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Heartfelt By: Luis M. Rodriguez

A collection of Poems & Short Stories


Table of Contents In Order

By Category Anger The Last Battle

Boredom ………………….. 4 Dreamer …………………… 5

Love

Heartfelt ………………….. 6

My Wedding

The Last Battle …………. 7

Snow-covered Kiss

Lifeless Living ………….. 8 My Wedding …………….. 9 Painful …………………… 10 Snow-covered Kiss …… 11 Unspoken Truths …… 12 Weddings to Funeral .. 13 Who can it be? ………… 14

Who can it be? Sadness Dreamer Heartfelt Lifeless Living Painful Weddings to Funeral Random Boredom

Stories Beauty Devine ………………………………………………………………… 15 Beauty Devine Pt.II …………………………………………………………. 16 Beauty Devine Pt.III ……………………………………………………….. 17 Unspoken Truths ………………………………………………………….. 18


Boredom

I refuse to let boredom take hold of my time, instead i dream of possibilities of the fun kind, i could ski down a mountain with my feet to the sky, with my hands tied behind me, and my mouth stuffed with pie, I could bowl with my friends but with no ball in sight, we would roll up our clothes to then bowl through the night, i could draw a nice painting but paint is too mundane, so instead ill use doo doo, and make myself seem insane, i could compose my own song but such instruments are boring, so instead I’ll record my mom while she's snoring, i could always go cook something good to devour, but the food i make, would make obese people cower. so many possibilities but none can be mine, at least this took away 10 minutes of my time.


Dreamer

why do i keep putting myself in these situations? feeling things that i know shouldn’t be felt, for people i know i shouldn’t feel them for, am i an idiot? no, i am a dreamer, a poet, an artist, who can’t help but wear his heart on his sleeve while everyone decides to wipe their nose with it, staining my fragile heart with their disgusting, repugnant, nasal secretion, and go on with their lives, like nothing happened, like no one was hurt, but me...


Heartfelt I lay on my bed and think, So many thoughts go through my mind, So many problems that I can’t find, A way to solve them, I think of you most of the time, And think how would it be? If your heart was linked with mine, But then I start to see, It will never be, I treat you like the queen you are, They treat you like you’re worthless, I’ve gone against advice from all, To show you that you’re priceless, And yet, Mistakes repeat, My heart forced to pay, While you continue on, Like nothing occurred, Thrown out like trash, But I can’t help it, It’s in my nature, I care about you and I always will, I’ll be there for you until the world stands still, Why? Because I love you


The Last Battle An Underground world of lifeless dreaming, worthless meanings, Heartless feelings, To live or die, It hurts, but why. Why see life like a living doom, to be dead soon, to be filled with misery and despair, when there's no one to care, No one to be there, to make you smile, to buy her a bear to stay a while, yet, no one to let u down, to have a big fight, to then make up, lie about who's right, to hear the same excuse repeated, to take it in seated, convinced I am needed, and then told to beat it. Never again, for me I am done, Now you tell me which of us really won.


Lifeless Living Lifeless living is a horrible concept, to live but be dead, to lay lifeless on your bed, letting life escape from your hand, but why, why go on when it doesn't go as planned, why? give up on your dreams, why? stop what you're doing when it seems, like you awoke from a bad dream, When the knife in your hand just looks back at you, the reflection on it taunting you, to kill a part of you that doesn’t exist, thinking who did this while you go down the list, of people who changed, people whose names, goes unsaid, people, who to me are now dead,


My Wedding

I keep having dreams of my wedding, and it's always you wearing that beautiful white dress, it's always you wearing that bright smile and walking down that long aisle, it's always you whom i wait for at the end, anxious and excited to finally make you mine.. it’s with you i see playing a song together with two grand pianos and our voices as one, inter-twined, in perfect harmony... it’s with you i dance the first dance of a husband and wife, graceful steps and gentle slides across the wood floor, carefully choreographed dips and twirls, spins and swirls, laughter and applause from family and friends, lost in your eyes and the new life we've begun, sparkle of the diamond newly placed on your finger, Held tight while the slow music surrounds us, an unexpected kiss, an unrehearsed gesture of love, a certainty of a bright future ahead, with you by my side.


Painful

Silence, Listen Note the beating of my heart stopped My fingers gone cold My hair has grown old and life less Getting ideas of us apart Stop this! See the tears drop on this page Stop this! I need you You need me You have me Stop this pain growing in my heart Growing in the pit of my soul and escaping Through my eyes This paper is my flesh The ink, my blood This poem is me, broken yet strong I have you My eyes have gone blurry And my head light Hysterical, in pain Prepared to not disappoint I Love You And I’m ready to show you how Much You are the shooting star i wish upon to shine in my moment of night


Snow-covered Kiss

A kiss upon my lips, To unfreeze this painful cold, Rosy cheek, Cheesy smile, Blushing at the thought, Your breath warming my cold nose, My kiss warming your cold lips. A blanket of snow surrounding us, Beautiful Scene.. Beautiful Eyes, Looking into my heart's desire Kiss me or I’ll freeze, Just things that could've been, just things that should've been.


Weddings to Funeral Last night i couldn't sleep, Dreams turned to nightmares, weddings into funerals, love into despair, what a nightmare, what a scare, where has my joy gone? where has my heart dropped? tears fall in swift continuous motions, sleep deprived, mind in a twist, why do i take things so hard? why do you ask? i am an artist, the brightest art is made in the artist's darkest hour, true beauty in art, is an artist's broken heart


Who can it be? The world is at its peak, My reason in life I have to seek, Armageddon won’t stop me now, I'll find my love, but I don’t know how, Where to look, times running out, Who could it be I’m thinking about? In my dreams only feel her and her face is unknown, Even if I wish to see her Her face is not shown, Who could it be? whose scent follows me wherever I go? Who could it be? whose body I feel yet still I don’t know, Who can’t I see? But knows I’m waiting for her to tell me what to do, Who can it be? By now it’s obvious that that person is u


Beauty Devine This is my story, and she was the star, her smile bright, and her beauty known far, Her eyes as radiant as the shining sea, no man was luckier than her groom to be, Who's luck in itself blessed him with her, to awaken every morning right next to her, any man's dream, for him was true, every man's dream. for him was true Her locks as yellow as the sunflower's bloom, with despair and the scare of meeting her doom, she flees at midnight with haste from her room, covered by darkness, guided by moon. But with haste quite quickly the husband does chase, to return his bride to her proper place, to keep her heart locked away, In the woods she goes to meet her love, the one she loves, the one she loves, the one forbidden for her to love, the one now hiding in the tree above, With gentle fingers he taps her shoulder, and takes her away from evil's view, with sincere intentions of living together, and starting their lives and family anew

but as quickly as their happiness came, so returned their fear, as the moonlight was leaving and the sun soon will be gleaming, their enemies were drawing near. This story of romance turns into despair, as hatred and jealousy roamed the air a glimpse was all, of her beautiful hair, to continue with his blood thirst without a care. soon they were cornered trapped in a cage, the husband with his heart full of rage, killed his wife, out of pure smite, in front of her lover in broad daylight. he did escape with his heart torn in half, his beloved's napkin held tight in his hand, the only reminder of the life she lived, the sight and the blood of what that man did. to his love. to my love. he killed my love, that much is true, the only thinking now left to do, is when and how to go about, taking his life without a doubt.


Beauty Devine Pt.II

I await in the dark, covered by shadows, for his face to be revealed to me, with months of planning and careful thinking, revenge is swift, and all is linking but he has been careful, and quick with his steps, for he knew i was coming, to destroy him no less, but i have been cunning, to which careful can’t compare, patient i have been but now i am there. to make the injustice, I’ve suffered.....fair. and now on this night, just like the one before, where my love was lost, to be seen no more,

i will strike at the strike, of midnight tonight, and replace the arrogance in his heart, with fright it is time, i can see, he comes out for his walk, round the back three times, before he returns to sleep, and that’s when my knife, will insert him deep! Out he comes, and in i go, to await for his return i know, in the darkness i hide my face, like my mercy is hidden by hate. He returns..... how does it feel i ask, to be alone with me and no help, How does it feel to look in the eyes, the eyes of death ITSELF!


Beauty Devine Pt.III

Sorry to disappoint you. but no fear in this heart, it's about time, it's been tearing me apart, i have been waiting, for you since the start. Confused are you? with your knife at my side, but what you neglect to see, is how my plan's end, with your known presence, coincide. you alone know what happened, you alone saw what was done, my wife's absence has caused a ruckus, a sorrow melody has been sung, to honor her death by unknown causes, and only you can ruin my fun, and so with you i must be done. Guards come here, there is a stranger in my room, he is here to take my life, he came tonight to meet my doom, search him now and you will find, a napkin of my spouse's kind, and here he is to finish his mission, before he strikes come and dismiss him, He killed my wife and now came for me, stop him now before I’m dead to be, remember you worm i am not one to play, remember today as the day, you ALMOST had your way


Unspoken Truths Dreams are impossible to completely understand. Regardless of all the research done and dream dictionaries out there made to interpret them, one

It still seemed so real to me. I am aware of the power a person‟s mind has over emotions and even the physical aspect but even to this extent it felt too real, too right. I spit, rinsed and replaced my toothbrush back to its original place. My heart feels so hollow. Such extreme disappointment when I realized it had been nothing more than a dream.

cannot truly interpret one‟s desires of the heart. I had a dream, but this dream of mine is quite confusing to me. Not that it‟s difficult to understand but I can‟t make the decision of whether my dream was one of desire or possibility. I got up and sat at the corner of my bed, trying to rub out the sandman‟s dust from my eyes before starting my day. What a horrid expression that is; the sandman, reminds me that during those times, televisions were nowhere close to being invented so

I walked to the kitchen for my normal consumption of coffee and croissant breakfast to get my heart flowing and a step closer to clogging. For me it has become a morning ritual in which I can‟t break out of, or want to for that matter. Not that I am a pessimist but my mornings always tend to come out most terrible, this one in particular has become the granddaddy of suck. I have never had such a desire to remain asleep, to not have to greet the morning sun again but remain in my fantasy land. But here I am, drinking coffee with not enough sugar, a two day old croissant and a very long day ahead. I‟m stuck here, Instead of being „there‟, in my dream…

they had no choice but to make up a lot of crap. The dream is still vibrant in my mind; my lips still tingle. My mind began to wander off into this counterfeit world of mine, this world I could only wish could become reality:

She sat in a chair not too far from me. Our families had gathered together for a Christmas dinner, something that hasn‟t been done in give or take five years but had started and felt as if it were five days instead. We were in a beautiful Victorian style house, two stories high with beautiful paintings and art hanging on its walls. This house I‟ve never seen before but felt it to be so familiar. We were in the library, bountiful collection of literature and poetry, novels and biographies surrounded us. In the center stood a beautiful Steinway Louis XV white satin finish grand piano with gilt carvings. Long windows took up the one wall that wasn‟t covered by a book shelf, providing us with natural lighting.

“What are you thinking about?” she said, more as a way to break the silence then to get an answer. “Nothing, just how beautiful the night is” I lied. I was actually admiring more the natural beauty radiating from her, the moon has created a dreamy ambient and given her already delicate features soft shadows. These simple shadows had put me in a trance, which her question had broken me from. She smiled. She got up from her seat and went to the piano. I couldn‟t help but notice her figure, and she couldn‟t help noticing me noticing her. She wore a beautiful black evening dress with white leaf designs caressing her waist; parted elegantly down her left leg. This strapless dress accentuates her flawless body, and I didn‟t mind it one bit. Her hair was curled and shining under the light of the moon, her shoes echoed as she made gentle and poised steps in her black three inch heels. She sat on the piano and fiddled with the keys.


“Come here” The melody was drowned out by my phone‟s annoying ringing. I feel as if phone companies gathered together one day and agreed on the most annoying ringtone, sort of like a giant middle finger to their customers‟ face. I Ignored the call. My mother has found it difficult to “cut the umbilical cord”, I am now a twenty eight year old accountant and for her I‟m still a four year old kid pretending to be Batman. I got into my black Lincoln Navigator and eased out of my drive way. I looked back at my current residence and grimaced at the comparison between this house and the one I dreamt of…

She is an adorable one. Her dimples were deep as she smiled and giggled at our small jam session. A hand touch here, a two second caress there pretty much explained our time on the piano. It was always like this, subtle flirting with a hint of mixed signals and a whole lot of enjoyment. She‟d always been moderately reserved and a mystery to all who surrounded her, no one ever knew what she was thinking or what she wanted. She could have a crush on you, get over it and you would be oblivious to the whole thing. But it added to her appeal, what made her different. Our fingers dance around the white and black keys together making beautiful melodies. “Come on, let‟s go eat, I‟m starving” I whispered. I lead her to the kitchen where everyone was gathered. We ate, and ate, and ate till our clothes couldn‟t handle the consumption. The food was amazing, both her mom and mine went all out. It was spread out buffet style and the aromas of all Dominican

delicacies were intoxicating. We talked into the night about anything and everything. Someone was at the window. I saw him from the corner of my eye; he seemed to be there for…her. She got up from the couch and went to the window. I listened. “What are you doing here?” I heard her say. “I‟m here for you, c‟mon lets go for a walk.” My heart dropped, this guy has a lot of nerve. She came back to me and said “I‟ll be right back I promise.” She went to the guest room in my house she was sleeping in to get her coat. I had less than two minutes to decide on what to do. My stomach began to hurt and my heart began to race. She came out of the room and walked towards the door. As soon as she walked past me I grabbed her hand and spun her into my arms. My heart stopped. I kissed her with all the passion I could muster past my anxiety. I felt her arms wrap around my neck and her lips press harder into mine. Our lips parted, I looked into her eyes both with joy and with a bit of confusion. I didn‟t see this going the way it did, I expected a smack across my face or worse. “I didn‟t think...” I began, but she quickly kissed me. The universal way of saying, „don‟t ruin the moment‟. Unspoken feelings began pouring out of us through our kiss, telling each other things neither of us was brave enough to share before. She looked into my eyes, her eyes bright and yearning. “What took you so long? “She smiled.


Heartfelt | A Collection of Poetry & Short Stories