3. I Want to Be Trusted Victorian writer George MacDonald said, “To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.” The Law of Solid Ground in The 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership states that trust is the foundation of leadership. While that is true, it can also be said that trust is the foundation of all good relationships. Good marriages, good business relationships, and good friendships all require trust. If you don’t have trust, there can be no open and honest interaction, and the relationship will be only temporary. “TO BE TRUSTED IS A GREATER COMPLIMENT THAN TO BE LOVED.”—GEORGE MACDONALD
Manchester Inc., a consulting firm in Philadelphia, used a survey of more than two hundred companies to discover the best ways to build trust with employees. They found that people who engender trust . . . • Maintain integrity. • Openly communicate vision and values. • Show respect for employees as equal partners. • Focus on shared goals rather than personal agendas. • Do the right thing regardless of personal risk. • Listen with an open mind. • Demonstrate compassion. • Maintain confidences.4 While you cannot control whether people give you their trust, you can control your actions toward them. And you can determine to give them your trust. Former U.S. Secretary of State Henry L. Stimson remarked, “The chief lesson I have learned in a long life is that the only way you can make a man trustworthy is by trusting him; and the surest way to make him untrustworthy is to distrust him and show your distrust.” It takes a leap of faith to put your trust in another person, especially someone you don’t know well. Yet that’s what it takes to practice the Golden Rule. As you strive to invest confidence in others in the same way you would like it invested in you, take comfort in the words of Camillo Benso di Cavour, who said, “The man who trusts men will make fewer mistakes than he who distrusts them.” 4. I Want to Be Respected When others trust me, I receive responsibility and authority. When others respect me, it touches something deeper within me. It gives me dignity, and it builds my confidence. Indian general and onetime Olympic athlete Dalip Singh observed, “A man who does not respect his own life and that of others robs himself of his dignity as a human being.” Not long ago I read an article about a young man who, at age twenty-three, went to work as the senior pastor of his first church. He found the experience very intimidating because he was to be the spiritual leader of people who had children and grandchildren older than he was. His story intrigued