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SELL THYSELF

You must sell yourself, adjures Head of School, a squeers for detail, crudded in Commerce cred. Thus Coalfacers creakling criteria, balloons of missionspiel, elbow for Freddo Frogs up ladders of P.D. (Ed.). There’s no such thing as B+. Seems, madam? Nay, it is. I know not ‘seems’ . . . But I have that within which passeth show . . . Drafts must be chased, checked, churned without fail. The Bored Studs avows one single, solitary draft, Which I interpret as one draft for lingual control, one for vocab, one form, content, intent, extent, craft . . . Ah, Elysium is a snow-storm of signifiers. How absolute the knave is! We must speak by the card or equivocation will undo us. Change your image, Head emails Senior Humanities, who, stricken, juvenates as Henry Bucks dummy: hairpiece tinted russet, forelock tipped magenta - ultra kool but no Borgia for hidden agendas. Renaissance Man lies a-dyeing. You go not till I set you up a glass Where you may see the inmost part of you. Merv, trotting with clipboard, Phiz Ed dynamo - facts, fax, facts, a gloss of glyphics – Health and Hygiene Himself, exercising his ego, prodding dotheboys through showers steamy then frigid, with glazed eye and sodden Leviticus. Nowher so bisy a man as he ther nas And yet he semed bisier than he was. Behind the Head’s arras, the Chaplain, eminent greaser, Intoning Tone and Morale, Parking Perks for the Executive, Homework Ethics and Uniform Conformity that middle tackers freak at shadows, vampire wings beating up the crucifix. Thou shalt button up on pain of det. . . . if gold ruste, what shal iren do? Sell yourself, says Careers.


Michael Small April 22-May 17, 200 published LiNQ, vol.1, no.1, James Cook University, May, 2004


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