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October 2011 Issue 2

October 2011 - Le Nurb


Students set to strike again

Brunel struck by Olympic fever



Brunel’s take on tuition fees


Big Bang Theory? I’m a creationist

Union of Brunel Students


Local schools visit campus to see the Olympic bus. Tom Scott Brunel was struck by Olympic fever this month when the official Coca Cola NUS 2012 Olympic Torch Tour Bus arrived on campus. The bus is currently on a country-wide tour of UK student unions and Brunel had the honour of being the first university selected to participate. Parked in the very centre of campus, the bus managed to get the thousands of students passing by excited at the prospect of being a part of the 2012 Olympic Games, with the official Olympic torch being present for students to hold. Hundreds of students queued

for a chance to get their photo taken with the official Olympic torch and with plenty of free Coca Cola to give away, there was no shortage of interest. The event was organised by the Vice-President Student Activities (VPSA), Gary O’Brien, who said that he already had sights on the unofficial prize for ‘campaign of the year.’ The VPSA had also managed to get local schools involved in the campaign, with over half a dozen taking a trip to campus to see the bus and get involved. The campaign was also seen as a success by Coca Cola, who were also attempting to promote the cultural aspects of the Olympic


games, as well as the sport. Nicky Lindsay, the events manager for the Coca Cola Bus, said: “The day has gone really well with so many students showing an interest, not only in the Olympics, but in other aspects of 2012.” The bus was keen to promote the cultural aspects that 2012 will bring to the UK, including art, music and entertainment. The bus was also on the lookout for nominations for official torch bearers, not only for people who are interested in sport, but for those who are interested in the various types of culture. Over 1000 students managed to get their photo taken with

the torch, with dozens of torch bearer nomination forms being submitted. But the bus was not without its controversies, as many complained about the noise and commotion the bus had brought to campus. The bus was parked directly outside the Law Library in the Bannerman Centre and many Law students were complaining that these noise levels made working incredibly difficult. Brunel is already having a big impact on the 2012 Olympics, as the campus will be home to the Chinese, South Korean and Canadian Paralympic teams.


News from Brunel Basketball


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Le Nurb - October 2011



This Month... 03

Amy Blackford - Editor Here we are! Issue 2 is here and, wow, has time flown, to use that old cliché. Since the last issue, all the new freshers have hopefully settled in, Bloc Party have partied hard, the Coca Cola Olympic bus has landed on campus, and we are left with autumn elections. If you’re someone who has something to say about the Student Union or just want to get involved, then this is a great opportunity. I had a few friends run last year and know that they fully enjoyed their time in their respective positions. It is often the case that members running for student assembly take up officer or chair positions at the end of the year. Good luck to all candidates. We had more than 140 people sign up at our Freshers’ Fayre table this year, which was absolutely incredible. I think that the main opinion of the new intake has been very positive and everyone seems keen to get involved. One thing to remember, however, is that unlike most societies, you don’t have to “sign up” for Le Nurb at the beginning of the year to write; you can contribute whenever you want. All you have to do is drop me an email if you want to be involved but are not sure in what section, or go ahead and contact the section editors themselves. They are always looking for contributors. For next issue, we will be hosting a “society showcase.” I will be emailing around very shortly to all society chairs, giving them an opportunity to talk about what they do, and importantly, get some exposure and possibly some new members. Also coming up is the big Brunel Sky Dive (see page 7). It’s for an amazing cause and I really encourage as many of you as possible to donate as much as you can. Like Tesco’s say, every little helps. Finally, a big thank you goes to all the contributors this issue. We have had some fantastic articles sent in, so keep them coming!

Issue 3 out November 15

The Team 17


Brunel and the wider world.

ARTS & REVIEWS Games! Film! Theatre! More!














Please mind the gap.

Is university worth it?

All the candidates for the autumn elections.

This month’s question: what’s your Hallowe’en costume going to be?

They have a swoosh in their logo.

Tom still can’t do the Crosslogic.

Editor Amy ‘Harry Potter’ Blackford Deputy Editor Ben ‘Quailman’ Moxey Chief Designer Robert ‘Katie Price’ Hunt Chief Sub-Editor Katrina ‘Pac-Man’ Muhly Media Chair Tom ‘The Tango Man’ Scott

New this month: hanging BUMS. NEWS

Submissions Simply put, if you’re a current Brunel student, you can write for Le Nurb. There’s a few things to bear in mind: YOUR ARTICLE

- Your article should be saved as a Word document (.doc or .docx) or a PDF. - Its filename should contain your name, student number, and a suggested headline. - We don’t accept Works (.wps), OpenOffice (.odt), Pages (.pages) or other formats. - Publisher files (.pub) are particularly horrific, beastly things. Please don’t send any, ever, or Rob will cry. - It may sound obvious, but please run a spellcheck before you submit your article! YOUR IMAGES

- To suggest specific images for your article, save them as .jpg or .png files and attach them separately. - If you’re submitting a Features article, we also need a headshot of you for use in the byline. - Don’t embed your images into the article document - this compresses them too much for use on the page. - Any image filenames and image credits (who the photographer is) should be listed at the end of your article. - Images you submit must not be copyrighted by another individual or organisation. - Please don’t just nick pictures off Google Image Search; we can’t use them 99% of the time! YOUR CONTACTS

Enquiries, advertising & complaints News articles In-depth articles on a given topic Reviews and arts articles Everything sport-related

Amy - Bess - Emma - Nick - Alex & Adil -

More from Le Nurb http://

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For more Le Nurb information, including a back issue archive and full submission guidelines, take a look at our updated minisite

Terms & Legal All articles and pictures © their respective authors unless otherwise indicated. Views expressed are those of the writers and do not reflect the official position of UBS or Brunel University. All comments and complaints about content in Le Nurb should be addressed to the Editor in the first instance: Complaints will only be entertained where it can be proven that an article or graphic is: factually inaccurate; breaches the Press Complaints Commission’s Editors’ Code of Practice; breaches the National Union of Journalists’ Code of Conduct; breaks the law; or encourages readers to break the law. No complaint that fails to satisfy at least one of these criteria will be upheld. Published by: Union of Brunel Students, Kingston Lane, Uxbridge, UB8 3PH. Printed by: Harmsworth Printing Derby, Northcliffe House, Meadow Road, Derby, DE1 2BH.

Friday! Friday! Gotta recycle on Friday!

FEATURES Features Editor Emma ‘Narwhal’ Butcher Sub Editor Sharna Lee ‘Gaddafi’ Heir Designer Rosie ‘Corpse Bride’ Hayes Staff Writers Hayley ‘Pirate’ Baldwin Devina ‘Princess Jasmine’ Sanghani Alec ‘Slutty Witch’ Beeson Rhys ‘Crackhead’ Morgan-Jones Charlotte ‘Boy George’ Bale


DEADLINES FOR ISSUE 3 The closing date for articles for the next issue is Friday, November 4. The closing date for advertising for the next issue is Friday, November 4.


News Editor Bess ‘Evil Bumble Bee’ Browning Sub Editor Adam ‘Donnie Darko’ Martley Designer Enya ‘Scott Pilgrim’ Williams

Arts & Reviews Editor Nick ‘The Little Mermaid’ Birss Sub Editor Jon ‘Slutty Pumpkin’ Partridge Designer Pelin Gunay Staff Writers Emma ‘Wonder Woman’ I’Anson Subat ‘Morticia Addams’ Bashir Christel ‘Ninja Assassin’ Gomez Ricky ‘Wario’ Compton Lewis ‘Dead Mickey Mouse’ Sluman Matt ‘Ron Burgundy’ Smith Daisy ‘Zombie Nerd’ Adamson

SPORT Sport Editors Alex ‘Freddy Krueger’ Mitchell Adil ‘Osama’s Ghost’ Khan Deshmukh Sub Editor Ollie ‘Zzzombieee’ de Kretser Designer AJ ‘Dappy from N-Dubz’ Nair

October 2011 - Le Nurb


Empty promises? Bess Browning Important potential university policies have been revealed in the last few weeks as the Labour and Conservative Party conferences took place. The Labour Party conference took place in Liverpool, and as that came to a close, the Tories were also preparing for their own week of questions, answers, and revelations in Manchester. Delivering the most crucial information at the Labour conference, Ed Miliband revealed a host of new ideas for universities and stated “the government’s austerity plan is failing…There is an alternative.” With the coalition government’s new policy to cap tuition fees at £9,000, it could leave a student whom graduates after 2015 facing an alarming average of £60,000 worth of debt. At the Labour Conference, Miliband, who voted against the £9,000 tuition fees, claimed that he wanted to “invest in the future of our young people” and proposed a £6,000 cap on fees. However, it is apparent that students are in a sheer state of distrust due to the current government’s decision to cut EMA and to increase tuition fees despite countless protests. The Labour leader said: “Some of you would like no fees at all. I understand this. But it wouldn’t be responsible to make promises I can’t keep. That’s Nick Clegg’s job.”

News In Brief Birthday treat


A 100-year-old woman has celebrated her milestone birthday by hiring a stripper, after she had previously requested a seat on the moon. The lady from Birmingham said the performance “definitely put a smile on my face.” We’re sure it did. Killer curry Two people from Glasgow were hospitalised with severe vomiting and fainting after entering the Worlds Hottest Chilli competition. The contestants were asked to eat as many spoonfuls of the Kismot Killer curry as they could. One woman, who was sent to hospital twice, only came in second after another contestant managed nine spoonfuls. Bravo. Bed-bouncing bottom

Labour leader Ed Miliband. His promises were all well and good but for President of the NUS, Liam Burns, Miliband’s ideas are “not good enough.” Ibraheem Juburi is a second year student at Brunel. He said: “It’s just a bunch of empty promises. Clegg

told us he’d fight against a rise in tuition fees… No wonder we are distrusting when politicians don’t listen to a word young people say.” Peter Smallwood is the Chair of the Conservative Society at Brunel. He said: ”About Labour’s plan, I just

think they are a little bit two faced. They introduce tuition fees, oppose changes and now have plans for an almost incidental system that will cost a little less. They seriously lack leadership!”

Head of Arts heading for Hollywood Ben Moxey The Head of the School of Arts, Dr William Leahy, has made a challenge to the notion that William Shakespeare was the author behind great plays like Romeo and Juliet and Macbeth, in a debate hosted by the English Speaking Union. Greats such as Roland Emmerich and Shakespearean Scholar Stanley Wells CBE joined him in the discussion to ascertain who the real author of the works is. The debate was held in conjunction with Sony Pictures due to the release of multi-award winning director Emmerich’s latest film, Anonymous. The film, staring Derek Jacobi, Rhys Ifans, and recent honorary Brunel graduates Vanessa Redgrave and Mark Rylance, focuses on Queen Elizabeth I’s relationship with Edward de Vere, 17th Earl of Oxford, during which time he is said to have written the full works of William Shakespeare. This is a view that Leahy debates: “I am a sceptic as far as Shakespeare being the author is concerned and I have real problems accepting that he wrote all the plays and poems attributed to him – thus my Master’s


programme [Shakespeare Authorship Studies MA]. But I do not advocate an alternative author – neither Oxford, Bacon, Marlowe, or whoever. Rather,

Brunel University

I support the need to question the authorship and the right for ‘Oxfordians’ to hold their views.” The motion that “This house believes that William Shakespeare


Head of Arts at Brunel, William Leahy. Also, Shakespeare. Don’t stop recycling.

of Stratford-upon-Avon wrote the plays and poems attributed to him” was argued for over an hour with conspiracy, signatures, the role of Hamlet as autobiography, and whether Shakespeare was, in fact, an uneducated commoner all thrown in. At one point, Dr Leahy called Shakespeare “an opportunist” and accused him of stealing works from others. Paul Edmondson, of the Shakespeare Birthplace Trust, rebutted this: “This evening we have been entertained by a postmodern cocktail of historical fact and historical fiction.” In the end, the vote from the floor saw Dr Leahy’s cause voted down, but it is clear that question still remains and that the debate will only grow when Anonymous is released at the end of this month. The debate, which took place in June, was organised by the English Speaking Union and a video of the event is available from their website www.esu. org – search “Shakespeare Authorship Debate.” A documentary called Last Will and Testament will be on show in November in conjunction with the film, which also stars our very own William Leahy.

A woman who tests the quality of the beds in every Premier Inn in the country has had her bottom insured for over £4 million. Natalie Thomas, who has the job title of Director of Bed Bouncing, spends over 20 minutes testing each bed and tests up to 24 beds each day. Gardening with his hoes It seems as though rapper Snoop Dogg has now taken to gardening as he recently appeared in a video asking how to grow giant vegetables. Snoop did keep to his usual style as he appeared in front of a backdrop of cannabis plants. Strip fees Spearmint Rhino are looking for students to strip in their lapdancing clubs in order to pay for their fees. The company said they could offer both good money and “fun” for working in the club. Now that is a different kind of demonstration.

Optae por aut fugitatur rem nonem estio omnis peliquos volorumque venis consequaere essimin audaeri con ima s e c Could you fill this space? l i m ese ror ae sect orrum conse digenis et lam, ut que nos venihilitis et esequiatis beaquiatem ea cus, sequiam est volupti anturepel ipsanimus pro explani eturiae stibustia sequid estiani od ulparunt inctes et archit ut aliquae omni quunt, sequid ut esequi cum volorestem il ium dolent laut fugitiassi iuntis eumqui con cum alibus rest, veruptaspedi Le Nurb consernatet essitaccepts rest fuga. submissions Brunelnus, Nulloriorat quofrom conany escide student. See page 2 to findMet susandi ducid magnatur? out how to getvelecto involved! aut velecaesecto officim enempor eperrum ut doluptur sam quas evendae nam volor rem et eium asperum vitaquis el ma ilium.



Le Nurb - October 2011


Brunel building biofuels future Tom Scott Brunel University are currently working with several companies to help create and test new forms of biofuels for the future of transport. Researchers from the university’s Wolfson Centre for Materials Processing are working on turning both food and crop waste into a form of fuel that could be used to replace oil and other fossil fuels. The fuel is being made from the by-products of agriculture and inedible food products such as straw and cereal milling. There have been concerns about the possible competition

between growing food for fuel and growing food for an ever-increasing population. However, the new research from Brunel has shown that by using the by-products of food and crop waste rather than specially grown crops, these concerns are now long gone. A trial of the new fuel was launched on the 30th September at the UK’s Institute for Food Research (IFR), and the resulting fuel will also be tested by Lotus Engineering. Lotus are hopeful that the new fuel will have a much lower carbon footprint than normal fuels, as well as having a higher performance.

The fuel works by blowing up the food and crop waste and removing the sugar, which is then fermented with yeast to produce the fuel. The research team from Brunel are hoping to maximise the efficiency of this process. Professor Jim Song, the project leader, said: “We are maximising yield at the pre-treatment stage, which makes for high efficiency in the bio-refinery plant itself.” Brunel are also looking into other ways of using this process, including in the food and the cosmetic industries, by creating bio-based antioxidants which can also be found in the same food and crop waste.


Testing new biofuels for the future of transport.

Academics ‘spying’ on foreign students


Academics are suspicious of some foreign students’ visas.

Adam Martley Tens of thousands of migrants are being reported to immigration officials by academics over suspicions concerning the status of their visas. Over 1,500 foreign students were reported every month by universities and foreign student sponsors to the UK Border Agency (UKBA) from March 2009 to August 2010. A campaign group against regulation, the Manifesto Club, has said that the controls currently in place mean that university staff are being forced to spy on students. The director of the Manifesto Club, Josie Appleton, says: “Academics are not border agents, and they should not be dragooned

into spying on their students. The UKBA now has rights of entry to any university campus, which is a major threat to academic autonomy. We call for a more proportionate system, which recognises the historic autonomy of the university.” The University and College Union said it was concerned about the impact the controls have on the relationship between staff and students at universities. General Secretary Sally Hunt says: “It is built on trust and must not be jeopardised by fears that lecturers may be spying on students. Successive governments have had plans to turn lecturers into spooks overwhelmingly rejected by the academic community.”

Concerns about what stricter visa controls might do to the economy have been raised by the Home Affairs Select Committee. Official figures show that the plans, which include an estimated cut in net migration of 230,000 by the end of the parliament, could cost over £3bn. But the UK Border Agency has defended the controls, arguing that universities which sponsor foreign students should “make the necessary checks.” A UKBA spokesman said: “There has been widespread abuse of the visa system for too long and we have made radical changes in order to make the system more rigorous and accountable.”

Students set to strike again

Lecturers take action

Simi Sagoo Protestors are planning another march against tuition fees next month. Following last year’s demonstrations against the proposed £9,000 fees, students from across the UK are to descend into the capital on November 9th, coinciding with the trade union strike action. Last year’s protests resulted in an outbreak of violence, leading to 180 arrests, but had little effect on the government’s new policies. In February earlier this year, Imperial College became the first university to set £9,000 fees. The rest shortly followed. With little trust now left in the coalition government, it was surely only a matter of time before students took to the streets once again. This time, an even bigger movement is to be seen. There is growing unhappiness at the tuition fee rise and the government’s decision to axe its Educational

Bess Browning Brunel students may have some angry lecturers this month as the University and College Union (UCU) has proposed to start up more industrial action against the new pension scheme. Lecturers from 67 UK universities are involved in the programme and will start a “work to contract” if the universities do not begin to negotiate. Actions taken by Union members may include not working any overtime, refusal to cover classes where another lecturer is not available, and not attending staff meetings. University pension changes were brought in from 1st October and after a mostly negative reaction, the UCU has said that they believe that 40,000 members may eventually join the movement. Brunel journalism professor Julian Petley, a member of the Union, thinks the pension scheme will eventually benefit everyone. Julian said: “The pension scheme is, compared to the private sector, reasonably generous. Thus public

Selena Sheridan “No ifs, no buts, no education cuts!” Maintenance Allowance (EMA) which has resulted in a growth of young political activists. As November 9th draws closer,

the future of our country speaks louder. Needless to say, this is going to be a turbulent term. All the recycling. So much recycling.

sector workers have been prepared to accept relatively low wage/ salary levels in return for relatively decent pensions. Now we’re being expected to accept relatively low levels of remuneration plus greatly reduced pensions. The result will be that it will be much more difficult to recruit new, younger people to work in universities. Thus students will be taught by an aging workforce and it will be increasingly difficult to recruit much needed new blood. So your successors will undoubtedly suffer.”

Roger Blackwell

October 2011 - Le Nurb



Brunel excels in statistics yet again George Bowden The percentage of Brunel graduates gaining employment or choosing further study has increased and is well above the national average, according to new figures. The Higher Education Statistics Agency (HESA) data shows that in 2009/10, 91% of respondents were either engaged in further study or had gained employment, an increase of 1.2% on the previous year. It suggests the University’s focus on preparing its students for employment is having an effect, and that students are making use of the on-campus Placement and Careers Centre (PCC). The data also takes into account Brunel’s high percentage of Sandwich course graduates, with the University ranking 7th nationally in 2009/10 with 26.2%, according to HESA.


UK unemployment is at a 17-year high. Nationally, the data shows that the percentage of graduates finding employment rose from 72.4% in 2008/9 to 74.4% in 2009/10, while the percentage of those

unemployed dropped slightly from 7.6% to 7.4%. Overall, students enrolled on courses involving Medicine, Dentistry, Veterinary Science and

Education were most likely to be employed after graduation. While students taking Mathematical Sciences were least likely to be employed, they

were among the most likely to be engaged in further studies. At Brunel, 85% of Mathematics students engaged in further study or employment, a figure well above the national average. Nationally, the biggest increase in the number of students studying a particular subject was in Mathematical Sciences, with an 8% year-on-year rise. Business and Administration, Mass Communication and Engineering all grew by 7%. The latest statistics also show the percentage of students from state schools entering university has increased again, as it has consecutively since 2005/6. They also confirm the 2008/9 fall in the percentage of first year ‘noncontinuation,’ or drop-out rate, to the lowest figure since 1998.

Students happier up north than in London Ben Moxey It seems the students in Scotland have the best time of things, according to a recent poll carried out by student insurance group Endsleigh. 92% of Scottish students said that the nightlife was excellent and 88% said it was good for shopping. Vicki O’Connell, Endsleigh’s Communications Manager, said: “Our research shows that lots of students are very positive about what is available to them at university to broaden their experience of student life. As thousands of young people prepare to embark on a new academic year it is important that universities and university towns and cities continue to recognise the broader value that these additional services can offer.” A panel of nearly 2000 students from up and down Britain were approached on issues from the

nightlife to the supermarkets and transport. Students in the South West said they had the best local leisure centres, and those in Yorkshire loved their supermarkets. Northern university towns trumped their southern rivals, with 69% of students rating them good or excellent overall compared to just 54% in London, and only 64% in the South. As mentioned, things were less rosy for the Londoners. Only 58% of the students asked had a strong feeling for the nightlife in the capital and only 48% liked the museums and galleries. HAVE YOUR SAY So why is London so upset? Too much concrete? Pop onto to have your say!

Rhys Asplundh Edinburgh. Up north. Marijn de Vries Hoogerwerff

Your 9am Monday lecture.

Teaching ‘better at school than university’ Ben Moxey Most students believe they had a better standard of teaching at school than they currently receive at university, a survey has revealed. In a study of 1,000 pupils at the end of their university courses, conducted by the Headmasters’ and Headmistresses’ Council (HMC), some 61% of private students rated their paid-for school teaching higher than their paid-for university teaching. Meanwhile 42% of their state school cousins favoured school and 38% university teaching, with

My recycling brings all the boys to the yard.

the remaining 20% saying they were about the same. Kenneth Durham, headmaster of University College School, Hampstead, north London, and the HMC chairman, said: “At a time when school qualifications are under review and when university tuition is coming under greater scrutiny, these findings prove that the independent sector has much to contribute when considering the crucial transition from school to university.” For an in-depth look at Brunel’s value-for-money, turn to page 12.


Le Nurb - October 2011


Optae por aut fugitatur rem nonem estio omnis peliquos volorumque venis consequaere essimin audaeri con ima s e c Could you fill this space? l i m ese ror ae sect orrum conse digenis et lam, ut que nos venihilitis et esequiatis beaquiatem ea cus, sequiam est volupti anturepel ipsanimus pro explani eturiae stibustia sequid estiani od ulparunt inctes et archit ut aliquae omni quunt, sequid ut esequi cum volorestem il ium dolent laut fugitiassi iuntis eumqui con cum alibus rest, veruptaspedi consernatet essit rest fuga. Nulloriorat quo con escide nus, susandi ducid magnatur? Met aut velecaesecto velecto officim enempor eperrum ut doluptur samLe quas Nurb evendae acceptsnam submissions volor rem et from eium any asperum Brunel student. vitaquis Seeelpage ma sum 2 to is find ipsundiate out how to vitget presti involved! te nia eturepernam simus doluptus. Ad ulpa sim que num verro tem natibustia corehentiunt perum volorem quam, consed quunt odictur abo. Nem. Vid que officina Min peritatem veligent perionseque name optaessedit, invenim illab ipsam ipidempor molupid que vere dolupta quasperem ea doluptur, que est quo quistrum qui ut enet dollabo. Et explam harciumquiae voluptiis ariatur, nem. Itatibusda cum nistrunt quatis aliquia nderia volent. Cumquia dicia et volorem. Emped mi, con conestrundit quodictia alibust ut quatibus, quo et repres rende consequia quas. Usanditibus sum eosandi.


The University’s Fairtrade Steering Group sustainability Your VP Community Welfare speaks. Avina Patel With over 15,000 students and 2,500 staff, Brunel has enormous social, economic, and environmental impact. The Environmental Strategy Group (ESG) have been planning, implementing and monitoring the University’s environmental performance since 2007. With the public’s growing awareness of environmental issues, combined with government pressure, we have been working to integrate environmental responsibilities in every aspect of the University’s operation. In 2011, Brunel came 50th in the Green League among out of 144 HEIs. An additional 8.5 points were collected for environmental management planning and strategies, ensuring that the University has a sound and holistic approach to moving towards green practices as a whole. The University’s Environmental Policy states the University’s firm commitment to reducing adverse environmental impacts and guides us to embed sustainability

in every aspect of the University’s activities – teaching, research, service, and operation. Through this first annual environmental report, we aim to track our activities and communicate the significant environmental aspects and impacts of the University to the community. In addition, we hope to share our progress toward achieving a greener campus. CAMPUS IN NUMBERS


Current Brunel students.


Residential Brunel students.


Members of staff.


Parking spaces on campus.


Total size in hectares.


University-owned vehicles.


Non-residential buildings.


Residential buildings.

Your VP Community Welfare speaks again! Avina Patel

The Brunel Fairtrade Steering Group, established in January 2009, monitors the Fairtrade Policy. The group is chaired by the Pro Vice-Chancellor (External Relations & Teaching Quality) Professor Ian Campbell, and membership includes representatives from Catering, UBS, and Services. It is hoped that more academic staff will be recruited in the coming year, with the possibility of increased awareness through the curriculum. The group has been successfully promoting Fairtrade principles and delivering real change to the operation of the University. Brunel has been a Fairtrade university since 2009. Being a Fairtrade university means that all coffee and tea served on campus is Fairtrade and that the University makes a special effort to stock more ethically sound food, drink, and clothing across the campus. The Union of Brunel Students (UBS) has been leading various Fairtrade campaigns and events, including ’Fairtrade Fortnight’, on campus. Some of their most popular events:

inform students and staff of the history of Fairtrade and the implications of their purchasing Fairtrade products.

- Over 20 students participated in designing a T-shirt with Fairtrade themes to highlight the importance of raising awareness of product materials’ origins.

- The Fairtrade exhibition and Fashion Show were held to It’s a long way to the top if you wanna recycle.

- Unfair Funfair games such as Sumo Wrestling were organised to symbolise the shackles of oppression that communities in developing countries face. JOIN THE GROUP Why not join our Fairtrade steering group? Contact Linda Hazell:

Union of Brunel Students

October 2011 - Le Nurb



Welcome to all things ‘Sports Federation’ Keen son of a keeno. Stewart Bailey Hello to all you keen Le Nurb readers! I am Stewart Bailey, your Sports Federation Chair for your Student Union. I am currently in my third year at Brunel, studying Sport and Exercise Science. Looking at what I study, I guess this tells you a lot about me. I love sport! I was elected for this position in the Union back in March by all you wonderful people who took your time to vote. I am really passionate about Brunel and Sport. This, along with being really keen to get involved with the union, makes this part time role perfect for me! Some of you may wonder what I do as the Sports Federation Chair. Predominately, my role is to support you and your clubs by

representing Brunel Sport at the Student Assembly. I am involved with organising Varsity and Tour, and hosting the huge end of year event, Sports Federation Ball. Along with these roles, I also chair the Sports Forum meetings and chair the Sports Federation Committee. Elections for the Sports Federation Committee are fast approaching, and nominations will take place at the next Sports Forum on 21st October at 1pm in Academy. Let me tell you a little bit about this great opportunity to get involved with your union and Brunel Sport, as well as boost your CV! As a committee member, you Have five main roles: budget setting, parental role of clubs, deciding where the development fund is spent, assisting in the organisation of Varsity and Sports Federation Ball, as well as suggesting any ideas or projects that you may have. Ideally, I

would love it if as many clubs as possible had one member represented in the nominations, competing for six committee positions available. If you have a big interest in sport and are keen to make a difference in Brunel, email Gary O’Brien at vp.activities@brunel. to show your interest in Sports Federation Committee elections! You will be required to write a couple of paragraph and give a 1-2 minute speech on why you want to be on the committee, with reasons why fellow sporting Brunelians should vote for you. It is essential that you attend the next Sports Forum; elections will then be listed on brunelstudents. com and voting will commence. It is a very exciting year for sport, with the Olympics coming to London next summer and Brunel hosting the South Korean team and the Canadian Paralympics team. Across the year, we have many events


Our Sports Fed Chair proudly holding the Olympic flame for Brunel. taking place on campus. We have already had the Olympic Torch on Campus earlier this month and we have a lot more to come, so keep an eye out! I look forward to meeting all of you sporting keenos throughout the year! Leaving you with the best

advice that I had before I came to Brunel - get involved and try something new. FIND OUT MORE Get in touch with Stewart via

Societies have a new leader Student Assembly returns for 2011 Sweetie, darling... make me look awesome.

Sean Smith Let me take a moment of your coffee break to introduce myself. I’m Sean Smith, Chair of the UBS Guild of Societies. I know last year was not a great one for

our Societies; I understand from my own experience that it was leaderless and lacking in direction, and I hope to change that. The premise with which I start this year is simple: to increase awareness of societies and their activities, to increase involvement, inclusion and a sense of unity and to award their success. Of course, I have some ideas of my own. For example, I want to establish a tradition of Kamil Kurnikoff

Welcome to Team Student Activities (Stewart, Gary and Sean).

rewarding the dedication and hard work of our societies by hosting Brunel’s first annual Societies Guild Awards evening, increasing society involvement with the student media (watch this space!), holding integrated, cross society events and socials, and with the help and initiative of Gary O’Brien, our VP for Student Activities, get our societies going on relevant tours and trips, which can only be a huge boost both on a personal and society level. But I can’t do it alone! I want people to be passionate and excited about their societies and to get involved to make them a success. In short, helping you to help yourselves. So get in touch, get involved and get your society out there. Elections for the guild committee are taking place in the next few weeks, so get in touch if you want to stand. I’m here for you, to represent you and your interests, not just a different face on a few inches of newspaper print. As long as I chair the Societies Guild, I promise to work tirelessly to help you achieve excellence in anything you set your minds to, so that together we can build a better, more inclusive and exciting Brunel.

Who will butter my toast? Tom Scott The first student assembly of this academic year will occur on Thursday 27th October. For those who do not know, student assembly is the main decision making body of the Union of Brunel Students. It creates and oversees the guiding policies of the Union and has the ability to hold both the sabbatical officers and the part time chairs to account. Student Assembly is attended by the four student officers, the 4 standing committee chairs and the 6 working group chairs. There can also be 2 members representing each school of the university and finally up to 20 students who represent the entire student body, known as community members. These final positions (both

school and community members) are voted on during the autumn elections campaign, so check out page 13 to see the candidates. Student assembly is an excellent chance for students to get their voices heard and have their say. Any student may attend a student assembly meetings are open to all students to attend, although only members may be able to vote. Last year was an excellent year for student assembly with an entirely full roster of members. A motion made at last years student assembly led over 400 students to the National Demonstration in November of last year. Student Assembly meets on the last Thursday of every month, in the Wilfred Brown Council Chambers at 6pm. FIND OUT MORE Contact Rich, our Democratic Support Co-ordinator:

The UBS take to the skies for charity Hi, Mum, I’m in the paper! Amy Blackford On the 12th November, seventeen members of staff, officers and chairs from the Union of Brunel Students and Brunel University staff, both past and present, will

be taking to the skies for charity. Organised by last year’s President Priya Pallan, the group will be raising money for the community cancer care centre. The team are looking to raise a minimum of £4100 and will greatly appreciate any donation, however big or small. All seventeen divers have been trying any and all ways possible to raise money for the dive. Along

with the usual pleas for your money, the team have organised a series of events attempting to raise the money in time for the dive. VP Community Welfare Avina Patel has been slaving over a hot stove baking cakes to sell and organising a car wash, along with several other events. Campaigns Chair, Zein Owfar, has also pledged to shave off all

of his hair from his glorious Afro if the team raises enough money. Media Chair Tom Scott, who runs the pub quiz every Sunday night in Loco’s, will be hosting a raffle every Sunday night until the dive. The raffle will include tickets for Academy and also passes to the Lancaster Spa. Always be on the lookout for UBS staff and officers who will always be on hand outside of

Like a virgin. Recycling for the very first time.

the Academy to give you a great discount on glowsticks. The Brunel Sky Dive is a fantastic event and the Le Nurb team wishes the jumpers the best of luck. HOW TO DONATE To support the jump, go online at brunelskydivers.


Le Nurb - October 2011


X Factor - talent show or freak show? Student who loves coffee, cats and Sundays. Nadia Henderson Last weekend saw hopefuls of all ages and backgrounds have their dreams shattered and realised in L.A as the X Factor judges made the life changing decisions of who to include in the show’s final 16. Despite the stiff competition, the choices were made in a highly emotional episode, and we now have our final 16 – featuring an eclectic group of timid 16-yearolds, irritating 20-somethings, and a middle aged man who sounds like an 80-year-old woman. Perhaps I’m being too harsh here. While many of the contestants do have singing ability and appear to be genuinely nice people, I can’t help but feel like I’ve seen it all before – last year, to be precise, and the year before. Whether it dominates your weekend T.V schedule for the last quarter of the year, or makes you want to throw your 32-inch out the window, there is no denying that X Factor gets us talking. The token “freaks” parades every year, the predictable judge fallouts and the audience’s try-hard rebellions (Wagner, anyone?) keep millions of us entertained every week, year after year. I am first to concede to the addictive nature of the show’s early auditions – I too watched in horror at Shirlena Johnson’s frankly terrifying rendition of Duffy’s hit Mercy. However, the X Factor raises some serious questions; concerns that get lost in the glittering land

of opportunity that is presented on our screens. Last August, 30-year-old mother Shirlena howled and screamed down the microphone, giving a performance that secured her a place in the next stage of the competition. Unthinkable? No, because what fun would X Factor be if every contestant could sing? Unlike the stories of Jedward and Wagner, however, Shirlena’s ended soon after her audition when it was revealed that she had mental health issues. But not all vulnerable contenders are protected in this way; many have been, and still remain to be, exploited by the producers for the public’s entertainment. It is not just the potential pop stars that are being exploited; the audience is also subject to the show’s producers’ manipulation. Each contestant invariably has a sob story poignantly related before his or her first audition. Stories that are often genuinely sad – deaths in the family, childhood trauma, tales of poverty and disease. Perhaps without them even knowing it, hopefuls such as this year’s Misha Bryan have secured the public’s sympathy vote before they’ve sung a single note. And I can’t help noticing that it is only those that give knockout, win worthy performances that have their tragic private lives aired. This is where the fun, noharm nature of shows like X Factor and Britain’s Got Talent becomes something a little more threatening. With rumours aplenty suggesting that X Factor is fixed from the start, it is even harder to

believe that the producers would let an act like Jedward or this year’s Goldie – both totally unmarketable – win the grand prize. So why are their hopes raised week after week, just to be dashed at the crucial moment? One of the youngest contestants ever to have reached the Judges’ Houses stage, 16-year-old Luke Lucas, broke down in tears when Gary Barlow expelled him from the competition, blaming his disappointing performance. Janet Devlin, praised by Kelly Rowland for her “innocence,” joins fellow Sweet Sixteener Amelia Lily as they embark on what could be the most stressful, intensely emotional experience of their young lives to date. With so much pressure to conform to what the judges and the public want, 16 could well be too young to deal with such a dog-eat-dog, winner-takes-all environment. Is this world of fame, fortune, and forgettable faces a positive lifestyle to advocate? Taking a look at some of the X Factor winners from days gone by – Shayne Ward, Leon Jackson, Steve Brookstein and, most recently, Joe McElderry – it is clear that once the confetti has settled and the champagne gone flat, life after X Factor is far from a walk in the park. Self-made acts – like The XX, Laura Marling, and Regina Spektor, to name a few – have found success and popularity without the aid of reality T.V. Sure, competing in the X Factor requires hard work, perseverance, and nerves of steel, but manufactured musicians are becoming less and less relevant in today’s cultural realm.

Thanks a latte

vivo antioxidants that reside in our tissues are crucial and do the grand old job of ‘calming down’ (I won’t bore you with the detail) harmful un-paired oxygen molecules (known as free radicals) that are produced by us just being alive – what a paradox. Ingesting a minute amount of these antioxidants in your morning brew will not make a significant difference to wellbeing. (Results produce an unacceptable P value for all you

Roger Price

What do you really know about your morning coffee? Aspiring Biochemist tries to put the ‘stud’ in study. Jack Parnell This month sees a fantastic event all in the name of charity – The Macmillan Cancer Support ‘Worlds Biggest Coffee Morning.’ They’re a charity I hold close to my heart and have been volunteering for since January of last year (shameless

plugging). I see this as both a great fundraising event and an excuse to show you why coffee is the “dog’s wotsits” of hot drinks – through careful scientific reasoning of course. Let’s firstly displace a basic myth about those holy entities: antioxidants. Countless claims have been made that coffee – and many other products – contain powerful antioxidants that ward of neurological disease and diabetes and boost brain function and liver metabolism... bollocks. Yes, in

Coffee is the “dog’s wotsits” of hot drinks.

stats nerds.) However, scientific mumbo-jumbo aside, coffee – and particularly its famed constituent, caffeine – has some rather useful tricks up its sleeve. Firstly, caffeine can cross the blood/brain barrier – a cheeky technique, as it’s fairly selective! Oops, I recycled again.

Lisa McGarry

Is X Factor really about talent, or is the show turning into a joke? Following the flailing viewing numbers of the U.S. edition of X Factor, there is a small glimmer of hope that the Blighty version might, some day, meet the same end. In a time where our music charts are saturated by manufactured, overstylized carbon copies, it would

come as a welcome change if the Christmas number one wasn’t inexorably the winner’s, and if Saturday night telly was no longer dominated by a sorry excuse for a talent show.

This means it can exert an effect neurologically, something we’re all familiar with when working into the night: it keeps you alert and gives you a boost! How? First, it gets in the way of the chemical that makes you sleepy (that acts by slowing neuronal conduction) – adenosine. By acting as an adenosine antagonist, caffeine actually increases neuronal firing leading to a release of adrenaline. This results in an elevated heart rate, release of glucose from glycogen stores, and higher blood pressure, giving you that boost. Secondly, caffeine is metabolized in the liver to produce three chemicals (paraxanthine, theobromine, and theophylinne. Please note I hate using big words as such, namely because my mates don’t understand them and I’m shit at spelling.) These metabolic by-products increase the breakdown of fats, dilating blood vessels and relaxing smooth muscle in the lungs without having much detriment on the body. Hence, the use of caffeine in sport and exercise studies is on the rise. There are countless studies claiming to show that coffee halts cancer development or decreases the chance of stroke by half. Until

some kind of meta-analysis or Cochrane review is undertaken, though, I’d treat the results with utmost skepticism. Despite how positively they are put across to you by the mainstream media – yes, you, the Daily Mirror. However, in my humble opinion, the good far outweighs the bad. Yes, caffeine is a drug, but in moderation it’s fine (like anything), plus it tastes good and contains a lot less sugar than soft drinks. So, get down to Rococo, get a cup of coffee, and enjoy it in all its glory. Optae por aut fugitatur rem nonem c o n Could you fill this space? ima sec lim ese ror ae sect orrum conse digenis et lam, ut que nos venihilitis et esequiatis beaquiatem ea cus, sequiam est volupti anturepel ipsanimus pro explani eturiae stibustia sequid estiani od ulparunt inctes et archit ut aliquae omni quunt, sequid ut esequi cum volorestem il ium dolent laut fugitiassi iuntis eumqui con cum alibus Le Nurb rest,accepts veruptaspedi consernatet submissionsessit from any rest Brunel fuga. Nulloriorat student. quo See page con 2escide to findnus, susandi outducid how magnatur? to get involved! Met aut.


October 2011 - Le Nurb



Code. Creative Writing Society President. Likes listening to wordless music and doing things old school.

Katherine Kourbeti Every night I fall asleep to the sound of his guitar. I’m lying on my bed, a sheet messily covering my half-dressed body, and he’s sitting up at the edge, gently picking the chords in the half-darkness, singing me a song he wrote that has no words. It’s not that he can’t write the words; he doesn’t want to. He says it’s complete just as it is. He sings it to me every night, lulling me to sleep with the soft movement on the mattress. Just as I feel my consciousness drifting, I reach over and seek his hand. I find it and entwine my fingers with his—the music stops, and sweet silence fills the room. He puts the guitar down on the floor with barely a sound and climbs under the linen sheet next to me, his hand still grasping mine. Our legs entangle and I draw him close to me, so I can feel his breath on my face. The last thing I feel is his other hand embracing me, and a soft kiss on my head. Every morning when we wake up I remember how we met, because I make him coffee and breakfast and serve it on the kitchen table, and he smiles at me without saying a word as he begins to eat. When he first called me over to his table he looked for my name tag on my uniform, to call me by my name. He asked for another cup of coffee, and thanked me with nothing but a smile. A few minutes later I tripped

over and broke two plates and a milkshake glass, and because he was near he helped me pick the shards up, even though he didn’t have to. I got yelled at doubly because a customer had helped me clean up, but it didn’t matter because he came back the next day and the one after, with the same order and the same silent thank you. And though it’s been a long while since then, I still want to bring him his breakfast as I did back then, because I want to see the same grateful smile on his face that says more than words ever could. It’s like an unspoken agreement between the two of us, unchanging. I take comfort in the morning routine. It makes the old days lighten up in hindsight, because he was there amidst all the ugliness. Every time I ask him a question, he’ll answer with few words, a movement of his head, a smile. He’s not much of a speaker; he lets me talk most of the time, which is fine except for the times I want to hear him say something... something more than a yes, or a no, or a maybe. Sometimes he just begins to hum in response, the familiar melody of our goodnight song without any words being all there is to it. I think I’m beginning to understand what it means, the more he keeps singing it to me. It’s like a code, a hidden message, a feeling so strong that only music can explain. In the night I’ll squeeze his hand tighter, kiss him harder, let him know I understand. And in the morning I’ll make the best pancakes, the best coffee, and he’ll


‘He’s sitting up at the edge, gently picking the chords in the half-darkness’ smile at me, letting me know he knows I understand. Every day that passes my hand slips all the more comfortably into his when we’re walking to work; he takes me to the public library, walks me up the steps to the door, kisses me goodbye and walks down the five blocks to the second-hand music instruments shop where, in the dusty basement beneath, he fixes the broken guitars and

basses and ukuleles people bring for repair. On the way back we buy groceries and sometimes a cake from the French place a little further up from our apartment. Sometimes, as we’re walking, I can hear him humming our goodnight song. I look up at him and he just smiles back, like in the mornings, humming his song like in the nights. I feel my heart swell with happiness, and I squeeze his hand

in mine a little tighter. With each passing moment, this feeling only grows. Sometimes I wonder if this is even possible, if I can even care about someone this much, or more than this, and I am surprised to find out that I can. Days turn into nights, back to the guitar and the lullaby, the entwining of our bodies in the half-darkness, the sweet silence afterward. In the morning it all begins again.

Boa constrictor society English and Creative writing student, loves music gigs and food. Lucy Meredith Try – if you can - to imagine a world in which there is no trust. Where everywhere you go you find yourself checking over your shoulder but then re-thinking the action because it might provoke an unwanted reaction from the suspected follower. That was the world I occupied. There was one night that sticks to the forefront of my mind. It may have been November but there’s no real way of knowing for sure any more; the seasons blur into one, dense, grey mire and time is only relative to those people who have taken the clocks away from us. I was listening through my flat two window wondering ‘Who the hell is stupid enough to venture?’ Nobody goes out any more – only the occasional foreigner who’s stumbled into this corridor of dictatorship purely by accident. But this one night, I hear voices on the street, something that has long been forgotten as a normal aspect of day-to-day life. A man’s And she’s buying a stairway to recycling heaven.

deep, guttural drool assaults the cold night air and it takes me a while to perceive that he’s not just another who has been driven to the streets out of the madness that ensues from isolation; he seems to be talking to himself. But as I listen intently – simply because I daren’t look – another’s whimper can occasionally be picked out. It was an encounter between a man and child; the youth still think they can challenge and break the cycle. The drool becomes quieter – the

The night has swallowed both man and child whole. deadly, venomous kind of quiet – as the other’s voice becomes shrill but then suddenly stifled, suffocated by morbid brutality. And then silence; the night has swallowed both man and child whole. I don’t know if anyone else had considered going down to intervene; intervention would result in the same fate as the child’s. That is the only thing that all of us know for certain.

Le Nurb - October 2011


Have fun and still eat - money management, the basics Passionate English student changing the world with words. Daniella Nzekwe In life, everything boils down to money. That’s what we always talk about and never seem to have enough of. Most of us are living a lifestyle that is not sustainable and need to go back to basics. That means you should think twice before using half of your student loan on designer clothes. I don’t mean that we should all become super tight and never spend, it is about spending wisely. As students, we are given a large amount of money at one time, and need to make sure it spreads the duration of the term. Unfortunately, by the end of October most of us are broke and wondering how we are going to survive until January. You don’t have to be that person. With a few savvy saving tips, you can fully enjoy student life and still have enough for a takeaway. The first thing to do is make a weekly budget. This should include things like how much you plan to spend on food and social activities. Having food is essential, as is

paying your phone bill. Try and be as realistic as possible. If you know that you are planning to go out more than usual in a particular week, budget accordingly. However, even with the best intentions, things can go wrong, and you could end up spending more then you planned.

Unfortunately, by the end of October most of us are broke and wondering how we are going to survive until January. That is fine, just make sure it doesn’t happen often. There are also going to be times when you are invited out and you can’t afford it. Don’t feel ashamed to be honest with your friends. As a student you should grow accustomed to this. Don’t allow this to ruin your fun, instead find an alternative. Get your friends together and split the price of a bottle of alcohol. You will end up spending less, drinking responsibly, and still having fun. Alternatively you could give your

liver a night off and host a Come Dine With Me style dinner party. Be creative; you will be surprised with what ideas you come up with. Your weekly budget is personal to you, and amounts will vary according to how much money you have. Some of you may have a part time job, or have additional money from parents. Try and use this additional money wisely and, when possible, save for a rainy day. You never know when that money may come in handy and get you out of a sticky situation. That’s all you need to know about managing money. The next important thing to learn is how you can save money. One of the things I love about being a student is the amount of discounts that are available. Getting an NUS Card is essential because it gives you discounts in many shops. Websites such as Amazon and ASOS also offer discount. Also look out for special promotions where shops will give students 20% off for a limited period. The Pavilion shopping mall in Uxbridge has a free discount card called Reward me. This entitles you to different discounts within the shopping mall and they are changing all the time. Never be afraid to ask for discounts, especially in market places. The


It’s important to have fun at uni, but equally so to budget sensibly! money you save through discounts can be used on other things. Learning how to manage money effectively is hard and will be an ongoing process that will continue way past your years as a student. Budgeting allows you to maintain a

decent standard of living. Being a student is stressful enough without having to worry about money as well. Now that you understand the basics of money management you are free to enjoy student life without feeling deprived.

The big test: life after university English and Film/TV student. Saira Salim Once again another year of University has begun. Whether you are in first, second or third year we are all living the highly anticipated student life. Some of us have finally reached the closing chapter of our educational journey. We are the Super Mario’s who from the very first day of school have been jumping through pipes to obtain our gold coins, tackling our hardships by leaping on its head, and had some help along the way from our friends Yoshi and Luigi to get where we are today. Yes, we are the chosen ones who, according to society, are the youth of today who will carry the flame of success and progression of Britain, and at the same time living ‘la dolce vita’ which to many of you would be a hazy vague memory of ‘Freshers week’ which ultimately turned into ‘Freshers year-and-a-half.’ For some of you the fun has just started, for others the sobering notion of entering the final year settles in and puts many into work frenzy. But whatever stage we are at we all have high hopes that University will take us down the road of success in the form of a well paid job. But recently things have taken a drastic turn. Once we leave University what happens next?

The once promising afterlife of University is seeming to diminish as we see more and more students struggling to find jobs that suit their career paths. For myself this has definitely put extra pressure on me to do well in my degree. But even so will it be worth it? I have often asked myself, would I have been better off going straight into work if that’s where I’m heading for anyway, and are there others like me who are worried about this problem too? Anum Roshan, 3rd year. Film and TV student: ‘Yeah I definitely am scared of not being able to find a job! The media industry is quite hard to get into, especially with the amount of students applying these days.’ Shahida Malik, 3rd year. Pure Math student: ‘Yes I am worried, I didn’t go to university to ultimately get job as waitress. If I had known it was going to be like this I would have got an apprenticeship. I would rather be in a position of paying off my loans because I would be earning good money. Robert Brown, 1st year. Sociology student: ‘To be honest I’ve been more excited about the prospect of getting into university. It’s been in the back of my mind, and I will be more concerned as time goes on, but we’ll see what the future holds.’ So it seems I’m not being a cynic and these problems definitely are worrying other students, and with Leaving uni starts another chapter in your life, make sure you’re prepared. good reason. A postgraduate, who wished not to be named, earned a degree in Aerospace engineering. An impressive degree you might think. But only after two years working for Rolls Royce, he was cut from the team and has been out of work for three years. If this can happen to an Aerospace engineer, what chance do the rest of us have? I would love to be able to solve this problem by offering a simple and sweet solution. Unfortunately, the situation is out of my hands. But don’t despair fellow students! There is thin shimmer of golden light called hope, and fortunately, there are some things you can do to your advantage in gaining that well paid high fly job your neighbors will be jealous of. I’m just a poor boy, nobody recycles me.

Number 1. Experience – Now I know many of you first years are still enjoying the novelty of university. But you first years are at an advantage. Summer holidays are a prime opportunity to get some work experience. Even if it’s for free. By the end of university you’ll have at least three years of experience on your hands which will make you stand out from others. Number 2. Networking – Whether you gain a placement for experience or not, networking is another key factor on your road to success. Being talkative and social will earn that likability factor. Find networking events that you can attend and talk to as many people as you can. You never know who you may encounter!

Number 3. Check your CV – Make use of your University facilities! Make an appointment with the Jobshop and enquire about CV building opportunities so someone can look over your CV. The helpful staff will be able to spruce up your CV and make you look like even more of a desirable candidate. It’s important not to panic about this less than desirable situation and make use of the job center and staff at Brunel to help you along the way. Who really knows how the future will turn out for any of us? The least expected turn of events could happen for better or worse. Just one more sound piece of advice, be prepared, and hopefully your life after university will be a prosperous one for you.

October 2011 - Le Nurb


Size zero to size healthy? Marc Jacobs thinks so Fashion correspondent, living life in the moment. Devina Sanghani For the last decade, the fashion industry has seen an increasing demand for size zero models, from the likes of Alexa Chung and Erin O’Conner to Cheryl Cole. The Gucci Group, Nicole Farhi, and Versace are some of the couture houses to participate in casting “super-skinny” models for their catwalks and campaigns.

The importance placed on promoting that which opposes the traditional stereotype for models is greater than we thought. However, following the death of Luisel Ramos, a twenty-twoyear-old top Uruguayan model and ultimate fashion victim, in September 2006, Milan and Madrid publicly annowunced a ban on “sickly skinny” (quoting former Milan mayor Letizia Moratti) models from the catwalk. The horrific story of Ramos’s death initiated numerous debates around the ban of size zero models, especially when it was revealed that she weighed just slightly over 7 stone, with an astonishingly unhealthy body mass index of 17. Recently, it seems a new and – as most agree – positive trend has emerged: for fashion designers to use healthier sized girls in advertising their brands. While it is

not unusual for fashion magazines to employ the occasional plus-size model, it is pleasantly surprising that a leading publication Vogue Italia featured not only one, but three size 16 models (Tara Lynn, Candice Huffine, and Robyn Lawley) on the front cover of their July 2011 issue, entitled “Real Beauties.” Taking this all a step further, Marc Jacobs, one of the world’s most successful and current design labels, is set to become the first major fashion house to create a clothing line catering for women size 14 and above. The line will be unveiled during the autumn/winter ’13 New York Fashion Week. This innovative designer first launched his label in 1986 and has since produced menswear, womenswear, Marc by Marc Jacobs, and Little Marc Jacobs. The lines, ranging from accessories and jewellery to iconic catwalk pieces, establish his high-end, contemporary designer label. Interestingly, while Marc Jacobs addresses a need for change within the fashion industry, it seems shocking that his casting director chose 5ft 11 Swedish model Chloe Memisevic (with a BMI of 15) as the face of the company not long ago. Following the rumours around this collection, many claimed that Marc Jacobs was being hypocritical in this supposed “PR scandal.” Either way, if his plus-size range is successful, it would encourage other fashion houses to follow in his footsteps. Former consultant for the Louis Vuitton brand, Jonathan Heaf, credits the designer on his coming line: “If anyone can turn their hand to plus size clothes – out to create something elegant rather than simply make a splash for their own name – it’s Marc.” Currently, labels including Erdem and Victoria Beckham do not create pieces above size 14, with designers

claiming that “it is harder to create clothes for larger women.” This is a huge step for anyone to make in in a rather superficial industry, which currently consists of creatives who are often against plus-size models. For example, Julian McDonald, British designer and judge on the TV show Britain’s Next Top Model, said that it would be “a joke” if a plus-size model won the contest. Designers and casting directors with such mentalities play a huge part in the increasing figures of girls suffering from psychological illnesses such as anorexia and bulimia. This “light” that the fashion industry will be embracing seems nothing but a positive change. The business partner of Marc Jacobs, Robert Duffy, visualises model Crystal Renn, who is a size 14 rather than the typical size 8, as the possible face and inspiration for this coming line. Crystal Renn, the first plus-size supermodel to

A positive trend has emerged: for fashion designers to use healthier sized girls in advertising their brands. appear on the catwalk for labels such as Jean Paul Gaultier and Chanel, welcomes Marc Jacobs new plus-size range: “I don’t want young women to think being thin is the only way to be beautiful. Beauty is not a pant size…I think it’s a positive move because it sends a fantastic message to women, showing that Marc Jacobs believes diversity is beautiful, a message shown by

Rachael Gibson his previous ad campaigns which challenged us to look at beauty in a different way.” Perhaps the importance placed on promoting that which opposes the traditional stereotype for models is greater than we thought. Singer Adele graces the October Englishwoman cover of Vogue, and although the English Rose speaks

of her insecurities and jokes about herself more suiting the “face of full-fat Coke,” Vogue celebrates her “distinctive” style on one of the most amazing covers to date. Here’s to looking forward to a dramatic and increasingly overdue change for the fashion industry!

Congratulations, you work for the NHS Pompous, pointy Disney villain. Rhys Jones

Cigarette vending machines are now banned in England. Yes, apparently people still use them. You scrabble together an eye-watering amount of change after being told by the bouncer that you can’t leave once you’re in, and struggle through a


heaving crowd to feed it in to a machine that, if you’re lucky, gives you a paltry 16 fags to burn through on your debauched night out. They’re crap. But that isn’t the point, is it? As you may have guessed, I am a smoker – and I work for the NHS. No one actually asked me to, it isn’t my job – but it has been decided, over several years, that I am no longer a sovereign individual. But it isn’t just smokers. You aren’t either. Let me explain. I am of the view that you own your body, and you’re fully entitled to do whatever you damn well want with it as long as it doesn’t directly harm someone else. For the most part, it seems, the government disagrees. Whilst we’ve already seen the effects of the dismal failure that is the War on Drugs, the War on Smoking isn’t cold any more. It’s in full swing. Increases in taxes, bans, and utterly loathsome behaviour and insults (god, all the fake coughing!) targeted at those who partake of the tobacco plant have all been, at least partly, justified by the mantra “it costs the NHS money.” You may agree. But consider, at the moment, that the I recycled myself today.

amount of tax smokers currently pay (over £10.5bn a year in VAT and excise) covers the cost of smoking to the NHS (approx £2.5bn) more than four times over. That doesn’t stop governments trying to force lifestyle changes based on appeasing the sacred cow, though. And it seems you’re next. The wars on alcohol, salt, sweets, sugar and fat haven’t been announced yet. But the armies are limbering up.

The wars on alcohol, salt, sweets, sugar and fat haven’t been announced yet. But the armies are limbering up. Denmark has already introduced a “fat tax” on such luxury goods as milk and butter. Interest groups in the UK are queuing up to follow the example (one that hurts those who

can’t afford the more expensive “healthy options” more), using again the same excuse: your disgusting way of life costs the NHS money. As if it doesn’t work for you. As if you have implicitly agreed to modify your perfectly normal lifestyle in an effort to make things easier for the government. As if you certainly can’t be trusted with managing your own diet. The government does have a responsibility to ensure that healthy foods are consumed within school in the meals they provide (banning Mars bars is not the same thing), but they do not have a moral right to regulate behind closed doors. All sorts of things cost the NHS money: motorbikes; sex (if you’re not careful); rugby; beds (11 deaths a year in the UK); Cannabis (1 death a year sometimes). It doesn’t mean you have a responsibility not to enjoy them. Perhaps not all of the previous examples at once though. Remember: stand with those whose personal choices you find distasteful. Because they know how it feels, you’ll have their support when the ban-happy legislators come for you.

Le Nurb - October 2011


Our rising tuition fees - your opinions English and Creative Writing student who loves to shop ‘til sunset and party ‘til sunrise!

Hayley Baldwin This time next year, students who will face the colossal tuition fees will have been at university for one month. Brunel has raised its fees to £9000, do the students on campus think that it is worth it? The idea of having a £27,000 tuition debt, or in some cases even more, is horrifying, especially for those who do not get help from the government. In the Sunday Times’ University Guide 2012, Brunel has risen by 10 places to 39th, placing it in the top third of UK institutions. The university boasts of its excellence in student satisfaction, has a high graduate employment rate, and spends a huge amount of money updating and refurbishing facilities regularly. On the other hand, many students have experienced: unorganised schools, insufficient books and computers in the library, and poor communication between staff and students. Here are the opinions of four thirdyear students. Each student studies a different course and belongs to a different school. They have been here long enough to judge the university and give a valid viewpoint.

YES Abbie Bean, Matt Baldwin, History: Industrial Design: Brunel’s History course ranks higher Brunel is renowned for its than Oxford, coming in third place Industrial Design course and, on the 2012 Guardian’s University like History, comes third in Guide. Abbie says if she were to enrol the country on the Guardian’s in 2012, she would be “undeterred by University Guide, with an 86 higher fees” because of “the course, per cent satisfaction rate. Matt the university and the campus life is in his third and final year, and it offers.” Brunel was Abbie’s first despite Brunel not being his first choice and she wouldn’t change choice, if he were starting in anything about it. The History 2012 he would pay the £9,000 course has received a 100 per cent annual fee. His main reason is because of Brunel’s position on the league tables, but he also In the Sunday Times’ feels the course is broad and very University Guide 2012, challenging, “you are pushed a lot.” He is convinced the rise Brunel has risen by 10 in tuition fees is a bad thing: “I understand the money has got to places to 39th, placing come from somewhere, but “the huge increase is not justified.” it in the top third of UK As an Industrial Design student he says his course is worth the institutions. money he is paying now because student satisfaction score, which of the course quality and all was no surprise to Abbie, as she the resources they need. This is says her “lecturers and department especially true for his third year work hard to ensure student because they “can call upon satisfaction and offer help when lecturers whenever and they put required with coursework or general on classes during the holidays understanding.” She doesn’t think too.” If Matt had to pay the the rising fees will make students increased fees, he would want study harder saying currently the to know exactly how his extra £3,000 a year “rarely crosses their £6,000 is being spent and see minds,” herself included. the benefits.

NO Charlotte Allenby, Amy Gilmour & Holly Papps, English with Creative Writing: Sport Science: Charlotte feels the mediocre Ranking 38 on the Guardian’s place of 38 for English is deserved. league tables, Sport Science has Despite the course having a 77 per deemed unsatisfactory for Amy and cent satisfaction score, she feels Holly. Despite Brunel being their there is room for improvement. first choice they are two of the 35.9 The main reason Charlotte per cent of students that are not wouldn’t pay the £9,000 tuition fees is because she feels “there‘s not enough teacher-pupil time” per week, “I wouldn’t pay £9,000 I wouldn’t pay £9,000 for for 6 hours a week.” She is also annoyed when lectures are spent 6 hours a week. watching a film or going through the module guides because “we can do this in our own time.” Because of the hefty fees, she also says “I think that your first year completely satisfied with the course. should count towards your degree Although they love Brunel’s sporting because it is a lot of money for facilities and London location, they a just practise year.” Brunel was both agree they would not pay the Charlotte’s first choice because higher costs because they “only ever of the enthusiastic lecturers, and have approximately 4/6 hours a she loves that Brunel is a campus week contact time.” Because of this, university and all the facilities they feel their course is not worth are available on site. But despite the money they pay now, and more a refurbishment costing almost lectures and seminars would be an one million pounds, she says the improvement. Amy believes the library is unsatisfactory because rising fees are a bad thing, especially many of the computers are for them as careers in the health frequently broken. Charlotte is and fitness industry start with a adamant that the rise in fees is a salary of approximately £20,000. bad thing, but thinks it will make However, they both think they will students study harder because of improve students studying attitude the money it is costing them. so their costly qualification is “more worthwhile”.

Uni - is it all worth it? I have been here too damn long. Ben Moxey “Hands off my Education!” was one. “F**k fees” was another (yes it was written with asterisks – like a child). All signs at the Demo 2010 in which thousands of students, and a couple Socialist douche-hats, marched through London to protest the fees rising. Many shouted “Where’s my value for money?” and “Bollocks to Clegg” and the first statement got me thinking (the second is just fine). Where is the value for money in going to university? Let’s take Brunel as an example. You pay near-as-dammit £3,000 a year. And with fees set to rise to a nose-shattering £9,000 next year are you getting that value for money that we all crave in this consumer world we live in? Firstly let’s look at the cash coming in: Brunel takes in £64m a year in tuition fees. It then gets a further £57.5m in Grants and then an extra £46.7m in Research returns and Catering/Residences/ etc. So for those counting along that’s £169.5m in the bank – all to spend on you, the people. So where does it all go? Like most places 50% of it is taken by staffing wages and pensions and the like. 56% to be precise, that’s £90.9m. And in fairness, £2.71m is gobbled

up by 21 of the higher paid staff, including the Vice Chancellor. So the remaining £88m makes the average staff salary around £35k. After Staffing comes the mysterious ‘Other’ column. This takes up most of the remaining cash with £55.8m spent on ‘other’. But what is ‘other’? Usually most people use ‘other’ like they use ‘misc’ meaning ‘I-forgot-what-Ispent-this-on’. Thankfully the Uni

There is the mighty Students’ Union which is, frankly, a steal at £964k last year. accounts are better than mine... £14m on academic departments (the facilities to be taught in); £6m on services (more on this in a second); £2m on contracts (cleaning, gardening et al); £7m on residences (I think they have paid off Chepstow years ago); £12m on premises (what you see before you); £8m on admin (pens, papers, computers, etc) and £2m of the other is on...other. Go figure. So that’s £10,068 spent per student. Still don’t feel you get that value? Especially if you are

an Arts student? Well, let’s look at services. This £6m includes the Library and its 24-hour capabilities. It also includes the 622 computers available in the Library, John Crank and Halsbury – many of which are 24 hour – as well as the computers in Towers A and C for the engineering students and the Mac lab in Tower C for the designers. It also provides for the 4 counsellors who are free of charge and the 5 chaplains of many faiths for whatever floats your religious boat. Then there is the mighty Student’s Union which is, frankly, a steal at £964k last year. These guys provide all the Sports and Societies, the ARC, Student Media, RAG and Locos and Academy. Finally the Brunel Volunteers and the Placement and Careers Centre (PCC). That’s quite a bit for only £6m. And as a guide – to run a Job Centre in Deptford High Street (nearest thing to the PCC) costs £2.2m a year. So are you getting value for money from your University? No. Can you get value for money from your university? Yes. If you use the Library, if you use the bars, if you use the 24-hour Computer facilities. Your contact time with your lecturer is not the only facet to your life at this Uni. And it won’t bring you fiscal happiness. You (and those students after you) have to get your money’s worth out of the Uni! Recyclers in the house tonight.

Kamil Kurnikoff With Brunel’s rising fees, is it really worth it? And when the fees rise and the number of students drop and the funding cuts come in, then the universities will have to drop services. Universities up and down the land will lose computers; will lose staff; will lose libraries and will lose student’s unions. And who will be to blame? Who wasn’t there telling the politicians what we wanted in a coherent and calm voice? Who has spent the last 10 years bickering amongst themselves, trying to brown-nose the politicians to get a job? Who has seen fees double THEN triple during my time at university? The

NUS. The NUS has failed on all accounts to protect you and your rights. And all to the tune of £50k per year per institution. So when they protest again and you think of writing “Oi! Uni! Where’s my value for money?” maybe you should write “Oi! NUS! Where’s my value for money?” instead. Or just vote ‘No’ to the NUS in the campus-wide Referendum next year. All figures taken from the University’s accounts dated 200910, approved by Council.

October 2011 - Le Nurb


I’m out of recycling, set me free. Let me out of this misery.

Le Nurb - October 2011


nus delegate CRAIG BEST - Your VOTE = CHANGE As your VP Academic Representation this year, I represent your views at Brunel. Let my Experience, Passion and Drive steer change at the NUS conference. Your VOTE gives me the VOTE for you. CRAIG BEST for *

MIRIAM BANDERA - DRIVEN, COMMITED & PASSIONATE ABOUT STUDENT VOICE AT BRUNEL Having been part of the School Assembly, Campaigns Team and Elections & Referendum Committee I am knowledgeable about the UBS to be able to represent our union at the NUS conference.

OHENEWAA ADU-AKEYAMPONG - I believe that I am the best candidate to represent my fellow students because I can express myself clearly and listen effectively. I am able to promote the interests of the Students. I am honest and able to work well *

PETER SMALLWOOD - A STRONGER VOICE FOR BRUNEL! Other universities have a stronger voice on the NUS. Why should we let others control Brunel? I will stand up and fight for Brunel! VOTE PETER SMALLWOOD #1 (FIGHT FOR BRUNEL)

school student assembly member

HUGH FROST WELLINGS (Arts) - I am Hugh and I’m the treasurer of Drama Society. I am constantly involved within the School of Arts. On the assembly I hope to represent Arts across the whole of Campus!

ROBERT DAVILL (Business) - Please support me for Student Assembly in the Business School. I want to make a real difference in my final year at Brunel. Hope i can do it with your support.

ADAM JOY (Engineering & Design) - I want to stand for the School of Design and Engineering because I believe it can have a positive impact on the Union. I will be a strong voice for the all the Students in getting them the best deal *

JACK DUFFIN (ISC & Maths) - I am committed to improving the way the Union is run and making it more efficient so that it benefits ALL students as much as possible. I will also strive to assist and support students from the school of DISC *

KYRAS SUNGHUTEE (ISC & Maths) - I want to be an assembly member for mathematics because I believe that I can represent my colleagues and help to implement changes that we, as students, both want and need in our education at Brunel.

CAITLIN BOYDON-JONES (Law) - The School of Law is challenging and inspiring for students. I have an ambition to be a Lawyer. I want to be a strong voice for all Law students on the Student Assembly. Vote for me I won’t let you *

MIRIAM BANDERA (Law) This candidate did not submit a Le Nurb statement.

OLIVIA LINDBLOM (Social Sciences) - I wish to stand for the position of Social science representative on the student assembly. I feel that I will be able to inject energy into the role and that I am able to represent and project the views of *

XENIA COUDRILLE (Social Sciences) - You might remember that I ran for VP Academic Rep in May. I got loads of support which I really didn’t expect - so, thank you - it would be great if you could do it again! Please vote Xenia *

community assembly member ALEC BEESON - A straight talking, beer swilling, steak eating gentleman from the deep south...of Surrey. I believe our elected officials should be held to account: their actions scrutinized, their fantasies held in check and their manifestos accounted for.

Just the way you recycle.

ALEX LEE HURST - My name is Alex Lee-Hurst, I am hardworking dedicated individual who is committed to representing the views of YOU the students. Voting for me, is a step in the right direction for a positive transformation of YOUR student union.

October 2011 - Le Nurb


community assembly member (continued) ANDREW BAKER - Hi , I am a 2nd year Economics & Management student, I am the Entrepreneur Society President and was heavily involved in this year student elections. I want to be more actively involved in the union and the decisions it *

ANTHONY DE SOUSA - Do you want more events during weekends? Get to meet more people easily? More seminars and less lectures? Vote for TONY. I will improve your quality of life at Brunel and represent YOU like you deserve to be.

BEN MOXEY - Try as I might I’m still here. Sigh...

BRENDAN COGAN - I’m Brendan, I’m a second year on level 1 Computer Systems Engineering. I was a member of the Assembly last year, and was made Vice Chair. This year I hope to do even more, and make Brunel even better.

CONOR CHURCHILL - Hey I’m Conor and I am a Fresher. I am an active member of Brunel Rugby and Lacrosse. I want to get on the Assembly to help get more money for our sports team. So give me your vote Brunel *

DAVID KIRKPATRICK - Being able to address important and topical issues is what matters most when being a Community Assembly Member. I plan on addressing parking and transport matters, as well as voting favourably on changes that will benefit the student community.

EDWARD BURNELL - This position requires professionalism and responsibility. Before university I spent 3 years in industry where I programmed flight simulators, giving me a different set of skills and a fresh mind-set. We’re the next generation of adults - we decide what *

EMMA I’ANSON - Hi I’m Emmy. I am a passionate and confident student who has worked within the Union for the past two years as a Contact and Head Contact for Freshers’ week. I feel that with my knowledge and experience so far *

EZGI AGARSU - “Be the change you wish to see…” …I’m Co-Chair of People and Planet Society and campaign closely with students and SUs from universities across the UK. I always work towards a community we can be proud of and will carry *

GEORGINA WHING - Hey! My name is Georgie and I want to be your next Community Assembly Member. I am new to Brunel and want to make an instant impact within the Union. Vote for me and let’s have a good time!

HARRY MACMANUS - How awesome is Brunel? I love this place! In Fresher’s week I was the guy who dislocated my shoulder and had a sling on all week, due to falling over at Hockey! Now I am injured I better do something!

JAMES KHODABANDEHLOO - As a member of the union I will be representing you and your views inside the Union. I consider myself to have an open and flexible mind and I believe I can represent your views in the Union effectively. YOU *

JAYD WILLIAMS - Hiya, I’m Jayd Williams a second year law student and an active member of Brunel’s law society. I will be running for student assembly, I’m passionate and self motivated and ready to give back to the union. Vote for me!

JOCELYN BAFFOUR - Hi all! My name is Jocelyn Baffour. I’m a mathematics student on a mission to play an active role in bettering Brunel University, so that we students can get the most out of our time here, as well as pave *

JOSHUA DIXON This candidate did not submit a Le Nurb statement.

LIAM WALPOLE - ‘ACCOUNTABILITY - AUDIBILITY - ACT FOR YOU ABILITY’ Being on the Assembly is a way of giving a voice to the Students at Brunel, it is an opportunity to Act for the Students, keep the Union Accountable to You, and *

MARTIN ZARANIYIKA - I am someone who is a true believer in Brunel’s full potential. Every student has the ability to excel, but they can only do so if certain conditions are met. Therefore, if elected, my main priority would be setting up *

MOHAMMAD KHAN - Hi, My names Mohammad Khan and I am a final year student. I’ve been involved with the union as the Nus Delegate and am current the Secretary of the Pakistani Society. These roles that I have been involved in have *

OHENEWAA ADU-AKEYAMPONG - I believe that I am the best candidate to represent my fellow students because I can express myself clearly and listen effectively. I am able to hold the Union to account and promote the interests of the Students. I am *

PETER SMALLWOOD - To quote Barack Obama we need “Change” in our union. Stronger leadership and more purpose and direction. I will fight to keep the 24 hour library, improve the nightlife and make sure clubs and societies have more money to spend.

SOPHIE LOVE - I am a first year Politics student. I am keen to get more involved in my Union. I want to work closely with assembly to improve the Nightlife at Brunel.

All candidates whose Le Nurb statements exceeded 40 words have had them cut at the 40-word mark in order to ensure fairness. Those that have been truncated are marked with a star (*). Any candidate that did not provide a photo has the Elections lightning bolt logo next to their statement. All statements are printed exactly as submitted, including any spelling and grammar mistakes.

Recycling: all my troubles seemed so far away.

Le Nurb - October 2011


Online at

It’s recycling. Hallelujah.

October 2011 - Le Nurb


You know you love Gossip Girl... Emma I’Anson I don’t know about all you beautiful ladies out there, but I am a huge Gossip Girl fan. While browsing the good old Internet the other week, I came across the photos for the upcoming season fashion for the cast and I squealed in excitement. From the photos popping up all over blogs, and having already seen the first few episodes, I can say that the stylist team behind Gossip Girl are doing an amazing job, as per usual. The blonde beauty Serena Van Der Woodson (Blake Lively) can be seen wearing an array of beach-chic outfits, including a pink and yellow wrap dress and a red maxi skirt, which both look drop dead gorgeous and are a must-have for next summer. Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester) never ceases to amaze me with her flawless looks, and this upcoming season is no different.

Her style is poised and impeccably put together, with a selection of high-waisted trousers, beautiful floral vests, and her statement structured, styled dresses; so Blair is looking like her usual classic, polished self. Designers to be included in Gossip Girl season 5 are Valentino, Dolce and Gabbana, Matthew Williamson, Rag and Bone, and Mike Gonzalez (to name a few.) I also can’t forget to add that the gorgeous Serena had some beautiful arm candy, including a Louis Vuitton patent leather handbag. I go weak at the knees for stunning designer handbags, so I can tell that this season is going to be a hit for me. The Gossip Girl-inspired range is set to feature dresses, trousers, tops, handbags, and accessories priced from £50-£150. The clothes may be based overseas in America; however, you can purchase them

online from, bluefly. com and “Gossip Girl took the fashion world by storm when it debuted four years ago on The CW Network, and as the series prepares to enter its fifth season and approaches the 100-episode milestone, its looks remain as relevant and iconic as ever,” said Sonia Borris, Senior Vice President, Marketing & Operations, Warner Bros. Worldwide Television Marketing. “If you are a fan of the series or have the urge to unlock your inner fashionista, this new line by Romeo & Juliet Couture will satisfy, no matter which character’s look you love and identify with.” The collection is being released alongside the season five premiere, and from the previews on the Romeo and Juliet Couture website, the collection designs are beautiful, well made and versatile.

Reinventing the Net? Lewis Sluman When browsing the Internet recently, I went onto the YouTube homepage and stumbled across a link to a live festival happening in Austin, Texas. The Austin City Limits festival this year included the likes of Coldplay, Kanye West, Stevie Wonder and Arcade Fire. Although these live stream concerts have been on YouTube for a couple of years now (the first being U2 at the Rose Bowl in 2009), I feel that only now it has become something more real. Not just a one-time gimmick, but also something that could actually progress and move the music industry forward and become a more regular feature. It provided me with a live stream of the concert and two different ‘channels’ (representing stages) to choose from with the appropriate listings alongside. This was the first time I had ever

come across something like this, and I must say it was amazing. The video stream loaded in seconds and didn’t buffer once (to my knowledge, my Internet connection is average). The quality of sound was perfect as I was watching City & Colour, and it seriously didn’t feel any different from quality edited TV footage. At the bottom of the screen was a Twitter and Facebook feed so I could see what everyone was saying about the festival right that second. If I wanted to, I could do the same. It may or might not sound like too much, but I was able to access a festival on the other side of the world, live – a festival I have never heard of before, to see some acts I have definitely heard of. It showed to me just how far the Internet and music have come, with the possibility of millions watching one live

performance across the globe. That feat is staggering in reality. Since then, the Rock In Rio festival was also available for streaming, another festival I had never heard of before but featured more coveted acts. Imagine if UK festivals such as Reading & Leeds and Glastonbury were streamed live on YouTube all day. Instead of having to wait for an edited version of highlights, which only show one song by bands that aren’t considered worthy of the one hour TV slots that the headline or sub-headline acts get on BBC3. Surely this would only increase the possible revenue and audience, an improvement to which all bands would approve of. The more the better. The best thing about watching it live is that I didn’t miss a single thing, as there were no adverts. Mindi Bond

The CW ???

The Gossip Girl cast.

Guilty pleasures, Your Honour Lewis Sluman Pokémon Theme Tune You might be reading this thinking that Pokémon was lame, but you’d be wrong. I can prove that by saying, “I want to be the very best, like no one ever was,” and suddenly the whole Pokémon universe comes flooding back. God I love the 90’s.

Five – Everybody Get Up Another trip back to the 90’s sees our teenage memories call upon the all-dancing, all-rapping boyband Five and their monster hit Everybody Get Up. Everyone knows this is the ultimate song to end an extremely late night out at Liquid. Take That – Never Forget Take That have plenty of songs that could fall into this category, but an exceptionally loud chorus of “never forget where you’re coming from!” simply cannot be beaten. “Never Forget” that. Bonnie Tyler – I Need A Hero This song instantly has you running and racing around the room, or at least I hope you all do. It’s full of 80’s beats and loud drum clap type noises (how can you possibly describe the noise?). It never lets up. Steps – 5,6,7,8 I would expect all of Brunel to not just know most of the words to this absolute classic but the dance moves too. The official finger pointing, twirling dance moves. Imagine the carnage to this song on a cowboy themed night out. Wow.

Austin City Limits music festival. You’ve gotta fight for your right to recycle.

Le Nurb - October 2011


When it comes to The Big Bang Theory, I’m a creationist Viorel Vlad Season 5 of The Big Bang Theory kicked off the other week with its premiere gathering an audience of over 14 million American ratings. In 2010, it became the highest rated comedy on TV, dethroning Two and a Half Men, the infamous show fathered by the same creator, Chuck Lorre. In the very unlikely case you’ve never watched TBBT, it is a sitcom about a group of 4 young male scientists and their actresswannabe, currently-waitress girl next door. I, like many others living in the UK, watched the premiere. I, unlike many others living anywhere in world, didn’t even smile once during the whole thing. Let’s get one thing straight: I watched TBBT from Day One and I actually found the first season funny. Sure, it relied heavily on outdated stereotypes, but some of the scenarios were amusing and the jokes were OK. The second season wasn’t that great, but I continued to watch, just like I used to do with all the TV shows that I started, thinking it will find its bearings eventually. The third season was disastrous and the fourth was even worse. They recycled the same situations, jokes, and character quirks until the point I wasn’t sure if I was watching a new episode or a re-run. But my main problem with it was the way the stereotyped, educated; young males with an interest in science who possess above average intelligence (I’ll try to refrain from using the term “nerds”) are subjected to these situations.

In the show’s universe, social skills and smart people don’t mix. Scientists simply lack any common sense. Highly intelligent men are automatically naive when it comes to interpersonal relationships. If you like comic books, you’ve never kissed a girl in your life. On the other

hand, if you failed science in high school you probably had a number of successful relationships. Can’t understand what mathematics is good for? You can solve everyday problems like a mathematician never will. I’m a scientist (in training, at

least). If you’ll excuse my lack of modesty, I’ll just put this out there; my intelligence is above average. I read a lot. I have developed somewhat encyclopedic knowledge over the years and I can easily be arrogant about it. I love sci-fi. And yes, I have a favourite comic



The cast of The Big Bang Theory.

Tinker, Tailor, Soldier, Spy REVIEW DIRECTOR

Tomas Alfredson WRITER

Bridget O’Connor CAST

Gary Oldman, John Hurt, Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, Benedict Cumberbatch, Toby Jones, Mark Strong

Tinker Tailor Soldier’s Spy’s cinema poster.

book series. That’s about where my similarities with the leading characters of TBBT end, but you might very well think I dislike the show because I’m offended by it. Not at all. My point of contention with TBBT is that it is part of the general antiintellectual vibe that mass-media is currently harbouring. Intelligent men (and women, in the unlikely case they are depicted as being somewhat unattractive) are one of last cultural groups that can be openly ridiculed and singled out as different. Sure, in many TV shows, these aliens are somewhat positively depicted. Girls usually tell me that they love Sheldon and I’m tempted to say “Hey, I’m a hairier, stockier version of Sheldon with a sex drive and common sense who drinks rum by the bottle!” All of this may just seem like a pointless rant about a show I don’t like, but still watch when I should just change the channel, but the real life implications are more factual than you think. With every passing year, science and art funding all over the world gets cut when it should be increased. With every passing year, the fees for higher education surge upwards. We live in a time where there is great knowledge available for the masses, yet so many of us choose to remain ignorant. I can’t help but think that being told by the media, at least in subtext – that getting smarter will make you either unhappy or the laughing stock of society – has something to do with all of that.

Subat Bashir Featuring the crème de la crème of English actors, it is not difficult to see why Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy has been one of the most anticipated films of the year. With an ensemble cast including Gary Oldman, John Hurt, Colin Firth, Tom Hardy, Benedict Cumberbatch, Toby Jones, and Mark Strong, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy is like a master class in acting. As each of these thespians manage to step out of the shadows and make their presence known throughout the film. However for all the high expectations this film roused, it was not immune to criticism. The naysayers were loud and clear in their belief that Oldman could not rival Sir Alec Guiness in the role of Smiley. Whilst fans

of John le Carre’s original novel remained sceptical that screenplay writer Bridget O’Connor could successfully condense the spy novel in to a two-hour feature film. Set during the Cold War, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy kicks of to a chilling start as Control (John Hurt), the head of MI6, reveals his suspicions of a Russian mole to agent Jim Prideaux (Mark Strong). Armed with this new information, Prideaux is sent to Budapest to meet with a Hungarian general about the Russian double agent. However the operation is brought to a halting stop when Prideaux is shot and presumably killed by Soviet intelligence. From this point, the film assumes a slower pace, as George Smiley, a former MI6 intelligence officer, is coaxed out of retirement to take over the investigation and track down the mole. With Peter Gilliam (Benedict Cumberbatch), a current employee of The Circus (MI6), as his only ally, Smiley must approach his former colleagues and friends as suspects, and come to terms with the fact that he has also been betrayed.

Should I give up, or should I just keep recycling papers?

Much has been made of Oldman’s performance as George Smiley, with many critics claiming this would be the role to finally win him an Oscar. Oldman’s performance was carefully crafted and beautifully nuanced. Smiley being an acutely silent and observant character, Oldman’s dialogue was extremely limited and the conflicting emotions he experiences throughout the film were silently conveyed. Equally impressive was Mark Strong, and Tom Hardy, who gives an emotionally charged performance as Agent Rick Tarr. VERDICT A slow-burning film that requires the viewers’ complete attention. It’s easy for the viewer to get lost in the fluid flashbacks and sudden scene-jumps. However if you stick with it (and perhaps give it a second viewing) you will be swept away in the sheer detail and intricacy of the plot. If nothing else, Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy is definitely worth a view for the superlative acting and beautiful cinematography. 88888

October 2011 - Le Nurb


Dear photograph... Chrissie Gomez We all have a past. A past that contains some of our greatest memories such as our first birthday, our grandfather dancing with his dog, or our embarrassing drunk moments that we don’t remember but, of course, our friends do. We utilize a certain picture to help us relive those memories. Those are our dear photographs. We stick them into photo albums, onto our bedroom walls, or even post them to our Facebook pages. But what if I told you that you can create art from these old vintage photos? What if I told you that art doesn’t necessarily have to come from the likes of the great Van Gogh or Picasso. In fact, art is all around you, presenting the world’s beauty and what we can make of it. So dig out the old photographs you forgot you had and try this: Go to the exact location where your photograph was taken (or somewhere similar looking. It’s more nostalgic if you go to the real location though). Hold the photograph up to match the background of the location.

Take a picture of the old photograph in the present moment. If you did it right, it should look something like the photo on the right. Simple, right? When you’re happy with it, don’t be afraid to show it off at They love new and innovative submissions, but I realized that the site is lacking a cultural quality. After looking at a few photos, it seemed that they are only receiving submissions from most parts of North America. This is a website definitely worth paying attention to. We live in a multicultural society where many are interested to see the places different people grew up in. Better yet, there are international students living among us here at Brunel, and I’m sure they are bound to have many stories about their home countries and cultural backgrounds. And we all know what better way to tell the story then through using pictures. It is worth a thousand words, right? So what are you waiting for? Grab your old photos and camera and have fun snapping and reminiscing!

Chrissie Gomez

Photo of my uncle, grandmother and cousins at Lunetta Park, the Philippines, in 1994.

The latest in theatre Daisy Adamson The world of theatre is one that is always fast-paced and up-to-date. Here’s all the hot new theatre news for you to tune in to. Thriller, the musical playing the music of global superstar, Michael Jackson, is launching a campaign on Facebook to find the new stars of the next West End production. The show, which will be touring the world in addition to London performances, is looking for dancers aged 18-25 to upload a video of them dancing to Facebook where it can be voted on by the public. The 15 most highlyrated dancers will have the chance to perform in front of the show’s choreographer and director, Gary Lloyd, for a chance to win a place in the cast of the show. Videos can be uploaded to the “Thriller Live” Facebook page from the 13th October until 17th November. Marti Pellow, the singer and songwriter from band Wet Wet Wet is set to join the cast of West End Musical Blood Brothers. The singer, fresh from an eight-monthlong UK tour of Jekyll and Hyde, will play the narrator in Willy Russell’s classic, telling the story of two boys separated at birth who are later reunited. The show will launch in the Phoenix Theatre on the 1st November this year. Lauren Samuels, who came in third on Over the Rainbow, Andrew Lloyd Webber’s talent show to find a girl to play the part of Dorothy in The Wizard of Oz, is joining the cast of We Will Rock You. Also joining Miss Samuels will be Alasdair Harvey (who was previously in The Phantom of the Opera and Les Miserables) and Wayne Robinson, who was

previously in the touring version of the same show. The musical, featuring the iconic music from band Queen, tells the story of a world where rock music is banned. Starting on the 10th October at London’s Dominion theatre, the show will run until October 2012. A new musical showing in London is hosting a gala performance night to raise money for Children in Need. Rock of Ages opened last week at the Shaftsbury Theatre, London. All proceeds from the gala night of the musical, which features classic songs such as “We Built This City”, “The Final Countdown” and Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believing”,

will be donated to the charity. The story, set in 1980’s L.A., plays host to big hair and mullets, representing the era whilst telling the classic boy-meets-girl love story. Cast members include: Shayne Ward, Justin Lee Colins, and Simon Lipkin. TV presenters Tony Blackburn, Vanessa Feltz, and Gaby Roslin will all be present as well. The special performance will happen on the 16th November along with a raffle and on the night donations. Rock of Ages hopes to beat last year’s Children in Need production – Jersey Boys, which raised a massive £60,000 for the charity.

Google to aid innovation at Silicon Roundabout John Keogh

Old Street roundabout advertising.

Thriller Live

Matt Smith The government’s plans for a London Tech City were boosted when Google announced that it would be opening a centre in 2012. The company obtained a building in the Old Street area, with a view to assist the capital’s small technology companies. It has seven floors, which will be used as a training centre for new and innovative groups looking to set up their own ventures. David Singleton, Google’s UK engineering director, said: “We hope to announce more details about the organisations we’ll work with and how they will use the space in the coming months. “East London is already home to hundreds of innovative British start-ups and has huge potential for economic growth and new jobs.” Google are one of several companies who vowed to support

A Thriller Live performance. We could have had it all, rolling in the recycling.

the government’s £400 million investment in a London rival to Silicon Valley. Chancellor George Osborne said: “It shows that we can create the right environment to attract startups and established high-technology businesses. This shows that Britain is open for high-tech business.” However, Prime Minister David Cameron’s scheme was dealt a blow recently when social networking giant Twitter decided to open a new office in Dublin rather than London. In November, the Prime Minister said: “Help to create the right framework, so it’s easier for new companies to start up, for venture capital firms to invest, for innovations to flourish, for businesses to grow.” Google expects its centre to open to the public in 2012, following a renovation of the East London building.

Le Nurb - October 2011



Top games for students: the definitive guide Aaron Brown Being a student is great – choosing what to eat, living with friends and coming home in the small hours of the morning (or not at all) is the life

many of us know. However, money can be tight for students, and this rules out splashing out on the latest video games. As a result here are the Top Five Video Games for

Students. They are the best. They are cheap. They are must-plays between now and the end of your degree.


PC/Mac/PS3/Xbox 360 - RRP £18 The long-awaited sequel to Portal (awarded 2007’s Game of the Year) is a puzzling first-person adventure like no other. The aim of the game is fire “portals” from a modified gun, which the player can then travel through to access new areas and defeat the brain-boiling puzzles. Initially a simple concept, the game increases the difficulty at a fast pace, and new methods of gameplay are constantly introduced to keep the levels fresh and exciting. Stephen Merchant lends his voice to a small robot named Wheatley, who provides genuinely hilarious commentary and sarcastic comments as you advance through the game on your own or in the cooperative story.

VERDICTS Gamespot:




4. DEAD SPACE 2 PC/PS3/Xbox 360 - RRP £12

The original Dead Space arrived with very little hype, yet successfully brought back the survival/horror genre and the sequel improves on its predecessor in every possible way. The game is a mix between Resident Evil 4 and the film Alien and must be played in the dark with the speakers turned up. You play as Isaac Clarke, an engineer who must creep and fight his way through the enormous infested spaceship he awakes on to destroy the Marker, a mysterious piece of alien technology which plagues Isaac with demonic visions of his past. The atmosphere is constantly tense, with lights flickering and distant screams echoing around the abandoned ship. You must be brave and conservative with ammo if you wish to survive this incredible game.

Ricky Compton FIFA had an awkward run a few years back with competitor Pro Evolution Soccer, but it now appears to have firmly regained its stranglehold on the football game market. This hold is so great so that even I, a non-football-gameplayer, picked it up on release day to give it a try. FIFA 12 is a true testament to how the upgrades in a yearly released sports game should work. The mechanics are all better tuned, there’s more realistic player movement, and play works seamlessly as it never has before... or so they say. For someone who hasn’t played a new football game for a couple of years (PES 10, if anyone can remember back that far), FIFA 12 is truly punishing, with a mixture of newer, more complicated defences and just the sheer skill of AI opponents at any level. I considered myself a World Class player on a few games back in the day, but on FIFA 12 I struggle on

the Professional difficulty to hold a lead. Despite my lack of skill, I still had great fun playing the game. I’ve built and played with a FIFA 12 Ultimate Team, as well as toying around with Career mode. The latter of which gives you the option to be a Player, Manager or Player Manager, and all of them work well; the transfer system is better and more refined. I did doubt the lack of an instruction manual with the game when it came to things such as player development and skill moves, but FIFA 12 appears to run on a “pick it up as you go along” ethos.

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consernatet essit rest fuga. Nulloriorat quo con escide nus, susandi ducid magnatur? Met aut velecaesecto velecto officim enempor eperrum ut doluptur sam quas evendae nam volor rem et eium asperum vitaquis el ma sum is ipsundiate vit presti te nia eturepernam Le Nurb simus accepts doluptus. submissions Ad ulpa sim from que num any Brunel verro tem natibustia student. See corehentiunt page 2 to find perum volorem out how quam, to get involved! consed quunt odictur abo. Nem. Vid que officina

Could you fill this space? ut que nos venihilitis et esequiatis beaquiatem ea cus, sequiam est volupti anturepel ipsanimus pro explani eturiae stibustia sequid estiani od ulparunt inctes et archit ut aliquae omni quunt, sequid ut esequi cum volorestem il ium ipsati

VERDICT FIFA 12 is a truly entertaining game, but not as approachable as new players may expect without sucking up their pride and starting on Semi-Pro. 88888

VERDICTS Gamespot:





Ever wondered who would win in a fight between Mario, Sonic and Link? Find out in Super Smash Bros. Brawl, the third in the Smash Bros. series by Nintendo. It is the first instalment which features third-party characters. With 35 fighters, a 16-hour single player/co-operative adventure, online and local multiplayer as well as a stage-creator, this game has enough features to last well into its 100th hour of game-play. The game is easy to pick up, with your novice friends being able to fight using just one button; however, despite these initially simplistic controls, the game is near impossible to truly master. Famitsu magazine, known for being one of the harshest in the industry, has gifted only 15 games full-marks, and Super Smash Bros. Brawl is one of them.

VERDICTS Gamespot:




2. CALL OF DUTY 4 PC/PS3/Xbox 360/Wii - RRP £12

The Call of Duty series has become one of the biggest selling video game franchises of all time, with global hysteria and midnight launches worldwide for the release of each instalment. This was the game that kickstarted that hysteria – and for good reason. With an intense campaign and a frantic online multiplayer this is the very definition of a good first person shooter, and as a result every subsequent addition to the genre is compared against this landmark game.

VERDICTS Gamespot:






Wii - RRP £18

This is Mario’s finest hour. Taking the platforming genre into outer space and allowing players to experiment with gravity introduces an entirely new angle to the franchise. Narrowly missing out on a perfect score from Famitsu magazine, the game received a BAFTA in 2007 for its innovative gameplay. Using the Wii’s motion controls – and with optional help from a second player – you must navigate multiple galaxies to obtain a star, of which there are 120 to collect. The boss battles are original, the levels are both intricately designed and enjoyable, and the soundtrack is fantastic. The game is simply not to be missed.

Promise this, if I recycle before I wake.

VERDICTS Gamespot:




October 2011 - Le Nurb


Enhance Your Skills!

Join Brunel Super U on Facebook* Tell us what your favourite superpower would be. (e.g. the ability to teleport tea using your mind)

And the winner will have our illustrator draw it for you.

* Sticks and stones may break my bones but recycling excites me.

Le Nurb - October 2011


We’re back on air (and even more awesome) Tom Scott It’s well known that BBC Radio 2 breakfast DJ Chris Evans began his radio career at the very, very bottom and worked his way to the top. He used to work for free at countless radio stations, including hospital radio and local community radio stations, whilst he worked at a newsagents till 5am delivering papers in order to pay for food and warmth. Then again this was the 1980s and things have slightly changed since then. Radio Brunel is once again kick starting another year of broadcasting, not only on campus but all around the UK. This is my 4th year as a part of Radio Brunel and I have seen the radio station develop into something that the union, the university and most importantly the students can be proud of.

We have been inundated with applicatants and a tremendous amount of interest shown throughout campus that really makes the work the volunteers do behind the scene worth while. Being a part of Radio Brunel is most certainly a way to kick start a career in broadcasting so if you don’t fancy having a newspaper round like Chris Evans, joining the station is a perfect way to get ready for the big leagues of radio. We are really looking for a lot of student support this year in order to help the radio station grow. Not only by being on air or behind the scenes but by listening. The station always needs an audience so we are always encouraging students to listen, whether it’s your mates having their own show or if you fancy listening to something

new, go online and listen or sit in the atrium listening to the precious speaker. Radio Brunel is all about personality. We have a huge range of shows for you to listen to each and every day from poetry to politics and from banter to Sndra bullocks, check out our timetable below and all our top shows as well. Radio Brunel seems to be getting bigger and bigger every year. Soon Chris Evans will want his own Radio Brunel show. LISTEN LIVE Listen live to our awesome new shows as well as the old classics on the website:










Rockeando en Espanol

Zeeno’s jam


Erin’s Everything

Roc Soc Radio

Tall, Short and Ginger

Don’t Panic

Nightmare on Nine Elms


Radio Lols

It’s Good To Talk



Shooting Holes

Flava in Your Ear

Audio Kings

Smash Up




The Eclectic Show


The Early Evening Show

Tom Scott and Josh

Live In the Tr3house

No Paradise


Chicken Brunel

Molly’s Fun Time


Jazz Hour




Surge Protected


Eaves Drop

The Niche

Brunel Questions



Dance Brunel Dance

Brunel ACS


Radio Brunel out and about on campus in Freshers’ Week Tom Scott I reckon that no one noticed but Radio Brunel was everywhere during Freshers Week. If you did then pat on the back for you. Radio Brunel was both in the Quad each and every day but was also playing a huge part in the Freshers Fayre. Now I bet you’re reading that going, oh that was ages ago, but the Radio Brunel team not only had a stall there but was responsible for the music you heard over the speakers. Our team kept you entertained all day and didn’t take a break till you were happy. Freshers Week

was themed around the 1990’s so it seemed a perfect fit that Radio Brunel had the chance to play 1990’s music all week. The amount of times we saw people arm in arm spinning around to Cotton Eye Joe or doing the Macarena was pretty awesome. Radio Brunel is also planning on being there during other major union and university events. Already lined up is Radio Brunel at The Fireworks and Radio Brunel at RAG Week where were once again attempt our 120 hour broadcast throughout the entire week.

There is also high hopes of getting Radio Brunel played and broadcasting during next years Varsity at St. Mary’s as well as plenty of other events throughout the year. Radio Brunel will always be there even when you don’t expect it. FIND OUT MORE Keep up to date with all of Radio Brunel events by liking our page on Facebook: Make me recycle like a freak.

October 2011 - Le Nurb


This month’s featured shows

dance, brunel, dance 3guys1mic fridays 7-9pm

thursdays 9-11pm


the niche

tom scott and josh

Jamie Craven hosts the best dance show on Radio Brunel, the perfect way to prepare for an awesome night out. Tons of new and popular music to get you in the mood for whatever evening festivities you have planned.

Now Radio Brunel’s number 1 entertainment show, these three friends began 3guys1mic with the hope of fame and fortune. Tune in every week to hear ridiculous banter, top music and classic features like Our House, Animal Showdown and James’ 45-second Audioplay.

JPV is Radio Brunel’s number one show for top scientific banter. Jack and Vlad present two hours of biochemical nonsense, testing out their ridiculous theories and taking awesome to new limits. Check out this unmissable show for something seriously funny.

The Niche is Radio Brunel’s single best source for the best creative writing and poetry that Brunel has to offer. Hosted by Matt Smith, he will have different guests each week and amazing classic rock music to make this show an instant classic.

One of the longest running full time shows, Tom Scott And Josh enjoy witty banter, great music and the company of their many amusing mascots, like their carrier pigeon. One of the most natural shows from two guys who hope one day to become Jedward or at least a radio version.

brunel questions

it’s good to talk

audio kings


tall, short & ginger

Brunel Questions is Radio Brunel’s top political discussion show. Hosted by Ben Moxey and Alex “The Fedex” Mitchell, this show has featured many top politicians since its creation including London Mayoral candidate Ken Livingstone. With a packed schedule for the year, Brunel Questions will play host to plenty of topical debate, not only nationally but locally as well, and continue to provide Brunel students with top political guests.

Avina Patel, the Vice President of Community Welfare, continues to provide Brunel students with weekly support as she works with the Brunel Counseling Service to bring you ‘Its Good To Talk’. As she works with fellow UBS officers and licensed counsellors from the University itself, Its Good To Talk can provide students with help and support on various issues that affect students today including finance, welfare, relationships and adult life.

The Audio Kings are back after a one year hiatus to bring back their usual collection of entertainment and awesome music. The Audio Kings practically invented the word ‘banter’ and will be there each and every week to keep you entertained. These were the guys that had Radio Brunel’s first ever 24 hour charity show back in 2009 and want to rekindle that magic that made them so popular back then.

James Innes present Unsigned, Radio Brunel’s number 1 unsigned band show with guests each and every week from every corner of the UK. Fancy trying something new and discovering new music? Then Unsigned will provide you with the top unsigned bands live in the studio each week. This is the perfect show for someone who with a keen taste in music and style.

Back for a 5th fabulous year, Tall, Short and Ginger present their weekly stylings of witty banter and unimaginable nonsense. With such legendary features as the news at 6 (at 8), the Wiki Track and Alex’s unmissable film review, Tall, Short and Ginger are hoping to celebrate their 5th year with a bang and maybe some cheese.

fridays 2-3pm

tuesday 1-2pm

fridays 5-7pm

tuesdays 9-11pm

I really, really, really wanna recycle, aah.

thursdays 5-7pm

thursdays 7-9pm

wednesdays 9-11pm

monday 7-9pm

Le Nurb - October 2011



All the puzzles are tried and tested by the Le Nurb team, and you can see the fastest time next to each one. Your prize for beating us? A sense of smug satisfaction, and a warm, glowy feeling in your midriff.


Sudoku Hard


Difficulty: 55555

Difficulty: 55555

2 9



4 9


8 1

7 7







1 2

6 6








RHYS’S SCORE: 12 in 10 mins ROB’S SCORE: 11 in 10 mins











4 2




6 8

9 7

Bourne Identity Inception Monsters, Inc. The Room Charlie Emma James Rhys Rob Monday

Film Name










January 30

January 23

January 16

January 9

January 2 Avatar


ROB’S TIME: 22m 52s

Difficulty: 55555

Jess Watson decided to see five different films at the cinema with each of her friends. They went to see the movies during the first week of their respective releases, and each on different days. Determine the title and release date of each movie that Jess went to see, the day of the week that they went to see each movie, and the name of the friend who went with Jess each week.

Day of the Week





Ratings: 10-15 average

Clues 1. Avatar released on January 30th but Jess didn’t see it on a Thursday night. Rhys went with Jess on a Monday night but they didn’t see The Room. 2. Emma didn’t join Jess on a Wednesday night. Jess saw the movie that released on January 9th on a Friday night but not with James. 3. Monsters, Inc. came out a week after the movie that Jess saw with Emma but a week before the movie that Jess saw on a Thursday night. “WHAT?!” 4. Jess did not see the movie that released on January 16th on a Tuesday night. Not sure where to 5. Jess saw Inception before she went start? Read clue 1 with Charlie but two weeks after carefully - we’ve filled in everything it Bourne Identity. 6. James went to see the movie that tells you at first. released on January 2nd but not on a Wednesday night.

Release Date



1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 Crosslogic “What Shall Watson Watch?”

Difficulty: 55555 Find as many words as possible using letters from the grid. The words must be four letters or more, and contain the central letter, but each letter may not be used more than once. There is at least one word that uses all nine letters in the grid.

Friend Taken


16-20 good

21-25 excellent

26 godlike

Teasers 1. Which number should be written in the empty circle? 55555







7 2. Fill in the missing numbers. 55555









7 2



6 3. Which time completes the sequence? 55555 3:00, 7:01, 5:53, 9:27...

a. 9:59 c. 11:55

b. 12:02 d. 6:42

4. If the following are true: 3 screwdrivers, 4 hammers and 5 saws cost £9.70, 4 screwdrivers, 5 hammers and 3 saws cost £9, 5 screwdrivers, 3 hammers and 4 saws cost £8.90,

Wednesday Thursday much would you spend in total if you bought one of each item? 55555

Friday You hear the door slam, and realise there’s nowhere else to recycle.

October 2011 - Le Nurb


Horoscopes ARIES (March 21-April 20)

You have great personal energy today. Sadly you do not have great personal hygiene. Go wash.

TAURUS (April 21-May 21)

Life can be confusing, so try complex mathematics. Then your life will seem easier by comparison.

GEMINI (May 22-June 21)

Your desires are out in the open right now, and that is how it should be. No-one likes to keep their desires hidden away, no sir.

CANCER (June 22-July 22)

With the Moon at six fillipeters and Pluto at a low on the breastiburning scale, there is a chance you will be mauled.

LEO (July 23-August 22)

ROFL, LOL, RTFM. These are all terms you should stop using if you wish to make it in life.

VIRGO (August 23-September 21)

Libras are traditionally strong and fierce, but you aren’t. Grow a pair.

SCORPIO (October 23-November 21)

It has never been a better time to go into business. Especially showbusiness, because we all know there is no business like showbusiness. Like no business I know.

PLAY AND WIN! First correct submission sent to the Editor wins a free copy of Le Nurb. 1

Don’t change, you are god-like.

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 20)

Tests will arise in your lovelife, but don’t let them hold you back. Express your love to the person who you most desire. Who even reads those restraining orders, anyway?

AQUARIUS (January 21-February 19)

One must always take a Chance on life and happiness. Ensure though, that one does not collect a Community Chest and if you are bidden to go to Jail, then do not collect £200 and do not passeth ‘Go’.

PISCES (February 20-March 20)

Join the dots. Difficulty: 55555

Oh God! I can’t feel my arm, I can’t feel my arm! Its... oh wait, I was sitting on it.

LIBRA (September 22-October 22)

SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21)

Mensa Corner

Blub, blub, blub. That’s the noise a fish makes. 2



Overheard in the office this month... Avatar


January 30



January 23 January 16

Monsters, Inc.

January 9

Bourne Identity

January 2

The Room

Not sexual harrassment as in,

‘honka honka’. NO-ONE DRINKS COKE ZERO!

Film Name

Release Date










Day of the Week

Friend Taken


You weren’t here for Hitler.

egos, gels, gelt, gets, glop, glops, goes, gooey, goop, goose, gospel, gyps, legs, loge, loges, logo, logos, logotype, logotypes, logs, ogle, ogles, pegs, slog, stooge, togs.

10-15 16-20 21-25 26-00

average good excellent godlike


Sorry, I’m busy doing this

newspaper ting, innit? Medium Sudoku

4 9 6 1 5 7 8 3 2

7 2 5 3 8 9 6 4 1

1 8 3 6 4 2 7 5 9

6 1 2 5 7 8 4 9 3

3 7 9 4 6 1 2 8 5

5 4 8 2 9 3 1 6 7

2 5 4 7 3 6 9 1 8

9 3 7 8 1 4 5 2 6

8 6 1 9 2 5 3 7 4

1 4 2 3 6 7 5 8 9

5 3 9 8 1 2 4 7 6

6 8 7 5 9 4 1 3 2

3 9 1 4 2 6 7 5 8

7 5 6 1 3 8 9 2 4

4 2 8 7 5 9 3 6 1

9 1 3 2 8 5 6 4 7

2 7 5 6 4 1 8 9 3

8 6 4 9 7 3 2 1 5

4. £2.60.


Hard Sudoku

You’re grumpy! No,

you’re grumpy! (*Rob smacks head on table*)

Meow. More unmissable quotes next month.

Every day I’m recycling. Woowoowoo-woo-woo, woo!

3. A. If the separate digits in each time are added together, they increase by five with each step.

6 5

10 8


2. 13, 4, 15 and 9. All rows, columns and diagonals add to 34.



1. Two. The numbers along each line add to 15.


6 2



Le Nurb - October 2011


STD (Start throwing discs!) Dan Tanner When I mention to people that I play Ultimate Frisbee, the vast majority look at me as if I’m an escaped lunatic. The rest just stare blankly, as if trying to comprehend what I have just said. They will then usually make a comment about how it is not a real sport, how we are “just throwing a Frisbee about.” This is quite a common occurrence for the Frisbee player and we are well used to. However, it is these people who usually stare in disbelief when we actually start to play.

What people don’t realise is that Ultimate can be a highly competitive and physical game. At the top level, players needs to be fast, agile, have a high level of co-ordination and be very fit. The players that come along for fun just need to have the basic throws down and they are away. Regardless of level, there is a sense of spirit running throughout Ultimate that makes it so appealing. At all levels, the sport is self-refereed, encouraging fair play and promoting bonds between players. In fact, I have made some

Ben Moxey

great friends all across the country just by playing Ultimate both for the Uni and for club teams. If you are interested in coming along and giving Ultimate Frisbee a go, or even just watching us play, get in touch with us on Facebook via the Brunel Frisbee group. Everyone is welcome, whether you have never played before or are a master of the disc. BRU-WHAT?! FIND OUT MORE Email Ultimate Frisbee via

Taking close man marking a little too seriously

Men’s Hockey push off the Brunel Women’s season with new coaches Hockey run to the beat Adil Khan Deshmukh

BMHC look good for the new season Paul Round Once again, Men’s Hockey have made a decent start to the year, attracting multiple new members to step in and fill the gaps left by those who moved on from university at the end of last year. However, it was a fresh start for the whole club due to two new coaches being brought in to help develop and push the players. The goal is for promotion to be secured for all three sides. The positivity from the new coaches is great to see, and due to the high level of enthusiasm presented by both Aidie and Royce, the general feeling surrounding

Bunch of hanging BUMS Shaun Handy Ever fancied giving climbing a try? Brunel has its own wall to help you get to grips with the ups and downs of facing heights and dominating mountains. Whether you are an experienced pro or complete newbie, our professional instructor will teach you all you need to know

men’s hockey is that this year could be a very successful one. This is demonstrated not only in training, but in the success of the two warm up games which the 1st team have played so far, beating both Kingston Grammar School and Whitgift. Both of these teams posed serious threats, however, the 1st team came away from both games with victories, and with the level of performance being considerably higher in the second game, they look in great shape for their final warm up game against Oxford Brookes.

Men’s Hockey also pride themselves on being a highly sociable club, and this year is set to be no exception. The annual Hockey Pub Golf night was once again a resounding success, with over fifty people participating. There are more socials lined up the rest of this term, including the annual ice skating trip and, of course, Christmas dinner. Therefore, with Men’s Hockey being in good shape both on and off the pitch it look like this is going to be a year to remember!

to get yourself started on indoor walls and outdoor buttresses. Every year we take trips to the Peaks, Wales, Portland, and Cheddar Gorge to put into practice all the skills you have learned. Our socials are pretty fun as well: pub golf, curry night, poker night/Ann Summers night and we are always in Bar Zest after a lesson. Plus we dress up smart for both our Christmas and Annual dinners for food, dancing and awards. And for those interested in LUBE we send a delegation to compete in a fun and friendly environment to represent Brunel on a national level.

Current members are always around to help refine your technique, keep you safe and cheer you on so you’re not left hanging. For only £30 membership for the whole year, you get sessions every Tuesday, Thursday and Sunday, where there is plenty of opportunity to build strength, improve your grade and push yourself harder and higher. And, if you ask nicely, you get access to gear for your own excursions to the ample amount of rock scattered across Britain and the rest of the world. So come and give climbing a go. Face a fear and experience a new thrill.

Hannah Jones On Sunday 25th September, 12 volunteers from Brunel Women’s Hockey left campus at 4:30am (an obscene time of the morning!) arriving at the O2 arena at 5:30am. We all looked extremely out of place as people still up from the night before were only just making their way home from their boozy night out. Nevertheless, we all signed in and were given our breakfast and lunch in a paper bag! Shortly after, we met with the event organisers, who gave all the groups different roles to help the day run smoothly. Four of our volunteers were stationed at the busiest points of the day. This was to ensure that all of the competitors knew where they had to go so they could start the race without worrying. At times it was extremely busy, but we all managed to keep everything under control. The other eight volunteers were stationed at other key points to ensure that the competitors did not go to sections they weren’t supposed to, and some were organising the bag drop-off area. The race started at 9.45am, with Radio 1’s Reggie Yates on stage DJing. After cheering the

Oh, recycling! Is wonderful! Oh, recycling is wonderful!

competitors on, we all had a quick break before setting up the finish line with stations for medals and drinks. The race ended with a DJ set from Calvin Harris, while all our volunteers handed out drinks, picked litter, and made sure there was a constant flow of runners to the end point. We managed to clear up quickly and were sent home at 4pm along with plenty of Powerade freebies! Although the taxis certainly took their time to pick us up (over an hour!)... It’s fair to say that all the volunteers had a well-deserved rest after a busy and enjoyable day out. More importantly, they were rewarded £240 to the club for their hard work! Well done, Women’s Hockey! Sound like your kind of club? Come down and give it a go! Open to all levels, Women’s Hockey currently trains Monday nights 6:30-8pm at the multi-use pitch in the sports park. For more info join us on Facebook. FIND OUT MORE Email Women’s Hockey via

Philly Brown

BUMS are always climbing to new heights

October 2011 - Le Nurb


Brunel Snow Club: Hot stuff in a cold place Chris Ratford

BSC Winter Tour - not to be missed Xander Maritt Brunel Snow Club is one of the biggest clubs on campus. It doesn’t matter if you have never seen snow in your life, or if you shred like a pro: we welcome everyone into BSC! We hold events for everyone, including beginner lessons,

recreational skiing and boarding, freestyle nights and race events. But we aren’t just about snow sports; we put on social events all year round. This includes our annual boat party on the Thames (the biggest end of year party at Brunel), club nights, and the amazing Pub Ski! We also do ice

Adil Khan Deshmukh

skating, a Christmas gathering, and Freeze Festival. We are always getting together to make sure our year is as good as it could ever be. Every year we head out for Winter Tour, which is guaranteed to be one of the best weeks of your life: a full week of shredding or face planting in the Alps, partying,

and general shenanigans. Coming on Winter Tour is something you will never forget! This year we are heading out for Tignes, France, for a nonstop week of Snow Club mayhem with guaranteed big name acts and hundreds of other students.

FIND OUT MORE See what we’re up to, or join in. Connect with us on our Facebook group by searching ‘Brunel Snow Club 2011/12’, or visit our website at!

Brunel Basketball: Unlike the NBA, they aren’t work-shy! Dan Dunscombe Where do I start? Brunel Basketball is one of the most exciting clubs you can get involved in at this University! From our 1st team being ranked 6th in the UK to our open run on Friday evenings, there is something on offer for everyone. Speaking of the 1st team, the atmosphere at our home games is something not to be missed. Many returners will recall the incredible atmosphere present

at the varsity match last year, with the sports hall overflowing with fans! This electricity is something we want present at every home game, so get your butts down to the bleachers in the sports hall this year to support us! The 2nd team are the highest ranked 2nd team in the country from all accounts, so watching them is nothing to be sniffed at. They play a fast-paced, exciting game that is always great fun to watch.

Finally, a word on Friday night. Anyone is able to come down, as long as you join the club, which only costs £20 online at www. Or you can pay £2 per session on the door. It’s a great environment to get involved in, mingle with the team, and improve your basketball skills – what more could you want?! Hope to see you all down at both teams’ home games and on Friday nights, peace!

Mens Football breaks record

Catch Brunel’s high flyers this year

Aaron Bufton A very productive start to the year saw over 200 eager football players sign up for trials, more than BUAFC has ever had. Needless to say, it has been a busy few weeks for those in charge. The trials were held in three slots, and the quality was very high. With all five teams now selected and players having been put through their paces in a series of training games and rigorous fitness sessions, the hard work begins

with an expectant committee looking on. The first match of the season took place with the annual Freshers game against the old rival St Mary’s. Unfortunately, the Bru suffered a 3-2 reverse after leading 2-0, but it has done little to dampen the enthusiasm among the club with the first ever BUAFC social day on the horizon. The event in question, which was suggested by several third years, is paintballing in Maidenhead and

What if you recycle today to make you feel proud?

was thought up with the intention of including everybody within the set-up. The response was fantastic. This, coupled with the buzz created by the School Disco announcement, means the 2011/12 season looks bright for BUAFC. The School Disco is on Monday 24th October in Academy and tickets are set to sell out fast so purchase online. Caps (£2) and ties (£1) will be for sale on campus.

Le Nurb - October 2011



Ever tried sailing? Chris Hulatt Brunel Sailing Club has members of all different abilities, ranging from the racing team to people who have never sailed in their lives. This mix has resulted in a fantastic social atmosphere throughout the year, with club members getting involved in pub crawls, trips abroad, and racing weekends with other universities. Training is a key part of the club. Regular courses allow members to develop dinghy, yachting, and powerboating knowledge. The courses are all run at a subsidised rate through Datchet Water (our home club) and upon successful completion; result in an RYA certificate. Last year, Brunel Sailing club

Mathew Bottoms

was awarded the prize for Most Developed Club of the Year. With a membership of 50+, we were able to pass over 60 qualifications, so there is absolutely no excuse not to get involved. The club owns a selection of boats, allowing for training, racing and social sailing. We meet at the bridge by the sports hall every Wednesday afternoon at 1PM. Transport is provided through the club. We are normally finished by 6pm allowing time for you to get ready before meeting up for a night out, sailing style. FIND OUT MORE Email Sailors bend backwards for victory

There is still time to join Squash at Brunel

Union of Brunel Students

Squash ravers out in force

Jo Barnard So 2011-12 is underway! Freshers’ Week is over, Freshers’ Flu has come knocking and caused havoc, and most people’s alcohol levels have finally returned to a safe level. After signing up at every stall that gave them a free stress ball, Freshers have been getting involved in their hundreds with the multitude of sports clubs and societies. The Squash Club have broken records this year, with membership numbers hitting 50 in only the second week of term! Our first social of the year, Cheerleadinghosted Ministry Rave, was a massive success. Joining forces with Tennis, rackets put their mark

on the social map and showed the freshers how it’s done. On court, this year sees the introduction of a Squash Performance Programme giving members a chance to receive extra coaching and daily access to the IAC. For only £50 for the year, this is the cheapest gym membership going and yet another incentive to join our club. The standard of new blood in the club is exceptional this year, and we are raring to go kick some butt when the league gets underway. But it’s not just about the top players. We have had many curious students come down and give squash a go. When they come back again, and again, and again,

you know you’re doing something right. We have rackets available to borrow; a coach who comes down every week specifically for beginners, and more court time than you can shake a stick at. For anyone still considering squash, wanting to start something new, or just wanting to meet new people and take advantage of the IAC availability – get online at Check out the court times and come down and give it a go! FIND OUT MORE You can contact our Chair, Jo Barnard, on 07817 747 234.

Inside... Rugby League prepares for 2011 26





Snow Club

Men’s & Women’s updates Better than the NBA?

Hot stuff in a cold place

Chris Ashford Rugby League has entered yet another year at Brunel, but this time the recruitment has been so great that we are given more versatility on the field and in training. On top of this, our new coach, Aran Quin, has joined us after coaching over at St.Mary’s. Aran’s experience and understanding in the sport hope to bring a fresh perspective to Brunel Rugby

League and put us on target to winning our first match against Cambridge University. In preparation for the season ahead, the team entered into a 9s tournament in Bristol in just the second week back after summer. This gave us the opportunity for our new players to gel with the older players on and off the pitch and give them a taste of how university rugby league is played. After some convincing game Please recycle.

play from the new recruits, we can now look towards fitting people into the team for the matches ahead. This year, we have the luxury of flexibility with the amount of players we have and the diverse experience levels on offer. However, we are always looking for new players of all experiences and abilities. Our training is held on the cemetery pitches on Monday and Thursday 17:00-19:00. Please

do not hesitate to come down and introduce yourself; we are a friendly, close-knit team looking to enjoy Rugby League and follow on with great team socials. Furthermore, you can contact us through the Brunel Students website. We look forward to meeting you! FIND OUT MORE

Issue 2 2011/12