Obscure Law School Truths Have you ever realized that the law school community is like its own little village, with separate social customs, and idiosyncrasies? As I pause from studying Charter Again to contemplate this theory, two ideas come to me faster than the end of this humiliating year. The Library Crush If you’re a law student, you have a crush/sneak peaks at some hottie you always see in the library. Said hottie probably doesn’t have the slightest idea who you are, and probably doesn’t know because they are busy sneaking peaks at some hottie they always see in the library, who doesn’t notice, because they are creeping on someone else, and so on. When one enters the library and sees students bestrewn throughout it, one’s gut reaction might be “look at all these academically apt pupils! They’re like sweet summer peaches just waiting to be picked!” They do not see the complex web of crushes that lies therein. If you were to find some way to reveal the crushlinks between people, a confusing tangled web would emerge (like in bankrobbing movies where someone wears those cool hitech goggles to see all the alarmlinked lasers in the room). Someone is crushed on by someone, who is crushed on by someone, who is crushed on by someone… and the web emerges that always ends with “…who is crushed on by David Samuel. That is all.” My crush from last year has read her last word as a student. I won’t mention her name (Ed. Note Living with Dave has allowed me to become privy to some “sensitive” matters. Dave told me in confidence who his beloved crush was. I won't totally betray Dave's trust, but I'll give you a hint. Her initials are MEGAN MCAVOY!!! That’s for being late with your article!!! Suckaaaa!) I have a new library crush this year, and she’s actually a commerce student. Isnt’t that naughty? She’s kind of like a Capulet, except with less suicide, which makes her even sexier.
The Awkward, Sober Greeting You Exchange With Someone You Met While Drunk The following is a widespread occurrence that has happened to at least 3 U of Sask law students. Here is the sequence of events: you are at a sanctioned law school social event, and you meet someone; gender is irrelevant. You laugh together, and exchange tales of memories past. You part ways. You see this person at school, for the first time since the drunken convo. You both either pretend not to see each other, or you exchange this weird, unidentified social exchange half smile, half nod. In all likelihood they will say nothing. In shock at how rude they are, you say nothing as well. The memory you have with them becomes as unspoken of as that drunken, inappropriate incident you had with your best friend’s sister that you both never, for the love of Christ, speak of.
This is an unfortunate occurrence. My theory is that the change of social context causes doubt whether you’re both on the same page. In that moment, you doubt whether the other person recognizes, or even remembers you. I’m not even sure. Admittedly, occasionally in social situations I get as nervous as a prostitute in a confession booth. But when I see someone who I met on the past weekend, I shoot them a smile that could give warm fuzzies to a statue. Yet still… nothing. The worst thing is that all the people I’ve talked to were cool in the extreme. I only wish they would talk to me again. A hug would do too.
Published on Apr 2, 2009