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I gave my husband the gift of a play at the park with our daughter while I took a nap. How is that a gift to him? It worked on two fronts. First, it gave him a chance to bask in our baby’s undivided attention, something he rarely got while I was around. I think he felt like his daughter’s hero for the first time. Second, it changed the balance of our parenting partnership. We both realized he was capable of doing more with the baby, and it dissolved a leaden ball of resignation I didn’t realize I had been dragging. I saw new possibilities for taking breaks from my demanding role. It made me calmer, happier, and more hopeful. Planning a simple play for Father’s Day changed the outlook for our marriage. I saw that I could lean on my partner, and realized how much he already held me up. Relief and gratitude reawakened the fun chick inside me. Tell me that was not a gift to him. If you are running on empty, use Father’s Day as a chance to reconnect with the pleasure of your husband’s presence. Here are some easy, fun ways to celebrate his power to light up your life.
Effortless Family Fun Plan a low-overhead outing where you enjoy the extra set of hands while Dad enjoys his amazing family. • Grab the stroller for an after-dinner walk with a stop for dessert. • Get outside for twenty minutes with a Frisbee, a bottle of bubbles, or a bugcatcher.
• Go somewhere you have a membership: the zoo, the science center, or the gym with babysitting. • Go to the mall. Grab a snack and daydream about how you would splurge if you won the lottery. • Establish a weekly Family Outing Day and let Dad choose the first destination.
• Write it On the Wall: Think of one thing about your husband that you appreciate, and scribble it on a note board or the bathroom mirror. Once a week, replace the message. With only a few minutes’ worth of thought and preparation, you can begin a routine that helps both of you appreciate your partnership.
Superdad Time
Give your husband a chance to shine by planning an easy Daddy date.
Restorative Couple Time If you miss cuddling and connecting, you can bet your husband does too. Give in to that worn-out feeling and grab a quiet, stress-free moment together. • Lazy Massage Hour: one person controls the TV remote while they massage the other’s feet, shoulders, or head for 30 minutes. Then, switch roles. • Wine and Cheese on the Couch: After the kids go to bed, raid the pantry and lay out a grown up buffet with wine, cheese, olives and fruit, or beer, nachos, and guacamole. Use whatever feels like an indulgence. • 90 Minute Jail Break: If your kids are very little and you can’t be away too long, book a babysitter for a micro date. Have apps at your old dating hang-out, or spend a handful of coins at the arcade. • Bicker-Buster: Skip the stressed-out squabbles with a quiet walk. Bring a tasty drink to keep your mouth busy, and relax together in the outdoors with no pressure for conversation.
• Send the gang to the park or pool with prepacked necessities. • Set out a project, like a recipe, puzzle, or build-your-own-birdhouse kit. • Plan a backyard campout and let them set up the tent, cook hotdogs and marshmallows, and tell stories with spooky flashlight face. Or, let them build forts and play with flashlights all evening in the living room. • Send them shopping for snacks and have a Netflix movie night. • Commission them to produce a video that captures the essence of Dad. If you are facing Father’s Day with a frown, consider an effortless celebration. Free your mind, surrender to a welldeserved break, and give your husband a chance to bask in your warm appreciation of his Superdad powers. MBP Laurie is the mom of two energizer bunnies, and the wife of a willing and wonderful Superdad.
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