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THE FILM ISSUE

February 2010

z

THE BULLETIN

the third dimension 47

Space battle

Science fiction films can be the ultimate frontier for some couples. Nina Lamparski and Marc Rousseau cross lightsabers over the genre

He says: “My entire life

is sprinkled with memories of science fiction, and it’s no wonder I’m consumed by it. The one event that really triggered my infatu“Frankly ation occurred around the time I have little time for aliens. when I was 11. I was visiting Unless they actually knock family back in Ireland, and, whilst on my door some day to chatting away in the kitchen, I announce that they have conquered Planet Earth and suddenly heard this strange “Pitchooee!” sound coming from the living room. It turned out that the USS Enterprise therefore require immediwas battling it out with aliens known as Klingons; my uncle ate access to my apartment, was fully immersed in an episode of the original Star Trek, I simply do not care about three-headed, green-limbed life in another dimension. Nor called Errand of Mercy. This outdated Technicolor spaceopera was awash with awesome haircuts, ’70s-style uniforms do I care for Klingons, Doctor Who or lightsabers that go and a handsome Canadian devil portraying Captain James T zwooosh. I prefer the pretty sunsets of the Yucatan peninKirk. No other man will ever handle the art of dramatically sula to post-apocalyptic landscapes with five moons. In my pausing five times in four words with as much panache as world, a wormhole is spelled in two separate words and William Shatner. My eyes locked onto the TV and, in short, refers to a hole dug by a worm, as opposed to a hypothetical I’ve been reading, watching and pretty much breathing scitunnel connecting two different points in spacetime. ence fiction ever since. If aforementioned aliens threw me into a cavity and I popped out in the vegetable aisle of the supermarket three blocks away, I’d A few years after this mind-blowing experience, I saw a little film be more than happy to say, “Sorry guys, my bad, you were right. called Blade Runner. After that, my fasci“Sci-fi makes me feel like nothing is Thanks so much, this will make my life a lot easier”. However, nation turned into impossible. For me, space is riddled until then, I will stick to my willing suspension of belief in scioutright obsession. with adventure and opportunity” ence fiction – much to The Man’s chagrin. He is an addict to the Different types of genre, you see, and has been trying to convert me for many, many sci-fi followed. From post-apocalyptic time-travelling robots (The months now. Unlike Terminator films) and the erasure of memories of love (Eternal “It’s not that I negate the raison d’être the Starship, his is a Sunshine of the Spotless Mind) to bin-collecting robots falling in of sci-fi; it’s that it does not speak to me, failed entreprise. love and saving humanity in the process (Wall-E), I became enam- at least not in a humanoid language” It’s not that I negate oured with a genre that will no doubt far exceed my expectations the raison d’être of for the rest of my life; the present will never catch up with our sci-fi; it’s that it does not speak to me, at least not in a humanoid lanimagination of the future. guage. Although… thinking about it, there have been a few works I The next generation might get to fly a car or shoot lasers or go enjoyed alongside E.T (let’s face it, only very bad people would not to Mars, but what they’ll dream of will appear as extraordinary to like E.T.). H G Wells’ War of the Worlds was hugely entertaining them as these visions have been to me. – even more so because thousands of Americans mistook a broadPerhaps for some it might be incomprehensible as to why I love casted radio version of the novel for a serious news bulletin about sci-fi so much. I guess it makes me feel like nothing is impossible. Martians invading the US. The ensuing mass hysteria must have Today all I hear about is a planet in trouble, the human race slowly been a thing of beauty to behold. Admittedly that is one of sci-fi’s destroying its environment, and climate change signalling the end of great strengths: it tickles age-old fears by conjuring up tangible, plaulife as we know it. Well, I remember that once we went to the moon, sible nightmare scenarios which could well happen if we played our and that this feat inspired the world over. A passion for something present cards just badly enough. I appreciated films like Minority so inherently wonderful, is what we need once again if we’re going to Report and District Nine for the same reason. And of course I loved get out of this mess. For me, all I see is space, riddled with adventure Wall-E. Only very bad people would not like Wall-E. Yet, overall, most sci-fi either bores me to tears or makes me feel and opportunity; I wonder why we’re not there anymore. I tell you these things in much the same way as I have told my depressed. Thanks, but no thanks. Plus, there’s really no need for me to follow the hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy – I already have a other half. For some unfathomable reason she just doesn’t get it. Maybe we should send her out there first.” space cadet at home.” z SHUTTERSTOCK

She says:



Opinion with bite