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Girl Gets Ring by Jonathan Green & T Dub Jackson How to Go From "Hello" to "I Do" as Fast as Womanly Possible Even If He's A Hard To Land Man

This ebook is presented to you for informational purposes only and is not a substitution for any professional advice. The contents herein are based on the views and opinions of the author and all associated contributors.

While every effort has been made by the author and all associated contributors to present accurate and up to date information within this document, it is apparent technologies rapidly change. Therefore, the author and all associated contributors reserve the right to update the contents and information provided herein as these changes progress. The author and/or all associated contributors take no responsibility for any errors or omissions if such discrepancies exist within this document.

The author and all other contributors accept no responsibility for any consequential actions taken, whether monetary, legal, or otherwise, by any and all readers of the materials provided. It is the readers sole responsibility to seek professional advice before taking any action on their part.

Readers results will vary based on their skill level and individual perception of the contents herein, and thus no guarantees, monetarily or otherwise, can be made accurately. Therefore, no guarantees are made.

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Every relationship is a story. We all know how we want the story to end. You and your perfect man side by side at the altar. Behind you, your family and friends bear witness to your lifelong commitment to each other. You want to be the girl who gets the ring. Where are you in the story? Are you already with a good man, but he refuses to ‘pop the question’? He says, “Let me complete my MBA first.” Or… “Let me save more money first.” Or some other reason why he’s not ready to tie the knot…just yet. Or? Are you the girl who gets asked out a lot? And your first few dates start with a bang, but then fizzle when he stops calling? Are you getting too close? Too soon? Or? Are you back in the dating scene after a break up? A break up which has left you wondering if there was something wrong with him? Or with the men you pick? You wonder if your ‘man picker’ is out of whack?...Or worse, after you watch so many of your friends get engaged you can’t help but say to yourself :“What’s wrong with me?”

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Jonathan Green, Author of Girlfriend in a Week, has personally worked with hundreds of men to improve their love lives and thousands more through his books and training videos. For years Jonathan has helped men fix their dating lives and now he’s finally come over to the other side and is ready to reveal his secrets to women. Jonathan has traveled the world training men privately and speaking at conferences, helping lonely men realize that love is possible for them. As an expert at starting relationships, he has approached and spoken with over 35,000 women around the world in bars, clubs and even on the streets. As one of the top dating coaches for men in the world, Jonathan is uniquely suited to show you EXACTLY what men are thinking and how to decode their strange behavior. He knows every secret and strategy that men employ in relationships and he is ready to reveal them all. TW “T DUB” Jackson: T Dub, Author of The Magic Of Making Up, has directly and indirectly helped over 100,000 couples in over 77 countries fix badly broken relationships. In most cases, T Dub helps salvage relationships AFTER one party has already declared “it’s over” and when there’s only one person left trying desperately to save their marriage or relationship. He is a pioneer in relationship bonding and re-bonding. T Dub discovered early on in his life that NOBODY is immune to the powerful principles of human bonding. He is most happy when he is teaching men and women to form (or reform) strong bonds in their relationships, whether it’s starting a new relationship on the right foot, a mature relationship in need of new life, or a broken relationship requiring a drastic overhaul. No description of T Dub is complete without giving credit to his best friend of 16 years, and a woman who he has learned so much from…his wife Jeannie.

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Glad you asked! In a nutshell… While T Dub is a happily married man, obviously he hasn’t been active in the dating scene for 16 years. And… While Jonathan is very active in today’s dating scene, he has hasn’t been happily married for 16 years. By joining forces we can expertly guide and speed you along any and all stages of the relationship cycle. After this point…. Anywhere Jonathan is writing for you will be in BLACK Anywhere T Dub is writing for you will be in BLUE

Jonathan can help you “pack” for your trip, get you pointed in the right direction and help you steer clear of major obstacles you MUST avoid when starting your journey. T Dub will help you build strong bonds and strengthen your relationship as quickly as ‘womanly’ possible NOT ONLY as you are heading towards the altar, but most importantly so that you, your husband and family live ‘happily ever after’.

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No matter where you are in your love story this book is going to help you get through the rest of the phases to become the girl who gets the ring. During the course of this guide you will learn to understand exactly what men are thinking at each stage and specific principles and techniques that will help you move your story forward. You have an ADVANTAGE over other women now. You have two of the top minds in dating in the world on your side. And we are both men. I have been a full time professional dating coach for men for over three years and in that time I have worked personally with hundreds of men to find the right woman for each of them. FYI: These are good men with great character and many are leaders of industry, but they struggle to find good women…more on this later. I’ll open the curtain and lay bare secrets about men that most women will never know. You will learn what men are thinking and how to translate our baffling behavior. You’ll in essence become a member of the inner circle and learn many of the techniques that work on both men and women. We’re very excited to share all of them with you.

In order to finish our journey together we need your help! You have to commit to not only taking the time to read AND study Girl Gets Ring, but to perform the simple exercises and homework. You can do it.

My partner T Dub is going to teach you the bonding secrets he’s used to help heal and strengthen hundreds of thousands of relationships all over the globe. These are under the radar bonding techniques that ALWAYS work because these techniques push buttons which were installed in men by Mother Nature herself. No man is immune. Now that you have decided to take this journey with us as your guides, we feel you are part of our family. Our goal is for you to find YOUR perfect man. Build a bond with him so strong that he asks for your hand. And begin your family and life together. When you do…SEND PICTURES PLEASE! We can’t WAIT for you to send the email with a picture of you getting your ring.

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Intuitively most women sense that men don’t process their feelings the same way that they do. Most women also know men’s behaviors and actions are consequences of how they feel. What most women never figure out is exactly how men DO (or don’t) process their feelings. What happens? Men act and behave in ways that not only confuse and frustrate women, but often his unexplained behavior will almost drive a sane girl to the mad house. Since she can’t figure what he’s thinking or why he does what he does, she may try to sit him down and “talk it out”. “Talking it out” clams him up at best, at worst, he feels grilled and may show anger or defensiveness. You’ve likely witnessed this for yourself? If situations seemingly as insignificant as him getting lost cause tiny storms of strange reactions, then talk of commitment, moving the relationship to the next level or marriage blow in category 5 typhoons. Throughout Girl Gets Ring we’ll be guiding you through each step of moving your relationship forward without setting off his emergency broadcast system. Right now, I want you to fully comprehend some important things about him. Commit this to memory. It’s crucial. How much a man loves you has ALMOST NOTHING to do with how willing he is to move his relationship forward with you.

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“If he loves me, he’ll want to be with me forever.”

Most women I’ve coached believe this myth, if not intellectually, they believe it deep down emotionally. What I mean is a man’s unwillingness to move the relationship to the next level is usually interpreted by his girlfriend or fiancé as a lack of love for her OR that he is a commitment phobe. Both of which are untrue. Believing and acting upon either only makes matters worse. Trying to make him love you more or fix his commitment phobia will in most cases drive him further. What’s a girl to do? First, understand that men don’t process most of their feelings in their head. They process them, if they process them at all, in their gut or heart. In fact, most of the time, men do NOT process their feelings. And because of how most men are raised, many try to ignore their feelings altogether. While women may be able to verbalize and paint elaborate and detailed pictures about how they feel, men are like kindergarteners coloring with three basic colors. Tongues out and coloring all outside the lines too. I want you to imagine… Inside every man’s heart is this imaginary traffic light. Let’s borrow the phrase “heart light”. His heart light just like a traffic light has three colors, red, yellow and green. When he needs to make an important EMOTIONAL decision, he may think he makes them intellectually and rationally, but what REALLY happens is his heart light guides and largely controls his actions. This is why a man can be very much in love, but if his heart light is yellow or red he will not move forward. He won’t even be able to tell you why!

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It’s not only frustrating for you, it’s maddening to him as well because he DOES love you, but he can’t intellectually process why he’s stuck. He’ll likely make MANY excuses to you and to himself. In most cases, he’s not trying to deceive. He just can’t explain what’s going on even to himself. He just feels that something is not right. (Yellow or Red Light) As we take your hand and guide you through your path we’ll help you discover and understand what makes him go from green to yellow, yellow to red and how to get him back to green again. A man who is in love AND has a green heart light WANTS to move forward in a relationship and he’ll practically pick you up and carry you down the aisle. Don’t worry! You won’t have to walk on eggshells trying to keep his light green all of the time.

If you’re already involved with a man and you’re trying to get to the next level, I highly encourage you to go through all of the phases of Girl Gets Ring. You may learn something crucial as to what color his heart light is now and where it changed.

The first three to six months a man is in a relationship his heart light is more sensitive to flip flopping back in forth between green, yellow, green, yellow, red, yellow, green etc. Good news is once his signal goes bright green, his decision to move to the next level becomes much more stable. He typically stays green. This doesn’t mean something can’t happen to change his heart light, but it would have to be much more drastic than at the start. Let’s begin with finding him, attracting him and making it easy for him to fall in love. As we go along we’ll use pictures of our traffic signals to call attention to actions which may cause him to change color.

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Being single in our society sometimes can feel like you have a disease. I know exactly how this feels because I am single right now. And I am a professional dating coach, so I get it pretty bad. My area of expertise is being single and dating, so the moment I enter a serious relationship I will lose my edge. There are a lot of people who can’t understand that someone would be single on purpose. There is nothing wrong with being single. It’s a great time in your life to build the foundation for all your future relationships. As you get to know me throughout this book, you will discover that I love telling stories about the people around me as a way of teaching and illustrating points. The stories are always my favorite part of any book, so I make sure to fill my book with what I love. So please allow me to share with you a story about a woman who actually makes several appearances in this book.

As you get to know me throughout this book, you will discover that I love telling stories about the people around me as a way of teaching and illustrating points. The stories are always my favorite part of any book, so I make sure to fill my book with what I love. So please allow me to share with you a story about a woman who actually makes several appearances in this book.

I know a woman who has the worst relationships. She cheats on all of the guys she dates and her relationships always end in an explosion. I have known her for a really long time and I have affection for her…not judgment. But what I have noticed is that she is never single. She just can’t stand to be alone. She has no foundation for her relationships. Her self-confidence is low, which means she only dates me with low selfconfidence. It’s a cycle that won’t break until she spends some time alone and really builds up her identity.

The most important and amazing thing about being single is that you have a chance to find out what actually makes you happy.

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When you are single is the perfect time to get to know yourself. Throughout this guide you will learn tactics and techniques that have their foundation in this phase in your life. Rather than write everything twice, I’ll just share with you the components of your personality that you develop when you are alone.

As strange as it sounds I know a lot of people who have no idea what makes them happy. They end up on a path and they’re not sure how they got there. This can happen with your career, where you live and your relationships. So go out and try new things. You are free and can do anything you want with nobody to judge you or limit you. Once you actually know what makes you happy, you can find men who enjoy the same things. How nice would it be to start a relationship with someone who shares the same joys as you? One of my great passions in life is snowboarding. I don't get to do it nearly enough because of logistics and I live in Florida, which has a disappointing amount of snow each winter. But I remember like yesterday when I was going down a slope in Japan and my Ipod was playing the perfect track as the sun was setting. This was one of my perfect moments in life. So I would love to spend my time with someone who feels the same way in this moment. You need to find your passion while you are still single. What gets your heart beating and makes your eyes go wide? Is it travel? Is it helping people? Is it making music or art or poetry? As we delve into the foundations of attraction you will learn how important having passion is to attracting the right kind of man. You don’t want to wait to try and find your passion in that moment. During your singledom you also want to really dig in and decide who you are. Who do you want to be? How do you want to be remembered? What makes you unique? What have you done to affect the world? I know these can be brutal questions because they really dig to your core. Just as when you are building a great cathedral, you must dig until you hit bedrock. That’s where you build your relationship. Not on the sand. I think it’s important to be emotionally honest with you and so I will share some of my answers to these questions. Not to impress you with how great I am, but instead to lead by example. My dream has always been to be a writer. I have flowed towards and away from this career for a decade. My real dream is to have millions of women read this book. I want all of the people I helped find happiness to remember me. In that way I will gain immortality. Of course as a woman your dreams will be a little bit different and that’s wonderful.

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I have been through quite a few careers before finding myself doing what I was meant to do. I worked in education for a very long time. I have done everything from teaching DJing at inner city schools to running part of the English departments at one of the best universities in America. I have worked selling computers and I have run a tutoring agency. I have done a lot of other things in between. All of these different experiences led me on the path to finding out who I truly am and what kind of man I want to be. Not only do you want to develop your career aspirations during this time, you also want to decide what kind of woman you want to be. Throughout this book you will see just how important honesty is in a relationship and in life. You really find out who you are when you are alone and nobody’s watching. It’s easy not to steal money off a desk in a room full of people, but it’s a lot more tempting when nobody will ever find out. In 1996 the movie Jerry Maguire with Tom Cruise hit the silver screen and one of the most poisonous lines to come out of that movie was, “You complete me.” “You complete me.” Sounds romantic doesn’t it? But as a man who helps put relationships back together from every corner of this world, I can tell you firsthand many relationships sink BECAUSE one or both people are looking for someone to ‘complete’ him or her. As a happily married man, it shocks some people when I say that as much as I love my wife Jeannie, I am still a whole man without her. What’s more shocking to some…I think? Is the FACT that I am more attracted to and IN LOVE with Jeannie because I know she’d still be a whole person WITHOUT ME. I prefer her. And she prefers me. We COMPLEMENT…not complete each other. We are happy. Contrast this with… “I NEED you to complete me…AND I NEED to feel like I complete you.” This IS insanity and CAUSES break ups, divorce and UNHAPPINESS. If a woman, let’s call her Irene, is single she has two general choices about how she feels and thinks about being single. (How she feels and thinks then determines her actions.)

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She can view herself as ‘Incomplete Irene’. Incomplete Irene has a tendency to look for love in all the wrong places…see Mr. Right in every face…and come off as needy. Can you see Incomplete Irene’s problem? I’m sure you can. May I share something else that I see happening? This is DANGEROUS! Incomplete Irene starts to attract men who are LOOKING to TAKE ADVANTAGE of her neediness. In short, these men know how and are VERY adept at finding needy women to take advantage of. Are you starting to see why the quote “You complete me” is so venomous? So what is the antidote?

To become a “Complete Cathy.” Complete Cathy uses her singledom to discover more about herself. She is perfectly happy to spend an evening alone. This doesn’t mean she avoids social interactions, but she is comfortable being by herself. Cathy asks herself… “What makes ME happy?” Not what makes her parents happy…or what would her sister want her to do…or what her friends think of her because she’s not in a relationship yet. As Cathy explores what gets her blood pumping, she feels INSPIRED to go out and experience the things that make her happy. Maybe it’s horseback riding? Learning to fire a handgun at the shooting range? Taking that acting class? As she’s doing these new things she realizes she IS a complete person. Doesn’t mean she isn’t open to a COMPLEMENTARY relationship. Do you see the difference?

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Good! I’m glad. What Cathy notices is that as she’s going about her own self-discovery, several men have flashed her admirable smiles at the gun range. Then there’s the handsome instructor in acting class who complimented her last performance. She thinks he was working up the courage to ask her out, but lost his nerve. In short…not only does “Complete Cathy” meet and attract more quality men than “Incomplete Irene”, but she is more likely to attract a man who is complete. Men who are complete do NOT seek out incomplete women. In fact, men who are already complete are often REPELLED by an “Incomplete Irene”. This is important. Let me rephrase please.

This doesn’t mean that “Complete Cathy” will never run into or get involved with some scalawag. But this is more of an ‘isolated incident’ for Cathy…where it seems to be par for the course for Irene. I want you to find love. I want you to enjoy all of the fruits of a COMPLEMENTARY relationship. That’s why our paths have crossed. I just want you to know, if you don’t already, that you are a whole human being regardless of what the status says on your Facebook profile

When you feel like you need a relationship to be complete, you run the very real risk of attracting an INCOMPLETE man…or worse…a man who consciously or unconsciously is looking for an incomplete woman to take advantage of.

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HOMEWORK: You have done enough reading. Now it’s time to take some action. Make a list of the passions in your life and write down your answers to all of these questions: 1. If you could move anywhere in the world tomorrow where would you go? 2. Why? 3. If you had unlimited funds and never had to work again, what would you spend your life doing if you knew no one would ever judge you? 4. How do you want to be remembered? 5. What makes you unique?

By taking the time to answer these questions you are starting on the path to actually finding your true passion. Now make a list of 12 things you have always thought about doing, but have never actually done. This can be things like go camping, go to an open mic night and sing, go bungee jumping, climb a mountain, learn to mountain bike, play soccer, etc. Once you make that list of 12 things, I want you to try each of them just ONCE a month for the next year. That’s one day a month that you spend doing something you have always wanted to but spent too much time making excuses. It’s time to get to know yourself and to have some real adventures.

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You are dating the perfect man. He’s handsome, he’s successful (or has potential) and he loves to have a good time. He takes you out to amazing restaurants and you really think he could be the perfect husband and father, if only he would change just one little thing. He CHEATS on you all the time. It’s so easy to judge other women and say, “Why is she with him, he treats her like crap.” But when it’s us, for some reason we just can’t be objective. I’m going to let you in on a little secret here. There are tons of men who date the wrong women. It’s a two way street. The first time I thought I was in love it was with a girl who treated me terribly. We had to keep it a secret that we were dating and she cheated on my like crazy. She lied to me all the time and when I finally had unquestionable proof I said to her, “I don’t care who you sleep with, I will always love you.” That one sentence is the exact worst moment in my dating life. I know to the second when I hit the bottom of the barrel. As I was speaking I licked the bottom. This was a long time ago, but I want you to realize that you are not alone. Millions of women start dating the wrong guy every day. Instead of judging each other for our mistakes, we want to dig down and find out what causes us to make them and how to avoid them in the first place.

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Sometimes attraction feels like this raw power that you just can’t resist. It’s this powerful sexual force that you just can’t control. And men who understand the nature of female sexuality can play you like a violin. At the core of everything, attraction is directly in correlation to confidence. As much as we want to believe that there are other factors, it always boils down to confidence. The more a man believes in himself the more you are drawn to him.

BASE PRIME DIRECTIVE: Mate with a man who can handle whatever life throws at him, produce healthy, good looking babies, and elevate social status.

Women…YOU… are hard wired to respond to a confident man. Why? Because you are wired to survive! Much (but not all) of attraction is based on primitive survival instinct. Inside your brain a program is running that says ‘become aroused’ whenever a potential mate crosses your path who can handle whatever life throws at him, give you healthy, good looking babies and elevate social status. Obviously, this is the ‘reptilian’ part of the brain and I am not discounting the ‘higher functioning’ brain, but understanding BOTH brains is KEY to helping you find your faithful, RELIABLE man who EXCITES you at the same time. Let’s look at the ‘reptilian’ prime directive again. Let’s look at how this prime directive plays out in life. Do you like a man with a sense of humor? If you’re like 97% of women polled…the ability to make her laugh is one of the most desirable traits a man can possess. Is this the Prime Directive at work? Yes! A man who can laugh, find the humor in life and make you laugh is a man exhibiting a trait which signals your ‘reptilian brain’ that he’s got life by the balls. Ever wonder why so many women (maybe even you?) are attracted to the bartender or DJ at a nightclub? Even when it makes little sense ‘intellectually’? Prime directive at work again!

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Typically, the bartender or DJ is CONTROLLING the action within the current environment. If they are controlling the environment then they are the ones handling life within THAT environment. Mix in the fact that humor usually makes for good DJ’s and physically attractive bartenders increase profits for the nightclub and you have a potent prime directive cocktail Rock stars? Prime directive. Actors? Prime directive. Bad Boy? Prime directive. Let’s try a little exercise. I want you to tell me which of these two men you are more attracted to. The first man always tells you how lucky he is to be dating you. He can’t believe you chose him and he always says how much he doesn’t deserve you. He texts you fifty times a day. The second man acts like you are lucky that he’s dating you. He only texts you back after you send him five texts. Sometimes he ignores you and just goes out with the guys. I know you hate to admit it, but even I am more attracted to the second guy. Confidence is that sensual. It’s an unstoppable force. The problem is that confidence is often intertwined with a guy being a jerk. His level of self-confidence is much higher than it should be when compared to his successes in life. IMPORTANT POINT! What is a USEFUL definition of a jerk? A jerk is a man who appears confident, but has LITTLE or NO VALUES. In other words, a man who lights your fire because he satisfies your PRIME DIRECTIVE, but a man with LITTLE or NO Values. Do you see? Is there a light coming on? You are NOT attracted to jerks…per se. You are attracted to men based on your prime directive. It’s okay…nothing you can do…BUT…Here’s the secret… Date and attract men who fulfill your Prime Directive… BUT… arm yourself with some reliable tools to separate the men with a weak value system from the men with a strong sense of SHARED values. You CAN enjoy a life with a man who is exciting, adventurous AND won’t leave your side when life gets tough.

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This powerful sexual chemistry you have with the wrong man (men with little or NO shared values) is at the crux of why many women feel like JERK MAGNETS and end up in dead-end relationships. No matter how much we try to deny it, as humans we are not logical beings. We don’t make rational decisions in almost any aspect of our lives. It’s hard to ignore our passions and desires. If we were rational, we would all be in great shape, have the perfect job and have excess money in our emergency funds in our bank accounts. By understanding the nature of the chemicals coursing through your brain every time you see a sexually attractive man you can at least learn to guide those passions, if not begin to control them. These chemicals are triggered by your Prime Directive. It’s extremely beneficial for you to understand that what’s happening to you is largely biological SO that you can gain perspective and BEGIN to examine if this man who’s triggering these chemicals inside you is a man with values you share or is he a man with values almost in direct opposition to yours. Now since we aren’t even on our first date yet…let’s start with some PRELEMINARY tools. (Then as we progress through the cycles we’ll give you more to work with.) 1. Be a whole person in the present! Understanding that if you feel like you need someone to complete you (see phase 1) your odds of attracting and being attracted to a jerk skyrocket. The antidote is to be completely okay with the woman you are without a partner. Desiring a partner who is complementary is fine and is HEALTHY and is the foundation of making good decisions (even with all that chemistry bubbling) about whom you choose to spend the rest of your life with. 2. Become aware and conscious of how your Prime Directive affects you…

BASE PRIME DIRECTIVE: Mate with a man who can handle whatever life throws at him, produce healthy, good looking babies, and elevate social status.

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Please don’t discount this. Pay attention and use your feelings as a trigger for you to SEEK ANSWERS about his values. Just imagine if we for some reason didn’t know how babies came into being? World population would explode! By understanding our role in how babies are born we can make (somewhat) more rational decisions. Likewise… If you melt for almost every musician you’ve ever met…It’s extremely helpful to say to yourself… “Oh, this is MY prime directive kicking in! I better proceed with caution and determine if he’s a man with NO VALUES (jerk) or is he a man that has values that I share?” I really want you to understand this, let’s reverse this and look at it from a man’s point of view. When a man of VALUE meets a very attractive woman, he may have a conversation in his head like this:

“Whoa!” And that’s it! Just kidding When a man of VALUE recognizes HIS Prime Directive (more on his Prime Directive later) and he uses his chemical rush as a catalyst to SLOW DOWN AND BE CAUTIOUS.

If he could hear his HEART LIGHT…it might be saying… “I better make sure she is more than just a pretty face before I move forward.” 3. Get clear on WHAT values you desire in a lifelong partner and in what PRIORITY.

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Don’t confuse traits or characteristics like “a sense of humor” with values like honesty, family, hard work and loyalty. I’m not saying to live life with a man that is a bore, I am saying you can have adventure, romance AND a man who’ll stick by you through thick and thin…BUT you’ve got to get clear on what values are important to you.

In my experience, more break ups and divorce happen over PRIORITIES than values. Some couples share almost identical values, but often one or two or more priorities have caused World War III.

For example… A couple shares the following three values (to keep it simple):

 Family  Hard work  Religion But what if HER priorities were:

 Family  Religion  Hard work And his PRIORITIES?

 Hard work  Family  Religion

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Now imagine the holy hell unleashed if this was the 10th Sunday this year he missed church with his family because he had to spend it at the office? Do you see how Values and Priorities are something you want to be clear on BEFORE you enter a relationship?

HOMEWORK: Bet you can almost guess your homework? This is an important assignment because it will form the foundation for further exercises. 1. What top five values are important to you? 2. How would you prioritize those values?

Are you living these values and priorities now? And it’s okay if you’re not, it’s something to strive for…realize though…it’s hard(er) to find and attract a man living these same values when you’re still striving to reach them yourself. (We’ll talk more about this BIG SECRET later.)

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Every relationship begins with the first meeting. Without your first encounter there will be no second date, no relationship and no marriage. So in a way there is a lot of pressure on that first meeting. But what you really want to do is maximize the number of first meetings you have with the right kind of guy. So hopefully you did your homework above? The values and priorities you want to share form the foundation of your relationship. However… When choosing WHERE to start looking for your Mr. Right, we need to look and pick out some traits and do some VISIONEERING of our ideal guy. Let’s take a moment and pick out a list of traits you are looking for in the next man you date. The more we know about the kind of man you want to meet the better our chances of actually achieving that goal. You can be as specific as you want. The type of woman I date is extremely specific. I have a very long list of things I am looking for in a long-term partner. But that’s ok because in the modern world distance has almost no meaning, so we have access to tens of thousands of potential partners. Don’t you deserve the best? Of course you do! Right now, please make a list of exactly the type of man you are looking for. Describe him in as much detail as possible. I want you to take the time to write about his looks, his education, his hobbies, and anything else that is important to you. Do you want him to be religious? Love children? Have a certain income or career trajectory?

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This is not the time to be humble. This is the time to be honest. I will tell you the exact same thing I have shared with tens of thousands of men, the less honest you are with me the less success you will have. So be really honest about what you want, because I will help you achieve it. You can do it. Let’s think of this ideal man as your ‘ideal’ target. Now there are hundreds of men that fit what you wrote down. That’s what’s amazing about our world. You can be very specific and still not be limited for choice. We’ll show you how to attract him later. Now let’s think about the man you’ve picked. I’m going to give an example of a guy to illustrate this tactic. Let’s say, besides the values and priorities, you want a man who loves art, has a steady job and is looking for a long-term relationship. Where can this type of man be found? Since my entire career has been built around spending thousands of hours with every different type of man I can tell you exactly where to find this type of guy. Right now I am thinking of several dozen clients I have worked with. And ALL of them dragged me to art museums and galleries. We call this the Waterfall Characteristic because it brings all the other ones down the mountain with it. So from your lists start to look for the Waterfall Characteristic - that dominant factor. Look deeper into your list and find the characteristic that brings the most other traits you are looking for. And that will help you find the right place to go looking for a solid guy. Do you have a bit more of a refined taste? I can tell you that ideal places to meet this type of man are wine tastings, charity events and things of this nature. EXCELLENT TIP! You can also create a funnel to bring excellent men into your life. How? I have a friend from London who wanted to meet a woman with an appreciation for art, so he started a group for people who love art and once a month he has a showing in his house. He lets a new local artist hang pieces all over his house and then tons of people come over to see the work. He meets amazing men and women constantly. There is a principle of the law of attraction that really connects with finding the right type of man and bringing him into your life. Just by writing a list of the traits you are looking for, you will become more aware of men that meet your qualifications. … And the first step to meeting the right guy is finding an action that matches your desire. So thinking about small modifications in where you spend time is really powerful first step and is the beginning of where to start looking. You can be proud of yourself for each step you take. It helps to associate a positive emotion with doing something that will make your life better. If you want to meet athletic men there are tons of runners’ groups and sports leagues. I have two friends who are getting married that met in a kickball league.

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Yeah KICKBALL! An Ultimate Frisbee league offers a fun sport that’s not too competitive, so you can have a bit more fun. You really want to start doing these things because you enjoy them and that is what will draw more men into your life. You want to meet a man you can really connect with so try to find situations that are conducive to connecting. If you play in a kickball league and immediately go home after every game because you have work early the next morning, you are missing the primary time for connecting and chatting over pizza and beers.

This happened to my friend yesterday. He is a young, wealthy and successful entrepreneur who spends all of his free time trying to improve himself. He does everything from yoga to weekend retreats to business conferences. He recently shifted his focus and is looking for a long-term relationship. He’s pretty close to the perfect guy. At his yoga class yesterday there was a really cute girl on the mat next to him. He wanted to talk to her after class but he was worried about the social awkwardness of flirting in yoga class. So he didn’t start talking to her the second class ended. The girl ran out of class the moment everything ended, jumped in her car and drove off. She missed the opportunity to meet someone amazing because she provided no opportunities for him. She was in a group situation but she turned it into a solo event. And she has no idea. Conversation is the foundation of any relationship, so try to provide men with opportunities to meet you. Forgive my modesty, but I have an incredible ability of picking good men and women to work with in business and in life. I have an ability to see through facades and deep into someone’s CHARACTER. Good luck?

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Super powers of intuition? Nope. I’ve got CHARACTER GOGGLES. He’s passed now, but one of the most important lessons my Dad ever taught me was to never judge a man or woman by their cover…and NEVER judge by what they say, but make your judgments based on WHAT THEY DO and PAST behavior leaves clues. He taught me this in many small ways. For example…his only advice on picking a girl to date was this: “Always lock your car doors (before electric locks)…then always open the car door for your date…as you walk around the car…if she unlocks your car door…she’s a keeper…if she doesn’t unlock your door…she’s self absorbed and you shouldn’t offer her another date.” See, Pop…I was listening…thank you The foundation of this advice has saved me from countless hardships, agony and led to many wonderful relationships in life and business. I call this ‘super power’ my Character Goggles. I now pass them on to you. The foundation of the advice is this:

“Pay rapt attention to how people BEHAVE in general and BEHAVE towards others when they believe their actions have no consequences at the time.”

For example: It’s rare for me to work with someone on an important project before I take him or her out to lunch or dinner. Why? Because I want to see how this person BEHAVES towards the wait staff. Are they kind and courteous? Patient if things go wrong? If so…like my Dad would say… “They’re keepers.”

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If they are rude, impatient or just jerks to the wait staff over something as trivial as lunch, then that tells me volumes about how they’ll behave TOWARDS ME…and if the stakes are higher than lunch, I could really be in for a nasty surprise. Sporting events are good clues, especially if he’s actively participating, to see how he BEHAVES when things don’t go his way. If he loses a game, does he go silent and brood for hours? More than likely…given time this is EXACTLY how he’ll react when for some reason or other, you don’t give him his way. If you don’t have a physical scenario to ‘judge’ how somebody acts when they feel there are no consequences to their actions, the next best thing is… Have them tell you a story! Huh? Let me explain. Let’s say I am interviewing somebody and one of the traits they absolutely must have to be effective in the position is to be organized. Now, I can’t ask her to open her purse and let me see how it’s organized. And asking to see how tidy she keeps her car wouldn’t go over too well. What I can do is apply what I call a TRUTH SERUM STORY. Me: One of the qualities you must absolutely have is organization. Applicant: OH! That is me. I’m so organized people tell me I’m TOO organized sometimes. Me: That’s great…that sounds just like the type of person I’m looking for…tell me about a time when someone told you that you’re too organized. Then I sit back and listen patiently and intently. If she spits out a story at the tip of her tongue then I’ve got evidence of her character. I may follow up with… “Can you tell me of another time?” or “Tell me about a time when a project was in complete disarray and you stepped in.” However… If she trips over her own tongue and I give her plenty of time to come up with a story and she simply can’t, I’ve got evidence she was painting a rosy picture for me. How about we look at a truth serum story example applied to a relationship? Let’s pretend your father and mother divorced because he constantly put career over family even when there was plenty of money. You want to ensure the man you marry values family over career. You’re okay with career being important, but just not MORE important than family.

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Tricky to find out? Let’s see how we do with a truth serum story. You: Yeah, my mom and dad divorced when I was 13, mostly because Dad was away on business a lot and Mom wasn’t happy with that situation. (Make sure you keep your feelings out of the story or he may respond in the way he thinks is supportive of you…the way you’ve laid out the story, he can’t know if you ‘side’ with Mom or Dad.) Now this conversation could go any number of ways.

Scenario 1: Him: Sounds like your Dad was a workaholic? You: He was. What are your thoughts on men who are workaholics? Him: (Let’s say he talks at length, but this is the CONDENSED version.) I am big on career and believe a man should provide for his family, but he should put career second. Workaholism is taking it too far. You: That’s really interesting. Has there been a time in your career or education where you had to put family over career? Him: Yes, actually I was accepted at Stanford University across the country, but declined and decided to go to school here in Houston because my family is here. (Okay, great start.)

Scenario 2 Him: That’s too bad (and then silence.) You: Yeah, I’m sure it happens to many families. What are your thoughts on the career/family balance? Him: Well, it’s hard. As you know I went to Stanford which was all the way across the country. It was hard leaving my family, but I’ll have much more opportunity now. (In this case he tells you his PAST BEHAVIOR, which you absolutely should not discount. He is also TELLING YOU he favors the work side of the balance. He may be a great guy and you may really like him, but this is a warning sign his values are not congruent with yours.) We could run this scenario about a dozen ways, but do you understand what we are doing here? In absence of WATCHING behavior, we want them to paint a picture of PAST BEHAVIOR, which is our second best clue.

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In our society it is the man’s job to walk up to the woman and ask her out. Whether you think that’s right or wrong, or a little bit sexist, it’s simply the nature of our society. I ask men how they feel about this all the time. And in my experience about twenty percent of men consider it a deal breaker if a woman asks them out. And you really don’t have to worry about approaching men. If you make yourself available, men will walk up to you. If you are NOT getting enough men striking up conversations with you, it’s more than likely that you appear NON-approachable. The secret to having one conversation after another is BE APPROACHABLE.

There are a few really deep secrets about men that I am going to share with you here. Most men are terrified of groups of women. If you go to a bar with a couple of your good friends, the odds of a man approaching you drop dramatically. You immediately cut out every single guy who is even a little bit shy or private. Women love to be social and around their friends in public venues. But men don’t want to be in that situation.

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Most men live in fear of a public rejection. When a man sees you with your friends and wants to talk to you, in his mind he imagines a scenario where you reject him and shame him publicly. You say something mean and your friends laugh at him. Even though this scenario is not reality, the fear of it will keep a lot of amazing men from approaching you. I specifically work with men who want to overcome this fear, so I have a great deal of experience in this area. There are only a few types of men who will approach women in groups and most of these are the exact type of men you are trying to avoid. It takes either a great deal of confidence or arrogance to approach a group of women. So why turn the numbers against yourself? There is another challenge to approaching a group of women. You have to make all of them like you. The more women in a group translate to a higher chance of failure. At least in a man’s mind. There are dozens of reasons why men don’t approach groups of women, but it all boils down to fear and the greater level of difficulty. If you are in a group, he has to make all of them like him, deal with the risk of one of them being mean, deal with them placing social pressure on you not to flirt with him, etc. Men, like water, nearly always take the path of least resistance. I see this in myself every day. We always balance reward with effort when deciding what we want to do. Why would I work really hard to meet a woman who is surrounded by a wall of friends when I can walk up to a girl who is by herself, even if I find her slightly less attractive? Men want less effort. There is one other factor to consider about groups of women. This is something that men talk about all the time, especially when men are talking about dating. And this is the awful friend. Oftentimes in groups of women, there is one woman who believes it is her job to protect her friends from the advances of other men. This is usually the woman with the lowest dating value in the group. What I mean is, she is the woman least likely to have a man ask her out. Occasionally in a group this dynamic does reverse. I have seen situations where the prettiest girl will block all men from approaching the weakest girl in the group. This is usually done as a way of maintaining control over the friend. In both of these scenarios, one friend poisons the entire group. No matter what anyone says, you are most definitely judged by the company you keep.

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Just a few weeks ago I met a stunning, tall anesthesiologist at a club in Los Angeles. She was really into me and we started having a lovely conversation. Then this guy she was friends with came up and started talking about how he wanted his gravestone to say he was really generous with his coke. The guy was awful and I got out of there after that. Her bad friend was a big red flag for me. Please don’t be the awful friend. When I talk about attraction and looks later on you will discover that it’s her personality more than her looks or anything else that is crushing her relationship options. You might be this woman in your group. You feel it is your responsibility to protect your friends from making bad decisions. But at some point you need to start focusing on your own happiness. I can tell you personally that I have approached groups of women where the awful friend is the girl I was most attracted to. She was so busy trying to keep me from her friends that she had no idea I was actually interested in her. It doesn’t really affect me as I have a lot of dating prospects, but if she is doing this all the time, she is going to have trouble ever finding a boyfriend. This isn’t about digging at this personality type so much as giving you a little insight into the minds of men. In my personal experience this type of friend usually exists in only one out of every ten groups of women. But most men have no idea WHICH group out of the ten has an awful friend. As I mentioned earlier, I have even seen it where the most attractive woman in the group was the mean one. Men want to avoid social awkwardness almost as much as women do. So they will avoid all groups of women out of fear that they might have this type of woman in the group. This certainly isn’t a one-way street, there are plenty of groups of men that are awful. But I don't want to digress too much into group dynamics. The lesson here is that men are less likely to approach groups.

They also hate it when you are sitting down. I spend most of my life standing in bars watching nervous; high-quality men try to learn to be brave enough to talk to women in bars. The men I work with are all financially successful and extremely kind. They have hearts filled with love and just want to connect with a kind woman, like you want to connect with a kind man who treats you like the beautiful and amazing woman that you are.

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If you want you can replicate my experiment. Go out with a group of your girlfriends and stand near the bar. Count how many men walk up to you. Now go sit at a table. Then try sitting at a booth. The more physically challenging you make it, the less men are going to walk up to you. And you’re not just looking for men with a ton of approach confidence. You want to meet a guy with high relationship value, a guy who has a lot of good boyfriend qualities. So why make a guy have high short-term confidence in order to talk to you?

It’s very difficult to get into the minds of the opposite sex. Men are just as unaware of many of the intricacies of how women act in social settings. If a man goes out and has a pretty woman as a friend, women will be more attracted to him. If a woman goes out and has a guy friend with her, she is less attractive. Men are very competitive and tribal by nature and we don’t want to hunt on another man’s land. If men are intimidated by you going out with other women, imagine how they feel when they see you with a man. Men do not want to get punched in the face for hitting on the wrong women. It takes a really socially savvy man to avoid confrontation when he flirts with a woman who has a boyfriend. Just recently a friend of mine was hit from behind by a guy who didn’t want him flirting with a girl. My friend turned around and the guy pulled out a badge, so he couldn’t retaliate. My friend is as socially savvy as I am and has talked to thousands of women in public venues and this is the first time he ran into trouble. What can you do when a bad cop hits you? The point is not that clubs are risky and that men get into fights all the time. That is actually the only story I have about someone I know getting hit for flirting with a woman. But all men imagine that scenario when they see you out with a man in your group. It doesn’t matter if the man is your boss, your brother or your coworker – he’s killing your chances of meeting a nice guy. You don’t have to spend the rest of your life going to bars alone. But I do recommend taking the occasional walk around a bar or party by yourself. At least give nice guys a chance to walk up to you.

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And if you are best friends with a man I have some news for you. He is secretly in love with you. Your first instinct was to say that I’m totally wrong. But, I bet right now you can think of one incident where it got a little weird between you? Either on a trip, or a birthday, or a night out when you each had a few too many drinks. You have blocked out the memory because if you admit he tried to sleep with you, it will end the friendship. But it’s there. And when you go out he’s actively sending signals to men not to approach you. He believes that if he keeps enough men from talking to you, eventually you will see what’s right in front of your face. He’s trying to create the desert island effect. If he is the only option, suddenly he will become the best option. This type of guy is actually MORE likely to start a confrontation in a bar. A boyfriend who is secure in his relationship isn’t going to get worried because his girlfriend is chatting to someone while she is ordering a drink. It’s the nervous guy who knows that anyone can knock him out of the running that is going to get upset and cause a scene. I have seen that happen a lot. The weird awkward scene where a girl who just told me she is only friends with a guy and then he starts pulling her away from me and telling me it’s his girlfriend. It’s fine to have really close guy friends. You don’t need to end any friendships today. You just deserve to know how other men perceive this relationship. I know a lot about this situation and exactly what this guy is thinking. I am not this type of guy. But I used to be.

So now you are going out to more social events where you can find the type of men you want to date. You are taking the time to separate from the group more and more. This is all excellent progress. The other benefit about spending more time out and about alone is that it puts more pressure on you to talk to strangers and expand your social boundaries. If you are out with friends you can talk to them all night and have a great time and not start a single conversation with a stranger. But remember; right now that perfect guy is still a stranger! So you will have to chat with a few strangers to sift and find the perfect man.

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Did you ever watch I Love Lucy as a kid? This TV show was brilliant. This stay-at-home wife would get bored and always end up in some kind of incident. She would talk to everyone no matter their status. And this is a good thing because it would always involve her having an adventure and meeting new people. She would always end up in a situation.

What you want to bring into the mix is just chatting to other people all the time. Act Like Lucy! It doesn’t actually have to be to the man you are interested in. Talk to bartenders at bars. Talk to museum staff at art galleries. Talk to waiters. Talk to the referees at kickball. Even talking to women you don't actually know will increase your value to men. If a man sees that you are friendly to strangers it will help him get the confidence to walk up to you. When you Act Like Lucy you will also help provide opportunities for incidents. Have you ever been talking to the checkout girl at the grocery store and the person behind you chimes in? That’s the type of situation you want to create. I am a professional dating coach, so meeting women when I’m out and about is a major part of my life. I’m always talking to people and doing research. I ask men and women about their relationships all the time, because I always want to improve my material. I work very hard to be sure that everything I teach my men or my women is practical, not theoretical. It’s amazing to me how often men I don’t know try to ride my coat tails. I have seen a guy watch a woman in a bar for two hours trying to get up the nerve to talk to her. As soon as he sees me walk up, he suddenly gets the courage. Once he sees her talking to a stranger, a switch flips in his mind. The theoretical became practical. He now knows for a fact that she talks to strangers. Before that moment he wasn’t sure. As strange as that may sound to you, that is a huge part of a man’s thought process. A lot of men don’t think it’s ok to talk to women in bars. So they need some kind of proof that it’s all right. So you want to give me a lot of opportunities and chances. When you go to the bar to order a drink, always stand near a group of men. When you go to the bathroom go by yourself. These two steps will increase how many men start conversations with you by a huge amount. And all you are doing is providing opportunities for something to happen. As a woman you don’t have to work as hard to create incidents. If you Act Like Lucy and are friendly to strangers and are in the vicinity of a man (if he can see you) then you have done your part.

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As a final note, there is the possibility that you have a mean face. This has nothing to do with your level of beauty. It has to do with your face’s neutral look. Do people always ask you what’s wrong or if you’re upset? Then you may have a face that looks negative to people, even when you are in neutral. I have dated several girls like this and it can be a big barrier to meeting new people. You aren’t doing anything wrong; it’s actually a case of people misinterpreting your sub communications. That’s a really complex way of saying they think you’re mad when you’re not.

A lot of people have a natural one percent smile all the time. But just as many people have a one percent frown. It’s genetics not mood or disposition. But people will interpret a tiny frown as a giant shield. I am friends with several beautiful women who intimidate men away for this very reason. They always look angry and unapproachable, when in fact they are really friendly and lovely to talk to. When they are just standing around they look intimidating, but as soon as they start chatting with people, they can show off their amazing personalities. So there are a lot of benefits to meeting people as you are out and about enjoying social events. You should enjoy the journey as much as you enjoy the destination. You may very well start chatting to the old fat umpire at a kickball game and then he introduces you to his nephew the young handsome doctor. Life is full of surprises, so the more opportunity you create the more likely something really amazing will come your way.

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This is a topic that is really terrifying to discuss. Our society has become so superficial that everyone feels ugly. It’s this kind of mass confusion that is the result of just too much television telling us what is attractive. And making most of us feel like it’s not us. I am going to be extremely honest and extremely personal here because I think this lesson is one of the most important sections of this book. Your concept of beauty is wrong. Hollywood and magazines have lied to you. All those women’s magazines that say they are trying to help you have a better life are covered with pictures of models. It’s a psychological mixed message. And it’s false. Beauty is not objective. It is subjective. Every single man has a different ideal woman. I talk to men about the women I am attracted to all of the time. Because the type of woman I like physically is extremely rare. Every man has something specific that he really likes. And it’s always different. So let me tell you what I like in a woman. I love women who have big shoulders and really wide eyes. When a girl looks like a praying mantis then I am extremely attracted to her. To a large segment of the population this is not an attractive look. But I think those people are all idiots. I know what I am attracted to and I really don’t care what other men think. And when I say big shoulders, I mean that I look at a girl’s waist to shoulder width ratio. I think there is something really beautiful about a girl with specific proportions and I think it has a lot to do with the Golden Mean, which is a ratio found in a lot of ancient construction. You might think that I am making this up, but if you look at the last book I wrote for men I had a chapter on this same topic. It’s ok to be attracted to what you like. The world is a beautiful place with many different types of people. There are enough to go around. I have dated models and singers and actresses and other women that are stunning in their own way. But I will tell you right now that nothing scares me more than a girl with praying mantis features. This is the one type of woman I get really nervous about talking to. I will be in a bar or a club or walking through the mall and when I see one of these rare girls my heart starts racing. I was once in a bar in Hawaii and it took me three hours to get the nerve to approach a girl that not one other man talked to all night. And I was so nervous that I got all awkward and it just didn’t go well.

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The point is not to tell you what I am attracted to. What I want you to see is that no matter what you look like, there is a man out there who is super attracted to your type. The irony is that men aren’t allowed to tell women what we really like if it strays from the official decisions from Hollywood on what is beautiful. Can you imagine if I told you I loved your Praying Mantis face? You would be super offended, even though I’m expressing that I think you are crazy beautiful. Our society limits men as much as women. I’m not going to lie to you and say that looks don’t matter. They do matter. Just not as much as you think and really they don’t work the way that you think they do. I know men who only like women who look like animals. I know men who only like women who are left-handed and about a million other variations. So please realize that there is a man out there right now who thinks you’re as beautiful as it gets. And I’m going to help you find him.

3 Ways to Increase Your Attractiveness WITHOUT Changing Your Looks Smile & Laugh – Men are hard wired to want to please you. When you laugh WITH us your hotness gets even hotter. Eye Contact – The best compliment you can give a man is said with your eyes. We like it! We love it! We want MORE of it! Share a Small Foible – This creates almost IMMEDIATE INTIMACY. Share a minor flaw about yourself, do it ‘confession’ style. Guard against TMI and keep the flaw minor. Do those 3 things and you’ll hold his attention prisoner when you’re near him and he won’t be able to stop thinking about you when you’re not.

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There are a lot of women who are just stunning. That’s reality. But being really physically attractive is a double-edged sword. Because these women have a larger pool of men to choose from, several important sociological things happen. The first thing we need to realize is that most men won’t approach women above a certain level of beauty. It might be crass to say it this way, but this is how men think. We say that sevens get approached more than anyone else.

Men want to date women of above-average beauty…but not too far above it. I could delve into the nature of why seven is such a popular number in many aspects of life, but what this means on a deeper level is that really stunning women rarely get approached by nice guys. Those women mostly meet men of extremely high confidence, whether it’s deserved or not. Just like being in a group, or frowning or sitting down in the back of a big booth, beauty becomes a barrier to many men approaching. There is also a rumor going around in our society that better looking women are meaner, dumber or have worse personalities. I grew up completely believing this rumor. I think it has to do with people saying that less attractive women have good personalities. In my personal experience people are friendly or awful despite their appearance, not because of it. But most men have this flawed assumption and it keeps nice guys from walking up to those beautiful women. These women tend to attract a large group of low-commitment men. Men whose primary attraction trigger is looks are rarely boyfriend material. I have a lot of friends like this and in my experience they have the shortest relationships and cheat the most. These women tend to have access to the types of men who have many options and because these men have such a large pool of options, they give individual relationships a lower value. Just look at how often Hollywood marriages fail. If you are an extremely beautiful woman, this book is designed to help you sift through all of those men to find the ones that have high relationship value and still excite you. These men exist and we are going to find them!

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I have a friend from East Germany named Alida. We worked together and were good friends years ago when I was working in Japan. I never found her physically attractive and there was no sexual chemistry between us. I am able to be objective about this story. Once Alida decided she wanted a man, it became inevitable. Whether it took weeks or months eventually that man would be dating her. And he would think it was completely his idea. Alida is married with twins now and she is really happy, but back then, she was able to get any guy that she wanted. It wasn’t even based on high self-confidence. She didn’t think she was beautiful at all. So it wasn’t looks. It was the power of her personality. She grew up behind the wall in East Berlin. She never thought she would be allowed to leave her neighborhood, let alone the country. So, she had a love of life and freedom that was so powerful it just drew men in. The only reason nothing ever happened between me and Alida was because she never willed it. I firmly believe that if she wanted to, she could have made me want her. I still think she’s one of the most amazing and wonderful people I have ever met in my life.

So please don’t worry about your looks right now or waste time worrying about what other people have or don’t have. We are going to develop the same tools that Alida has. You are going to be able to draw in any man as we build up your confidence!

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I would love to use a really cool metaphor here about Texas Hold ‘Em poker and look super cool, but I don’t play poker so I don’t know any cool metaphors. But I do know a little card game called Pokemon. Pokemon is a Japanese word made up of two English words, pocket and monster. So a Pokemon is a little monster you keep in your pocket. In Pokemon you need to have a lot of powerful cards to defeat your enemy. Even one really powerful monster can be defeated by twenty weak monsters. Imagine if one hundred kindergarteners attacked you; you might be bigger and stronger but their numbers would overwhelm you. If you are playing against someone with the most powerful card in the deck, but you have 20 cards, you will win. As we delve into this crucial section, always remember to keep your Pokemons, your deck of cards, in your pocket. This is a lesson that I have to teach my men over and over again. It’s not about how many points you have in one category; it’s about your total score. Looks are just one category. Men and women only score each other on a scale of one to ten. So nobody gets more than ten points for looks. Ever. It’s just the nature. There are a lot of other cards in the deck. So let’s take a little time to really delve into what makes you amazing. Relationships and dating are all about sales. If you want someone else to buy the product you have to believe in it first! And believe me you are already demonstrating a very valuable quality just be reading this book. Some of the many categories that make women attractive to men are:

             

Intelligence Sense of Humor Height Love of Travel Compassion Love of Sports Wealth Desire to Self-Improve Speak Foreign Languages Fearlessness Sportiness Passion Low-maintenance Confidence

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There are actually dozens and dozens of traits, or Pokemon, that individual men are attracted to. So what I would like you to do right now is make a list of all the things about you that are amazing or interesting. Take a few minutes to look at yourself in a different way. You can even ask your friends to help you fill in this category. This exercise will help you build your confidence and it will also show you what you want to let men know about you when they meet you. Right now, there is a man out there reading one of my books about how to meet the perfect girlfriend making a list describing her. And his list looks exactly like yours.

There is no need to overcomplicate things when you are just starting a relationship. You have to realize that most men are awful at relationships, so at a certain point we do expect some guidance from our women. The first time you see a guy you like, just try saying hello. You don’t have to put a lot of pressure on that first interaction. Just take baby steps. Maybe swap phone numbers and your first date can be a group date. You can even do a little Facebooking. This will allow you to see what his friends are like and what he looks like all year round. The important thing to remember is that a lot of quality men are actually awful at dating. I work with them every day. You wouldn’t believe how many nice guy millionaires have simply no idea how to ask women out. Most men have zero idea if you are attracted to them. Women have dozens of signals they send men to show that they are interested, but men have less than ten. That means that most men will never recognize your subtle signals. Men in our society need to focus on approaching. Actually getting up the nerve to walk up to a woman and ask her out is very difficult the majority of men. Fortunately, as a woman your role is to provide opportunities. In my research I have discovered that the women who complain about not getting asked out are also the women who never provide opportunities for men to ask them out.

You just need to give a man a lot of opportunities to ask you out. A few minutes alone can go a long way. A lot of men in your social circle and at work will be too afraid to let you know they are interested. If a guy in your social circle asks you out and is then rebuffed, he will be ashamed and embarrassed for a while. But you can create situations where just the two of you are hanging out. It’s the same for men from the workplace. They don’t want to get fired for sexual harassment, so even if your dream man is in love with you, he won’t say a word.

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As a woman you don't have to ask the man out, you just have to provide opportunities where he can flirt with you in a safe environment. Our society has shifted a lot to protect women in the workplace, and this is great, but now it’s the nice guys and lovely ladies who only know how to meet people at work who suffer. Just remember, if you always walk out of the office with the same group of girls, no man from work will ever ask you out. Men are just as afraid of social embarrassment as you are. Men are looking for overt signs of attraction from you or an all-clear signal to know that you won’t make it awkward if they ask you out. If you are really willing to take some big steps, you can invite a man you like out to simple social events to give him more opportunities.

Just saying, “Some of us are going for a drink after work, wanna join us?” can go a long way. As cliché as it sounds, a lot of men are waiting for that specific invitation. There are so many advantages to taking a man out of the usual situation and putting him somewhere casual and less stressful. Almost all men have a crush on at least one woman at work. And nearly none of them act on it for fear of reprisal. So put men in low stress situations and test the waters. You might just find what you are looking for.

It’s time to take some action and actually ALLOW men to ask you out. I want you to go out at least once a week for the next month. You can go to bars or cafes or art galleries or wherever you want. But you are going to go alone. I know this is a HUGE step and it feels like I just kicked you out of the nest, but you are going to make huge advances as a woman and as a person if you take this action. You will learn a lot about yourself and of course men will finally be able to ask you out. You should be proactive. Smile at every man who looks at you. Just allow the universe to show you how amazing it can be. By being open to the possibility of meeting someone nice, something wonderful will start happening for you. It’s also really powerful to learn that you actually can go out by yourself and have a nice time. As Travis talked a lot about earlier, you need to be a complete person before you start a big relationship. And what better way to flex your self-confidence muscles than by spending a little time getting to know you?

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End of "TRIAL" Chapters

Obtain the Complete Program

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Table of Contents What is the Venus Factor............................................................................................................................4 Your New Venus Family........................................................................................................................9 Balance................................................................................................................................................12 Gender Differences In Metabolism..........................................................................................................14 Size Difference....................................................................................................................................14 Body Composition...............................................................................................................................15 Leptin...................................................................................................................................................18 Nutrition Science......................................................................................................................................24 Eat-Up Days vs Cheat Days................................................................................................................24 Disinhibited Eating – 'Good Food' vs 'Bad Food' Thinking Must Go.................................................27 Hot Button Foods................................................................................................................................30 What Should I eat?..............................................................................................................................31 Soy.......................................................................................................................................................31 Sugar....................................................................................................................................................31 Artificial Sweeteners...........................................................................................................................32 Beverages............................................................................................................................................33 Carbohydrates AKA "Carbs" - 4 calories per gram.............................................................................35 Fats - 9 calories per gram....................................................................................................................36 Protein - 4 calories per gram...............................................................................................................37 Meal Timing and Meal Frequency......................................................................................................38 Ego Depletion......................................................................................................................................40 A special note about coffee..................................................................................................................42 Calories.................................................................................................................................................... 44 Deficit vs Maintenance........................................................................................................................44 Metabolic Rates...................................................................................................................................46 Tapering Up Calories...........................................................................................................................49 Weight vs Shape.......................................................................................................................................51 Thinner Isn’t the Only Answer............................................................................................................53 What Determines Your Shape?............................................................................................................54 2


The Golden Proportion........................................................................................................................57 The Venus Index Measurements.............................................................................................................. 59 Ideal Waist (Height-to-Waist Ratio)....................................................................................................60 Waist-to-Hip Ratio (WHR)..................................................................................................................63 Shoulder-to-Waist Ratio......................................................................................................................65 How to Take Your Measurements.......................................................................................................67 Venus Index Measurement Example Guide........................................................................................68 Metabolic Flexibility & Adaptability..................................................................................................71 12-Week Undulating Metabolic Override Program.................................................................................72 Weeks 1-2 : 5 & 1 Protocol.................................................................................................................72 Weeks 3-4 : Undulation #1 - High Fat 2&1 protocol..........................................................................72 Weeks 5-6 : 5 & 1 Protocol.................................................................................................................73 Weeks 7-8 : Undulation #2 - High Protein 2&1 Protocol...................................................................73 Weeks 9-10 : 5 & 1 Protocol...............................................................................................................73 Weeks 11-12 : Undulation #3 High Carb 2&1 Protocol......................................................................74 The Venus Factor Virtual Nutritionist...................................................................................................... 76 Using The Venus Factor Virtual Nutritionist.......................................................................................76 Inputs...................................................................................................................................................77 Outputs................................................................................................................................................78 Supplements ............................................................................................................................................81 References................................................................................................................................................84

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What is the Venus Factor The Venus Factor is a complete weight loss and body re-shaping system. The components that make up the entire system are as follows: 1. Main diet and weight loss manual (this document). 2. The 12-week workout system - this includes a library of instructional exercise videos and complete 12-week workout system that can be done at home or in a gym. 3. The Venus Factor Virtual Nutritionist - this is a software app that calculates your specific calorie and protein requirements for weight loss specific to your body measurements. 4. The Venus Community - A private online community exclusive for Venus Factor members only. You can meet and learn from other Venus members, start your own personal blog within the community, or just browse other members' blogs and forum for information. Your level of involvement is your choice. 5. The Venus Index Podcast - Where you can listen to other Venus members tell their weight loss success stories. Every year we host 3 transformation contests and I interview all the winners to get the real inside story on how they used the Venus Factor system to fit their life and challenges to achieve their weight loss and body shape goals.

Theoretically you can lose all unwanted weight using only the dietary tools you will find here. In other words, if you never want to workout you don't really have to. However I rarely recommend this approach as your results will be both accelerated and optimized with the addition of physical activity. This is why we've included the 12-week Venus Factor workout system for you. Getting in shape, or rather, changing the size and shape of your body is a two part process.

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Part 1 is weight loss and fat removal. This part is almost entirely dictated by your nutrition and diet. You can lose all the weight and fat that you want if you have the right dietary approach. This system provides that dietary approach not only to lose the fat but also to keep it off. This second point about 'keeping it off' cannot be stressed enough. Many different diet programs can cause temporary weight loss. However the methods of most diets is to 'crash' you into the weight loss, putting your hormonal, psychological, and physical systems out of balance which leads to a stalling of weight loss and eventual rebound weight gain. This weight regain pushes your system even further out of balance. We've studied this problem and developed a solution that allows for weight loss without crashing and most importantly without the rebound weight gain. This system should be the last one you ever need as it's designed to produce as close to permanent weight loss as possible.

Part 2 is body and muscle shaping and toning. You have a unique body structure and shape that is largely determined by two factors: i) the location and amount of fat you have on your body ii) the shape and size of your muscles

And, while it is true that much of your natural shape comes from your genetics much of the way you store fat and build muscle is within your control. We've already discussed that the diet portion of this system will be used to remove the fat off of your body (nutrition and diet component). The second part of this system is how you can change the shape of your body by changing the shape and tone of your muscles (workout component). Some people will remove the fat from their body and be perfectly happy with the natural shape and tone of their muscles and will not want to, or need to do any exercising for muscle tone or shape. In my experience this is less common as most women want to work on certain areas of their body.

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The look and shape of your body is entirely within your control to change as you wish. You can take fat off where you want, and you can shape and tone any muscles you want. For example many of our past successful Venus's have lost all the body fat they wanted to lose, and then turned their focus to working on specific muscles to complement their new leaner form. Many found that they wanted to work on building their butt, and our program provides the tools to do this. Others find that once they lost their weight they needed to work on their shoulders and arms citing that they already had strong firm legs but needed their upper body to come into balance. Others still wanted a whole body workout that provides balance, shape and muscle tone to their entire figure. All cases can easily be done with this program. Overall the Venus Factor system is designed to be the simplest approach possible to achieving fat loss while also providing a workout program for developing and shaping muscle in a manner that is specific to a woman's body. A major consideration that went into the production of this program was practicality. In other words, this program had to also fit within a busy modern life. I fully believe you can have the body you want without having to sacrifice your social life to get it. After all, what would be the point of getting into great shape if you can never reap the social benefits of that new shape!? Too many trainers and fitness coaches teach their clients to treat their diet and workout like a 'second job'. Are you kidding me?! I don't even want a 'first job' let alone a second one! The vast majority of women who want to lose weight simply do not have 6 to 8 extra hours a day to dedicate to this endeavour. Heck, for most people even carving out 1 hour takes some rearranging and schedule juggling.

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My view of the Venus Factor is this: The Venus Factor System is the essential diet and fitness tools you need to get the body you want, while still being able to enjoy your life to its fullest. My goal with this program is to simplify the process rather than overcomplicate it. No doubt if you tried other diet or workout programs you already have many different diet and fitness 'rules' floating around in your head that you will not see come up in this program. In fact one of your first challenges will be accepting how simple this program really is. And I can assure you it's pretty simple. At this time it's worth making a distinction between 'simple' and 'easy'. This program just like any other diet or fitness program will have some challenges for you, some won't necessarily feel 'easy' but they will be 'simple'. For example, a push up is a 'simple' movement, but it may not necessarily feel 'easy' the first time you try it. Likewise eating a bit less sugar or fat is a 'simple' concept, but it may not feel 'easy' in the moment. So to be clear I've made this as 'simple' as possible, but sometimes it won't necessarily feel 'easy'.

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Beth Hill – The Venus Mindset I do want to offer a huge thank you to YOU! It was discovering YOU through MFP that led me to the Venus Index and I haven't looked back. You have created such a beautiful transformation and I am simply in awe of you! My 12 weeks ends today and I am so thrilled with the changes that have occurred in my life - physically, emotionally, and spiritually! As a tall woman, my biggest fear was always becoming big and tall. It has now happened twice in the recent years and it feels absolutely horrible. At this point in my life, I truly don't see it ever happening again. I have no reservations and am committed to going forward! Beth Hill

Like everyone else, I have tried it all and struggled to make anything work

long term. VI is the answer I have been looking for. It's not prepackaged. It's not a pharmaceutical secret. It's not a list of rules. It's not a temporary fix. It's not a fraud preying on human weakness for financial gain. It is the ease of eating the foods I choose to eat on a smaller scale and simply challenging my muscles more and more. It is not eating when I'm not hungry and budgeting my calories for when I do want to eat. It is not fitness for the physically fit - it is fitness to create fitness. It is a personal commitment with no strings attached.

The biggest surprise for me has been my spiritual and emotional transformation. I am experiencing and enjoying an unfamiliar joy - I can only describe it as being "high on life!" I am not sad, angry, grumpy or tired anymore. My self-esteem, motivation, and optimism have been recharged. I am Beth again and that feels really good. I truly feel that the best years of my life are ahead of me. The added benefit of connecting with and developing friendships with so many likeminded women on VI has been an added bonus and such a blessing. You led me to an amazing place Roberta and, because of that YOU will always be a part of my story. Thanks so much! You are loved! Beth

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Your New Venus Family I'm writing this part to make sure you're going into this program with open honest eyes about what it is and what you can expect from it. You can have it all, you can lose all the weight and fat you've ever hoped for and you can change the look and shape of your body however you wish. And one of the best ways to get started is to talk to the Venus's in the community. You can talk to many of our previous Venus transformation contest winners in the community and learn exactly how they did it. They'll be more than happy to share. You can also listen to their podcast interviews and absorb all of their insight and wisdom of how they managed to overcome their own personal struggles along the way to getting their Venus body. Everyone will have their own personal path to follow and I guarantee there is a Venus who has already done it that can help you with your personal challenges. Venus members are always willing to help, many of the previous successful Venus's will take new Venus's under their wing and coach them through the process. Some form tight bonds with a few others and create txt messaging accountability friendships. Others find local Venus's in their area and actually meet each other in person to chat about the process, go for walks together and even workout together. I've personally travelled to meet up with different Venus's and we've organized meet ups in various locations (Las Vegas being a crowd favorite) and there is always another meet up around the corner. In short, there is a wealth of experience, information, support, and friendship waiting for you in the Venus community, all you need to do is introduce yourself and join the discussion. If you're not a 'forum user' then you can just poke around and read for awhile, no need to start chatting if you're not 100% comfortable at first. The women of the Venus community are your new partners and team that will support you throughout the process of getting to your weight loss and fitness goals. Many have built lasting friendships that have transcended the community and turned into real life friendships. The community is waiting with open arms for you whenever you're ready to be a part of it. And to be clear, this is a secure community that is only available to active Venus Factor members, nobody else can read or access it.

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Podcast Interviews As I mentioned already, most of our past Venus transformation success stories have done a podcast interview with me to reveal exactly how they achieved their weight loss and body shaping goals. There is priceless information in each of these interviews and you can listen to them all for free just by visiting our blog at www.venusindex.com You can also find the podcast on itunes or whatever podcast aggregator you use by searching for 'venusindex'.

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Roberta Saum - The Venus Mindset To me the Venus Mindset is a lifestyle that is about taking ownership and responsibility for my own health. It is a belief that I can be healthy, lean, fit, muscular, and athletic within a mostly sedentary society that contains an overabundance of food. The odds of achieving this are against us in our society so it takes a strong and aggressive mindset to achieve this level of fitness and keep it. It is a lifelong mindset. You need to be an outlier and do things differently from everyone else. The Venus Ideal goals were mostly part of the weight loss phase and gave me the weight range and shoulder and waist circumference to shoot for. Having a realistic and tangible goal was a key for staying on track and knowing I was headed in the

Roberta Saum

right direction. It’s time to forget about what my scale weight is. It’s time to not worry about what my waist measurement is. It’s time to enjoy the new me and the new clothes that still fit. It’s time to enjoy being physically active and participate more in enjoying life. It’s time to listen to what everyone in my family and society is telling me, “Wow you have an amazing physique and are so fit and healthy. How did you do that?” I’m learning to enjoy life a little more. This is something I can do for the rest of my life. It’s my new life. It’s the Venus life.

Roberta Saum

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Balance This program is also about balance, both internally and externally. We fully expect you to have a balanced life between career/school, family, friendships, relationships, hobbies and getting the body you want. It's not an either/or situation. You should not, and will not have to put your life on hold to change your body. Any program that teaches you this sort of extreme action is doing something (and likely many) things wrong.

Internal & External Balance The concept of balance starts with internal balance of your body from a metabolic and hormonal level, extending to a balance of your bodyfat levels and muscle, to a balance of your upper body and lower body proportions. I want you to get away from extreme thinking in black and white terms. There is too much of this sort of thinking in diet and fitness and it leads to significant stress over the process and I believe this stress is the root of the failure that most women experience from dieting. You'll find that I leave out many diet and fitness industry 'rules' about eating because I've learned they're simply not necessary and add stress to a process that is already stressful enough. What is left in this program are the essentials, just the tools that you need to succeed. In the following section you'll learn about the major gender differences in metabolism and body composition, and why the Venus Factor is designed for women specifically. You'll see that when the systems of your body are out of balance it leads to difficulty losing weight. From there I'll explain how the program works to correct any imbalance and put you back in an optimal state to both lose your unwanted bodyfat and keep it off.

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Res from the UK As a 30 year old working mother I do not have time to waste. I do not have room in my head or my schedule for a hundred complicated diet and fitness mantras with which to punish myself on a 24/7 basis. At this point you may well say, “Then you can forget about getting a better body. THAT’S a job in of itself!” Hey, I’m a modern woman and we like to ‘have it all’ right? Luckily with Venus this

Res from the UK

becomes a realistic possibility.

I joined Venus in January 2013. In 4 short months, I have achieved my best look since pre-pregnancy, all whilst holding down two clinical placements and finishing my graduate studies with a First. How did I do it? *Clears throat* easily. Yes, truly. I worked out no more than 3 times a week, I did zero cardio. In truth I hung out like the Venus de Milo herself spending weekends in Paris, Rome and London, sampling all the delicious fare these places have to offer. In short I lived my life. The diet travels. For me the Venus Mindset is one of true adaptability. The Venus solutions become a part of your life, they don’t take over. Venus is not a one trick pony. I may be high maintenance but the diet and programs are not. There was no fuss, no nightly planning, and no ‘falling off’ the diet. There was really no diet in the traditional sense to fall off of. A Venus is adult enough to make her own food choices and mature enough to hold responsibility for them. A Venus doesn’t sit home sipping water and eating steamed veggies on a Saturday night. She’s out on the town at the best restaurants, in the best dress, enjoying herself. The Venus lifestyle is one of commitment. But one that is joyfully made given the overwhelming physical returns. For just a little consistency you get a lot of progress. The flexibility of the lifestyle makes it easy to side-step all the old diet blocks of more restrictive and complicated diet and training regimes. Res from the UK

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Gender Differences In Metabolism Men and women are different, this should be obvious at first glance. However, many people never stop to consider that the things that make men and women different on the outside, come from the inside.

Size Difference There are some rather obvious differences in men and women from a metabolic standpoint. The first is that men in general have more lean body mass than women and as a result men can eat more calories than women while still maintaining a leaner body. I've often been out for dinner and noted that the serving sizes of food at a typical restaurant seem to be 'calibrated' for men. In other words, the portion served fits fine for me, but seems to always be too much for a woman who might be dining with me. It's a bit unfair that I can simply eat what is served while she will have to leave some on the plate if she is concerned at all about managing her calorie intake. The alternative would be a world of portion sizes 'calibrated' for women where she could eat what is served and be perfectly satisfied without having to leave any food on her plate and I would have to order double the amount to be satisfied. It's a matter of perspective, but the latter case would be much more effective for weight loss as it's much easier to simply eat what is served to you compared to exerting the willpower to leave food on your plate. Ok that is enough about the general size difference of men and women. The next big difference is how testosterone and estrogen affect our bodies.

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Body Composition Estrogen is what makes you a woman and testosterone is what makes me a man. Women and men alike have a normal healthy and important circulating level of both of these hormones. Your estrogen levels are much higher than the small amount a man would have, and likewise a man's testosterone level is much higher than your normal health levels. Gender differences in estrogen and testosterone levels are what dictate the difference we see in the normal healthy ranges of body composition between men and women. The normal body composition range for men is between 10%-20% bodyfat and for women is 20%30%. Critically low bodyfat for men is approximately 3%, whereas for women critical low is approx 13% (as indicated by the appearance of potentially dangerous metabolic abnormalities). Clearly there is a difference in the general normal body composition of men vs women. A man can be at or below 10% bodyfat and look healthy and lean. A women achieving this level of bodyfat would actually look abnormal, sickly, and if enough muscle mass is on her body she will look overly masculine. In my experience working with many different women I've found that a lower bodyfat limit of approximately 16% - 18% is as low as most women will ever want to go and still maintain a feminine look. Anything below 20% is considered 'athletic/elite' for women. To contrast this with men, a bodyfat % of approx 8-10% would be necessary for a man to be viewed as athletic/elite. These body composition differences are due to the effect testosterone and estrogen have on our ability to store and burn fat. This is totally normal and no reason for concern, it's simply why you are shaped like a woman and I am not. The take home message is not to compare your bodyfat percentage to that of a man (if you're thinking in terms of bodyfat at all). Your target healthy range is between 20%-30%. Most of our Venus transformation contest winners arrive at their best figure anywhere between 18%-22%. Your specific best/happiest/healthiest look will 15


be unique to you. We cannot predict with certainty what your bodyfat % will be when you arrive at the look you are happiest with, but my guess is it will be somewhere close this range of 18-22%. This is important: The goal is not 0% bodyfat, nor is it to reach a predetermined level of bodyfat because you think this is the number you should have. The goal is to create a body you love and are proud of. Mostly likely this will end up somewhere around the range of 18-22% bodyfat. Let's do a brief summary of the gender differences we've talked about so far. 1. We know that you have more estrogen and less testosterone than men. It's what makes you a woman, and it also determines what your lower healthy bodyfat range will be. 2. You generally have less lean body mass than a man and therefore do not burn as many calories on a daily basis 3. Because of point 1 and 2 men can generally eat more calories than women and maintain a somewhat leaner body

The next most important gender difference when it comes to fat loss is with the hormone leptin.

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Lisa Barban Etwell – The Venus Mindset The Venus Mindset and what it means to me. If I were to put the Venus mindset into one word it would be EMPOWERMENT. Cutting out the static is critical in being a successful Venus. Having the knowledge that calories are king for fat loss/maintenance and that lifting heavy things builds shape is like owning a huge set of ear plugs protecting our ears and minds from the constant noise, myths, confusion and untruths being fed to us through the media and diet/fitness communities. Another form of empowerment is the right to choose. You get to decide whether you want your current shape or the shape of your choice. How? By lifting heavy things. Lisa Barban Etwell

You get to decide whether you want your current body fat levels or ones that are less/more. How? By deciding how many calories you eat.

Bottom line - YOU get to decide - and when you take the control and power of your own body back from those that hijack your goals - that is power. That is freedom. So.. what is the Venus mindset? Empowerment. Choice. Freedom. That doesn't mean it's easy. But it does mean that you ultimately have all the power in the world to make ANYTHING happen.

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Leptin Leptin is a signalling molecule that is released from your fat cells that is typically described as the master hormone regulating fat loss, due to the fact that is more or less released in proportion to the amount of fat you have on your body. The more fat, the more leptin (Owecki M. et al. 2010). This however leaves out all of the other roles it plays, and it can actually be seen as a master signalling hormone that is involved in the regulation and signalling of bone density, metabolic rate, fat mass, cognition and memory, inflammation, taste and sweetness perception, insulin sensitivity, and even the pathogenesis of skin tags (Moran CN et al. 2011, de Boer TN et al. 2012, Horio N et al. 2010, El Safoury et al. 2010) As you can see, leptin plays a significant role in many different systems of your body, and it's especially important to fat loss and overall appetite regulation. Leptin is produced and released by bodyfat and one of its many duties is to signal your brain to the amount of fat on your body. It is also released in response to eating and tells your brain how much food you've just ingested. It also responds to exercise intensity and duration, as well as the amount of chronic inflammation in your body (Suzukawa M et al. 2011). In other words, any typical diet intervention and/or exercise routine will stimulate a response in leptin. Since you have at least twice as much leptin as a man, your specific diet approach needs to be nuanced and designed to work for you as a woman. This doesn't mean you need to eat some wacky exotic food, it just means a different style of nutrition and exercise (if you choose to exercise) should be followed to maximize your results. You have roughly twice as much leptin circulating in your system as a typical man does. Since leptin is a major metabolic signalling molecule you might think that means you should burn twice as many calories as a man. But that isn't the case. Typically when there is more of a hormone circulating in the blood that means it is required to be at that level for some reason, or that the other systems of the body are 'resistant' to that hormone. In the case of leptin it seems that women are somewhat naturally resistant to leptin compared to men. Resistance may seem like a harsh word, so instead think of it as it 18


takes a little more leptin to do its job in a woman’s body compared to in a man’s body. And, this difference is increased with higher bodyfat levels. This is partly why it's difficult for women to start and stay consistent on a diet long enough to get the results they really want. It's also why severe low calorie and very strict dieting (AKA “Crash dieting”) doesn't work for women but might actually be more useful for men. In two research studies done by Nicklas et al. in 1997 it was shown that leptin falls almost twice as much in women compared to men. This means that women experience higher leptin highs, lower leptin lows when attempting to diet. Men don't have these same dramatic swings in leptin as men have lower natural circulating leptin levels, and when men go on a calorie restrictive diet they don't get as much of a decrease in leptin. In other words, a man's metabolism won't crash on a severely calorie restricted diet as easily as it could in women. It also means men won't experience the same feelings of hunger and cravings for carbohydrates during a weight loss program. This might sound familiar to you if you’ve ever attempted to diet alongside a male counterpart and noticed how much easier of a time he seemed to have with it. The two main differences between men and women when it comes to leptin are: 1. Men seem to have a higher natural sensitivity to leptin and therefore lower natural circulating blood levels 2. When men go on a very low calorie restrictive diet they experience less of a drop in leptin and as such their metabolism doesn't crash as easily and they don't get as severe cravings for carbs

To put it another way, women have higher natural leptin, and experience much more dramatic drops in leptin when dieting. So your highs are higher and your lows are lower. Kinda like being on a roller coaster with your metabolism and hunger and cravings throughout the dieting process. Does this sound familiar from the last time you attempted a restrictive diet?! Recall that one of the main focuses of the Venus Factor program is balance. And in the case of leptin men have an easier go of it with balancing leptin while dieting. This is why so many diets that have been written or created and tested on and by men never really work out so well for women. Men can simply push through a low calorie diet with brute force without experiencing large drops or swings in

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leptin that cause cravings and metabolic disturbances. An effective diet program for women must be designed to limit these dramatic swings in leptin in order to allow you to successfully complete your weight loss program and arrive at your ideal weight. In order to eliminate these swings in leptin and avoid creating massive food and carb cravings and metabolic disturbances you can do two things: 1. Increase your sensitivity to leptin 2. Use food itself to restore leptin levels so they never drop too far

Leptin Sensitivity There are 4 things you can do to increase your leptin sensitivity: 1. Get more sleep 2. Follow a well designed exercise program 3. Use a supplement designed to increase leptin sensitivity 4. Fasting

Leptin and Sleep As with many processes of the body, a lack of quality and consistent sleep can mess it up, and leptin is no different. Research shows that a lack of sleep can lead to leptin resistance (Charles LE. et al. 2011) . A very simple but effective strategy for increasing leptin sensitivity to ensure that you're getting enough quality sleep. Many people discount the importance of sleep for a healthy body but it cannot be stressed enough. Good quality consistent sleep is going to make everything work better and feel better, and that includes your leptin sensitivity. If you're not getting enough sleep, or not getting good sleep you should definitely put a plan in place to improve your sleep quality.

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Leptin and Exercise Just as sleep seems to have an effect on all systems of your body, so does exercise. Research also shows that a consistent exercise program will improve leptin sensitivity (Guerra B. et al. 2011). This doesn't mean you need to be lifting big weights like a bodybuilder. Even low intensity non-resistant training exercise will do it. The bottom line is that exercise is an effective tool for improving leptin sensitivity. If you're not getting enough exercise (or any at all) then you're missing out on some major fat burning benefits. This of course is why I've given you the Venus Factor workouts that go with the diet program.

Leptin Sensitizing Herbs Until recently there have never been any supplements that work directly with leptin. Drug companies thought that dosing people directly with leptin would be a cure for obesity (as it is in mice) but unfortunately that doesn't happen in people. As it turns out, having too much leptin isn't the answer. Improving your sensitivity to the leptin you already have, however, is very powerful for producing a fat burning effect. There have been a few herbs discovered that can do this and you can find one very useful supplement that can directly increase your leptin sensitivity. This will be one of your most useful diet supplement tools for achieving your fat loss goals. Until these supplement companies started focusing on leptin most supplements were focused on getting you wired with no regard to leptin sensitivity. This is a very male way of thinking and I'll admit that even in my past career developing weight loss supplements I never considered that there may be gender differences between men and women and a reason why women might not want to take the same fat burner supplements that men do. Now there is a very good option for you that provides a natural, smooth-feeling energy boost but also works on improving leptin sensitivity directly. This is a taylor-made option for women that I highly recommend you take advantage of. I know if there were something this targeted for men I would definitely be using it. You can learn more about these specific herbs at the end of this manual in the supplement section. Leptin and Fasting

21


Periods of short term fasting can help improve leptin sensitivity and reduce bodyfat stores. This doesn't mean you need to go an entire day without eating but rather practice something I call strategic meal skipping. You'll find that many of our past Venus transformation success stories incorporated some form of fasting into their program with great success. Each of these four strategies can go a long way for improving your leptin sensitivity which will reduce your feelings of cravings as well as improve your metabolic functioning throughout the dieting process. Let's face it, dieting is hard enough, and I recommend you use every tool you can to get an advantage and make the process easier. The next strategy is unique to the Venus Factor and is part of the metabolic override protocol, and that is your strategic 'eat up' days, which are not to be confused with 'cheat' days.

22


Liss Graham - Venus Mindset At the age of 28 and after 2 kids, I was finally able to achieve the Venus body that I had wanted all my life. My body is better looking and more functional today than it was when I was 17. I credit it all to Venus for teaching me how to change my life, not just diet or workout.

When I started my transformation, I was so unhappy. I knew at the time I did not like the way that I looked, but had no idea how it affected everything that I said and did. There was a black cloud hanging over my outlook and emotions. The body that I dreamed of eluded me even though I beat my brains out 5 days a week at the gym and counted calories. I would get to average and backslide- a never-ending weight roller coaster since the 3rd Liss Graham

grade. It was incredibly frustrating. No diet or workout ever taught me a LIFESTYLE like VI has accomplished. I learned

how to just live while keeping up my new amazing body- and not just for 12 weeks or 21 days. As a whole, my life has improved and climbed to heights that I would have never dreamed of before my transformation. I was promoted at my job shortly after reaching my ideal Venus metrics. The gym asked me to teach a Venus workout class which has been very fulfilling in helping other women achieve their body goals. This has led to guest authoring articles on the Venus website and even creating a blog of my own to help others. It is also worth mentioning that shopping is enjoyable when you look pretty great in everything that you try on too! People treat me differently, especially men. The compliments flow almost daily from strangers and friends alike. After maintaining for almost 6 months, even the most aloof friends and family are finally asking what my secret is. They WANT to know how I did it and keep my body. Men say out loud that they wish their wives would work out with me. Women say out loud that they wish they had my body. The Venus Factor has not only transformed my outside, but my inside, too, which I never expected. I feel like there is no unattainable achievement or goal now- I know that my mind or body will not hold me back. If I can dream it, I can do it. Thanks, Venus.

23


Nutrition Science Eat-Up Days vs Cheat Days I want to make a distinction right away about 'cheat' days vs our 'eat up' days. From what I understand, a cheat day has been promoted to be a day where you eat massively excessive calories well above your metabolic needs for the day. This has become a bit of a ritual for fitness competitors and bodybuilders who follow severely restrictive diets then let it all loose on their 'cheat' day. I find this to be an unhealthy practice for multiple reasons. First, we can all overeat enough on a given cheat day to undo weeks of dieting. This is clearly just taking a big step backwards. Second, I dislike the use of the word 'cheat' because it implies you're doing something wrong or dishonest. Dieting and managing food is already psychologically stressful enough, there is no reason to add in things that make you feel like you're doing something wrong on purpose. To be clear, there is no way to lose bodyfat without creating a calorie deficit. This should not be news to you. In other words, if you burn 1800 calories today you need to consume less than 1800 calories in order to force your body to burn up some of your bodyfat in order to make up the difference. This is a fundamental law of energy balance and fat loss and it does not change. When men follow a severely calorie restricted diet they don't have as severe of a drop in leptin and therefore their metabolic rate seems to remain stable throughout the process. Women on the other hand cannot simply hit it hard, and go super low on calories for as long as they can stand it. Your leptin levels will fall dramatically leading to metabolic changes that could slow the fat burning process, as well as leaving you ravenously hungry and craving carbs. So in your case you must add in strategic 'eat up' days to prevent these dramatic drops in leptin and to avoid the carb cravings that will come. Most men can push for weeks without having an eat up day, but through our research and working with (and listening to) 100's of women we've found that women need to have strategic 'eat up' days much more frequently than men. This means you're only going to be in a 24


deficit for short stretches of time, then eating up to maintenance to restore normal leptin functioning and avoid any chance of a crash, cravings or a rebound. Throughout the program you will find that your 'eat up' days can come as frequently as every 3 days stretching to every 5th or 6th day. The point is that you'll never go an entire week eating in a deficit and you'll always be able to bring your calories back up to maintenance to reset your system.

'Eating Up' Means Eating at Maintenance Your daily calorie burn is what we call 'maintenance'. When we say 'maintenance' we are referring to the amount of calories you burn and eating up to this same amount of calories such that you don't gain or lose weight but rather you 'maintain' your weight and maintain your metabolism. For example if you burn 1800 calories today, and you eat 1800 calories today you are eating up to maintenance. This is what an 'eat up' day is in this program - Eating up to the total amount of calories you burned in a given day. This is in contrast to a 'cheat' day where you're instructed to eat significantly above maintenance, in some cases 1000's of calories above maintenance. In my experience having full out 'cheat' days just leads to a string of days of binge eating that sets you spiralling backwards both physically and psychologically. And this is because of a phenomenon called “disinhibited eating�.

25


Naomi C – The Venus Mindset Being a Venus for me is about focusing on being the “fittest” and “shapeliest” that my body can be. I don’t focus on losing weight, I keep track of it but only to know it, like knowing my height. When it comes to the Venus body it is all about inches and how I feel and look in my clothing and in a bikini.

Living the Venus lifestyle for me is not about denying myself what I enjoy eating but finding balance in my diet by eating what I like within my chosen calories and macros. Knowing your number and staying within it sounds so hard at the beginning of the Venus journey but I came to realize quite quickly how freeing it is to know exactly how much I can eat and still achieve my goals. I look at my body as a very complex and beautiful system that needs nourishment and encouragement to flourish at its optimum potential. Food, like money, has no power of its own only what I give it. I choose to give food the power to create my best body.

“Clean eating and heavy lifting” is what I strive for every week. The workouts are set out in such an easy to read and learn format with videos Naomi C

to show proper form. These workouts are the core of what I feel makes Venus and Adonis unique, I lift as heavy as I can for all the exercises and

when I am done I know that my body is evolving into its best shape.

26


Disinhibited Eating – 'Good Food' vs 'Bad Food' Thinking Must Go Disinhibited eating comes from the belief that there are 'good' foods you should always be eating and 'bad' foods you should never eat. I don't believe in good vs bad foods and I think that all foods have their place even in a weight loss program. Research shows us a psychological phenomenon that happens when a person who believes they have eaten a forbidden or 'bad' food. They go into a state of 'disinhibited eating' where one step over the forbidden lines leads to an all out feeding frenzy (Lemmens SG Et al. 2010, Stirling and Yeomans. 2004). You might have experienced this at some point when you've been dieting or 'watching' what you eat in the past. The scenario goes something like this. You're on a diet, and you've been 'good' for almost an entire week, only eating 'healthy' foods like salads, veggies, some fruit, lean protein sources but no grains, no sweets, no processed or 'junk' foods. Then one day you're out with some friends and instead of opting for a salad you indulge and join everyone for a slice of pizza. Well now that you've crossed the line into forbidden food territory all bets are off, and that one slice of pizza turns into five slices AND a quart of ice cream for dessert afterwards AND chocolate. After that first slice of pizza your inner voice is saying, “Well you've done it now, that pizza was in the forbidden bad food zone and now that you've crossed the line there is no looking back for today...today is lost so might as well go all out and eat the rest of the pizza AND the ice cream AND the chocolate and we'll get back on track tomorrow.� If this sounds familiar to you then you've experienced disinhibited eating. But the only way to experience an all-out eating frenzy is by having the belief in your mind that there are in fact good vs bad foods. I want you to work on eliminating this belief in good vs bad food and instead to view food from a standpoint of total calories. It is the total calories that you consume that will determine your weight loss success and it really doesn't matter where those calories come from as long as you're hitting your calorie targets for your personal weight loss goal.

27


Keep in mind that for a short while when your goal is weight loss, calories are really all that matter. You've got the rest of your life to determine what exact foods you'd like to have as a part of your diet. And I firmly believe you should allow yourself to eat any and all foods you desire. This even includes some of the foods that most people would call 'bad' or 'junk food'. Don't get me wrong, I'm not suggesting you can survive entirely on potato chips, ice cream and chocolate (although I'd love to try!!!) but it means that all of these foods can and should have their place in a balanced diet, as well as even within your weight loss program itself. Did you notice the word 'balance' show up again? That is because this program is about balance, which also includes a balance of foods ranging from all forms of vegetables, leafy greens, all forms of fruits, grains of any kind, dairy, meat, poultry, fish and seafood, and yes, even processed foods, fast food, candy and whatever people would call 'junk' food. All of it can be part of a successful weight loss program if you do it intelligently, and that is exactly what you'll be doing with the Venus Factor program. Allowing you to freely choose which foods will fit into your diet program is essential to removing the problems that come with the all-or-nothing black-white mindset of 'good' vs 'bad' foods. From now on you need to work on letting go of any belief that there are strictly good or bad foods and instead think of food you enjoy eating vs foods you'd rather not eat. I'm sure you'll end up with a list of foods that come from all categories. I've yet to meet someone who only likes to eat cake and cookies (mmm, I'd also like to try that too!).

Bottom line All foods are ok to eat, some just need to be in limited amounts or less frequently than others, but certainly every week you can have a bit of everything. This goes a long way to keeping your sanity and enjoyment and satisfaction with the process of losing weight and appreciating your body and your food along the way.

28


Susan Doyle - Venus Mindset I have followed the Venus program and still incorporate the exercises into my regular workouts. I would recommend the program to anyone with the understanding that like any new practice, there is still a component of it that you are solely responsible for – ‘the mindset’ - that pulls it altogether.

The Venus mindset is not only following the exercise plan and eating healthy, it is making yourself accountable for your body, Susan Doyle

your mind and your health. While having the pleasure to know

the creator and work with him one on one, I can attribute that the amount of professionalism, knowledge and research that went into structuring this program was for the sole purpose of creating a better workout and health regime for us. As a 30 something female, I could have just taken the book and went with it.

However, the mindset that you bring to the program is one that will inevitably determine your success. A true Venus athlete is one that has a mindset of determination, self-respect and appreciation for her true-self, flaws and all. Like most ladies, you don’t often start a new workout feeling this way, but rather the opposite. By utilizing the Venus program, it provides you with exercises that not only strengthen your muscles but in turn allows you to strengthen your mind. You’ll be proud of your successes and what your body can do. You’ll build on thinking positively about yourself as well as truly understand the importance of controlling your health. Since starting with Venus over 3 years ago, it has taken this whole time for me to finally feel the way I do now. The Venus mindset is one of positive thinking, success and self-admiration. A mindset that once you get there, there is no turning back!

29


Hot Button Foods With that said, you likely have a few foods that don't work well with your body and you'd do well to limit your exposure, but in general I would never label a food as good or bad. Also it's impossible for me to know what foods are your best foods and which ones are your troublemakers. For many people peanut butter is their hot button food – meaning one bite leads to the whole jar! If this is your hot button food then maybe you need to limit your exposure to peanut butter. For other people it might be potato chips, or pasta, or ice cream. The point is I don't know, but you do. Whatever your hot button food is you certainly already know what it is and you can take steps to limit your exposure to this particular food. And I'm not talking about all foods that are tasty here. Your hot button food is that one food that seems to control you instead of you controlling it. For example my hot button food is chicken wings. If I eat 1 I'll eat 30. But peanut butter is of no interest to me. Likewise I can have a small amount of ice cream without craving any more, but put even just one chicken wing in front of me and I'll be looking for more. You need to identify the one hot button food that gets the best of you and give your self a limited exposure to this one food. You can still have it, just make sure you keep the exposure to once every week or two. As you can see I'm not a fan of labelling any food as 'good' or 'bad' for the reasons stated above. I also don't consider any specific time of day as better or worse for eating, which brings us to the next major point of this system. And that is the answer to the following question: What should I eat?

30


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Recipes


Recipe Guide This is a book of common recipes that you will likely recognize but done as lower calorie options. There are options for breakfast, lunch, dinner, appetizers and desserts. Eating for weight loss can be enjoyable and very tasty with just a few key substitutions. You might notice some dishes that you’re familiar with by name, but you may not have thought to make them in the way we have laid out here. Each recipe is meant to create the same taste and experience as the ‘regular’ version but with less total calories. This is a big key to eating meals that are satisfying and feel like ‘yours’ while still losing weight. The goal of this manual is to give you lots options for cooking all kinds of different meals that you are already familiar with and like but with less total calories. And we’ve also tossed in some new ones that you might not have seen before (because variety and learning something new is never a bad thing). Eating realistic, flavorful and satisfying meals during your weight loss is a big key to getting the weight off while enjoying the process. Finally, once you reach your goal weight you can always use the recipes in this guide to maintain your new weight. In many cases these new recipes are simply how I make many of these meals and I’m just as happy eating them as the ‘old’ higher calorie versions I used to make. A little attention to detail when you’re cooking will go a long way to make weight loss fast, easy sustainable and enjoyable. Let’s get cooking! 4


Recipe Contents

Breakfast ............................................................................................. 10 Bagel and Lox ................................................................................. 11 Breakfast Burrito ............................................................................. 12 Breakfast Crepes . ............................................................................ 13 Bran Muffins . ................................................................................. 15 Breakfast Strata ............................................................................... 16 Coffeecake ...................................................................................... 17 Eggs Benedict . ................................................................................ 18 Easy Hollandaise Sauce.................................................................... 19 French Toast . .................................................................................. 20 Pancakes ......................................................................................... 22 Southern-Style Biscuits and Gravy .................................................. 24 Gravy .............................................................................................. 25 Easy Breakfast Scramble .................................................................. 26 Sweet Potato Hash .......................................................................... 27 Egg White Scramble (No Carbs) ..................................................... 28 Pancakes 2 ...................................................................................... 29 Cheese and Veg Omelette ............................................................... 30 French Toast 2 . ............................................................................... 31 Waffles ............................................................................................ 32 Lunches . ............................................................................................. 33 Chicken Tikka Masala . ................................................................... 34 Vegetable Curry .............................................................................. 35 Nova Scotia Donairs ....................................................................... 36 Fish and Chips ................................................................................ 38 Hamburgers and French Fries ......................................................... 39 5


Hot Dogs and Baked Beans . ........................................................... 40 Veggie Pizza .................................................................................... 42 Poutine ........................................................................................... 43 Tacos . ............................................................................................. 44 Wrap . ............................................................................................. 45 Avocado Club Sandwich ................................................................. 47 Tuna Salad ...................................................................................... 48 Vegetarian “Egg” Salad .................................................................... 49 Hearts of Palm Salad ....................................................................... 50 Fruit Salad ...................................................................................... 51 Eggplant Parmesan . ........................................................................ 52 Moo Shu Chicken & Veggies .......................................................... 53 Curry Chickpea Stew ...................................................................... 54 Pulled BBQ Chicken ...................................................................... 55 Cajun Shrimp Bowl ........................................................................ 56 Easy Whole Wheat Spanakopizza .................................................... 57 Fish Tacos ....................................................................................... 58 Creamy Chicken & Mushrooms ..................................................... 59 Healthy Greek Style Salad for Two .................................................. 60 Lamb Curry Vegetables (No Carbs) . ............................................... 61 Tomato & Garbanzo Bean Soup ..................................................... 62 Baked Chicken Pesto with Peas ....................................................... 63 Basil Pesto Topper or Dip . .............................................................. 64 Tuscan Tuna Salad . ......................................................................... 65 Roasted Butternut Squash Soup ...................................................... 66 Mushroom Risotto . ........................................................................ 67 Chicken Fried Rice ......................................................................... 68 Bacon Tomato Pizza ........................................................................ 69 Salmon Pasta with “Cream” Sauce . ................................................. 71 6


Ribs with “Fried” Vegetables ........................................................... 72 Beef Stew ........................................................................................ 74 Dinners ............................................................................................... 75 Bangers and Mash ........................................................................... 76 Barbecue Pork with Cole Slaw.......................................................... 77 Chicken Pot Pie .............................................................................. 79 Fried Chicken ................................................................................. 81 Lasagna ........................................................................................... 83 Macaroni and Cheese ...................................................................... 85 Meatloaf and Mashed Potatoes ........................................................ 86 Paella .............................................................................................. 88 Shepherd’s Pie ................................................................................. 90 Spaghetti Bolognese ........................................................................ 91 Easy Chicken Cordon Bleu ............................................................. 92 Baked Lemon Trout ........................................................................ 93 Smoked Salmon Quiche . ................................................................ 94 Easy Spaghetti Dinner . .................................................................. 95 Dinner by the Sea ........................................................................... 96 Desserts ............................................................................................... 97 Baklava ........................................................................................... 98 Bread Pudding ................................................................................100 Chocolate Chip Cookies .................................................................102 Crispy Rice Treats ...........................................................................103 Fudge Brownies . .............................................................................104 Vanilla Ice Cream . ..........................................................................105 Nanaimo Bars .................................................................................106 New York-Style Cheesecake . ...........................................................108 Riced Pudding ................................................................................110 7


Strawberry Shortcake ......................................................................111 Apple Confit Delight.......................................................................113 Chocolate Roll Cake .......................................................................114 Apple Crumble ...............................................................................115 Angel’s Food Cake . .........................................................................116 Appetizers ...........................................................................................117 Spinach Dip ....................................................................................118 Nachos . ..........................................................................................119 Boston Bib Salad . ...........................................................................120 Snacks .................................................................................................121 Pancetta-Wrapped Scallops . ............................................................122 Buffalo Wings .................................................................................123 Bleu Cheese Dip .............................................................................125 Caramel Popcorn and Peanuts . .......................................................126 Hummus ........................................................................................127 Nachos . ..........................................................................................128 Nuts and Bolts ................................................................................129 Trail Mix .........................................................................................130 Potato Skins ....................................................................................131 Spinach Dip ....................................................................................132 TexMex Cheese Dip ........................................................................133 Ripe Bananas (Mashed) . .................................................................134 Apple Carrot Muffins ......................................................................135 Mocha Biscotti . ..............................................................................136 Special Ocassion .................................................................................137 Classic Green Bean Casserole ..........................................................138 Cream of Mushroom Soup . ............................................................139

8


Deviled Eggs ...................................................................................140 Fondue.............................................................................................141 Holiday Eggless Nog .......................................................................143 Honey-Baked Ham .........................................................................144 Roast Beef and Yorkshire Pudding . .................................................146 Prawn Cocktail (“Shrimp Cocktail�) ..............................................148 Super Bowl Chili . ...........................................................................150 Drinks and Smoothies ........................................................................151 Orange Cream Smoothie ................................................................152 Amaretto Smoothie .........................................................................153 Mocha Smoothie . ...........................................................................154 Banana-Berry Smoothie ..................................................................155

9


Breakfast Breakfast


Breakfast

Bagel and Lox Calories per serving:

110

Serving size:

1 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 110 Servings:

1

Ingredients:

• ½ of a low-calorie “light” bagel • 1 tablespoon non-fat or fat-free cream cheese, softened to room temperature • 1 ounce lox (thinly sliced cured fillet of salmon) • 1 slice fresh red tomato • 1 thin slice fresh purple onion • 1 tablespoon pickled capers • 1 pinch ground black pepper

Instructions: Toast the bagel half. Transfer to serving dish. Spread the cream cheese on the bagel. Top with lox, then tomato, then onion. Garnish with capers and pepper.

11


Breakfast

Breakfast Burrito Calories per serving:

185

Serving size:

1 burrito

Total calories per recipe: 185 Servings:

1

Ingredients: • • • • •

1 (2.5 ounce) low-carb “wrap” (low-calorie flour tortilla) 1 large egg ¼ teaspoon black pepper 1 pinch raw salt 1 tablespoon fresh spring onion or scallion with green tops, thinly sliced • 1 tablespoon fresh jalapeno or other fresh hot pepper, seeded and chopped • 2 tablespoons shredded fat-free cheddar cheese • 2 tablespoons tomato-based salsa or picante sauce

Instructions: Place the wrap or tortilla on a microwave-safe serving dish. Microwave for 30 seconds or until hot. In frying pan over medium heat, scramble egg with salt and pepper. Spoon the cooked egg onto the hot wrap or tortilla. Top with onion, pepper, cheese and salsa or picante sauce. Fold the wrap or tortilla around the filling.

12


Breakfast

Breakfast Crepes Calories per serving:

30 (excluding optional toppings)

Serving size:

2 crepes

Total calories per recipe: 600 Servings:

10

To make 20 Low-Calorie Breakfast Crepes, gather the following ingredients: • 1 large egg ¾ cup all-purpose • ¾ cup water • 2 tablespoons melted butter melted 2 teaspoons pure vanilla extract • ½ teaspoon ground cinnamon ½ teaspoon aluminum-free baking powder • 1 pinch of raw salt

Instructions: Place all ingredients into an electric blender. Process for 10-20 seconds or until batter is very smooth. Add a bit of extra water if necessary. Meanwhile, on stovetop, heat crepe pan over medium heat. This amount of batter will yield 20 crepes (six-inches in diameter).

Optional toppings: • ½ cup fresh strawberries, sliced (23 calories) • ½ cup fresh blueberries (41 calories) • ½ cup fresh loganberries, stewed with 2 tablespoons maple sugar (75 calories)

13


Breakfast

• • • •

1 tablespoon “all-fruit” jam, any variety (40 calories) 2 tablespoons zero-calorie sugar-free syrup, any variety (0 calories) ¼ whipped dairy cream in aerosol can (30 calories) 1 tablespoon confectioners powdered sugar (31 calories)

14


Breakfast

Bran Muffins Calories per serving:

110

Serving size:

1 muffin

Total calories per recipe: 1320 Servings:

12

Ingredients: • • • • • • • • • •

1 tablespoon butter or coconut oil 1 cup cake flour 1 cup wheat bran 1/2 cup whole-wheat flour 2 tablespoons agave nectar or honey 2 teaspoons aluminum-free baking soda 2 teaspoon each: cinnamon and nutmeg ½ teaspoon raw salt 2 large eggs 1/2 cup each: water, buttermilk, unsweetened applesauce

Instructions: Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees. Oil a 12-count muffin tin with 1 tablespoon butter or coconut oil. In a large mixing bowl, stir together the cake flour, wheat bran, whole-wheat flour, stevia, baking soda, cinnamon, nutmeg and salt. In a separate bowl, whisk together the eggs, water, buttermilk and applesauce. Fold the wet mixture into the dry mixture, stirring just until thoroughly blended (add a bit more water if the resulting batter is too dry). Divide the batter equally into the muffin tin. Bake at 400 degrees for 15 minutes or until done.

15


Breakfast

Breakfast Strata Calories per serving:

285

Serving size:

1/6 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 1710 Servings:

6

Ingredients: • 1 tablespoon bacon drippings • 4 cups, stale bread or leftover toast, cut into bits (various kinds of stale bread or leftover toast work well in this recipe) • 6 slices of cooked bacon, crumbled (or ½ cup cooked ham, chopped) • 1 cup grated non-fat or fat-free cheddar cheese • 6 large eggs • ¾ cup water • 1 teaspoon each: dry mustard, hot pepper sauce • ½ teaspoon each: black pepper, raw salt

Instructions: Oil a casserole dish with the bacon drippings. Spread half the bread or toast over the bottom the dish. Top with bacon and cheese. In a mixing bowl, whisk together the eggs, water, mustard, pepper sauce, pepper and salt. Pour this egg mixture evenly over the bread, bacon and cheese in the dish. Top with the remaining 2 cups of bread or toast. Cover, and refrigerate at least 1 hour or overnight. To cook, pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. Remove cover from dish. Cook at 350 degrees for 90 minutes, or until the eggs are set. If the top is browning too quickly, tent with foil.

16


Breakfast

Coffeecake Calories per serving:

195

Serving size:

¼ recipe

Total calories per recipe: 780 Servings:

4

Ingredients: • • • • • • • • • •

1 tablespoon butter or coconut oil 1 cup all-purpose flour Stevia equivalent to ¾ cup sugar 2 teaspoons aluminum-free baking powder ½ teaspoon salt 2 egg whites ¼ cup unsweetened applesauce ¼ cup water 4 tablespoons brown sugar 2 teaspoons cinnamon

Instructions: Pre-heat oven to 375 degrees. Oil a 9-inch square baking dish with the butter or coconut oil. In mixing bowl, stir together the flour, sugar, baking powder and salt. In a separate bowl, whisk together the egg whites, applesauce and water. Add the wet mixture to the dry mixture, stirring until just blended. Spoon batter into the prepared baking dish. Top with brown sugar and cinnamon. Bake at 375 degrees for 20-25 minutes or until done.

17


Breakfast

Eggs Benedict Calories per serving:

300

Serving size:

1 recipe (including sauce)

Total calories per recipe: 300 Servings:

1

Ingredients: • ½ of an English muffin or crumpet, toasted • 1 ounce lean ham or pancetta • 1 egg, poached Easy Low-Calorie Hollandaise sauce (see recipe, below) • 2 tablespoons chopped truffles

Instructions: Arrange the toasted muffin or crumpet half on a serving dish. Top with ham, then the poached egg. Spoon Easy Low-Calorie Hollandaise Sauce over. Garnish with chopped truffles.

Note: For Low-Calorie Eggs Florentine (250 calories per serving) omit ham. Instead, use ¼ cup cooked or canned, chopped spinach (drain the spinach, and then press with paper towels to absorb most of the cooking or canning liquid).

18


Breakfast

Easy Hollandaise Sauce Calories per serving:

97

Serving size:

1 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 97 Servings:

1

Ingredients: • • • • •

1 egg yolk 1 teaspoon lemon juice ¼ teaspoon Dijon mustard 1 pinch of raw salt 1 teaspoon butter, melted

Instructions: Place egg yolk, lemon juice, mustard and salt into an electric blender. Process for 5-10 seconds or until the mixture is smooth. With the blender still running, slowly add the melted butter. Immediately spoon the resulting mixture atop the assembled Eggs Benedict or Eggs Florentine, and top with truffles.

19


Breakfast

French Toast Calories per serving:

300 (excluding optional toppings)

Serving size:

1 piece

Total calories per recipe: 300 Servings:

1

Ingredients: • • • • • •

1 large egg 1 tablespoon water 1 teaspoon pure cane sugar (or equivalent amount of stevia) ½ teaspoon pure vanilla extract ¼ teaspoon pure almond extract 1 slice stale bread, sliced 1 inch thick (a hearty artisan white bread, French or Italian, will work best for this recipe) • ½ teaspoon ground cardamom • Pinch of raw salt • 1 teaspoon cold-pressed coconut oil

Instructions: Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees. In mixing bowl, whisk together the egg, water, sugar or stevia, vanilla extract and almond extract. Add the bread, soak for 2 minutes, then flip and soak for 2 more minutes or until all of the egg mixture is absorbed into the bread. Oil an oven-safe dish with 1 teaspoon coconut oil. Transfer the egg-soaked bread to the dish. Sprinkle the bread with cardamom and a pinch of raw salt. Bake at 350 degrees for 15-20 minutes or until golden brown.

20


Breakfast

Optional toppings: • 1 tablespoon confectioner’s powdered sugar (31 calories) • 2 tablespoons zero-calorie sugar-free maple syrup (0 calories) • 2 tablespoons pure maple syrup (50 calories)

21


Breakfast

Pancakes Calories per serving:

100 (excluding optional toppings)

Serving size:

2 pancakes

Total calories per recipe: 1200 Servings:

6

To make 12 Low-Calorie Pancakes, you will need: • • • • • • • • • • •

1 tablespoon cold-pressed coconut oil 1 cup cake flour + ¾ cup all-purpose flour 2 tablespoons pure cane sugar 2 teaspoons aluminum-free baking powder 1 teaspoon aluminum-free baking soda ½ teaspoon raw salt 2 eggs 2 cups water 2 tablespoons melted butter 1 tablespoon fresh lemon juice 1 teaspoon pure vanilla extract

Instructions: Over medium heat, pre-heat a cast-iron griddle, spreading a tablespoon of coconut oil to thoroughly coat the surface of the griddle. In a mixing bowl, stir together the flour, sugar, baking powder, baking soda and salt. In a separate bowl, whisk together the eggs, water, melted butter, lemon juice and vanilla extract. Add wet mixture to dry mixture, stirring until just blended (do not over-mix; the batter should have several small lumps). Pour pancake batter onto hot griddle to make 12 pancakes. Cook for 1 minute or until the edges appear dry and some of the bubbles appearing in the batter have begun to pop. Flip each pancake once, and cook for another minute, or until a light golden brown on both sides. 22


Breakfast

Optional toppings: • • • •

1 teaspoon sweet butter (30 calories) 2 tablespoons pure maple syrup (50 calories) 2 tablespoons zero-calorie sugar-free maple syrup (0 calories) 1 tablespoon “all-fruit” jam, any variety (40 calories)

23


Breakfast

Southern-Style Biscuits and Gravy Calories per serving:

200 (including gravy)

Serving size:

1 biscuit + 1 portion gravy

Total calories per recipe: 2400 Servings:

12

To make 1 dozen Low-Calorie Southern-Style Biscuits, gather the following ingredients: • 2 cups self-rising flour, chilled • 4 tablespoons salted butter, chopped into small bits, then frozen • 1 cup (8 ounces) warm water

Instructions: Pre-heat oven to 400 degrees. In a mixing bowl, use your fingertips to work the frozen butter into the flour. The resulting texture should resemble coarse cornmeal. Using a fork, stir the warm water into the flour mixture, until a dough begins to form. Scoop the dough onto a lightly-floured surface. Knead lightly until the dough just holds together; do not over-mix. With a sharp knife cut the dough into 12 equal portions. With your hands shape each portion into a biscuit. Place the biscuits onto a lightly-floured baking sheet or Pyrex pie plate. Bake at 400 degrees for 10-15 minutes or until risen and nicely browned. Each biscuit = 100 calories. To serve, transfer to individual plates, and top each biscuit with 1 portion of Low-Calorie Gravy.

24


Breakfast

Gravy Calories per serving:

92

Serving size:

1/12 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 1100 Servings:

12

Ingredients: • • • •

8 tablespoons bacon drippings 8 tablespoons all-purpose flour 1 teaspoon each: black pepper, raw salt 4 cups water

Instructions: In a skillet or saucepan over medium heat, stir together the bacon drippings, flour, pepper and salt. Cook, stirring constantly with a spatula to scrape the bottom of the skillet, until the mixture is sizzling and just beginning to brown nicely. Slowly add the water, stirring constantly and continuing to scrap the bottom of the pan. Continue cooking for 10-15 minutes, until the gravy is bubbling and beginning to thicken nicely. (If it’s too thick, add a bit of hot water.)

25


Breakfast

Easy Breakfast Scramble Calories per serving:

118

Serving size:

1/4 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 472 Servings:

4

Ingredients: • • • • • • •

1/2 cup red onion, diced 1 tomato, seeded and diced 4 eggs 4 egg whites 1 tbsp. dill, fresh (taste more like dill than the dried stuff) Salt & pepper 1 tsp. olive oil

Instructions: Cook onion in olive oil over medium-high heat for about 4 minutes. Add the diced tomato and cook another minute or 2. Place onion and tomato mixture in a bowl and set aside. Beat together eggs and whites, add in salt and pepper as needed. Cook egg mixture over medium-low heat, stirring frequently until the eggs are just about set and no longer runny. Drain any additional liquids from the onion and tomato bowl and stir into egg mixture. Toss with dill and get your day off to a great start.

26


Breakfast

Sweet Potato Hash Calories per serving:

131

Serving size:

1/4 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 524 Servings:

4

Ingredients: • • • • • • • •

1 red onion, cubed 2 sweet potatoes, peeled and cubed 1/4 tsp. kosher salt 1 tsp. fresh black pepper 2 garlic cloves, finely chopped 1 tsp. thyme, chopped 1/3 cup Black Forest Ham, diced 1 tbsp. extra-virgin olive oil

Instructions: Heat oil over medium-high heat and cook onion about 3-4 minutes until browned. Stir occasionally. Lower heat to medium and add in sweet potatoes. Cook 8 minutes or until potatoes reach desired tenderness, then stir in ham, garlic and thyme.

Note: Add a scrambled egg or fruit salad to this to prevent those latemorning sugar cravings!

27


Breakfast

Egg White Scramble (No Carbs) Calories per serving:

200.5

Serving size:

1 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 200.5 Servings:

1

Ingredients: • • • • • • •

2 egg whites 1/2 cup spinach pepper 1 slice gruyere cheese, chopped 1 garlic clove, grated 1 tsp. red pepper flakes 1 tbsp. olive oil

Instructions: Add pepper and garlic to egg whites and mix. In skillet over medium heat add egg whites and garlic mixture to the skillet and cook for 2 minutes. Add in spinach and cook until slightly wilted, 1 minute. Add cheese and cook until done, 1 minute. Sprinkle with red pepper flakes and enjoy!

28


Breakfast

Pancakes 2 Calories per serving:

207

Serving size:

1/4 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 828 Servings:

4

Ingredients: • • • • • • • • •

3 medium eggs (whites only) 1 cup flour 1 tsp baking powder 1 tsp sweetener 1 tsp cinnamon 1/2 cup skim milk 2 tsp vegetable oil 1/2 cup low calorie syrup 1 cup blueberries

Instructions: Combine egg, egg whites, and milk and beat briefly. Stir in cheese and vegetables and pour mixture into a lightly oiled pan on medium heat. Gently push in edges and let sit for 1-2 minutes, then fold in half and continue cooking for 2-3 minutes. Having one whole egg adds flavour to the omelette and the extra whites give it volume. Try using stronger cheeses (blue, aged, etc.) because you don’t need as much of them to get a nice flavour throughout. Salt and pepper to taste!

29


Breakfast

Cheese and Veg Omelette Calories per serving:

230

Serving size:

1 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 230 Servings:

1

Ingredients: • • • • • • •

1 medium egg (whole) 2 medium egg (whites) 1/4 cup skim milk 2 tbsp shredded parmesan 1/2 tomato (chopped) 1/4 cup spinach (chopped) 1 tsp vegetable oil

Instructions: Combine egg, egg whites, and milk and beat briefly. Stir in cheese and vegetables and pour mixture into a lightly oiled pan on medium heat. Gently push in edges and let sit for 1-2 minutes, then fold in half and continue cooking for 2-3 minutes. Having one whole egg adds flavour to the omelette and the extra whites give it volume. Try using stronger cheeses (blue, aged, etc.) because you don’t need as much of them to get a nice flavour throughout. Salt and pepper to taste!

30


Breakfast

French Toast 2 Calories per serving:

274.5

Serving size:

1/2 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 549 Servings:

2

Ingredients: • • • • • • •

4 slices low calorie (thin-sliced) bread 3 egg whites 3 tbsp skim milk 1 tsp vanilla 1 tsp vegetable oil 1 cup low calorie whipped topping 1 cup sliced strawberries

Instructions: Mix and gently beat milk, egg whites, vanilla, vegetable oil, and season with cinammon. Next, soak slices of bread in the egg mixture, turning to coat both sides. Cook slices one minute a side on a medium heat nonstick frying pan and serve with whipped topping and sliced strawberries! Flavouring with cinnamon and vanilla can add sweetness without having to add sugar.

31


Breakfast

Waffles Calories per serving:

274.5

Serving size:

1/2 recipe

Total calories per recipe: 549 Servings:

2

Ingredients: • • • • • • • •

3 medium eggs (whites only) 1 cup flour 1 tsp baking powder 1 tsp sweetener 1/2 cup skim milk 2 tsp vegetable oil 1/2 cup low calorie syrup 1 cup blueberries

Instructions: This waffle recipe has all the same ingredients as the pancake recipe. My recommendation is to beat the egg whites until they are stiff before folding them into the flour mixture to give a nice crispy outside to the waffles. To add extra protein to your waffles or pancakes, substitute the flour for vanilla protein powder, which has the same amount of calories but a lot more protein!

32


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