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LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

NOVEMBER 2012

A Journey In The Light Ministries Living, Reaching, Teaching, Preaching the Word of God in Unity

Pastor Danny L. Medell

A full gospel ministry that still teaches Christ, Him crucified and the message of the cross.

2231 S Bluff Wichita, KS 67218 Pastor’s Phone: (316) 925-1102 www.journeyinthelightministries.com

We are a church that accepts everyone regardless of their race, color, social status, sexual orientation, where they are or where they have been in life.

We invite you to join us for worship every Sunday at 11:00 am

Find Liberty Press here! Dodge City

Dodge City High School, Hastings Books & Video

El Dorado

Pathways Psychological Services

Hays

Open Roads Community

Center

Hutchinson

Kansas Equality Coalition meetings

Joplin, MO

Spirit of Christ Metropolitan Community Church

Junction City

Xcalibur Club

Kansas City

Hamburger Mary’s

Lawrence

Aimee’s Coffeehouse, Bourgeois Pig, Community Mercantile, Douglas County AIDS Project, Dusty Bookshelf, Ecumenical

Christian Ministries, Einstein Bros. Bagel, Hashinger Hall, Henry’s, Java Break, KU’s Dean of Students office, KU’s Multicultural Resource Center, La Prima Tazza, Lawrence Public Library, Local Burger, Love Garden Sounds, Milton’s, The Mirth Café, NetworQ, Queers & Allies office, The Raven Bookstore, Rudy’s Pizzeria, Teller’s, Third Planet, Wheatfield’s Bakery, Wilde’s Chateau 24, Yello Sub, Z’s Divine Espresso

Manhattan

The Bluestem Bistro, The Chef Café, Dusty Bookshelf, Ecumenical Campus Ministry, First Congregational Church, Flint Hills Human Right Project meetings, K-State LGBT Resource Center, K-State Student Union, K-State Women’s Center, On the Wild Side, People’s Grocery, Queer-Straight Alliance meetings, Radina’s Bakery & Café (two locations), Rockstar and Rodgers, Sisters of Sound Music, StreckerNelson Gallery, Unitarian

Universalist Fellowship of Manhattan, Varsity Donuts

Pittsburg

Body Intuition, Pitt State GSA meetings

Salina

Saline County Health Dept.

Topeka

The Blue Planet, The Break Room, Classic Bean (two locations), Field of Greens, Flowers by Bill, Lazio’s Coffee Bar, Metropolitan Community Church of Topeka, Positive Connections, PT’s Coffee Roasting Co., The Razor’s Edge, Reece Nichols Real Estate, Skivvies, Three Flowers Metaphysical, Topeka/ Shawnee County Public Library, The Upstage Gallery, Washburn Mabee Library, Washburn Union, YWCA

Wichita

Adult Superstore, After Dark South, The Anchor, Barnes & Noble, Bella Luna Cafe - East Central location, Bungalow 26, The Center, Circle Cinema,

City Arts, College Hill United Methodist Church, Crazy J’s Furniture & Sleep Shop, The Donut Whole, Fetish Lingerie, Fisch Haus, First Metropolitan Community Church, First Unitarian Universalist Church, Harris & Co. Frame Shop, Hunter Health Clinic, J’s Lounge, Journey in the Light, Junk in the Trunk, Kirby’s, KMUW, KU Internal Medicine - Midtown, Mead’s Corner, Moe’s Sub Shop, Monica’s Bundt Cake Co., Mystic Planet, Our Fantasy Complex, Patricia’s, Peace & Social Justice Center, Pine Valley Christian Church, Planet Hair, Planned Parenthood, Positive Directions, Rain Café & Lounge, Side Street Retro Lounge, Spice Merchant, The Store, Twist Yarn Shop, Vagabond Coffeeshop, Vegas Video, Watermark Books, Wichita Community Theatre, Wichita Public Library downtown, WSU - Rhatigan Student Center (info desk), WSU - That Gay Group meetings, WSU - Women’s Studies office, Xcitement Video

Would you like to see your business or organization on this list? It’s free! Contact Kristi at editor@libertypress.net to arrange for delivery of complimentary copies.


NOVEMBER 2012

Liberty Press

Volume 19, No. 3 • Editor: Kristi Parker • Contributors: Paul Berge, Ben Breese, Dave Brousseau, Nolin Christensen, Danny Cooper, Steve Einsel, Greg Fox, Dan Henderson, Charlene Lichtenstein, Mama, W. Brian Martz, Audrey McQueen, Dorothy Miller, Dr. Robert N. Minor, Stephanie Mott, Ben Rivers • Staff Reporters: Cole Anneberg, Helen Barnes, Amanda Barr, Angie Combs, Alisha Petersen, Ciara Reid • Contributing Photographers: Amanda Barr, Ben Breese, Bill Brittendall, Camirand, Ron Josh • Cover Design: Troy Dilport • Graphic Designer: Troy Dilport • Webmaster: Ren Autrey • Publisher: The Liberty Press

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

LGBTQ community should take notice of National Caregiver Month Page 21 It’s back!!

Subscriptions are $18/year

The “Liberty Press” and its contents may not be reproduced in any manner, either in whole or in part, without the express written consent of the publisher. All rights reserved. Unsolicited material may not necessarily be acknowledged or returned, is assumed intended for publication unless otherwise stated, and becomes the sole property of the Liberty Press. Letters to the editor and bylined columns reflect the views and opinions of the authors only and are not necessarily those of the Liberty Press, LLC or its staff. The Liberty Press reserves the right to refuse or restrict advertisements at the editor’s discretion. Advertisers and agencies assume liability for claims arising from the content of their ads. Publication of the name, photograph or likeness of any persons, organization or business in articles or advertisements in the Liberty Press in no way indicates or reflects their sexual orientation. First copy free, additional copies may be obtained for a nominal fee from the publisher.

P.O. Box 16315 Wichita, KS 67216-0315 phone: (316) 652-PRESS [7737] e-mail: editor@libertypress.net www.libertypress.net © 2012 The Liberty Press

Page 5

On the Cover:

CONTENTS ARTAID embraces change.............................................................................. 8 WICHITA BEARS VICE-PRESIDENT cooks up chili for diabetes................15 QUEER MUSLIM ACTIVIST comes to K-State...........................................15 WATCHING - AND WORKING FOR - CIRQUE DU SOLEIL is pure entertainment..................................................................................16 RED RIBBON ART AUCTION celebrates 20 years....................................22 BEARS GOT TALENT: La Cage raises $1,300 for food pantry.................25 LOCAL GAY COMPOSER behind music and lyrics of The Forum’s A Christmas Carol...............................................................................29 WORLD AIDS DAY EVENTS across the state...........................................30 ESTATE PLANNING for same-sex couples..............................................33

Regulars OP/ED Poll results, editorial cartoon, Comments from the Web.......... 6-7 BOTH SIDES OF THE FENCE Obama.........................................................6 MINOR DETAILS Could Fundamentalists Exist Without Being Motivated by Hate?.........................................................................13 THE JOYS OF RAISING JACK Special Olympics........................................14 WICHITA BEARS PICNIC BASKET Low Fat Pumpkin Pie..........................15 PICTURE PAGE Wichita Pride Parade, Emma’s Revolution Concert, Wichita Pride Festival, National Coming Out Day....................................................18 LEATHER LIFE AIDS and Leather...........................................................19 BOOKENDS Does This Baby Make Me Look Straight and Cowboys, Armageddon and The Truth.............................................................20 TRANS-FORMATIVE Trans-Surgery: Part Nine........................................26 AUDREY ASKS Godiva Romance............................................................27 MOVIE MINUTE Arbitrage.......................................................................32

The Liberty Press distributes 4,000 copies a month in cities throughout Kansas, including Dodge City, Lawrence, Topeka, Wichita, Manhattan, Junction City, Hutchinson, El Dorado, Hays, Kansas City, Pittsburg and Salina.

We Accept

Online Readers Poll Where are you spending Thanksgiving? Visit

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to cast your vote!

IN EVERY ISSUE POINTS OF INTEREST.................. 9 MAMA KNOWS BEST.................. 24 NEWS BRIEFS.......................28-29 COMICS....................................... 36 BRIDGES..................................... 36 CLASSIFIEDS.............................. 37 OUT IN THE STARS.................... 37

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PAGE 6

OP/ED

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

NOVEMBER 2012

Both Sides of the Fence

A Monthly Collection of Opinions and Editorials.

The opinions represented here do not necessarily represent the opinions of the Liberty Press. We reserve the right to edit and cut submissions for space and grammatical content.

Online Readers Poll

6%

Results! Who are you voting for in November’s election? Barack Oba Mitt Romne Gary Johns Not Voting 8. 23%

23 8

2. 26%

2. 6%

Barack Obama

2

23. 65%

Mitt Romney Barack Obama 23. 65%

Mitt Romney

Gary Johnson Gary Johnson Not Voting

Not Voting

FROM THE RIGHT:

FROM THE LEFT:

W

E

Dan “The Yes Man” Henderson

ith the threat of another four years looming, I have to ask: how did the Democratic Party obtain the status as champion of gay rights? Possibly from the misconception that Republicans are straight, repressed, homophobes who seek to control gay “tendencies” by controlling certain perceived rights? Surely a gay person would no longer want to be gay if he’s not allowed to legally marry, right? Um, no, that’s not how being gay works and as for continued on page 28

Win a free LGBT movie pack at www.libertypress.net!

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Cristo Ray High School 211 W. Linwood Blvd Kansas City, Mo 64111

Dec 1st & 2nd Saturday 10-6 Sunday 10-5 Bring in this ad for a FREE Raffle Ticket!

Danny Cooper

veryone is wondering what the role of the economy will be in this year ’s election. Luckily for Obama, the economy has been getting better. Recent numbers have shown national unemployment at pre-Obama numbers of around 7.8%. The idea Republicans continue to harp on is this just isn’t good enough, and it isn’t. It is important to add up all factors when judging the economy. The right wishes you to believe that the President is the sole person continued on page 28


NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Comments from the Web “I just wanted to tell you that I am glad you guys are still around. Thanks for all you do. You are a great role model for all of us LGBT folks, working hard for our community.” --Wichita, KS “Bob Minor’s October column “What’s Love Worth, After All?” was beautiful and powerful. Very inspiring and much needed. Thank you!” --no location given “I love your magazine, omg; love reading the stories and Mama Knows Best.” --Topeka, KS “I hope you have many more issues and I thought your ‘parenting’thoughts were good. I think the community/ movement does not know the value of work like yours, in that part of the nation - sorry you are not as ‘sexy’ as the publications in major cities, but we will not be ‘equal’ until all of the country is educated.” --Bossier City, LA “I saw two films at the [Tallgrass Film] Festival - Call Me Kuchu and The Right to Love. They were both excellent. Thanks for your sponsorship - you are everywhere doing such great work.” --Wichita, KS

 Page 7



 

   




PAGE 8

By Amanda Barr

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

ArtAID embraces change

WICHITA - To yield more room for corporate sponsorships and a burgeoning fan-base, members of the ArtAID board announced their decision to host their charity event biennially in 2011. Now, ArtAID has updated its look by changing venues and, at the tender age of 18, shines like a young starlet, as captivating as ever with no signs of slowing down. On Oct. 13 inside Century II, ArtAID 18 opened its doors to ticket buyers at 7:30pm for a silent auction. 180 pieces of donated visual art silently formed a bright, curving wall along the edges of the Convention Hall, waiting to dance with the eyes of those who approached. The audience then vied for a selected 22 of the artworks presented by shirtless muscled men and spunky roller derby girls – during a live auction. The height of the dynamic visuals began around 10:15pm, when music and video signaled the beginning of the runway show, encompassing 36 performers and

56 models. The show featured choreography and adornments inspired by the event’s theme, “Hollywood Lights.” Awaiting the fashion show, tables buzzed with newcomers filled with curiosity and eagerness. “I came to see what all the hubbub was about!” shared Austin Scott, who joined my table before again abandoning his seat to mingle. He stated that he had friends from all corners of the city, including models, art gallery owners, and those in the gay community, who had urged him to attend. The performances lived up to the gossip, for a sassy, climatic display. Twirling high above the stage from drapes of ribbon, executing double cartwheels (in dresses so as to simulate tumbleweeds), flipping on spring-loaded stilts, and balancing, swinging, and stacking themselves upon each other, acrobatic dancers dazzled the audience. Striding models punctuated the dance acts, forming an eclectic collection of personalities and style, ranging from current trends found in

NOVEMBER 2012

Photo by Amanda Barr

Wichita’s boutiques to costume wear influenced by various films, reaching from the territory of Oz to outer space. Given the professional level of the fine and visual arts presentations, the audience might have found it revelatory that ArtAID sources its talent from Wichita – and that the performers only get three rehearsals! Jill Miller, a member of the ArtAID board, further elaborated on these details, explaining that for those trying to enhance their creative careers, the event offers both exposure and experience. Participation sometimes supplies other perks as well, such as a free ticket, inclusion in the program, or the adrenaline rush of being onstage. Most important, those involved can feel uplifted by their cause, as all proceeds benefit Positive Directions, Inc. This nonprofit offers HIV-prevention programs and furnishes important services to those with HIV and AIDS

and their loved ones in the local community. Since its inception, ArtAID has raised over $1.5 million dollars to support such efforts. The success of ArtAID reflects the dedication of many, including notable contributions from Greteman Group and the persistent efforts of Graham Ross and Tod Ernst, who own Planet Hair and founded the event. These two men continue to oversee ArtAID from its conception to production. Taylor Watson, who modeled this year, commented that even during the hectic moments backstage, that the Planet Hair team “really enjoy doing the show, and you can tell by how much [work] they put into it.” To keep up apace with the passion and fashion, bookmark ArtAID’s website www.artaidks. org or find out about more fundraising projects that benefit Positive Directions at www. pdiks.com. l


NOVEMBER 2012

2 Attics Antique Mall adds café on Fridays and Saturdays and catering PARK CITY - 2 Attics Antique Mall and Estate Liquidation Services is now serving lunch on Fridays and Saturdays from 11am–2pm. They also offer baked goods daily, and catering for special events. The standard weekend menu offers barbecue burritos, turkey club sandwiches and creamed tacos. Desserts include carrot cake, lemon bars, whiskey bacon chocolate chip cookies and whisky raisin oatmeal cookies.

Bo Burnham

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Page 9

Pointsof Interest Compiled by Kristi Parker

In addition to the permanent menu, special soups and sandwiches will be offered and vary from week to week. Kirby Melugin, owner, has also instituted catering services for special group dinners. He also plans to expand the days and times of the café operation as business increases, and specifically wants to provide “down home” meals. The barbeque burritos are also available in frozen sixpacks to take home. Carrot cake and other desserts are available to be purchased whole. For details about food and catering, contact Kirby at 316201-1828 or kirbymelugin@ hotmail.com. 2 Attics is located at 1534 E. 61st S. N., in Park City and is open every day.

Find unique gift ideas at Wichita Alternative Gift Market W I C H I TA Solve hard to buy gift problems at the 18th annual Alternative Gift Market, Saturday, Nov. 19 at Grace Presbyterian Church, 5002 E. Douglas. The market will be open from 9am-

4pm. An alternative Gift Market offers a wide variety of gifts that are tax-deductible and support local and global humanitarian and environmental causes. At the market, shoppers can visit informative displays about local and worldwide projects. They can purchase items for the causes that they select and will receive cards with descriptive inserts about their gifts. The cards can

be personalized and sent to friends and relatives, informing them of the alternative gift given in their honor. For more information visit alternativegiftmarketwichita. wordpress.com or www.facebook.com/ wichitaalternativegiftmarket.

Ault

WSU to host comedian Bo Burnham

“BOSHO” may be used during Select-a-Seat checkout.

WICHITA - Wichita State’s Student Activities Council will host Bo Burnham, LIVE! at 8pm Friday, Nov. 16, at the WSU Hughes Metropolitan Complex at 29th Street North and Oliver. Doors will open at 7pm. Tickets are $7 for students and $10 for the general public. The comedy show will feature opening act Cy Amundson. Burnham is a YouTube sensation who began his career by recording videos in his attic. He soon took the comedy world by storm, becoming the youngest person to record a Comedy Central special. His newest stage show combines comedy with music, and tackles topics from gender to human sexuality. Student tickets may be purchased with a WSU student ID and cash only at Student Involvement, located in the 3rd floor ballroom at the Rhatigan Student Center. General public tickets may be purchased at Student Involvement, through Select-aSeat outlets or at the door on the night of the show. Coupons for $2 off tickets are also available in Student Involvement, or the promo code

Former death row warden to speak in Olathe OLATHE – Former death row warden Allen Ault will give the keynote address at the 2012 Abolition Conference, sponsored by the Kansas Coalition Against the Death Penalty. Ault’s speech will discuss the traumatic effects of capital punishment on the corrections officials responsible for carrying out executions. During his time as a death row warden in Georgia, Ault had the responsibility of overseeing executions. These experiences had a traumatic impact on Ault and many of the correctional officers with whom he worked. On Saturday, Nov. 10 at 1:30pm at Center of Grace, 520 S. Harrison St., Ault will share his concerns about the death penalty. Ault’s address is part of the 2012 Abolition Conference. Following Ault’s address, there will be educational workshops focusing on different aspects of the death penalty. The conference is free and open to the public. l


PAGE 10

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

THE GODFATHER

2012 aNNiverSary FiLm SerieS preSeNTed by empriSe baNK

THUrSday, November 15 • 7 p.m.

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CHRIS ISAAK BEYOND THE SUN TOUR

SUNday, deCember 2 • 7 p.m.

MORELAND AND ARBUCKLE rooTS roCK From THe HearTLaNd

Friday, deCember 7 • 8 p.m.

AMERICAN ENGLISH ON THE ANNIVERSARY OF JOHN LENNON’S DEATH

SaTUrday, deCember 8 • 8 p.m.

ROBERT CRAy BAND

Grammy WiNNiNG bLUeS roCK GUiTariST

THUrSday, deCember 13 • 8 p.m.

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oN a WiNTer’S NiGHT | preSeNTed by LarKSFieLd pLaCe

TUeSday, deCember 18 • 7:30 p.m. Reserved tickets available through Select-A-Seat: 316.755.7328, selectaseat.com, Dillons Superstores, & Plant Employee Clubs.

www.wichitaorpheum.com

NOVEMBER 2012


NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Page 11

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LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

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PAGE 12

PRESENTS:

NOVEMBER 2012

NOVEMBER 29 - DECEMBER 23 This haunting retelling of the classic tale of Ebenezer Scrooge and his ultimate redemption, stars Karla Burns, Ray Wills, and Paul Jackson as Scrooge.

Charles Dickens

AChristmas

Carol

"Christmas Carol breathes new life into classic. Thrilling, complex,

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thoroughly listenable musical! Bravo!� ***Bob Curtright, Wichita Eagle

A Spirited New Musical!

JANUARY 10 - FEBRUARY 3 A side-splitting cross-dressing, gender-bending spoof. Two men, eight characters, and forty eight

The Mystery of

IRMA VEP

quick costume changes. Werewolves, Vampires, and Mummies... Oh My!

147 S. Hillside Wichita, KS 67211

By far and away, the funniest two hours on a New York stage. **NY Times

Chuckles & Chills!


NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Minor

Details By Bob Minor

Could Fundamentalists Exist Without Being Motivated by Hate? 14th Anniversary Column!

T

hat’s the gist of an all too common question. And when looking at the daily news, there’s clear reason for asking it. Recently we saw again what can happen when anti-Muslim Christians - this time using a film – chose to rile up anti-Christian Muslims. It’s as if both sides in such feuds thrive on the hatred of the other. And the psychological reality is, they do. Extreme right-wing religions play on the fears and insecurities of people growing up in a world that installs these in its children through what the late child psychologist Alice Miller calls “poisonous pedagogy.” In fact, their theologies enshrine and sanctify such childrearing practices. “There are countless theological explanations for the motives behind God’s inscrutable counsels,” Miller writes in The Truth Will Set You Free (2001), “but in all too many of them I see a terrorized child trying hard to interpret the mysterious actions of the [punishing] parent as good and loving, even though the child cannot fathom them – indeed has no chance of fathoming them.” Right-wing religion attempts to convince its followers that they can’t trust their own thinking, their own intuitions, and their own voices. They’re too vile, self-deceiving, lowly, fallen, finite, or just too “human.” It strives to install the selfevaluation behind all addictions – a low self-concept. And that self-loathing is no mere misunderstanding correctable through counseling; it’s an accurate measure of who one

really is. This means people must learn to become “obedient” to something other than their own inner voice. That something might be called scripture, god, the faith, the Truth, revelation, the Church, or tradition, but the obedience demanded is really to institutions and authoritative leaders who’ll define what scripture, god, etc. are and what they teach for people who’ve been told that they aren’t capable of defining those things for themselves. A low self-concept, one in this case enforced by right-wing religious teachings, develops personalities who need to rely on something better than themselves to feel good about themselves. And the religious leaders just happen to have that Something ready and waiting. We shouldn’t be surprised, then, that right-wing religion idealizes “childlike faith,” or “childlike obedience” and talks about its followers as “children” of the Divine. We shouldn’t be surprised that it pushes teenage or adult-style questioning to the outside as heterodoxy, infidelity, and heresy. And the “children” they are to be are like those they raise with “poisonous pedagogy.” They are like little ones who believe that their parents are perfect and can only love perfect parents. There’s no grown-up love that admits the flaws in others and loves them anyway. When these religions are used in the cause of a country’s nationalism, their nationalism hates when someone criticizes their own country. It labels that unpatriotic because even their love of country resembles “love” that is immature. And we know that just as children often think of things in binaries such as black and white,

so does addictive thinking. There can be no nuance or shades of gray in right-wing religion. There must be either friends or enemies of the faith. There’s nothing in between. Those who are the agents of darkness are necessary as “others.” “They” make us feel righteous. “They” exist to prove we are not wrong. “They” provide the face of the enemy. “They” are easier to fight than our own demons within. So, our righteousness ramps up and is justified in “hating the sin” that those sinners represent. “They” provide the face of fear. “They” remind us of why we need to cling to our religion and guns. “They” keep the battle going, a battle that requires time and money. “They” keep the finances coming in to religious leaders who keep reminding us of the threat “they” pose. And the existence of “they” brings, beyond the cash it raises, a most important psychological need for the nobody preachers like the funeral picketer from Topeka, or the Koran burner from Gainesville. It brings them the attention they failed to get from daddy and mommy. It validates that they’re actually okay in the midst of their unbelief in the power of their god. It brings them the national spotlight that says they haven’t given their lives to something about which few people care. To keep the sickness going, the enemy must get ever stronger, more evil, and more threatening. It must be further constructed as someone, some group, or some thing that is so awful that the only appropriate response is hate. And no matter how much they might say they hate the sin but love the sinner,

Page 13

the “sinner” will experience the hate as personal. To be the object of such hate is to feel that it’s not just about what one does but also about the “sinner” one is. Ask those who suffered the inquisitions, the witch burnings, the pogroms, the Crusades, or the Holocaust. Ask LGBT people. They’ve never bought into the “love the sinner, hate the sin” distinction – a phrase never found in the Christian Bible - unless they’ve already been taught a low selfconcept by the people who justify their beliefs with the distinction. They’ve felt how much it’s the self-serving lipservice of those who want them straight. Whatever happened to the old bumper stickers that said “Hate is not a family value?” Did the right-wing bully the rest of us into removing what was a clear statement of the issue? Did they intimidate us by saying, “You’re not accusing us of hate, are you?” And did we back down because we didn’t want to call their bigotry, prejudice, and crusades hate? Are we afraid to talk about “hate speech?” Are we afraid to call the demonizing of the other “hate?” Are we afraid to do what might be seen as an intervention in religious addiction? Much sickness lies behind right-wing hatred of those they see as their enemies. So we mustn’t be surprised that for right-wing religion anyone who even defends the “other” will become “other.” l Robert N. Minor, Ph.D., Professor Emeritus of Religious Studies at the University of Kansas, is author of When Religion Is an Addiction; Scared Straight: Why It’s So Hard to Accept Gay People and Why It’s So Hard to Be Human and Gay & Healthy in a Sick Society. Contact him at www. FairnessProject.org.


PAGE 14

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Special Olympics

G

etting Jack involved in Special Olympics turned out to be a magnificent idea. I say that with a bit of trepidation because it was my ex’s idea and while she actually has a master’s degree in special education, the fact is I hardly ever give her much credit. There. I said it. So, after basketball season was over and was such a resounding success we went into the next season of sports with much enthusiasm. Jack had looked over the list and decided he wanted to play tennis. “Tennis?” My ex and I both asked on separate occasions; a little leery of Jack’s coordination to handle such a sport as tennis. I thought the reason Jack wanted to play tennis was because he is a whiz at Wii tennis and ping pong and several other virtual racquet sports. Explaining the difference between the virtual world and the real world just wasn’t sinking in with him though. So off we go to the first tennis practice. Right off the bat, er … racquet, Jack is struggling. He’s trying to bounce the ball repeatedly against the ground and it is going everywhere except back up against the racquet. I can tell he’s getting frustrated. Conveniently, the tennis team practices at the same place as the track team. While Jack is distracted with the formidable task of trying to bounce the ball against a wall, I sneak away and

NOVEMBER 2012

ask the track coach, who just happened to be his old basketball coach, if it is too late for Jack to switch to track. It’s not. I go back over to the tennis area and rescue Jack from the wall. “Honey, what do you think about switching over to track and field and trying that instead of tennis?” I say persuadingly. “Some of your basketball buddies are over at track and I think you’ll have more fun. Yes, he says, he thinks maybe he would like to do that after all. As we are walking over, past the bleachers and through the fence on to the track, Jack turns to me very seriously and says, “Mom, I’ll do track and all, as long as they don’t make me do the pole vault.” When Jack was 22 months old, he still wasn’t talking. Wasn’t trying to talk, wasn’t babbling, nothing. He had said, “Mama” to me when he was eight months old, but then he started trying to walk and it was like his brain could only focus on one thing at a time and the talking stopped. Vinnie and I wanted to take him to speech therapy, but we needed a referral from our pediatrician. He wouldn’t sign off on it. “You’re new, first-time mothers,” he said. “Give it some time. He’s fine.” Luckily we didn’t listen. We went around him and soon were taking Jack to a pediatric speech therapist at one of the local hospitals. For $75 every 15 minutes - I kid you not - the therapist sat on the floor with Jack, and a ball, and went, “Buh, buh, buh, ball. Now you try it. Buh, buh . . .” The insurance only covered half. After our portion of the bill reached about $900 we started researching other options. We found a wonderful preschool at the Speech, Language and Hearing Clinic at Wichita State University that worked with kids with speech delays, among other things. Called Kaleidoscope, it was staffed by graduate students in all sorts of disciplines, one of them being speech therapy. However, Jack couldn’t start till he was two and a half. We added him to the long waiting list and continued searching. l


NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Page 15

Wichita Bears vice-president cooks up chili for diabetes

By Benjamin Breese, president Wichita Bears

WICHITA - If you were driving around Old Town on Saturday, Sept. 29 and you thought you could smell chili, it wasn’t your olfactory nerves working overtime or trying to fool you. Saturday was the day of the 2012 Wichita Wagonmasters Downtown Chili Cookoff. This year the promoters of the yearly chili cookoff included a category for charities. The Chili for Charity category is a new competition limited to nonprofit organizations looking to gain exposure for their cause. Curtis Isley, Executive Sous Chef from the Hyatt Regency, was called upon to use his culinary skills to prepare chili for the American Diabetes Association of Wichita. Isley, the vice-president of the Wichita Bears, first got into food service at Biscuitville in North Carolina. He obtained his training and degree in North

Wichita Bears Picnic Basket

By Chef Curtis

Low Fat Pumpkin Pie Pre-heat oven to 350 degrees Ingredients: 1 pre-made pie crust (bake for 10 mins before using) 1 small pie pumpkin cut in half roasted with seeds still in pumpkin 1 tbsp vanilla 1 tbsp cinnamon 1/4 tsp clove 1/2 tsp Ginger 1/4 tsp Allspice 2 tsp baking powder 1/2 Cup Estivia Sugar substitute 1 Cup egg beaters 1 Cup no fat Half & Half Chef Curtis Isley hands out samples at the Chili Cookoff. Photo by Ben Breese

Carolina and moved to Wichita to help open the Hyatt Regency in 1997. He then moved to Atlanta, working at Marriott and Peachtree Conference Center before moving back to Wichita

Queer Muslim activist comes to K-State

MANHATTAN - Faisal Alam, a queer-identified Muslim activist of Pakistani descent, started an e-mail discussion list for LGBT Muslims. He was only 18 and struggling to reconcile his faith with his sexuality. In turn he created the first place queer Muslims could come together “virtually” in a safe space to discuss the challenges they faced in their lives. The e-mail discussion list led to Alam organizing the first-ever gathering of LGBT Muslims, held in 1998, bringing together 40 people from six

countries. This gathering led to the founding of Al-Fatiha (“The Beginning”), an organization for LGBT & questioning Muslims, and their allies. Alam served as Al-Fatiha’s volunteer director from1998-2005. Alam’s protests against the rising Islamophobia and the assault on civil liberties and civil rights in the U.S. have led conservative elements within the gay community to call for his deportation, while some conservative gay journalists have called him “weak” and “cowardly,” for his opposition to the socalled “war on terror.” Faisal Alam will be coming to Kansas State University on Tuesday, Nov. 27 at 7pm in the School of Leadership Studies Town Hall. For more information, visit the LGBT Resource Center at www.k-state. edu/lgbt or e-mail lgbt@k-state.edu. l

1. Bake pie pumpkin until soft, 30-40 mins. Let cool. Remove seeds, and scrape out meat of pumpkin. 2. Put all ingredients in a bowl and blend until smooth. 3. Pour in to a baked pie shell. (Cover the edges of crust to help prevent burning.) Bake for 30-45 mins; until center has no giggle. in 1999. The rules for the Chili Cookoff are strict. Cooks are to prepare chili in their assigned booth using their own source of cooking heat. No generators, electricity, or open fires allowed. Charcoal grills may be used providing a fire extinguisher is in the booth. No one may begin cooking until 9am. Meats may be pre-cut or ground but not

treated in any way. Chef Curtis was called upon to prepare a healthy chili on behalf of the Diabetes Association. With Propane burners and without the comforts of the Hyatt kitchen, he prepared a delicious chili and proved healthy food can and does taste great. l Visit www.libertypress.net for Chef Curtis’ chili recipe.


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NOVEMBER 2012

Watching – and working for – Cirque du Soleil is pure entertainment Exclusive interview with Dralion’s company manager By Ciara Reid, staff reporter TOPEKA - For those looking for a little entertainment this winter, look no further than Cirque du Soleil’s show, Dralion. Dralion

Photo by Camirand

combines the 3,000 year-old tradition of Chinese acrobatic arts with the multidisciplinary approach of Cirque du Soleil. The show’s inspiration is Eastern philosophy and discovering a perfect balance between human beings and nature – namely air, water, fire and earth. The show’s name comes from its two symbolic creatures: the dragon, representing the East, and the lion, representing the West. “It’s so unique compared to other Cirque shows,” says Michael Veilleux, the company manager for Dralion. “Fifty percent of the cast is Chinese. It is so different culturally and it’s a great pleasure to discover more about their culture.” Veilleux has been with Cirque du Soleil since 1998. Dralion is his fourth show with the company. For him, working with the company – which has produced consistently innovative and dazzling spectacles for audiences worldwide since 1984 – doesn’t feel like actual work. “It’s a dream job,” he says. “The

word ‘work’ doesn’t really come into it.” A position with the famed acrobatic dance company is highly sought after. Veilleux says they are constantly blown away by how many people apply for a position – as many as 200 pour in when a job is posted. As company manager, Veilleux takes care of the business side of things, including making sure that the employees – whether they’re involved in the business, production or creative side - are informed of their new lifestyle while on tour. Though touring most of the year can be very strenuous on a relationship, Veilleux is one of the lucky ones – his husband also works for Cirque du Soleil, and tours with him on Dralion. Since his husband is on the artistic side of the production, Veilleux says that they have a lot to catch up on at day’s end and get to spend their downtime together. Others are not so lucky to tour with their significant others or families. With 10 weeks on

and two weeks off, many form close friendships with their traveling peers. “When you are away from home and far away – it’s important to develop strong bonds with each other – it can be lonely without that,” he explains. The company is familyoriented – and not just for the audiences, but for the employees as well. Veilleux says that family and friends of the show’s employees attend shows in various cities. It gives them a chance to see their loved ones, and also allows their family to meet their colleagues whom they have formed close bonds with. Those who have not seen a Cirque du Soleil show before, be prepared for a highly acrobatic and visually stimulating performance that will enhance your cultural view. And of course, be prepared to be entertained. l Cirque du Soleil: Dralion opens at the Kansas Expocentre Dec. 5-9. For tickets, visit www.ticketmaster.com.


NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

For More Info: www. k-state.edu/lgbt

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NOVEMBER 2012

Wichita Pride Parade Sept. 30, 2012

WICHITA - This year’s Pride Celebration took place Sept. 2030. Themed “Proud Family,” events included a family picnic, skating party, movie nite and the annual parade and festival. Pictured top left: This year’s Grand Marshalls Kim Roseberry, Darrin Daniels, Ady Gutierrez, and Trinity Daniels. Top middle: The Fantasy float. Above: Miss Gay Wichita 2012 Audrey McQueen. Photos by Ron Josh

Emma’s Revolution Concert Oct. 5, 2012 WICHITA - To celebrate the 125th anniversary of First Unitarian Universalist Church and the 20th anniversary of the Peace & Social Justice Center, Emma’s Revolution played to a small crowd at the church. Pictured above: Pat Humphries and Sandy O. of Emma’s Revolution, which is named after Emma Goldman, an anarchist from the early 1900s. Photo courtesy of Bill Brittendall.

Wichita Pride Festival Sept. 30, 2012 WICHITA - This year’s festival moved back to the Mid-America All-Indian Center. Informational booths, vendors, food and entertainment kept the crowd celebrating the nice fall weather. Pictured above: A festival favorite for several years running, the Dreamers 6 perform as the Village People. Photo by Ron Josh

National Coming Out Day Oct. 11, 2012

WICHITA - National Coming Out Day was marked in Wichita with 13 speakers, free food courtesy of First MCC and informational tables at Chester I. Lewis Reflection Square Park. Pictured top left: A volunteer staffs the Kansas Equality Coalition table. Bottom left: Audience members listen to the speakers in front of The Center’s table. Left: Allen Mairs of The Center addresses the crowd. Photos by Kristi Parker


NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Leather Life By Nolin Christensen aka Master C

This column is dedicated to explaining to others what the Leather lifestyle is about and what we do.

AIDS and Leather

S

a lot of our information and history was passed from one to another by oral communication. We didn’t write it down for fear of it being found and that it would be used against us. We feared that we would lose our jobs, our homes and possibly our lives. For some of our Leather tribe, when families found out that someone in their family was dying from AIDS, the blood family abandoned them out of fear of contracting the disease and the person was left to fend for themselves. Many of our brothers died in isolation. This is where our Leather sisters, the Leatherwomen, stepped in. They came and cared for our sick and dying brothers. They became the Good Samaritans and the Nightingales of the tribe. We today owe so much to these women. With this year’s World AIDS Day theme, Getting to Zero, the Leather community works to help reach this goal. During the early AIDS crisis we adopted a motto of Safe, Sane, Consensual. We have worked hard over the years to teach our tribe and others about these three things. Safe has two meanings for us. One is that the type of play you are engaged in is done safely and with safety precautions. And the other INCLUDES safe sex. For

ince Dec. 1 is World AIDS Day, this month’s article is dedicated to those Leather men and women who have died or helped in the early AIDS crisis. When AIDS struck the gay community in the early 80’s, it hit the Leather community particularly hard. Many of our Leather elders died and a lot of the Leather history and knowledge died with them. So because of this loss, it’s been difficult for our community to re-gather that information. It seems that lots of people profess to know what the various rules and regulations (protocols as we call it) were, “When AIDS struck, it hit the but most do not. As a history buff Leather community particularly I know quite a hard. Leather elders died and a lot bit, but even now of the history died with them.” I’m still learning more and more. The regaining of this knowledge those of us who came out before is what I’m trying to report in the AIDS crisis, this one is hard to do. this monthly article. One of the biggest problems We are seeing more and that happened was after the more people living longer with Leathermen had passed and the disease. This is good, but when families came to claim after all these years of teaching their belongings the family was the community about safe sex, horrified to find out about the we are now seeing a rise in secret life of their loved one. transmissions. More and more This resulted in the loss of the younger people are becoming leather clothing, the loss of any infected. This is bad, very very reference material and the loss bad! Many of today’s youth have of anything connected to the always lived with AIDS in the lifestyle. All of this was thrown world. But what they haven’t into the trash and burned. The seen was the sick and dying; history of our community went our brothers who withered and died. The Leathermen who were up in smoke. Like many ancient tribes, reduced to just skin and bones.

Watching our brothers die before our eyes. The multiple funerals per WEEK we attended. I see this rise in transmissions as two-fold. One is that those that are positive do not disclose their status. WHY? Because many people are not educated on AIDS and they have fear. This fear is causing people in our own community to ostracize HIV-positive individuals. So that they won’t be ostracized, they choose to not tell anyone they are positive. The second problem is that those who are negative don’t think they can get it or that if they do, there is a drug to fix it.

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Trust me, there is NO drug (yet) to “fix” it. There are drugs to help you live with HIV, but this requires doctor’s appointments every two to three months; it requires a STRICT drug regimen, one that you CANNOT miss a dosage. It means multiple drugs, sometimes multiple times a day, for the rest of your life. So this World AIDS Day, let’s all help to accomplish this year’s theme, Getting to Zero. First of all, let’s get to Zero discrimination. Then let us get to Zero deaths! But most of all, let’s get to Zero new infections! Get educated, get tested and always play safe! l


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A

The book starts out with a gut-busting wallop of a story about Bucatinsky’s daughter, which reminds me why I don’t have children at this point in my life. But Bucatinsky goes on to give a loving look at his family, and the process he and his partner went through to adopt their two children. Each chapter ends with a moral lesson learned much like episodes in a sitcom, and while this becomes predictable Bucatinsky’s pace and witty narrative pull the reader in and propel the story forward through his family’s adventures. Not all adventures in life are brought about by joy, as Scott Terry recounts in his memoir, Cowboys, Armageddon, and The Truth: How a Gay Child was Saved from Religion (Lethe Press, $18). Terry’s struggle comes from his abusive and unloving stepmother and father, his experience as a Jehovah’s Witness, and his adolescent awakening to the fact that

By Ben Rivers

h, the memoir. The literary world’s reality TV only better, hopefully. After a long day of work it is nice to recline and unwind by escaping into someone else’s life. Why else would we be obsessed with which celebrity is currently in rehab, or the most recent dysfunctional family to profit by exploiting their children? If your TV viewing habits turn towards neatly self-contained and compelling episodes within a lightly sentimental and comic season, pick up Dan Bucatinsky’s Does This Baby Make Me Look Straight?: Confessions of a Gay Dad (Touchstone, $14.99).

NOVEMBER 2012

he is gay. Having been raised as a conservative Christian myself, I identify with his recounting of what it is like believing that you are going to Hell because of who you are. It is disheartening to be reminded that child abuse is so insidious that it goes unseen by others, or others choose to ignore it, as in the case of Terry’s relatives and fellow churchgoers. Terry’s story is compelling, and it is fascinating to observe as he recounts the moments he began to realize he was “different.” Where Terry’s memoir falls flat is the narrative of his “inner child” which shares the memoir with his adult self. This distracts from his engaging story, causing breaks in flow, and is unneeded. The information can easily be delivered solely by the Adult Terry. These are two good memoirs with two different takes on family, childhood, and the gay experience in America. So if you desire a lighter or more serious escape at the end of your day, these two books will be much better than watching stage moms sadly live through their children. Besides, reading is good for you. l


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LGBTQ community should take notice of National Family Caregivers Month

By Ciara Reid, staff reporter

F

eb. 2, 2004 is a date that Doug Trip will never forget. He arrived to the Wichita home he shares with Allan Foster, his partner of 21 years, and found him standing in the living room, unable to speak. Allan had experienced a massive stroke. He was completely paralyzed on his right side, and lost his ability to speak. The blur of the next few weeks still sticks in Doug’s mind. Hours spent sitting in the waiting room as his partner’s condition worsened. Due to Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act (HIPAA) rules and because Doug and Allan were not legally married, no one at the hospital was obligated to inform him of Allan’s status. Doug also had no rights to sign hospital papers or make decisions on Allan’s behalf. “He had to have a procedure done, so I had to call his family and have his dad sign papers so they could do a procedure,” says Doug. Allan spent five days in the hospital, then the next seven weeks in rehab. Doug, a former law enforcement officer, had just started his own business not too long before Allan’s stroke. “I had to shut everything down,” he says. Allan has not regained any of the abilities he lost in his stroke, and has been completely bedbound since. For the past eight years, Doug has been Allan’s primary caregiver. Making sure he takes all the necessary medication at the right times. Taking him to doctor’s appointments. Making him the most comfortable he can be in the home they share together. Doug says he can tell what Allan’s thinking just by looking him in the eye. For the better part of the last decade, they’ve shared moments together without words. Their bond – before and since Allan’s stroke, is unbreakable. -----In the beginning of Doug’s new role as caregiver, he thought he was in it alone. Like many caregivers, Doug was launched into his new role without warning. The role of a caretaker can be immediate or gradual; whether a partner or family member sustains a sudden injury or is diagnosed with a disease that slowly deteriorates their ability to take care of themselves. For the LGBT community, the struggle as a caregiver and an aging person can sometimes be more difficult. Monica Cissell, director of housing and community services at the Central Plains Area Agency on Aging (CPAAA) in Wichita, says that the LGBTQ aging community sometimes does not have the support that heterosexual couples have. Many LGBTQ

people rely on their friends as caregivers, as they may not have supportive family members. “We want to make our services available to anyone and everyone,” she says. According to the Service & Advocacy for Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual a n d Tr a n s g e n d e r Elders (SAGE), approximately one in five adult Americans are caregivers in s o m e c a p a c i t y. SAGE states that LGBT individuals are particularly likely Doug, left, and Allan on their last vacation to Mexico before the stroke. to be caregivers, because many are single and do not have November as National Family Caregivers children. Their families may see them as the Month. prime candidate most available to care for Some caregivers, Cissell says, work full-time, with kids at home, and are also older family members. A supportive network of friends and caring for a loved one over 50. The average family are vital to a caregiver, especially time spent in the caregiver role is about 20 full-time caregivers like Doug. At first, hours per week. “We consider caregiving a Doug’s friends weren’t sure what to do. pretty general term,” she explains. “From Many of them didn’t come around. Then shoveling a neighbor’s walkway and picking something clicked. “They started coming up groceries, to visiting them, and full 24/7 around, sitting with Allan so I could go care.” grocery shopping, go read somewhere, or Agencies like CPAAA provide a number have a coffee,” he says. “My friends have of invaluable services for both caregivers and seniors. They provide information and been my lifesaver.” resources such as what local programs exist to support them in their home, how to get -------home-delivered meals, information on legal continued on page 37 Many new caregivers are unaware of all the resources available to them. There are 629 aging For more information on the local and national agencies in the United resources available, visit the following websites: States. The CPAAA is just one of 11 area agencies www.nfcacares.org/national_family_caregiver_month/ on aging in the state of www.lgbtagingcenter.org/index.cfm Kansas. www.kdads.ks.gov/kdads/AboutKDADS.html Cissell says that www.k4a.org/ caregivers are an important part of helping Planning and Service Area (PSA) 1 – Wyandotteprofessionals care for Leavenworth AAA - www.wycokck.org/aging seniors. The National PSA 2 – Central Plains AAA www.cpaaa.org Family Caregivers PSA 3 – Northwest KS AAA www.nwkaaa.com Association states that PSA 4 – Jayhawk AAA www.jhawkaaa.org more than 65 million – PSA 5 – Southeast KS AAA www.sekaaa.com 29% of the population PSA 6 – Southwest KS AAA www.swkaaa.org - are caregivers in some PSA 7 – East Central KS AAA www.eckaaa.org capacity in the United PSA 8 – North Central/Flint Hills AAA www.ncfhaaa.com States alone. To help raise PSA 9 – Northeast KS AAA www.nekaaa.org awareness and increase PSA 10 – South Central KS AAA www.sckaaa.org the public’s education PSA 11 – Johnson County AAA hsa.jocogov.org/aging/ on the role of caregiver, aging.shtml the association deemed


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NOVEMBER 2012

Red Ribbon Art Auction celebrates 20 years

LAWRENCE - The Douglas County AIDS Project (DCAP) will hold its 20th annual Red Ribbon Art Auction on Saturday, Nov. 10 at Maceli’s, 1031 New

Kansas City’s premiere cabaret show featuring live singing female impersonators, The Girlies. First formed in 2006, The

The Girlies

Hampshire. Doors open at 6:30pm and the auction begins at 8pm. DCAP, a non-profit agency that provides AIDS services in Douglas, Franklin and Jefferson counties, hopes to raise $15,000 from this year’s auction. The proceeds will directly fund DCAP’s services, including case management and emergency assistance to clients, prevention education programs, and free HIV testing. Lawrence artist Jenifer Jo Webster is this year’s featured artist. She is known for her vibrant watercolors depicting animals, plant life, and other scenes. Also featured this year is

Girlie Show performed at Bar Natasha until it closed in 2008. It was revived several times, most recently this March at Californos in Westport, now billed as The Girlies. The group includes performers Christa Collins, Daisy Buckët, Tajma Stetson and Loretta Martin. Tickets to the Red Ribbon Art Auction are $30 in advance, $35 at the door and are available by calling 785.843.0040 or e-mailing dcaped@sunflower. com. For more information, including images of donated artwork, visit www. douglascoutyaidsproject.org. l


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FMCC Ad 11.12:Layout 1 PAGE 24

10/25/12

12:20 PM Page 1 LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

NOVEMBER 2012

You Spoke... We Listened

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ey Mama, Are you concerned or believe the world is going to end this year? Pondering Listen, if I worry about something I cannot control then I would not enjoy life much. Rather I believe it or not it will end for me the day I die! But don’t get your hopes up I plan to be around a long time to annoy everyone! Mama, Are you sick of all the debates and political ads? Not signed I usually just tune them out or change the channel. I will tell you what I am sick of though. All the damn people saying each one is lying or has an evil plan other than running the county! Just keep your damn mouth shut and vote for who you want. I don’t want to know what your opinion is. Did you hear that Eunice? I recently went on a date. It went well or at least I thought it did. They even said they wanted to go out again and would call me. I get messages from them, mostly small chit chat. They never mention going out again. What do you make of it? Frustrated Either the person has not got enough guts to tell you they do not want to go out again or they are a flake. If that is the way they are then you’re better off.

You want someone that is not afraid of taking chances or going for what they want and being honest. So wake up and smell the coffee - let it go. Why do you all ask me about dating so much, gay or straight? I am an old widowed woman. What makes you think I know the answers? I would like my readers to answer this by either e-mailing Mamatharper@aol.com or Facebook me at Thelma Harper. I want to turn things around and see if you all can help me like I help you!! Do you think it is healthy to hold grudges? P’ed off I think it depends! If they did something bad and to make you not trust them then no; just cut them out of your life. If you’re so consumed by what they did that it is making you miserable then NO again. Good God, let it go. Don’t let their stupidity ruin your life, I am sure it is not even bothering them! If you do not let it go then you will end up like Eunice! Living with me, single, kids in trouble, and making me yell and drink beer! Just forgive in you mind and let it go! I think if Republicans did that we would get more done! Looking forward to your answers to my question! l Have a question for Mama? E-mail MamaTHarper@aol.com or friend Thelma Harper on Facebook.

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NOVEMBER 2012

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

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Bears Got Talent: La Cage raises $1,300 for food pantry

By Steve Einsel WICHITA - “Where my girls at? Make your heels clap, Click clack - click clack uh!” and off we go with the Wichita Bears 2012 version of La Cage aux Bear, “Bears Got Talent.” The annual event puts an extreme “campy drag show” format to raising funds for Metropolitan Community Church’s food pantry Loaves & Fishes. This year the event kicked off with an opening song with the entire “cast of characters” using RuPaul’s version of the song Click, Clack, Go Make Dat Money. Lead by Misty Massengill from Salina, the 17 members of the cast joined in a fun, over-the-top costumed and choreographed opening number for the three hour show Saturday, Oct. 20 at Fantasy. A big hit with the opening number was Tony Rois as Xanado with a costume front, back, sideways and every-other way of teddy bears pinned to a shirt dress. The lyrics continue, “Hey girl, you go gon’ - gon’

- gon’ make dat money” and that is exactly what happened, raising $1,300 for Loaves & Fishes. Mama Harper served as MC for the event and added great narrative to the performances. More than 30 acts were performed during the show with performers coming from Salina, Junction City, Tulsa, Dallas and Omaha. Among the most campy acts were Phyllis (Ken Smith) and her never-ending crazy outfits and sexy-seductive dance moves; Junie Cleaver (Ben Breese) this time kicking it way up as “Sara Palin-look-a-like, Sister Junie” and Amanda Keep (from Tulsa Green Country Bears) performing a rounding rendition of Looking For A City by Vestal Goodwin. The “high drag” performances in addition to Misty Massengill were Dallas Bear Tommy Arbizu (Bearika Fish-Beaverhausen); Junction City Teddy Bear members Lil Kim Chi and Carlotta Junachelli; and Marcus Nelson (Chocolata).

Halfway through the show, Mama and “Eunice” (Pat Connor) performed a skit. Then Kelly Little, co-owner of Fantasy, did a fundraising game in which $90 was raised, and the bar matched the amount with $180. The closing song was Born This Way by Lady Gaga. A trio of the Bears opened the song with a bear troupe entering the stage in “Gaga-type” costumes. Following the finale, t h e j u d g e s a w a r d e d Larry Finch (Shenndza Lick’n) from Dallas Chocolata as the best cause.” talent. “It is such a blessing to LaCage 2013 is already know that the Bears and MCC planned for Oct. 19 with the have such a great working theme “Garage Sale Divas relationship,” Rev. Jackie Carter, Destroy Christmas!” First MCC’s pastor, said. “Each F o r i n f o r m a t i o n a b o u t year, I am amazed at the ability joining the Wichita Bears, visit of the Wichita Bears to raise wichitabears.org or Facebook. money for our food pantry. They com/wichitabears. The group have a unique ability to combine holds monthly meetings on the laughter and work in an event third Sunday of each month at that allows people to have fun 5:30pm at Spangles at Kellogg and give money to support their and Broadway. l


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Trans-Surgery: Part Nine

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n the second day after the surgery, in the afternoon, they removed the padding that was covering me. They handed me a hand mirror and I got to see myself for the first time. I knew that it would not look the same as it will look after about three months, and both the doctor and the nurse had warned me that it would be “ugly” at first, but it was beautiful to me. In just a few short weeks after the surgery, the swelling had gone down a lot and it becomes ever more beautiful each and every day. After that it was time for them to unpack my vagina. When the vagina was formed, it was packed with a long stream of gauze to help it hold its shape in the first few days of recovery. Next, they removed my catheter and told me I could leave after I peed twice. I’m going to tell you that I am not a fan of hospital beds, and this was great news. The nurse had me watch the cleaning process so that I could do it back at the hotel. Then they brought me five bottles of water. I am not going to pretend that I knew exactly how this

peeing thing was going to work. I did not. After about the third bottle of water, my tummy was full, but my bladder was still trying to figure out what was happening. Anyway, I sensed a need to pee within an hour or so, and managed to accomplish the task at hand. Adventures in Peeing was only at the beginning

“I am not going to pretend that I knew exactly how this peeing thing was going to work. I did not. ... Adventures in Peeing was only at the beginning of the story and there would be additional adventures to follow.” of the story and there would be additional adventures to follow. They brought me back to the hotel. The five bottles of water consumed at the clinic were beginning to wake up my bladder. After resting, I woke up feeling like I could pee, but I sat down for a minute in the chair. Within moments it was clear that I should have gone directly to the bathroom, and I had my first experience with not knowing how to predict or control this particular bodily function. Fortunately, the learning curve

Thanksgiving Potluck

7:00 PMThursdayNovember 15 Maceli’s1031 New Hampshire Based in Lawrence, Kansas, our mission is to support, educate and serve the gay, lesbian, bisexual, and trans communities, their families and allies.

on this one was pretty short. It was time for my evening cleaning of the wounds. This is a point in the journey that neither I nor my friend had anticipated. I was trying to remember how I was supposed to do the cleaning and figure out how I was going to do it by myself when she offered to do it for me. I will be forever grateful for my friend and the fact that she was here with me. I cannot begin to express my love for this woman who, like a sister, has given freely of her time, money, and love so that my path would be less difficult. In the course of our conversations regarding this experience she said that she could not imagine how women who come here by themselves are able to do it. I said that I was sure there were times when they

We’ll cook up the turkey, mashed potatoes and gravy, plus provide water and coffee. You bring a side and a beverage/libation of your choice. This is always a very good time. Bring a friend!

undoubtedly shed tears of pain, tiredness, and loneliness. These were tears I did not have to cry, because of the kindness and care she has given to me. If there is one thing of which I am certain in this life, it is that when such a precious thing is given to me, life will offer me the means by which to pay it forward. I would like to share that this was not easy for her, or for me. Neither of us knew that this part of the journey would unfold the way that it did. For me, it meant abandonment of modesty, with this particular type of modesty being one of my most deeply seeded characteristics. For her, it brought back feelings of difficult times, memories and pain. Of all the things I hope for her, and there are many, one of the most significant is that this experience will bring her the same healing that she has gifted to me. At the appointment two weeks after the surgery, the doctor discovered that I had some dead skin inside my vagina. It was nothing to worry about, but the skin needed to be removed. He wanted to try to do it that day with me awake, but

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if he was not able to do that, it would require being put to sleep for the procedure the next day. They led me to a room with a bed with stirrups. As in all of my female medical firsts, both excitement and apprehension flooded my mind. Excitement gave way to significant discomfort the moment they strapped my legs into place. Discomfort gave way to previously unimagined discomfort when the doctor created the space through which to perform the procedure. I kept thinking to myself that I needed to relax because my “analyze everything” brain had determined that if I was able to do so, there would be no need to return the next day. For some reason, the Eve Ensler piece from The Vagina Monologues entitled My Angry Vagina kept going through my mind. The only thing left to say about this experience is, “Oh, my God.” Thankfully, the doctor was able to do what he needed to do. I had my final check up on Thursday morning. We flew out early Friday morning, and got back to Kansas about 33 hours later. It was with both gladness and sadness that I left this amazing place. There is such reverence there. I am constantly struck by the kindness and the diversity of the people who live there. I will be going back to work in about three weeks. I am changed. I will never again be a person who has not traveled beyond American borders. I have met the people of a world about which I previously knew nothing. And I have been humbled by their spirit of service to humankind. I popped into the Shawnee County Commission office this morning, knowing that there was a meeting that offered me the chance to say hi to the many people there who have been so supportive of my journey. I walked down the hallway in the courthouse and saw the other women there. I smiled, ever so slightly, knowing for the first time - I too, have a vagina. l Stephanie Mott is a transsexual woman from Topeka. She is the executive director of the Kansas Statewide Transgender Education Project and state chair of the Kansas Equality Coalition. She can be reached at stephanieequality@ yahoo.com.


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GR: I’m very fortunate to have so many great friends and supporters of what I do and I can’t wait to start doing more in our community. Thank you all for your love and encouragement.

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ello once again Kansas! It is time once again for another issue of Audrey Asks. This month I decided to interview a very special entertainer who just got back from competing for the title of Miss Gay America in Columbus, Ohio! She is seductive, sexy, and one of my favorite entertainers, The Chocolate Goddess: Godiva Romance! Audrey McQueen: Hey Godiva thank you for doing this interview with me this month. Godiva Romance: You’re very welcome, honey. I’m excited! AM: My first question for you is how did you come up with your drag name? GR: I got my name after getting a gift box of Godiva chocolates. They were so good I decided that’s what my alter ego should be called. AM: I love it. How long have you been doing drag? GR: I’ve been doing drag for three years now. AM: How was your overall exp erience at Mis s Gay America? GR: Nationals was the most amazing experience I’ve had in a while. I got the opportunity to see what hard work and dedication can do for you. The people

I’ve met there are simply amazing performers and passionate about their art. It was kind of a refresher for me. My drag needed that. AM: Who would you say are your inspirations or role models in drag? GR: My inspirations are Erotica Romance (my drag mom), all the lovely divas I’ve come to call family at the Fantasy Complex, of course RuPaul, as well as Beyonce, the supreme diva extraordinaire. AM: Do you have anything exciting happening in the future or something we can look forward to seeing you do? GR: Well, I’m preparing for Miss Kansas USofA and Miss Kansas America next year. You may even catch a video audition for RuPaul’s Drag Race; just keep your eyes open! AM: Where can we catch one of your shows? GR: You can catch me every Sunday night with Ivory James and the Stars of Illusion and sometimes at The Brown Sugar Show on Thursdays, both at the Fantasy Complex. AM: Do you have any advice you can give our readers or anyone wanting to do what you do?

Godiva Romance GR: All I can say to the readers is stay true to yourself. We spend too much time trying to find out who we are and things in life to be passionate about. Once you’ve made these discoveries you’ve found your purpose and no one can take them from you! AM: Godiva thank you so much for doing this interview would you like to say one last thing before we wrap this up?

Well everyone that wraps up this month’s edition of Audrey Asks. I would like to send a special thank you to Godiva for doing this interview with me, and I wish nothing but the best of luck to her in all of her future plans! Thank you all for reading! I have a very exciting interview in the works for next month so stay tuned, and stay fabulous! l


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News Briefs Faggot used in 2.4 million tweets Since July 5, “faggot” and variations of this word have been tweeted over 2.4 million times on Twitter. This number was announced Sept, 26 with the unveiling of a new website called nohomophobes.com by the University of Alberta’s Institute for Sexual Minority Studies and Services. The website, designed to serve as a “social mirror,” captures the homophobic language that exists in Twittersphere and counts tweets that use the terms: “Faggot” (2.4 million), “So Gay” (800,000 tweets), “No Homo” (800,000 tweets) and “Dyke” (300,000 tweets). From the Right continued from page 6

the right to marry, that’s given to you by your faith, not the government. Actually, Democrats passed the Defense of Marriage Act as well as Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell, but now that it’s convenient— maybe even necessary—

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

“We never imagined the scale of casual homophobia that actually exists on social media,” says Dr. Kristopher Wells, the Institute’s Associate Director. “The us e of homophobic language remains one of the few socially acceptable forms of discrimination in our society and make no mistake, leads to isolation, bullying, beatings, and tragically youth suicide.”

Cameroon: Justice Delayed for JeanClaude Roger Mbede On Sept. 17, a Cameroonian high court sitting in Yaoundé adjourned the appeal hearing brought by lawyers on behalf of Jean-Claude Roger Mbede, who was sentenced to three years in jail for texting another man, “I am very much in love Democrats are embracing their reputation as the Gay Liberation Party. Being gay shouldn’t equal an automatic Democratic vote. I’m a Republican and a conservative Christian . . . oh, and I’m gay. Being gay doesn’t affect how I vote nor do business. Radical as

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with you.” The delay was issued because there were documents missing from the case file. A new date has been set for Nov. 19. Mbede was sent to prison on Mar. 9, 2011 after he was convicted under Section 347a of the Cameroonian Penal Code. In addition to jail time, Mbede was fined 33,000 Francs CFA (about $61 USD). Mbede spent 16 months in prison before being released on July 16, 2012 for health reasons. He currently remains free, awaiting the verdict in the appeal. Section 347a of the Cameroon Penal Code, which became law in 1972, punishes “sexual relations Mbede with a person of the same sex” with a prison term of six it seems, I look at the facts and the issues when making those decisions. Shouldn’t everyone? The problem is that politics, if not the country, has become too “us and them.” The “Gays” are in this corner, the “Blacks” over there, oh, and up there? That’s the faction calling themselves the “White Girls of America.” Who could ever understand what it is like to be in a group that takes a back seat to every other group in the country? Well, at least they think they do and that’s why they’re taking a stand for their “rights;” whatever those may be. Amazingly, just yesterday I paid the same $5/gallon for gas that the straight guy ahead of me paid. Who knew? I guess it’s possible that the gas pump didn’t perceive my gayness, and therefore gave me the “straight” price. Or is it just that it’s all complete jackassery and there is no “us” and “them”? We—gay, straight, black, white, green—are all in the same boat, trying to figure out how to house our families and put food on the table while every hardearned penny gets sucked into the gas tank and more people get laid off or another small business folds under the burden of higher taxes. We need to focus on the problems that affect all of us— gas prices, a truly fair tax system, and reducing government spending—not the issues we’ve created and decided to get

offended over. Sure, there will be wailing and gnashing of teeth when some programs get cut, but with the level of unmanaged spending going on, we can’t afford to worry about being P.C. and not hurting people’s feelings over what they think their rights should be because they are gay, black or back-seat white girls. Being gay or straight or anything else doesn’t include or exempt us from the disastrous economic conditions we’re facing. We’re all in it together. “U.S.” isn’t the first word in “US and them”—it stands for United States. We the people--gay and straight alike-can’t last another four years. l Dan Henderson is known to most of us as Dan “The Yes Man” Henderson of Super Car Guys, but is a widely successful businessman who uses his time and resources giving back to the gay community. From the Left continued from page 6

responsible for boosting the economy, but that government should stay out of business. Can they have their cake and eat it too? I think not. Let’s remember the numerous amounts of pro-business, pro-tax cut bills that have been blocked by Congress along party lines. Congress also blocked a number of bills including the American Jobs Act, Small Business Job Act, Unemployment Extension Bill and Veterans Job Bill, that’s main goal was to put our veterans back to work. So where are the answers?


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LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

dramatic and spectacular styling layered with passages that speak to the heart of any (wo)man on the journey to find her true inner beauty. Butch will be available Nov. 1 on Amazon.com and in local bookstores.

Lambda Legal launches mobile resource for LGBTQ youth

months to five years and a fine ranging from 20,000 to 200,000 Francs CFA.

Butch: Never judge a butch by her cover Well, these aren’t your typical flannel, mullet, boot-wearing butches. This new art book pushes the “butch” definition beyond its seams. Packed with fashion forward pictures that are vivid, dramatic and provocative, these gender-bending bois will make your heart skip a beat. Award-winning lesbian filmmaker Kanithea Powell’s lavishly illustrated tribute to butch women showcases The right wants to criticize our President for not putting anything forward, but the tactic seems to be that Congress is unwilling to put anything forward to help get people back to work. I believe they were serious when Republicans promised that they wanted to make Obama a oneterm President. The problem is that they aren’t trying to get our country back on track, but to derail it and make Obama the lonely scapegoat. During his presidency, and before being elected, our President stated his ideas about marriage equality were evolving. However the administration has ended Don’t Ask Don’t Tell, stood boldly in support of gay marriage, eased hurdles on federal employees trying to obtain benefits. It is historic that this administration has made a commitment that gays are part of our society and should be treated

The “Know Your Rights - Youth” resource hub is a comprehensive tool for LGBTQ youth and includes legal and advocacy guidance on an array of issues: bullying, student speech and expression, proms, dances and dating, issues facing transgender youth, gay-straight alliances, creating a safer school, LGBTQ allies, and youth in outof-home care settings. “Based on the calls to our Legal Help Desk, we know that LGBTQ youth in crisis--whether they are bullied in school or rejected by their families or homeless--need to be able to access information about their rights and the laws to protect them, as quickly as possible,” said Leslie Gabel-Brett, Director of Education and Public Affairs. Visit: www.lambdalegal.org/ know-your-rights. l equal under the law. As politics become more polarized and people begin to clench tightly to their beliefs in times of struggle we see the new great divide in political identity. I like to think I am an informed voter. As a racial minority and a gay man, my identity and my best interests intrinsically intertwine. I believe social issues are just as important as economic issues. Issues regarding women’s health, equal pay, healthcare, and ending discriminatory practices also have a direct effect on our economy and our society. That is why I am voting for Obama/ Biden on Nov. 4. l Danny Cooper is a graduate in Theatre and is currently finishing his 2nd and 3rd degree in Political Science and International Studies. He has traveled and worked throughout Latin America, South Korea and most recently the Middle East. Follow on twitter @ brasildan.

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Local gay composer behind music and lyrics of The Forum’s A Christmas Carol

By Angie Combs

criticism of capitalism and shrouded it with ghouls and WICHITA - Christmas always scary noises in the night,” seems to be the season of Jackson said. “Underneath all music, movies, and theatre of this is a basic message that productions; each offering a each of us deserves food, shelter, story that tries to embody the security and a chance to offer spirit of the season. Traditional something back to the world. A productions and annual shows Christmas Carol is all the more have become mainstays for important for the times we are families and communities. The currently living in.” Forum Theatre is working hard The writings focus on specific to create a new tradition out themes of family, redemption, of an old one - by presenting, hope, charity and the renewal Charles Dickens’ A Christmas that people can create by forgiving one another and holding on tight to loved ones. “We wanted to explore the idea of family and inclusion within a f a m i l y . Scrooge has a family and he ignores them r e p e a t e d l y, Karla Burns, Paul Jackson and Aidan Martin in the 2011 yet in the end, production of A Christmas Carol. he is warmly welcomed back into the fold. This is lovely Carol. In the summer of 2011, stuff,” Jackson said. playwright Conrad Jestmore, There is also a new twist director Kathy Page-Hauptman, this year. “I am actually in and composer Paul Jackson the middle of writing a new came together to create a song for Marley in one of the musical version of this English opening scenes,” Jackson said. classic while trying to “preserve “I can’t say much yet, but it the language and feel of the looks like we have secured a Dickens material,” says Jackson. rather famous Broadway veteran “This turned out to be a great to play Marley and I am having a challenge for me lyrically as blast writing a new song for his it is difficult to write modern- voice.” feeling melodies and retain the Jackson and Wichita’s own vernacular of Victorian London, Broadway sensation, Karla Burns, will reprise their roles but I think we did a nice job.” The show was first produced as Scrooge and the Ghost of in December 2011 at the then Christmas Present, respectively. newly opened Forum Theatre, The 90-minute show will located in the old Hillside be performed on Thursdays, Christian Church building at Fridays, and Saturdays at 8pm, 147 S. Hillside. A Christmas and Sundays at 2pm from Carol, A Spirited New Musical, Nov. 29-Dec. 23. For more was written for the space at information and to purchase the Forum and theater owners tickets, call the Forum Theatre Grant and Janet Rine, along at (316) 618-0444. with Jackson, hold hope of Check out the show with it becoming a new Wichita family this holiday season, and in the words of Tiny Tim, “God tradition. “Dickens wrote a scathing bless us, everyone.” l


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NOVEMBER 2012

World AIDS Day events across the state

T

he first cases of what would later become known as AIDS were reported in the United States in June 1981. Since then, 1.7 million people in the U.S. are estimated to have been infected with HIV, including over 619,000 who have already died and approximately 1.2 million (1,178,350) adults and adolescents who were living with HIV at the end of 2008, the most recent year for which national prevalence estimates are available. The impact of the HIV/AIDS epidemic spans the nation with

HIV diagnoses having been reported in all 50 states, the District of Columbia, and the U.S. dependencies, possessions, and associated nations (AIDS. gov). World AIDS Day, held on Dec. 1 each year, is an opportunity for people worldwide to unite in the fight against HIV, show their support for people living with HIV, and to commemorate people who have died. World AIDS Day was the first ever global health day beginning in 1988.

Sunday Worship, 10 AM UPCOMING EVENTS “Feed My Sheep” - Free Community Meal Saturday, November 10, 5-6:30pm “Native American Wisdom & Spirituality” Adult Education Course Sunday, November 11, 11:30am World AIDS Day Worship Saturday, December 1 4425 SW 19th Street, Topeka, KS 66604 Phone: 785.272.1442 office@mcctopeka.org www.mcctopeka.org

Manhattan Starting on Friday, Nov. 30, the eve of World AIDS Day, Kansas State University will be offering free HIV/AIDS testing in the student union along with condoms and informational materials regarding HIV/AIDS and other STIs. Come show your support and get tested! On Saturday, Dec. 1 at 7pm the LGBT Resource Center and the student group at K-State, LGBT and Allies, will be hosting their annual “Red Ribbon Ball”

- a fundraising event complete with food, drinks, and music - where all proceeds will be donated to AIDS awareness. The event will be held at the Ecumenical Campus Ministry building, 1021 Denison Ave. All are welcome. For more information regarding this event, visit the LGBT Resource Center webpage at www.k-state.edu/ lgbt or e-mail lgbt@k-state.edu. continued on page 36


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REVIEW Arbitrage Rated R for language, violent images and drug use tttt- Even though Richard Gere almost rivals Kevin Costner on the list of my least favorite actors, I’ve got to hand it to him here. With writer/director Nicholas Jarecki, Gere makes this story buzz. Gere plays Robert Miller, a venture capitalist trying to dig himself out of some serious fraud. He’s among the “one percent” and determined to stay that way, no matter what. The “matter” is what makes for an interesting and suspenseful story. Reminiscent of the Martin Landau character in Woody Allen’s Crimes and Misdemeanors, Miller has a serious mistress problem for which he doesn’t have time. It’s bad enough that his daughter Brooke (Brit Marling) works in his firm and his wife Ellen (Susan Sarandon) demands that much of his time and money be delivered to her favorite charities. When Robert’s mistress, art gallery owner Julie Cote (Laetitia Casta) seriously invokes his guilt at missing a gallery opening, he rushes off to see her against his better judgment. At this point we may think he has a conscience. But alas, things go terribly wrong, causing Miller to face more compelling challenges to the maintenance of his wealth and his life. Enter Jimmy Grant (Nate Parker), the son of Miller’s former black chauffer, whom Miller calls to help him escape the law.

Richard Gere stars as Robert Miller in Roadside Attractions’ Arbitrage (2012)

We move with Miller as he struggles to close a deal that will restore his financial stability and keep his family from causing or receiving harm. He wrestles with his need for Grant’s help and his guilt at putting Grant’s life in jeopardy. Grant is grateful for Miller’s prior but unexplained help with Grant’s now-deceased father. So Jimmy goes along but with eyes wide open. The juxtaposition of Miller ’s and Grant’s moral integrity is well done, without sentimentality or the usual phony righteousness of so many American films. “It is what it is,” as they say. The issue of race isn’t addressed broadly but as subtext, as racism gets played out in how Grant is used by both Miller and the “justice system.” CISmagnet.eps 1 10/18/2011 2:23:51 PM There is a scene between Miller and

tttt- You should see it - I’d see it again! ttt- Entertaining but flawed tt- It didn’t kill me; see it at a $1 theatre t- Skip it - it’s not worth the popcorn

his daughter in Central Park in which they discuss what he’s done. As one listens to the dialogue, perfectly nuanced by Gere and Marling, one gleans true meaning at a moment when there was great danger of communicating something trite. These moments are what movie-goers like myself long for. Jarecki has a great future ahead of him. Sarandon is the picture of a wife who has put up with a lot in exchange for a lot. Marling and Casta and Parker are all well cast. Even the elements that seem derivative, like the detective (Tim Roth) who ever so slightly reminds us of Columbo, are so deftly drawn that they are amusing without being annoying. It’s hard to believe that this is 30-something Jarecki’s directorial debut. Everything fits, everything works and we don’t know how it’s going to end. Miller is a bastard but will he get his? When the film does end we know that the conclusion was inevitable, but only in retrospect. There’s an irony that movies about big business and greed are creeping into the canon at the same time as the American people (or about half of them) seem to be rooting for the one percent. Margin Call is another of this genre. I suppose it began with Wall Street but now the stakes are higher, the action more lethal, and the people more mean- spirited. What makes this particular movie brilliant, though, is that one can view it at many levels. It works as a moral cautionary tale, a commentary on American life and values, a psychological drama, and simply as a well-crafted suspenseful thriller. How cool is that? l


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LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

Estate planning for same-sex couples

ealth management, retirement and legacy planning are challenges for everyone, but there are particular issues to consider in passing assets along to surviving partners, particularly for samesex couples. Your wishes most likely won’t happen unless you have legal documents in place that clearly direct that your partner will inherit some or all of your assets. Ordinarily, husbands and

documents in place to make sure the other partner inherits the intended assets. Take a close look at how your beneficiaries are named on important assets such as retirement plans. Many assets transfer to the beneficiaries named in the documents concerning those assets regardless of what your will says. Most people name beneficiaries when they establish a retirement account. Changes in household and family

wives may pass any amount of assets to the surviving spouse without being subject to federal taxes1. That doesn’t apply to unmarried or samesex couples under current laws. However, there are effective ways to achieve that outcome. More sophisticated planning is required if your estate – including life insurance benefits – exceeds $2 million. That is why estate planning is essential for same-sex couples with significant assets to preserve and direct. It is important to think about whether, when one partner dies, there are essential legal

circumstances may call for you to review this information. When unmarried parents, including same-sex couples, adopt a child, it may be possible for both to file as head of household and pay less in taxes – unlike married couples. Establishing trusts for your children can help you provide them with financial security in case anything should happen to you or your partner. Trusts can be an effective way to avoid probate, to pass your assets on as you intend, and to keep matters private. Your financial advisor can work with you, your accountant, and

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your attorney to guide you through the estate Financial Advisors at Wells planning process and to Fargo were the first in the ensure your values and financial services industry your view of the future to receive the Accredited are reflected in the legal documents your attorney Domestic Partnership puts in place on your sm Advisor designation. behalf. Both you and your partner should have up-to-date perfect 100% grade for fairliving wills to express your minded corporate policies and wishes for end-of-life care as the equal treatment shown to all well as last wills and testaments. LGBT employees. DiversityInc magazine has named Wells Fargo & Company second on its list of “Top 10 Companies for LGBT Employees.” For more information about financial issues a ff e c t i n g s i n g l e - s e x couples, call for the free brochure Tailored Investment Planning Solutions for Domestic Partners by contacting W. Brian Martz at Wells Fargo Advisors at 316Unmarried couples also must 267-0300. l consider having in place hospital visitation authorizations and 1Wells Fargo Advisors does not render healthcare proxies that allow legal, accounting, or tax advice. Be sure consult with your own tax and legal your partner to make sensitive to advisors before taking any action that decisions on your behalf. You may have tax consequences. should have durable powers o f a t t o r n e y f o r f i n a n c e s This article was written by Wells Fargo and provided courtesy of W. and a domestic partnership Advisors Brian Martz, CFP ® CIMA ® ADPA agreement that spells out the First Vice President-Investments in contributions each of you make Wichita, KS at 316-383-8490. to the relationship. Ask your in securities and insurance attorney how to document your Investments products are: NOT FDIC-INSURED/ relationship most effectively. NOT BANK-GUARANTEED/MAY LOSE Find a financial advisor VALUE you can trust to help shepherd Fargo Advisors, LLC, Member you through the process. The Wells SIPC, is a registered broker-dealer and Human Rights Campaign has a separate non-bank affiliate of Wells given Wells Fargo Advisors a Fargo & Company.


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NOVEMBER 2012

RECOMMENDED FOR MATURE AUDIENCES

NOV. 27-29 • CENTURY II CONCERT HALL 316.219.4849 • wichitatix.com •

.com

Tickets at the Wichita Tix Box Office. Groups: 1.866.314.7687 BroadwayKS

WichitaTheaterLeague


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is available only to persons living with HIV/AIDS. To donate items, contact Kevin at rlrhouseman@ webtv.net or Marko at the club. Auction starts at 10pm. Saturday, Dec. 1 is the Red Ribbon Review. This is an open cast variety show. All performers are welcome: drag, singers, dancers, standup comics, etc. All tips will go to the HIV/AIDS Client Emergency Fund administered by the Junction City Teddy Bears. Performers should be at the club, dressed and in make-up by 9pm. Show starts at 10:30pm. For information about the emergency fund, contact Kevin or your case manager.

WAD continued from page 30

Junction City The Xcalibur Club in Junction City will once again be observing World AIDS Day with the 7th Annual Red Ribbon Weekend. Friday, Nov. 30 will be a bake sale with homemade food items as well as artwork, antiques, basically anything of value donated by the community to be auctioned off. Proceeds go to Duane’s Food Pantry at Riley County Health Department in Manhattan. This facility

bridges Died: Craig Lee Sullivan, 58, unexpectedly on September 18, 2012. A service was held at Pine Valley Christian Church. He is survived by many friends. If you or someone you know is having an anniversary, received a promotion or award, or a loved one has passed away, we will publish it free in Bridges. E-mail editor@libertypress.net.

Wichita World AIDS Day will be commemorated at First Metropolitan Community Church (FMCC) this year. The community is asked to meet Saturday, Dec. 1 at 10:30am in the American Red Cross Parking lot, 1900 E. Douglas. From there participants will walk to FMCC for a program at 11am. Following the program will be a meal featuring a chili cook-off, community booths, and music. According to Teresa Romey of the World AIDS Day planning committee, Quilt pieces will be accepted if anyone wants to make and present one during the program. “We decided to do a daytime event this year due to the cold, dark and to make it easier for those with disabilities to come,”

Romey explained.

Topeka Positive Connections and Metropolitan Community Church of Topeka will present a candlelight memorial to honor those lost to AIDS, and an interfaith service including speakers, readings, and music by local clergy and community leaders. The


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event is hosted by MCC of Topeka, 4425 SW 19th St., Dec. 1 at 6pm. Refreshments will follow. Donations for the Positive Connections Food Pantry will also be accepted at the service and free HIV rapid testing will be available before and after the service. l

We’re expanding! Want to be a distribution point? e-mail editor@ libertypress.net

LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL. Caregivers continued from page 21 experiencing.

services, and loaned medical equipment. For active seniors, the agencies offer volunteer opportunities and health and wellness information, among other resources. “A lot of times people don’t even know what’s out there,” Cissell says. “We want them to realize we are here before that crisis moment.” For the caregiver, agencies like the CPAAA can be a lifesaver. They provide respite for caregivers who need to get away for a short time, caregiver counseling and support groups to help them learn to cope with the struggles – financial and emotional – they may be

Cast your ballots for an exciting November as a jumble of planets march through Scorpio, Sagittarius and Capricorn. Will your words move the masses or trip you up? Are your dreams destined to become reality or just a mirage? Anything is possible so prepare for your victories and stuff the ballot box! ARIES (MAR. 21 - APRIL 20) Proud Rams are elected to change the world this November. So get your stump speech ready, resolve to change some hearts and minds and go forth. Try to gain a little personal insight along the way as you set off to scratch a travel itch and explore exotic, interesting locales. The light of selfknowledge can illuminate even the darkest corners. Well sometimes . . . TAURUS (APRIL 21 - MAY 21) Queer Bulls find themselves yearning for the perfect relationship. So take a hard look at where you are and improve or reassess your current situation. If you haven’t quite found nirvana yet, maybe the problem is with you. How do you approach relationships? Do you need more excitement in a humdrum domestic situation? Juice things up, you squeezable thing. GEMINI (MAY 22 - JUNE 21) Go with the job flow, pink Twin; this is no time to slack off and hope others will fill in the gap. Exercise is also part of the picture this month. Get that bod in shape for the holidays. Your efforts can bring about excellent results. As your self-image improves, start to concentrate more on partnerships. Try a little mood music and the old red light bulb. OK, make it pink. CANCER (JUNE 22 - JULY 23) November begins with a bang and a good time, but as the month progresses you must turn your attention to the job. But be creative and make the most of this early oomph. Simple creative pastimes have potential monumental impact. Who knows, the simple doodle you scribble today could lead to a great masterpiece . . . or at least something worthy of hanging over the couch.

Doug receives assistance from several agencies three times a week. Once Allan turned 60, he qualified to have a CNA who comes in for two hours a week. Wednesday is Allan’s bath day, so someone comes to assist with bathing. He also gets assistance for three hours every Friday. Though these visits may seem minimal to some people, every minute helps lessen the stress. “Allan is my partner. Allan is half my life,” Doug says. Throughout the last 30 years, they have stood by each other throughout all their struggles and joys. Throughout the last eight years, Doug has had people say to him that they couldn’t imagine being in his situation. That they couldn’t do what he has done for Allan. That they would walk away. “If you love someone and care for them, no matter what, you stick by them,” Doug says. “I don’t need a piece of paper that says in sickness and in health. We have that commitment to each other.” l

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LEO (JULY 24 - AUG. 23) SAGITTARIUS (NOV. 23 - DEC. 22) Proud Lions must deal with family If your intuition is working overtime, go issues now. So what if the chickens with your inner voice and see how far it come home to roost? Haul out the takes you. You may be happily surprised frying pan and serve fried chicken! at where it all leads. Gay Archers are much Don’t avoid discussions with a certain more effective than usual in any charitable relative. Why should you? Ultimately, you need to do enterprise so be sure to give your all for any worthy what you have to do - with or without them. It may charitable cause. Become a well-endowed benefactor and just be that as you celebrate your successes, they might see who tries to tap into your bank. bring the champagne. CAPRICORN (DEC. 23 - JAN. 20) VIRGO (AUG. 24 - SEPT. 23) Pink Caps are belles of the ball in The lines of communication are November. Surround yourself with humming. Queer Virgos should shout it compadres and you’ll be guaranteed to from the tops of the mountains and watch have a full dance card for the holidays. the big reaction. Your words have impact Schmooze and socialize while you have and you also have the innate diplomacy the urge. Too too soon you will be awash in all sorts of to pull off any project you set your sights to tackle. spiritual heady stuff. You’ll be on a mission and pink Caps Later this month, you’ll be content to schlep around are hell on wheels when it comes to personal goals. Or the house in your all-togethers. So start to get it all they should be! together. AQUARIUS (JAN. 21 - FEB. 19) LIBRA (SEPT. 24 - OCT. 23) Aqueerians are ready to polish the All that glitters is not gold, or so nameplates on their offices and why not? you realize this November. It is time You’ve worked hard to get where you to review your value system to see are and now you should be able to enjoy the benefits. if it is sync with where you are going in life. Yes, Before you know it, friends are in on the action and want money is important, but money alone cannot buy you to celebrate with you. Call the tune and watch the group true happiness (cheap thrills perhaps, but not true dynamic dance along. What’s on your top ten playlist? happiness.). It is a sad proud Libra who only has cold Uh klezmer?? cash to cling to in the lonely winter nights. Heat it up. PISCES (FEB. 20 - MAR. 20) SCORPIO (OCT. 24 - NOV. 22) Guppies undergo a change of philosophy this There is tremendous energy swirling November which can cause you to reassess around you this November. You are the underpinnings of your life. Scan the catapulted into center stage and are the playing field and be very observant of the unavoidable life of the party. Begin new details. Later you’ll put all this mental energy to good use projects immediately and get Out there in your career. Don’t be shy. Get in your tank and plow and meet new, fabulous folks. Gay Scorps also need through the professional battle lines. Plant your flag in the a complete makeover. Yes - it is possible to improve ground . . . not in your foot. on perfection. Hint - throw out those Giana shirts.

(c) 2012 THE STARRY EYE, LLC., All Rights Reserved. For Entertainment Purposes Only. Can’t get enough? Join the blog: www.thestarryeye.typepad.com/newage Lichtenstein’s astrology book HerScopes is an international sensation. Buy it and feel the vibration. Order now at tinyurl.com/Herscopes


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NOVEMBER 2012

Café & Lounge

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LIBERTY PRESS - WE WERE GAY BEFORE IT WAS COOL.

NOVEMBER 2012

Liberty Press November 2012  
Liberty Press November 2012  

Liberty Press has been covering LGBT Kansas since 1994.

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