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Jan 2012 Issue 5

UBS Activities Costcutted


Brunel’s new VC announced


Jimmy Choo for men?

10 10.00am



ARTS & REVIEWS Why is brainy the new sexy?



Tom Scott Brunel students were left confused at the discovery that the University had built a brand new Costcutters outlet in the middle of the Hamilton Centre during the Christmas period. The discovery of the new outlet came as a surprise to numerous students who were left baffled at the reasons why the new Costcutters had been built in the first place. The University decided to build the new Costcutters to deal with the pressing issue of a lack of retail outlet space on campus and providing more students with shopping facilities. However, with the construction of the Costcutters in the atrium space, it seems as though this is now the end of numerous activities that the Union of Brunel Students has run over the last few months, as there is no longer any space to accommodate them. After discovering the plans, the minutes of the December Cabinet meeting shows that the Union of Brunel Students actively opposes the construction of the new Costcutters

due to the damaging affect it will have on Union activities. One of the main departments affected is UBS Nightlife, as the space is frequently used by Academy and Loco’s. The space is used as an attraction space for Academy, which often inflates a large bouncy castle or a rodeo bull for students to enjoy during the evenings. This will now have to be scrapped. This entertainment, when placed inside the club, reduces the capacity by nearly 150 people, which is a major loss to students who want to attend Academy events. This will also affect students entering the Academy in the coming months, as the box office will be moved to the front door and the queue will need to go outside the building, meaning a very cold start to the night. Another department affected is the Advice and Representation Centre, who now have to look at cancelling or rescheduling their




annual Housing Fayre, which helps students find accommodation for their studies next year. Several other areas of the Union of Brunel Students are set to be affected by the new outlet store. The space is frequently used to promote campaigns that the Union holds and the increased commotion that the outlet will bring is set to disrupt the work done by staff members, whose offices are located nearby, including the Union’s main reception. The University is also set to be affected by the new outlet with regards to their Open Days, which are frequently held in the atrium, having to find a new location. Despite the new Costcutters coming as a surprise to many students, it transpires that talks for the outlet have been ongoing for at least five months without any acknowledgement of the rest of the student body. When news came through that the new outlet was going ahead, a panel

of student union officers, chairs and student assembly members met with the University to request a new location for the outlet in late December. However, plans were too fargone for the University to move the outlet elsewhere. Some students are also curious as to why the outlet is yet another Costcutters especially since the UBS was mandated at Student Assembly to lobby for a Co-Op should another outlet be built. The new Costcutters is set to help reduce the amount of congestion and demand for supplies in the current Costcutters and will act as a ‘Grab and Go’ facility, making it easier for students to grab a bite to eat before their lecture. Yet it appears as though the dramatic negative affect that the outlet with have on students in the long term certainly overshadows this new facility.



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This Month... 03

Amy Blackford - Editor WOW! 2012 is here already. I must admit I have been dreading it. Not only is it full of coursework and dissertation deadlines, it is also my 20+1, eek! That, combined with facing the ‘real world’, is enough to scare anyone. However, on a more positive note, we have the Olympics and TOUR, to Croatia, to look forward to! What a year 2011 was. My New Year’s resolution, as you can see to the right, is to be less ill. Unfortunately nine days in and the cursed cold has hit once again, damn! This Christmas was a particularly quiet one for me and the family, well as quiet as you can get with an excited nine-year-old brother on Christmas morning. I awoke around half seven to the voice shouting at me: “Amy, you have five minutes before we start opening our presents!” It transpires that my mum had been awake, excitedly, since 4am waiting for the rest of us to wake up, what a big kid! Nonetheless it was a great day. I am really lucky in the sense that we still have a relatively ‘young’ family, so it is that much more exciting. My dog even joined in with the day’s festivities by sporting a very fashionable ‘Santa Paws’ costume later on in the day. We are still on the lookout for more contributors, as ever. Do you have something to rant about? Want the Brunel campus to know about events put on by your club or society? Then feel free to email me, or the relevant section editor. We will start to look at the team for next year soon, so get involved and really stand out if you are thinking of applying for an exec position, over the coming months.



Things still happening

ARTS & REVIEWS Arts and reviews galore










Things still happening at Radio Brunel

TVs hate Moxey

The Maze of Awesome strikes again

There’s a TOUR. Did you hear? A TOUR!!!!

News Editor Bess ‘Get Three Chickens’ Browning Sub Editor Adam ‘Be More Sarcastic’ Martley

Submissions Simply put, if you’re a current Brunel student, you can write for Le Nurb. There’s a few things to bear in mind: YOUR ARTICLE

- Your article should be saved as a Word document (.doc or .docx). - Its filename should contain your name, student number, and a suggested headline. - We don’t accept PDF, Works (.wps), OpenOffice (.odt), Pages (.pages) or other formats. - Publisher files (.pub) are particularly horrific, beastly things. Please don’t send any, ever, or Rob will cry. - It may sound obvious, but please run a spellcheck before you submit your article! YOUR IMAGES

- For a Union News or Features article, don’t forget your headshot for use in the byline. - If you like, you can suggest specific images for your article. They’ll need to be separate .jpg or .png files. - Don’t embed your images into the article document - this compresses them too much for use on the page. - Any image filenames and image credits (who the photographer is) should be listed at the end of your article. - Images you submit must not be copyrighted by another individual or organisation. - Please don’t just nick pictures off Google Image Search; we can’t use them 99% of the time! Enquiries, advertising & complaints Design queries and feedback News articles In-depth articles on a given topic Reviews and arts articles Everything sport-related

Editor Amy ‘Be Less Ill’ Blackford Deputy Editor Ben ‘Find New Way to Use Loo’ Moxey Chief Designer Rob ‘Reproduce’ Hunt Chief Sub-Editor Katrina ‘Nothing’ Muhly Media Chair Tom ‘Don’t Shout at Josh’ Scott NEWS

Things still happening for RAG


This month’s team question: what’s your New Year’s resolution for 2012? EDITORIAL


Amy - Rob - via (‘Design Feedback’ in the subject line) Bess - Emma - Nick - Ollie & Alex -


The closing date for articles for the next issue is Tuesday, February 7.

FEATURES Features Editor Emma ‘Conquer Cheese Fear’ Butcher Sub Editor Sharna Lee ‘Learn the Guitar’ Heir Staff Writers Hayley ‘Keep Calm’ Baldwin Devina Sanghani Alec Beeson Rhys Morgan-Jones Charlotte Bale ARTS & REVIEWS Arts & Reviews Editor Nick ‘Spend Less’ Birss Sub Editor Jon ‘Drink More’ Partridge Staff Writers Emma ‘Put Myself First’ I’Anson Subat Bashir Chrissie ‘Daily Good Deed’ Gomez Ricky Compton Lewis ‘Enjoy Every Moment’ Sluman Matt ‘Be More Creative’ Smith Daisy Adamson SPORT

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Sport Editors Ollie ‘Consume Less’ de Kretser Alex ‘Enjoy Life’ Mitchell Sub Editor Paul ‘Work Harder’ Round DESIGN



We’ve moved on Facebook, and are now sharing a page with Radio Brunel. Search ‘UBS Student Media’ for all the latest updates. We’re also on Twitter: @ubsstudentmedia.

Issue 6 out February 20

The Team


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For more Le Nurb information, including a back issue archive and full submission guidelines, take a look at our updated minisite

News/Arts & Reviews Designer James ‘Escape the Country’ Squire Features/Sport Designer Jo ‘Remember More’ Barnard PHOTOGRAPHY Lead Photographer Adil ‘Be Awesome’ Khan Deshmukh

Advertising Le Nurb is distributed eight times a year, across campus, to a network of 15,000 students. We offer great rates to advertisers, plus discounts for on-campus clubs, societies and organisations. Find out more at or via the Editor. To book an advertising slot, call Bonnie Crate on 01895 267215. The deadline for inclusion in issue 6 is Tuesday, February 7.

All articles and pictures © their respective authors unless otherwise indicated. Views expressed are those of the writers and do not reflect the official position of UBS or Brunel University. All comments and complaints about content in Le Nurb should be addressed to the Editor in the first instance: Complaints will only be entertained where it can be proven that an article or graphic is: factually inaccurate; breaches the Press Complaints Commission’s Editors’ Code of Practice; breaches the National Union of Journalists’ Code of Conduct; breaks the law; or encourages readers to break the law. No complaint that fails to satisfy at least one of these criteria will be upheld. Published by: Union of Brunel Students, Kingston Lane, Uxbridge, UB8 3PH. Printed by: Harmsworth Printing Derby, Northcliffe House, Meadow Road, Derby, DE1 2BH.

Oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhhh, oh-oh-oh-ohhhh, oh-oh-oh, caught in a bad romance (please recycle) (x2).

January 2012 - Le Nurb


Brunel’s new VC Amy Blackford Le Nurb is happy to report the appointment of Brunel University’s next Vice-Chancellor and Principal, Professor Julia Buckingham. The news was announced to students, via IntraBrunel, on January 9. Professor Buckingham will succeed the current ViceChancellor, Professor Chris Jenks, on October 1. Professor Buckingham said: “I am delighted to have been appointed as Vice-Chancellor of Brunel and I am looking forward to building on the strengths in research and education that Professor Jenks has developed to take the University to new heights.” Chair of Council Jane Kelly said: “Council is very pleased to have appointed Julia to be our next ViceChancellor. She was an outstanding candidate in a strong field of applicants and demonstrates the skills, commitment and enthusiasm to build on Brunel’s strengths and aspirations.”

Professor Buckingham is the first woman to be appointed as Vice-Chancellor and Principal at Brunel, following a rigorous selection process. Applications for the post opened on October 6 and closed on October 31 last year. There were formal interviews that took place over two days. The first day saw candidates tour the campus. As well as being interviewed by the Selection Committee, the candidates were asked to lead a discussion with selected groups of staff and students on topics that will have direct relevance to leading the University. A final interview took place on the second day where the candidates were asked to make a presentation to the Selection Committee. Le Nurb would like to congratulate Professor Buckingham on her new appointment and wishes Professor Chris Jenks all the best in his future endeavours.

Image credit here Brunel University

Carr’s New Year Specstacular pulled in nearly two million viewers.

News In Brief Cheap rules As part of the 2012 Olympic Games, the Royal Mint has launched a new 50p piece that helpfully explains the offside rule. The tail side of the coin shows a very simple design, made by Neil Wolfson. Mr Wolfson said: “If I had 50p for every time someone had asked me to explain the offside rule I’d be a very rich man.” Unfortunately for him, the coin mistakenly illustrates the offside rule before it was revised in 1995.

A charming app A 12-year-old boy has been the victim of abuse from an iPhone app. He was playing with Siri - the new iOS service that answers any question you ask it, when he asked the app “How many people are there in the world?” Rather charmingly, the app responded with “Shut the f**k up.”

Professor Buckingham is currently Pro-Rector for Education and Academic Affairs at Imperial College London.

A Brunel student wins £2,012 damo1977


Amy Blackford A Brunel student has won an amazing £2,012 after appearing on the Channel 4 programme Alan Carr’s New Year Specstacular. Mill Hall Head Contact Kelly Foster was picked by JLS star Marvin Humes as a contestant. She competed against another crowd member in several rounds before winning the money. Marcus Bernasconi, who went along to the show recording with Kelly said: “When Kelly won the £2012 it was incredible! We stageinvaded and I might have knocked

Sir Steve Redgrave visit Phil Guest

someone over because I was a little excited. She did well considering all we thought we were getting was a free drink.” The first round saw JLS member Ortise compete against bandmate Aston on Kelly’s behalf in a round in which they were given electric shocks. The second round saw Kelly reunite with Marvin and play The 2,012 Pound Drop. Well done, Kelly, and we’ll see you in Loco’s - think the next round is on you!

Amy Blackford Sport legend Sir Steve Redgrave visited Brunel University on November 30. Sir Steve met with a group of student Sports Makers to discuss how to make sport happen on a local level. The Sports Makers scheme forms part of Sport England’s ‘Places People Play’ Olympic legacy programme, which launched in October. The students joined Sir Steve on a run as he learned about the different ways that Brunel students have got involved. Sir Steve won five gold medals in five successive Olympic Games between 1984 to 2000. Redgrave has also turned his attention to fundraising, by setting up The Steve Redgrave Fund in 2001. Third year Sport Sciences student Emma Gibb said: “I was really nervous when I found out that I was going to meet Sir Steve Redgrave but he really is a genuinely nice, down to earth person.” A recent series of conventions and workshops have helped to find 60 Brunel University students who are now Sports Makers.

Sir Steve Redgrave was recently given the BBC Sports Personality of the Year’s Lifetime Achievement Award. Ra-ra-ah-ah-ah, roma, roma-ma, Gaga, ooh la la, wanjurbaromaance (please recycle) (x2).

Robinette Hood A woman from Boston who admitted to robbing a bank was caught a few hours later giving the money to local children in the parks playground. She has been dubbed ‘The Female Robin Hood’ and is set to undergo psychiatric treatment.

Smoking John Terry can kill A new anti-smoking campaign in India depicts a blurred image of England football captain John Terry with the words ‘Smoking Kills’ underneath. However, it appears as though no permission to use the footballer was sought by the company. Representatives of Terry are now seeking legal advice.

Naked man with kids In an embarrassing moment, a French fashion retailer has released an image of four children wearing their new line of beachwear, unaware that there is a naked man standing in the background. La Redoute has apologised for the mistake but montages have already appeared on the internet of where the naked man has also appeared, supposedly including the Moon landing and Kim Jong Il’s funeral.

Talk about a grudge In Italy, a 99-year-old man is to divorce his 96-year-old wife after he found out she had an affair over 70 years ago. The couple, who had been married for 77 years, are set to become the world’s oldest couple to divorce. He found out about her betrayal after he discovered love letters from a secret affair she had during the 1940s.


Le Nurb - January 2012


Brunel professor gives Leveson evidence ZK Goh Brunel professor Julian Petley was among a number of academics called to give evidence to the Leveson Inquiry on December 8. Professor Petley, a professor of Screen Media and Journalism at the School of Arts, was invited to present his views to the inquiry, held at the Royal Courts of Justice, based on his expertise in dealing with issues regarding press freedom. Professor Petley appeared alongside Professor Ian Hargreaves of Cardiff University as well as Dr Daithí Mac Síthigh of the University of East Anglia Law School. Amongst the subjects discussed at the hearing was the regulation of the press. Professor Petley said he would not keep the current system of voluntary media regulation, which happens through the Press Complaints Commission (PCC). He told the inquiry: “I think it’s very important that the regulatory process should be as independent

of government as possible, and should for the most part be in the hands of the press itself. Not by the way of present editors, which is one of the problems with the PCC.” Cardiff’s Professor Hargreaves agreed, saying that he could see why Richard Desmond’s newspapers were not affiliated to the PCC: “The feeling that they were being invited into a club where somebody else had got all the best seats and was really driving it, I wouldn’t have wanted to join it either.” The panel was also asked about the quality of journalism students and the accreditation of journalism courses, as well as the teaching of ethics. Both Brunel’s undergraduate and postgraduate courses in journalism are accredited by the National Council for the Training of Journalists (NCTJ), but Professor Petley argued students were receiving more than just NCTJ training.

He said: “One wouldn’t want to simply run the NCTJ syllabus and nothing else. We very much regard our courses as ‘NCTJ plus’. “We lay great stress on the teaching of ethics. I hope that a concern with ethics informs everything we do. My feeling is if one stuck solely to the NCTJ syllabus, on the whole one would not be giving the students an adequate grounding in ethics. “I would argue that the ethical components of everything we teach are part of the ‘plus’.” Lord Justice Leveson is conducting the government’s inquiry into the culture, practice and ethics of the press, set up after the News of the World phone hacking scandal was revealed. The first phase of the hearing, concerning issues related to the press and the public, will end in January. Further hearings relating to the press and the police, as well as the press and politicians, will take place later this year.

Brunel University

Lord Justice Leveson has signalled that he expects the press to carry out substantial regulatory reform.

NUS anger over fee waiver policy World Economic Forum

Clegg has been heavily criticised for breaking his promise to vote against tuition fee increases.

George Bowden The National Union of Students (NUS) has asked Liberal Democrat leader and Deputy Prime Minister Nick Clegg to explain his party’s support for changes made to the higher education funding system. The NUS claim that a Coalition policy has removed a further £70m which would otherwise have been allocated to students through bursaries and scholarships. The introduction of ‘fee waivers’ came as more institutions elected to charge the maximum fee level of £9,000 than had been planned. 24 institutions did lower their planned charges to £7,500 and have largely chosen to reward students who would have previously qualified for bursaries and scholarships with fee waivers instead.

While undergraduates hope to be able to pay off their student loans within 30 years of graduating, the NUS says “most graduates will never see the benefit” of fee waivers. It believes most students will not see the lower loan repayments that fee waivers offer and the reforms also mean many won’t see the advantage of a cash injection while in higher education. NUS President Liam Burns said: “Mr Clegg and his colleagues promised that a £150m National Scholarship Programme would support students but in effect not only will none of this money reach students’ pockets but there will actually be a drop of £70m. “Fee waivers are a con trick that will only benefit graduates who

are earning enough to pay off their student loans within 30 years. They help the Treasury, who have to spend less on loans, but are of no benefit to students whatsoever.” Mr Burns also says that with the NUS annual conference being held in Sheffield this year, the Deputy Prime Minister should attend and respond to the criticism levelled at the government scheme. He said: “The perverse incentives of the Government’s changes mean that poorer pupils are encouraged towards courses and universities that have less funding… I challenge Mr Clegg to face the students whose vote he courted at the last election and explain his continued support for these disastrous reforms.”

Female students get higher grades in WRITE FOR US! same-sex classes blmurch

Send us your news article:

Le Nurb accepts submissions from any Brunel student. Full details on page 2.

Bess Browning Students at Essex University took part in a research study which found that girls do better in singlesex classes at university. Eight hundred Economics and Business Studies students took part in the investigation that supported research of school-age pupils, which showed that girls were much more competitive and committed in same-sex classes. Dr Patrick Nolen and Professor Alison Booth were running the study and found that female students had a 7.5% boost in exam scores when not taking part in mixed-sex classes. Attendance was shown to be one of major reasons for the results,

as findings showed that female students were much more likely to turn up to classes if the class was all girls. On average, girls in mixed-gender groups only attended 63% of their mandatory classes, compared to girls in single-sex groups where they attended 71% of classes. Teri Evans is a Business student at Brunel and said: “It’s all well and good that girls are doing better in classes without guys, but it’s not exactly reflective of today’s society. They might not get as good grades but there’s a very small difference and girls would lose out on very important social skills if they were always in same-sex classes.”

Single-sex classes had negligible effects on coursework, however. I want your ugly, I want your disease. I want your everything as long as it’s free (please recycle).

January 2012 - Le Nurb



Willetts’ Labour proposals George Bowden Universities Minister David Willetts has said Labour proposals to charge higher paid graduates more and cap tuition fees at £6,000, have “enormous problems” and were “deeply muddled.” The comments came after Labour leader Ed Miliband announced his party would cut tuition fees by a third, to a maximum of £6,000, down from the £9,000 limit introduced by the Coalition government. In a letter to Shabana Mahmood, the Shadow Higher Education Minister, Mr Willetts outlined why he thought Labour’s plans would increase the deficit further and cause a potential funding gap. He wrote: “Your proposals assume there will be higher repayments from graduates on

the highest salaries… But your particular model has enormous problems that you appear to have ignored.” He also highlights the fact that under the proposals, a Labour government would take the same amount from graduates in their first years of employment as the Coalition’s scheme will do. Mr Willetts continued: “First, you claim that the extra payments will be made by the 10 percent of graduates who earn over £65,000 in each and every year of their working life – a somewhat implausible sum given that graduate starting salaries are closer to £25,000… in the meantime, you would either need to cut funding or increase the deficit.” However, since the introduction of the Coalition scheme, a large number of universities, including

Brunel, opted to charge the £9,000 maximum. Last year, it was announced 24 universities were cutting their planned fee level to £7,500, in order to take advantage of up to 20,000 additional places. Responding to the criticism, Shabana Mahmood said: “The trebling of tuition fees and the core and margin model have created great upheaval in our higher education sector – putting our hard won global reputation at risk. “The rapid pace of the changes – both to student finance and to the way student places are being allocated are distracting universities from one of the key things that they are meant to be doing. The government are out of touch on the effect that their policies are having on universities.”


Confusion continues over proposed tuition fees promised by Labour.

Triumph for Brunel Business School Manisha Matharu Brunel Business School earns a place among the top 20 Business Schools in 2011 in the UK. The Financial Times has ranked Brunel at an impressive 20th place, with London Business School being named the UK’s top Business School of 2011. Brunel’s Business School has also done the University proud in the Financial Times European rankings for 2011 at 73rd place. This is an improvement on last

year’s position of 75th place and a significant achievement for Brunel, considering that the Business School did not rank at all in 2009. However, this is not the only recognition that the Business School has had lately. It has gone from strength to strength this year, rising drastically from 89th place out of 93 UK Business Schools in 2010, to 29th place out of 94 UK Business Schools this year, according to the

National Student Survey (NSS) for 2011. This remarkable progress for the Business School can be attributed to the University’s success in meeting the needs of its students. The NSS for 2011 reports that Brunel is the UK’s “most improved university for student satisfaction.” The Head of Brunel’s Business School expressed his delight at these recent accomplishments on the University’s website.

Professor Zahir Irani said that “the Business School’s performance is nothing short of outstanding.” Business is not the only subject getting the glory at Brunel this year. Other subjects that have ranked highly include Art and Design, History, and Biology. These subjects join Brunel’s Business School in the top quartile of their respective sectors, as seen in the Sunday Times University Guide 2012.

Yet the Business School will definitely be reaping the reward for bringing Brunel into the limelight. Vice-Chancellor Professor Chris Jenks has announced on the Brunel’s website that “the University is poised to open a brand new building to host its Business School [in 2012] as part of a long-term plan to create a unique environment in which to deliver an excellent experience for our students.”

Student outrage as transport fares rise Grace Witherden As of Monday, January 2nd, rail fares have risen by up to 11%. This will have a significant effect on the many students at Brunel University (and other students studying in London) who have to commute every day using London transport services. Single Oyster bus fares will go up by 5p, while a seven-day bus and tram pass will increase by £1. Boris Johnson defended the rise in fares, believing “if you don’t invest in London transport it will simply burst apart at the seams.” However, this decision will have fundamental consequences on millions of UK citizens. Research revealed that London already has the most expensive transport in the world. A single journey in Zones 1-4 at peak time costs £3.60. This is over twice as much as a similar journey in New York, where it costs £1.56, in Paris £1.46, Milan £1.29, and Copenhagen £2.77. The rise in fares will particularly affect students, especially next year when students will be forced to deal with the rise in university fees and these increased transport fares.

Sophie Hart, a fresher at Brunel University, is one of the many students disappointed with the rise in fares, stating: “The rise in transport costs will have a direct impact on students. We already pay a substantial amount in order to study at university, and the rise in transport costs will only add to the money pressures and worries that seem to be surrounding students nowadays.” This increase will also affect students that have a part-time job who will now have to spend more in order to earn more. The Labour and LibDem groups have said it was unfair to introduce the fare rises at a time when Londoners were struggling to cope financially. Ken Livingstone, the former Mayor of London, joined 40 campaigners outside London Bridge station in protest against the fares earlier this week. With the London Mayoral election approaching in May, Boris Johnson may regret his decision to increase the fares, as Ken Livingstone has claimed he will reduce transport costs, which would be good news for all students!


Ken Livingstone has pledged to cut fares by 7% and save the average transport user £1,000 over four years. I want your love. Love, love, love! I want your love (please recycle).


Le Nurb - January 2012


I want your drama, the touch of your hand. I want your leather-studded kiss in the sand (please recycle).

January 2012 - Le Nurb



NUS right to reply Kanja Sesay The following is a response from the NUS Black Officer with regards to an article from the December issue of Le Nurb entitled ‘White Students Need Not Apply’. Racism, sexism, homophobia and disablism are a reality that finds expression in different guises and different contexts across many students’ daily experiences. To suggest otherwise, or to leave those individual students to address this society-wide issue would be a serious abrogation of the entire student community’s responsibility to our classmates, our friends, and our family. NUS works with students at colleges and universities across Britain to offer positive support and representation to challenge

racism and promote strong and inclusive campuses. The message of the poster is clear: given that the reality of racism is harsh and it continues to manifest itself in many different forms and expressions, this poster campaign successfully captures and confronts this multidimensional reality of racism and provokes a great deal of debate about how we convert paper legislation into genuine social and cultural practice in Britain and beyond. Hate crime figures from the Association of Chief Police Officers show that around 50,000 incidents were reported. Many more go unreported. Give the alarmingly high number of reports in Britain it is essential that we are to identify and strategise how to effectively and permanently

eradicate the scourge of racism on campuses and in the community Already, 75% of Britain’s Black communities live in 88 of Britain’s poorest wards. Nearly half of Pakistani and Bangladeshi

Black people are seven times likely to be stopped by police than white people. households are below poverty line. Furthermore, job applications from people with African or Asian sounding names are turned down

more often than English sounding ones. Add this to the issue of jobs with current high unemployment rate, Black students are three times more likely to be unemployed than white graduates within six months of graduation and are expected to earn up to 9% less for the same work within five years. A recent figures from the Ministry of Justice figures found that there has been 70% increased in the number of Black people stopped and search by the police over the last 5 years. Already Black people are seven times more likely to be stopped by the police than white people. This poster has been one of the most popular materials of the campaign precisely because it embodies the lived experience of young black people. It is good to

hear that Brunel has a large ACS and is a welcoming environment for other liberation groups - however, in our experience, this does not mean Black students do not face oppression off campus, and neither is it the case that every union has such provisions. The materials of the NUS Black Students Campaign are here for all these unions. Finally, the premise that ‘white students need not apply’ is a contortion of reality. Before the creation of the NUS Black students officer, the NUS elected an all-white executive body - our campaign works within the NUS, and with students unions, to address the under-representation of black students that is still apparent in the student movement and beyond.

how you can get involved. Brunel Labour Students is now (less than three months after being founded) the most active political party society at the university. If you expected its members to sit back and relax as a result, you’d be wrong. With impromptu meetings and discussions, weekly society socials, and even local election campaigning, Brunel Labour Student’s members rarely sit still. We have an elected committee in the society, consisting of myself as President; Vice-President Nav Rana; Treasurer Sam Donoghue; Secretary Josh Mattocks; Campaigns and Events Manager Rob Barnstone; and Web Officer Rory Lewis. Rob says “Join the Labour Society in our campaign

for the Labour Candidate in the Feltham and Heston ByElection in the upcoming week. We try to have a healthy balance of campaigns and socials in our society and it is a great way to meet like-minded people.” In the words of Gordon Brown, “We changed the world before and we’re going to change the world again!”

Brunel Labour Society Party. We also work with Hillingdon Labour Councillors to improve relations between them and young people. You may see posters around campus advertising our society and


People are angry at how the Government are acting - we are the only alternative. I encourage you to contact us, come along to either one of our meetings, or one of our regular socials to see

FIND OUT MORE You can follow us on Twitter (@BrunelLabour), join our group on Facebook (Brunel Labour Students), or email Kerri for more details:

Ed Miliband and some cushions. Forever optimistic, changing the world one tweet at a time. Kerri-Anne Prince Once upon a time, in the land of Brunel University, a group of lefties joined together to create a Labour Society. Unfortunately, this isn’t a fairy tale, this is real life and we’re all part of the generation that has seen youth unemployment rise to one million – which was never that high whilst under 13 years of Labour. Many young people are apathetic towards politics. They either think that it’s boring or that politics doesn’t affect them. One of our aims as a Labour Society is to raise awareness about how politics affects our everyday lives. We have had a surging interest in politics due to the tuition

fee rise, and young people are taking more of a stand against government decisions. Labour made mistakes in their 13 years of power. But they are also the party that achieved the winter fuel allowance; cancer guarantee; record results in schools; the disability discrimination act; civil partnerships; half a million children out of poverty; the minimum wage; and the first ever climate change act. These are just some of Labour’s achievements, and there will be more. Our national membership has increased by more than 65,000 since the 2010 General Election – people are angry at how the Government is acting, and we are the only alternative. As a Labour Society, we are committed to the cause of supporting national and local campaigns alongside the Labour

Labour Society Say ‘yes’ to Labour!


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I want your love. Love, love, love! I want your love (please recycle).

Le Nurb accepts submissions from any Brunel student. Full details on page 2.


Le Nurb - January 2012


Make 2012 your best year yet Passionate English student changing the world with words. Daniella Nzekwe The Christmas break is officially over. All that excessive eating and drinking, is making itself felt around your middle. I know that January isn’t the best of months, but you still have student loan to look forward to. Another good thing about January is that you can start to make goals for the year ahead. I don’t believe in New Year’s resolutions, you properly would have broken yours by the time you read this. It doesn’t mean that you’re a failure; chances are you were trying to achieve too much at once. The most popular resolutions are to lose weight and stop smoking. If either of those is something you would like to do, then you don’t need to spend a fortune. Just cut down. The expert say that it takes 21 days to develop a new habit, it’s not surprising that so many people don’t last a week. We all have busy lives and it’s a constant juggling act to fit everything in. To make things simple why don’t you have just one goal for 2012? If you have one main goal then it will be easier to work towards it. We are always pressured to make a long list of changes. What you need to ask yourself is, are all those changes necessary? You were happy enough to live with those things in last year so what

makes this year any different? When I sat down to write my “2012 goals,” it turned into an endless list of unachievable things. Just another list of resolutions but with a fancier name. I didn’t want to end the New Year feeling like a failure so decided to set myself one main goal. That was to be happy, simple and straightforward. Then I asked myself how I could achieve real happiness this year. By the time I was finished, I had a spider diagram with happiness in the middle, and all the things that contributed to my happiness scribbled around it. This left me

I always wonder why I can never start my work on time, even with the best intentions. I have realised that my time management won’t improve unless I take active steps to make it better.This could be reading books, making to-do lists or starting a piece of work the day I get it. The problem with university work is that we have a long time to do it. This gives us a false sense of security, making

us think that we have lots of time to complete it. Having good time management can make your life less stressful, meaning that you have more time to enjoy the things that are important to you. Whatever your goals are for this year, achieving them takes commitment. We should all be used to this word by now. We hear it all the time, but many of us don’t think about what it means. If you

want to improve your grades, then you need to read your feedback forms and take into account what the marker has said. Go to the library and do addition research. It could even be as simple as missing that party, so that you can wake up with a clear mind for your 9am lecture. Never lose sight of the real reason you came to university. Happy New Year and may all your dreams come true.

Never lose sight of the real reason you came to University. with a clear action plan on how I could sustain long term happiness. You should do the same and you will be surprised at how achievable your goal is. Now that you have set your goal for 2012, its time to look at other aspects of your life. If you’re anything like me you are always doing your work late and going through unnecessary stress to hand it in on time. Every term, I say that I am going to improve my time management but it never happens.

ernohannink Happiness is not a destination.

Life after university

Never lose sight of the real reason you came to University.


I don’t make mistakes because I’m stupid, I make them because I want to learn. Enkeled Robo The majority claim that the best years of our lives are spent at University, so what happens next? Well, there are many options. For the curious ones, there’s travelling (although with the hardships faced of finding a job, it could even be for the lazy, relaxed and unfortunate ones). Those who look to further their knowledge (or who just want to increase their chances of employment) could go on to do a Masters, and if they are very keen, perhaps going on to do a PhD. Also, with the increasing hardships of the labour market, one must do all they can as to promote themselves and stand out from the crowd in order to get chosen for the job that gives them the highest level of satisfaction. With competition for employability growing, most firms are now looking for graduates who have a 2:1 degree or a first. Although it may seem daunting, it isn’t, because a graduate doesn’t just apply to one firm, therefore they spread their chances of being employed. Also, let’s not forget that firms look for experience as well as an acceptable degree. Therefore, if

Who says uni life has to end? You know that I want you, and you know that I need you. I want your bad, your bad romance (please recycle).

you have a 2:1 or a first, as well as plenty of experience and nonacademic achievements, you should be fine. The greatest temptation after leaving University and having a well-paid job is finding someplace to live alone, in your own discretion. After doing some research, the advice I found out was for graduates to keep living as if they were still going to University. By that I mean sharing a house with friends, and saving up. Besides, let’s not forget that once you graduate, if you have taken out student loans, sadly you will be in debt. The sooner you repay that debt, the sooner you’ll feel relieved, refreshed and can get on with your life. Although one would enjoy their discrete life by being alone, let’s not rule out that, time is nearly always spent better with friends and in good company. After all, it wouldn’t kill you if you kept on sharing a house with your closest friends. In fact, you would most probably enjoy life even more after spending the day at work, the remainder of the day will be spent with mates. So after University, although the setting might change; with you most inevitably getting a job, the best thing to do is to save up, clear your debt (if you have any) and keep that University lifestyle going for a little bit longer.

January 2012 - Le Nurb



Best summer work experience ever! Sociology and Media student. Cameron Greene This summer I swam in lakes, hiked in mountains, and partied in New York City. I did something crazy and kind of stupid; I decided to spend my summer taking care off disadvantaged homeless children in New York. Yes, I left the luxuries of my own home and travelled to the States to work with brats. I decided to take part in Bunac’s Summer Camp experience and worked as a general counsellor at

Camp Homeward Bound, a camp dedicated to the wonders and delights of disadvantaged children. I worked with the youngsters; I had six kids aged between 7 and 8 in my tent. These delightful children cursed at me, threw rocks at me, and straight up threw punches Let me tell you it was damn hard work. But I have already applied to go back next year. So what’s pulling me back to these delightful children and how can this be the best summer experience ever? You build an unimaginable bond with the kids and there were some amazing times, which is why people are drawn back to camp. I was able to travel to America and

do something that really makes a difference to children’s lives. I had kids tell me about the most horrific living conditions and the same day burst out in laughter. As a general counsellor, it was up to you to bring these children back to a place of fun and laughter. The idea you can take them from any background and bring them back to the carefree and fun period of childhood is overwhelming and brings out all kinds of emotions in both the counsellors and kids. What is hard to believe is how much you change after working with these kids, you don’t realise it until leavers day when counsellors and kids are in tears. These kids

are tough but very lovable. The working environment was also fun. I lived and worked with the same people, which meant I cried with these people when it got too much, laughed at the good times and generally enjoyed their company. We did dumb things like wear tight T-shirts for tight t-shirt day and have camp-wide soccer matches. I also built close friendships, and if you’re as lovable as me, these friendships result in free accommodation come travel time. One also has to note the friendliness of the lady counsellors. If you’ve got a sexy British accent, it isn’t hard to

Avoiding the rocks and punches at Bunac’s Summer Camp

Tea drinker, wine lover, hand sanitiser user and abuser. Simi Sagoo Five things to get really excited about - before the world ends…

OLYMPICS & PARALYMPICS Yes, it is finally here, the London 2012 games! All eyes will be on our capital as we get set to host the greatest show on earth, and for many, the greatest event of our lifetimes. As students of Brunel, there is no reason why we shouldn’t feel proud, as our university is the official London 2012 Olympic training camp for the Republic of Korea Olympic team. So, whilst the weather may be dull, let us be swept by all the glory surrounding us as we witness only the most anticipated sporting event thus far!

THE DIAMOND JUBILEE Starting the summer with a bang is Her Majesty’s Diamond Jubilee – celebrating 60 years of reign. (And probably 60 years of rain too!) But the best part? Aside from the buzz in the capital, the street parties and the spectacle at the palace – it means a four day weekend! EURO 2012 Beer, barbecues and much footballing banter could only mean one thing – Euro 2012! Hosted in Poland and Ukraine,

I had kids tell me about the most horrific living conditions and the same day burst out in laughter. York City, to the Yankee stadium, the Brooklyn Bridge and even the Bronx Zoo. After a week, we travelled to New Jersey to go to Six Flags, a hugely popular theme park, I’m telling you, Thorpe Park and Alton Towers ain’t got nothing on Six Flags; it was the best theme park I’ve ever been too. After Jersey, we went to Boston to stay with yet another friend from camp at her university. I enjoyed my time in the States so much I called the Bunac office to defer my flight back so I could enjoy myself a little more before I went home to reality. On my last day I went out to dinner with my new friends and we planned our trips for next year. After all the fun I had, it’s hard to believe I did something worthwhile, but the way this summer boosted my CV is crazy. I developed my communication, organisational and interpersonal skills. I have already seen the results; three job interviews in two weeks. In hindsight I can see it Zwas one of my best decisions ever. Bunac placed me in the most amazing camp and I am grateful I got to see those amazing kids. I had all sorts of fun and made true friends. This summer was the best. Until 2012, America.

Cameron Greene

Five things to look forward to in 2012

find yourself a friend, and having frequent visits to the A field. Amongst the counsellors, visits to the A field were labelled slam time. Yes slam time was fun, sometimes you have so much fun you forget the time and end up sneaking back to camp after curfew. On days off we would get a hotel in the city and party all night, and then the next day we’d drive to the beach for a few hours before heading back to camp. After camp, we travel and everyone’s on the same minimal budget. I stayed with friends in the Bronx and we went all over New

will it be England who take centre stage? Unlike the World Cup, there are just 16 teams and with Spain, Germany and France all involved we are in for a treat and a taste of some great football action. JAMES BOND

For hours of escapist fun, the New

Year sees the new James Bond movie hit the big screens. The title was recently confirmed to be Skyfall and the movie will very much be sold as part of the 50th anniversary of the first Bond

I want your loving and I want your revenge; you and me could write a bad romance (ohhhh, please recycle).

big screen adaptation. Expect action, adventure and a multitalented cast. TOTAL SOLAR ECLIPSE As a natural phenomenon that doesn’t occur too often, this year is the year of the total solar eclipse. On the 13th November, the moon will pass between the Earth and the sun whereby the disk of the bright sun becomes fully obscured. Unfortunately, to see this spectacle in all its glory, you will have to fly to Australia.


Le Nurb - January 2012

FEATURES Stephen Carlile

Some Jimmy Choo’s for you?

Jimmy Choo for men… Fashion correspondent, living life in the moment. Devina Sanghani Oh yes, boys, it’s exactly how it sounds. At last, men around the world wondering what all the fuss concerning their girlfriend’s, sister’s or wife’s obsession for Jimmy Choo shoes are about

to find out for themselves. The luxury shoe, handbag and women’s fragrance label announces a debut shoe collection for men. Jimmy Choo was established in 1996, with co- founder and British Vogue Editor, Tamara Mellon. The shoes have since been seen all over the red carpet, and have become an essential item in every woman’s wardrobe. From bridal, to animal print, to evening glamour, the luxurious

Jimmy Choo shoe has never failed women! But finally, it’s not just about them. In 2002, the brand discontinued their small men’s range in order to fully concentrate on their exceedingly successful women’s collection. However, following their collaboration with Swedish high street fashion house H&M, which sold out globally within a week, Tamara concluded that there is significant demand for Jimmy Choo men’s products.

Thus, men’s footwear becomes the Italian fashion company’s exciting new project: “I am thrilled to introduce men’s shoes to the Jimmy Choo world. My vision of the Jimmy Choo man is one who exudes confidence and style whether he is an artist or an investment banker. The first thing I look at on a man is his shoes,” reveals Tamara Mellon, cofounder and chief creative officer of Jimmy Choo.

This new collection caters for almost every occasion, including classic dress shoes, casual biker boots, high-top trainers, moccasins and even velvet evening slippers. The men’s line will reflect the same core values as the rest of the Jimmy Choo brand, applying a modern sophistication, polish and style to the men’s footwear market. So look out boys, who said fashion is for females?!

Why does my TV hate me? I have been here too damn long. Ben Moxey There was a time when I got on with my TV. It would sit in the corner of the room and gurgle sweet noises to me. Like a square Furby. But in the last few years, it seems that Old Flickering Faithful has it in for me. This all started with soaps (as it always does). In the UK, sometimes these shows can be a great exponent of social change like the AIDS story lines in EastEnders in the 1990s when even the mention of “AIDS” was enough to give people the heebiegeebies. The “gay cancer” would

lurk around corners or on toilet seats to get them and make them look like those folks on Children In Need. Frequently, UK soaps show people on the breadline or in ‘working-class’ areas like the East End or Manchester. Or a farm. But across the pond, soaps have an all-together more bubble-gum appearance. Think Days of Our Lives and the poor acting that Joey from Friends put in, then double it. That’s about right. And this lack of any social punch means that they are able to dispense with any reality like jobs or bills and go right for the fluff. Dallas wasn’t the first but it is the biggest culprit. The premise from the off is a wealthy Texas family who make their money in oil and in cattle-ranching. That’s it. They don’t have a disabled

Ben Sutherland

cousin, they don’t have to scrape by on food stamps. They don’t even do their own laundry. So, with a show so disconnected from the public, the ratings must have reflected this? Wrong, it was the number 1 ranked show in the US for three years in the 80s. It seemed that people wanted to see their TV have fun with money and be rich and spit at us for not being. It created the worst thing to come from America since the word ‘gotten;’ it created ‘aspirational TV.’ You must aspire to be like them. Here however, the word ‘aspiration’ isn’t used like it would be in the sentence “It’s that young boy’s aspiration to climb the Himalayas after his foot transplant.” No, it’s used in more of a “I aspire to be so rich I have money oozing out of most of my pores like a teenage Midas” kinda fashion. The shows like Dallas and The Young and the Restless show you, that while the characters in the show have ups and downs with murder, pregnancy and alien abduction, it has nothing to do with the fact that they have money, yeh? They are just bad people, but imagine how much worse their life would be if they were poor? They couldn’t afford that massage to help ease the pain of a long-lost Spanish brother showing up! For shame! So you want money don’t you? Lots of it? Good, that’s the capitalist way! Cycle forward 30 years and what are we left with? Shows where the

central plot and premise are as bland as communion wafers and just lauded. People go out of their way to shit themselves inside out about Gossip Girl, The OC, 90210 and One Tree Hill – to name just some. The central premise hasn’t made huge leaps forward: rich people with oodles of cash so they do not have to work live in swanky, spacious and well-heated apartments in New York or villas in California. They have maids, they have blogs they update in Starbucks while drinking a mochafrocha-choka-hoccus-poccus with extra pretentiousness and they all, to the person, are vacuous and vain and other v words that make them sound like bastards. Why does my TV show me this? Why does it hate my lifestyle of being a poor student? Why does my TV hate me? Problem is that many young people watch these shows in their droves and seem to think that either this life is attainable or that it should be celebrated in some way. Years ago, the American dream was that freedom created the opportunity for prosperity and success and that every man had the right to start a business and make a success “regardless of social class or circumstances of birth.” Let’s gloss over the race bit though. Now however the ‘dream’ is to suddenly discover a large wad of cash and not to work for it. To have a large Manhattan apartment, ignoring the fact that city rates are exorbitant in the

Don’t let it consume you. I want your loving, oh, your lover’s revenge, you and me could write a bad romance (please recycle).

area and that it regularly reaches 30°C and higher in the summer, making the place unlivable. To have a maid that you treat like shit and when an outsider (or in this case, a non-viewer) asks why they are so mean, just brush it off with a “it’s our little joke” and flutter your eyelashes. In the last sentence I came dangerously close to singing the Internacionalé, so I will back track. I am not one of those people who will happily camp on the steps of St. Pauls like it is a concrete Butlins, wailing about capitalism and still buying a Panini from Costa. I have no large issue with capitalism; it works for me. I know it does not work for a lot of other people, and that it is where people like me can help by giving money or time to go and directly aid them, not having a drum circle. But when it comes to my TV telling me that to have a great life I need to be rich and have a smug and conceited blog/ band/child, well then I think it is time for me to fetch my beret, dig my tent out of the cupboard and march on Wall Street... Arise, ye workers from your slumber, Arise, ye prisoners of want... FIND OUT MORE For more deeply hypocritical musings from Moxey, or to join in on the debate about the NUS Black Students article printed in last month’s Le Nurb, check out his blog:

January 2012 - Le Nurb

THE ARC The Advice and Representation Centre (ARC), part of the Union of Brunel Students, is once again hosting the annual Housing Fayre which is an event to provide essential information and guidance to the large proportion of students living in accommodation in the local area. The ARC is committed to promoting and maintaining the welfare of students. We offer free, impartial and confidential advice to students on a wide range of issues, of which housing advice is one of the main concerns of students visiting the ARC. We aim to raise awareness amongst students of the housing services available to them, the issues surrounding housing, how they can find private rent accommodation, and what to think about once they move in. The Housing Fayre will be held on Tuesday 7th February 2012, between 11am and 2pm, in the Atrium, Hamilton Centre. In previous years the Housing Fayre has been extremely successful with over 400 students in attendance over the day. We aim to build on the success of past years and reach as many students as possible through the participation of organisations such as key departments at London Borough of Hillingdon including the Private Sector Housing Team; Community Safety Team, Off-campus Housing Office, Endsleigh Insurance, London Fire Service. Also you can meet and register with local letting agents – NuPad; Coopers: and Gibbs Gillespie. This will give students an opportunity to review selected student rental properties and sign up to accommodation from Summer 2012. So on 7th February why not drop by, meet the ARC team, look out for the giveaways and get loads of information and guidance on taking your first steps into the private rental housing sector?

Upcoming events... NEW FOR JANUARY - Drop-in sessions: Tuesdays at the Student Centre, between 10am and 12pm. 17th January/24th January/31st January. No appointment needed Cook a meal for 4 for £6 – yes, it can be done! All you budding Heston Blumenthals and Jamie Olivers: this is a challenge to get you using those pots and pans to cook up the most inventive recipes to share with your housemates for a budget-busting cost. Come and visit the Money Doctors in the Atrium, Hamilton Centre between 12 and 2pm on January 30 to see that it can be done with some sample meals that we have cooked up. The best recipes will have the chance to win restaurant vouchers, so give it a go... Clothes Exchange What it says on the tin. Come down to the Hamilton Centre Atrium and exchange with your student friends those clothes and bags that you no longer need. While you’re at it, you can pick up something else that catches your eye. Check out our Facebook page ( and the Money Doctors website for further updates -   You can also contact us at if you have a money question for a Money Adviser.

Moving in... Moving in isn’t just about having a housewarming party! There are some things you should look out for - being cautious will minimise potential hassle. Follow the steps outlined here to have an enjoyable renting experience! Your contract: Take a good look at your contract; know the terms and conditions and your rights as a tenant. We run a contract checking service, so you can be sure of what you are getting into! Looking around the property: Make a note of anything that needs to be repaired or cleaned and take photographs with dates on if you can- this will help prove you are not responsible for any damage caused by previous tenants. Is the property ready for you to move in? If you cannot move in on the agreed date because of major works being carried out, call into the ARC for advice on what to do next. Documenting and recording: Take photo and video footage of the state of the property when you move in and always make copies of contracts and correspondence (letters and emails) to landlords and agents. This way you have proof if there is a dispute later on. The inventory: This details furniture, fittings and items that are in the property- if anything is missing or broken when you move in, keep a record and tell the landlord as soon as possible. Communication with your landlord: Tell your landlord about any problems as soon as they arise via telephone, and put things in writing so you can keep a record. This way any disputes over unreasonable deposit deductions will be harder to deny. Utilities: Take meter readings from your water, gas and electric as soon as you move in and inform the supplier you are new occupants. Make sure you put the bills into everyone’s name. Council tax: Full time students are exempt from paying council tax. You will need to inform the council via a council tax exemption letter that can be obtained from the Student Centre or requested online via Evision. Insurance: It is always a good idea to get insurance for those expensive items. If you think you are covered by your parents’ policy, double check first. Main things to remember: Keep records including photographs, make photocopies of contracts and letters, and, for unresolved problems, contact the ARC.

...and out! Moving out isn’t just a question of packing up your stuff. There are some areas you need to cover if you want to get that deposit money back. Cleaning: Many students lose money because of the cleanliness of the house. Leave enough time for a deep clean, don’t neglect communal areas and take responsibility because you will be held accountable even if your own room is spotless. Utilities: Take meter readings for the gas, electric and water and inform your supplier you are moving out. Make copies of the final statements, and if your landlord requires proof all bills have been paid send them a copy. Rubbish: Refuse collectors will not remove large items such as furniture; you will have to dispose of these yourself. You can also take unwanted items to the charity shop! Landlords will charge for refuse removal if you don’t sort it out. New addresses: Let old housemates, the University, the bank and credit card companies know your new address. It is not the responsibility of the new tenants or your landlord to forward on mail. You can get mail redirected by contacting the post office. Take photos: Take photographs of damages or marks you are worried might cause a dispute. These are useful if there is an issue over returning deposits later. Contact the ARC if you have any major concerns. Returning the keys: All housemates must return keys on or before the last day of the tenancy. If you return them late your landlord may charge you or change the locks and deduct the cost from your deposit. Return of deposits: In general you should expect to receive your money within one month of moving out. Don’t be fooled - if your landlord has made unreasonable deductions or refuses to return your deposit contact the ARC immediately for advice. 01895 269169 /

Oh-oh-oh-oh-ohhhh, oh-oh-oh-ohhhh, oh-oh-oh, caught in a bad romance (please recycle) (x2).



Le Nurb - January 2012


RAG Week 2012 January 16-20

A Word From the RAG Chair RAG Week is finally here and what an exciting week it’s going to be! Our week highlights include the Naked Calendar Launch Party, RAG Charity Fair, 24-hour washing up throughout the whole campus, Brunel’s Got Talent finals, Professional Magician & Hypnotist act, Traffic Light Party and many more! See across for the full schedule of events. RAG stands for Raising and Giving. It’s simply about raising money through lots of fun activities and donating the proceeds to charity. By getting involved in RAG you can meet loads of new people, gain tons of valuable experience and raise money for some fantastic causes! RAG is for absolutely anyone and everyone - sign up online anytime You can also check us out via Facebook (search ‘UBS RAG’), Twitter (@ubsrag), or via BBM 27EA6D06. I’d just like to personally thank all of those people who’ve become involved in RAG this year (especially those who got naked for the calendar!) - without you it wouldn’t be half the success that it is so a massive thank you! Brett Halsey

RAG Charities 2011/12 Each year RAG raises money for a number of different charities and at the end of the year all the money raised is split equally between them. This year we are raising money for two international charities, two national charities and one local charity.

CHILDREACH INTERNATIONAL Childreach International are committed to forging partnerships with universities across the UK. We firmly believe that active participation in fundraising by enthusiastic and creative students, such as those at your institution, hold the key to unlocking a child’s potential through assisting the development of our overseas projects. ACTION AGAINST HUNGER ACF International is an international humanitarian organisation committed to saving the lives of malnourished children while providing communities with sustainable access to safe water and long-term solutions to hunger. We have 30 years of expertise in emergency situations of conflict, natural disaster and chronic food insecurity, and our work in over 40 countries benefits over 5 million people each year. Some examples of our work include our responses to the Haiti earthquake, those affected by the Afghanistan war, and the escalating crisis in East Africa. We have been working in many of our programme countries for several years, so we are often well positioned to respond quickly in times of crisis and scale-up existing programmes.

MAKE A WISH Make-A-Wish is a charity with a single purpose – we grant magical wishes to children and young people aged 3-17 fighting life-threatening illnesses. Whilst we can make no claims in terms of any recovery that the child may receive, the experience has a very positive benefit on the child’s and family’s mental outlook. We aim to create a day of happiness, magic, laughter and relief from the otherwise daily routine of appointments, treatments and illness. Above all, we create memories that can be held onto and shared for a lifetime.

BROADWAY Broadway is a London based homelessness charity. Every year we support, challenge and inspire over 4,000 people on their journey from street to home. We are not about handouts and we are not just about housing. We provide a full range of services to help people get accommodation, improve their physical and mental health, gain training and employment and live successful, independent lives. Broadway’s work is local to Brunel. We run outreach services at Heathrow airport; working with homeless people that are sleeping rough at the airport and linking them to the appropriate services. Last year we worked with 84 people sleeping rough at Heathrow.

BRITISH LUNG FOUNDATION We are the only charity in the UK working for everyone affected by lung disease. We focus our resources on providing support for people affected by lung disease. The British Lung Foundation works in a variety of ways, including funding worldclass research, campaigning to bring about positive change in lung health and improving treatment, care and support for people affected by lung disease. Ra-ra-ah-ah-ah, roma, roma-ma, Gaga, ooh la la, wanjurbaromaance (please recycle).

January 2012 - Le Nurb



Your RAG Week Timetable Monday 16

Wednesday 18

Thursday 19

Friday 20

Longest Line of Coins: Help make a coin line stretching the entire length of campus! (Concourse, All day)

RAG Charity Fair: Meet our charities, get freebies, and sign up for volunteering. (Atrium, 11am-3pm)

Charity Car Wash: Get your car washed for just £5! (Wilfred Brown Car Park, 8am-3pm)

Climb Across Campus: Hosted by BUMS. (IAC-Concourse, 1pm-2pm)

Balloon Launch: £1 to launch your balloon. Prize for the furthest traveller! (Concourse, 1pm)

Free Stuff! Get your free RAG MAGS and tickets to events this week! (Concourse, All day)

Free Stuff! Get your free RAG MAGS and tickets to events this week! (Concourse, All day)

History Society in Stocks: Soak lecturers, the head of the History Society, and Gary O’Brien! (Quad, 2-4pm)

Sock Wrestling: Hosted by BUMS. (Pump Room, Sports Centre, 3-5pm)

Cake Sale: Lots of yummy cakes for your delight. Come and support us! (Atrium, All day)

Fifa Tournament: £30 gift vouchers and a signed football t-shirt to be won! Sign up in Loco’s. (Atrium, Daily 11am-4pm)

Daytime events -

Evening events

Tuesday 17


Mixed Netball Tournament (Netball Hall, 1pm)

Isner/Mahut Match Wimbledon 2009 Remake: Future RAG Event Signups: Hosted by Tennis Club (Concourse, All day) (Tennis Courts, 9am-8.05pm)

Casino Night: Hosted by Poker Society. (Academy, 6-9pm)

Brunel Dance Charity Clothes Swap (Lecture Centre, 5-7pm)

Brunel’s Got Talent: Tickets £5 advance, £7 on the door. (Howell Theatre, 7.30pm prompt)

Ravi Mayar, Professional Magician: Tickets £4 advance, £6 on the door. (Academy, 7pm)

Naked Calendar Launch Party: Tickets £3 advance, £4 on the door. (Academy, Doors 10pm)

Politics Debate: Hosted by Brunel Labour Society. (Academy, 6-8pm)

Brunel’s Got Talent After Party: Free entry with wristband given at the show. (Academy, Doors 10pm)

RAG Traffic Light Party: £3 adv., £4 on the door. Wear red: taken, amber: unsure, green: single! (Academy, Doors 10pm)



Fun Air Gun Shoot: Hosted by Brunel Target Shooting Club. (Exercise Studio, Sports Centre, 9-10.30pm)







24-hour Athletic Relay (Atrium, Monday 9am-Tuesday 9am)

Take Me Out: £3 advance, £5 on the door. (Academy)

24-hour Washing Up Call up RAG any time and we’ll get your washing up taken care of for a small donation! See the posters in your kitchen for the phone and text numbers.

24-hour events

The Radio Brunel 168-hour Broadcast Seven days, non-stop!

The RAG Naked Calendar

RAG Week is Back! RAG Week 2012 is here, but what does that mean for you? Some awesome activities and nights of entertainment, that’s what it means! The RAG Naked Calendar Launch Party is one of the biggest nights of RAG Week! We will be counting down to the launch of the calendar in true Academy style, make sure you bring your BEACH CLOTHES & swim wear - yes Baywatch will be played!!! The Calendars will being going on sale at midnight for just £5 so make sure you’re there to be one of the first to get your hands on the real full colour, very naked calendars. On Tuesday you can find out more about the charities that we are supporting at the Charity Fair in the Atrium. This is a great opportunity to find out more about RAG and perhaps get some volunteering opportunities that are not only fun but look great on your CV. The Brunel’s Got Talent final is on Wednesday at 7.30pm at the Howell Building. We’ve got some amazing acts for you all. The auditions were a huge success and it was incredibly difficult to narrow it down to the final nine acts – showing that Brunel really does have talent! The show is sure to be amazing with a range of acts including a dance group, singers, and a spoken word artist, as well as some very special guests. The people of Radio Brunel are being incredibly amazing and are going to be live on the air for 168 hours! That’s right, during the whole of RAG Week you can listen in day or night to Radio Brunel. Many of the Clubs and Societies of Brunel have arranged some fantastic events all over campus. The RAG Team wants to send a big thank you out to them for all they do to support RAG throughout the year.

Coming Soon... Bungee jump on campus at Brunel: are you brave enough? Raise £75 and jump for free! Find out more and sign up online at I want your horror, I want your design. ‘Cause you’re a criminal as long as you’re mine (please recycle).


Le Nurb - January 2012


Don Shall

Urban Outfitters. They stock clothes, too.

A little fashion know-how for 2012 Emma I’Anson Welcome back, beautiful Brunelians! It’s 2012 and I feel that it’s going to be a fantastic year for all. Hopefully you’re all managing to keep to your New Year’s Resolutions; if not, shame on you! With the weather being pretty pants at the moment, I thought I’d try and lighten you all up by listing a few of many up-and-coming fashion looks of 2012. Now, with the student loan sitting cosy in your

bank, I’m sure you’ll be wanting to splurge re, but try and hold back and pick up a few statement pieces which you can work your wardrobe around – such as Aztec skirts (Topshop have a few of these coming in as well as the Aztec print continuing around many other high street shops such as River Island and New Look.) Leopard continues from 2011 into 2012 so you won’t need to be putting any of this anyway any time soon. Another

up-and-coming trend is florals, with the spring and summer trends soon to be appearing in many store. Sops such as Warehouse have designed some gorgeous looking floral trousers in smart and casual. Teamed with a basic vest and jacket, this look will be a pretty sweet statement piece when the rain stops. When having a browse in the Boxing Day sales, I noticed a fair few stores such as Urban Outfitters, New Look and Republic

Cheryl Cole’s shoe collection


with bobble jumpers. This looks cute fitted or baggy, so whatever your style, there are plenty out there to choose from. Speaking of Urban Outfitters, for all you fans out there, if you haven’t already seen, UO are opening a store in White City’s Westfield Shopping Centre in Spring 2012. I am pretty stoked for this, as I never can be bothered to brave the Oxford Circus streets and I dislike ordering clothes online.

Apart from fashion essentials, the beauty must-have at the moment seems to be red lipstick, which has been seen the catwalks and on several celebrities such as Jessie J, Ashley Greene and Nikki Reed. If you don’t have one, I’d recommend giving it a go at your local make up counters. The best red lipstick I have is the MAC cosmetics Russian Red £13.95 which is a beautiful, stand out, matte finish lipstick.

Emma I’Anson Cheryl Cole seems to be coming back with a bang in 2012. With a TV programme, Late Night with Cheryl on Channel 4, rumoured to be starting and her new blonde, bouffant hair now appearing everywhere again after being in hiding, she has now released her own shoe collection featured on The shoe collection, which features 12 different pairs at the moment ,is said to be a hit and with more being added to the collection in March for the new season, it seems that Cheryl has found something she may be a little bit better at than singing and TV. My favourite pair of her collection so far are the Ri Ri boots, which are a basic black boot with leopard around the ankle and toe. These retail for £119.95 – a little pricey for me, but I can always look. In her interview for Grazia in the December issue, she says ‘I absolutely love it. The whole idea was like a breath of fresh air, something totally different but still creative. I love learning, I love creating. There was nothing scary

about it. I thoroughly enjoyed the whole experience’. It’s nice to see Cheryl Cole enjoying something again and with her fashion sense seen as perfection to some stylists, it’s clear to see she will have a pretty good career in the fashion designer department. Before you can view Cheryl Cole’s collection on, you must take a mini quiz so the site can find out a little about you and your style. I enjoyed it and found out that on their website I am classed as ‘free,’ ‘unique,’ and ‘individual.’ You are then taken to a basic showroom to begin your online shopping browse, but it takes around 24 hours for them to compile your full showroom look. As soon as I entered my online showroom, I fell in love with a black and leopard print shopper that wasn’t that pricey. If you do decide to take a peek and find out your style and see your showroom, let me know on Facebook or my blog emmyloubs. It would be great to know your reactions to the products and Cheryl Cole’s shoes.

A shoe for every situation. I want your love. Love, love, love! I want your love (please recycle).

January 2012 - Le Nurb



Lady Gaga: how far is too far? Caroline Saramowicz Unless you’ve been living in a hole for the past three years, you’ll know that Lady Gaga has become one of the most talked-about celebrities in the world. From her bizarre stage antics to absurd wardrobe choices (yes, that dress really WAS made of meat), Gaga has spurred the media since the day she stepped foot onto planet MTV. Her controversial videos depicting upside-down crosses and the sexualisation of Jesus have resulted in many critics blasting her curious behaviour as attentionseeking and unoriginal, yet the 17 million Little Monsters following her Twitter confirm that Lady G has seriously affected modern music. And so the question stands; how far will Lady Gaga go before she falls off her Edge of Glory? On viewing early videos of Lady Gaga (then known as Stefani Germanotta) singing her lungs out with a single piano substituting her usual band of half naked dancers, there is absolutely no doubt about it: this girl is seriously talented. However, she’s also almost unrecognizable – the traditional plastered face is completely stripped back to a radiant and natural tone, and a head of wavy brown locks substitutes the famous bleach blonde wigs. It is clear that this girl would have absolutely no trouble walking into a label and snatching up a record deal faster than you could say “Gaga ooh la la”, and yet the contentious path seemed like a

better one to take. It is clear that Gaga is heavily inspired by Madonna - although the 80’s were a time of great experimentation (not just in music but in tragically dodgy haircuts and neon puffer jackets), Madonna was one of the first pop stars to severely push boundaries in her videos and appearances, with critics claiming she was supporting pre-marital sex and going against social norms. However, she still remains as one of music’s most popular female icons, and her shocking performances have gone down in music history, which leads to only one assumption: controversy sells. Despite the negative responses to videos such as “Judas” and “Alejandro,” they have over 100 million views each on YouTube, with “Bad Romance” bearing a gigantic 438 million views to date, making it the third most popular music video on YouTube. Surprisingly, Gaga’s newest video, “Marry The Night,” depicts a more raw and gritty aspect of Lady G, with it being the only video she has directed solely and has described as being largely autobiographical. It illustrates a battered Gaga clearly battling depression and portrays the days before the glamour and wealth. Some say it’s edgy and real, others self-pitying. Either way, Lady Gaga continues to be the Marmite of popular music – we either love her or loathe her, which leads to my conclusion: the world really has gone gaga over Gaga.


The world’s gone gaga for Gaga.

Film’s affair with music

Lewis Sluman There are many films out there that when you think of the film, you think of the associated music. I’m certain that a song closely associated with the film benefits hugely, and the other way around. Armageddon had Aerosmith, Dirty Dancing had ‘Time of My Life’ and ‘Eye of the Tiger’ belonged to Rocky. These songs would be nowhere near as popular without their respective films. The list really goes on, with each song reflecting your feelings for the film. How can you not feel happy singing Disney songs, for example the whole entire Toy Story soundtrack word-for-word? Other films have a lovely and memorable musical score to them without any words,

such as Star Wars, Indiana Jones, and for me more recently, Inception. These instrumentals provide great backing for films and rightly so have some awards shelved just for them. My point is that whilst watching I Love You, Man recently, I picked up on the band Rush. I’ve heard of them but never listened, as I’m not a classic rock kind of listener. Except it’s not classic rock, kind of like progressive rock, so slightly more interesting and unusual. I loved the film, but I also wanted to check out this song they played during it, and they played it again later when they attended a Rush concert. Anyway, I checked out the song ‘Tom Sawyer’ when I got in, and I loved it instantly. I downloaded


it from ITunes – yep, totally legal, I know it’s not cool. Now this song will be associated with it for me, forever. Which will bring a smile to my face every time and I’ll watch that film again. It’s a win-win situation for both parties when a film combines well with a great song. Surely most of the reasons why School of Rock did so well is because Jack Black loves rock music + lots of rock music = a great rock music film. In a time where money is tight and cuts are being made, perhaps one way that movies and music are trying to convince people to stick by them, is to combine them. Almost duel media. The film Superbad has a great soulful soundtrack for example, and for me that’s what I think of every time somebody mentions it to me. I’ve started to realise that some of my favourite TV shows have done the same; the guy who does the intro song for Monk, Randy Newman, did the voice for the whole Toy Story soundtrack. The theme tune for House is the Massive Attack song ‘Teardrop’ - simple but beautiful. Both of these shows happen to be two of my favourites, and when I hear either intro themes I get excited. Surely that is the whole point of the beginning credits to draw people in, which for me, these two shows certainly do. I really can’t wait to see what 2012’s films and music have in store for me; I’m waiting to have my mind blown. Soundtracks at the ready, people.

Five artists to look out for in 2012 Lewis Sluman Canterbury: Improved so much over a couple of years hard work, and you can still download their album ‘Thank You’ for free via their website. Powerful ambient rock, great live band too. Little Mix: X Factor winners will surely come out with a stormer, I’ve got a good feeling for them. They fill a definite gap in the market, and could be very popular. Kendrick Lamar: MTV had him down as one to watch for 2012, and since checking him out I’ve got to agree. No arguments there. Reminiscent of early Kanye West here. Skrillex: Exploding out of the back end of 2011, Skrillex is definitely going to make the big time I think. One of the most famous Dubstep artists from what I’ve seen, and he is definitely going to break into mainstream radio this year. Alabama Shakes: Sounds like pure music, old sound, great vocals. Wow band, subtle and relaxing. Still managing a punch, definitely perfect for those essay filled nights and another of MTV’s shortlist for 2012 - they are dead right!

Rush: rocking the stage. I want your psycho, your vertical stick. Want you in my rear window, baby you’re sick (please recycle).

WRITE FOR US! Send us your arts article or review:

Le Nurb accepts submissions from any Brunel student. Full details on page 2.


Le Nurb - January 2012


Richard II REVIEW Veronica Grubb I dearly hope the Donmar Warehouse continues to sparkle without Michael Grandage, since this is his last show with them as the artistic director – and does he go out in a pomp of glory. I have given a standing ovation only three times in my life, and this was my fourth. Grandage achieves that which is exquisite in theatre; he not only engages audience empathy (in a Shakespeare history of all things that could be distant subjects to the audience) but stimulates them too. I cannot bear when the audience is patronised, which could easily have been done to explain this lesser performed play of Shakespeare’s work, but he lets the script stand alone, and refreshingly, avoids updating it. Upcoming star Eddie Redmayne – I expected he might be too young for this role, but I could not have been more wrong. Redmayne bestows a grandiose King with humanity and sings the poetry of Shakespeare. But this success could only be really achieved in the Donmar, where you’re close enough to see the vulnerability in his eyes. I have never been much of a fan of the histories, as they’re a world so far apart from us – more like watching a film through the transparent box

Johan Persson

‘Does my head look big in this?’

of the television. Yet the purity of Redmayne’s characterisation is entrancing. Similarly, his antithesis Henry Bolingbroke (Andrew Buchan) is no storybook villain; his acting so subtle it has a meditative quality bubbling under the surface. Together they bring a tired formula to life: a subject seeks revenge on a flawed king; which was not only essential to my sensibility, but simply understanding of a complex play I hadn’t read before. Pulling off a performance all its own, the combination of Cork’s sound and Kent’s design is tremendously atmospheric and yet minimalist. You walk into a space more like a church than a theatre, coated in ageing gold; symbols of depleting power and tradition – the metaphors concealed by Grandage are endlessly fascinating. VERDICT


This production transports the audience not only into the production, but also into the hearts and minds of the characters. Richard II is a play about the flawed nature of humanity, in a historical, courtly setting, which is flawlessly executed.

Crazy For You Veronica Grubb It’s definitely been a while since something like this has been done: a pure, no-frills classic. Crazy For You is so familiar, yet more refreshing than most shows on at the moment in this respect that there’s been no nasty tampering. It’s as if I’ve stepped back into good old Gershwin’s day – and I wasn’t even there. You forget that timeless tunes like ‘Embraceable You’ and ‘I Got Rhythm’ all stepped out of the same man’s head, and can’t help but bow to him. Crazy For You is packed with showgirls and smiles; you’d have felt short-changed were you to leave without a flash of jazz hands and they were most certainly shaking the show into life in the first five minutes. It’s so rare to see a dance break, to the poetic lengths of those seen in the MGM musicals, and yet Stephen Mear’s choreography is constantly vibrant; it reminds you of the escapist essence of musicals and their innocent ability to simply make you smile at those moments in life that make you break into song and dance. Although the simplicity of the production means the technical features are more decorative than anything, the filmic contrast of Peter McKintosh’s set brilliantly outlines that division between musical and reality, conjuring an earthly background for big dreams. In the midst of the glamorous ensemble, an almost immaculately compelling unit and full of

character as individuals, something sits slightly off with our ‘Fred Astaire’ and ‘Ginger Rogers’. Like a pair meant to be, Sean Palmer (Bobby Childs) might benefit from Claire Foster’s (Polly Baker) sharpness, and viceversa, Claire from her partner’s broad voice. In a show of squeaky showgirls, Claire’s southern accent is too coarse, her transition from delicate head into money notes left wanting. Despite this, these are the subtlest issues in an allround triple threat cast, which is undeniably a momentous skill. Palmer has been blessed with the cloned genes of John Barrowman and communicates the starry eyes enamour for Broadway with the charm of a tap-dancing Cheshire cat. It should be mentioned that to stand out in a chorus this clean and frankly exhausting is something special; and Richard Jones (at least I believe this is his name, I struggled to match the face to a headshot) is most certainly that. A cheeky face in the sea of legs and teeth, that sold the innumerable dance sequences with that little bit more sparkle. Speaking of bad jokes, yes I was just ‘crazy’ for the show. It’s full of tasteful smiles and slapstick of a bygone age; almost like recovering a little gem of a family heirloom left in the attic. ‘What Causes That?’, the duet between Palmer and David Burt (Bela Zangler) is a drunken homage to the comedy of manners device of mistaken

Tristram Kenton identity. Bobby Childs has dressed up as the music hall producer Bela Zangler in order to convince Polly that he’s not bent on repossessing her theatre but saving it. So of course when the Bela turns up (both ‘Bela’s’ drunk at this time) and meets himself, laughter ensues: “I am beside myself” - as they say to one another with laughter. If you’re not a Gershwin fan, or prefer les musicales miserable, you should at least go for the showgirls. You’ll have stars in your eyes.

I want your love. Love, love, love! I want your love (please recycle).

Tristram Kenton Showgirls, smiles and one lucky guy in a suit.

January 2012 - Le Nurb



Pizza box laptop:


invoked computing brings everyday objects to life

Computing: it’s all gone bananas. No? Never mind.

Matt Smith A University of Tokyo assistant professor and his partner have developed the technology to turn everyday objects into fully functional gadgets. Alvaro Cassinelli and Alexis Zerroug’s invoked computing system can transform bananas into phones and pizza boxes into video players. Speaking to The Guardian, Cassinelli said: “Maybe writing on a typewriter is more efficient than using an iPad. “Invoked computing gives you the opportunity to use what you know best and continue to use it, even if it doesn’t work any more.” A camera tracks objects, and a projector follows them, meaning that video can be shown on any

suitable surface in a room. Parametric speakers emit an ultrasound beam that becomes audible when it hits an object – so the caller’s voice actually comes from the banana phone. It is also possible for users to interact with objects, adjusting volume levels with a swipe of their fingers and moving around the room while using them. Invoked computing is a glimpse of what the future of augmented reality could have in store, and Cassinelli says it is ‘feasible’ as a commercial product. So before long, we could be answering calls with bananas, watching TV on pizza boxes, and reading restaurant menus on our napkins.

Budget housing hitting the art galleries Chrissie Gomez With the next installment of your student loan sitting snug in your account, waiting to be spent, you’ll be relieved that you didn’t come close to living in “boxed conditions” over the Christmas period. Well, now you don’t really have to imagine that. Artist Luise Valdes presents his latest installment of making life-size rooms using nothing but cardboard boxes as building material. Calling his artwork ‘Casa de Karton’ or Cardboard House, Valdes cleverly uses boxes as a surface, securing it with cardboard tape and finishing it off with whitewash paint and permanent marker. In describing it, it sounds like a

fancy place for a hobo to live in. But after showcasing his work on designboom, the responses he got were favorable. Spectators could not quite believe the surrealism coming from this form of paper art, which is particularly shown by the careful outlining on the edges of the furniture and on the walls using permanent marker to achieve that pop-out look for the viewers to distinguish the furniture from the walls. If you’re familiar with rotoscope-animated films like Waking Life or A Scanner Darkly, then you can compare the surreal effects Valdes’ work has upon the eye.The greatest part of it all is he includes even the smallest daily objects such as toilet paper, plates and a pair of

trainers sprawled on the floor. Unfortunately, this apartment is not available in the market and would only be showcased for your viewing pleasure (well, the bed doesn’t appear to be comfortable to sleep on). However, simply

imagining yourself living in this place makes you realise you wouldn’t survive a day in those conditions. Maybe we are lucky in that we live in student halls after all, whilst eating a tin of Green Giant sweet corn for dinner - at

least you know for a fact that the electric and heating bills in a cardboard house won’t be as drastic as they are going to be this year. As I always say with a hint of irony; “Happy New Year!”

Luise Valdes Luise Valdes

Typical student houses. You know that I want you, and you know that I need you. I want your bad, your bad romance (please recycle).


Le Nurb - January 2012


One of the longest-running bromances in history.

Sherlock Holmes: why has brainy become the new sexy? Veronica Grubb This Christmas season, you may also have seen the seasonal Sherlock invasion: Guy Ritchie’s Sherlock Holmes: A Game of Shadows and the BBC’s Sherlock. Being the season of repeats, you may also have sat through running commentaries from the relatives about how Jeremy Brett or somebody else was the definitive Sherlock Holmes, and it was all so much more authentic twenty years ago when we didn’t want to shoot the same thing twenty times, from twenty different angles, with twenty different state of the art cameras. Of course, the battle for supreme Sherlock is a somewhat futile discussion; it’s a matter of taste, but what is interesting is the evolution of our taste. Where once a pure adaptation was enough, both the film and BBC versions feel the necessity to update this classic. There is obviously a demand for Sherlock Holmes, since – if the response is any

evidence – brainy is the new sexy. But what is it about Sir Arthur Conan Doyle’s original hero that our generation finds lacking? The BBC’s Sherlock is yet another success for writer Steven Moffat (Doctor Who, Jekyll, The Adventures of Tintin), and succeeds above and beyond the slick production with the power of wit. They do say women prefer a man that makes them laugh, and it’s just the cherry on top, that cold Benedict Cumberbatch is the last man you’d expect to, as funny is never funny if you’re trying to be. His naturally ethereal features make him the contemporary Sherlock Holmes - elevating him from a stringy public school boy to an otherworldly genius. Martin Freeman, of course, plays Watson as Martin Freeman: the actor’s ‘everyman.’ But Lara Pulver’s Irene Adler most definitely trumps Rachel McAdams as “the woman” for Holmes, which brings us to the other element which distinguishes

these productions from past ones: the increased demand for sex as it has moved from the private to the public sphere within the media. The BBC received complaints for showing sexy scenes before the watershed, but the show would have been nowhere near as good without Sherlock being stripped bare, finding his weakness in a woman (almost) as intuitive as him. His relationship with the dominatrix acts as the perfect metaphor for Sherlock’s fear of losing his God complex: Holmes will “outlive God trying to have the last word.” On the other hand, Guy Ritchie’s film isn’t shy about the Holmes/ Watson bromance, which borders shamelessly on camp: so much so, that a cross-dressing Holmes throwing Watson’s fiancée from a moving train, and ending in a somewhat erotic wrestle with Holmes’ legs wrapped around Watson’s face is the source of most of the laughs. Ritche’s romp is written as a fun, commercial

Cedar Rapids REVIEW Nick Birss Cedar Rapids is one of those forgotten gems lost in between all the other great releases of 2011. It shows Ed Helms (The Hangover, The Office) playing a wonderfully heartfelt character – somewhat of a transition from his usual movie appearances. The plot sees naïve small-town insurance salesman Tim Lippe

(Ed Helms) sent to represent his employer at an annual insurance awards ceremony. Lippe battle through the sordid underbelly of the Midwestern town of Cedar Rapids, battling temptation to bring home the big prize. I’m not going to spoil it for you but it continues on to follow a standard theme of the protagonist finding unlikely friends, who after making

him see the truth he was blinded from, go on to help him to do the right thing and then roll on the reunion montage. Some impressive names feature as supporting actors; Sigourney Weaver playing Lippe’s old school teacher and now romantic fling, while John C. Reilly and Isah Whitlock Jr. play Lippe’s new found insurance

film for Christmas, whereas Moffat still captures the essence of Holmes, but propels him into the 21st Century. In contrast, past adaptations have definitely had a sense of celibacy in Holmes. It would seem brainy couldn’t be the new sexy without some sex. However finding common ground, both McGuigan and Ritchie both project the meandering of Holmes’ extraordinary brain through internal monologues frozen in time, the only difference being the presentation of onscreen text and vocalised observations. Apparently these deductive powers also mean that Holmes can determine how someone is going to beat him up and so retaliate to get the better of him. Is this actually possible? Or simply a method of balancing Sherlock’s brain with brawn in a series of slow motion fight sequences which both adaptations champion? Bowing to the widest viewer appeal possible triumphs over a pure adaptation in this

sense then. Yet, you could also argue that without the filmic elements that we’ve come to expect with all our technological toys, less people would be watching, and thereby finding brainy to be the new sexy. Cumberbatch has, after all, become an unlikely sex symbol with Sherlock. Films are still a very different media and know that sex sells: therefore we have a wonderfully eccentric – but always sporting a Hollywood tan – Robert Downey Jr. So it would seem the classic Sherlock Holmes has been forced to find his sex appeal through the magic of media – not that it’s a bad thing for interpretations of a work done to death should evolve. Rather, I believe both to be refreshingly exciting and that the BBC’s Sherlock especially showcases all that is brilliant about contemporary drama. I do wonder what Mr. Doyle would think about Sherlock Holmes sexting, though.

broker buddies. Director Miguel Arteta carefully works in the supporting actors through the first half, establishing good characters and relationships but this leaves the first half somewhat lacking in comedy. There some elements that seem a bit farfetched – one being that Lippe is a virtual aphrodisiac for any woman near him despite his fumbling, humourless naivety. In my opinion it adds to the endearment of his character. There are some real laughs to be

had with this movie and enough depth to appreciate the unusual lack of comedy from Ed Hemls.

(Chorus, lots of ra-ra’s and wanjurbaromaances, then a bridge. In the meantime, please recycle.)



Simply because this is a Hollywood heartfelt comedy I can’t give the movie a higher score. It becomes apparent in some scenes that the Americans just have a higher threshold for cheesy awkward moments - when instead I just found myself cringing ever so slightly.

January 2012 - Le Nurb




Sudoku Difficulty: 55555

Difficulty: 55555



5 6



























2 8


5 7






8 7




4 6


S M T 4





2 1


Difficulty: 55555 Find as many words as possible using letters from the grid. The words must be four letters or more, and contain the central letter, but each letter may not be used more than once. There is at least one word that uses all nine letters in the grid.





6 3




1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Numberdrums






4 Ratings: 10-15 average

16-20 good

21-25 excellent

Difficulty: 55555

Use all the numbers in the outer ring to make the target number. You can add, subtract, multiply or divide them - and use brackets - to reach your solution.






20 11

80 6





3 7









50 11

7 10


54 27

2 3

2012-13 Well, someone’s got to do it. More info soon...

I want your love and I want your revenge. I want your love; I don’t wanna be friends (please recycle).

26 godlike

Le Nurb - January 2012

copes take the form of


Tall Maze of Awesome

is month’s horos Due to a filing error, th s. Victorian folksy saying - BEN MOXEY.


A whistling girl and a crowing hen always come to some bad end.

ARIES (March 21-April 20)

le start

TAURUS (April 21-May 21)

All this suffragette nonsense will only end in tears.

GEMINI (May 22-June 21)

This might be a good time to refer to your roommate as “Watson” and say things like “The game’s afoot!” Eventually, you’ll be able to reconstruct an entire evening’s events from a spilled drop of raspberry vinaigrette.

CANCER (June 22-July 22)

Monkey see, monkey do. Thankfully we aren’t related to monkeys... wait, what was that, Darwin? We are?! Oh, God bless it to Birmingham! Hold still, I’m going to fling my poop. Hakuna matata.

LEO (July 23-August 22)

The sun never sets on the British Empire. So get that flag down sharpish, it’s getting dusky.

VIRGO (August 23-September 21) LIBRA (September 22-October 22)

Anyone who hasn’t got a little bit of a temper is not worth killing.

SCORPIO (October 23-November 21)

Fool me once, shame on me. Fool me with a threshing machine, maim me a lot.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21)

One’s agitated milk-based drink summons all of the young fellows to the veranda. They insist it is better than others. I swear by God that they are correct and tell them I’d love to educate them in how to do likewise but that I would have to ask for a fee.

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 20)

Mind your protons and quarks (this was later shortened to “p’s and q’s” for brevity and because neither had been discovered yet).

AQUARIUS (January 21-February 19)

Being pregnant is an occupational hazard of being a wife (actual quote from the big Q-dog Victoria herself).

PISCES (February 20-March 20)

Has one been injured in cart snafu that was not of one’s own making? Then telegram “Injury Lawyers 4 1” post-haste and we will endeavour to seek the payment that one deserves.

Solutions 3. (84 - 11 - 10) x (50 x 2) / 7 = 900. 2. (80 + 25 + 16 - 8) x (7 - 3) = 452. 1. (95 x 7) + (20 x 5) + 6 - 11 = 760.

Due next month in issue 6 (if we’re feeling generous).

Beginner Sudoku

4 7 6 5 1 8 2 3 9

1 3 2 7 4 9 6 8 5

9 5 8 3 2 6 4 7 1

7 4 9 1 6 5 3 2 8

3 2 5 8 7 4 9 1 6

8 6 1 9 3 2 7 5 4

5 8 3 4 9 7 1 6 2

2 1 4 6 8 3 5 9 7

6 9 7 2 5 1 8 4 3

motivate, motivates, motive, motives, move, moves, movie, movies, save, soviet, stave, stove, vase, vast, vats, vest, veto, vets, vies, visa, vise, vista, vomit, vomits, vote, votes.

Hard Sudoku

5 9 7 3 6 4 1 8 2

6 4 1 2 8 9 5 7 3

2 8 3 5 7 1 4 6 9

9 7 4 8 1 6 2 3 5

1 5 8 9 3 2 6 4 7

26 godlike 21-25 excellent 16-20 good 10-15 average Ratings:

3 2 6 4 5 7 8 9 1

7 3 2 1 4 8 9 5 6

4 6 9 7 2 5 3 1 8

8 1 5 6 9 3 7 2 4 le end

Still no lol/fail section. Yeah, we should really stop promising its return every issue... J’ai ton amour et je veux ta revanche. J’ai ton amour, I don’t wanna be friends (please recycle)!

Tall Maze of Awesome



4. (69 - 54) x (27 / 3) + 2 + 1 = 138.


January 2012 - Le Nurb


Last term the society had a range of different speakers on their behalf delivering talks teaching , examples of these was Coca Cola – Become an Ultimate sales person. Coca Cola delivered a talk on teaching the tips and trick to enhance your key skills to sales, a job opportunity was also given at the event for members to hand in their CV’s. A 1st Class Graduate Nathan Ghann gave an inspirational talk on “How on Earth to Get a 1st”, the event was phenomenal with a full house of attendees along with positive feedback from members. This semester we have a range of events for our members to look forward to such as; members only socials designed to improve specific skills to ensure your employability in the job market, interactive workshops from high prolific companies, networking opportunities, competitions and a tech event with a keynote speaker from The Apprentice. To keep up with up to date information find us on Twitter: @BrunelEntrepren Facebook - Brunel Entrepreneurs

13-17th February! A week of academic skills workshops A variety of ASK Workshops are taking place this term Timetables will be available on the ASK website soon see: to view what’s on and book your place.



at Brunel 6th -10 February 2012. A whole week of events, activities and information aimed to improve awareness of what employability means and more importantly, what you need to do to develop it!

Including… ~ Launch of Student Employee of the Year Awards - Celebrating the outstanding contributions to organisations that students working part-time can offer. ~ Successful graduates – how to beat the competition and secure that grad job - A panel of leading recruiters and Brunel alumni share their experiences and answer your questions about how to become successful graduates, their advice and top tips for navigating the recruitment process. ~ How on earth do I get a placement? – Brunel students currently on placement share their experiences of the recruitment process and the opportunities their placements have opened up for them, as well as the skills they have developed.

More Information available at:

Google : Brunel Super U I don’t wanna be friends! (x2) Wanjurbaromaance! Caught in a bad romance, wanjurbaromaance (please recycle)!


Le Nurb - January 2012


Nick Chapman Nick Chapman’s Fight Science Gym opened it’s doors in December 2011 to Britain’s hottest young talent

An MMA tidal wave

Catherine Lux For the past seven years, Guildfordbased professional Mixed Martial Arts fighter and UK1 British LightHeavyweight Champion Nick ‘Headhunter’ Chapman has been attempting to do what seemed impossible: to create and own his own Mixed Martial Arts, and Strength and Conditioning facility called Fight Science Gym. After exploding onto the UK MMA scene in 2010, winning his debut fight

in just 32 seconds by KO, Nick’s dream has finally become a reality with the backing of his good friends Alex ‘Reidinator’ Reid and Terry Hollands. On 17th December 2011, Fight Science Gym opened its doors to Britain’s hottest young talents in the MMA industry, including young England Judo Squad star and Olympic hopeful Joey Fowler. But you don’t have to be a professional to join; anyone can sign-up and use the facilities, from women wanting

to hit the gym to shift a few extra pounds, to professional athletes, and of course Mixed Martial Artists. The gym is only forty-five minutes down the road from Brunel and is perfect for those MMA enthusiasts amongst us. There will be a range of classes on offer for all ages and abilities - from beginners to professionals, including; MMA, Kick-Boxing, Muay Thai, Wrestling, Boxing, Karate, Jiu-Jitsu and much more.

The gym includes a professional £11,000 training cage, a fully matted area, state of the art strength and cardiac training equipment provided by Life Fitness and Hammer Strength, and a shop stocking Feel Free Nutrition products. In the span of just one week, builders, painters and equipment installation experts transformed the old Army Maida Gymnasium in Aldershot, Surrey, into what is expected to become

the biggest MMA training centre in the country, if not Europe. So do what you know is right – go to the official Facebook page (, like the page, and then sign up for membership! Straight from the Headhunter himself – ‘‘Get ready for WAR...It’s an MMA tidal wave that cannot be stopped, get on board with Fight Science or you might just drown.”

Brunel Sport Mixed Hockey heroics achieves Quest accreditation Ollie de Kretser Brunel’s sports facilities have achieved the Quest award under a recently relaunched assessment programme. The University attained a ‘Good’ rating after being the first to undertake a new assessment procedure, which included undercover visits, phone calls and a two-day assessment, Quest is the industry-recognised quality management award for Sports Centres and Sports Development organisations in the UK. The assessment took into account the University’s indoor and outdoor sports facilities, as well as its sports development work. This included the new Active Brunel programme for student participation and the

radically reshaped Performance Programmes for elite athletes across a range of sports. Duty Manager Ed Walker was overjoyed with Brunel’s final rating: “We scored either ‘Excellent’ or ‘Good’ in all the categories, giving an overall score of ‘Good’,” he said. The rating process also assessed health and safety, business planning, customer experience and specific sports provisions. Deputy Director for Sports Facilities Sally Preece said: “This result is a credit to the whole team and would not have been possible without the input of all our staff. Our customers can rest assured that, when they visit the University’s sports facilities, they will receive high quality service from staff who are committed to continuous improvement.”


Send us your sport article:

Le Nurb accepts submissions from any Brunel student. Full details on page 2.

Paul Edward Round 2011 saw something I feared would not happen in my time at Brunel. After three years of trying, the mixed hockey team finally managed to beat Portsmouth in the final of the SESSA cup to become champions. This all happened back in April and has served as a serious motivation for our team. However, after the success of last year’s team, it was always going to be difficult for us to emulate their form, especially after a few regular players departed at the end of last year. Not all was lost, and the confidence gained from our 17:2 victory over Writtle College in our first game was hopefully going to be a good omen for the season to come. After only narrowly beating Middlesex, and then losing to Greenwich, it was fair to say that our season had been brought back down to earth with a bump. Also, due to numerous games being postponed, it was a very stop and start term in regards to our fixtures. At the halfway point of the season, we are currently in fourth place in the league, but this does not do us justice. As a team we have 4 games in hand over head of the table Portsmouth, and with there being only 5 points in it, we

are set to reclaim our position at the top of the table. All the best to the mixed team

in 2012; lets try to make it two cup wins in as many years!

Ginny Batty

Brunel’s Mixed Hockey team finally conquers Portsmouth (More choruses and wanjurbaromaances. Nearly there, honest. Recycling’s great, by the way.)

January 2012 - Le Nurb





WHAT IS SPORTSVEST? t t t t t t t t t t t t t t t




INFO@SPORTSVEST 0845 331 30 40



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Y1415 / L5645



2 queries:

15/09/2011 16:00

Ra-ra-ah-ah-ah, roma, roma-ma, Gaga, ooh la la, wanjurbaromaance (please recycle).



Le Nurb - January 2012


SPORT This month... MMA

Join the champion at Fight Science

TOUR! TOUR! TOUR! Amy Blackford As many of you will already know, Brunel will be hitting Croatia on 31st March this year for the annual sports tour. Tour is open to Brunel

Students who currently have a Sports Federation membership, and it is recommended that they are affiliated with a Sports Club. As it is a Sports Tour, fixtures are organised with other Universities and

local sides for your team to get involved in. Partnering Sportsvest for a second year in a row, 360 Brunelians have already signed up. All tourgoers must remember to

Jo Barnard

22 QUEST AWARD A credit to Brunel Sport



For more information, or if you have any questions contact your tour rep or Emma Beal at emma.

MIXED HOCKEY On their way to the top

have fully paid by 20th January. Those needing visas remember to check before you travel. The Sports on offer are: Basketball, Football, Soccer 6’s, Rugby 7’s, Rugby League, Netball, Volleyball, Hockey, Cheerleading, Flag Football, Lacrosse, Futsal, Waterpolo, Beach Cricket, Tennis, Squash, Ultimate Frisbee, Horse Riding, and Dance. Students will be based in the town of Rovinj on the peninsula of Istria in self-catered apartments, right by the beach. Last year 304 Brunel students went to Lloret de Mar, and it is fair to say made a long-lasting impression on the locals. The main strip was filled with countless Where’s Wallies, cavegirls, Bruwatch and other familiar favourites.

Brunelians took over the beach after a hard night out at Lloret de Mar last Easter

So far so good for Squash season 22 TOUR!

Hit Croatia hard with Brunel

24 SQUASH The first half


Dominic Trewin Following on from the success of the Men’s 1sts achieving promotion last year in division 2A, the fortune has continued into the 2011 season with a copious amount of quality squash players entering the scene. Freshers and highly-improved returners to the club have substantially strengthened its quality, making it difficult to decide who should play in what team. The 1sts have started the season comfortably, placing themselves in 3rd position just below UCL 1st‘s and Reading 1sts. With a recently close return leg defeat (3-2) to current leaders UCL 1st (previously 5-0), it shows that the determination and hard work put in by the team and coach James Hyatt has started to pay dividends. The men’s 2nds looks in strong form as well, with Freshers Dan Binnie and Dan Henderson displaying a excellent run of results. The 2nds are currently undefeated and will stand a strong chance of promotion if they beat previously relegated Hertfordshire 1sts. Finally, our 3rd team have had a mixed first half of the season with a series of wins and defeats. Their lack of competitive experience has not hindered their determination, and I feel confident of a strong

James Hyatt

The teams celebrate an excellent beginning to the season at the annual fancy dress tournament! response in the return legs. As captain, I am delighted to see the standard of the club going from strength to strength with no sign of letting up. The Christmas break has given players time to rest those tired Please recycle.

legs before a busy opening to the New Year with the Individual Championships taking place in Birmingham, and The Roehampton Club Cup in which the Brunel will look to improve on last year’s welldeserved third place,

FIND OUT MORE Visit our minisite via, or join the Facebook group: just search Brunel Squash 2011-12.

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