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Executive Officers _______________ Chief Executive Officer (CEO): Jumpman Lane™ Co-Chiefs of Operations (COO): Sole Jie, Kimber Martinek and Dokan Dryssen Chief Financial Officer (CFO)and President: Lusciouslumpchunks McMillian Chief Technical Officer (CTO): Didi Tripsa Chief Information Officer (CIO): Veronica2vixen Devoix Chief Strategy Officer (CSO): Kriztyne Ballinger Editrix, Jumpman Lane™ 's Slut Magazine™: Candace Flossberg

Division Heads ____________ Executive Vice President of Slut Mag TV™: Tara Porterfield Executive Vice President of House Slut™: annie Juran Executive Vice President of Slut Mag Strategic Marketing™: Zooey Kohime Executive Vice President of Slut Mag Security Services™: Tear Thor Executive Vice President of Slut Mag Capital and Corporate Studies™: Charlimeg Meili Executive Vice President of Slut Mag Public Relations™: Executive Vice President of Events: Bendoverann Stoop Executive Vice President without portfolio: Gweenzy String , DJQuad Radio Editorial: Founder, Publisher Jumpman Lane™ Editrix-in-Chief, Candace Flossburg (Ms. Can. Flo.) Layout Editrix, annie Juran Circulation Editrix, G String Editrix-at-Large, Roxana Fouquet Editrix-at-Large, Bendoverann Stoop Editrix-at-Large, Veronica2vixen Devoix

Covergirl: Priscila Balogh

Reportors and Photographers Sillie Schmooz Kryztine Ballinger Dokan Dryssen Krystel Sands Sole Jie Jessica Gelbhard Vila Demonge Jumpman Lane’s Slut Magazine© All rights reserved Volume 3: Issue 5 Aug/Sept 2009 http://www.slutmaginc.com slutmagazine@slutmaginc.com

Interns Bruco Sartre Silyguse Aeon Ambrosia Camino Colton Jigsaw

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Ok, when the CFO and President of Slut Mag Inc™ wanta something, she gets it! Even if it's to be a porn peddling chicken farmer!

It all started with IMs from several friends asking if I was interested in taking some sionchickens and/or eggs. They all said its fun, they are cute, easy to take care of, profitable, and everyone is doing it..lol. Hmm right there I should have ran screaming, crushing sionchickens eggs with my Moody's as I went. Instead I decided why not? After all according to the sionchicken literature these chickens need very little care and upkeep..a joy to own..PFFT!!

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I started with some eggs and food from my BFF Sassypants, and set out a freebie chicken pen and proceeded to open the egg instead of touch it, inadvertently performing a autopsy on the poor defenseless egg..OOPS!! After successfully placing a few eggs I waited anxiously for something to happen..hmm maybe its like a watched pot ..idk ..anyways soon enough I ended up with a few cute lil balls of fluff, to which Jumpman promptly IMed me to tell me get rid of the stupid things, since they were wreaking havoc on the entire sim..


.so ok, I go to remove my chickens, and oh did I mention in order to move these little 9 prim lovelies you need something called a SionChicken Transport Box, reasonably priced at 20l per set of 10, to which I thought not too bad, just a few lindens, how little I knew at the time...lmfao Where was I? ohh on to moving these lil things, hmmm..where the hell are they? maybe I should have set them to home..o.0, after some searching I could only find 2, leaving one out there to terrorize other sims, and promptly forgot about it, until.. I started receiving these messages telling me I had a wayward bird somewheres, following the link, I found the bird starved dead in Slut! Mag waters...at least death by sea is dignified and romantic..:) Now..from the time these guys are hatched until they are ready to breed is a few weeks and within that time they gotta eat and with each chicken eating approximately 150 servings of food per week and one large bowl holding 300 servings and one large bowl set containing 16 bowls costs 1440l..phew!! ohh shit..this is getting expensive..o.0.. Now unto the wonderful world of chicken breeding.. my main breeders are named Sassypants, Fredonia and Squishy(named after my wonderful and generous boss) ..well Squish went to work right away, knocking up Fredonia promptly..YAY! my 1st chicken egg..ohh shit.. now, you have to protegg these eggs or they hatch more 9prim babies that eat more food and take up space so.. I purchased a set of Proteggors at 40l for a set of 20..jikes!! So now I am stuck with chickens, eggs and an ever growing food and accessory bill. Hmm so much for them being fun, easy to care for and the biggest lie Sion Zaius is telling... PROFITABLE...seems to me the only person getting rich off all this is Sion himself, rumor has it this person has made enough of to purchase himself a new rl house off his brilliant marketing of these sionchickens..but I don't hate, in fact I'd like to shake his hand for thinking up something so profitable and geez I'd like to ask him here..Sion Zaius..Would you marry me?? pretty pwease with sionchicken eggs on it??

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Just kidding there as I partnered the wonderful DjQuad Radio on the 27th of August..we reconnected again over our mutual foray into the wonderful world of chickens, heres a few snaps of us taking a break from a long day of slinging sionchicken crap..:) soo thank you Sion, I found love thanks to your evil chicken pyramid scheme and for that alone its all been worth it...so till next month bitches... Coming next month Part 2 in Lushys Experiment... Selling all these freaking eggs!!

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More of theW-hat style invasion of Gor We been trying to do this story for two years. Here we Go again! We goin in! Here’s more of this crap lmao!

9:30 9:30 9:30 9:30 9:30 9:30 9:30 9:31 9:31 9:31 9:31 9:31 9:31 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:32 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:33 9:34 9:34

DJQuad Radio: oh the out of character dude DJQuad Radio: got it Jumpman Lane: yup dancermonica Exonar: i walked around Veronica2vixen Devoix: bling off DJQuad Radio: i'm officially ready to do some observin Anika Mureaux: okay! Veronica2vixen Devoix: ok lol Jumpman Lane: we should observe DJQuad Radio: smacks her ass dancermonica Exonar: ooooh I like the pink ... that is cute Jumpman Lane: dancer means u foo DJQuad Radio: hehe i just emoted Anika Mureaux: is OOC??? Jumpman Lane: gonna see some goreens! Anika Mureaux: why is it OOC? DJQuad Radio: OOG? Anika Mureaux: that could mean someone died =/ Jumpman Lane: wtf is that Anika Mureaux: like rl died DJQuad Radio: they need a clearer font Jumpman Lane: i cant read that shit Jumpman Lane: wtf did it say Veronica2vixen Devoix: we should hold hands lol Jumpman Lane: dancer come on Veronica2vixen Devoix: in cas one of us gets lost DJQuad Radio: i'd suggest verdana Veronica2vixen Devoix: or they make quad a gore slut DJQuad Radio: oooo Jumpman Lane: hehehehehe Veronica2vixen Devoix: lol Anika Mureaux: oh west then east DJQuad Radio: i'll be your slut Jumpman Lane shouts: dancer MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Lyric Demina (19m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: dancermonica Exonar (19m) DJQuad Radio shouts: brb 5 min. i'll catch up. lord keep me safe MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Veronica2vixen Devoix

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Jumpman Lane: where the goreens at? Veronica2vixen Devoix: i have no idea Anika Mureaux: west and then north! MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: kadriya Sparta (19m) Jumpman Lane: whty dontu danc over to em lol dancermonica Exonar is Offline MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: kadriya Sparta (2m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Veronica2vixen Devoix (7m) Jumpman Lane: think we need a tp lmao kadriya Sparta shouts: greetings Veronica2vixen Devoix: i think quad got kid naped kadriya Sparta shouts: welcome to teveh Jumpman Lane: heheheh no doubt MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Anika Mureaux (1m), Veronica2vixen Devoix (2m) Anika Mureaux: oops sorry Jumpman Lane: ok lead us to them gorren MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Jemsyn Inglewood (18m), Anika Mureaux (19m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: kadriya Sparta (17m) kadriya Sparta: how are you this nice sunday kadriya Sparta: greetings kajira Jemsyn Inglewood: I am well, thank you. Jumpman Lane: hi kadriya Sparta: its not that comum people greets observer Veronica2vixen Devoix: ya she pretty kadriya Sparta: but we do have a nice comunity here Jumpman Lane: really? Anika Mureaux: greeting, I have the honour to lead these free around here, Master Jumpman is the publisher of a magazine! kadriya Sparta: are you all interested in GOR, or just visitng Jemsyn Inglewood: This is my first visit to Gor...beautifully realised... Jumpman Lane: were innerested kadriya Sparta: ohhhhh thats great kajira Jumpman Lane: and man ur hot kadriya Sparta: this one is called Angel kadriya Sparta: who is your name Jumpman Lane: would yer master let u pose for pictures? Anika Mureaux: I have been named Tiddles by my Master kadriya Sparta: aye, nice to meet you Tiddles kadriya Sparta: nice to meet you all kadriya Sparta: pictures???? Jemsyn Inglewood: I serve a great and powerful Mistress myself, no doubt an alien concept to you. :) Anika Mureaux: Humm... where did Master Quad disappear to anyway? Veronica2vixen Devoix: yess she is GOrgoues kadriya Sparta: well, i will let you walk around them kadriya Sparta: you all are in a very good hands Anika Mureaux: Angel, would you have an idea what direction to walk to see the usual 'panther chased by outlaws chased by panther chased by warrior'? kadriya Sparta: hehe, you are in the right land Tiddles kadriya Sparta: we are mercenaries here Anika Mureaux: aah kadriya Sparta: and the sims after this one is garriosn kadriya Sparta: all panthers there kadriya Sparta: 30 people this morning Anika Mureaux nods and eyeballs around.. not unparanoidly. kadriya Sparta: come follow me Anika Mureaux: thanks Jemsyn Inglewood: Thank you. Anika Mureaux: tiddles release Stability Indicator (4prim) (V1.51) ;63;0;3489: WARNING : Lag out of control in North Point ( 11.98% ) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: DJQuad Radio (11m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Jemsyn Inglewood (18m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Anika Mureaux (1m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: DJQuad Radio (19m) MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: kadriya Sparta (1m), Veronica2vixen Devoix (2m), Niko Hawker (5m), Jemsyn Inglewood (5m), shadow Ghost (13m) Niko Hawker: Its ok Ruby my bad MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: DJQuad Radio (16m) shadow Ghost: ((sorry froze) DJQuad Radio: sorry had to pee and get a hot pocket. i'm ready to continue Niko Hawker: Tal All, Safe Paths MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: DJQuad Radio (18m) DJQuad Radio: no shit dancermonica Exonar is Online MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Jemsyn Inglewood (17m), Anika Mureaux (18m), kadriya Sparta (19m) kadriya Sparta: on my back you can go to vosk river and askaris Anika Mureaux: Rive de Bois is nearby too, right? kadriya Sparta: have a good walk kaena Hellmann is Offline Anika Mureaux: I wish you well, Angel, serve with fire yep MystiTool HUD 1.3.1: Entering chat range: Veronica2vixen Devoix (16m)

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By Jumpman Lane Straight up grid vic. Griefer-bait.This Granny woman rl has been whinin and cryin about all feet been in her crack since day one.

Whoever makes these damn things is a genius; so, natch HE aint a shitball. The turdy lil' bird himself for damn sure IS. My ex-girlfriend Sassypants Writer (who incidentally wanted HER ex-husdand's new wife to be this month's shitball; but' I don't know the turd and don't have an axe to grind with my ex's ex's new wife...let's just say she is this month's shitball runner-up). Well...my ex Sassypants gave her best friend forever My president and CFO Lusciouslumpchunks McMillian some scion chickens. My already lagged out HQ up in the chicken farming frenzy (EXCEPT my ex sim, Slut Mag Isle went through a bigger Sassy as she'd surely kill me!) with the lag free shitstorm then when I left my dog Turd battle cry: " See here, turdmunch! roaming when I logged off and he kept You're nothing but a stinkin' chicken farmer! bumping into the carpet. needless to say we banned them damn chickens and with great glee hold up to scorn all the turds caught TM

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Follow the forums site for future deets on all our umpcoming activities. http://www.slutmaginc.com.

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House Slut our store is now open, an inside look! Even more Fun with Gor We dont know WHO on the cover! All the inside details! About house slut and they r a dousy! THE RESSURECTION OF S.L.U.T. Our porn union Inside look at our forums Interlibber Braut6igan feature interview If the Lindens let him back and much much more of the same. We're BACK!

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slut mag vol3 ish5  

Jumpman Lane's Slut Magazine Volume Three Issue Five aug/sept

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