Like a wise old internet meme once said, “If somebody hates you for no reason, GIVE that motherfucker a reason.” Here are Beth Brown’s top twenty:
1. She looks good in every color.
2. Her excellent penmanship.
3. She was making zines before you knew what a guillotine cutter was for.
4. Sheâ€™s not afraid to tell you what she thinks.
5. Sheâ€™d rather read a book than watch TV.
6. Her tattoos are the coolest.
7. She was anti-social before it was hip.
8. Those lips.
9. Thugs cross the street when they see her coming.
10. She is fully fueled by coffee.
11. She has a standing invitation to join the circus.
12. She can fix a car.
13. She still loves DEVO.
14. That red hair.
15. She smells like sugar and spiceâ€”even in July.
16. Thereâ€™s no goal too high for her.
17. She gets a warm, fuzzy feeling from doing good deeds.
18. She can cook like your Grandma.
19. Have you seen her husband?
20. Haters only motivate her to achieve greater things.