happy life learn eight simple secrets of happy families
“Sometimes we forget that life needs to be simple. It’s okay to sit around the table and have dinner together. In the quest for bigger, faster, stronger, smarter, we forget to simply be still. “
appiness can vary depending on our personal circumstances. But why are some families more resilient and happier despite the obstacles life throws their way?
they hang out together. Real connection takes as little as five minutes a day, according to Resolve Counseling child-family therapist Jennifer Jackson-Rice, LSCSW/LSCW. Sit next to each other during homework time, cook together, read books at bedtime and chat with each other while driving to activities. Create calmer, more cheerful mornings by prepping the night before or getting yourself up a little earlier. “That connection in the first part of the day can carry kids throughout the day,” Jackson-Rice says. Michelle Hon, a South Kansas City mom of two boys, ages 4 and 2, agrees. She says that the first 30 minutes in the morning and the last 30 minutes before bedtime help her family feel grounded, calm and loved. “We do a lot of snuggles and cuddles in the morning, and we try not to make that a rushed time in our home,” Hon says. In the evening, she and her husband, Michael, stick to a bedtime routine with their sons, which includes reading books together and quietly reflecting on the day. they cheer for each other. Celebrate your kids’ interests and successes by acknowledging their efforts rather than zeroing in on what went wrong: • “I loved watching you play.”
• “I like how you colored this so neatly!” • “Great job on your test. I can tell you really concentrated.”
“When we praise our children, self-esteem goes up. When self-esteem is high, connection is good, behaviors are good,” Jackson-Rice says.
they seek fulfillment. While material items like the latest electronics, designer jeans and trendy toys may bring fleeting joy, they won’t deliver lasting contentment. “I don’t think we can teach our kids to be happy if we’re looking to external sources to feed that emotion,” says parent coach Cati Winkel, owner of the Empowered Parent Coach, Overland Park.
kcparent.com january 2018
KC Parent Magazine January 2018