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SHALOM BAYIS A. Importance: 1. Sichos Musar 2. “8 secrets”, security, happy, respect for parents, self image 3. Middos, “shtender story”; Simchas Hachayim, learning

B. Advice:

1. Different backgrounds, Dan L’Kaf Zchussilverware, Erev Shabbos, cooking, laundry, IT'S NOT BECAUSE HE DOESN'T CARE ABOUT YOU compartmentalize (inoculation) 2. Disappointment is the difference between expectations and reality“10 second rule”, smile (sight has the farthest reach), let him go first 3. People are not robots 4. Expressive- clear, positive, timing is important 5. Forgiving- partnership 6. Hakaras Hatov- be specific

7. Mars and Venus- 1) discussion v. solution 2) compatmentalize

8. The big picture- if need to criticize, think about the positives try to praise first 9. Love- 1) “Hav” 2) If it matters to you, it matters to me 10. Time issues- 1) try not to interrupt 2) timing is important 3) positive encouragement 4) be sympathetic to his time pressures 5) help him spend time with you- be available 11. Compromise- Rav Twerski's Mezuzah mashal 12. The Shabbos table

Shalom Bayis