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For centuries brides and grooms have been walking into one of our churches to get married. They are inspiring places to say your vows and to begin married life together.

This booklet is designed to help you discover whether you can legally get married at one of our churches and to help answer your questions. Our advice is that you don’t firmly book a reception until the wedding is in the diary; as not all dates and times are available, particularly in July & August.

We would love as many couples as possible to get married within the Braydon Brook Group. As you go through the enquiry process please phone or email our Deanery Administrator, Sandra Chin with any questions. We rarely get asked something that we haven’t had to answer before. www.yourchurchwedding.org provides lots of information for preparing for your wedding and married life together.

Mrs Sandra Chin The Deanery Office The Old Squash Court Holloway Malmesbury Wiltshire SN16 9BA Tel: 01666 825019 admin@deanery.org.uk www.braydonbrook.co.uk


Who can get married at one of our churches? On October 1st 2008 new legislation was passed regarding the legal qualifications to getting married. You will need to show that one of these qualifications applies to you.


You may get married in one of our churches if one of you can show that: • You live in the parish or the particular church is your regular place of worship and you are on the electoral roll. • You were baptised at the chosen church or you were prepared for confirmation there • The chosen village was your normal place of residence or worship for a six month period in the past • Your parents lived in the chosen village for six months or more during your lifetime • Your grandparents were married at the chosen church It is your responsibility to provide evidence of qualification when applying along with identification. If you live elsewhere and have no significant links with one of the churches you can still get married here but you will need to worship once a month at the church for 6 months before the publication of Banns of Marriage to qualify. An additional form can be obtained from Sandra Chin. If one or both of you are divorced it is sometimes still possible to get married in one of the churches. Ultimately this decision is at the discretion of the Vicar who has to abide by guidelines from the Archbishop of York’s office. You should ring Sandra Chin (01666 825019) if you would like a confidential appointment with the Vicar to discuss this before booking your wedding. If relevant, an original of the Decree Absolute must be shown when you meet the Vicar.


What do we need to do next? If you are both sure you would like to get married at one of our churches you will need to follow this simple process:


1.

Phone Sandra Chin (01666 825019) to discuss a provisional date and time for your wedding and also whether you can be legally married at one of the churches.

2.

Complete the Application Form and return it to Sandra Chin with a cheque for ÂŁ100 nonrefundable deposit which secures the booking. Please note: fees must be paid at least 4 weeks in advance of the date of the wedding. Receipt of the cheque secures your preferred wedding date / time.

3.

Please bring to Sandra the originals of both of your passports and 2 copies of official proof of your address e.g. a utility bill, TV licence, bank statement. These need to be seen in order to secure booking.

4.

Approximately 6 months before your wedding you will need to make an appointment to meet with the minister marrying you, to prepare the service together, book the wedding rehearsal, and also to get to know each other.

5.

Keep in touch. During this process you can e-mail us at: admin@deanery.org.uk / Our local wedding coordinators: Crudwell Antonia Walls. 01666 577890, Minety Lorna Best. 01666 860754, Oaksey Nick Mangnall. 01666 577982.


How much will our wedding cost? The bad news is that couples on average spend approximately ÂŁ20,000 on their wedding. The good news is that in 2014 a simple service in one of our churches will cost about ÂŁ500. This figure includes the service, banns, administration, the organist, the groundsman, the verger, heating and lighting, of course, your marriage certificate). A non-refundable deposit of ÂŁ100 is required upon booking. It is a good idea to budget carefully and realistically for your wedding in order not to put immediate financial pressure on your marriage.


Organist ring either Mrs. Liz Adey 01666 577414, Mr. Jonathan Adkins 01666 505692 or Mrs Megan Mills 01666 823840 Choir (when available). Please tick the box on the application form and ring Mrs. Eve White (Crudwell) 01666 577036 to confirm 6 months before. The Bells are available in several churches (Charlton, Minety, Oaksey and Crudwell). Please contact Mr Neil Medlan 01666 823461 for Charlton, Cathy Butcher 01666 577612 for Crudwell or Mr John Sheppard 01666 860631 for Minety/Oaksey to confirm 6 months before. Flowers. There are often beautiful flower arrangements in the churches (with the exception in the season of Lent). Your options: Option (a) is for you to choose your own professional florist – such displays to be left in the church until after the subsequent Sunday services. Option (b) is for you to make arrangements with the person responsible for flowers in the church to discuss floral displays – additional costs required in advance. Option (c) is for you accept the floral displays in church on your wedding day – a donation would be gratefully received as the flower arrangers make a special effort if they know a wedding is taking place. Please speak to floral contact below to confirm 6 months before: Ashley: Mrs. Shane Hoskins 01666 577219 Charlton: Mrs. Joyce Smith 01666 822490 Crudwell: Mrs. Helen Carter 01666 577375 or Mrs Judy Clark on 01666 577225 Hankerton: Mrs. Valerie Durnford 01666 577723 Minety: Mrs. Lorna Best 01666 860754 Oaksey: Mrs. Catherine Woodward 01666 577701


What about marriage preparation? You are not just preparing for a wedding, you are preparing for a marriage, a life together. Here are the five essentials of our preparation in the Braydon Brook group.


1. Get to know the church It is good if the church building, the minister, the organist, etc are not strangers to you. Joining us for worship at your particular church will help you feel more relaxed on the big day. 2. Get reacquainted with the Christian faith The words you will be saying on your wedding day reflect the teaching of Jesus and the traditions of the Christian faith. Teaching and worship on a Sunday will help you learn more about the Spiritual content of your service. 3. Get to know each other better Take part in the marriage preparation day held each year. Ask the Vicar for resources which may help your discussions about your married life together. 4. Get familiar with your vows What do the words mean that you are saying to each other? Talk about them together. 5. Ask each other the big and practical questions? How many bank accounts? Will we go to church with our children? How do we make decisions? Is one of us in charge? And the big one: what is the difference between living together and being married?


What happens during the service? Our churches are part of the Church of England. Your service in the church will be a Christian service very different from a Registry Office ceremony but full of ancient wisdom and beauty that will create a sacred and important moment in your lives.


The weddings are conducted by one of the ministers of the Braydon Brook Group. The pattern of a Church of England wedding has developed over centuries and is very similar across the country. A typical outline would be: Entrance of the Bride Welcome & Prayer Hymn Preface to the Marriage Service The Declarations The Collect Reading(s) Sermon Hymn The Marriage The Vows The Giving of Rings The Proclamation The Blessing of the Marriage Hymn Prayers The Dismissal The Signing of the Registers The next four pages give you some information about the music, vows and readings involved in the service. When arranging the production of your own orders of service your minister must check through it before it goes to print. Also please consider that the choir, if you are booking one, will need extra copies if they are singing at your wedding.


How do we select the music? You are not alone. Throughout your preparations the Vicar conducting your service and the relevant organist are available to guide you.


It is good to start discussing together the choice of hymns and organ music for your wedding fairly early on, but the final decision does not need to be made before your meeting with the Vicar. Currently some of those most popular hymns chosen by couples are: Amazing Grace And did those feet in ancient time (Jerusalem) Be thou my vision Give me oil in my lamp (Sing Hosanna) Guide me O Thou great Redeemer Immortal invisible God only wise Lord of all hopefulness Love divine all loves excelling Morning has broken Praise my soul the King of Heaven The King of love my shepherd is You will need to choose three hymns. For the words and to listen to most hymns go to: www.yourchurchwedding.org You will also need to discuss with the organist the music you would like at the entrance of the bride and at the end of the service.


If your family and friends are not regular church goers make sure you choose hymns that the words and music are well know.

What vows and readings are allowed? Within your marriage pack, one booklet, The Marriage Service, contains the complete order of service, including all your vows and some suggested readings from the Bible. As you are being married in church, a reading must come from the Bible.


All the words and vows for your service are already prepared and authorised by the church. Although there is no option to write your own vows for the service the words you will be saying are beautiful, packed full of meaning, and have been handed down from one generation to the next for centuries. You will need to select a Bible reading, or possibly two, for your service. Often a member of the family or close friend reads this, but the Vicar will be happy to do this if you prefer. There are a number of suggestions in The Marriage Service but the most popular reading is from 1 Corinthians Chapter 13: 1 If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. 2 If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. 3 If I give all I possess to the poor and surrender my body to the flames, but have not love, I gain nothing. 4 Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It is not rude, it is not selfseeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth.7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 8 Love never fails. 13 And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.


Fees for 2014 A £100 non-refundable deposit secures the booking and all fees must be paid at least four weeks in advance of the date of the wedding. £ Publication of Banns for Marriage Marriage Service + Marriage Certificate Extra Marriage Certificates (each) Verger Fee (Except Ashley)

21.00 396.00 4.00 50.00

Optional items Heating recommended October – May Ashley, Charlton, Hankerton, Minety Oaksey, Crudwell Permission to Video Bells: Charlton & Minety Oaksey & Crudwell Choir (when available) Organist

25.00 50.00 60.00 90.00 120.00 60.00 60.00

Certificate of Banns

13.00 Cheques should be made payable to ‘Braydon Brook Fees Account’


Check List (for people getting married by Banns) What?

When?

Return Banns of Marriage Application Form to office.

ASAP

Take Passports and Proof of Address to office. Pay Deposit and confirm service booking. If appropriate, to complete the record card of attending worship for the necessary ‘habitual’ period. If either not resident in the parish to arrange for Banns to be called in their home parish. Banns Certificate to Vicar Agreed dates for calling of Banns in host church.

ASAP

Book a meeting with Vicar (to discuss service, music, bells, choir, flowers etc) Produce draft Order of Service for Vicar to check.

Approximately, 6 months before the wedding.

ASAP ASAP: the latest time to start is 8 months before the wedding (to be completed min. of 2 months before wedding) Minimum of 3 months before the wedding, can be much sooner.

Minimum of 3 months before the wedding.

At least a month before the wedding is recommended.

Complete!


Braydon Brook Churches Wedding Booklet