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A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVILLE HER A LD A ND THE K E A RNE Y COURIER • JA N. 26, 2012

I DO BRIDAL GUIDE


A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVILLE HER A LD A ND THE K E A RNE Y COURIER • JA N. 26, 2012

2 Flower shop helps wedding plans I DO

BLOSSOM Jean’s Flowers has been in business 26 years

Suzi Esper, Kelsie Esper, Amy Esper, Linda Esper and Jean Roe look at a picture of a flower arrangement on Suzi Esper’s phone Jan. 14 at Jean’s Flowers in downtown Smithville. Suzi Esper is a sister-in-law, Kelsie Esper is the maid of honor, Amy Esper is the future bride and Linda Esper is the mother of the bride. Amy’s wedding is planned for June 30. (Photo by Kenny Ragland) By Kenny Ragland Northland brides need not cross the river or state lines when planning their nuptials. Jean’s Flowers, just across from the downtown stage pavilion in Smithville, is one of the area merchants that has been supplying wedding parties for years. In the mid-1980s a young Jean Roe purchased her building from the Lowman family. Since then, she and her employees have been supplying flowers for all occasions and especially to weddings.

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“It’s a lot of work, but we all enjoy it,” said Roe. “We have supplied flowers for up to five different stages of wedding events.” People commonly think of flowers just being at the actual wedding ceremony. But there are many more ways flowers can and are used when vows are exchanged. “We bring flowers to the rehearsal dinners many times,” Roe said. “Also, the grooms commonly get a dozen roses for the bride and have them placed in her dressing room.” The third stage is, of course, the wedding itself. “That is where most people see the arrangements,” Roe said. “But the receptions can be decorated, too, and we get in on that a lot of the time.” Although they don’t happen very often, breakfast gatherings can occur when weddings are hosted at hotels, with the bride and groom staying there as well. “Dr. (Linda) Buckmiller’s daughter’s wedding was that way,” Roe said of a local chiropractor’s daughter. “They brought wedding ceremony flowers in for the breakfast.” Roe supplies flowers for about 35 weddings annually. One bridal party said that Jean’s Flowers came highly recommended. “Several friends and neighbors recommended Jean’s to me,” said bride-to-be Amy Esper. “They said they had seen Jean’s Flowers work weddings they had been to.”


JA N. 26, 2012 • A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVI LLE HER A LD A N D THE K E A RN E Y CO URIER

Esper will be getting married on June 30 in a hotel in Kansas City. Her mom thought Jean’s was the right choice too. “I think it’s important to support the local businesses,” said Linda Esper. Roe thinks so, too. Jean’s Flowers works on wedding preparations with several other businesses in town, and she has accolades for these wedding industry colleagues. “Robin Summa with Satin Stitches can supply bridal gowns, and they are very nice,” Roe said. “She has 30 years of sewing and alteration experience and can easily make sure the dresses fit just right.” For food, Jean’s Flowers has worked with Andrea Nolan of Celebration Cakes and caterer Shelly Frala of Fancy Fare Catering, both of Smithville. But even when brides and grooms are shopping in the Northland, that doesn’t mean they tie the knot here. “We’ve done weddings in the Midland Theater in downtown Kansas City, churches, hotels and even the Kansas City Library,” Roe said. Designing arrangements to fit the occasion sometimes requires some creativity. “We made floral stands out of books at the library,” Roe said. “We’ve even had vases with live swimming goldfish, beta purple fish and vases with butterflies inside, Roe said. She said wedding parties could expect to pay hundreds or thousands of dollars for floral arrangements, depending on the size of the ceremony and reception.

Pick a color

I DO

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Choosing a hue for bridesmaid gowns

Bridesmaids are an important part of for gowns. When making this decision, the wedding party, and most brides opt to consider bridesmaids’ ethnicity and skin have a handful of close friends and family tone. members play a special role in the wedAfrican-American women — Women ding. Choosing a gown and a color that will flatter all of the bridesmaids typically with dark skin and hair may really shine takes a little work. in jewel-colored gowns, including silver, An overwhelming majority of couples gold, purple and salmon. Very pale colors choose to have a formal wedding. The may be daring and conspicuous. average number of bridesmaids for these Asian and olive-skinned women— weddings is four. Considering about 2 million weddings take place in North Ameri- Those with a slight yellow tone to their ca every year, that’s a lot of bridesmaids skin will look good in many colors, includfor whom gowns and other attire must be ing red, navy, peach and fuchsia. Howplanned. ever, avoid colors in light yellow, aqua, Many bridesmaids worry about the gray, taupe or mint, which may make the gowns they will wear come the big day. bridesmaid look washed out. Horrible bridesmaid dresses have been Fair-skinned women — Ladies with the butt of jokes for years, and many people have their own stories of garish pale skin will benefit from richly colored gowns they’ve been asked to don for a gowns in jewel tones. Pastels may work, but be careful about those depending on wedding. Some have said that brides intentionally hair color. Pink or red-hued gowns may choose ugly gowns for their bridesmaids clash with someone with auburn hair. to ensure they’re not outshined on the big Yellow and green may not work with a day. Although this fair brunette. Gray may be the case for and silver may wash Many brides gravitate toward out someone who some, most brides aspire to select mid-level blues, greens, pinks is pale and blonde. gowns that will be and purples for their weddings, flattering for all. And Once a color is simply because those colors color scheme is intechosen, brides also transcend the seasons. gral in the choice of need to consider gown. the season. Certain Every well-planned wedding carries a colors may look out of place depending color scheme. This includes the color a on the season. For example, an evergreen bride selects for her bridesmaids to wear. or deep blue may seem wintry during But not every color accentuates every- a summer wedding. Similarly, russet or one’s features. Therefore, some experi- brown may work for the autumn but mentation might be necessary to find a not for a spring wedding. Many brides color that is flattering to all and fits with gravitate toward mid-level blues, greens, the color scheme. pinks and purples for their weddings, Depending on hair color and skin shade, simply because those colors transcend there are many flattering hues available the seasons.

Bridesmaids are supposed to draw attention away from the bride There may be arguments over dresses and how many bridesmaids to have in a wedding party now, but in ancient times it was “the more the merrier.” That’s because bridesmaids were another measure to keep the bride safe against evil spirits. Essentially the bridesmaids were decoys for the spirits — dressing like the bride to confuse the spirits or maybe help deter them to leave the bride be. — Metro Creative After colors are worked out, the style of the gown deserves consideration. Because not every bridesmaid has the same physical attributes, many brides are now open to selecting a color and length and allowing the bridesmaid herself to choose the exact style. This way someone who is busty won’t feel uncomfortable in strapless, and someone who is thin won’t be overwhelmed by a lot of ruffles. The intent is to have bridesmaids feel beautiful and comfortable, and different styles can help achieve this. Making the effort to choose a gown color and style that is flattering to all in the bridal party will help the ladies feel they are truly a special part of the wedding. — Metro Creative


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A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVILLE HER A LD A ND THE K E A RNE Y COURIER • JA N. 26, 2012 I DO

Secrets to living

Couples can realize that there are some thorns that come with the roses of marriage, and staying happy together does take work. Here is what a handful of Northland couples say it takes to make a marriage a happy, enduring union. They offered their advice on condition of anonymity. • Spend more time thinking about the marriage than the wedding. So many people get wrapped up in planning the wedding and all of the details — don’t forget the wedding will only last for one day, but the marriage should last forever. • You get out of it what you put into it. Invest time, commitment and energy in your spouse. Your priorities are where you spend your time. Therefore, as a marriage, block out times and dates for just you and your spouse. This can be done on a weekly or monthly basis. Your spouse deserves your undivided attention. • Compliment your spouse in front of others. • Live with the person first. Yes, I know it’s a bit untraditional, but people really show their true colors once you’re living together. Live together pre-wed-

ding so there are no surprises. • Communication is vital. Both individuals must communicate. • After having children, make sure to make time for each other. Most couples tend to put children first. • If you want to be successful at something, you have to study it. There are tons of books out there about marriage. The challenge is that you have to read them to find out what you have to change to be a better spouse. You can’t read them to find all the things your spouse should change. • Accept your spouse for what he/she is and do not intend to change him/ her. You fell in love with this person for a reason, concentrate on stuff you fell in love with. • Marriage is like your childhood — learn and share!

Some might say a long celebrity marriage is one that endures the duration of the newly betrothed’s trip down the aisle. We’ve seen Britney Spears dissolve a marriage after 55 hours and Kim Kardashian call it quits after 72 days. It seems even money can’t buy matrimonial happiness. But some couples have been together for 50, 60 years and say they’re still as much in love as they were the day they spoke their “I dos.” What do they know that others do not? According to clinical psychologist and relationship guru Dr. Phil McGraw, “We all need to be flexible and to compromise in marriage, but you’ve got to be true to your core traits and characteristics, what I call your authentic self.” Some couples enter a relationship projecting a persona they believe the other person wants — one that really isn’t what they’re all about. This could be a woman trying to fill the role of her husband’s nurturing mom or a guy playing the protector to his wife. In reality, marriage is more of a partnership, and truth and trust are often at the basis of good marriages.

There are many other “secrets” that marriage experts will offer to couples seeking the magic formula. Whether you’re pondering marriage or have already tied the knot, consider the following advice to make a marriage endure for the long haul. There’s no such thing as the perfect marriage. Some couples create an image of what they think marriage is supposed to be, and that image often goes “poof” once reality sets in. Even soulmates are bound to frustrate or irritate one another from time to time. Couples should express their frustrations. Talking about the things that are bothering you with your partner opens up a discussion and can help you work through things. Divorce should not be seen as a viable option. Couples who want to bail on the marriage at every turn could be directing their energy toward divorce as the only solution instead of discovering ways to remove the cause of strife. Divorce can sometimes be

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JA N. 26, 2012 • A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVI LLE HER A LD A N D THE K E A RN E Y CO URIER I DO

as man and wife

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the easy way out when you think about the work that goes into keeping a marriage working. Experts say that there are a few issues, like adultery, abuse and drug/alcohol addiction, that may be reasonable catalysts for divorce if personal safety and sanity is being compromised.

Put “we” first. Many people operate on a “me” mentality. When you’re part of a couple, give more to your spouse than you take. If he or she is doing the same, you’re working collectively for the benefit of the marriage instead of yourselves.

Make time for romance. Too often married couples forget what it was like to date when all of their attention was spent on each other instead of the house, kids, work, etc. Today there seems to be even more distractions, from emails to texts to pressure and obligations at the office. Happy couples find the time to spend quality time with their spouses — even if that’s only 10 minutes of alone time a day.

Respect each other. Often couples having troubles realize they treat strangers better than they treat each other. Would you use the insults or unflattering terms that you sometimes throw at your spouse with a complete stranger? Probably not. Good marriages are based on a foundation of respect and love. It’s easy to lose feelings of love if the respect is gone. — Metro Creative

Couples who have stayed married for decades often put each other first and share a mutual respect.

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A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVILLE HER A LD A ND THE K E A RNE Y COURIER • JA N. 26, 2012 I DO

Get good reception

with these personal touches Over the course of their lifetimes, many people will be wedding guests on several occasions. During the height of wedding season, weddings can run into one another, as the format and the festivities are similar at various ceremonies. Couples interested in setting their nuptials apart may want to enhance the wedding reception with a few unique ideas. Who hasn’t attended a wedding that seems formulaic? The couple enters, they do their spotlight dance, there’s food, a bouquet toss and then the cake cutting. Guests may actually be able to predict what’s coming next. While it is often customary and easy to follow tradition, that doesn’t mean you cannot buck with tradition and offer a few creative ideas to make your event stand out. Here are several ideas you can introduce into your wedding to add something special to the reception. Skip the big entrance. Those who were kind enough to attend the ceremony have already been introduced to the newly minted happy couple. Instead of spending the cocktail hour in the isola-

tion of the wedding suite, mingle with your guests from start to finish. So much time is spent posing for pictures or being out of touch with guests, the cocktail hour can be a great time to sit and chat. Being with guests during the cocktail hour means you don’t have to make that big entrance from behind closed doors. Guests will have all eyes on you when you step on the dance floor for your first dance together. Dance to an upbeat number. Guests are expecting a slow, sappy tune. What they may not expect is an upbeat song that shows you are willing to have a little fun. If you haven’t mastered the waltz but enjoy a little quick step now and again, feel free to choose a tune that shows your excitement and love for each other. Encourage couples to dance together. It’s often customary for the bridal party to join the bride and groom on the dance floor midway through the first dance. However, that leaves spouses or significant others waiting in the wings while their dates

Use the bouquets of the bridal party as the centerpieces of some of the reception tables as one way to bring something different to your wedding.

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JA N. 26, 2012 • A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVI LLE HER A LD A N D THE K E A RN E Y CO URIER I DO

tango with groomsmen or bridesmaids. Instead, don’t have assigned partners. Rather, encourage your bridal party members to dance with whomever they choose. Swap the garter/bouquet toss for something more meaningful. If you’re part of a couple who feels the garter and bouquet toss has become trite, there are other ways to create special moments in your celebration — ones that don’t single out the singletons who haven’t yet found their special someones. Use this time to present a small gift or token of your affection to someone on the guest list who has served as a mentor or source of inspiration. Choose one special component as an extra goodie for guests. Some couples feel the more they offer the better guests will view their wedding. Spending more money doesn’t necessarily mean guests will have a better time. If you want to go above and beyond the ordinary, find one thing that you absolutely love and offer that at the party. It could be a flambe presentation, a chocolate or candy bar, a carving station with your all-time favorite food (even if that’s PB&J), or a carnival-inspired automatic photo booth. Hire a live performer. Although it’s hard to beat the performance quality

of your wedding song being performed by the original artist, unless you’re cousins with Celine Dion, chances are she won’t be available to sing “My Heart Will Go On” at your reception. However, a live band adds a certain level of excitement that a disk jockey may not be able to provide. Those who are adding a cultural or ethnic component to their wedding may want to hire a dance troupe or another type of performer, like a bagpiper, as an added measure of entertainment for guests. Let them eat ... cookies? Some people just don’t like cake. Therefore, why should a couple have to cut a seven-tiered white confection? Towers of different types of treats can be created from just about anything and serve as the perfect backdrop for that classic cake-cutting photo. A pyramid of cream puffs, stacks of brownies, a cookie castle, or cereal-cake concoctions can work. Some bakeries will decorate a “dummy” styrofoam cake, and then you can serve apple pie a la mode, if you desire. Stage a costume switch. Let’s face it, dancing all night in a long gown takes some stamina. As the bride, have a more comfortable cocktail dress available to switch into for the latter part of the reception. It will also add some variety to your wedding photos. — Metro Creative

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First dance song ideas

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If Michael Buble or Nat King Cole aren’t on your playlists, chances are you may be looking for a first-dance song that’s a little less traditional for your wedding reception. Couples considering a song that’s a little different and speaks to them but won’t necessarily offend the wedding purists in attendance, might want to consider the following tunes: “All I Want is You” (U2) “Amazing” (Aerosmith) “Crash” (Dave Matthews Band) “Crazy for You” (Adele) “Faster” (Matt Nathanson) “For You I Will” (Monica) “Here Without You” (3 Doors Down) “Kiss Me” (Sixpence None the Richer) “I’ll Stand by You” (The Pretenders) “Love Song” (The Cure) “No One” (Alicia Keys) “Nothing Compares to You” (Sinead O’Connor) “Suga Suga” (Baby Bash) “Without You” (Rent Soundtrack) “You Want to Make a Memory” (Bon Jovi)

— Metro Creative

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A SPECI A L A DV ERTISING SUPPLEM ENT TO THE SMITHVILLE HER A LD A ND THE K E A RNE Y COURIER • JA N. 26, 2012 I DO

Trivia for the happy couple Throwing rice — It has become de rigueur to blow bubbles, toss birdseed or release doves when the bride and groom leave the house of worship newly betrothed. That’s because savvy individuals found that raw rice can pose a hazard to birds pecking in the area. However, rice throwing is an old custom that dates back to the Middle Ages, when wheat or rice where thrown to symbolize fertility for the couple. Wedding cake — The traditional wedding cake evolved from Roman times when the cake was originally made from wheat. It was broken over the bride’s head to ensure fertility. All of the guests eat a piece for good luck. Single women used to place a piece of wedding cake under their pillows in the hopes of finding their own husbands. Wedding rings — Wearing of wedding rings dates back

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Many brides-to-be look forward to the day when they visit a bridal salon and are able to try on gowns for the first time. There are certain tips that can make the day go much more smoothly and potentially reduce the amount of time it may take to find the perfect gown. • Wear a supportive, well constructed strapless bra or corset in your size. If you will be wearing a petticoat, also have the right size available. • Go without face makeup when trying on gowns so they remain clean. • Try to wear your hair similar to the style you have in mind for your wedding. • Note that the size of the wedding gown you will wear is typically one to two sizes larger than your day-to-day clothes. Proper measurements can be matched to designers’ size charts. • It’s best to limit the number of people with whom you shop to one or two trusted friends or family members. An entourage can be confusing. • It’s always better to order a slightly larger gown and leave room for alterations if you are between sizes. — Metro Creative

Try on

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2012 Bridal Guide  

Tips for wedding planning, including flowers for the big day, choosing a color scheme, selecting bridesmaid dresses, secrets to living happi...

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