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The Thing


The Big Thing

Editorial The hardest part about being a editor is writing the editorial. There are so many things to say but no idea where to start or how to say them. The past few days I have spent with a group of amazing people. People who I have found their way to my heart. They have created articles, videos, photos and newspapers what have given me laughter, tears and happiness. I have been amazed by the activeness and creativity a group of youngsters have when given a simple task of filling some papers with words or capturing the most awkward moments on photo or video. There are no exact words that can define how I feel about my team, but I guarantee to you those would be something alike to “supermegahyperamazinglyspecialandawesometeaminthehistoryoftheworld� Don’t get me started on chairs and organisers. About the organisers, what

amazes me the most is that there are only five of them and they managed to make an session that I wont definitely ever forget. Seriously, think about it, you have a awesome university where all happened, a comfy bed at a hotel and lots of yummy stuff from sponsors. And chairs, the guys you spent time with the most and who guided you to create the resolutions what you right now present and defend. If you can, go and give them a big hug and thank them for all their hard work. And yes, I did sill remember you, delegates. You are everything. You are the guys who we work hard for, who we do all of this, who we want to make happy and who we want to go home after the session with a warm feeling, a want to get to the next session. I hope to see you all very soon !

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Jussi Valdsalu

But first, let me take a selfie

Find Valdo!

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Better Than The Average Maria Kristiina Prass Bigot What is the first thing you think of when I say “discrimination”? If you’re anything like me (and I can’t really say if that’d be a good or a bad thing), you’ll have thought about the “usual” kinds of discrimination. And yes, it is sad that I can use the word “usual” in this context and not exaggerate. Racial or gender based, with some extension, sexual orientation or identification based, those are the kinds we generally hear about in the context of discrimination. What it took me about a day to realise, though, is how shallow that first thought is. Think about it this way: you see an 18-year-old girl on the bus with a small child that looks to be about 4. They are talking about what they are going to do when they get home and

the child asks what she can have for dinner that night. What is the reaction in your head? Obviously, since we are Estonians (well, most of us), we have the visual emotional range of a mannequin when around strangers, but I mean internally. And be truthful here. If you can honestly say you would assume they are sisters, congratulations. Really. I am proud of you. You are a better person than those +20 bus full of people I encountered when I picked up my little sister from the kindergarden 3-5 years ago. You wouldn’t believe the looks I got, the “Shame on you!” in that little old lady’s eyes who looked to be so innocent before she noticed I had a toddler with me. And that, my friends, is discrimination. Do not for a minute mistake the beginning of this article for me belittling those kinds of actions that people of those characteristics may have to tolerate from others. I am genuinely baffled at times that in this day and age, it is still a question to be asked if gays should be allowed to get married or adopt, if a transgender person should be able to choose which toilet they wish to use or if someone who’s latino should be allowed to be president outside of South America. I mean, seriously, who the hell cares?! Sadly, many do. And the only thing I cannot tolerate is people being stubbornly, stupidly, blindly intolerant.

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Yes, that may be a paradox. But my point with this small story is that discrimination is sneaky. It hides itself so well from you, you may not notice it. Personally, I try my best not to discriminate against anyone, but when I see girls wearing skirts so short I can tell if they trim or shave, I discriminate a bit. Every time you assume things about someone by what you think is true, you’re already discriminating. As much as I hate to say it, it kind of is the same as the nar-

row-minded bunch of word-I-willnot-use-here Estonian commentators who keep insisting that being gay is the same as being a pedophile. Keep an eye on it, and yourself. We all strive to be better, I hope, and approaching EVERYONE with an open mind is part of being a good person, if you ask me, at least. But hey, to end on a cheery note, here’s a Bad Joke Eel joke I always laugh at for 20 minutes. :)

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Technoetiquette Joonas Tepp

Etiquette - the french-derived word has been used throughout time, by one name or another, to differentiate between social classes and control people’s public behaviour. But public nowadays also encompasses the virtual social scene, where keeping others from doing something for no other apparent reason than your own peace of mind is not only acceptable, but readily encouraged.

The need to lash out against any negative stressor is an understandable part of humanity and it’s what has made society what we see today. This has become especially clear during the last few tech-filled years. But amidst the rise of living standards, small annoyances will be harder to distinguish from the larger ones. Someone posting one too many pictures of his or her face or food is in no way comparable

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to the emotional gut punch of her being more enthralled by a smartphone rather than you. Yet we act like it is. The same goes for sharing any content, excessively or not, be it questionnaires depicting you as Dr. No or pictures attributing healing properties to Likes. Especially in view of social media’s customisability, which makes the nagger always an accomplice to the apparent etiquette crime being committed. Just as it is in our day-today life, wherein you have to change your outlook instead of changing the people around you, it is too on social utility sites. Rather than attempting to bring about social utopia by telling everyone to stop doing things, why not choose a more efficient road and quite literally change your online outlook. Pin down the most troublesome posters and sites they are posting from and change the restrictions that apply to them. It’s not as if the instinct to react based on your gut is ever going away, which sadly bodes long life for meaningless trends. The youth of the future will still update their FacePad accounts

with pseudo-philosophical contemplations about how Holodecks are ruining the social scene. We’ll be yearning for the simpler time of VR, while a 23-year old know-it-all is writing an article about the mindless and unexplainable hate against dickpics on Xstagram. History always repeats itself and it’s our duty to make sure the next go-around will have less hate-filled reactionary trends and more causes worth our time and energy. As Sophocles once wrote in Antigone: “All men make mistakes, but a good man yields when he knows his course is wrong, and repairs the evil.”

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“Does anybody have anything against blindfolds?” Hele-Mai Viiksaar Sometimes, committee work can be compared to being thrown in the dark, cold water with no idea where the shore is. You have no idea what is happening next and you don’t know if the person next to you will help you float or drown you. You are being blindfolded. Don’t worry though, the lovely Terje and Greta are always willing to toss you a life preserver! If you put 8 totally different individuals in a tiny space things might get funny! Fortunately, Valdo’s dark prediction that while being stuck in a small room “everyone will want to kill everybody” did not apply on this case. It is remarkable, that people

with such strong ideas can come on a compromise with each other so easily. How does one achieve such unity? Well, for one thing it is always good to play some games. “Honey, tell me that you love me!” Well, I can definitely say that this game eventually put a smile on even the most serious face. Making a woman smile can sometimes be a tricky task. Desperate times ask for even more desperate measures. Rainis knows what to say when sexy whispering doesn’t work: “Honey, I have a Ferrari.Would you smile for me?” Funnily enough, Julia who was always wearing an almost mystical smile became a total rock-face during the game and was the hardest nut to crack! But we broke her after all. Go team! They say, that sometimes it is easier to share your secrets with strangers. How would you react when being told to write down you deepest, darkest or the kinkiest secret on a piece of paper and then afterwards guess which secret belongs to whom? Most of them we will take to our graves. Some of those were actually rather cute, but what it taught us the most is that first of all. The saying “quiet water runs deep” (you know who I’m talking about WINK) really does apply and just because someone looks like a person who would run into a post doesn’t mean she has done it. Watching persons evolve and grow together during the teambuilding is almost magical. But we also see peo-

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ple from their different sides. You can’t take a guy with a fake-italian accent and silly jokes seriously but when during brainstorming he suddenly becomes an unstoppable good idea machine I dear you not to! Elina, a girl who at the first sight seems a bit shy and rather quiet is actually quite bold and passionate when submitting her insightful ideas and thoughts of the subject (and believe me, she had many). And then of course there is Maili, a sassy-looking blithe girl, who can give you a long and sensible argument or lead you back on the right track while still playfully swinging on her chair (she did fell once). When most people in Education committee didn’t know each other before, then Signe and Kristen were friends before as they both study cultural management in Viljandi Culture

Academy. While you can see the two of them frantically laughing and joking, they can also get very down to business and serious all of a sudden. And then there is Annely (or Anni, as she prefers to be called) as mellow and sweet as she looks, whose idea of having naps just like in kindergarden seems more and more tempting during the session. The walls are so full of posters they look like wallpapers but if you look closer you see, that they are filled with innovational ideas and thoughts. Most of those people probably never went so deep into those issues before the session, but suddenly it seems to be crucial to them. Coffee breaks are getting shorter and there is no more playtime, but everybody is still so enthusiastic it’s almost infective. The blindfolds have been taken off.

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In the Name of Triine, Kaarle and the Holy Delegacy Marlene Timmi of the IR 1.1

In the beginning there was teambuilding and the team building was with the delegates, and teambuilding was the Delegates.


And teambuilding was with Trine. With Her all things were made, and without Her nothing was made that has been made.


And Kaarle was there, and in His glory He witnessed, that the delegates were good and innovation was strong with them.


And the Delegates were many and they were Eliza and Agnes and Meeri and Inken and Olena and Hando.


And by the end of the first day, the Team was built. And Observer, that is the journalist, looked upon it and saw that it was good.


And night fell and wine was poured and soon peace came down on Earth. And the Holy Delegates slept and they dreamt.

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And by the second morning there were four. And the four were Inken and Agnes and Meeri and Hando.


And the four gathered in the Temple that was four and zero and seven. And there they were reunited with Trine and Kaarle and they had the Voice.


And then they rested, for they had deserved it and the Resolution was ready. And night fell and wine was poured and soon peace came down on Earth.


And there they were told by the Voice: “Hear now, for you are given a task, and your task is to produce a resolution and it will be the best resolution, for we will make sure of it.�


And their work was done and Trine and Kaarle saw that it was good. And so it was.


And through the work they had done they gained friendships and courage and their voice was made heard and they were the ones who made it so.


And they had made change on Earth as they had in Heaven.



And the task was difficult and the work was great before them. But the Delegates were brave and came together as one and they began their work. And when the time was two and fifteen and it was time

to eat for they had come a long way. And when the time was nine and it was dark, they were finished.

In the name of Triine, Kaarle and the Holy Delegacy of IR. Amen!

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Human Rights Taken Maria Kristiina Prass To Pieces Human Rights is by definition a plural concept. How fitting then for our own Human Rights, the committee, to be made of lots of outstanding people. And I swear, with my hand on The Universal Declaration of Human Rights, outstanding they all are. The first thing the young bearded Maarek told me was the correct spelling of his name. MAAREK, double A. Being someone whose name is constantly misspelled, I understand his worry. Getting past that, Maarek is quite the character. He can occasionally be found eating his meals alone, deep in thought. To some, he might seem slow, his answer to even the most basic question may take a while, but make no mistake – he is just carefully thinking it through. An excellent quality, I say! Ah, the tiny redhead Mairi. You’ve seen her around, no doubt. She is bubbly and always talking, I imagine it’s impossible to have a dull moment

when she is around. A fun fact: she doesn’t like sweets and prefers fruit. Mairi is great, but I have doubts about anyone who doesn’t like chocolate. Then again, she does like to dance. I guess that balances it out. The first impression of Kaarel is very no-nonsense. When he stands, he stands in a very “military” pose. His gaze is serious and looks right AT you – the kind of look that you start to suspect you’ve done something wrong, even if you haven’t. Do not be fooled. By no means wouldn’t I recommend crossing him either way, but in reality, he is a talkative, genuine guy who’s life ambition is to have a big family, lots of kids. Ladies... Think about the tall girl with long dark blonde hair who always has a smile on her face. I know that girl, I can proudly say. She is Mari-Lii, the law student who goes against all law student stereotypes and, I’m fairly sure, is smiling even when sleeping. She also likes muscles, if you want to impress her. I highly recommend that you do, for she is wonderful. The tall blonde Siim is an interesting case as well. In teambuilding, I would have thought him to be a quiet kind of guy, but committee work proved something else entirely – he is opinionated, but very kind about it, never interrupting, never overpowering. A model delegate, really! Last but not least (of the delegates, anyway), we get to Aurora. Her name isn’t actually Aurora, but since no one here can pronounce her real name,

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she gracefully adopted a new one for us. Straight from Bejing, China, she is an infinite source of information on anything relating to her country. And she doesn’t mind talking about it, so DEFINITELY go ask her. I mean, how often do you get that opportunity?! Also, she is adorable. No one can resist adorable. And of course there is no missing Māris and Eeva-Liisa. The gentle leaders of the pack who effectively kept the topics from going too far out. Also, they announce coffee and lunch breaks, aka provide access to food AND coffee. This alone grants them our love. Sadly, we also had one loss in our group. Some of you may have been in

EYP long enough to remember what Uku, El Presidente, looked like without a beard (I know you thought his beard is like Chuck Norris’s, there from birth, but not quite so). No, the loss wasn’t the beard. It was Peeter-Paul – the charming Japanese-and-Chinese-speaking young man who could have entered an Uku Talmar lookalike competition and won even against Uku himself. As tragic as the loss was, the group pushed through and ended up with an amazing resolution nevertheless. So there we have it – my beautiful eight-faceted Human Rights Committee. If you spent time with them like I did, you know how easy it is to like them. If you didn’t - your loss and your loss only!

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Cast: Kristjan the Broadway Musical about Johnny Cash’s “Ring of Fire” in C flat Selene the mighty Warrior Jaan the Level 26 Thiefling Ivar the Glorious of Oopius Matthjis the Honest Marko the level 24 Undead Mage Jane Always-Sticks-to-the-Shadows Gatis – The Prime Evil Annika – Not-so-Prime-but-still-pretty-darn-Evil Evil

The adventure of the three kingdoms Villu Viirsalu An ancient evil has awoken. The most vicious of them all, The Prime Evil. Though he has risen before and has been vanquished all the same. The Great Gatis power reign supreme. Only a bande of misfits could save the day. Deep in the catacombs of Mt. Doom, four adventurers march bravely forth, against the impending doom. Matthjis the Honest, Jane the Always-Sticksto-the-Shadows, Warrior Selene and Ivar of Oopius. When walking through a caves, one must not be stopped by measly traps. For this task, there is no one more skilled than Matthjis. “I check for traps” he shouts after each step. “You find no traps” the cave whispers back, “I found no traps”, he repeats every time. After a tedious trek through a cave filled with an eerie dank stench of your common troll, filled with no traps, the four of them arrive to a great big door of solid steel. “I look for a hidden passage” whispers Jane. Silent echoes of the cave respond, “You

find no hidden passage”. With no other way past, Selene takes her mighty sidearm and fiercely slashes through the door. “You deal 4 damage, door is dead.” is all that can be heard when the door falls. What opens up to them is a large cavern filled with demonspawn. In seconds, all came to stop. The mighty paladin of Oopius, Ivar the Glorious could not stand for this insolence. No demon shall walk past him. “I cast level 3 Daylight. With my added bonus of Potion of the Holy, It is now a level 4 Daylight”. Strange voice echoes back once more. “You rolled 20, natural critical. All trolls turn to stone”. Hazaa A melodic tune catches our heroes ears. It seems they had a prisoner here. The great Bard, Kristjan. Hazaaa. But all is not yet done. The five adventurers travel further down the cavern, through the tainted caves.

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---2 hours later--A large hall opens to our heroes. Crystal chandalier hangs low from the ceiling, two curved stairs run upwards. At the top of them, two brothers await. A level 26 thiefling, Jaan, and level 24 Sorcerer, Marko. *poof* *magic* The thiefling was gone in a magic mist. “I summon a level 2 fire elemental” the Sorcerer yells. With a great eruption, molten lava started taking form.

“NO!” shouted the bard, “CAN YOU NOT!”, and with it, he pulled all the strings on his lute. With a melody to melt ears, he was struck from behind by the thiefling who vanished once more in a pinkish smoke. Rushing to his aid, Ivar cast a healing spell. “you rolled 5, you managed to heal only the wound on his knee”. Meanwhile, Jane was sticking to the shadows and avoiding all the ruckus, she managed to activate something forbidden. The Evil of Gatis. He is here. He is free. End of part 2.

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The committee with a ghostJoonas Tepp The topic of citizenship presents itself with countless ways to steer the conversations towards the extremes. Even if the discussion is confined by a clear topic, which in this case was using new technologies to increase the cooperation between a government and it’s citizens. There has been enough happening in the world to fuel a heated debate on this topic. What’s happening in and with Russia alone could span all the topics presented this Session and there would still be plenty left to fight about. That was what I was expecting to see when I first divvied up various stereotypical roles to each member on the first day (without them knowing, of course), based solely on their conduct during team building. It was all figured out, from the leader to the wild card, only to be thrown out of the window the next day. Suddenly my theories about who’s going to end up in the biggest contention with whom are void. The six of them turn out to be an incredibly efficient faction, sharing their views, discussing

things systematically and making their way toward the final resolution. Any divergence from the main issue is almost impossible, with Karl putting his teacher knowhow to work. Conflicting points of view are talked through and taken into consideration, so there’s really no serious disputes. No yelling and no drama. One might be tempted to call the committee boring, but what’s boring about efficiency? Especially when coupled with sensible personalities, each with their own unique facets to explore. Be it something personal, like finding out you have a sister through Facebook or more thematically relevant, like knowing the best blogs about the goings-on at the European Union institutions. Any signs of exhaustion and stress are swiftly taken care of

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by throwaway sarcasm and humor, whether it’s from Andres, Brent or anyone else feeling witty. In spite of working like a well oiled machine, some of the delegate’s opinions were bound to be divided. The way they bridged those divides will be the defining factor in their final resolution. Not a single person was left out, except those who decided to step out of the discussion voluntarily. Like the mysterious seventh member of the committee, who kept disappearing and reappearing like a ghost or a figment of imagination. But even despite his uctuating presence, Eero managed to combine his particular view of the world to the discussions at hand.

God forbid if any of the aforementioned delegates decide to step in to politics. Bringing about change through civil discussion and negotiations, instead of backroom deals and shady actions. Can we really allow the shapers of our society to be methodical and effective, as the committee has shown themselves to be. What would we be without a constant pessimistic view towards politics and politicians - the one thing still bringing peace of mind to the otherwise overworked Eastern European. Knowing that someone higher up the ladder is actively working against you is just the thing keeping our hopes and dreams at bay. Without that, we might actually be happy and honestly, who needs that. I mean we already have naked ladies running in our cities, what else do we need.


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Candy Jar Openers Martin Laidla (CJOs) You may have tasted the tip of the iceberg of this session but that’s not even close to what has really been going on. The leading machinery and clockwork of every EYP session is made up of CJOs. Some may just call them candy jar openers but the guys and gals hiding behind those three letters are chairpersons, journalists and organisers and they are responsible for everything that’s been happening. According to a sociological participant observation study conducted during our session, the work that most delegates think CJOs are doing has no correlation with the reality. One cannot simply estimate the amount of effort put into making a session happen before it has even started: chairs need to get smart on their committee topics, journalists have to write pre-session articles, organisers have to calculate the amount of Nutella needed and do some other minor stuff.

The study also indicates that there are deep lateral functions behind every action the CJOs make. For example the seemingly meaningless chit-chat texting on their phones or computers that one could have seen them do is actually part of their undercover coop network. So basically everything you said during committee work might have been reported to others, analysed, judged and remembered. This surveillance certainly might not have been so 1984-ish but it really bears an important function of firsthand feedback between the chairs and wise men and woman of the board - the latter being the ones who actually move all the chair-pawns on the playfield of committee work. The study also expressed the importance of the aforementioned officials in the top secret process of committee resolution pimping in which every word in every sentence gets a new more logical place and 30 inch rims. To go on with uncovering “behind the curtains” work of organisers, can one even imagine the massive amount of time it takes to make Nutella sandwiches to each and every participant? Or what kind of willpower it takes to not eat all the chips and bagels before bringing them to the session? The amazing skills of

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trickery needed to make the participants pay the event fee and on top of that persuade them that if they come and ride on their city line bus then it’s ticket-controller safe? As one can see, there was massive planning and the plans were even more massive. Oh and by the way, have you ever thought about how much training and hard work it takes for the journalists to learn the skill of never sleeping and always funny? As one could have gathered from this short overview of the underwater side of the session making iceberg, there has been an immense amount of effort from the active youth of Estonia put into the happening of this session. One cannot look at the notion of chairs photobombing their committee’s intense group work photos and not think that there is nothing else behind it other than the need to get on the picture. The question left unanswered in the study thus is that do all of the actions the ever-awesome CJOs make bear in itself a signal of greater importance that is incomprehensible to everyone else? Can a small cough of the president at the General As-

sembly be a sing for the organisers to run in with some more Nutella sandwiches? What did the chairs communicate to their journalists when one of them was sitting and other was not? What does the fox really say? That and many more you can only find it out if you continue coming to the sessions.

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