ack in 1992, in the small Sussex seaside town of Littlehampton, a tiny monthly worship event began. It was called Cutting Edge, and just 35 people showed up for the first meeting. Four years later, about 1400 young people were gathering every month, and at the end of every summer term about 10,000 would come together on the seafront to worship and proclaim the gospel, and to declare to those in the town that God and His church were not dead but very much alive. Out of that event grew the band Delirious which then spent the next 17 years until 2009 travelling around the world, helping to facilitate and bring together large gatherings of the church. The band may now have ended, but for the former keyboard player and manager of the band Tim Jupp, the vision of seeing the church come together in celebration on a grand scale lives on. ‘The BigChurchDayOut has a multi layered vision‘, says Tim. ‘For me personally, one of the things I love to see is an environment where many of the new Christians in our own local church who have no church background whatsoever, can come together and often for the first time realise that the church is a massive and exciting movement of people, which stretches so much further than any one of our smaller local congregations.' Tim says that ‘I think it’s important we understand that we're not alone when it comes to wanting to influence our nation and seeing Jesus made known.‘
Tim goes on to say how he loves the paradox at big events, which is that they are both a celebration of Unity, and also a demonstration of our diversity in the church.' Having travelled all over the world, you get to see that Gods' church comes in so many different shapes and sizes and shades and colours, and our different expressions of church all go together to make up the bigger picture of this great idea that God had for us called church. So the BigChurchDayOut is a chance to bring together some of these different expressions, and to show to a world outside that contrary to what we often read in the popular press about the church being in decline, it is very much alive and present in the UK today. '
The BigChurchDayOut has grown to 20,000 people attending in just 3 years, something quite extraordinary for the UK. One of the main things Tim says is that ' The vision for the BigChurchDayOut is that the event is as inclusive to as many as possible, both in age, churchmanship and ethnic origin. With a focus on worship, prayer and hanging out together, the BigChurchDayOut certainly has something for everyone. One its main attractions is the beautiful Wiston Estate in West Sussex which provides the backdrop to this all age celebration of the church.' There is even a venue called the Tea Tent that provides a programme that features choirs and orchestras and even one of the top UK Salvation Army brass bands. The other 2 stages at the event are the UCB stage which is aimed at more of the teenage crowd, and the main arena, which has a focus on worship and attracts many of the top names in the Christian music scene from around the world today. Tim says however that 'the BigChurchDayOut is not a music festival, but I see it more as one huge church family church meeting. For me it's not about who is the biggest or best band at the event, and that's why whatever happens during the day, we always end up at the end of the night with everyone together in the main arena in a time of corporate worship and celebration.’ Tim adds that 'we get many people coming from many of the UK's black majority churches. Some churches visit for just one of the two days, but many groups also decide to camp and stay for the whole weekend. Part of the events' vision is to keep costs down as low as possible so that people can have the opportunity to bring friends with them from outside the church, and this is made possible by the generous donations of individuals who are passionate about this vision.' So if you're wondering about a church day or weekend away, the BigChurchDayOut could be exactly what you're looking for. It will provide a brilliant time for everyone without the church leader having to panic about what they need to organise to make this happen! The BigChurchDayOut June 2nd and 3rd 2012. For more info go to www.bigchurchdayout.com
motions are the basis of the human and the cause of all human motion (action). They are the cause of love & marriage, separation and divorce, acts of benevolence and acts of violence, both care and crime are driven by them, war and peace are all behavioural responses to powerful emotions. A man’s emotions are linked to his personality which develops as a result of the hereditary and social conditioning that shapes his indirect and direct learning experiences.
According to one branch of psychology there are three basic personality types within each of us but only one of them plays the dominant role. The three personality types are first the DEPENDENT. This is the person whose sense of significance and value is linked to relationships, involvement, belonging and participation. Second is the COMPETITIVE. This person’s sense of significance and worth comes from their achievements in life. What they become, achieve or possess is the source of their self-esteem and in some bizarre way a statement of their worth to society. Finally there is the CONTROLLER whose self-estimate is linked to their level of influence, leadership and control.
If you are a dependant man and your self-concept is linked to other people’s acceptance of you, then undoubtedly your biggest fear will be the fear of rejection. Men who fear rejection will often go to great lengths to please, impress or otherwise win the affection of others. They suffer from the disease to please and will often hurt themselves in order to secure the approval of someone else. When the pain of rejection sets in, these men will often cling to the nearest available person so as not to be alone. This is why some men fall out of one relationship and instantly into another which is doomed to fail because it was only a coping mechanism in the first place. If you are primarily
a competitive male and your self-esteem is wrapped up in your achievements and possessions (symbols of your achievements), then your worst fear will be the fear of failure. Men who fear failure will often go to extreme lengths to appear successful and save face even when they are losing badly. Their basic coping mechanism in this respect involves denials, pretence, avoidance and hiding strategies in order to keep face and appear invincible. If a competitive male loses a race, he will probably pretend that he wasn’t really trying to win in the first place. If he runs for the bus and misses it, he will keep on running and
and vindictive in the way they seek to vanquish critics and silence the opposition. Whenever humans sense danger we instinctively react to protect ourselves by way of the three Fâ€™s. Fight, Flight and Freeze which constitute our basic defence mechanism. Nothing can be more difficult to deal with than a defensive male. Men get defensive when they are afraid of rejection, failure or the loss of control. Male defensiveness expresses itself in different ways depending on your personality. The dependent is more likely to FREEZE for fear of putting another foot wrong and losing even more approval or acceptance. The competitor is more prone to FLIGHT for fear of being exposed as incompetent or otherwise not good enough. The controller is more prone to FIGHT for fear of losing control or being over powered. Each of these defensive behaviours kick in instinctively when a threat arises to where most men do not even realise that they are speaking and behaving defensively. The threat itself may be real or imagined, potential or past. Once the mind senses it, the defences kick off.
pretend that he was not running for the bus at all. If you are primarily a controlling male and your self-worth is linked to your level of influence then your worst fear will be the fear of losing control. For these men, security equals control and the loss of control leads to all sorts of insecurity. Such men may eventually drive good people out of their lives and stifle good relationships by leaving no room for others to think for themselves or express their own opinions. Differences of opinion can be misconstrued by them to be a challenge to their authority and a rejection of their wise leadership. They can be quite childish
To break the cycle of defensive behaviours, you can start by practising unconditional selfacceptance. Instead of linking your sense of worth and significance to relationships, achievements or influence, you should start linking it to your own intrinsic value as a human being. If you can love yourself and celebrate yourself for simply being then you can start viewing rejection, failure or the loss of control for what they really are i.e. normal life experiences. They are nothing more than natureâ€™s feedback and valuable life lessons. Wayne Malcolm Top Motivational Teacher & Leading Life Coach www.icancoach.co.uk