277-6651 (574) 291-9192

March 2012

Pejza's Lydick Tavern

26444 Edison Rd

(574) 233-9542

Rum Village Inn

2209 Kemble Ave

(574) 288-1773

Tapped Out II Sean Ocasey's South Bank The View Vickie's Wings Etc. Wise Guys West Winds

2206 Mishawaka Ave 123 N. St. Joseph St. 1763 Lincoln Way E 515 E Jefferson Blvd 112 W Monroe St 2051 E. Ireland Rd. 3421 W Sample St 56629 Mayflower Rd

(574) 289-4888 (574) 245-7280 (574) 232-1980 (574) 288-8439 (574) 232-4090 (574) 291-0077 (574) 234-2670 (574) 233-5168

Middlebury Rulli’s Bella Luna

851 U.S. 20

(574) 825-7222

Westville Blackhawk Inn The Ville Ramsay’s Westpoint Crossroads

257 W. Main St. 351 W. Main St. 11042 W. US Highway 4817 U.S. 421

(219) 785-2296

Edwardsburg, MI Fireside Tap & Grill

69245 Maple St.

(269) 414-4103

225 N Michigan St 15147 Lincoln Hwy 116 East Laporte Street 1111 W Jefferson St 114 N. Michigan St

(574) 936-7004 (574) 540-2333 (574) 935-5514 (574) 935-9939 (574) 914-4123

109 S. Main St.

(219) 733-2624

Plymouth Brass Rail Club Omega Dandelion Bar Mayflower Opie’s Office Wanatah The Other Place

(219) 785-2621 (219) 785-4030

Tot Shots By: Paige Turner

I know that Wizard of Oz reunion is around here somewhere...”

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

pg 27


Club Fever - South bend

The Real Cure for a Hangover Via: Asylum.com

Caffeine and painkillers are the best way to combat the unpleasant effects of a hangover. Researchers at Thomas Jefferson University in Philadelphia have discovered that the chemical acetate, which is produced when the body is exposed to ethanol, is responsible for the headache associated with a hangover. In testing involving lab rats, the researchers then found that the old standbys of caffeine and ibuprofen will best neutralize the painful, next-day effects of acetate.

Monogomy Linked to Drunkenness Via: Asylum.com

Monogamous societies drink a lot more than polygamous societies do. University of Leuven economists Mara Squicciarini and Jo Swinnen have just published a working paper which makes the observation that modern polygamous societies -- chiefly parts of the Muslim world and Mormon fundamentalists -- are strictly dry. The economists also went back into history and found that when societies shift from being polygamous to monogamous they tend to consume more alcohol. In fact, they found that “drunkenness,� in particular, is correlated with monogamy. Obvious conclusion being that one has to get pretty sloshed to bear coming home to the same person every night. pg 28

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

March 2012


Puzzles 13. A long narrow passage

21. Arrangement holder 25. Fodder holder 26. Weapons 27. A source of seepage 28. Earnings 29. Manage 30. Willow twig 31. Bridle strap 34. Sixty-six in Ro-

How to play: The numbers 1 through 9 will appear once only in each row, column, and 3x3 zone. There are 9 such zones in each sudoku grid. There is only one correct solution to each sudoku. Good luck!

accumulate behind bicker captive carriage climb coarse conductor contend covert crease

March 2012

crumple driver enter ewer plaid purr rated remnant rent scatter scorn

spread sprint stamp state stench thirst track trot uproar whimper

man numerals

Across 1. Sail supports 6. Offensively malodorous 10. Ancient Peruvian 14. Apportion 15. Sea eagle 16. French Sudan, today 17. The excrement of sea birds 18. Earl Grey and orange pekoe 19. American ones are apple 20. Impermeable 22. Elliptical 23. Angry 24. Ancient ascetic 26. Inevitably 30. German iris 32. Absorb written material 33. Otherwise 35. Slander 39. Lava 41. Twelve in Roman numerals 42. Overweight 43. Coil of yarn 44. Sell 46. Not fat 47. Low point 49. Womb

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51. Clan 54. Hearing organ 55. Matures 56. The publication of a club or group

63. Slant 64. “Oh, my!” 65. Nigerian monetary unit 66. Sheltered, nautically 67. Put together 68. Toothpaste brand 69. Lascivious look 70. 1 1 1 1 71. Emcees

36. Ale or lager 37. Jacob’s brother 38. Focusing glass 40. A Freudian stage 45. Twofold

48. Generator 50. Ditch 51. Deadly 52. Nimble 53. Donnybrook 54. S S S S 57. Distinctive flair 58. Walk through water 59. Tropical root 60. Neckwear 61. At one time (archaic) 62. Rodents

DOWN 1. Wise men 2. Astringent 3. Smack 4. Sound 5. Blusterous 6. Malodorous 7. Chocolate cookie 8. A Central American sloth 9. Not greater 10. Undoable 11. Unsophisticated 12. Not dirty pg 29


Mitch’s corner - south bend

69245 MAPLE ST. EDWARDSBURG, MI 269-414-4103

WWW.FIRESIDETAPANDGRILL.COM

MON TUES

$.75 TACOS BBQ RIB SPECIAL, CAPT MORGAN & PEPSI $2.50 WED $2 DOM BOTTLE & $2 1/2LB BURGERS THURS AYCE FROG LEGS $9.99 & BACARDI & PEPSI $2.50 FRI AYCE FISH FRY SAT $.39 WINGS UNTIL 5P & PRIME RIB SPECIALS 5-10P

ST. PATRICKS DAY PARTY MARCH 17TH

Get the free mobile app at

http:/ / gettag.mobi

pg 30

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

March 2012


Can You Give Me a Push? A man is in bed with his wife when there is a rat-a-tattat on the door. He rolls over and looks at his clock, and it’s half past three in the morning. “I’m not getting out of bed at this time,” he thinks, and rolls over. Then, a louder knock follows. “Aren’t you going to answer that?” says his wife. So he drags himself out of bed, and goes downstairs. He opens the door and there is man standing at the door. It didn’t take the homeowner long to realize the man was drunk. “Hi there.” slurs the stranger, “Can you give me a push??” “No, get lost, it’s half past three. I was in bed.” says the man and slams the door. He goes back up to bed and tells his wife what happened and she says “Dave, that wasn’t very nice of you. Remember that night we broke down in the pouring rain on the way to pick the kids up from the baby-sitter and you had to knock on that man’s house to get us started again? What would have happened if he’d told us to get lost??” “But the guy was drunk.” says the husband. “It doesn’t matter.” says the wife. “He needs our help and it would be the right thing to do.” So the husband out of bed again, gets dressed, and goes downstairs. He opens the door, and not being able to see the stranger anywhere he shouts: “Hey, do you still want a push??” and he hears a voice cry out “Yeah please.” So, still being unable to see the stranger he shouts: “Where are you?” And the stranger replies: “I’m over here, on your swingset.”

March 2012

www.MichianaEntertainer.com

Kelly’s - South bend

pg 31


STREETWALKER: Jacqueline

STREETSMARTS

TASTES LIKE: the red juice dripping out the back of your burrito.

Created by: Sam Mechling

PERSONAL QUOTE: “Butterfly kisses on your d*ck tips!”

Georgette, a yoga instructor from Elkhart, asks: Since he was born, I’ve been breastfeeding my five year old son, Paul. How can I ween him off of this embarrassing habit?

Molly, unemployed from La Porte asks: I’ve been seeing a married man for three years, but he just won’t leave his wife. Should I kick this guy to the curb?

My boyfriend has some disgusting pet rodent that he won’t get rid of. Should I give him an ultimatum?

pg 32

SMELLS LIKE: a diaper bag filled with Speedstick

Spring Cleaning Your Life

NICKNAME: “Jack Angelo”

Joelle, a concert promoter from South Bend, asks:

WINO: Willie Rodes

STREETWALKER:

WINO:

“Shit! At least your titties work! Mine are all for show. Like a racing spoiler on an ‘87 Chevy Cavalier

“Your son is sucking’ them tittes? That shit is WEIRD! Now why don’t you let old Willie take a crack at that rack!”

STREETWALKER:

WINO:

“Hell NO! Married men are the best! I got an old picture of me and that fool who owns California Rayz Tanning Salon that is so nasty… let me put it this way: I haven’t paid for tanning in 10 years.”

“B*tch. It ain’t matrimony. That sh*t is macaroni.”

STREETWALKER:

WINO:

“You gotta train that thing! I got a ferret that I taught to sniff out crack rocks that I dropped on my carpet. That little f**ker done saved my life!”

“Be careful with that sh*t. You don’t know betrayal until your pet raccoon runs off with your Corn Nuts while you’re Listerine-drunk. Why Felicity?! WHY?!”

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bronze statue of a young boy urinating, is a popular tourist attraction in Brussels but it recently had to be turned off due to sub-zero temperatures. Everything should be running properly once the weather warms up but in the meantime, no amount of pleading, begging or rubbing will cause the little guy’s juices to flow.

from Around The World

The Squirrel Formerly Known as Brown Jersey Shore, New Jersey

Via: Paige Turner & the Entertainer Newsroom

A Match Made in Prison High-security psychiatric ward, Sweden A cannibal and a self-professed vampire have recently committed to spending eternity with one another, despite the fact that they may never live again outside of prison walls. The couple met while each is incarcerated for murder and now believes they have found true love. Prison officials will allow the marriage but not consummation of the event, as recent viewings of Twilight have taught them that nothing good happens when horny vampires are concerned.

A man and his wife recently caged a squirrel that caught their eye, as the animal was sporting a bright purple coat of fur that didn’t look dyed or altered in any way. In a new version of GTL, the squirrel somehow Got Too Lavender and was released back into the wild before it could be studied further. The pictures show a healthy looking animal but the man and his wife who found it decided it was safer to let it go, as they had redneck neighbors who were suddenly interested in trying to “taste the rainbow”.

Why Did the Chicken Lay the Jumbo Egg? San Francisco, Columbia

Bald Man Shines in Rogaine Line-Up Sayville, NY A man was recently caught on tape stealing nearly $150 worth of Rogaine from a local CVS. His completely bald head caused a glare which caught the attention of the surveillance cameras, but not before he slipped out of the store with his stolen goods. Male pattern baldness is an embarrassing, long term problem for many but with his photos now plastered all over Long Island, this criminal might be better off investing in a wig.

A farmer’s daughter recently discovered that a hen named Franciscana laid an egg weighing 8/6 ounces, which is about four times the normal weight for an egg. Done without the help of growth hormone or genetic modification, the hen was found hiding from its behemoth offspring. The farmer has decided to preserve the egg in a glass case to show off to the community and despite his initial shell-shocked reaction, he is now proud of his hen that laid the good-sized egg.

That’ll Do, Rabbit Sweden A species-confused rabbit on a small farm in Sweden has become a YouTube sensation, much to the confusion of the farmer whose land it lives on. Apparently the bunny taught itself how to round up sheep after watching the sheepdogs perform the task more than a few times. All of the attention has convinced him the rabbit is lucky enough to stay on as his hopping help, though he’s had to keep an eye on the sheepdogs should they decide to make mincemeat out of their competition. The bunny has been named Babe and never has to worry about his foot becoming a keychain ever again.

FBI Reenacts Texas Chainsaw Massacre for Free Fitchburg, MA In a scene straight from a low-budget horror flick, FBI agents recently busted into the wrong apartment and terrorized the inhabitants in a case of mistaken identity. This was made worse because the agents used a chain saw blade to cut through the front door before realizing their error. Officials have issued apologies but the wronged residents won’t be happy until they can use a chainsaw to scare the crap out of the cops in return, preferably while imitating a scene from Scarface. At press time, no officers have stepped up to honor this request.

One Way to Avoid the Yellow Snow Brussels, Sweden It’s well-known that men are often a little “gun-shy” in extremely cold temperatures and apparently statues are no different. The Manneken-Pis, a

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Madison oyster bar - south bend

Your Mom Three guys are drinking in a bar when a drunk Irishman comes in, staggers up to them, and points to the guy in the middle, shouting, “Your Mum’s the best lay in town!” Everyone expects a fight but the guy ignores him and the drunk wanders up to the end of the bar. Ten minutes later, the drunk comes back, points to the same guy, and says, “I just screwed your mum and it was really sw-e-et!” Again the guy refuses to take the bait, and the drunk wanders off. Ten minutes later, he comes back and announces, “Your mum even let me....” Finally the guy interrupts, “Go home, Dad---you’re drunk again!”

Happy Bride Attending a wedding for the first time, a little girl whispered to her mother, “Why is the bride dressed in white?” “Because white is the color of happiness and today is the happiest day of her life,” her mother tried to explain, keeping it simple. The child thought about this for a moment, then said, “So, why’s the groom wearing black?”

March 2012

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It’s Vegas Baby! - blue Chip Casino

Redneck Fights

There were some backwoods hillbillies living across the river from each other, who feuded constantly. John hated Clarence with a passion and never passed up a chance to throw rocks across the river at Clarence. This went on for years until one day the Corps of Engineers came to build a bridge across that river. John was elated; he told his wife that finally he was going to get the chance to cross over and whip Clarence. He left the house and returned in a matter of minutes. His wife asked what was wrong, didn’t he intend to go over the bridge and whip Clarence? He replied that he never had really seen Clarence up close and didn’t realize his size until he started over the bridge and saw the sign: “CLEARANCE 8 FT 3 IN”

Delaying Sex Improves Long Term Relationships Via: Asylum.com

Not having sex for at least the first month of a relationship seems to make it stronger in the long run. Researchers from Brigham Young University's School of Family Life interviewed 2,035 men and women who were an average age of 36 and in their first marriage. The researchers established the point when the men and women first had sex with their current partner, and then asked them questions about the strength of their relationship. The longer a person held off on having sex before marriage, the more satisfying they reported their relationship to be. Those who waited to have sex until after marriage also reported higher levels of marital satisfaction and stability relative to those who had had sex within the first month of dating. File this under studies one should not discuss during a first date. March 2012

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Drunk Idiots

Drink & Run

A construction worker walks into a bar. He’s a rather large, menacing guy. He orders a beer, chugs it back, and bellows, “All you guys on this side of the bar are a bunch of idiots!” A sudden silence descends. After a moment he asks “Anyone got a problem with that?” The silence lengthens. He then chugs back another beer and growls, “And all you guys on the other side of the bar are all scum!” Once again, the bar is silent. He looks around belligerently and roars, “Anyone got a problem with that?” A lone man gets up from his stool unsteadily and starts to walk towards the man. “You got a problem, buddy?” The man replies, “Oh no; I’m just on the wrong side of the bar.”

March 2012

A man goes into a bar and seats himself on a stool. The bartender looks at him and says, “What’ll it be buddy?” The man says, “Set me up with seven whiskey shots and make them doubles.” The bartender does this and watches the man slug one down, then the next, then the next, and so on until all seven are gone almost as quickly as they were served. Staring in disbelief, the bartender asks why he’s doing all this drinking. “You’d drink them this fast too if you had what I have.” The bartender hastily asks, “What do you have pal?” The man quickly replies, “I have a dollar.”

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Woman’s Point of View with

Paige Turner

Spring Flinging O

h, March. A month of basketball games, Spring Breaks and St. Patrick’s Day is not surprisingly also a month of copious amounts of socially accepted drinking, which can lead to copious amounts of socially accepted hooking up. There are festivities, parades and parties galore and all of these events can lead to potential all-nighters, especially given the amount of boozing that’s often involved. And who doesn’t love a good, no strings attached connection? Most men and women will have a night like this at some point in their lives and there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. So store your bulky winter coat, remind yourself there’s a naked human body under all those layers and fling your heart out as spring rolls in! If you’re into the whole sports scene, bars can be a great place to find your potential night mate. Don’t pull the whole damsel in distress act though, because nothing’s more desperate than a faker (it wouldn’t hurt to keep this in mind while in the bedroom too). If you don’t know the difference between a foul shot and an air ball, feel free to ask but be prepared to be ignored. Any true fan will tell you that in high stakes games like championships,

It’s easy to let yourself run wild when you know you’ll never see any of the people from that Foam Party ever again! you’ll really only catch someone’s eye if you know what you’re talking about. Or if you’re bringing more beer while wearing a low-cut, skin tight tank top. St. Patty’s Day is also a good one for making connections at your local watering hole, so long as you’re not so drunk that your skin is as green as your beer - no

one wants the luck of the Irish spewed down the front of their shirt. Spring Break provides ample hooking-up hot spots and opportunities, especially if you’re on vacation. It’s also a time to let your skin see the sun after the long winter hibernation so be sure to remember to pack your weed wacker for those hairy legs. Being a stranger in a new town gives lots of opportunities for shenanigans and it’s best to take advantage of them while you can. Besides the fact that you don’t have to bother remembering pesky things like phone numbers and first names, there are so many people doing the walk of shame in the morning that you’ll blend right in. It’s easy to let yourself run wild when you know you’ll never see any of the people from that Foam Party ever again! No matter what, embrace what (or who) you’re doing. Flings aren’t for everyone but those that have them tend to have a lot of fun. After all, if their way of breaking free from cabin fever involves being locked in said cabin with young, nude bodies glistening in oil…well, that’s as good a way as any to jump into spring. As long as everyone is safe and at least mostly honest you should feel free to play your night away but if you wind up with a dud of an evening – well, you don’t have to have to share breakfast in the morning before ducking out. And if you’re scared you’ll fall into a fling before you’re ready, growing that leg hair out long enough for braids should help you keep it in your pants. Paige Turner works in an office by day and writes columns and articles by night. She has two degrees, a sports trophy and a nine inch scar on her leg. If you’d like to get Paige’s Point of View on a particular subject, email her at: PTurner@MichianaEntertainer.Com


Jar of Olives

McCarthy walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, he started to leave. “Excuse me,” said a customer, who was puzzled over what McCarthy had done. “What was that all about?” “Nothing,” he replied, “my wife just sent me out for a jar of olives.”

Irish Dental Plan

An Irishman goes to his dentist with problems with his teeth. Patient: Doctor, I have yellow teeth, what do I do? Dentist: Wear a brown tie!

March 2012

No Luck With the Ladies

A man walked into a therapist’s office looking very depressed, “Doc, you’ve got to help me. I can’t go on like this.” “What’s the problem?” the doctor inquired. “Well, I’m 35 years old and I still have no luck with the ladies. No matter how hard I try, I just seem to scare them away.” “My friend, this is not a serious problem. You just need to work on your self-esteem. Each morning, I want you to get up and run to the bathroom mirror. Tell yourself that you are a good person, a fun person, and an attractive person. But say it with real conviction. Within a week you’ll have women buzzing all around you.” The man seemed content with this advice and walked out of the office a bit excited. Three weeks later he returned with the same downtrodden expression on his face. “Did my advice not work?” asked the doctor. “It worked alright. For the past several weeks I’ve enjoyed some of the best moments in my life with the most fabulous looking women.” “So, what’s your problem?”“I don’t have a problem,” the man replied. “My wife does.”

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center Street - Mishawaka

Tuesday Trivia Night Special $6.95 All You Can Eat Spaghetti Dinner with Salad and Garlic Bread

$3 U-Call-Its Appetizers, Burgers, and Wings Over $60 in Prizes Every Tuesday

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March 2012


Corned Beef and Cabbage

Michiana Eats

By: Brian Martin

American Style By: Brian Martin

he American version of Ireland’s St. Patrick’s Day meal, in the US and elsewhere, is T Corned Beef and Cabbage. My research found that Corned Beef first appeared in the 12th century poem Visions of MacConglinne which describes Irish food eaten at that

time. It tells the cut of meat used for Corned Beef was a delicacy in Ireland which was served to Kings and nobility to conjure “the demon of gluttony out of their bellies,” and not for Irish farming peasants What is Corned Beef anyway? Corning was developed in the Anglo-Saxon times to cure meat so it would last throughout the summer months. Corn sized salt pellets would be rubbed into the meat to keep it from spoiling. In the late 19th century it became popular when the Irish emigrated to the U.S. and Canada. The meat was treated the same way as a “bacon joint” would have been, at home in Ireland. It was soaked to draw off the excess salt, then braised or broiled with cabbage served in its own juice with minimal seasoning. Another little known truth is that for most Irish people, Corned Beef is considered too poor to eat on holidays. They’d make something more festive. Like salt bacon and potatoes

Guiness Stout Glaze 3-5lb Corned Beef w/ seasoning packet 6-8 potatoes skin on 6-8 large onions 6-8 celery root balls

Guiness Stout Glaze 3c Guiness Stout 1 lg onion minced 1/2 c soy sauce ½ c brown sugar ¼ c sesame oil 3T garlic minced 1c honey 2T parsley minced 1 ½ t black pepper

and root vegetables. Today’s traditional St. Patrick’s Day feast of Corned Beef and Cabbage (with the little packet of pickling spices) takes several hours of slow cooking in order to prepare it correctly, My recipe keeps with tradition, while adding a few small twists. Incorporating an Irish staple, I use Guiness Stout to make a glaze which is ladled over the meat when finished. And, since Ireland is known for its love of root vegetables, I’ve added celery root and turnips with the potatoes and carrots. I think you’ll find this recipe original with the present food mood we find today. Please enjoy!

Bring chicken broth to a rapid boil; add potatoes returning to rapid boil for 10 minutes, potatoes will be done when poked with a toothpick and has no resistance, drain cooling slightly. Cut into quarter’s long ways. In a bowl, add potatoes and dressing tossing carefully until well mixed. Add Blu Cheese and slightly mix again.

6-8 turnips 1 Bunch baby carrots 1 head cabbage

Place the corned beef w/ seasoning packet in covered stock pan. Cover with cold water. Bring to boil, once boiling, reduce heat and simmer for 50 minutes a pound.

When meat is finished, add potatoes, celery roots, turnips, onions cut into large pieces. Add the carrots on top. Cook approx. another 18-20 minutes or until vegetables are tender. Now quarter the cabbage and add it to pot. Cook another 15 minutes more, remove from heat. While meat is still warm, ladle warmed Guiness Stout glaze over meat. Let cool slightly. Slice meat across grain.

This month’s food lesson: : After cooking manicotti tubes, run under cold water to stop the cooking process making stuffing them easier. All Recipes are designed for 2-4 servings. Not a foodie? Need help with a recipe? Have a cooking related question? Email me at grillmasterbrian@ymail.com & Check out my food pictures at facebook.com/grillmasterbrian.

March2011 2012 March

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Your St. Patrick’s Day Bank Statement:

office lounge - mishawaka

Tranlsated. By: Cara Holland, Via: Collegehumor.com

March 2012

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Featured Bartenders

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Casey

Tasha

at

at

Bleachers

Madison Oyster Bar

south bend

mishawaka

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Bartender of the

Month Brought to you by:

Jen at frank’s Place

Vote For Your Favorite Local Bartender Now!

888-512-0881 or visit MichianaEntertainer.Com

Each Month’s Winner will recieve a feature in the next month’s issue of the Michiana Entertainer and a chance to compete in the 5th Annual Bartender of the Year Contest in December March 2012

Must be 21+ to win. No purchase necessary. Forwww.MichianaEntertainer.com official rules go to www.michianaentertainer.com. Not applicable to Michigan locations. pg 47


Technology Deprivation Resembles Drug Withdrawal

Frank’s Place - South Bend

Via: Asylum.Com

Being forced to stay away from computers, cell phones, iPods, television, radio and newspapers causes young people to suffer similar symptoms to drug addicts and smokers who go cold turkey. Researchers from the University of Maryland had studentsfrom 12 colleges around the world not use any of the aforementioned technologies for 24 hours, although they were allowed to use land-line phones and read books. The students kept diaries of how they were feeling during their period of information deprivation. The students reported in their diaries physiological and physical symptoms comparable to addicts trying to quit smoking or drugs. These symptoms included feeling fidgety, anxious and isolated, and even reaching out for their cell phone, which was no longer there. While we’d really love to mock the students who participated in this study, we’re not sure how well we’d hold up in the face of such an information blackout, and find the prospect of trying to figure that out somewhat horrifying.

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Get the free mobile app at

http:/ / gettag.mobi

March 2012

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Get the f

http:/ /

Get the free mobile app at

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Cocktail: Donkey Punch Mixologist: Brandi Bar: Cheers Pub Ingredients: Vodka, Gin Tripsec, Tequila, Redbull Comment: After you drink this a donkey punch doesn’t sound so bad

Cocktail: Fired up Mixologist: Kristi Bar: Fireside Tap and Grill Ingredients: Various liquors with a splash of Grenadine Comment: This is what you need when your fired up. MELLLOW

free mobile app at

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Cocktail: Pink Poss’e Mixologist: Jen Bar:: Franks Place Ingredients: Captain, Malibu, Bacardi, pineapple juice, grenadine Comments: Easy does it

March 2012

Cocktail: Hardcore bull Mixologist: Rena Bar: Club Fever Ingredients: Various Flavors of Vodka, Bacardi Limon, just a splash of redbull Comment: No wings here since you will be on the floor after a few

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smith’s downtown - Mishawaka

Take It Off A woman calls her drunk husband into the bedroom. “Now Simon, I want you to take off my blouse!” “Good..” “Now I also want you to take off my Bra.” “Good...” “Now can you take off my panties.” “Very Good! Now, don’t let me catch you wearing my clothes again!”

Club & Bar DJ Services Business Promotions Live Entertainment Personalized Event Planning Parties ing r Weddings u t Fea Karaoke otto

South Bend 4611 Grape Road Mishawaka, IN 46545 (574) 271-2333 Hours of Operation: Monday-Thursday 4:00pm-10:00pm Friday 4:00pm-11:00pm Saturday 3:00pm-11:00pm Sunday 11:30am-9:00pm

JM &D

www.lambrightevents.com 317.642.3690 March 2012

OUTBACK.COM

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Casey’s - Laporte

trudge for the suds - elkhart

No Luck With the Ladies

One night a couple was lying in bed. The husband was feeling frisky so he rolled over and tapped his wife on the shoulder and started rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says “I’m sorry honey, but I have a gynaecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.” Rejected, the husband turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later he rolls over and whispers in her ear “Do you have a dentist appointment, too?”

The Chicken and the Egg

The chicken and the egg are laying in bed. The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed. The egg mutters “Well I guess that answers that riddle”.

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