24 Backpage 12/17/09
The Best and Worst of Holiday Gifts Further examination of semi-common gifts reveals their true meaning During the holiday season, there are gifts that make your heart sing, and those that make you feel worthless. Mirador explores those versatile gifts that sometimes have you wondering: Am I hated or loved?
Present Justin Timberlake’s “Play” Cologne
The Biggest Loser Diet Book
iTunes Gift Card
Holiday Sweater from Grandma
Why It Sucks This sends the subtle message that you may need to bathe more. And if you’re forced to use it, you’ll scare your friends away.
Someone thinks your packing too much junk in your trunk. Generally speaking, they don’t know you at all. A quick stop at Safeway on the way over satisfied their gift-giving needs. An iTunes gift card is the most generic gift card out there. Slap in the face. I say, slap them back. You now feel obligated to don this item whenever you see her. It’s also unfortunate when the sweater’s two sizes too big. (See diet book)
If this fad continues, males everywhere will riot in the streets, burning anything vampire-related in their path. Plus, it’s always great when you’re given a book in the middle of a series. It really doesn’t, let’s face it.
This giver isn’t even confident enough in their knowledge of your interests to pick out a suitable gift card. (See iTunes Gift Card)
Why It Rocks You get to smell like a spring morning, whilst bringing sexy back.
Books make good kindling during our frigid winter. And Jillian Michael’s rock hard abs will haunt your dreams.
While they may not know you well, you just got a little richer. Plus, now you can fufill your own musical destiny to satisfy your listening pleasure.
Sometimes it looks nice. Sometimes it doesn’t end up jammed in the back of your closet. Sometimes... “I feel like a 70 year-old spinster who lives for her cats and One Tree Hill. In other words, I feel glamorous” - Jenny Schwartz
Gotta read up, because come June 2010, it’s time to hit theaters again.
It spices up any room, and it’s a plant with a face. Also, it has a catchy theme song. Ch-ch-ch-chia.
Um hey, you just got money. Stop complaining.