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THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

05


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2;8<0C4270=645>A0;; Loved the big focus on Bill McKibben and the 350.org international day of action calling for climate protection (â&#x20AC;&#x153;None Like It Hot,â&#x20AC;? Oct 21.)! I also appreciated the listing of the events that took place on Saturday, Oct. 24. I only take exception to the report about the Oct. 2 event at Sonoma Country Day School, emphasizing gray hair three times. It was subsequently mentioned that only a â&#x20AC;&#x153;handful of students in the top tierâ&#x20AC;? applauded. In fact, climate protection is a multi-age, multicultural concern, and that was well illustrated by the attendance in the crowd, and also at the 40 booths representing environmental groups, outside in the lobby. For example, the opening film was entirely focused on students, many of whom were in the audience on Oct. 2. The Academia Quinto Sol (green jobs training program), featured at one of the booths, displayed pictures of youth at risk who are being counseled about their culture, their worth to their community and their future. I rub shoulders with the next generation of

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activists consistently, as we work together to build movements for sustainability, peace and justice.

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bumper stickers on the back of Ford Explorers, so with regards to changing Americaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s consumption habits, from where I am sitting, he is failing miserably.

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60BB8=6>=C74?A4I Reality check: President Obama recently flew 6,000 miles round trip to San Francisco and back on Air Force One, a big Boeing 747, to help raise money for a political campaign. If the president was really concerned about global warming, why didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t he do the video-conferencing thing? I suppose if anyone could ever get close enough to the president to ask him about that, he would make some comment about pollution credits. Unfortunately, pollution credits do absolutely nothing about the CO2 that is going into the atmosphere right now. The pollution credit philosophy is all about building â&#x20AC;&#x153;environmentally friendlyâ&#x20AC;? power plants at some future point in time. President Obama campaigned on a platform of hope and change. I was hoping that the president would help to change Americaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s wasteful consumption habits. I still see lots of Obama

6>CC741;D4B>E4A20C46>A84B In your 2009 North Bay Music Awards (NORBAYs), you split the styles of jazz and blues and attached â&#x20AC;&#x153;R&Bâ&#x20AC;? to the blues category. I would like to bring to your attention that, as you have acknowledged in the past, R&B is really a category more aligned to soul and funk than the blues. Most, if not all, of your 2009 blues/R&Bnominated musicians are blues musicians who would not describe themselves as R&B players. For your 2010 NORBAY awards, would you please consider adding an R&B/soul/funk music classification, as you have done in the past? You will open up the NORBAYs to the many musicians and fans who regularly support R&B/soul/ funk bands.

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Vote John Reed for Fairfax Town Council. . . . John is one of the most valuable, resourceful and capable members of our community. . . . He is someone who cares about our town and its future. . . . Serving as chair of the Fairfax Volunteer Committee, he . . . is a member of the GPAC advisory committee to the planning commission and town council, and creator of the Safe Routes to School program. He secured $2.5 million for Fairfax, organizes and leads creekcleaning and brush-clearing forays, mapped publicly owned right of ways in case of an emergency evacuation . . . [and] helped to raise thousands of dollars for young victims of violent crime. . . . John is a model neighbor. . . . Everyone who knows him can tell you a story about the help heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s provided, fixing a plumbing problem or leaky roof, and always refusing to take a dime. He leads camping and sailing trips for his sonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Boy Scout troop. . . . He is one of the best captains Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve had the pleasure of sailing with. . . . In the vein of da Vinci, Franklin and Jefferson, John Reed is nothing less than a renaissance man. . . . He can fix anything. . . . He has worked in the motion picture industry. . . . This feeble attempt at describing the man doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even scratch the surface. One could take up several pages of this newspaper to list his contributions to the town, the entire newspaper to list his qualifications.

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06

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Reach the North Bayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Non Profit Donors in

The Bohemian's

Non-profit Guide Issue Date: November 18th The mission of our guide is to provide a bridge between our giving community and our regionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s non-profits. We believe that philanthropy is a lifelong commitment. Our goal is to enlighten all people, whether sharing large or small donations of time and money, to become our region's philanthropists.

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08

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news for Sonoma, Marin & Napa Counties

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Still the Official Newspaper of the Public Optionâ&#x20AC;?

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7>>:43 Dr. Michael Domeier (arms raised, center) and his team boat a great white shark near the Guadalupe Islands in this undated photo. The animal, a female, was tagged and released.

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A controversial plan to hook, boat and tag sharks heads out this week By Alastair Bland

5

ishing for great white sharks in California waters ended 15 years ago when legislation gave the fish full protection from pursuit, harassment and harm. This week, however, a Southern California marine research group is putting baited shark hooks in the waters near the Farallon Islands, spurring concern from others in the research and ecotourism communities that the procedureâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;which involves bringing the big fish aboard a vesselâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;could cause injury or death to the protected animals. The Marine Conservation Science Institute from San Diego County, headed by veteran shark researcher Dr. Michael Domeier, submitted a permit application early this year to the California Department of Fish and Game and to the National

Oceanic and Atmospheric Administration (NOAA) seeking permission to catch, boat, tag and release as many as 10 great white sharks within the boundaries of the Gulf of the Farallones National Marine Sanctuary while a film crew documents the project. The state and federal permits were both granted, and, weather permitting, Domeier will be fishing between Monday and Friday of this week, according to Maria Brown, superintendent of the sanctuary. Brown says that multiple marine biologists were consulted to determine whether allowing the sharks to be hooked, boated and taggedâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a procedure that Domeier has conducted on 11 white sharks at the Guadalupe Islands off the Baja California coastâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;could threaten the safety of the fish. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Everyone we consulted has been very positive about Domeierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s research,â&#x20AC;? Brown states. But Dr. Pete Klimley says he was among

those consulted and that he firmly warned NOAA officials against granting the permit. Klimley, a professor of marine sciences at UC Davis, has conducted tagging projects on sharks for 25 years using hand-held lances to set the tags. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I voiced serious concern about this issue when they came to me. Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re taking an animal thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s two tons and which needs the water to support its weight, and suddenly removing it from its environment.â&#x20AC;? Klimley speculates that internal organs could rupture, causing death days later, and that unborn pups inside a pregnant female could be squashed. Intentional capture of white sharks in California became illegal in 1994, and new regulations passed in March grant them additional protection in the Gulf of the Farallones National Marine Sanctuary. One of the new laws prohibits &%

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THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

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6A40CF78C4B70A:B

observers from approaching to within 50 meters of a white shark. Mick Menigoz, who has hosted shark-viewing trips to the Farallones for five years on his boat Superfish, says that he advocated for the tightening of protective measures for white sharks. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We pushed for the new regulations, and weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve bent over backwards for years to not hurt or bother the sharks,â&#x20AC;? Menigoz says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not even allowed to approach them, and now theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re letting these guys come in and use baited hooks to catch them. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be surprised if they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t kill one.â&#x20AC;?

Kimberly Henry

P L A S T I C S U R G E RY

MD

â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d be surprised if they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t kill one.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Mick Menigoz

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Domeier, who returned no phone calls or emails from the Bohemian, aims to fit captured sharks with advanced SPOT (smart position or temperature transmitting) devices. To install these, which communicate with satellites only when the sharks break the surface, researchers must drill a small hole in a sharkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s dorsal fin and bolt the tag in place. The operation requires hauling the animal onboard for as long as 20 minutes. Cameras, which sources say will be filming for National Geographic, will be rolling. Brown of the NOAA says that SPOT tags last longer than many existing transmitter types and, fitted to the dorsal fins of white sharks, could help to solve the unknowns about their migration patterns, such as whether the fish return to the Farallones on a strict annual or a biannual schedule. But Dr. Ken Goldman, now with the Alaska Department of Fish and Game but who tagged and studied white sharks in California extensively in the 1990s, wonders how significantly Domeierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SPOT tag project will contribute to the existing pool of knowledge of great white behavior, and he wonders if itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worth the risk. Goldman has seen large great whites die of stress-related causes days after capture and release by sport fishermen. â&#x20AC;&#x153;With great whites, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll take a long time to pull them in and handle them, and thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be a major stress factor on the fish,â&#x20AC;? Goldman says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m concerned that the sharks will be stressed, lose their capacity to maintain their core body temperature and die.â&#x20AC;? Superfish skipper Menigoz sits on the Gulf of the Farallones National Marine Sanctuaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s advisory council along with 12 other individuals. The councilâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s job, according to the sanctuaryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s website, is to provide â&#x20AC;&#x153;the Sanctuary manager with advice on the management of the Sanctuary.â&#x20AC;? But Menigoz says he was never consulted for his opinion on Domeierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s SPOT tagging project. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m very surprised I wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t contacted. At least a courtesy notice would have been nice, but itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s been top secret. Now everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s saying, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;How can this be happening in a sanctuary?â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Well, believe itâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s happening.â&#x20AC;?


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Socialism and the fall of post-Wall beliefs By Birgit Nielsen

C

wenty years ago, on Nov. 10, 1989, the day after the Berlin Wall fell, I saw unbridled joy in the smile of a young East Berliner. The event was incredible to him, and to me as a West Berliner, too. The two of us babbled over beers, searching for words big enough for our feelings. We found none, so we beamed instead. What made us, and everyone around us, so giddy was that the future didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t simply contain the possibility of being different and better, but the certainty of being so. How it would be different was unclear and entirely secondary. It was our moment in history. The previous night, Nov. 9, I had been driving my rusted VW Rabbit through a flurry of fat snowflakes when the news of the Wallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s demise came over the radio. Momentous events have a way of imprinting themselves by minutiae and for this, it was the squeak of my windshield wipers as I listened in disbelief to the fever-pitched words of the announcer. It seemed phenomenally crazy that the Wall would fall without a drop of blood or a fullfledged nuclear war. Neither the shift in the Eastern bloc that began with Gorbachevâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; not with Reaganâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 1987 photo-op speech at the Brandenburg Gate or the October demonstrations in East German citiesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;nor the exodus of thousands by train through Hungary into Austria, nor the refugees inside the West German embassy compound in Prague nor other unequivocal signs that socialist East Germany had diedâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;none of it had been able to topple the brutally unnatural border in our minds. History is made in an instant, but ideology is not that adaptable. This I learned in conversations with East Berliners during the weeks to come. After 40 years of division and 28 years of the Wall, we sought each otherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s company, brimming with curiosity and patience. Amazing to me, the East Germans voiced doubts about the new, â&#x20AC;&#x153;freeâ&#x20AC;? order of things, such as: What exactly was competition? What was so great about ambition? My optimism reached its limit in the ensuing debate. I smiled a lot in my sales pitch of democracy and found the unimpressed faces unnerving. Belief systems, mine as much as theirs, would have to be taken down one miserable brick at a time and not overnight like the cement

barrier and the state with it. And then the view changes. The first time I walked right past the deserted gray booths at the former border crossing into the countryside of Brandenburg, a landscape I had been able to see but not touch from car or train windows traveling on transit routes to West Germany, I could barely control my impulse to run. For so long, I had wanted to move freely inside this foreign state but couldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t. Despite all the personal freedom the encircled, amputated island of West Berlin provided, I wouldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve inevitably run into a wall or a border. In November 1989, I walked across barren, formerly stateowned fields, and that moment of openness and discovery was precious. Twenty years later, those same fields are now fenced, owned by corporations. While much of the East German population scrambled to learn the new rules of democracy and a free market, corporations and franchises seamlessly moved in. I questioned my enthusiasm: What percent of my eternal optimism was indoctrination of the Western kind? East Germans had lived from the cradle to the grave shackled to a state that ruled by the sheer intimation that it could, and yet many I talked to grieved the loss of the socialist ideal, mourned the fact that no one in this free society told them what to do and that no one took care of them. It sounded absurd to me at the time, but it does less so now. These same questions, now being raised in earnest in the Land of the Free, are less an indication that the dreaded socialism is coming (anyone who thinks it is doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what socialism is or was), but that the status quo of capitalism isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t really working anymore. What good is â&#x20AC;&#x153;freedomâ&#x20AC;? if you have to work several jobs just to stay alive, and no matter how much you work, you never win? As we commemorate the fall of one wall, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d do well to consider the ones we have built and are reinforcing. Dividing lines claim more than mere property, for all too quickly they become symbols of self-righteous belief.

It seemed phenomenally crazy that the Wall would fall without a drop of blood or a full-fledged nuclear war.

Birgit Nielsen is a freelance writer and translator who lives in Guerneville. Open Mic is a weekly feature in the Bohemian. We welcome your contribution. To have your topical essay of 700 words considered for publication, write openmic@bohemian.com.

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Miguel Hilario seeks Peruâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s hot seat for a cooler climate By Juliane Poirier

C

his really does impact our lives, whether we know it or not: a guy named Miguel Hilario wants to be the first tribal Amazonian president of Peru. And he plans to get there via Sebastopol, on a very green ticket with a very clever plan. Like Obama, Hilario is an unlikely candidate who appears to understand the power of grassroots organizing. In a phone interview, I asked him why North Bay people should care about his campaign. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Why would Americansâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;,â&#x20AC;? he began, then stopped and corrected his terminology. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Why would world citizens care about the first indigenous Amazonian Indian running for the presidency of Peru? Our major platform is the preservation of the rainforest as a way of combating global warming.â&#x20AC;? Brilliant strategy, I thought. If he appeals to our world citizenship, we damn well have to care. Especially since Peru is one of the largest holders of biodiversity in the world. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sixty percent of Peru is rainforest,â&#x20AC;? explains Hilario, who was born and raised in the Amazon. At ago 20, he was sponsored by Pat Parks of Sebastopol to come live in the United States, where he studied at Sonoma State University, earning an Oxford scholarship to study politics, and then a scholarship to Stanford where he earned a masterâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and a Ph.D. (Peruâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s current president is also a Stanford graduate.) Hilario, who lived in the Bay Area for 16 years while remaining actively involved in his own country, claims that past presidents of Peru have approved the clearing of rainforest to plant foods and corn for biofuels. â&#x20AC;&#x153;They are destroying the forest to fuel the cars of Europeans and Americans,â&#x20AC;? Hillario says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We want to preserve the Amazon rainforest as a way of combating both global warming and poverty.â&#x20AC;? Hilario plans to make Peru the capital of eco-tourism, allowing controlled development of eco-lodges and the employment of eco-tour guides. Hilario claims that his newly formed pluralist party, Movimiento Pluralista del Peru, is the first political party in that country to promote sustainable development and the implementation of human rights with

environmental rights. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I believe that there has to be development, but with humanitarian values,â&#x20AC;? he says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Not profits only, but improvement of the human condition.â&#x20AC;? Apparently, a climate-harming Bush legacy dogs all of South America. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Three years ago,â&#x20AC;? Hilario says, â&#x20AC;&#x153;the Brazilian president and Bush made a pact that Latin America would go into the business of creating biofuels to export to the U.S. so that North Americans could be less dependent on petroleum. Within that framework, there is a trend to plant corn and soybeans and sugar cane so we can convert these to biofuel and export them to the U.S. And then Peru signed a free-trade agreement with the U.S. two years ago. The Peruvian government has been giving way to international businesses to plant and grow these biofuels.â&#x20AC;? Rainforest being replaced by Frankencrops is not only an ugly image but a climate-heating mistake in the making. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Currently Peru has 1.2 million tourists per year,â&#x20AC;? Hilario explains. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We see increasing that to 5 million per year within five years. That inf lux will create jobs, from taxi drivers in Lima to eco-lodges in the Amazon. In our model, everybody wins. Private investors who develop hotels win, tourists connecting with nature win, dwellers in the Amazon win a better quality of life, and the world will win because weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re combating global warming. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Bay Area is full of very progressiveminded people,â&#x20AC;? he continues. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I want them to join me in this process to fight for the Amazon through political and intellectual process. It is not just an election in Peru. It is part of world citizenship to preserve the rainforest, part of serving humanity.â&#x20AC;? There it is again, that â&#x20AC;&#x153;world citizenâ&#x20AC;? term. Hilario plans to have a campaign office in Sonoma County and to recruit volunteers to work both here and in Peru. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We are asking volunteers for fundraising so we are not coopted by corporations,â&#x20AC;? Hilario explains.

Hilario plans to make Peru the capital of eco-tourism, allowing controlled development of eco-lodges and the employment of eco-tour guides.

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The public is invited to meet Miguel Hilario at a fundraising event on Sunday, Nov. 8, at the Sebastopol Community Center. 6pm. For details, contact Aron Parks at 707.543.6835.


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3<<1  1?6;8

<0BC4AB Josh Silvers, left, and Jeff Mall take their â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iron Chefâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;&#x201C; style partnership to print.

0;0=20<?14;;?7>C>6A0?7H*02?5>C>2><

DaQP]2^fQ^h Josh Silvers and Jeff Mall team up to offer two sides of wine country cooking By Gretchen Giles

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ometimes the timing is just right. Take 1959, for example, the year that Rodney Strong Vineyards was established. Or 1989, the year that Tom Kleinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s family took the winery over. Then thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s 1999, the year that chef Josh Silvers and his wife, Regina, opened Syrah restaurant in Santa Rosa. Three months later, chef Jeff Mall and his partner Scott Silva opened Zin restaurant in Healdsburg. All players celebrate significant anniversaries this year, Rodney Strong justifiably proud of 50 years of business, the Kleins proud of 20 years of stewardship of their iconic label, and Zin and Syrah making their restaurateurs proud to have endured for a decade. Why not celebrate the old-fashioned way, by cooking and eating and drinking andâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; absolutelyâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;teaming up on a cookbook? Which is exactly what Mall and Silvers have done with Down Home : Downtown Seasonal Recipes from Two Sonoma Wine Country Restaurants (Rodney Strong Vineyards; $24.95),

a book that pairs Mallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s informal Southern and Southwestern boots-on style with Silversâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; French- and Italian-inspired wine country cuisine. The two restaurants reflect the two styles, Zin eschewing table cloths and fuss for straightforward goodness, in most cases harvested directly from the Eastside Farm he and his wife, Susan, maintain; to Silverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s white tablecloths and elaborate tasting menus, the ingredients sourced from the best local providers. The two chefs often collaborate for charity events, and it was at just such a dinner, hosted by Rodney Strong, that Klein suggested the two create an Iron Chefâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;style partnership. Take the same main ingredient, whether it be a chicken or a cheesecake, and deliver it in each manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inimitable manner. Down Home : Downtown is the result of that pairing, and it is one of those cookbooks just as enjoyable to read as it is to open on the kitchen counter and use. Lusciously photographed by Alan Campbell and written by former San Francisco Chronicle wine editor Linda Murphy, Down Home : Downtown features recipes that a midlevel home chef can tackle and possibly even

wrestle directly to the plate. Whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fun to see how two different minds take the same essential ingredients and create wholly disparate end results. Mall is informally hailed as the local king of heirloom tomatoes, and wife Susan raises some 40 different varieties of chickens. The Malls give tomato starts away at the beginning of each summer, Jeff cures his own bacon and makes his own sausage. Theirs is a haute back-to-theland cuisine, hand-made and hand-raised and thoroughly delightful to them as an occupation. Silver and Regina are urbanites, devoted to the pleasures of the stove and the table, their young son Jackson and the new restaurant they are preparing to launch in his name. Where Mall uses grits, Silver uses mascarponeinfused polenta. Where Mall does rice pilaf, Silver does risotto. Where Silver serves fresh wild salmon, Mall does too; he just wraps his in bacon, a recurring ingredient and a personal obsession. Crab will be coming into season soon and the chefsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; recipes for the best use of local crab is a sterling example of the sameness and differences provided. &THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

17


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Jeff Mallâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Dungeness Crab Stuffed Avocados with Mango & Red Chile Dressing Red Chile Dressing 1â &#x201E;2 c. mayonnaise 1â &#x201E;4 c. Mae Ploy Sweet Chilli Sauce grated zest and juice of 2 limes 1â &#x201E;4 tsp. Tabasco sauce 1 tblsp. minced fresh chives kosher salt and freshly ground pepper to taste Crab Salad 2 ripe avocados, halved lengthwise and pitted 1 ripe mango, peeled and cut from the pit 8 ounces fresh lump Dungeness crabmeat, picked over for shell 2 tblsp. minced fresh chives kosher salt and freshly ground pepper to taste For the red chile dressing: In a small bowl, combine the mayonnaise, chilli sauce, lime zest and juice, Tabasco sauce, and chives. Stir to blend. Season with salt and pepper. For the crab salad: Scoop the flesh from each avocado half, reserving the skin. Cut the avocado flesh and the mango flesh into 1â &#x201E;4 inch dice. In a medium bowl, combine the crab, mango and chives. Add all but about 1â &#x201E;4 cup dressing and mix gently to coat. Gently fold in the diced avocado. Place 1 avocado skin on each of 4 plates, spoon crab salad into each half (you may have extra), and drizzle with the remaining dressing. Makes 4 first-course servings Josh Silverâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Crab Cakes with Sherry Mayonnaise Sherry Mayonnaise 3â &#x201E;4 c. mayonnaise, preferably Best Foods 2 tsp. sherry vinegar 1â &#x201E;2 tsp. sweet Hungarian paprika pinch of cayenne pepper Crab Cakes 12 oz. fresh lump crabmeat, picked over for shells 1â &#x201E;2 c. mayonnaise, preferably Best Foods 3 tbsp. finely chopped red bell pepper 3 tbsp. finely chopped celery 2 tbsp. finely chopped red onion 1 tbsp. chopped fresh flat-leaf parsley For the mayonnaise: In a small bowl, combine all the ingredients and stir to blend. Cover and refrigerate for up to 2 weeks. For the crab cakes: In a medium bowl, combine the crabmeat, mayonnaise, bell pepper, celery, onion, parsley, lemon juice, salt, and pepper; mix well. Add the panko gradually, a few tablespoons at a time, until the consistency is dry and slightly tacky to the touch. Form into 8 cakes about 2 1â &#x201E;2 inches wide and coat with more panko. In a large skillet, heat 1â &#x201E;4 inch oil over high heat until it shimmers. Add the crab cakes, working in batches if necessary to avoid crowding pan. Cook until nicely browned, about 3 minutes on each side. Using a slotted metal spatula, transfer to paper towels to drain briefly. Place 2 crab cakes on each of 4 salad plates, and serve with the sherry mayonnaise on the side. Makes 4 first-course servings

18

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN




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THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

19


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Free Wi-Fi â&#x20AC;&#x153;We serve organic local foodĂ&#x2030;Â&#x203A;Rent our space for your next party Check out our twitter page twitter.com/GuayakiMateBar

Performing in the AchĂŠ Room

ne of natureâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s perfect foods, the bean rarely gets its due. Reviled even in a rhyming run that agrees that theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re good for your heart, beans lack the glamorous cachet of other produce and, indeed, of other dried foods.

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Fri Nov 6th, 6:30 PM - $5 00 | All Ages Sam Vega | Maere | Scoundrels Sat Nov 7th,

6:30 PM | All Ages

Fundraiser for Freemind Media

But KSRO talk-show host Steve Garner and his pal, chef John Ash, aim to change all that by making the lowly legume the object of their 23rd annual Good Food Hour recipe contest. Original, you-made-it-up-yourself bean-based recipes must be received at the station no later than 5pm on Wednesday, Nov. 4. Post to PO Box 2158, Santa Rosa CA 95405; fax 707.571.1097; or email steve@ksro.com for a chance to be one of four contestants who will gather at G&G Market on Saturday, Nov. 7, to cook their best bean in a taste-off with judges, including Rancho Gordoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own Steve Sando, a man whoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s truly bean around. Prizes include free wine, cooking classes, gift certiďŹ cates and other booty. For more, go to www.ksro.com.

The new trust | Not to reason why | Scoundrels | silian rain The month of October The Mate bar is offering free Gourd Nite Every Wed 5pm-6:30pm We now have Yoga every Mon & Wed from 5 to 6:30 PM New students buy 2 classes and get one free!!!! 6782 Sebastopol Ave, Sebastopol

707-824-6644 www.guayaki.com Monâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Fri 11amâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;3pm | Closed Sat & Sun

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128 N. Main St, Sebastopol

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2 FOR 1 DINNER WITH PURCHASE OF 2 DRINKS

707.829.2822

BREAKFAST â&#x20AC;˘LUNCH â&#x20AC;˘DINNER

www.EastWestCafeSebastopol.com

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THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

21


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The Souverain Tasting Room on the square in Healdsburg invites you to stop by and enjoy our Harvest Special, 25% off on a purchase of 4 or more wines. Located at 308 B Center Street, Healdsburg 707-433-2822. Open 7 days a week, 11am - 6pm

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We are now offering a public tour of our historic winemaking facility!

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Please call the tasting room at 1-866-557-4970 to reserve this unforgettable experience! $10 per person tour and tasting only $35 tour, gourmet boxed lunch, and wine tasting Asti Winery 26150 Asti Post Office Road Cloverdale, CA Tours available 7 days a week 10 am - 5pm Š2009 Cellar No. 8, Napa, CA | www.CellarNo8.com

Rocket Cafe C A F E & C AT E R I N G

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Kudos to the owner, Mrs. Mona Dhar, and her brother and co-owner Sumeer Karihaloo, who manages the restaurant, for giving the North Bay its finest Indian restaurant, and to Chef Uddab for his ability to create Indian food that

transcends the ordinaryâ&#x20AC;?

Dinner - Wed-Sat 5:30-Closing Sunday 9:30-2pm Mon-â&#x20AC;?Industry Night Discountsâ&#x20AC;?

Cheapest Vacation Around!! 18812 Sonoma Hwy 707-933-9755

Jeff Cox â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Press Democrat

Show ad. Exp 11/30/09.

52 Mission Circle, Santa Rosa

22

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN



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THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

23


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uick, what was Californiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s second most popular tourist destination in the 1950s, rivaled only by Disneyland? Hint: The magic made there was explicitly forbidden by Uncle Walt. If you answered the Italian Swiss Colony at Asti, you must be of a certain age or one of the few visitors who have dropped in to the recently rechristened, time-capsule tasting room of Cellar No. 8.

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Founded in the 1880s, the ISC attracted Italian winemaking talent, garnered gold medals and became among the stateâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s most important wineries. In the 1960s, it was familiar to television audiences in the person of â&#x20AC;&#x153;that little old winemaker,â&#x20AC;? and in restaurants everywhere, straw-basket-wrapped ďŹ&#x201A;asks of â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tipoâ&#x20AC;? were as essential as furniture. Old timers tell of a beloved haunt where corks popped, taps ďŹ&#x201A;owed and the party went into the night. And then the doors closed for 20 years. The winemaking style was out of fashionâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the Asti facility pumped out sparkling wines, brandy, sweet and dry wines, grappa, and even â&#x20AC;&#x153;coffee wineâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;but subsequent owners didnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t bother remodeling the old tasting room, they just sealed it up. The happy result: Current owner Fosters Wine Estates reopened a virtually intact tasting room where visitors can walk the same wood ďŹ&#x201A;oors under Italian-Swiss motif beams, up to the same curvy barrel-stave bar. A barrel head on the wall bears the inscription, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Wines mellowed in redwood,â&#x20AC;? certainly an endorsement from another time, while photographs, souvenirs and a California Historical Landmark placard acknowledge the site. The displays were fun, the staff were great, and to behold and ponder the 19th-century marble carving of a gent in his dotage and his stocking cap, cradling what the caption says is his â&#x20AC;&#x153;last loveâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;a straw basket ďŹ&#x201A;askâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is nearly worth the trip alone. So whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s this Cellar No. 8? Fosters named it for the eighth cellar of the old buildings. Got itâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;I think. On to the wine. Cellar No. 8 is widely available in supermarkets at competitive pricesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;the 2008 California Pinot Noir is a solid sip for just $10â&#x20AC;&#x201D;but Sonoma County wines are available only at the tasting room. No straw-covered ďŹ&#x201A;asks, to my moderate disappointment. The whites were aromatic representatives of their respective varietals, while the crisp and modern 2008 Sonoma County RosĂŠ ($16) perked up my tongue; strawberry-raspberry fruit from the nose to the lips, ďŹ nishing nice and dry. The 2006 Dry Creek Valley Zinfandel ($20) is on the ripe, juicy side, with sweet blackberry scents trending to raisin; gobs of ďŹ&#x201A;avor on the woodsy, brambly palate ďŹ nish clean and dry. The dark horse of the list, the opaquely purple 2006 Petite Sirah ($20), has deep plum fruit and ďŹ&#x201A;akey pastry aromas that lead to a surprisingly lively, bright mouthful. Perfetto! Or so says that little old winetaster, me. Cellar No. 8, 26150 Asti Post OfďŹ ce Road, Cloverdale. Open daily 10amâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;5pm. Tasting fee $5; 10 percent off bottle purchase. 866.557.4970.

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24

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN



James Knight

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3. 9 9 9 6 A

9XeT1a^f] Readers Danned their best Brown for our annual writing contest

4

very year, we host a writing contest aptly named â&#x20AC;&#x153;Jive,â&#x20AC;? in which we start a story and you finish it. After a heated discussion over who was the more important writer for 2009â&#x20AC;&#x201D; Walt Whitman or Dan Brownâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;we wearily relented to Brownâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s bestselling genius (or rather, his genius at bestselling). Plus, even weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not so hard-hearted that we could enjoy making fun of Whitman. (Plus-plus: poetry. ) Readers Danned their best Brown by finishing our riveting, sure-to-be a bestselling story based on a movie by Ron Howard in 500 words or less, and we thank them for it. We celebrate the five winning writers, everyone who entered the contest and Bohemian readers in general next Wednesday, Nov. 4, at 6pm with an open reading of these witty treasures at our offices. This emphatically is a dessert-before-dinner dealie (I bake a cake), and is entirely cryptex-optional, but please RSVP at 707.527.1200. See you at 847 Fifth St., Santa Rosa. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Gretchen Giles

The Lost Digital Da Vinci Fortress Symbol Bob Lamedum stepped briskly out of the Louvre and glanced around. Located at 34 Rue du Louvre 75001 Paris, France, the building was impressive, even to a markology professor from a leading California State University. The April morning was fresh and inviting, but Bob was late for an appointment with his sometime mistress, the celebrated astrophysicist-cum-pole dancer AngĂŠle DĂŠmon. From there, he planned to meet his mentor, the prominent Odd Fellow and secret tax-dodger Solomon Mines. His phone rang. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Darn thing,â&#x20AC;? Bob thought. â&#x20AC;&#x153;How do I work this?â&#x20AC;? The phone was new, a gift from AngĂŠle, and Bob was still unused to its flip-top feature. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hello?â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Bob!â&#x20AC;? AngĂŠle cried, for AngĂŠle it was. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Solomon has been brutally kidnapped! You must return to California to find him!â&#x20AC;? Twelve hours later, Bob was in Solomonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s

Santa Rosa home. Looking around, he fondly saw that his friendâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s favorite touchstones were proudly displayed: a laminated parking ticket, a glass artichoke tumbling from a cornucopia, a sculpture of a sideways hand set nicely on the piano. But wait. Two items of the five were missing. Could they have anything to do with Solomonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brutal kidnapping? Bob leaned against a bookcase and felt it give, revealing . . . . . . what looked like a dark room with oddly shaped straps hanging from crisscross clotheslines. Against the walls stood glass-paneled closets, stacked with folded items in all colors of the rainbow. Bob, being a professor, knew immediately that he was in the presence of the worldâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s largest treasure trove of classical chastity belts. There were, for instance, the rough-hewn 12th-century specimens worn by women whose husbands had left on crusades to Jerusalem; a pretty nothing for Catherine de Medici; a replica of the fancy Bellifortis model for Queen Elizabeth I; and an early Tollyboy design that had inspired Benjamin Franklin to invent the lightning rod. '+ THE BOHEMIAN

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Across the room was a table loaded with books, scrolls, photographs, a pocket mirror and a purchase order from a vendor in Haifa, written in Aramaic. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Eureka,â&#x20AC;? Bob said to himself in perfect Greek, â&#x20AC;&#x153;thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s where Leonardo got his cockamamie idea of backwards writing, and the reading mirror is Solâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s touchstone number four.â&#x20AC;? Holding it slanted against the order slip, Bob read aloud, translating from the Aramaic: â&#x20AC;&#x153;Chastity belt, model Fortress, for Miss Mary of Magdala, to be delivered before Christmas, 32 A.D.â&#x20AC;?

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THE BOHEMIAN

Could they have anything to do with Solomonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brutal kidnapping? Bob leaned against a bookcase and felt it give, revealing . . . . . . a brace that had become looseâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;loose enough to dislodge the Five Books of Moses, each landing separately on the toes of Bobâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s right foot. As Lamedum lay spreadeagled on the floor staring up at the ceiling, enjoying the flash of pain clearing his mind, he recalled the two missing touchstones. There was a 12-ounce bottle of Pepsi-Cola, bronzed by an itinerant baby-shoe peddler, but the second artifact was far more precious. A green lucite desk lamp depicting a naked Britney Spears, hands together in supplication, head inclined heavenward. Two laserlike beams from Spearsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; nipples illuminated a spot on the bookcase where the Five Books had reposed. Where the books had stood, there was a small piece of paper. A Post-It! Someoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s shaky hand had scrawled, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Tween the Churches.â&#x20AC;?

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pole dancer, the California State University professor and the Prius were smashed by an 18-wheeler from Shasta, and it remains only to report that Solomon had used his fifth touchstone, passĂŠ-partout and lost symbol of every womanâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s freedom, invented by Leonardo da Vinci for Mona Lisa but designed to open all model Fortress chastity belts and any other lock, and freed himself from the heater.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Wulf Rehder



â&#x20AC;&#x153;If thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s so,â&#x20AC;? Bob mumbled to himself. â&#x20AC;&#x153;What then, prof ?â&#x20AC;? continued albinoblonde AngĂŠle DĂŠmon, suddenly behind him and pressing a gun into his lumbar region. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Then Mary Magdalene wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Jesusâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; wife, nor the mother of his daughter Sarah . . .â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Yep,â&#x20AC;? said AngĂŠle, â&#x20AC;&#x153;the foundations of the da Vinci Code would collapse and the damn book would be a total fraud. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s why those religious junk publishers have bandied together, paying me to end this eff-ing research into reading mirrors and chastity belts.â&#x20AC;? From her disdain of research, Bob realized that her doctorate in astrophysics was only a mail-order degree. Outside, a muscular editor from Doubleday was at the wheel of a Prius, and as they were driving to the Odd Fellowsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; lodge in Sebastopol, where Sol was padlocked to a heater, Bob said to the driver, â&#x20AC;&#x153;This reminds me of the worst sentence in the book: Almost inconceivably, the gun into which she was now staring was clutched in the pale hand of an enormous albino with long white hair. Only she is now me. You should have done something about almost inconceivably and into which.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Shut up,â&#x20AC;? said the pole dancer, â&#x20AC;&#x153;whatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s with Solâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s three touchstones?â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Oh, those,â&#x20AC;? said Lamedum, â&#x20AC;&#x153;they reminded him of the day he arrived in Santa Rosa. He got a parking ticket on Fourth Street, went to the Wells Fargo Center to hear Jeffrey Kahaneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s piano recital and enjoyed a cornucopia of wine, fruit and artichokes with me afterwards.â&#x20AC;? Suddenly, the muscular editor, the

Mines had been losing it for months, reflected Lamedum. Any normal soul would post on the fridge, but being an Odd Fellow, Mines had to be different. Vowing to enter Valhalla and â&#x20AC;&#x153;conquer Thorâ&#x20AC;? had been his latest obsession. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d immersed himself in mythology, the Middle Ages, and Scrabble since his adolescence in Bruges, and his megalomania was growing beyond control. Bob crawled outside, and hailed a taxi downtown to the Moon of Uranus to consult with AngĂŠle, who was working the pole on the magnetic north side of the dance floor. Arriving late, he sat to the side of the


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stage where the pole had taken on a peculiar sheen. “Sweat from her inner thighs,” Bob mused before discerning, in the pole’s reflection, the image of a bearded bald man in a white smock who looked eerily familiar. Thinking about the Post-It, he had a brilliant revelation. Britney and the Pepsi bottle were absent, but the clues they left remained. The letters P-E-P-S-I C-O-L-A floated about his brain and became . . . EPISCOPAL! They had churches, surmised Bob. And B-R-I-T-N-E-Y S-P-E-A-R-S . . . was an anagram for PRESBYTERIANS! Now “Tween the Churches” made more sense!

If he could just locate the churches which stood near each other, perhaps he could find, likely still obsessed with murdering Thor, the immutable Solomon. Maintaining close ties with clergy and astronomers, Angéle had no trouble uncovering the two churches that Mines must have been alluding to. A few professional offices stood between them, and they scoured the lobby directories for another clue. They saw optometrists, podiatrists, a proctologist and a dentist. Could Mines be nearby? The revelation jolted Bob’s mouth like a root canal. “Of course!” Tearing upstairs, he heard in his mind Solomon’s lisping voice. He wasn’t out to conquer Thor—he was talking about a cankersore! And there he was, asleep in the dental chair, a bald bearded man in a smock hovering over him. Bob recognized the IRS agent-cum-dentist immediately. He’d found Solomon, but it was too late. Tomato juice

stains on his shirt, his wallet empty, Mines was no more than a shell. His number in Folsom prison ended in a “nine.” For the next 10 years, Mines would indeed be an “odd” fellow.—Stephen D. Gross Could they have anything to do with Solomon’s brutal kidnapping? Bob leaned against a bookcase and felt it give, revealing . . . . . . a marking on the wall. Bob crouched for a closer look. “In all my years of markology, I’ve never seen the like! Whoever did this draws about as well as I can.” Which was to say it was utterly indecipherable. Bob whipped out his notebook. A sultry voice interrupted his scribbling. “What are you doing there, Bob?” said Angéle. He hadn’t expected her, but there she was standing in the doorway. “Oh hi, love,” he said distractedly. “Just found a clue from Solomon. Don’t know what it means, though. Two touchstones are missing.” “Not unlike your personal pronouns,” Angéle quipped. “Might you be referring to these?” She handed him the objects in question: a gold-enameled crab claw and a cryptex. Bob jumped to his feet. “But how did you . . . ?” “I received them in the mail along with this sealed note.” Bob finger-scissored the envelope and read: If you want to see your beloved mentor alive again, you might find a visit to San Francisco worth your while. Faster than one could say “Knights Templar,” Bob and Angéle were standing before an old Victorian-style mansion. They rang the bell and the front gate opened automatically. They made a cautious approach to the front door and slipped inside. “Stay on your guard,” Bob whispered. Just then, a cry for help. “Bob! I’m in here!”

It was Solomon. They traced his voice to the kitchen, only to find Solomon bound hand and foot to a chair. Curiously, he was covered in doughnut crumbs. “What’s happened to you? Are you all right?” said Bob as he rushed to undo the ropes. “They’re never going to get away with this. If they think force-feeding me doughnuts will make me squeal, they’ve got another thing coming!” Solomon fumed.

Knowing how sensitive he was about his figure, Bob and Angéle kept silent. “My captors number three,” Solomon continued, “and they’ll do anything to get their hands on my grandfather’s horde. This used to be his house, you know. I trust you uncovered my message?” Bob nodded. “Where’s the treasure, then?” said Angéle from behind a pulled gun. Three men were instantly beside her. “Angéle! Are you mad?!” “A far cry from a dance pole, I know,” she said with a wave of the gun. “But it gets the point across nonetheless.” “So it was you all along!” “Who else? I’ve been chasing Solomon’s treasure for years. Now, monsieur, if you would be so kind?”

“The two missing items were a tiny replica of Rodin’s Thinker and a miniature folding metal chair,” said Lamedum. “But what do they mean?” “The laminated parking ticket represents punishment for occupying a space too long. The glass hand’s thumb and forefinger configuration suggest feeding a mouth something . . . like a potato chip.” “Or an artichoke leaf ?” Angéle offered. “Good, good! Now consider the posture of the Thinker—it’s as if he is taking a constitutional.” “Yes, but what about the chair?” asked Angéle. “If the Thinker were seated upon the flat, metal chair while attempting a constitutional, the chair’s adhesion would result in maximum flatulence amplification.” “But how do these clues tie together?” “The parking ticket indicates the Thinker was taking too long to perform his business. If taking too long results in a punishment, i.e., Solomon’s being crushed, then what’s the opposite of taking too long between flatulence emissions?” “Rapid-fire flatulence.” “Excellent, Angéle! By eating artichoke leaves while sitting bare-bottomed on a metal chair one would emit rapid-fire, or staccato, flatulence emissions . . . “ “The Staccati!” gasped Angéle with exhilaration.

“Fine. The mark I left you is a map. It shows the treasure’s exact location,” Solomon said. “Of course!” Angéle was gone in an instant, followed by her henchmen. But all too late. The police were waiting. Bob and Solomon emerged into the daylight and waved as Angéle was cuffed and taken away. “Looks like the adventure’s ended before it even began,” Bob said. “Speak for yourself. I’ve still got 10 pounds of doughnuts to work off !” Bob held out the cryptex with a smile. “Care for an A-P-P-L-E instead?”—A+T Could they have anything to do with Solomon’s brutal kidnapping? Bob leaned against a bookcase and felt it give, revealing . . . . . . a secret chamber. Lamedum brushed through the cobwebs, held a lit candle before him and entered. He touched his candle’s flame to another in the room’s corner; its wick linked with 300 others, and instantly illuminated the room. Solomon Mines was tied down to the floor behind a thick plexiglass wall; a steel cable slowly lowered an enormous steel weight toward his chest. Lamedum’s eyes followed the cable to the gear that controlled it. Attached to the gear was the combination scroll. Lamedum noticed folding metal chairs and artichokes piled in the corner. Bob glanced at Solomon. “Solve the code!” Solomon silently mouthed from behind the wall. Angéle Démon slunk from the shadows like the pole dancer she was. “I found the entrance earlier—we must help him,” she said.

“Precisely. We must both assume the position to hit the right combination of staccato emissions to activate the scroll and stop the gear from lowering the weight onto Solomon. Quickly, pull down your pants—a man’s life is at stake!” Lamedum and Démon exposed their bare bottoms and sat on two nearby metal chairs. They then grabbed artichokes and nibbled the flesh from the leaves. Rapid successions of popping reports resounded from buttocks against metal chairs. Solomon looked desperate as the weight descended to an inch from his chest. “Again, hurry!” commanded Lamedum. They grimaced and nibbled more artichoke leaves. Machine-gun-like effluviums burst forth into the room. ' -

THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

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',

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s working!â&#x20AC;? cried DĂŠmon. The cylinders on the scroll spun and the weight stopped. The remaining tumblers aligned; the symbol fragments spelled out S-T-A-C-C-A-T-I, and the plexiglass wall slid back. Lamedum and DĂŠmon rushed into the room, their pants around their ankles, and untied Solomon Mines.

door lock and stepped behind the flocked velvet drape. Dust tickled his nose, but before he sneezed, AngĂŠleâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s perfume assailed his nostrils. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d know that pole-dancer anywhere, even in the dark. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thank God itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s you,â&#x20AC;? he said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Fox News antichrist poster is behind the bookcase, and it holds the secret of Solomon Minesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; kidnapping.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Whereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s the computer?â&#x20AC;? AngĂŠle was on it. She was the master of Youtube, the logical place to find any conspiracy relating to politics and the church. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I havenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t been able to find it,â&#x20AC;? Bob admitted, aggressively scratching his head. AngĂŠle smiled knowingly as she picked up an enormous fluffy, orange Persian, revealing Solomonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s laptop computer. Bob had seen the cat but thought it was some kind of bath mat. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s still warm,â&#x20AC;? Bob told her. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Solomon canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have been gone that long if he just used the computer.â&#x20AC;?

â&#x20AC;&#x153;Thank God, Lamedum, you saved my life!â&#x20AC;? Mines said. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Staccati were sure you could never solve such a ludicrous code and their secret would be safe forever.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Never underestimate a markologist,â&#x20AC;? Lamedum said, pulling up his trousers. â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Wray Cotterill Could they have anything to do with Solomonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s brutal kidnapping? Bob leaned against a bookcase and felt it give, revealing . . . . . . a life-size poster of Barack Obama. Bob stared at it for a few minutes until he found what he was searching for. The perpetrators had left a clue. In the bottom right corner of the poster was the Fox Newsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; symbol for the anti-Christ: a bolt of lightning. Talking to himself, the best way to solve any mystery, Bob said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s common knowledge that Jesus spoke Aramaic, but not everyone is aware that he also knew Hebrew. Since the Bible, which was written in Hebrew as soon as the Phoenicians discovered clay tablets, predicts the coming of the antichrist, we can follow the derivation and translation of the words. The Bible says the antichrist will come from the heavens, so it becomes obvious that the original word for light (from the sky), â&#x20AC;&#x153;barach,â&#x20AC;? has evolved into â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Barack.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? Bob congratulated himself for discovering the clue so quickly. As soon as he could find his mentorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s computer heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d have the answer to his whereabouts. Easier said than done. After a frantic search through the dark house, he found the light switch. It was of no avail because even with more light, the computer was missing. He heard the click of a key in the front

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â&#x20AC;&#x153;I think the cat just used it. How do you spell â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Barackâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;?â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Let me go back to the poster and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll tell you.â&#x20AC;? He struck his forehead. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Wait! Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m so stupid. Solomon is being kept in the White House.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Hmm. It wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be easy,â&#x20AC;? AngĂŠle said, â&#x20AC;&#x153;but I think with the right credentials we can gain access. Just so you know, Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not entering any building through the sewer again.â&#x20AC;? Whipping two press passes out of his tweed jacket, Bob waved them in front of her. â&#x20AC;&#x153;This time weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll enter in style.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;Uh, I think those were for a Led Zeppelin concert, Bob.â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x153;No worries, with a little Clorox, ink and a Xerox machine, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re in business.â&#x20AC;? It turned out to be unnecessary. Solomon had been abducted because he translated a document on Youtube, claiming the president was the antichrist. It was a simple matter to create another video proving that â&#x20AC;&#x153;barachâ&#x20AC;? actually meant â&#x20AC;&#x153;healthcareâ&#x20AC;? in Aramaic. So the White House had no further use for keeping Solomon prisoner. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re so smart,â&#x20AC;? AngĂŠle gushed. â&#x20AC;&#x153;When this is over, maybe we can make some more like us.â&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;Carol Collier


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Our twice-yearly look at what the neighbors are up to By Suzanne Daly, Gretchen Giles, Gabe Meline and Tori Masucci

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lmost murdered by her father at age three. Her throat slashed. Witness to her sistersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; murders. Her mother, grandmother and aunts violently killed. Carmina Salcido is a survivor. Many have read the numerous stories of RamĂłn Salcidoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s deadly Sonoma County rampage two decades ago, but few know the aftermath. In â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Not Lost Forever, My Story of Survivalâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (William Morrow: $25.99), Carmina Salcido describes her arduous road from victim to survivor with co-author Steve Jackson. Carminaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s story extends far beyond her brush with death. Given up for adoption by her grieving grandfather, the feisty little girl joined a family deeply ingrained in an ultra-strict, cultish Catholic organization Tradition, Family and Property. Isolated on a Midwestern farm, she was deprived of anything resembling a normal childhood and instead endured much abuse at the hands of her adoptive, alcoholic parents. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Escapingâ&#x20AC;? at age 17 to a Carmelite convent, she suffered from numerous physical and mental-health problems that landed her in the hospital. Deemed unfit for convent life, she was sent to a ranch in Idaho for troubled teen girls. Carmina and the other girls there endured more abuse, until she made her break for freedom at age 18. Contacting the grandfather who had been excluded from her life by her adoptive parents, Carmina reconnected with her past. Now back in Sonoma County, she has investigated and confronted the events that placed her on such a tough road, contacting family, friends and members of law enforcement and the press who could help shed light on her early life. The bookâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s short chapters read cleanly, and the 16 pages of color photos trace a full life lived in 23 short years. This resilient young woman has reached a level of understanding and forgiveness few would be able endure, let alone come out of with compassion and normalcy. Not Lost Forever is a testament that leaves readers with hope and admiration for Carminaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s survival.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.D.

F

ith her previous novel, The Great Far Away, a fictional memoir of idyllic bohemian life in Northern California, Santa Rosa author Joan Frank established herself. Her latest, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;In Envy Countryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (University of Notre Dame Press; $20), collects short stories published in journals around the country, from the Seattle Review to the Baltimore Review and

points in between, including Notre Dame and Chautauqua. Opening with â&#x20AC;&#x153;A Note on the Type,â&#x20AC;? a detailed, engrossing story of a conniving employee at a printing company who ascends from file folders to far-flung affairs, Frankâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s stories follow those in the throes and woes of love and life. With one eye inside the workings of her characters and one observing from afar, In Envy Country sets a Raymond Carver toneâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;a character from â&#x20AC;&#x153;Betting on Menâ&#x20AC;? is even named Carverâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;without the rampant selfannihilation and morbidity.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;G.M.

8

n the classic love story, two people find each other, overcome their dilemmas and fall in love. Yet Penngrove author Linda Loveland Reid, winner of the 2008 Redwood Writers Club contest, illustrates in her novel â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Touch of Magentaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (BookSurge Publishing, $18.99) that love is never that simple. The plot, weaving together the lives of two women whose pasts are veiled in secrecy, is actually antithetical to the classic romance. Set in Californiaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Gold Country, as well as San Francisco, Chinatown, Sacramento, Singapore, Italy and England, Reidâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s novel follows the tale of Corri Montclair, who in 1971 uncovers a shocking mystery in the pages of her dead motherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s will, sending her on a life-altering quest to discover the ghosts of her hidden past. Montclairâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s story is entwined with that of Pegeen Oâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;Connor, who falls into a shadowed romance with a Chinese boy against the racial constraints of 1895 California society. Reid paints a suspenseful portrait as Corri labors to solve the mysteries of her past, eventually crossing paths with the consequences of Pegeenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s deeds and the fate that brought their stories together, though separated by time. Touch of Magenta journeys into the unknown spheres of human nature and the way parts of our identities are determined by a compelling desire to untangle our pasts.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;T.M.

1

etween the rounds of housework and homework, a parentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s own life can quite easily slip away. But when the child leaves for college and the house is quiet for the first time in some 18 years, a parentâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s slipped-away life often becomes a massive void that bewilders. And so it is with Nora, the heroine of Santa Rosa author J. C. Millerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s novel â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;On the Brink of Noraâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Redwood Writers; $16). But Nora is not alone, sharing the book with her husband Eric and daughter Dani, each of whose stories are told in alternating chapters as the reader gets an omniscient view of the

life of one small Sonoma County family as they handle the dread empty nest, the dread midlife crisis, the dread adultery and even the dread growing-up-and-moving-away transition of young adulthood. Millerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s characters are people we know because they are usâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;fallible, astray, searching and trying to do what is honorable and right in this one single life we are given.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;G.G.

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arin County evokes images of rugged Northern California coastline, quirky hippie towns, Mount Tam, nouveau rich and, yes, hot tubs. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Visions of Marinâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Color and Light Editions; $39.95) vividly illustrates those evocations and many more through the luminous photography and descriptions of Inverness author/photographers Richard Blair and Kathleen Goodwin. Marin residents for 30-plus years, Blair and Goodwin have long rambled the roads and recesses of their home turf. Their photographs range from panoramic landscapes to the miniscule detritus found among beach jetsam. Short histories record local characters, events, buildings and foods,

and landscapes punctuate the 415 (mostly) colored photographs in this coffee-table tome. The impressive detail and quality exhibited throughout the book is evidence of a labor of love from the husband and wife team.Visions of Marin will be a welcome addition to libraries of both locals and California dreamers.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.D.

9

oel Kramerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Passionate Mind, originally published in 1974, offered an informed, intellectual whole-life theory of living self-reflexively in the moment, and became a â&#x20AC;&#x153;life handbookâ&#x20AC;? for many of the age of enlightenment. This year, Kramer, a Bolinas resident, with co-author Diana Alstead, offers â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Passionate Mind Revisitedâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (North Atlantic Books; $16.95), a complete reworking of the original. To live in the moment, Kramer and Alstead clarify, we as a species must have a cognizant grasp of both our past and our future. Unless we can expand our awareness to a broader social rangeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;making our ego work for the planet, changing our detached mindset and questioning our beliefs, for exampleâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;our future will be bleak indeed. Rife (%

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Prohibitionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s history of hardship in the wine country Prohibition caught the winemakers of Sonoma and Napa counties by surprise. Until the Volstead Act was actually passed in October 1919, few thought it would extend beyond hard liquor to include beer and wine, nor did Californians, who widely opposed the efforts of the Anti-Saloon League, expect their state legislators to vote to ratify the 18th Amendment. They were wrong on both counts. The events that followed are the meat of Vivienne Soznowskiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s meticulously researched history, When the Rivers Ran Red: An Amazing Story of Courage and Triumph in Americaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Wine Country (Palgrave Macmillan; $26.95). A part-time Healdsburg resident and former journalist with the Washington Examiner and the San Francisco Examiner, Soznowski has drawn on oral histories from aging survivors from those harsh years as well as contemporary newspaper accounts to craft her account of â&#x20AC;&#x153;14 years of real trial,â&#x20AC;? as they played out across the two wine counties. Surprisingly, the first years were boom times. A pre-existing law, unaffected by Prohibition, allowed anyone to make up to 200 gallons of wine for their own use. Local growers soon realized â&#x20AC;&#x153;there was this incredible demand for grapesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; in New York and Chicago and Atlanta,â&#x20AC;? Soznowski relates. â&#x20AC;&#x153;So instead of selling the wine readymade, they were selling grapes across the nation so that people could make their 200 gallons.â&#x20AC;? Prices soared from $25 per ton to 10 times that amount, until the Central Valleyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s table grape growers flooded the market with their own newly planted wine grapes, and, Soznowski writes, â&#x20AC;&#x153;the market just crashed and burned.â&#x20AC;? Bootlegging became a way of life for many families as they struggled to survive, but their carefully preserved vats of aging wine were constantly at risk. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Prohibition agents would come up with their guns and just pull the plugs on these wonderful old redwood vats of wine,â&#x20AC;? the author recounts indignantly. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The wine would run everywhere, over gardens, through fields, it ran into ditches, down into the little creeks and then into rivers,â&#x20AC;? providing her book with its title. â&#x20AC;&#x153;People lost fruit trees, and their gardens were wrecked,â&#x20AC;? she continues, â&#x20AC;&#x153;and of course they lost this amazing resource, the one major movable asset in their lives. Millions of gallons of wine, it was just lost, all their hard work, lost.â&#x20AC;? Also lost was a generation of winemaking knowledge and experience, she writes, a deficit that took the regionâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s industry â&#x20AC;&#x153;decades to get back to perhaps where it might have been.â&#x20AC;?

Bruce Robinson

THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

29


EVERYONEâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;S GOT AN OPINION

Harmony was a capitalist plot to sell â&#x20AC;? pianos!

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with Kramerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s roots in yoga, science and comparative religion, The Passionate Mind Revisited is a vigorous read for those disenchanted with sacred cows.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;G.M.

8

-THE COMPOSER

UNTITLED-THEMOVIE.COM â&#x20AC;˘ IN THEATERS NOVEMBER 6

n â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Walks: Best Poemsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Footprint Press; $15), Greenbrae poet B. J. Stolbov invites his readers to stroll beside him as he journeys through manhood. Stolbov is often subtle, employing a careful, conscious meter when threading the emotion of love through his poems; he is also often chaotic, detailing an anthill that buzzes with hurried life. Either way, his work is defined by precise thoughts, brief moments in time that account for a larger social commentary on the pursuit of spiritual fulfillment or the larger American dream. A keen glimpse into the poetâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mind, Walks is a compilation that follows Stolbovâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s clear message, â&#x20AC;&#x153;It is my work / This being a wandererâ&#x20AC;? through both writing and life itself.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;T.M.

8

f it werenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t for Kurt Cobainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ghastly suicide on April 5, 1994, the trope of the rock starâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s untimely death might have receded into distant memory. David Comfortâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Rock and Roll Book of the Deadâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Citadel Press; $15.95) keeps the stories alive by weaving Cobain in with Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, Elvis Presley, John Lennon and Jerry Garcia, finding connections between all seven â&#x20AC;&#x153;rock immortalsâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;their lonely childhoods, their desire to escape and their sudden and often suspicious deaths. Some, like Cobainâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, are scrutinized fiercely by this Santa Rosa author, while others are retold with the acceptance of timeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s passing. Comfortâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ultimate success is an outline of the vagaries of fame and how it delivers on its promise for a price often mortally high.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;G.M.

B

ausalito art dealer Richard Polsky is no schmo. He knows who to call at the large auction houses like Christieâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s and Sothebyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s, heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s conversant with artworld insiders and he used to own a real Andy Warhol. His Fright Wig work, so-called because the self-portrait features Andy in an on-end white wig, was a piece that made Polsky glad to own, glad to look at. It did what art can sometimes do: it made Polsky actually happy. But his wife was running up credit card bills that were breaking him, and another dealer was interested. Maybe Polsky should sell the work, recoup a couple hundred thou, pay Visa off and relax a little. After some sleuthing, due diligence and thinking, he did. And then the art market exploded, and suddenly Warhols were commanding eight figures, not six, and Polsky was left out in the dust. In his chatty insider tome â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;I Sold Andy Warhol (Too Soon)â&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Other Press; $29.95), Polsky uses a conversational tone to explain what happened in the art market and how. For those who care about the business of art with even the slightest fervor they feel for works of art themselves, I Sold Andy Warhol offers a fascinating

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glimpse behind the walls of the galleries, auction houses and museums that make good art good business.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;G.G.

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uch like a New Age female Harry Potter, the heroine of â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Schizandra and the Gates of Muâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; by Laura Bruno (International Renaissance Press; $16), Schizandra Ginger Parker loses her parents under tragic and slightly suspicious conditions. Like Harry, she enters a world of magical creatures and mysterious spirits which help or hinder her attempts to fight darkness and find the light in the universe. Adding to the mystification are an addicted cocoa-pod-popping, shift-shaping queen, talking crystals and a galactic butterfly that Schizandra encounters in underground passages while in a coma-like sleep. Readers get a blow-by-blow Tarot card/numerology/ astrological reading which explains the heroineâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s back story, and how her ultimate destiny will change the world when its mythical end occurs in 2012.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.D.

0

collection of essays addressing the needed marriage of two very green issues, organic farming and wildlife conservation, has been carefully collected and edited by Healdsburg resident Daniel Imhoff and Jo Ann Baumgartner. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Farming and the Fate of Wild Nature: Essays on Conservation-Based Agricultureâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Watershed Media; $16.95) lends a forum for luminaries such as Michael Pollan, Wendell Berry and Barbara Kingsolver, among others, to advocate for the need to change current agricultural and conservation practices. The book is divided into four sections which concentrate on such core issues as the condition of salmon or bee populations, the challenges of biodiversity, and finally, the influences of society and culture on agrarian practices and native wildlife. This is Imhoff â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s second volume of essays published through his own nonprofit Watershed Media and the first collaboration with the Baumgartner, director of the Wild Farm Alliance, an organization which promotes agriculture that aids in the protection and restoration of wild flora and fauna.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;S.D.

5

orestville author and editor Barbara Baer has been looking east a lot lately. Under her own Floreant Press imprint, she last published Pomegranate Roads: A Soviet Botanistsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Exile from Eden. This year she gives us the novella â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Grisha the Scrivenerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; (Ghost Road Press; $15.95), an old-fashioned story of a midcareer journalist with a gift for seeing occasional beauty who is in search of many things, the true nature of Mother Russia among them. Cynical yet easily humbled, Gregory Gregorovich Samidze of Uzbekistan feels lust and disgust in equal measure as he navigates through the shuttered world of mid-20th-century Soviet malaise. Baerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s language and eye are striking as always, keeping her dense topic as tightly woven as an excellent Tashkent rug.â&#x20AC;&#x201D;G.G.


369:

54A0; Charlotte Gainsbourg loses it in â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Antichrist.â&#x20AC;&#x2122;

2PQX] 5TeTa

Lars von Trierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Antichristâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; pits sex against nature in upside-down Eden By Richard von Busack

C

he most prestigious gross-out since Irreversible, Lars von Trierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Antichrist is billed as a directorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s return to instinctive filmmaking. Von Trierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s â&#x20AC;&#x153;Your guess is as good as mineâ&#x20AC;? approach includes comments such as â&#x20AC;&#x153;I let this film flow to me instead of thinking it up.â&#x20AC;? This might be the best way to take in Antichrist, as a triple-X shocker, giving it merit for its fussy surfaces and its unquestionable power to disgust. And when von Trier (Breaking the Waves, etc.) describes Antichrist as a way back after two years of crippling depression, it seems even more critic-proof. Slamming it would be like mocking some mental patientâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s art-therapy project. Calling Antichrist â&#x20AC;&#x153;misogynistâ&#x20AC;? isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t fair. The man in the story (called only â&#x20AC;&#x153;He,â&#x20AC;? played by Willem Dafoe) is a platitudinous artist when heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not being a meat-pestle. And the beastliness in the woman (called â&#x20AC;&#x153;Sheâ&#x20AC;?) is a response to his power plays, his pretenses of being learned and in control. A truly misogynist film echoes Freudâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s guess that women donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know what they want. She (Charlotte Gainsbourg) does know. First, she wants her man; second, she wants to fuck the pain away. Von Trier gives women their due as forces of nature, even from a superstitious peasant angle: are they sorceresses, then, since they can create life? (Did von Trier cast Gainsbourg because of

her resemblance to Margaret Hamilton, the Wicked Witch of the West?) As for Antichristâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s spine as a horror film, no excuse is needed. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s about the heebiejeebies caused by nature. She and He are seen at the beginning, sexing it up vigorously in ultra-slow-motion. Their toddler ambles in, leers at the primal scene and then apparently kills himself. She falls into a big orgasm just as her child falls out the window. The dead child is named, significantly â&#x20AC;&#x153;Nickâ&#x20AC;?; one clue (and we get another) that this was the young antichrist awaiting some fearful resurrection. She stews in her own depression in a claustrophobic apartment. He decides to take up the role of grief therapist to his mate. He is apparently a psychologist, but we donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t know that for sure: all we know is that He is not a doctor. The couple moves to their cabin in a dank forest. It looks trollhaunted, with white slashes of birch trees glowing in the gloom. She hadnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t wanted to come back. She had been holed up in the cabin, working on her womenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s-study thesis about the history of crimes against women. He had called it glib. The cabin is named, surely euphemistically, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Eden.â&#x20AC;? The plot is a reversal on Genesis. Seemingly, the sex act took this unhappy couple back to Eden, where they are to be punished by nature and each other. Her desire for sex grows. Visions of diseased, supernatural animals torment the man, which include a ludicrous, rotting talking fox, whose two-word growl, â&#x20AC;&#x153;Chaos reigns,â&#x20AC;? could be the title of the next Spinal Tap album. Things having got as sexual as they can, terrible violence breaks out. For no good reason, von Trier marks his film out with episodesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;is there a better way to shake an audience out of a mood of horror? But are we supposed to be horrified, or are we supposed to think of this as an intellectual exercise with nut-busting and mutilation? Von Trier comes up with downy, glossy images and then frames them, freezes them down. Von Trierâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s beefing against the fecundity of nature, signified by the pelting of acorns on â&#x20AC;&#x153;Edenâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;sâ&#x20AC;? roof, canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be taken seriously. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s like describing that scene in The Wizard of Oz where the trees throw their apples as a symbol of nature against man. We get so many movies made by people who seemed never to have set foot outside of a movie theater, and von Trier is just another one; thanks to digitizing, this wilderness is really as composed as an English country garden. The thesis could use an argument: such as William Blakeâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s line that â&#x20AC;&#x153;the lust of the goat is the glory of God.â&#x20AC;? What makes Antichrist so frustrating is that it has effective horror moments, such as the Lovecraftian passage of He discovering three new constellations in the night sky. David Lynch has had more success in filming this dream-journal-type material and making it terrifying. When von Trier mentions that Antichrist inspiration came from August Strindberg, he lets us know why this film looks overcooked even if it was underanalyzed. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Antichristâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; opens on Friday, Oct. 30, at the Smith Rafael Film Center, 1118 Fourth St., San Rafael. 415.3454.1222.

THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

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415 Center Street

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ssic Film Series Presents the Fall Cla Bargain Tuesday Tuesday -- $7.50 $7.50 All All Shows Shows Bargain Bargain Tuesday - $7.00 All Shows Schedule Schedule for for Fri, Fri, Feb Oct 20th 30th â&#x20AC;&#x201C;â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Thu, Thu, Feb Nov26th 5th Schedule for Fri, June 22nd - Thu, June 28th

October 29 & 30

Award â&#x20AC;&#x153;A StellarAcademy Performance ByNominee Michael Sheen!â&#x20AC;? Language Film!Stone â&#x20AC;&#x201C; USA Today â&#x20AC;&#x153;RawBest andForeign Riveting!â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Rolling

WALTZ WITH HEART BASHIR A MIGHTY THE DAMNED UNITED

November 5 & 6

(1:00) 3:00 (12:30) 2:45 5:00 5:00 7:00 7:20 9:15 9:45 R (1:15) 3:30 5:30 7:40 9:45 RR 2 Academy Award Noms Including Actor! â&#x20AC;&#x153;TerriďŹ c! Universal In Every SingleBest Instance!â&#x20AC;?

â&#x20AC;&#x153;A Triumph!â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201C; New York Observer WRESTLER â&#x20AC;&#x201C; THE Hollywood Reporter (12:20) 5:10 9:45 R LA2:45 VIE EN 7:30 ROSE AMREEKA (12:45) 3:45 6:45 9:45 PG-13 10 Academy Award Best Picture! (1:00) 3:15 Noms 7:45 Including 9:50 PG-13

November 12 & 13

SLUMDOG MILLIONAIRE â&#x20AC;&#x153;ä&#x2013;&#x;ä&#x2013;&#x;ä&#x2013;&#x;ä&#x2013;&#x; â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Really, Truly, Deeply â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 4:00 7:10 R McGregor OneSwank of (1:15) This Richard Yearâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Best!â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201C; Newsday Hilary Gere9:40 Ewan â&#x20AC;&#x153;Grand Entertainment In The Best Tradition Of The ONCE 8 Academy Award Noms Including Movies! Simply Soars!â&#x20AC;? (1:00) 3:10 R â&#x20AC;&#x201C; 7:30 Backstage Magazine Best Picture, Best5:20 Actor & Best9:40 Director! Please Note: No 1:00 or 3:15 Shows Wed

MILK AMELIA

(1:30) 4:15 7:00Funny!â&#x20AC;? 9:20 RRâ&#x20AC;&#x201C; Newsweek â&#x20AC;&#x153;Wise, Humble and Effortlessly (1:30) 4:10 6:45 9:30

WAITRESS â&#x20AC;&#x153;Audaciously Funny, Original, And Resonant! Please Note: No 1:30 Show Sat, No 6:45 Show Thu

(1:30) 4:00 7:10 9:30 Best R 5 Academy Award Including Picture! Remarkable!â&#x20AC;? â&#x20AC;&#x201C;Noms Entertainment Weekly

AFROST/NIXON SERIOUS MAN

November 19 & 20 BVc`aROgSdS\W\UaO\R4`WROg[ObW\SSa4WZ[aeWZZPS^`SaS\bSRW\ OcRWb]`Wc[aacWbOPZST]`OZZOUSa0Sac`Sb]Q][SSO`ZgO\RS\X]gO UZOaa]TA]\][O1]c\bgeW\SW\]c`eW\SPO` 4]`[]`SW\T]`[ObW]\O\RaV]ebW[Sa^ZSOaSQOZZ# !!]`dWaWb caObeeea`S\bS`bOW\[S\bU`^Q][

(2:15)Mysterious, 7:20 R â&#x20AC;&#x153;Swoonly Romatic, (2:00) 4:45 7:30 9:40Hilarious!â&#x20AC;? R Slant Magazine Please â&#x20AC;&#x201C;Note: No 7:30 Show Wed

REVOLUTIONARY ROAD

PARIS, JE Tâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;AIME â&#x20AC;&#x153;Rich, Sensuous & Inspiring!â&#x20AC;? (11:45) 4:45 9:50â&#x20AC;&#x201C; RUS Weekly (1:15) 4:15 7:00 9:30 R

Kevin Jorgenson the California Premiere of COCOpresents BEFORE CHANEL

(1:40) 4:30 7:20 9:30 PG-13 NoFLICK 9:30 Show Wed PURE: A BOULDERING Michael Mooreâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Thu, Feb 26th at 7:15

CAPITALISM: A LOVE STORY SICKO MOVIES MORNING 5:15IN R THE No Show Wed

Starts Fri, June 29th! Fri, Sat, Sun & Mon Advance Tickets IN On Sale at Box OfďŹ ce! MOVIES THENow MORNING FROZEN RIVER (12:00)Fri, 2:30 Sat, 5:00 Sun &7:30 Mon 10:009:50 AM 10:15 VICKY CRISTINA 10:45 AM AM BRIGHT STAR BARCELONA 10:20 AM CHANGELING 10:50 AM AMREEKA Venessa Redgrave Meryl Streep Glenn CloseAM 10:40 RACHEL GETTING MARRIED 11:00 AM MY ONE AND ONLY 11:10 AM AM 2009 LIVE ACTION SHORTS EVENING NEW YORK I LOVE YOU (Fri/Mon Only)) 10:45 10:45 11:15 AM AM 2009 ANIMATED SHORTS (Sun Only) CAPITALISM: AStarts LOVE STORY Fri, June 29th!

?>BC7D<>DB?A>58C Jackson mania looks to be re-whipped.

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32

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN



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Film capsules by Richard von Busack, Eloy Camacho and Jeff Latta.

Specializing in Hydroponics

Open Sundays!

7%34#/5.49¤3&5,,3%26)#%

'!2$%.3500,9 2661 South Old Gravenstein Hwy. Suite E Sebastopol

707- 829-7668 Open 7 Days

THE BOHEMIAN

Next to the Watertower

10.28.09-11.03.09

33


the last day saloon nightclub & restaurant the best place for live music, dancing and dining THE BAR AND RESTAURANT OPENS ON ALL SHOW DAYS AT 4 PM

10/29 7:30 PM SHOW > $7 > IMPROV COMEDY

WORLD'S BIGGEST COMEDY DUO + MOWZ

10/30 9:00 PM SHOW > $10 > POP ROCK

NEVERLAND 14 PIECE MICHAEL JACKSON TRIBUTE + dj on-que 10/31 9:00 PM SHOW > $10/13 > 70'S-90'S DANCE HALLOWEEN PARTY WITH

THE CHEE S EBALL S

+ dj on-que COSTUME CONTEST W/CASH PRIZES

11/3 8:00 PM SHOW > $10 > ROOTS

GREENSKY BLUEGRASS + MONTANA SLIM + the brothers comatose 11/5 9:00 PM SHOW > $10/13 > R&B HIP HOP

MAC MALL + RAPPIN 4 TAY + AT ALL COSTS + SKEE-LO + AARON "AY" YOUNG

Bfrom rews the world &Tasty Paround ub Grub

Hand-Crafted

11/6 8:30 PM SHOW > $8/10 > AMERICANA

! He’s back

THE SUN KINGS Oct 31 Costume Contest! Fabulous Prizes!

Come dressed as your favorite Beatle or Beatle song character 8:30pm

Bill champlin

formerly with chicago all shows are 21+ unless noted

Nov 1

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN

FEATURING KAYE RODDEN 5:00pm

THE RANCHO ALLSTARS

Fri

Friday, Oct 30 @ 9pm

Crystal Awareness Live Electronic Soundscapes

Nov 6

Great Dance Band! 8:30pm

THE ZYDECO FLAMES

Sat

Nov 7

West Coast’s Premier Zydeco Band 8:30pm

DANNY UZILEVSKY BILL KIRCHEN AND FRIENDS

Sun

Saturday, Oct 31 @ 4pm

DJ JPS Saturday, Oct 31 @ 9pm

Prized Pig

Nov 8

4:00pm / In The Bar 7:30pm

DAVE GLEASON AND THE

Fri

Nov 13 GOLDEN CADILLACS

Country Rock Extravaganza 8:30pm

JOHNNY ALLAIR’S Nov 14 Gratitude Rock’n Roll Dance Party Sat

8:30pm

Sun

Nov 15

HOUSTON JONES

for reservations: 707.545.5876

Sunday, Nov 1 @ 12pm

707.545.2343

Radio KBOB

120 5th street @ davis street santa rosa, ca

Acoustic Folk

THURS, NOV 26, NOON–7PM

707.874.9037 | www.barleynhops.com 3688 Bohemian Highway, Occidental

Outdoor Dining 7 Days a Week

lastdaysaloon.com 34

SWEET LEAF DUO

Sun

+ THE LAST VEGAS + COCKPIT

(RECORD RELEASE)

SF’s Wildest Swing Big Band 8:30pm

Sat

SUPERSUCKERS

two time grammy winner

EST. 1941

20 min from downtown Petaluma, 25 min from everywhere else!

“Devils Night” Oct 30 LEE PRESSON AND THE NAILS

11/12 8:30 PM SHOW > $12/15 > ROCK & ROLL

11/14 8:00 PM SHOW > $20/25 > BLUES

“A Historic West Marin Landmark” Fri

LAUGHING GRAVY

tHE PULSATORS + VOLKER STRIFLER BAND + THE BONAFIDE BLUE

Reservations advised

HALLOWEEN WEEKEND

a musical celebration of gram parsons by

11/13 8:30 PM SHOW > $10 > BLUES

Take a scenic drive for a unique dining experience

Dinner and a Show

It’s a CD Release Party! 4:00pm

THANKSGIVING DINNER Reservations Advised

415.662.2219

On the Town Square, Nicasio www.ranchonicasio.com


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interviews with Latino residents screen in the lobby during the festive concert on Saturday, Oct. 31, at the Jackson Theater. Sonoma Country Day School, 4400 Day School Place, Santa Rosa. 8pm. $25â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$32. 707.546.8742.

8 DI6I >

Set â&#x20AC;&#x2122;Em Up, John There are bartenders and then there are bartenders. First settling behind the bar at the Tradewinds in Cotati in the 1970s, John Gaines falls into the latter, emphasized category. Gaines listened to tales of woe and poured stiff ones for three decades at the Tradewinds before running Johnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cafe at the Black Cat in Penngrove; he is, as they say, an institution. But even institutions can have health issues. Kidney and liver failure have left Gaines with sizable medical bills, and an all-day benefit featuring Volker Strif ler, the Pulsators, Levi Lloyd, A Case of the Willys, Detroit Disciples, Hillside Fire, Joel Rudinow and more aims to raise money for the ailing comrade. â&#x20AC;&#x153;He was just a constant,â&#x20AC;? says the Tradewindsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; current bartender. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It wasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a Sunday morning with football without John.â&#x20AC;? Leave an extra tip on the bar on Sunday, Nov. 1, at the Tradewinds. 8210 Old Redwood Hwy., Cotati. Noon. $10. 707.795.7878.

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On Remembering Spanning three special concerts, the Santa Rosa Symphony Chamber Playersâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Festival of Remembrance is designed for its audience to ref lect on and more deeply understand a trio of historically significant events: Dia de los Muertos, the internment of Japanese residents in concentration camps during World War II and the Nazi holocaust. Local musicians, a rabbi, a journalist, an oral historian and local leaders all contribute to the performances, replete with audio-visual sets and art. The series kicks off with pieces by acclaimed Mexican composers Carlos ChĂĄvez (String Quartet no. 3) and Silvestre Revueltas (String Quartet no. 4, Musica de Feria), augmented by locals Trio Nuevo Amanecer. Linda Lemus speaks on the holiday and recorded

C6E6

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You canâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t accuse the members of Grateful Dead of not trying to engage world leaders. As a member of the Bohemian Club, Bob Weir has the opportunity to kibbutz with the top dogs of insider politics and corporate profiteering; as a member of Scaring the Children, a side project with bassist Rob Wasserman and drummer Jay Lane, he has the opportunity to engage the Global Security Institute, which was founded by Alan Cranston and includes Mikhail Gorbachev on its board of directors. Scaring the Children plays this weekend in an acoustic concert presented by the GSI to resurrect the terrifying truth that nuclear weapons are destructive and immoral, preceded by a forum including Kim Campbell, the former Prime Minister of Canada, disarmament expert Thomas Graham Jr., and GSI president Jonathan Granoff on Sunday, Nov. 1, at the Napa Valley Opera House. 1030 Main St., Napa. Forum at 4pm is free; concert at 7:30pm is $75. 707.226.7372.

H 6 C G 6 ;6: A

Allâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Welles In addition to Laughing Sal and Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s-Its ice cream sandwiches, the fondly remembered Playland at San Franciscoâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Ocean Beach also inspired one of the most tension-filled film endings in old Hollywood. The hall of mirrors scene from â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Lady from Shanghaiâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; thrillingly

climaxes one of Orson Wellesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; most plagued moviesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;he owed it to Columbia Pictures to repay a loan, mindlessly pitched a nonexistent plot, cast his estranged wife Rita Hayworth in the lead role and admitted, afterward, that it made little sense. But the film noir captures a wonderful vision of San Francisco and, in some scenes, the Sausalito waterfront. For a special screening in San Rafael, Wellesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; own daughter Chris Welles Feder will be on hand to discuss the film, her fatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s genius and her new book, In My Fatherâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Shadow: A Daughter Remembers Orson Welles. See film history come alive on Monday, Nov. 2, at the Rafael Film Center. 1118 Fourth St., San Rafael. 7pm. $10. 415.454.1222.

C6E6

Trick or Treatment Since Napa has no real gay bar, a group of friends called Team Guerrilla bounce around the valley hosting what they call the Napa Guerrilla Gay Bar. The idea is simple: to descend on a local pub or bar and make it â&#x20AC;&#x153;gay for a dayâ&#x20AC;? with fabulous fashion sense and even more fabulous dancing. So far, the group has turned the disco out at watering holes as varied as Henryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Cocktail Lounge, Jonesyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s at the Napa airport, Compadres Rio Grille, Bardessono, the Centre Cafe and Panchaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in Yountville. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not just in good fun, eitherâ&#x20AC;&#x201D; the idea raises awareness of a gay community in Napa along with thousands of dollars for the Napa Valley AIDS Walk. Hosted by Kellie Green from the Vine 93.3-FM, the walk features sponsored teams in Halloween costumes, raff les, balloons, horse rides and DJ Rotten Robbie. Better yet, it supports HIV services at the Queen of the Valley hospital in Napa, and it all happens on Saturday, Oct. 31, at the Lincoln Theater. 100 California Drive, Yountville. 10am. Free. 707.738.4040.

THE BOHEMIAN

6PQT<T[X]T

10.28.09-11.03.09

35


0.92;1.? :B@60 Concerts

DON’T FORGET…WE SERVE FOOD TOO!

Mc Near’s Dining House Breakfast • Lunch • Dinner BBQ • Pasta • Steak FRI 10/30 • 8:00PM DOORS • $20ADV/$25DOS • 21+ BURLESQUE/CABARET

YARD DOGS ROAD SHOW PLUS

BEATS ANTIQUE

SAT 10/31 • 8:45PM DOORS • $20 ADV/$25 DOS • 21+ DANCE/PARTY BAND

HALLOWEEN BASH WITH

PRIDE & JOY

WED 11/4 • 8:00PM DOORS • $30 ADV/$32 DOS • 18+ LATIN/HIP HOP/ROCK

OZOMATLI NATHAN MAXWELL

(OF FLOGGING MOLLY)

PATO BANTON & THE NOW GENERATION MIDNIGHT SUN

FRI 11/13 • 8:45PM DOORS • $17 • 21+ DANCE PARTY HITS

AN EVENING WITH

WONDERBREAD 5 SAT 11/14 • 8:00PM DOORS • $25 • 21+ FOLK/CELTIC ROCK

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JEREMY FISHER

THUR 11/19 • 7:30PM DOORS • $25 • 21+ ACOUSTIC/FUNK/ROCK

AN EVENING WITH

KELLER WILLIAMS FRI 11/20 & SAT 11/21 • 7:00PM DOORS • $35 • 21+ ROCK

IGHTS TWO N SAT & FRI

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SAT 11/7 • 8:00PM DOORS • $20 ADV/$22 DOS • 18+ REGGAE

PLUS

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COSTUME CONTEST WITH $500 CASH PRIZES

PLUS

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AN EVENING WITH

Y&T

FRIDAY NIGHT ONLY / MEET & GREET AFTER SHOW FRI 11/27 • 7:00PM DOORS • $25 • 21+ COUNTRY/ROCK

NEW RIDERS OF THE PURPLE SAGE SAT 11/28• 7:00PM DOORS • $20 • 21+ CD RELEASE ROOTS.BLUES

PARTY

ROY ROGERS AND THE DELTA RHYTHM KINGS

PLUS JEFFREY HALFORD AND THE HEALERS For All Ages Shows • No Children Under 10 Allowed

23 Petaluma Blvd, Petaluma

707-765-2121 www.mcnears.com

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36

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THE BOHEMIAN



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!(=>AC710H<DB82 0F0A344B The votes are in!

ast Wednesday, Oct. 21, at Hopmonk Tavern in Sebastopol, the envelopes were ripped, the gold record awards distributed, and we announced the winners of the fifth annual North Bay Music Awards. Thanks to all who came out to the Hopmonk Tavern and made it such a sweet evening, and thanks especially to the George Marsh Quartet, Arann Harris and the Greenstring Farm Band and Body or Brain (whose lead singer Jakey Lee is seen leaping up) for playing; to Noah D for keeping it live on the turntables; to Ricky Watts for doing live painting and helping raise hundreds of dollars for Face to Face and Food for Thought; to Brian GrifďŹ th and Bill Bowker from the KRSH 95.9-FM for presenting; and to the Hopmonk itself for having us back for another great year. This year, we had over 2,000 people vote in categories that were sometimes very, very close. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re lucky to have such a wealth of talent in the North Bay, and we salute everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;winners, nominees and non-nominees allâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;who continue to enrich the breeding ground of excellent music in the area. Without further ado, then . . . Blues / R&B Michael Barclay â&#x20AC;˘ BonaďŹ de Blue â&#x20AC;˘ Linda Ferro â&#x20AC;˘ SoulShine Blues Bandâ&#x20AC;˘ Volker StriďŹ&#x201A;er Winner: Volker StriďŹ&#x201A;er Country / Americana Aaran Harris and the Greenstring Farm Band â&#x20AC;˘ Poor Manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Whiskey â&#x20AC;˘ Kevin Russell â&#x20AC;˘ Stiff Dead Cat â&#x20AC;˘ Trailer Park Rangers Winner: Poor Manâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Whiskey Dance / DJ DJ Amenâ&#x20AC;˘ DJ Jacques â&#x20AC;˘ DJ Malarkey â&#x20AC;˘ DJ Noah D â&#x20AC;˘ DJ Rob Cervantes Winner: DJ Noah D Folk / Acoustic Mr. December â&#x20AC;˘ Pink Sabbath â&#x20AC;˘ Serf & James â&#x20AC;˘ Peter Tracy â&#x20AC;˘ Way-to-Go Joes Winner: Mr. December Rap / Hip-Hop Ant D.O.G. â&#x20AC;˘ At All Costs â&#x20AC;˘ Cavity â&#x20AC;˘ Latin Hyper â&#x20AC;˘ Truthlive Winner: At All Costs Jazz Jason Bodlovich â&#x20AC;˘ George Marsh â&#x20AC;˘ Stephanie Ozer â&#x20AC;˘ Jackie Ryan â&#x20AC;˘ Wesla WhitďŹ eld Winner: Jason Bodlovich Indie Rock / Punk Baby Seal Club â&#x20AC;˘ Body or Brain â&#x20AC;˘ Litany for the Whale â&#x20AC;˘ Not to Reason Why â&#x20AC;˘ Semi-Evolved Simians Winner: Baby Seal Club Rock / Metal Motogruv â&#x20AC;˘ David Nelson â&#x20AC;˘ the Pulsators â&#x20AC;˘ the Spindles â&#x20AC;˘ the Thugz Winner: The Pulsators World / Reggae Gator Beat â&#x20AC;˘ Markus James â&#x20AC;˘ Tom Rigney â&#x20AC;˘ Sol Horizon â&#x20AC;˘ Zydeco Flames Winner: Zydeco Flames See yaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll next year! Gabe Meline

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BC0A1D2:B0=3C74B8=6;468A; How Carly Simon spent her coffee break

n an attempt to regain her footing after 2008â&#x20AC;&#x2122;s ill-fated This Kind of Love, Carly Simon this week releases the informatively titled Never Been Gone, and it represents, alongside the recent dissolution of her 20-year marriage, the confessional hit makerâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s growing movement toward autonomy. One could say Simon has been looking for this all along in her personal lifeâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;but this is her business life, and Never Been Gone is out on her own familyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s record label, Iris Records. Never Been Gone shouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have come out at all. Simon had declared that This Kind of Love, which seemed to be a sureďŹ re hit on the Starbucks imprint Hear Music, would be her last album before retiring. But sales completely tanked when Starbucks suddenly decided to get out of the music business right around the albumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s release, and the jilted Simon ďŹ led a lawsuit earlier this month against Starbucks seeking $5 million to $10 million for â&#x20AC;&#x153;concealment of material factsâ&#x20AC;? and â&#x20AC;&#x153;unlawful, unfair and fraudulent business practices.â&#x20AC;? Dusting herself off, Simon retreated to her Marthaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Vineyard home and did the musicianâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s equivalent of poring over old photos after a failed relationship: she revisited her old songs. Her voice, deďŹ nitely more ragged, adds to the stark sincerity of the albumâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s mostly acoustic backing; at times, her plain phrasing even recalls Southern bluegrass singer Hazel Dickens. Album opener â&#x20AC;&#x153;The Right Thing to Doâ&#x20AC;? replaces the sweetness of the original recording with warble and venom, and the enduring kiss-off â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re So Vainâ&#x20AC;? has a deeper growl. Those who never â&#x20AC;&#x153;gotâ&#x20AC;? Carly Simon will ďŹ nd much to mock in this record, but for anyone who curled up on their bed under a poster of Leif Garrett listening to the girl in the stereo speakers sing about anticipation and betrayal, Never Been Gone is another blunt, honest journal entry to devour, tinged with regret and ďŹ&#x201A;avored by the bitter taste of terrible coffee.

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RIO NIDO ROADHOUSE BAND EVENTS

Sat Oct 31 â&#x20AC;˘ $6 â&#x20AC;˘ Halloween

DGIIN

Sat Oct 24

THE PULSATORS UPCOMING EVENTS Sat Nov 7 â&#x20AC;˘ $6

THE PULSATORS Sun Nov 8 â&#x20AC;˘ Details Coming Soon!

CHILLI COOKď&#x161;şOFF Sat Nov 14

FARGO Sun Nov 15 â&#x20AC;˘ 6-9

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All Music 6â&#x20AC;&#x201C;10pm â&#x20AC;˘ All Shows $5 unless noted

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707.967.9700 www.napaloha.com

Swimming Pool Open to Public Lunch â&#x20AC;˘ Dinner â&#x20AC;˘ Brunch on Weekends

Full Bar â&#x20AC;˘ Live Bands 707.869.0821 | 14540 Canyon 2, Rio Nido

www.rionidoroadhouse.com

THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

39


ga Blues Festival o t s i l a C

:B@60

November 7th, 1pm-7pm

Chateau Montelena Envy Winery Grant Street Vinyards Lava Vine Vinyards Tudal Winery

Tristant Vinyards Twomey Cellars Solovino Wines Silver Rose Cellars Calistoga Wine Shop

A8270A32>=34

Johnny Smith, Tia Carroll, Stan Erhart, Herb Gibson, Jimmy Smith, Susan Sutton & Levi Lloyd among many others

November 8th, 12pm-5pm Dutch Henry Winery, Envy Winery Lava Vine Vinyards, Madrigal Vinyards Siver Rose Cellars Tickets: Saturday: $25 for 16 tastings/per person (can be shared) Sunday Passport: $35/per person Weekend Pass: $50/per person For more information visit: www.calistogavisitors.com or call 707.942.6333

;>=6<4;>3H Andrew Cyrille, Oliver Lake and Reggie Workman share two decades playing together.

8]CWTXa >f]FPh Reggie Workman and Trio 3 spread jazz around the world

By Gabe Meline

8

tâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s almost midnight in Sweden, and the 72-year-old jazz legend Reggie Workman is back at his hotel after the nightâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s concertâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;with an 5am wake-up call in the morning. The two-week tour of Europe, he says over the long-distance line, has been a grueling one, with long drives and little sleep. The main benefit has been European audiences, who continue be support jazz in ways that American audiences do not. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re more knowledgeable and more open to it,â&#x20AC;? says the versatile, brilliant bassist. â&#x20AC;&#x153;In America, you have a situation where they can sell Doublemint gum and Toyota cars and everything, but theyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not trying to sell music the same way.â&#x20AC;? Workman should know. He first toured Europe as a member of John Coltraneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s group. Heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s worked with Art Blakey, Wayne Shorter, Archie Shepp, Max Roach and countless other big names in jazz. For the last 22 years, with drummer Andrew Cyrille and tenor saxophonist Oliver Lake, Workman has held down the low end for the unwavering and adventurous Trio 3, who perform Nov. 3 at two not-to-be-missed intimate shows at Flying Goat Coffee in Healdsburg. To call Trio 3 a â&#x20AC;&#x153;jazz supergroupâ&#x20AC;? would be like calling Duke Ellington a â&#x20AC;&#x153;good songwriter.â&#x20AC;? Cyrille is indisputably a giant

40

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN



of free-jazz drumming, playing for many years behind Cecil Taylor and collaborating over the years with Rahsaan Roland Kirk, Coleman Hawkins and Peter BrĂśtzmann; Lake sprung from the 1970s New York loft scene to form and tour extensively with the World Saxophone Quartet. All three men have heavy rĂŠsumĂŠs, but Trio 3â&#x20AC;&#x201D; organically founded after repeatedly calling each other to fill in on club and recording datesâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;resides decidedly in the present, the musicians still surprising each other on the bandstand and finding those moments of synchronicity and magic so common in jazz. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We are all about moving in the same direction with the music; weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve all had experience with the type of music that gives us the tools to find the matrix together, in our own way,â&#x20AC;? Workman explains, â&#x20AC;&#x153;and thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s an important part of the statement, because â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;in our own wayâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; means weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re all going to bring something different to the fold. A lot of it is just the way telepathy goes.â&#x20AC;? Workman was in his early 20s when he was asked to join Coltrane, whom heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;d known and spent time with growing up in Philadelphia. â&#x20AC;&#x153;It was a hell of an experience for me to be with somebody like him, who required what he required in his band, and to have put together the kind of band that he put together,â&#x20AC;? Workman says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Not to even mention what he was doing in music, what he was doing with his ideas about formula and sound and spirit. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not something I can just say, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;OK, this is what I learned playing with John Coltraneâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;boom.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; It was an experience. It was a lesson.â&#x20AC;? Workman can be heard at Coltraneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s turning point, from Atlantic Recordsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; OlĂŠ Coltrane to Impulse Recordsâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; Africa / Brass, and speaks of what the music required and what the music offered in the same breath. â&#x20AC;&#x153;When you get with someone who has a higher being, you know that right away. You begin to work on that particular craft, and you begin to work on that experience and gift that person is bringing to you,â&#x20AC;? he says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;I was a young boy then, and I was constantly learning what to do, what the needs were. At the same time, I had something to bring to the beach besides sand, or he wouldnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t have asked me to be part of his project!â&#x20AC;? Even when fresh from playing large theaters in Europe, Workmanâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;now a professor at New Yorkâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s New School for Jazz and Contemporary Musicâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;says he doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t necessarily mind playing smaller venues, as long as the audience connects, the feeling is right, and the evening stimulates. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The music is not embraced enough in this country so that you can have an ideal situation every time you perform,â&#x20AC;? he says. â&#x20AC;&#x153;We are constantly trying to make our own situation. We bring the music to the people, thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re about. Thatâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s what weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re out here for.â&#x20AC;? Trio 3 perform two shows on Tuesday, Nov. 3, at Flying Goat Coffee. 324 Center St., Healdsburg. 7pm and 9pm. $25. Tickets at www.healdsburgjazzfestival.org or by calling 707.433.4644.


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(Except Richard Lewis isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t miserable any more) tâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not that comic Richard Lewis isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a Halloween person, exactly. Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s more that heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a celebrity, particularly as Curb Your Enthusiasm enters its new season. â&#x20AC;&#x153;The last thing I want to do is welcome strangers to the door of my home. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Robin Hood in tights, come on in!â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? Lewis chuckles, speaking by phone from his Hollywood Hills home. But Lewis isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t the type to just turn off all of his lights that night and sit inside in the dark while trick-or-treaters patter past. Nope. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve put up a sign for the last 25 years,â&#x20AC;? he says, beginning to laugh. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not proud of this, but on Halloween, I put a huge poster on my front door that saysâ&#x20AC;?â&#x20AC;&#x201D;he laughs againâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x153;â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m caring for a man close to death.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; Itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s true!â&#x20AC;? he protests. Lewis wonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t be at home for Halloween this year, instead headlining an evening of standup comedy with Curb co-star Susie Essman at the Lincoln Theater. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll be coming,â&#x20AC;? he announces, â&#x20AC;&#x153;as a well-adjusted heterosexual.â&#x20AC;? Being â&#x20AC;&#x153;well-adjustedâ&#x20AC;? isnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t a costume for Lewis any more. Famous for his drug and alcohol abuse and diagnosed as a sex addict, Lewis cleaned himself up in 1994, even marrying some five years ago. His standup tour still focuses on his maladjusted upbringing. Being clean and sober hasnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t stopped him from being funny; if anything, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s made him more rapid-fire than ever. Lewis is of course more widely sought out than ever due to his association with Larry Davidâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s churlish comedy. The two met at summer camp when they were 12, and have had a complicated relationship ever since. Weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll just step back and let Lewis relate the last time he saw Larry: â&#x20AC;&#x153;About two months ago, I met him for dinner at some fancy place heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s chosenâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s not that itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s fancy, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s just that he likes the food. I get there first, and I give the maitre dâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; my credit card because thereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s no reason that this mogul should have to pay every time. He gets there, and of course everyone recognizes us and they donâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t even want us to order. â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;No, no, no, weâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll choose the food for you,â&#x20AC;&#x2122; and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s enough food for a thousand people, and Larryâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s phone rings and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Steve Martin and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s his poker night and Larry goes, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Oh my God, I forgot poker night. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got to go.â&#x20AC;&#x2122; So Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m stuck not only with the bill but with enough food for all of Los Angeles. It was unbelievable; it was like a house payment. So I pay it and Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m driving home, and the phone rings. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve got it on speaker phone, and itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s Larry and Steve Martin begging me to come over for poker night, and I said, â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m not coming over. Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ve already lost a thousand dollars!â&#x20AC;&#x2122;â&#x20AC;? He stops for a short breath, suddenly becoming canny. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re typing?â&#x20AC;? he asks incredulously. â&#x20AC;&#x153;Youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re not taping this? Iâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;m giving you gold, and youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;re typing?â&#x20AC;? Richard Lewis and Susie Essman appear on Saturday, Oct. 31, at the Lincoln Theater, 100 California Drive, Yountville. 8pm. $39â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$69. Post-show costume party. 707.944.1300. Gretchen Giles

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ALL SOULSâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; WEEKEND Playing with Shadows

FRIDAY r OCTOBER 30TH r 7pm Word Artist Richard Naegle & Friends Poetry, song, story, ritual and reflection. SATURDAY r OCTOBER 31ST r 9amâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;3pm Master Mask Maker Annie Hallatt Make a mask that reflects your spirit. The Episcopal Church of the Incarnation 550 Mendocino Avenue, Santa Rosa

Tickets & detailed info online:

WWW.NUMINACENTER.ORG INFO LINE 707.324.6021

$15 Fridayr$25 Saturdayr$35 for both

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â&#x20AC;&#x2DC;The Horsesâ&#x20AC;&#x2122; a hit at Alternative Theater arv is turning 75, his party guests are about to arrive, his wife, Lois, is baking his favorite cake, but all he can think about are the galloping horses he keeps hearing whenever heâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s alone in the living room. That and the vivacious younger woman who keeps appearing to insist that the sofa is a Pontiac with a very loud engine, and that Marv is actually on a cross-country road trip instead of sitting around at home, waiting to acknowledge that he has finally grown old. The Horses is written by playwright Brian Thorstenson (Over the Mountain, Shadow Crossing) the first-ever commissioned play by Marin Countyâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s innovative Alternative Theater Ensemble. The company, which presents professional productions never in theaters but always in temporary San Rafael storefronts, has earned a reputation for first-rate work done with an absence of frills. The new play is a fine example of that, a lyrically written comedy-drama-mystery-fantasy that defies categorization, alternately baffling and then charming its audience. The story, which takes place over the course of a single day, at first seems to be that of a man having memories of a long-ago affair, then unfolds a little, asking us to consider that Marv (played by the masterful Will Marchetti) may be in the early stages of dementia. The other possibility, of course, is that Marvâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s experiences are real. There are others as well, each arising gently and gracefully from the previous. Those who prefer their art to make sense will find all of this unsettling, or at least confusing, but Thorstenson is the kind of writer who seeks the truth that simmers and lurks beneath the bare facts. The Horses, with the help of a sensational cast, manages to convey profound emotion in spite of its bold avoidance of literal reality. Marchetti plays Marv with a blend of curmudgeonly irritation, youthful restlessness, childlike wonder and flat-out fear: fear of growing old, fear of losing his dreams and fear of death. As Lois, Marvâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s patient but increasingly concerned wife, Frances Lee McCain is equally good. McCain (film fans might recognize her as the mother in Gremlinsâ&#x20AC;&#x201D;â&#x20AC;&#x153;Get out if my kitchen!â&#x20AC;?) imbues Lois with her own kind of dignity. The dialogue is rich, funny and rat-a-tat. Staged as it is in an empty retail space, the set consists of little more than the couch and a few paintings. Special mention should be given to Mark Robinsonâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s excellent sound design, conjuring all of those stampeding horses as Thorstensen tells his lovely, sweet, gently off-the-wall tale. The Horses will not be everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s cup of tea, but for those with Marvâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s spirit of adventure, itâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s a great big gulp of fresh air. The Horses runs Thursdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Sunday through Nov. 15. Thursdayâ&#x20AC;&#x201C;Saturday at 8pm; Sunday at 2pm. 1609 Fourth St. (corner of Fourth and G streets), San Rafael. $15â&#x20AC;&#x201C;$25. 415.454.2787. David Templeton

M


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For customer service, email bohemian@ placepersonal.com, or call 1-617-450-8773 Women Seeking Men ATTRACTIVE, FUN ARTIST Seeking friend, late 60s-80s to do things with, like movies, concerts, opera, dinner, whatever. I am a good cook and I have a productive garden, vegetables, fruit trees etc. No smoking, maybe light drinks. 299194



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IT’S TIME Spiritual SWF, young 70s, petite, professional, employed, kids grown, ISO a fine, grounded gentleman, 65-70, for possible LTR. 240656



1949 CLASSIC SWF, tall, slender, active, enjoys swimming, bicycling, mysteries, hiking, cooking, barbecuing, symphony. Seeking well-mannered, caring S/DWM, 50-60, N/S, N/D, N/Drugs, with similar interests, for friendship and companionship. 415313



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LET’S GO OUT & HAVE FUN! Honest woman, 50s, very caring, compassionate, kind, my interests are long drives, walks, dancing, visiting new places, dinners. Seeking nice SM, 50s-60s, for LTR. 297169



EDUCATED WOMAN SWF, in her 40s, N/S, seeks gentleman, 40-50, for friendship and LTR. Let’s meet and talk! 300135



GOOD VALUES Caring, personable, compassionate, classy, hard-working female, 50s, likes music, dancing, travel, reading, museums, dining, the beach. Seeking SM, 50s, for friendship, possibly more. 309780



A BIG HEART Caring, loving SF, 39, enjoys movies, the outdoors, travel. Looking for SW/HM, 39-50, for friendship, maybe more. 305007



PETITE BLONDE Educated and attractive, downto-earth WF would like to meet someone who shares some of my interests like metal music, concerts, learning and more. If you have an open mind, I definitely want to hear from your. 3550. 314433



LET’S MEET FOR DINNER SWF, 49, 5’4’’, H/W proportionate, blondish-brown layered hair, big blue eyes, down-to-earth, mellow, nice, kind, sweet, considerate, laid-back, seeks SM, 35-55, who has a good sense of humor. I enjoy cats, beaches, hiking, camping, movies. 310278



LET’S MEET AND TALK SWF, 39, 5’3’’, loves music, dancing. Looking for a social SWM, mid 40s, for friendship first. 318133



LOOKING FOR A FRIEND SAF, 48, 5’4’’, looking for a friend who will eventually become my partner in life. 318943



TRADITIONAL VALUES SAF, 60, petite, very healthy, very active, secured, honest, sincere, hard-working, likes gardening, cooking, reading, home stuff, occasional drives to the countryside. Seeking SWM, 60-75, who’s clean-cut, N/S, N/D, with similar qualities, for friendship first, possible LTR. 313785



ADVENTUROUS WOMAN Attractive, creative, and energetic lady looking for warm-hearted, compatible seeker, 65-70, with good SOH, for dating, possible relationship. 300201



LET’S MEET FOR DINNER Caring, honest, flexible, compassionate woman, 60s, loves dancing, travel, reading, dining out. Seeking similar man, 60s, for LTR. 301189



LOOKING FOR LTR Outdoorsy, health-minded, clean-cut, honest woman in her 30s, who enjoys biking, dining, shopping, the beach, hiking, taking walks, wants to meet a male in his 30s for LTR. 309772

SHY AND ARTISTIC Single female in her 50s looking for a male who enjoys music, television. Let’s meet and see if we connect! 308997



LIKE PBS? Personable, caring, goal-oriented friendly, artistic, compassionate woman, with good values, likes coffee shops, music, reading, walks, travel, dancing, dining out and more. Looking for honest, respectful man, 50-70, for LTR. 313143



WAITING ARMS Caring, educated, honest, optimistic, hard-working SF, 30s, enjoys travel, dining out, long drives, the beach, reading, walks, hiking, music and more. Would like to meet like-minded man, 3040, for LTR. 313123



TAKE A CHANCE ON ME Motivated, outdoorsy, honest, health-conscious woman, with good values and optimistic attitude, likes most kinds of music, dining out, walks, camping, travel and relaxing time at home. Seeking a nice, honest, active man, 30-40, with similar interests, to spend time with, possible leading to LTR. 313124



MANY FINE QUALITIES Caring, outdoorsy, honest, artistic, hard-working SF, early 50s, optimistic homebody with good values, has many interests including music, dining out, museums, travel, long drives, reading, walks, camping, biking and more. Looking for an honest, down-to-earth SM, 50-70, for friendship and dating first, possibly leading to something more serious. 313126



Call costs $2.29/min. Must be 18+ ADORABLE AND BRIGHT Caring, friendly, goal-oriented, feminine, honest, compassionate woman, 60s, likes travel, exercise, music, hiking, long drives, dining out, the beach, reading and more. Seeking a great companion, 50-70, to share these activities and quiet times with. 313128



COMPASSIONATE Friendly, honest, artistic, outdoorsy, caring SF, 30s, likes watching tv, dancing, the beach, travel, walks, music, hiking, museums, dining out, more. Searching for a partner in life, 30-50, for possible LTR. 313131



OUTGOING AND FUN Compassionate, caring, friendly, honest SF, 20s, likes going to clubs, camping, hiking, reading, the beach, dining out, more. Looking for a down-to-earth, easygoing man, 22-35, for LTR. 313136



LIKE GOING OUT? Honest, goal-oriented personable, artistic, sophisticated, hardworking SF would like to meet a SM, 40-60, who enjoys travel, walks, the beach, music, reading, camping, long drives, museums, tv, dining out, dancing and more. Seeking LTR. 313138



SEEKING LTR Honest, compassionate, artistic, friendly, goal-oriented, caring SF, 50s, health-minded with good values, into music, the beach, dancing, tv, travel, museums, walks, reading and more. Would like to meet SM, around the same age, for companionship. 313139



HONESTY A MUST Hard-working, honest, optimistic, nurturing, flexible, motivated SF, 50s, likes biking, the beach, travel, dancing, hiking, reading, music, seeks similar man, 50s, who is ready for LTR. 301198

OPTIMISTIC Friendly, ambitious, adaptable, outdoorsy, personable female, 50s, enjoys museums, dining, travel, coffee shops, the beach, taking walks. Seeking SM, 60s, for friendship and casual dating. 299370

CAPTIVATING Sophisticated, outdoorsy, friendly, mischievous SF, 50s, likes hiking, kayaking, taking walks. In search of SM, 50-70, for LTR. 301203

FRIENDS OR MORE Nurturing, artistic, bright, hardworking, compassionate, feminine female in her 50s, enjoys music, dancing, travel, the beach, kayaking, dining, taking walks. Seeking male, 50-69, for friendship with the possibility of more. 309768





GOOD VALUES Shy, friendly, caring, compassionate SF, 60s, nurturing, motivated, enjoys walks, the beach, coffee shops, biking, dining, seeks similar man, 60+, for friendship leading to LTR. 301544



PERSONABLE Compassionate, bright, friendly female, 40s, likes music, dancing, dining, biking, coffee shops. Seeking similar male, 50s, for LTR. 302304



OUTDOORSY Bright, compassionate, honest, friendly, adaptable woman, 50s, seeks SM, 40-60, who enjoys dining, dancing, beaches, taking walks, for casual dating or LTR. 301192



CARING AND COMPASSIONATE Friendly, adaptable, outdoorsy, caring, healthy SF, 40s, likes dancing, travel, dining, hiking, the beach. Seeking SM, 30-50, for casual dating possibly leading to LTR. 299368



Singles Parties





ONE HONEST WOMAN LEFT Bright SF, 60s, with good values, flexible and honest, likes reading, camping, travel, taking walks. Seeking similar male, 50-69, for friendship, casual relationship, possible LTR. 309769



VERY PERSONABLE Motivated, bright, artistic, hardworking, health-conscious female, 50s, personable and flexible, seeks male, age open, who likes museums, travel, long drives, camping, hiking. 309770



Men Seeking Women HANDSOME BM... 65, seeks female for fun-loving adventures and relaxation. I love cooking, surprises, and giving gifts. 302811



ADULTS OF ALL AGES WELCOME!



CAPTIVATING! Adorable, hard-working, classy female, 50s, enjoys museums, shopping, travel, coffee shops, the beach. Seeking SM, 50s, for friendship, casual relationship, or LTR. 309776 A CARING HEART Outdoorsy, flexible, nurturing, feminine woman, 50s, likes camping, long drives, travel, coffee shops, taking walks. Seeking male, 40-59, for LTR. 309777





WOMAN WITH GOOD VALUES Friendly, caring, honest, compassionate, classy lady, 20s, wants to meet a man in his 20s for camping, shopping, travel, dining, long drives and walks, and more! Friendship possibly leading to more. 299374





HAPPILY EVER AFTER Single white male, 46, 5’11’’, 190lbs, brown hair, blue eyes, Aquarius, interested in music, film, literature. Seeking the real deal, the storybook, the fairy tale princess. 323596



LONG HAIR A PLUS Good-looking Native American male, 5’8”, 220lbs, long hair, in search of a Hispanic or Native American woman, 50s, for friendship first and companionship. 304173



SEEKING AN OPEN MIND SBM, 33, 250lbs, smoker, enjoys cars, long walks, working out. Looking for SF, 20-65, kids ok, for possible relationship. 304990



PACIFIC NORTHWEST Casual guy, enjoys mountain and beach trips, walks, outdoors, moonlit nights, cuddling. Seeking SWF, 40-56, slim/medium build, to come spend quiet times in Pacific Northwest. 954499



SHARED JOY SWM, 59, 5’9”, 160lbs, nicelooking, with good SOH, seeking woman to have fun with, race/ age unimportant. I like dancing, partying, shows and dining out. Call me! 972627



LET’S MEET FOR COFFEE Single white male, 76, 5’6’’, funloving family man, likes camping, boating, etc. Looking for a similar woman, 68-73. No drugs. 323442



COLLEGE PROF-SUMMERS OFF! Tall, dark, handsome, positive, athletic SM, 60, 6’, 200lbs, looks 45, feels 35, loves life! A seafood vegetarian, non-smoker and light drinker. Loves the outdoors, hiking, walking, mountain biking, tennis, acoustic music, volunteer work, walks on the beach, traveling, long road trips, cuddling, spending time with someone special. 322787





LOOKING FOR LTR Friendly, feminine, nurturing, captivating, bright, personable woman in her 50s who enjoys night clubs, television, dining, dancing, surfing, music, seeks similar male, 40-60, for LTR. 301191

LTR AND LOVE IN BOOTS Italian Taurus, SM, 45, 6’, 218lbs, N/S, N/Drugs, N/D, long hair, educated, published, financially/ emotionally secure, respectful, inspiring, tender, great sense of humor, enjoys alternative music, dancing, movies, animals, cooking, conversation, mountains. Seeking thin, dancing SWF, 1833, in boots for LTR. 315052

Halloween Costume Party & Dance Saturday, Oct 31, 8-12am, Graziano’s 170 Petaluma Blvd, Petaluma

Sausalito Waterfront Mixer Tuesday, Nov 3, 7-9pm, The Spinnaker 100 Spinaker Drive, Sausalito

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I’M NOT THE GUY... ...for long walks on the beach, dancing the night away. Retiree, 48, moderately disabled with MS, SSU grad, into jazz, films, progressive talk radio. San Francisco native seeks caring, happy lady, 40-50, for companionship. N/S. I’m a good listener, talk to me. Tell me about yourself. 219612



SEEKING A REAL WOMAN WM, 6’, 200lbs, blond/blue, a few tattoos, very athletic, loves the beach, bike rides, romantic evenings at home, great conversation. Seeking honest woman, 18-50, no games. 322539



SPECIAL WOMAN SM, 48, black hair, brown eyes, very outgoing, great personality, likes photography, basketball, music, travel. I’m looking for a woman who’s interested in dating and possibly more. 287933



FRIEND LOVER SOULMATE SWPJM, 56, 5’10”, blue eyes, sandy brown hair, kind, passionate, artistic, sincere, committed and fun, enjoys ocean walks, travel, arts, food, wine and nature. Seeking SF, 50-62, kindred spirit, kind, soft, sensuous, for life’s adventures together. 309779



GET TO KOW ME SBM, 53, 6’1”, 190lbs, looking for a fun, loving woman, 25-65, with a good personality, who likes having a good time, the beach, horseback riding, movies, walks and more. 314332



HOPE TO FIND YOU Sociable, good-hearted, compassionate, healthy gentleman, 63, published writer/poet, D/D-free, non-drinker, enjoys quiet times, home, sports, simple times. Seeking loving, happy, intelligent woman to share life, love, possible LTR. Bay Area preferred. 224839



LOOK NO FURTHER SWM, 30, 5’4’’, looking for a woman, 30-40, who wants to hang out and get to know each other. 317907



COOKING FOR YOU! SWM, 62, 5’10”, 170lbs, N/S, light drinker, clean shaven, hazel eyes, self-employed, loves cooking, jazz and traveling. Seeking a similar woman, 50-80, race unimportant, for possible LTR. 318883



ONE GOOD MAN LEFT SHM, 32, N/S, likes soccer, running. In search of SA/BF for friendship first possibly leading to more. 319059



JUST MOVED HERE SWM, 5’7’’, 190lbs, brown eyes, wants to meet soulmate in similar SF, 30-55. I love swing dancing, travel, gourmet cooking, animals, nature. 305800



SOMEONE LIKE ME SWM, youthful 51, 5’11’’, 200lbs, dark hair, hazel eyes, looking for a lady, 40-59, who likes to party, is outgoing, adventurous. 319319



EASY ON THE EYES Outgoing, good-looking WM, 6’, 175lbs, salt-n-pepper/blue, good sense of humor, spontaneous, romantic, adventurous, likes weekend getaways, concerts and more. Seeking honest, appreciative woman, 22-65, who has goals in life. 320839



JACK OF HEARTS Handsome dude, 57, good SOH, interesting, spontaneous, fun, adventuresome, looking for attractive woman. I enjoy dancing, concerts, dining out, hiking, beach combing and holding hands also loves animals, dogs, cats and horses. Happy trails! 201639



WELL-TRAVELED WRITER Sensitive, compassionate, honest WM, warm, open, considered attractive, wonderful listener, quiet entertaining, likes most kinds of movies, music, travel, more. Seeking WF, 52-71, for possible relationship. 323098



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Men Seeking Women PERSONABLE Shy SM, 50s, with good values, likes long drives, hiking, walking, travel, dining out. Looking for similar female, 40-60, ready for LTR. 301538



LOVES HORSES Healthy senior WM, 165lbs, N/S, loves animals, especially horses, theater, PBS. Seeking slender female for romance. 302170



ARE YOU THE ONE? Bright, artistic, caring, flexible, adorable guy, 50s, likes music, dancing, travel, the beach, dining out. Looking for similar female. 302306



LET’S HAVE FUN! SHM, 34, N/S, no children, looking for a SH/WF, 24-32, for dating, possibly more. 302392



FUN, INTROSPECTIVE SWM, 52, 6’4’’, in good shape, likes classic movies, reading, hiking, classical music, sailing, the outdoors, travel, the symphony. Looking for SF, 22-50, similar interests. 301801



STARTING OVER Separated WM, loves hockey, the outdoors, golf, staying in and watching movies, gardening and more. Would like to meet someone fun who wants to enjoy life. Call me and lift my spirits. 282029



GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR SWM, 59, 5’11’’, 180lbs, nonsmoker, blue eyes, sandy brown hair, enjoys fishing, beaches, dining out and more. Seeking female, 55-65, for possible relationship. 309857



LOOKING FOR LTR SM, 31, outdoorsy, honest, compassionate, seeks SF, 22-35, who enjoys travel, television, camping, taking walks, the beach and more. 301200



LTR AND LOVE IN BOOTS Italian Taurus, SM, 45, 6’, 218lbs, N/S, N/Drugs, N/D, long hair, educated, published, financially/ emotionally secure, respectful, inspiring, tender, great sense of humor, enjoys alternative music, dancing, movies, animals, cooking, conversation, mountains. Seeking thin, dancing SWF, 1833, in boots for LTR. 315055



THOUGHTFUL, ROMANTIC Warm, sweet, affectionate, handicapped guy, loves humor, cuddling. Sweet-hearted, genuinely nice guy with fun attitude, easy-going, creative, silly, great sense of humor, very goofy at times, animal-lover, loves movies, music, museums and travel. Seeking female to share all my interests with. 315225



LET’S MEET FOR COFFEE SM, 20s, bright, artistic, ambitious, optimistic, personable, likes dining, travel, the beach, walking, exercise. Seeking female, 20s, for possible relationship. 318319



COMPASSIONATE SM, 60s, with good values, likes camping, dancing, dining, reading, hiking, walking, biking. Looking for SF, 50s, for LTR. 318320



SOPHISTICATED Caring, compassionate, hardworking, goal-oriented, artistic SM, 40s, likes camping, dancing, travel. Searching for similar male, 30s, for LTR. 301536

SOMETIMES MISCHIEVOUS Optimistic, honest, clean-cut, caring, outdoorsy man, 50s, likes music, walks, long drives, running, watching tv, museums, dining out. Seeking SF, 50s, for companionship. 313135



FRIENDSHIP FIRST Caring, honest, nurturing SM, 60s, enjoys music, watching tv, walks, camping, coffee shops, hiking and museums. Looking for SF, 30-70, for dating possibly leading to LTR. 313144





READY FOR LTR Shy, friendly, caring, clean-cut, classy SM, 50s, enjoys music, camping, travel, long drives, hiking, beaches, seeks similar woman, 30-50, for LTR. 302300



LOOKING FOR LTR Hard-working, healthy, personable, honest, compassionate man, 40s, likes camping, travel, hiking, long drives, beaches. In search of similar female, 30s, for friendship leading to LTR. 302302





LET’S TALK! SWM, mid 30s, looking for discreet guys in the Larkfield area for friendship and fun. Call me! 300359



CALL ME BiWM, handyman artist in Marin, 52, 5’6”, 180lbs, dirty blond hair, pale blue eyes, seeks couple or singles for fun in Marin or nearby. 293610



Men Seeking Men LOOKING FOR LOVE Seeking one man to love and care for completely and forever. Me: SBM, 50ish, affectionate, supportive, genuine, lots to offer. You: just be yourself, imperfect, mature older man, 70-90, with some humor, some laughter. Are you the one? 299175



COMPASSIONATE GUY Hard-working, classy, clean-cut, caring, honest male in search of a male, 58-69, who likes night clubs, television, travel, dancing, the beach, taking walks, exercise. 308996





LOOKING FOR A SF WHO... is independent, confident and takes care of herself. I like good movies, dressing up for a nice dinner out, skiing, bike rides, hiking, scuba diving, swing dancing, cooking. I’m an honest person who doesn’t believe in playing games. 301540

FREAKY MAN... looking for a freaky, spontaneous, wild, erotic woman, 18-55, to get together and have some fun, adult times together. 322361

Women Seeking Women WHERE ARE YOU? You are 35-45, very feminine, dark, mystical, spiritual, with a sense of humor, know what you like, and want to enjoy life, but not alone. I’m trying to find you, where are you? 310085



LOOKING FOR YOU SWF, 41, Santa Rosa area, looking for a SWF, 30-45, to hang out and have fun with. 318644



NATURE LOVER Health-conscious, honest, wise, spiritual, artistic, friendly female, 50s, enjoys philosophy, psychology, walking, reading, the beach. Searching for similar female, 50s, for long-term relationship. 302296



Alternative Lifestyles SANTA ROSA AREA WM, 41, looking for open-minded people who enjoy adult fun. I like adult movies, toys and looking for a couples and females. I can be orally bi depending on the chemistry. 323130



JOIN US Bi couple looking for a stud, a muffin or both. Satisfaction guaranteed. 323336



STRAIGHTFORWARD FUN SWM, 39, looking for SF, 18-50, who likes to try new things and isn’t afraid of having a little fun! 304707



JOIN US White couple looking for a female, 18-25, for fun, discreet times together. Give us a call. 311573



READY FOR FUN? SWM, 30, feminine bottom, looking for a top WM, 20-60, for good times and fun. Let’s see where it goes! 311892



SPANK YOU VERY MUCH Woman, thou shalt be spanked. Gentle or hard, clothed or naked, whatever you deserve, by a sexy man who knows how to do it. 288495



SHE-MALE SEEKS GOOD TIMES Want to spend time with a man or a woman. I am very affectionate, beautiful, and love to be held. Interested? 279657



KEEP IT DISCREET WF, 30s, dark/dark, light complexion, fun-loving, bi-curious, seeks discreet female, 28-55, to have fun and party with. 314779



WHATEVER YOU DECIDE! SM, 5’11’’, 170lbs, light brown hair, blue eyes, athletic build, shaved, smooth and sexy, wellendowed, into a wide variety of pleasures. Anything goes; role play, fantasy fulfillment, toys, porn, lingerie. Seeking couples and females to party and play. 316161



COUPLE SEEKS WOMAN Very attractive, middle-aged, married white couple, she’s 5’2”, 125lbs, 34D. He is 5’11”, 172lbs. Both and very sensual and she is multi-orgasmic. We are N/S, light drinkers, heal-conscious, pleasant, non-pushy. Please be N/S, H/W proportionate, white, Hispanic or Asian, under 55. Bi or bi-curious ok. Discretion assured. Let’s have fun. 314002



TURN THE TABLES Handsome, sane, married WM, 57 is looking for a woman, who knows how to use a strap on, for ongoing, mostly daytime play. I will please you in any way that you want and I take directions well. 318288



GREAT LEGS! Tall, slender cross-dresser, very nice legs, looking for men or a group of men. Give me a call, let’s have some fun! 318996



BD/SM SWM, submissive, wants one or two females or young male for BD/SM, watersports, torture, anal. Never did any of this before, but curious to try now! 319455



SEEKING COUPLES Good-looking bi male, 50, would like to meet bi man/woman couples for erotic interlude. 319986



TRIPLE PLAY Handsome, easygoing, discreet, polite gentleman, 57, enjoys couples. I am a WM, 6’, 190lbs, athletic build, well hung and Bi. I also like dominant women. 232423



LET’S HAVE SOME FUN Male looking for an older gentleman, 35-65, to teach me the ropes. I haven’t been with too many people. I like watching adult movies and trying new things. 321782

866.689.5312



I NEED HELP! Married HM, 49, 5’11”, goodlooking, doesn’t get it at home. Looking for a wild woman with a high libido for a discreet sexual encounter. 322196

18+



Get ready to meet someone special.

Missed Connections AMAZON KINDLE Hello, I met you Friday June 27 at the Russian River Brewing Company on Fourth St. in Santa Rosa. She may be a computer programmer from St. Helena Hospital and watched on this day 3 movies back to back in the theater on Fourth St. in the town of Santa Rosa The Love Guru by Mike Meyers, Wall-E and another film. And she sipped a little beer and read from her Amazon kindle. I would like to get in touch with this girl and ask her to edit my book. She is a perfect candidate for my book. Hope to hear from you. Phil. 274972



CORINA IN OLIVER’S Saturday at 4:00PM, You had 15-year-old twins with blacks belts in karate. I have two cute little kids. We talked about children and kale. Lunch? 311695



call 1.800.214.3435

The Bohemian is no longer servicing walk-in ads. Please call 1-800-214-3435 to become a member.

Dial 1.900.287.1222 or 1.800.273.8235

(with credit card or check)

Only $2.19 per minute • 18 and up • Or call toll-free 1.800.214.3435 to become a member.

THE BOHEMIAN

1022

10.28.09-11.03.09

47


BOHEMIANCLASSIFIEDS Placing an Ad

Classified Index ❶ Employment

❹ Professional Services

❸ Computer Market

➏ Real

❷ For Sale

➎ Music Scene

Estate Services

g Business Opportunities

g Employment Jobs

$$$HELP WANTED$$$

Attention Readers Some ads in this section may require an initial investment or fee. Metro Newspapers encourages you to thoroughly investigate any advertiser’s claims before sending payment.

Extra Income! Assembling CD cases from Home! No Experience Necessary! Call our Live Operators Now! 1-800-4057619 EXT 2450 www.easywork-greatpay.com www.easywork-greatpay.com (AAN CAN)

❼ Home Services

§ By Phone Call the Department at 707.527.1200 Mon.-Fri., 8:30a.m.5:30p.m. √ By Fax Fax your ad to the Classified Department at 707.527.1288

Hand Blown Glass Art Makes a Great Gift Made by Local artists, One of a kind glass art pieces at incredible prices. Only at Tama Rama’s in Downtown Cotati. 8252 Old Redwood Hwy, Cotati (707) 795-1425

Quality Workmanship, Friendly Service, and Dependability You Can Trust. Insured with Local references Repairs, Custom Builds, and Troubleshooting Call today and get the job DONE! 707-794-7955 www.goebelbuilders.com

Santa Rosa Plumbing

g g For Sale

Computer Market MacAdvantage Macintosh

Miscellaneous

FREE Diagnosis, Friendly In-House Staff Hardware/ stuff4every1.com Career Development Software, DATA Recovery, Unique gifts. Toys, latest baby Internet, Email,Wireless Earn $75-$200 Hour products, hunting clothes & Network Setup & Security, Media Makeup Artist Training. accessories, fun kids furniApple Authorized Business Ads, TV, film, fashion. One ture, swimwear, boss’gifts, Agent, Tam Nguyen-Chief week class. Stable job in and much much more. Tech, M-F 10-6 weak economy. Details at info@themacadvantage.com www.AwardMadeUpSchool.co 707.664.0400 m 310/364-0665. (AAN CAN)

Professional Services Goebel Builders Jay Goebel, General Contractor, Lic. #812957

Water Conservation Experts. Friendly, Honest Service. Licensed, Bonded and Insured. License #871026.

Tankless water heaters, high efficiency toilets, recirculation, general plumbing needs 707.528.8228

Green Earth Catering Organic and Earth friendly foods and supplies Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager. 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell redgore23@aol.com

Contacting Us

∏ In Person Visit our office Monday through Friday, 8:30a.m. to 5:30p.m. at 847 5th Street, Santa Rosa ≈ Deadline Fridays, 2:00pm

it All; from Website to Notice Powerful Staff Motivation. Ask All real estate advertised in About Our Stimulus Package. the Bohemian Newspaper is subject to the State and FedGolden Star Grafix eral Fair Housing Act, which Need a quality designer? makes it illegal to advertise Business cards, brochures, any preference, limitation, or flyers, posters, digital collage, discrimination based on race, cd covers, photographic color, religion, sex, handicap, restoration, general family status (the presence of marketing materials. children), or national origin, Mark Schaumann or the intention to make any 707-795-0924, such preference, limitation, or schaumann1@earthlink.net discrimination. State and locate laws forbid discriminaJoe Louvar tion in the sale, rental, or Productions advertising of real estate. We 707.479.0050 QUALITY LIVE will not knowingly accept any AUDIO RECORDING advertising for real estate which is in violation of the Photography law. All persons are hereby by Paul Burke informed that all dwellings 707.664.0178 advertised are available on boomburke@hotmail.com an equal opportunity basis to the best of our knowledge.

g Music Scene

g Homes

ALL AREAS HOUSES FOR RENT

Browse thousands of rental listings with photos and Lil Wayne, E-40, maps. Advertise your rental Exploring The Human Element Snoop Dog, San Quinn home for FREE! Visit: in Business. Call us for a Thug World Records explosive www.RealRentals.com FREE, expert consultation @ label features lil Wayne (AAN CAN) Class: 707.483.5135. Our Team Does Snoop dog E-40 G-unit and Rent or Lease more. Free Downloads, MP3s, RingTones, videos. www.thugworldrecords.com 408-561-1255

Euro Business Solutions

Bands

g Home Services

Q UALITY G RAPHIC D ESIGN BUSINESS CARDS • BROCHURES POSTERS • T-SHIRTS • CD COVERS FLYERS • PHOTOGRAPHIC RESTORATION

general marketing materials

Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924

schaumann1@earthlink.net

48

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN

g Real Estate Rentals Shared Housing

ALL AREAS - RENTMATES.COM Browse hundreds of online listings with photos and maps. Find your roommate with a click of the mouse! Visit: www.Rentmates.com. (AAN CAN)

Carpentry

Custom Cabinetry by Expert Craftsman With 30 years of experience; classical training in London and Milan; and expertise in a variety of styles, I out perform my clients` expectations. Incorporating sustainable forested materials with exotic hardwoods, fine veneers, inlay carving and custom molding. From design to installation, my work is guaranteed. Call for a free initial consultation. Philip Bertelli Woodwork 707-280-5732.

Bohemian Classifieds 847 5th Street Santa Rosa, CA 95404 Monday through Friday, 8:30a.m. to 5:30p.m.

ph: 707.527.1200 fax: 707.527.1288

gg Contractors

Notice To Readers California law requires that contractors taking jobs that total $500 or more (labor or materials) be licensed by the Contractors State License Board. State law also re quires that contractors include their license number on all advertising. You can check the status of your licensed contractor at www.cslb.ca.gov or 1-800-321-CSLB (2752). Unlicensed contractors taking jobs that total less than $500 must state in their advertise ments that they are not licensed by the Contractors State License Board.

Legal & Public Notices

NOTICE OF PUBLIC SALE OF ABANDONED PROPERTY

Notice is hereby given that the undersigned will sell at public auction pursuant to Section 1988 of the Civil Code of the Sate of California; the following personal property to-wit identified by the tenant name and storage unit number/description. ESTELLE L. SOTOMAYOR 3455 SANTA ROSA AVE #44, SANTA ROSA CA 95407 GREETREE FINANCIAL SERVICING CORP C/O VANDERBILT MORTGAGE & FINANCE INC P.O. BOX 9800, MARYVILLE, TN 37802 1985 SKYLINE/BAY SPRINGS Painting DECAL # LAI6108 SERIAL # 33700300V LABEL # 318960 CUSTOM PAINTING This sale will be by competiAll The Best For Your Home!! tive bidding on the 17TH day Interior & Exterior Custom of NOVEMBER , 2009, at Painting & Staining10:00 am on the premises Cabinet refinishing, wall where said property is stored paper stripping, drywall and which is located at, 3455 patching, cedar siding, epoxy SANTA ROSA AVE #44, SANTA ROSA, CA 95407. Purchases garage floors, pressure washing, decks.Owner on all must be made with cash and paid for at the time of purjobs. Licensed, Bonded, chase. This sale is subject to Insured, Local References. cancellation in the event of CSLB#888479. Call Cotterill settlement between landlord Custom Painting: 707-528-6832/707-396-6402 and obligated party.

g

gg Classes & Instruction

High School Diploma! Fast, affordable and accredited. Free brochure. Call Now!. 1-888-532-6546 ext. 97 www.continentalacademy.com (AAN CAN)

Youth Failing School or School Failing Our Youth ? Try Rancho Bodega School Small Group/One on One Instruction - Enriched Middle/High School Curriculum - Special Studies/Independent Study - Emphasizing Music & Art Serving Grades 7-12 NOW ENROLLING !! Call 707-795-7166 www.ranchobodegaschool. com.

Miscellaneous

Gain National Exposure Reach over 5 million young, active, educated readers for only $995 by advertising in 110 weekly newspapers like this one. Call Jason at 202/289-8484. (AAN CAN)

g g Weight & Eating

The Raw Express

Raw Food Delivery Service. Living, organic, vegan and fresh! Only $100 week! www.PJsRawCuisine.com 831-444-5565 Miscellaneous

Penis Enlargement FDA Medical Vacuum Pumps. Gain 1-3 inches permanently. Testosterone, Viagra, Cialis. Free brochures. 619/294-7777 www.drjoelkaplan.com (discounts available) (AAN CAN)


HEALTH&WELL-BEING g Counceling & Therapy

PSYCHOTHERAPY FOR MEDITATORS/YOGIS

g

Meditation & compassion class for those in psychotherapy. Robert Leverant, MFT MFC 27918. 707-823-0818. Healing & Bodywork

Relaxing Massage

First time $45/hr. www.garywtmassage.com, Gary, CMT. 707-235-5423

Relaxing massage and bodywork by male massage therapist with 10 yrs experience. 707-542-6856

RELAX Asian Massage Thai • Deep Tissue Swedish • Hot Stone 1 HR/$65 90 MIN/$100 walk-ins or appt

707.528.2540 3401 Cleveland Ave #2 Santa Rosa

Massage

Golden Flower Massage Spa

by Ron,

CMT ›JXk`]jp`e^=lcc9f[p ›Jn\[`j_&;\\gK`jjl\ ›JkXik`e^Xk$+,&_i ›Gi`mXk\Jkl[`f

QuietMassage.com Santa Rosa 8 am – 8 p m

g (.'. ,*-$((*-

Massage $55 hr

• Deep Tissue/Swedish • Sports • Shiatzu • Back Walking • Foot Reflexology • Chair $10/10 min massage

Happy Health Spa open 10-10, 7 days 525 Ross St, Santa Rosa

707-591-8899

Open 7 Days: 10am-10pm

1626 4th St. Santa Rosa 707.526.6888

Schedule Online

Grand Opening!

Massage • Reflexology Swedish/Shiatsu

30 yrs experience. Excellent Rates! 1/2 hour, hour or 90 mins. Colin, CMT 707-823-2990.

4 Men

Massage & Relaxation

Guerneville M4M Massage Mitch, CMT. Mature. Professional. Relaxing intuitive touch. Private discrete studio. 707-849-7409

Deep Relaxing Full Body Massage To total Completion by a mature male $40/hour. Napa Valley location. Roger 707-525-1771.

SEBASTOPOL MASSAGE FOR GUYS

• Swedish & Deep

Tissue Massage • Hot Stone Massage

699 Petaluma Blvd. N

707.765.1879 Open 7 days 9am-10pm

A Safe Place To Be Real Holistic tantric masseuse. Unhurried, private, heartfelt. Monday thru Saturday. NEW CLIENT DISCOUNT. 707-793-2232.

Guerneville M4M Massage Mitch, CMT. Mature. Professional. Relaxing intuitive touch. Private discrete studio. 707-849-7409

Deep Relaxing Full Body Massage

To total Completion by a Full-body DEEP pain-relieving mature male $40/hour. massage & exquisite pamper- Napa Valley location. Roger 707-525-1771. ing. Call 707-824-8700 or google search “James Dickson SEBASTOPOL Calendar” for pics MASSAGE FOR GUYS & availability. Full-body DEEP pain-relieving massage & exquisite pamper-

Windsor: 4 Men

ing. Call 707-824-8700 or google search “James Dickson Calendar” for pics & availability.

Full Body Sensual Massage

RELAX!

Strong Thorough and Intuitive

Lily Spa

FLOWER SPA

With a mature, playful CMT. Comfortable incall location near the J.C. in Santa Rosa. Soothing, relaxing, and fun. Visa/MC accepted. Gretchen 707/478-3952.

Therapeutic Massage

Best Massage Swedish, sports, deep tissue. Located in Santa Rosa. $75./hr out-call $50./hr. in-call CMT-Debbie 776-4732

• improves mobility in neck and shoulders

A Provider of Pleasure

• balances energy

In a safe, relaxing, comfortable space by a “mature”, compatible, easy-going gentleman! Since 1991 I`ve provided pleasure to women, men, couples. Good virtues. NW Santa Rosa, Jimmy, (C) 707-799-4467 or (L) 707-527-9497.

Cindy Cross, CMT Need a relaxing massage? Come in for Swedish, Deep Tissue, Tui Na, Reiki, Lifestream, Acupressure and see what a difference it can make. Call 707.665.9020. First Time Client Special! 90 minutes for $60. Cindy Cross, C.M.T. 665-9020 By appointment only

g Psychics

Psychic Palm and Card Reader

Man of Your Dreams

Health & Well Being Today!

By Joe, CMT. Relaxing hot tub and pool available. Will do outcalls. 707-228-6883.

Open 7 days 9-10pm

Foot Massage $19.99/45 min 2460 Mendocino Ave., Santa Rosa

707.578.3088

Grand Opening

HEAVENLY TOUCH Beautiful Asian Massage

Margery Smith 707.578.9642

n

Health - Relaxation - Stress Relief - Experienced CMT

$50/hour $35/half hour New Customers 15 minutes FREE

n

11am-9pm 161B Kentucky St, Petaluma 707.778.7888 • 626.627.8028

Chinese Medicine & Massage Therapy Center FREE CONSULTATION with a Chinese medicine expert & Qi Gong Master. Treatment for pain & injury. Extensive traditional Chinese herbal pharmacy

Madame Lisa. Truly gifted adviser for all problems. 827 Santa Rosa Ave. Call for Appointment 707-542-9898

Call 707.527.1200

Great Massage

Therapeutic Massage Center Boody Massage $55/hr

Indian Head Massage • relief from tension headaches, eyestrain, and sinusitis

John, Santa Rosa. Introductory massage $50/hour, www.completebodybalance. com 707-536-1516.

Brent, C.M.T. 26 years experience. Nurturing, intuitive touch. Private, discrete studio. 707/477-0400.

Men, women, couples. TLC, massage, Tantra, nurturing mutual touch. William 707-548-2187

NOW OPEN

Ayurvedic

Advertise in the

MORE THAN 15 MASSAGE TECHNIQUES FOR PERFECT RELAXATION Swedish, Deep Tissue, Acupressure, Reflexology Qi Gong • Thai Chi • Acupuncture Cupping herbs • Infrared Sauna • Same-day Appointments Walk-ins Welcome • Treatments Start at $20 - Insurance Accepted Gift Certificates • Open 7 days, 10 AM to 8 PM

707.762.9111 • 172 Keller Street, Petaluma THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

49


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50

10.28.09-11.03.09

THE BOHEMIAN

off

35 years training experience

Doggie Boot Camp or

3 private sessions for $200 (reg $240)

Guest on the Discovery Channel’s K-9 Cops for his expertise Obedience training the natural way

exp. 11/30/09

10 acres of safe, country training grounds Exceptional for aggression issues

Low Cost Vaccination Clinics every Sunday, 9:30-11am

Strong leadership skills taught for owners

707-322-3272 www.incrediblecanine.com

WESTERN FARM CENTER 707.545.0721 21 West 7th St. Santa Rosa

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Place your pet related ad here today! Call 707.527.1200

Meet Lizzy • Kitty of the Week

Meet Patches • Dog of the Week

They just woke me up from a lovely nap on my lovely pink bed so don't misinterpret that look! I love to have the top of my head stroked and really zone out on the grooming thing – and since I'm so small I can fit right in your lap. To learn more about adopting Lizzy or many other homeless animals at the Sonoma Humane Society, please visit us at 5345 Hwy 12 West, Santa Rosa (@ Llano Rd), open everyday from 12-6pm, or check us out online at www.SonomaHumane.org

A Dalmation/Pit Bull mix, you say? Where'd my spots go? When I see myself in the mirror I think I might have been the RCA Victor dog in a previous life! I love walks with anyone and everyone but don't try and put me on a schedule. To learn more about adopting Patches or many other homeless animals at the Sonoma Humane Society, please visit us at 5345 Hwy 12 West, Santa Rosa (@ Llano Rd), open everyday from 12-6pm, or check us out online at www.SonomaHumane.org

The Adoption Center is open 7 days a week from 12PM - 6PM and is located at 5345 Highway 12 West, Santa Rosa (just 5 miles west of Hwy 101 @ Llano Rd) www.sonomahumane.org

The Adoption Center is open 7 days a week from 12PM - 6PM and is located at 5345 Highway 12 West, Santa Rosa (just 5 miles west of Hwy 101 @ Llano Rd) www.sonomahumane.org


BOHEMIAN FLIPSIDE

To place your ad call 707.527.1200

SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM

1901 CLEVELAND AVE SUITE B SANTA ROSA 707.576.0818 www.srtp.net

We provide treatment for: Oxycontin, Vicodin and Heroin utilizing replacement medications. We also treat Methamphetamine and other stimulant dependence. s 3UBUTEX3UBOXONE AVAILABLE s 0ROVIDING 4REATMENT SINCE  s #ONFIDENTIALITY ASSUREd

Heal Back Pain with Silver Cloud

WHERE IS MY HAPPINESS? Find out! Learn the Release Technique. 1st Time Live Class in Sonoma County. Nov. 13,14,& 15. As taught nationwide since 1976. www. Releasetechnique.com. Call Richard 707-874-1155.

Rocks and Clouds Zendo Meditation and Dharma Talk

Unplugging the Christmas Machine (Workshop) Reduce stress and increase holiday enjoyment by making simple changes in the celebration of Christmas. Examine your current practices, define your values, create a fantasy Christmas, and then create a workable plan for the coming holiday season. Cost: $20. Sat Nov 7, 9:30a - 3p, Journey Center, Santa Rosa, 707-578-2121, www.journeycenter.org

Wednesday nights, 7:00 p.m. 618 South Main Street, Sebastopol. www.rocksandclouds.org 707/824-5647.

SPIRITUAL CONNECTIONS Finding inspiration and connecting with your community

The Journey Center: Christ-centered Spirituality, Healing, & Wholeness Reading room, art gallery, prayer/ meditation gatherings, spiritual journey resources, bodywork, bookstore, free WiFi. 1601 Fourth Street, Santa Rosa. www.journeycenter.org 707.578.2121

6th Annual JCC Meditation Retreat Bittul haYesh: Uncovering the Authentic Self. ALL WELCOME in spiritual practices of meditation, sacred Hebrew chant, mystical storytelling, yoga, nature, more. Dec 4-6, Petaluma. www.jccsoco.org/meditation or call (707) 528-4222 x 330

Santa Rosa Shambhala Meditation Center Free instruction and practice opportunities Tuesday 4:30-5:30 PM, Wednesday 7 PM, Sunday 10 AM - 11:15 AM. www.santarosa.shambhala.org Mahakaruna Buddhist Meditation Center Offers ongoing introductory and advanced classes. Weds at noon, Tues & Weds evenings 7:30â&#x20AC;&#x201C;8:45pm Prayers for World Peace, Sun, 10:30â&#x20AC;&#x201C;11:45am Everyone welcome. 304 Petaluma Blvd., North, Petaluma www.meditationinnorcal.org

Everyoneâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s personal wishes and spiritual aspirations meet obstacles. Sometimes these obstructions seem like real demons that plague our good intentions. In this day course youâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;ll learn meditations and methods to avert the obstacles in your life. Saturday, 10/31, 10am-3pm Suggested Donation $25, includes vege lunch Mahakaruna Buddhist Meditation Center 304 Petaluma Blvd. North, Petaluma 707.766.7720 or info@meditatein petaluma www.meditationinnorcal.org All are welcome No prior experience in necessary

Share your organizationâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s inspiration with over 95,100 Bohemian Readers monthly!

Phone: 707.527.1200 email: sales@bohemian.com

Align Spine, Relax Muscles, add Flexibility. Lose Weight-Inflammation-Sleep Better. Far-infrared Jade Massage Beds do it all. Great Holiday demo model discounts. Try it at 1030 Second St., Santa Rosa. Hours and Info call: 707-888-7727

Golden Star Grafix Need a quality designer? Business cards, brochures, flyers, posters, digital collage, cd covers, photographic restoration, general marketing materials. Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924

MacAdvantage Macintosh Computer Repair FREE Diagnosis, Friendly In-House Staff Answer Calls, Hardware/Software, DATA Recovery, Internet, Email, Wireless Network Setup & Security, Apple Authorized Business Agent, Tam Nguyen-Chief Tech, M-F 10-6. 707.664.0400, info@themacadvantage.com

Joe Louvar Productions QUALITY LIVE AUDIO RECORDING 707.479.0050

Goebel Builders Jay Goebel, General Contractor, Lic. #812957 Quality Workmanship, Friendly Service, and Dependability You Can Trust.Insured with Local references Repairs, Custom Builds, and Troubleshooting Call today and get the job DONE! 707-794-7955 www.goebelbuilders.com

Youth Failing School or School Failing Our Youth ? Try Rancho Bodega School - Small Group/One on One Instruction - Enriched Middle/High School Curriculum - Special Studies/Independent Study Emphasizing Music & Art Serving Grades 7-12 NOW ENROLLING !! Call 707-795-7166 www.ranchobodegaschool.com

Santa Rosa Plumbing Water Conservation Experts. Friendly, Honest Service. Licensed, Bonded and Insured. License #871026

tankless water heaters, high efficiency toilets recirculation, general plumbing needs 707.528.8228

Green Earth Catering Organic and Earth friendly foods and supplies Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager. 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell redgore23@aol.com

Photography by Paul Burke 707.664.0178 boomburke@hotmail.com

Euro Business Solutions Exploring The Human Element in Business. Call us for a FREE, expert consultation @ 707.483.5135. Our Team Does it All; from Website to Powerful Staff Motivation. Ask About Our Stimulus Package.

Hand Blown Glass Art Makes a Great Gift Made by Local artists, one of a kind glass art pieces at incredible prices. Only at Tama Ramaâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s in Downtown Cotati. 8252 Old Redwood Hwy, Cotati (707) 795-1425

HOLIDAY

arts 2009

This Spectacular Issue Invites All Arts Organizatons to Perform!

November 11th Book your reservation NOW!

Call 707.527.1200 today! sales@bohemian.com THE BOHEMIAN

10.28.09-11.03.09

51


SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM

1901 CLEVELAND AVE SUITE B SANTA ROSA 707.576.0818 www.srtp.net

Sonoma County Showcase

We provide treatment for: Oxycontin, Vicodin and Heroin utilizing replacement medications. We also treat Methamphetamine and other stimulant dependence. s3UBUTEX3UBOXONEAVAILABLE s0ROVIDING4REATMENTSINCE s#ONFIDENTIALITYASSUREd

Relapse Doesnâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;t Mean Failure

Sat., Nov. 7, 11am - 5pm. Free admission and parking for Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help. (707) 576 0818 public! Grace Pavillion, Sonoma County Fairgrounds, Santa Rosa. Exhibitions, entertainment, door prizes, SKIRT CHASER VINTAGE gifts. 707-527-7563. www.sonomacoeventsunlimited.com NEW LOCATION! 208 Davis Street., Railroad Square 707546-4021. ALWAYS BUYING!

MEDICAL MARIJUANA EVALUATIONS Affordable, Professional, & Trusted. Appt. within 1 week GUARANTEED!! Call (707) 568-0420 24/7 Verification www.GREEN215.com

Santa Rosa Treatment Program

Affordable Couples Counseling Compassionate, Sensitive, Effective Psychotherapy for Relationship Problems John Omaha, Ph.D. Registered Marriage and Family Therapist Intern Under supervision of Lanie Abrams, MFT (#28231) Free Introductory Session Sliding Scale Call Today: 707-545-5363

get

Medical Marijuana Certifications Santa Rosa. Best price. 24/7 authentication. 707-575-7375 www.mmj.medical-library.net Weight Management vs BodyFat Reduction. What works and why diets don`t work! Bodylean 707-696-5326. LVMSG.

Northstone ORGANICS

"Mendocino County's Original" Fine Medicinal Grade Cannabis

Farm-Direct Discreetly to Your Door*

Small Farms Strong Community Sustainable Living WWW.NORTHSTONEORGANICS.COM (707) 485-8814 * For qualified patients only. Valid California I.D. and Doctorâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s recommendation required.

high

SANTA ROSA TREATMENT PROGRAM 1901 Cleveland Ave Suite B, Santa Rosa 707-576-0818 www.srtp.net Medicann - Med. Marijuana Evaluations New Cotati Office Now Open. 866-632-6627 Free I.D. card. 24/7 verification. Doctor/patient confidentiality. Lic. MD. Discount for MediCal, MediCare and Vets.

Santa Rosa Treatment Program can help.(707) 576-0818.

Donate Your Auto 800.380.5257 We do all DMV. Free pick up- running or not (restrictions apply). Live operators- 7 days! Help the Polly Klaas Foundation provide safety information and assist families in bringing kids home safely.

Golden Star Grafix

life

FREE Nutrition Seminars

Confidential Program. (707) 576 1919

Meth and Alcohol Treatment that allows you to keep your day job!

Your Personality Determines Your Happiness

Know why? Call for your free personality test. Call 1-800-293-6463

SUBUTEX/SUBOXONE available for Safe Oxycontin, Vicodin, Other Opiate Withdrawal!

Need a quality designer? Business cards, brochures, flyers, posters, digital collage, cd covers, photographic restoration, general marketing materials. Mark Schaumann 707.795.0924

on not on drugs

Black Cat Bar & Humble Pie Restaurant

â&#x20AC;˘ Heroin/Opiate (Vicodin, Oxycontin) detox and maintenance utilizing Methadone

Green Earth Catering

Music, Drink Specials, Seriously Delicious Food! Open Mic Wednesday nights. A must try! The Black Cat is located at 10056 Main St., Penngrove, 707.793.9480. Check it out now!

Organic and Earth friendly foods and supplies Scott Goree - Entertainment coordinator and business manager. 707.795.7358 home, 707.479.5481 cell redgore23@aol.com

â&#x20AC;˘ Subutex/Suboxone available

Whereâ&#x20AC;&#x2122;s My Happiness?

â&#x20AC;˘ Providing Treatment since 1984

Find out!

â&#x20AC;˘ Methamphetamine and other stimulant treatment

â&#x20AC;˘ Confidentiality assured

THRIVE HYDROPONICS Your House & Garden Specialists. Competitive Prices, Expert Knowledge, Great Location Customer Satisfaction Guaranteed! 70 A West North Street Healdsburg CA 707433-4068

HAVING A BAD DAY? EVERYDAY? Are your decisions mistreating YOU?

Learn the Release Technique. 1st Time Live Class in Sonoma County. Nov.13,14,15. As taught nationwide since 1976. www.Releasetechnique.com Call Richard 707.874.1155

Turning Point Residential Program

â&#x20AC;˘ 30 to 270 days of treatment NO job, NO family, wrong friendsâ&#x20AC;Ś â&#x20AC;˘ Opiate Treatment Track feeling helpless and hopeless. WE CAN HELP! â&#x20AC;˘ NEW Payment Plan Please call 707.544.3295 today or visit www.daacinfo.org A F F O R DA B L E â&#x20AC;˘ CO N F I D E N T I A L â&#x20AC;˘ 3 5 Y E A R S E X P E R I E N C E


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