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THE C oser - Issue 2 -



In order to achieve our goal of bringing Europe closer to the citizens, we need to make the first step towards them. This would influence the citizens in a way that everyone will aim to become an active citizen. After all, cooperation should lead to a win-winsituation and have benefits for both parties. Until now this has been an amazing experience, a session of new beginnings, as we previously expected. Everyone has enjoyed an exciting time during team building, some fruitful debates in committee work and we are now witnessing the highlight of the session: the General Assembly. The second issue is dedicated to you, the citizens of Europe, or in this case, the participants of this session. Being surrounded by hard working and cheerful journalists, we were delighted to receive all the articles on time and reading them was a real pleasure. We do hope you, reader, feel the same way, because this media team has put a lot of effort into making this newspaper. We, the editors of this session, really enjoyed the time here in Ireland, because we could have not wished for a better media team, the organizing team fulfilled all of our wishes, and the resolutions are lying in front of the accomplished but motivated delegates. EYP Ireland did an excellent job hosting us and welcomed us with open arms from the beginning on. Mara BălaČ™a & Lorenzo Leunberger — Editors



CONTENTS 5 COMMANDMENTS DURING GA – p. 3/4 By brendan byrne

Guidelines on writing a resolutioN – p. 5/6 BY tomina vodarici

Interviews – p. 7/8 BY Lidia Grasu & Lee moran

Dos & don’ts – p. 9/10 BY harry Heath, Anna Lefering & Luke Gibbons

AFET – p. 11 BY Lee moran

DrOI – p. 12 BY anna lefering

EMPL – p. 13 By lidia grasu

ENVI I – p. 14 by tomina vodarici

ENVI II – p. 15 By luke gibbons

FEMM – p. 16 by claudia dalby

IMCO – P. 17 by brendan byrne

ITRE – P. 18

by lola hourihane

SEDE – P. 19 by harry heath

EYP LIMERICK-POEM – P. 20 by lola hourihane


By Brendan Byrne My dear delegates, I have been tasked with writing a very serious article. I must be frank. Your safety, nay your very life, may depend on how carefully you read this article. In this article, I shall list the five cardinal sins of General Assembly (GA). If you consciously continue to break these, and disregard my advice, not only will you grind GA to a nauseating speed, but you will also hurt my feelings. With no further ado, the five sins are:

1. 2. 3. 4. 5.

Speaking French Incorrectly Misuse of a Point of Debate Misuse of a Direct Response Misuse of an Attack Speech Not Talking into the Microphone

As you are aware, English and French are the two recognised languages of the European Parliament. That means that in GA you may speak French. It is acceptable to make a whole point in French. Unfortunately, my pet hate, or as the French would say, my “bêtise noir”, is when one starts a point in French, and then continues in English, for example: “Je m’appelle Brendan, and I am a delegate from St. Colmcilles “ Delegate, if you are going to make a point in French, that is well and good! However, please refrain from making only part of a point in French. Parce que you just look foolish. A simple point understood by all is far more effective than one that is barely understood.


This brings me on to my next point, a “point of debate”. No doubt, your chairs have or will have explained to you that this has to be a single point. It is not called “points of debate” for a reason. You are to get up and make one concise point, dealing with one issue. An easy example to help you remember: “Ice cream is a dessert.” - correct “Ice cream is a dessert. Shoes are not a dessert.” - incorrect A direct response is a simple thing. It is directly responding to the previous point made. It is not a way to jump the queues and make point. An example of a direct response is. “I just bought a new pair of shoes and some ice cream. Ice cream is lovely melted.” “I disagree with your point, I think it’s better served frozen.” - correct “I just bought a new pair of shoes and some ice cream. Ice cream is lovely melted.” “You don’t need new shoes!” - incorrect So, a direct response is connected only to the last raised point of debate.

The Attack speech is the most misused speech during GA. An attack speech should not be you saying “I do not really understand the resolution” or “I commend the delegation on a strong resolution but…” You want this resolution to fail. Not because of vindictiveness, but because you fundamentally disagree with what is written in it. An attack speech should attack the very core of a resolution. It should contain terms like “I wholeheartedly disagree with...”, or “I cannot allow this resolution to pass”. You should endeavour to dismantle the resolution, as having it passed would be a backwards step for the European Union. Finally, speaking into microphones. I would kick myself for not bringing this up. When speaking into a microphone, a good rule is to hold it to your chin. Also, speak slowly, clearly and loudly. Follow these rules, and you shall be greeted by attentive ears, as the clarity of your voice shall be impeccable. My dearest delegates, I promise you that if you follow these rules you shall have a swifter GA and a better memory of EYP as a whole.


Guidelines on writing a resolution By Tomina Vodarici

Taking into account the fact that most of you are having your first interaction with EYP here, at the Leinster Regional Session, you do not know everything that it actually entails. You experienced teambuilding, where you played rather funny, weird games in order for you to create a united committee. This was the first step when it comes to preparing you for writing the resolution, the final result of your work. Keep in mind that, when writing a resolution, there are some unwritten rules that must be respected if you want your committee’s solutions to be powerful. It is highly appreciated when a resolution is well researched and creative, since usually this is the kind of resolution only few people can attack. These being said, here are some hints that may give you a perspective on what should not be included in your debates: 1. Never propose media campaigns! This idea has been used everywhere, no matter the topic, and it is just the easiest idea possible in EYP. Anyone is already well aware of the annoying existence of multiple media campaigns, most of them having no effect, so try to avoid mentioning this during committee work, otherwise your chairs will simply go crazy.


2. Raising awareness is not a solution. Making people “aware” of what is going on in different fields will neither change the course of events, nor will it solve the problem. Remember, what is worse than raising awareness is proposing media campaigns in order to raise people’s awareness… 3. Being creative is not bad at all and, on the contrary, we encourage it and we embrace it with open arms. However, it has its limits. Whenever you are thinking about creating a new organization, or a party, or a whole new body that does “something innovative”… just wake up from this dream and move on. There are already lots of such organizations or bodies that have different purposes, it is impossible that EU needs another one, trust me.

4. Overviews are written to be read. It goes without saying that the overview from your chairs must be the foundation of your research. The whole point of it is to steer you through the main problems that your topic encounters and moreover, to have a better understanding of the topic background. The pre-session preparations are essential for your involvement in the session and being able to envision what the resolution should look like would, without doubt, make your job a lot easier. 5. Make short, comprehensive operative clauses, so that anyone can understand your point. The other delegates were not present at your intense debates from the committee work, they may not see the connections that you have made and therefore, they can easily attack you, just because they did not properly get the idea.

6. Before speaking up your idea, answer these two questions first: “Is my point relevant to the topic? Can I express it in a parliamentary-like manner?” If you are simply thinking about a short-video competition that is supposed to transmit a message towards Europeans or investing in robots that can do the boring, yet necessary work for EU’s economy or even other things that are probably illegal… drop it. 7. Finally, maybe one of the most essential aspects… believe in that resolution, see it as your most precious work and be proud of it, as it is the only way you can eventually defend it during the General Assembly.


By Lidia Grasu


What initially contured into our thoughts as a professional encounter, came to life as a laid-back chat with an interviewee who greeted us warmly and wholeheartedly answered our questions. No doubt that it was this friendly, relaxed attitude that has brought Marie Dromey to this point in her EYP journey. The President of the session does not display any sternness or severity, but seems rather eager to talk to us, in spite of her busy schedule. The conversation is about the session and its importance. Being the first Leinster Regional Session to be held outside of Dublin, it does not only represent a unique event in the history of EYP Ireland, but also a tremendous opportunity for its new and old members alike. Ms. Dromey notes the privilege that she and her colleagues are given. The President position is one full of responsibilities and power, as Marie knows too well. The team that she has put together has been constantly communicating and consulting for over a month before the session in order to ensure that delegates can enjoy the best and most complex EYP experience. Everyone envisions the President as possessing the usual qualities of a leader, but for herself, Marie tells that not only are organizational skills essential, but that an even bigger part in ensuring an appropriate demeanor is represented by one’s liaising abilities. With a President’s job meaning constant communication with the Head-Organizer, Editors, sponsors and other officials, fully understanding of what the other positions require is necessary for a swift collaboration. It therefore goes without saying that a President needs to “put their experience into perspective”. Every piece of the puzzle is important, and being a delegate is not one easily forgotten. Her first regional session brings a reminiscent smile to our President’s face, but her fondest memories are not reduced to that first experience. That is dedicated to feeling as part of a committee, the moment when you can feel it click, when you realize that you have just come to a solution by yourselves. She does not disregard the perks of being a President, out of which she tells that she definitely enjoys having the opportunity to spend a little time with each committee. “No two committees are ever alike”, she says, and the best part is being able to see chairs and delegates with different approaches and ideas, rather than being part of one sole group.



By Lee Moran

I had the lovely opportunity to catch Leanne, the Head Organiser of the session, on a short break from her extremely busy schedule. We had a general discussion about the session, but I had the hidden of tensions of extending it into a bit of an interview. Leanne is very passionate about her mission to bring EYP to more people. This session is historic and is expanding EYP into new territory. Not only is Leanne aware of that, but she is also proud and feels privileged to be the Head Organiser of a session held in Laois for the first time, “it’s great to have the first one in my home county”. The best Head Organiser, according to Leanne, is someone who should be organised, she laughs at stating the obvious. “Plan ahead, prepare for every possible outcome and always have a backup”. She also adds listing, making and putting in the nice little extra touches at a session as desired characteristics. She has been preparing for this session for over a year “it’s been loads of work, I’ve made hundreds phone calls, sent thousands of emails”. So much work goes in to organising a session and Leanne is no exception. She said she has no idea what she will do with herself on Monday once it is all over, “I’ve been living and breathing it for over a year”. Leanne recounted her first EYP at the Leinster session in 2011, her first impression of EYP was “a load of weirdoes in a circle shouting nonsense words at each other”. She laughs but also takes time to tell me her fondest memories from EYP, such as singing “Imagine” at her national session and everyone crying, or as she smirks and says “when I destroyed Glenn Byrne’s (a student in the same school as her and fellow alumnus) committee’s resolution with an attack speech. She said her favourite thing about being a Head Organiser is seeing delegates here that otherwise would have never gotten the chance to do EYP. When I asked what she thinks about the session theme, she said she is of the opinion that it is important and feels Europe unites us and brings European citizens closer together. Unfortunately I couldn’t keep the chat going as Leanne had to run and go back to her busy role at the session. But it is always a pleasure to get a chance to stop and chat with the person who made this session happen.


D s By Harry Heath 1. Speak your mind

Make yourself heard in General Assembly: you will regret it if you spend the whole day in silence.

2. Read the newspapers (And not just because we are partial)

The papers contain useful information about your topics and you can keep them as mementos of your time at the session.

3. Listen carefully

Nothing is worse and more embarrassing then when someone stands up and makes the same point as someone else... people will groan and you will feel ashamed.

4. Try to sleep

Although it can be tempting to attempt an all-nighter, you will regret it - trust me!

5. Drink as much caffeine as possible

EYP and sleep do not really go together - if you are trying to get through General Assembly on less than 5 hours sleep then coffee and tea are a must.

6. Get to know lots of people

Many of the people putting the session together this weekend first met each other at sessions just like this one and are still friends years later.

7. Improve your ninja and street fighter skills

To get anywhere in EYP, you need to perfect your hadouken and your ninja chop; all MEPs in Brussels are masters at these key team-building games.

8. Form decent circles

As you should realise by now, everything in EYP is started with forming a circle and the rounder the circle the better - a squished oval is barely acceptable.


D N’Ts By Anna Lefering & Luke Gibbons 1. Don’t just stand there – join in!

Nothing is more annoying than going home with that nagging feeling that you could have, should have done this, said this or approached that person – so don’t be shy and just go for it! Say what you think and chat to as many people as you like!

2. Hip teens, don’t wear blue jeans… Don’t walk around in casual clothes!

… at least not at the Opening Ceremony or General Assembly. Both are official events which require you to look at sleek as you can – and boys, we know you like that James-Bond-feeling and what girl doesn’t like dressing up? So throw on those suits and dresses!

3. Golden Rule – Don’t get it going with the officials

You knew this was coming… No matter how incredibly attractive the officials are (and yes we are aware of the fact that we are all pretty much irresistible) – a little tête-a-tête between delegates and officials is off limits…

4. Don’t be afraid to make an utter and complete fool of yourself

The most entertaining part of the session is probably team building. The great thing about those ice breaker games is that you don’t need to be embarrassed about making yourself look like an idiot (in case you actually do end up looking like a fool, it probably means you win whatever game you were playing!)

5. Don’t be late

Yes, yes, we know you are old enough and don’t need to be mothered anymore, but just a quick reminder: Even though this isn’t school, you should focus on being on time. What is more uncomfortable than having 100 people waiting for you, only because you took those extra five minutes? Please, do follow the session schedule, so our lovely organizers won’t grow grey hair over you…

6. Don’t forget to let everybody know how great it was

When the session is over, you should definitely make sure you don’t keep your enthusiasm about EYP under wraps - do tell all your friends how great it was and make sure all of them want to join the famous EYP spirit, too.

7. Most importantly: Do NOT smoke alcohol!



War: Syrians have had enough AFET

By Lee Moran

Between going bananas and jumping on it, AFET has managed to make a loveable first impression to me as I awkwardly shuffled about the boiling committee room contemplating what to write my article about. From my own experience, team building was a strange and new experience that I found quite daunting but AFET managed to take to it like a fish to water.

Underline and define was used to help the committee initially comprehend the task at hand. They also needed to find out what EU bodies were already at their disposal to help alleviate the issue. The problems brought about by the issue were discussed soon the greatest dangers were finally addressed which allowed the solution to be formed in its infancy from around midday.

The committee took the opportunity to sneak Syrian refugees through a swamp to safety when they were rudely interrupted by a fire drill. But this disturbance did not deter AFET from completing the challenge. No committee would be complete without their own chant. AFET brought cheerleader pep and some initiative to excite the other committees for the committee presentations.

One of the central discussions focused on how possible money given to Member States which take in refugees should be spent to allow Syrians to have basic needs. One of the central tenets of the proposal was that they could expand upon the efforts of the European Asylum support office (EASO) through funding its projects to help those under intense pressure from taking on so many refugees or asylum seekers. Forming a resolution is never easy and committee work takes its toll and so a much needed boost in the form of lunch was needed.

Then Saturday morning brought the long awaited committee work. The plight of refugees and asylum seekers, of which needed clarification, did not prove too tall a task for AFET. Set up by the chairs in a horse shoe shape and once the golden rules were set in place, discussion began in earnest from the eager committee. Flipcharts and post-its in abundance prepared the committee to tackle this difficult and relevant topic.


There is much discussion left to go and I can start to see AFET begin to reach their targets and produce a solid resolution, I look forward to seeing the resolution they produce and how they perform in GA. They are sure to excel during the debate.


D-R-O-I, You ain’t got no alibi… By Anna Lefering

Saturday morning 8 o’clock: Prison officers Kieran and Lukas open the gate and let the prisoners of DROI into the work space to commence their daily routine. First on the agenda is a grueling round of ‘Street Fighter’ followed by an exhausting game of ‘Fruit salad’. The question you are surely asking yourself now is: “Why are the DROIdelegates imprisoned? What crime did they commit to deserve such treatment?” Well, the obvious reasons are their good looks and charm! Other offenses include killing Anne Hathaway in order to save Jennifer Lawrence – the prison officers were not amused – and conspiring to melt shoes in order to extract their chemicals to make poison out of it. One of the delegates might just as well have been convicted for gross bodily harm: Her shoe flew off during a dance competition and hit a man right in the face! If you ask the detainees of DROI what they most likely would be convicted for, apart from those atrocious crimes, you will find answers like ‘too many swags’ or ‘robbing a wedding cake’ - You can see, those delegates are some tough guys! Better be careful around them!

They also seem to have a weird tendency to start fire alarms by accident… Not sure what is up with that… However, the inmates earned privilege rights by kicking ass at the chantoff-competition, where they let their artistic, creative side come through and shine! It really is no surprise that some of them wondered off the right path and right into criminality, just listen to what has happened to them in their lives and you will understand: Imagine it would have been you who had coke poured over you after setting your hair on fire and then having to walk all the way home… Would you not have turned to the dark side as well? What if you had wanted to jump on your friend’s back in the middle of a shopping center – only to find out, that it was actually your French teacher? Would that not have made you lose sight of what is right and wrong? The most important thing though, is that all of them – despite their felonies – are lovely, lovely people, or, as they would describe themselves: smart, fun, amazing, wonderful, cooperative, friendly, honest, intelligent, witty, lively, creative, splendiferous, swaggy, fab – or simply put: The best (and obviously not vain at all…)’re imprisoned - And you’re never getting out! 12


The most employed Committee By Lidia Grasu

As a Chair and as a Journo, you start wondering about your committee the moment you have been allocated a topic. Your preparatory ritual does not boil down to picking interesting games and deciding on an approach for committee work, as certain questions arise as soon as you remember that you are supposed to be more than an authority figure, more than a coordinator. You begin to ponder on the different types of delegates, on ways in which they are likely to integrate into the academic environment of the EYP, on the various personalities that might enhance or threaten the unfolding of the session. And eventually, you start wondering what sets apart committees made up of all these little particular characters. Employment pleads their case from the very first encounter: the way they cooperate with each other is extraordinary. Never have I seen such a well-organized group. Be it Abigail’s degenerate tale, a plane crash or the issues of disabled people in the European labour market, the eight voices of EMPL will have a word on it. But their qualities extend way past having a well-defined opinion, as there is more to the members of the committee than their politeness when it comes to one of them expressing a viewpoint. It is the patience they so maturely display every time someone is proposing an idea or mentioning a fact, as if all they are trying to absorb their words.


With the encouragement of their chairs, EMPL go for the round table approach when it comes to business. The story goes a little bit off track, because this committee really takes to the floor. While they can deliver a flawless impression of a snail, their floor-bound adventures are, beyond a fun way to further get acquainted, an indefinite proof of their team spirit. Referring to their beastly instinct, the chairs have turned the delegates into many animals. It was during their time spent as monkeys that EMPL had to watch out for each other, as the hunters were really out to get them. Whether guiding a blinded primate, or rolling a brother who was shot in the limbs around the floor as they made it out of the woods, just as they made it out of the intricate labyrinth that issues of the labour market form. The first experience as part of a committee is defining for one’s drive to become active in EYP. Therfore the team plays an invaluable part in determining the general atmosphere at a session. It is true that there will definitely come a time when ideas collide, at the expense of personal or professional relationships. But I am confident that this committee will prove immune to such impediments. Although there will be opposite conceptions debated in their committee room, their ability to patiently listen to each other will help them overcome those tense moments, materializing in the final product of their work: their resolution.


For those about to rock By Tomina Vodarici It was the very first day of this amazing session. The wonderful delegates form ENVI were ready for teambuilding in Envisburg, their small village. The two big and not-scary-at-all werewolves, the chairs, were sitting in front of them, smiling. Everything was fine in paradise, and even though they did not know it at that time, ENVI was ready to rock this session. Few name games and our characters were already into business. You could just observe how they are starting to bond and form this powerful team that will, without doubt, make a good impression. They performed admirably at “Two truths, one lie”, managing to come up with crazy scenarios that were really funny and confusing, and they are like the sweetest bees at this session. They are buzzin’! But this was only the beginning, so keep reading, lads! The moment their relationship became closer was during the Monster game. Even though they lost the competition on the edge, they had established a very good tactic, which is all that matters in the end. However, they totally kicked ass at “Street fighter”, being cheerful and loud, literally letting the EYP spirit get to them. As each relationship has its ups and downs, the ENVI family encountered some problems when they were attacked by dangerous werewolves during a full moon, as Kevin was killed repeatedly and Joe severely mutilated.

These events traumatized them and made them make really bad decisions, like eliminating their not-so-innocent journalist that was, honestly now, one of the murders’ main causes. Sorry guys… It was a busy day in Envisburg, and in spite of the previously mentioned events, they were still excited and energetic, looking forward to Committee Work. So the next day came in fast paces, just like every EYP session passes unnoticed. Our amazing delegates were fresh and ready to discuss the negative effects of nuclear energy and how it has destructible influences upon EU citizens’ safety. They presented themselves with a throughout research, and I am pretty sure I am not wrong when I say they made their chairpersons really proud. Their resolution is pretty strong, so beware, committees, your job will not be easy! I will only say, as I am an international official at this session, that I am really impressed by their performance overall, as, honestly, I did not expect them to be so dedicated to each part of the session. It came as a pleasant surprise for me to see that EYP touched them in just almost two days and I really hope they will all attend other sessions, in Ireland or abroad.




By Luke Gibbons

The matter is that they most certainly have been to places and degrees you would never in your wildest dreams begin to imagine. A committee can be one or two things; fun or funnier and ENVI II are most definitely the latter. This committee began their intriguing team building by “Killing Babies” of all things. You might ask with extreme concern for a child’s well being, WHY? Let’s just say it involved a baby and themselves. The baby lost, that is all. This may upset some of you but “Jesus Christ” with his thought-provoking speech stopped the other delegates before it was possible to “kill the baby”. You may begin to think that this divided ENVI II. In fact the experience bonded them together like super glue that “will not let it slide down onto mine”. The committee is one of a very strong nature and will stick together through anything that is thrown at them. This is most definitely down to their amazing chairs’ truly astonishing team building activities. These games involved “just putting it in your mouth” a match stick that is, and “everyone getting down on their knees” for the lava game. There also seems to be a running theme so they are very topic-focused. This practical preparation will allow them to become truly engrossed with the topic.


Some have felt like “singing a song about loving and kissing” and others have been preoccupied with Mr. F “dying” all the time. ENVI II have already achieved many things being the only committee “smart enough not to lock themselves out of their room” after the fire drill. My committee decided not to tell me anything about this drill, so I was in quite a panic as the bells began ringing. Thanks guys! During committee work some secrets were revealed, such as “being able to color inside the lines” and “having the skills to sing the alphabet backwards”. A message to all session attendants: Be aware, a certain member of ENVI II can “read minds” and this should be more than useful in GA. The delegates are highly complex characters, wanting to transform themselves into foods such as “lasagne” and “potatoes”. Things became very intense at some stages throughout their time together. “Dental records” were called upon, as some delegates nearly became face planted on the floor. However, in the words of many - “We really don’t mind violence here at ENVI II”. There are many strong characters in this committee as there are in all committees, but there is something different about these delegates. They exude an inspiring drive and determination to achieve. I am truly very proud of them and I believe that this group of delegates will succeed in their endeavors.



FEMM; you would think this committee would be all about equality, treating your fellow humans with respect, dignity, and understanding. No name calling, and certainly not a complete lack of trust. But no; “Do not pick a knife because one of us will end up stabbing another person with it” were real words uttered during a game of Plane Crash. In the end, the solution was to base all survival advice from Katy Perry’s Roar – and what has Hollywood got wrong before, anyway? Besides, survival was not exactly on top of the minds of FEMM, as they ended up bursting a bottle of water on the floor (behold the little “accident”) and, of course, having a majority rule of Ryan Gosling over Ryan Reynolds; a controversial issue, some may say. But as you know, intelligent reader, it really is Reynolds every time.

Committee work has been extremely cooperative, an element which will ensure that FEMM will shine in GA. Honestly, I wish the best of luck to any committee trying to rival them tomorrow. FEMM tackled every aspect of their topic with esteem, capacity and skill. I was initially very impressed by their individual factual findings presented at the start of committee work, and obviously they did nothing but build on this greatly. And, of course, the problem of a lack of paid paternity leave will be solved with great efficiency by such informed, logical and capable European youth parliamentarians.

Gossip flew around FEMM’s committee room, since luckily enough, everyone’s perfect date was recognised and is simply waiting to be catered for. Who wants a trip to New York with one of the good-looking and intelligent members of the committee on gender equality? In all seriousness, FEMM are truly well on their way to completing their great resolution. There is excellent chemistry and banter throughout the committee, with constant laughter, one in particular seems to have constant giggles. This does nothing but raise spirits!



Rumour Has It... By Brendan Byrne Tensions were rife in the sweaty committee room of IMCO, where they struggled to lift a metal pole that I estimate to have weighed less than 500mg. This was between seven strapping delegates. However, IMCO’s problem was not that they were too weak, quite the opposite. IMCO found out that they were too strong for their own good. The delegates fought a long, arduous, and quite frankly dull battle to keep the stick level. I literally had to start rumours about the delegates to keep myself occupied! Rather than beating around the bush, the committee dived right in to try and crack the code, computer code that is. Struggling with the diverse and complex issues of personal data, the committee blasted through their early work, identifying the problems, and creating solutions. Although the committee almost attempted to set up an autocratic, all powerful, God-like central data base, through foresight they were able to avoid a creation of a tyrannical organisation. I could continue to write about the committee’s groundbreaking work, and their many tangents, including TV shows such as South Park, and the birthplace of “Dear Leader, who is a perfect incarnation of the appearance that a leader should have, Highest Incarnation of the Revolutionary Comradely Love, Kim Jong-il”. However, I’d prefer to write about a hilarious Energiser that was played.


For those of you unfamiliar with “The Polo Game”, the concept is simple. Put a matchstick in your mouth, put a polo on your matchstick, turn to your fellow delegate, and slide the polo onto their matchstick. However, this was made more complicated by adding a bottle that had to be passed at the knees. To say love is in the air would be an understatement! However, I think the quote which took the biscuit was when the delegates completed the circle, and the last delegate shouted “Is it in?!” The relief evident in their voice. To say the response “Yeeees! Oh God...” captures the spirit of this brave and glorious committee is no word of a lie.


Mad Scientists, or with a Vision? By Lola Hourihane

Scientists have long held a reputation for questionable morals - take a look at many recent superhero films and this becomes extremely clear. In Ironman 3, the genetically modified humans use their super-heat powers for evil. In The Amazing Spiderman (the one with Andrew Garfield), Dr Curtis Connors miraculously discovers a wonderful serum for cell regeneration, and then uses it to become a lizard overlord who terrorises New York; let’s not even get started on Dr Frankenstein. Consequently, it appears that science necessitates unethical behaviour – but is this the case in ITRE? When I entered the committee room on Friday evening, I witnessed behaviour I had never expected from such supposedly upstanding EU citizens: they were auctioning each other off. Among the choice lines of the ‘game’ was, “We cannot buy you if you cannot dance.” Can we trust people who think that buying and selling their theatrically talented friends is acceptable? These delegates are supposed to be making a huge decision regarding the future of funding for research in Europe, and yet one of them had to be told that, “you cannot draw any fake money, sir”. These are people with no limits or moral boundaries, and who fear no punishment for unethical behaviour - apparently they have “no fears that have not been dead for 65 million years”.

Perhaps they are not all bad, though – at the end of the auction they were asked to “do something nice for the people you have bought”, so it seems that they may actually treat their human property well. The issue of where funding for research comes from is most certainly one concerning ethics; sourcing funds from private institutions can lead to altered results in important experiments. Are these delegates simply depraved scientists with no moral boundaries, prepared to overlook any problems with the validity of their results to get funding? Or, will this “good crew that work well together” manage to finally strike the balance between competitive in science, and ethical research? Either way, ITRE is a code-cracking, jellyfish-imitating, chair-hopping, street-fighting, samauri-defeating, relatively focused team of delegate super-ninjas with unnaturally strong fingers. This is a dynamic group of aspiring flying superheroes with strong opinions on their favourite shades of unicorn and a pony in their committee chant. ITRE: two chairs, twelve actual chairs, seven delegates, three hundred and twenty teeth, an infinite number of ideas, one unbelievably talented, beautiful and creative journalist, 10 brains and one goal: to write a bulletproof, flawless resolution on the ethics of funding for research. Will they succeed? We will just have to wait and see.



Under Surveillance By Harry Heath Although it might sound a bit hackneyed, it has been a real pleasure getting to know the members of the SEDE committee and I am in no doubt that the group of people who were strangers at the beginning of Friday are now good friends. After less than an hour of team building the group seemed to form an easy rapport and they all seemed very comfortable in each other’s company. This lack of hesitance meant that it was easy for the group to take part in the bonding games that can be very difficult to do if everyone is too shy and reserved. Early on, a noteworthy game was when people wrote on each others backs certain characteristics, such as which animal they most look like. We discovered that the group had two oak trees, a beech tree and a rose (also I was daisy, which I’m determined to take as a compliment). We also found out that we had a Billie Joe Armstrong and a Penelope Cruz, although personally I could not see the resemblance of one of the group to Morgan Freeman, but then again maybe I’m just a little shortsighted.


Later in the day the group successfully turned themselves into a robot with five feet, four arms, two heads and a tail, which did not take too long. It is far harder than it sounds; hopping on one foot whilst holding a person up in the air is not an easy task at all. The group’s willingness to engage in more physical team building games was admirable, although I think it sometimes verged on the violent side! I have never seen the game where people are pushed ‘gently’ around in a circle played with so much vigour and force, plus I hear the game of ‘Wizards, Giants and Dwarves’ with ENVI 2 was pretty intense as well; I certainly hope that no one was bruised or damaged by their experience but everyone still seems friendly so one can assume that there is no ill will between them. Fingers crossed anyway. Watching SEDE begin working on their committee work on Saturday makes me sure that they will put together an intelligent and compelling argument for how Europe should act on the NSA spying revelations. The foundations that were laid by team building on Friday will be immensely helpful in both Committee Work and General Assembly and I am in no doubt that SEDE will reflect on their team building experiences with great fondness in the future.

EYP Limerick-Poem By Lola Hourihane

Friday evening is fun and games Throwing balls and learning names Ninja battles and fighting on the streets, (And there’s always that delegate who secretly cheats) Coming up with some teamwork aims On Saturday the stiff arguments are igniting Discussions, debates, and sometimes there’s fighting A chance to share some opinions and views And get up to date on EU news By thinking, drafting, and re-writing Sunday brings resolution-consideration With each proposal being put through intense deliberation Speeches by all, and placards used incorrectly (Especially that one for responding directly) Then voting on resolutions for every EU nation On Sunday evening we gather as one In a time to reflect on all that has been done All conflicts from GA have ended Everyone thinks of the people they have befriended It’s sad that it is over, but sure has been fun.


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Issue 2 - The Citizens