Ron’s personal story and encouragement for those facing autism’s unique challenges. Fathers in the Field
By Pam S. Walker
How John Smithbaker’s ministry introduces fatherless boys to God’s unfailing love.
Where do we turn when our fathers fall short of our expectations? Here’s what Joyce discovered.
2025 Writing Contest Now Open
This year’s topic: Trust and Obey Share a time you stepped out in faith, obeyed God, and the outcome of that
When Dads Stand Tall
The undeniable blessings of having a Moms, Dads, and Grads Gifts and resources for the special people
When My Dad Ran Away
By Amanda Harding
The search for her true identity is
Religious Freedom in Mexico
By Michelle Adserias
Sandison
Photo provided by Ron Sandison
THE FINE PRINT
Obedience
Have you ever considered how many pivotal moments in Scripture hinged on one person’s decision to obey God?
What if Noah had decided, at any point in his 120-year ark-building journey, he’d had enough and quit? What if Joseph hadn’t run away from Potipher’s wife? As we know, the immediate consequences of his obedience weren’t great. However, God used that moment to position Joseph to save not only the people of Egypt from famine, but his own family. What if Moses had refused to return to Egypt to lead God’s people back to Abraham’s land? What if Joseph, Jesus’ earthly father, had refused to listen to the Heavenly Father’s angelic messenger and refused to flee to Egypt with Mary and Jesus?
Of course, God assigned these tasks (and many others) to men and women He knew would follow Him in faithful obedience. What empowered them to follow God, even though they couldn’t see where their paths were leading? Faith. A deep-rooted conviction they could entrust everything to their unfailing, unchanging, all-knowing God.
And if their faith had failed them and they hadn’t obeyed God? God’s purposes would have been accomplished a different way, through different people. Like Samson and Saul and Judas Iscariot, they would have missed out on God’s fullest blessings and lived with the consequences of their choices.
I find these biblical accounts sobering. I can look back on moments in my life when I obeyed God and enjoyed His blessings. There are also times I chose to disobey God, by doing what He commanded me not to do or by not doing what the Holy Spirit was leading me to do. I didn’t trust God enough. I still carry the scars of some of those decisions. Were it not for God’s mercy, forgiveness and redemptive nature, I would still carry the regrets, as well. I am so thankful God takes even our weak moments and ultimately uses them for His own purposes.
So, the theme for this year’s writing contest is “Trust and Obey.” Take a moment to read the details on page 16 (or at www.todayschristianliving.com) and consider sharing your story.
In this issue, we’re looking at the vital roll father’s play in our lives — those who are obedient followers of Christ and those who are not. With each story, we have a reminder our Heavenly Father never fails us.
“And I will be a father to you, and you shall be sons and daughters to Me,” says the Lord Almighty.”
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Author Ron Sandison Offers Hope for the Autism Journey
By Stephanie Rische
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, more than 5 million adults in the United States are living with autism spectrum disorder. While children may have ready access to resources, that support may be less available as they age out of various programs. Young adults with autism often struggle with life transitions such as getting a job, building healthy relationships, and living independently.
Ron Sandison, author of Adulting on the Spectrum, has firsthand experience with these struggles. He received an autism diagnosis as a child and benefited from the support of a loving, involved family. But life after school presented
Award-winning keynote speaker Ron Sandison, addressing moms of kids with disabilities at the 2016 Healing Complex Kids conference. (All photos provided by Ron and Kristen Sandison.)
additional challenges. “Many people like me experience delays with all the milestones, and we often struggle to get to adulthood. I didn’t graduate from high school until age 20. I didn’t have a meaningful relationship until age 35. The things most people take for granted don’t come easily for those on the spectrum.”
Statistics back this up: Only three percent of those with autism are employed. Of those employed, only 20 percent have a full-time job. Life expectancy is just 54 years old. “People on the spectrum often struggle to understand social skills, integrate into workplace culture, and build relationships. One of my goals is to teach people to recognize their strengths and use them to accommodate for their weakness. I want to help them develop skills that help them thrive, not just survive.”
A Foundation of Support
Ron’s parents sought support for him from a young age. “I had a significant speech delay. When I was seven years old, my brother introduced me to people by saying, ‘I think he’s from Norway.’ People couldn’t understand me.” In addition to speech therapy, his parents also exposed him to many different environments to help him learn to adapt to different settings.
“Before I was born, my mom was an art teacher. Then she became a full-time Ron teacher. I had dyslexia and was a visual learner, so she used art to teach me.” His struggles with sensory issues made unfamiliar situations overwhelming for him. “I once beat up a clown at a Cub Scout event. But over time, my parents helped me manage my emotions. I learned to identify my triggers and I discovered that I could control emotions instead of letting them control me.”
As he grew up, Ron was bullied and struggled to fit in with his peers. A turning point came when he discovered track, which served as a healthy outlet and provided a means of connection. “I think it’s especially important for people on the
spectrum to be involved in group activities. As Proverbs 27:17 says, we need other people to support us and sharpen us. As I won medals and interacted with my teammates, it helped me develop confidence and self-esteem.”
“God Is Doing Something Big”
Ron grew up in a Christian home, but when he was a teenager, he wandered from the faith. “I was feeling disconnected –I wanted to fit in, and I started hanging around with the wrong crowd.” Then a classmate invited him to church. “She told me God was doing big things. I went to a Wednesday evening service and gave my life to the Lord.” That evening, Ron felt God’s call: I’ve called you to be an evangelist and to memorize my Word. He immediately started memorizing Scripture. In high school, he memorized more than 2,000 verses. (He has now memorized 15,000 Bible verses.)
“I think an important part of anyone’s faith journey is having a mentor — someone who can refine your gifts and teach you how to thrive in your workplace and church and relationships. I got connected with a ministry leader who became my mentor. He’s the one who taught me how to memorize the Bible.”
God Hears; God Sees
In Ron’s senior year of high school, he was three months past the age to compete in high school athletics, according to rules in the state of Michigan. “My mom contacted the high school sports association, but they wouldn’t budge. I was so discouraged. Mom told me, ‘All we can do is pray.’ I held on to Psalm 25:3 during this time: ‘No one who hopes in you will ever be put to shame.’”
Ron’s parents met with another high school athlete who was in a similar situation and an article was published about both of them in the Detroit Free Press. Beyond that, there seemed to be no further steps to take. All they could do was hope.
That spring, Ron decided to get baptized. “After I came out of the water, the pastor said, ‘I saw something — it was an image out of Joel 2:25, about how God is going to repay the years the locusts have eaten.’” When Ron and his family got home from church, there was a message on their answering machine. “The time was 9 a.m., the same time I was coming out of the water. It was a young lawyer who said he’d take my case pro bono. We won the case, and I was able to compete in the race.”
That moment was significant in Ron’s journey of faith. He knew God didn’t have to answer his prayer, but it was a reminder that even when hope seemed futile, God saw him and loved him and was advocating on his behalf.
A New Set of Challenges
Ron went away to college, which represented a new stage of maturity — and a new set of challenges. “I wasn’t able to rely on my mom and dad in the same way. I had to build new connections and learn more independence.” He describes one of the biggest challenges of leaving home: developing a hope complex. “People with autism feel like things will never change, no matter how hard they try. I needed to believe that when I begin something, I can carry it out to completion.”
Young Ron with his mother and teacher, Miss Michelle.
Ron credits his parents with preparing him to launch successfully, one skill at a time. “A baby eagle is comfortable in its nest, but it will never learn to fly if it stays there. That’s why the mother eagle moves the feathers out, one at a time, until the chick gets uncomfortable. The process is similar for parents of a child with autism. It’s important to do this process slowly and teach your child skills so they’re ready to soar.”
After some trial and error along the way, Ron now holds a full-time job. “My dad has a strong work ethic, as Scripture talks about: ‘The one who is unwilling to work shall not eat’” (2 Thessalonians 3:10). Although Ron’s dad instilled this work ethic in him, Ron wasn’t gainfully employed until age 32. “For me, the biggest challenge was understanding the culture of the workplace. I used to spew out any thought that came into my mind. Now I’ve learned to pause and filter first. I ask myself, Does this need to be said? Is this going to build someone up? How will this be interpreted?”
Ron and his wife, Kristen, have been married for 12 years, and they have an eight-year-old daughter. One of the most significant lessons he has learned through these relationships is adaptability. “People on the spectrum tend to struggle with mind-blindness — we don’t understand what other people are
thinking. But being in a close relationship, like marriage, helps us see things from another person’s perspective.”
Similarly, being a parent has required a deeper level of flexibility. “People on the spectrum love routines, but I’ve discovered that kids ruin routines. Relationships force you to come out of your shell. It’s like a turtle: By sticking your neck out of your shell, you can accomplish amazing things.”
Encouragement for Those on the Spectrum
Ron sees it as his calling to encourage people on the spectrum, along with their families. While there are genuine challenges along the way, God can use you and your family for His Kingdom purposes. “It’s more politically incorrect to tell someone with autism they can’t talk about their pet interest in the Bible than it is to talk about the Bible. In that way, my autism is my superpower, allowing me to go where no one else is allowed to go and talk about what no one else is allowed to talk about.”
To those on the spectrum, Ron offers this advice: “Take advantage of every opportunity. The more places you go and the more people you meet, the more you’ll understand social skills and experience success.” To parents of someone on the spectrum, he offers this encouragement: “Never give up. Even
Ron addresses the children at Brewster Elementary School.
if your child is making slow progress, if they’re heading in the right direction, they’ll get there. Delay doesn’t mean denial.”
Ron sums up his final words of wisdom with these words by Charles Spurgeon: “By perseverance the snail made it on the ark.”
Stephanie Rische edits and writes in the Chicago area, where she lives with her husband and two sons. When she isn’t chasing down commas or little boys, she blogs at stephanierische.com Her memoir, I Was Blind (Dating), but Now I See, recounts how God surprised her with His grace and love.
ADULTING ON THE SPECTRUM
Ron describes his new book, Adulting on the Spectrum, as being “for people with autism, by someone with autism, in a way they can take in information.” This is Ron’s fourth book, and before he begins writing each one, he prays, “God, don’t make me write the book; make me live the book.”
His latest book includes helpful teaching and practical tips on topics such as building and maintaining friendships, creating a healthy lifestyle, avoiding the pitfalls of dating, and managing emotions and sensory issues. “Since people on the spectrum tend to learn by example, I’ve included 20 stories about people with autism who have experienced success and contribute meaningfully to the world.”
This book also features reflective questions and fun activities, with Ron’s faith journey integrated throughout. “People with autism tend to be visual learners, so my writing style helps them get past the ‘autistic fog.’” This resource will ease the transition to adulthood and help readers manage the nuanced aspects of life with autism.
The Good News
Aman was accused of murder and brought before a judge. The man admitted his guilt, the jury found him guilty, and the judge pronounced his sentence with deep sorrow: the death penalty.
The guilty man was his own son. Despite the judge’s deep love for him, he could not dismiss the charges or avert the penalty. He must uphold the law or be a corrupt, unjust judge.
He was caught in a heart-wrenching dilemma. Then he thought of a solution. The judge stepped down, removed his robe, and exchanged places with his son. He was executed in his son’s place.
That’s what Jesus, in His grace and mercy, did for us when he died on the cross. He was not guilty but paid the penalty for our guilt; he was sinless but paid the price for our sin.
God’s forgiveness is available to anyone who will own, ask forgiveness for, and turn away from their sin (repent) and put their hope, faith, and trust in Christ alone. Only His blood, shed on the cross, can wash away the guilt of our sin so we can forever enjoy God’s forgiveness and fellowship.
The question is, will you accept God’s free gift? It’s only a sincere prayer away. If you’d like to find new life in Christ, tell God you are sorry for your past wrongs and want Him to be your Lord and Savior. He’ll send the Holy Spirit to live in you, guide you, and change you from the inside out.
“It is by grace you have been saved through faith — and this is not through yourselves, it is the gift of God — not of works, so that no one can boast” —Ephesians 2:8-9.
The Sandison family visiting Holland, Michigan.
Jerry Rose is an internationally known Christian broadcaster and is former president/ CEO of the Total Living Network. He currently serves as TLN’s chairman of the board and hosts the Emmy awardwinning program
Significant Living. Jerry is an ordained minister and the author of five books, including Deep Faith for Dark Valleys and Significant Living, coauthored with his wife, Shirley. He is the past president of the National Religious Broadcasters and currently serves on its board of directors. Jerry is an avid golfer, equestrian, photographer, and grandfather of 20.
Shirley Rose has been in ministry with her husband, Jerry, for more than 30 years. Her career in Christian television focused on hosting several programs, including the Emmy Award-winning women’s program
Aspiring Women. She has authored five books, including The Eve Factor, A Wise Woman Once Said…, and Significant Living, and has contributed to numerous anthologies and periodicals. She is actively pursuing her calling to help other women through writing, speaking, and hosting women’s groups in her home. Her favorite pastimes are country line dancing, travel, and spending time with her 20 grandchildren.
By Jerry and Shirley Rose
Christians in the Culture
Watching the news or reading a newspaper nowadays can be a frustrating, even bewildering, experience. America, and the world for that matter, has not only lost its moral compass but has lost touch with reality. While oases of journalistic integrity do still exist, the majority have abandoned any pretense of a belief in God. Instead, they have become passionately anti-God. This anti-God spirit is not only prevalent in the media, it has taken over politics. At the same time, antisemitism has taken over university campuses worldwide. Though this movement is increasing, it isn’t new. Christianity has always been a target in the media, politics and the public at large. One thing I’ve learned during my years in Christian media is that Christians cannot always expect fair or objective treatment from their critics.
I’m reminded of a personal experience from the mid ’70s as the general manager of a faithbased TV channel in Dallas, Texas. A local radio personality stirred up quite a public debate on whether God can and does heal today. In the midst of the controversy, I was asked to do an interview on television. I agreed to the interview but suspected the host was coming with an antiChristian agenda. With that in mind, I tried to answer her questions carefully, to prevent creative editing from distorting my answers and changing my meaning. I failed miserably.
She did come with an agenda. Her story was a first-rate journalistic hit job that made me and all those who believe in divine healing look foolish. I was furious with the reporter and, in my anger, I was ready to call her and unload my fury. Thankfully, before calling, I did what I always recommend before responding to someone in anger. I prayed. It was a simple prayer and, in my mind, completely justified. “Lord,” I said, “I don’t ask for much. I only want to be dealt with fairly and objectively, and this reporter didn’t.” In that moment the Lord very gently, but clearly, rebuked me in a way I’ve never forgotten.
Who are you? Was I dealt with fairly and objectively? Were the apostles dealt with fairly and objectively?” I never made that call.
Jesus left his Heavenly Father and came to earth to bring salvation and eternal life to all who would believe in Him. Yet he was rejected and reviled and put to death by the very people He came
to redeem. Then His disciples, who committed themselves to carry Jesus’ message to the world, suffered the same fate. They certainly weren’t dealt with fairly and objectively. So, who are we to expect the world to understand us and treat us fairly? That understanding is the work of the spirit.
1 Corinthians 2:13-14 says:
“When we tell you these things, we do not use words that come from human wisdom. Instead, we speak words given to us by the Spirit, using the Spirit’s words to explain spiritual truths. But people who aren’t Christians can’t understand or accept these truths from God’s Spirit. It all sounds foolish to them, and they can’t understand it.”
That reporter was not a Christian and completely lacked spiritual understanding. She was antagonistic against anything to do with faith in God and my interview was an opportunity to vent her skepticism and disrespect. There was no concern for my feelings or interest in my faith. How should I have responded? The carnal part of me wanted to angrily put her in her place. But as a Christian, I should be better than that. I should be concerned for her and pray for her redemption. That’s what Jesus would do. After three years of rejection, hanging on a cross, near death, and suffering unimaginable pain Jesus prayed, “Father, forgive them; for they do not know what they are doing” Luke 23:34
Since that experience, godlessness has increased to an almost unimaginable level. It is true that there has always been persecution in some parts of the world. But who could have believed there would come a time in America when Christians would be ridiculed, lose their jobs, called haters and domestic terrorists, and even go to jail for their faith?
Our call is to reflect Jesus in our daily lives — even when we are treated unfairly. It’s not easy, but we should strive to mirror Jesus and respond with love and grace. We should pray that the Holy Spirit will open their minds to the reality of Christ. There is no place for retaliation or hateful rhetoric. Finally, while keeping informed is important, the news should never leave us fearful or anxious. Our peace comes from knowing who holds the future.
Remember even the worst of sinners are not our enemies, they are our mission.
Fathers in the Field
Reaching
Fatherless Boys Through Faith-Filled
Adventure
By Pam S. Walker
John Smithbaker knows a few things about forgiveness. For years, he longed for a relationship with the father who abandoned his mother when she was pregnant with him, along with his three-year-old sister. That longing dug deep into his soul and drove him to work harder and find fulfillment in earthly things. For 40 years, he held tightly to one sin that he seemed unable to give up — the unforgiveness of his earthly father.
One night while driving to meet his Uncle Bucky for a fishing trip, he felt an overwhelming sensation and pulled his truck to the side of the road, got on his knees, and begged for God’s forgiveness. He saw his horrible earthly sins flash before him
and heard the Heavenly Father saying to him, “John, now you need to forgive your earthly father for abandoning you.” That night, he put his faith and trust in Christ.
When he got home, he wrote and mailed a “forgiveness” letter to his dad. He told him how, through the power of Christ, he forgave him and even shared the gospel with him. However, the outcome was not what he was hoping for. His father said he didn’t believe in God and never took responsibility for leaving his family. Shortly after, his father passed away from cancer.
For Smithbaker, his journey to share the power in forgiveness was just the beginning. It served as the catalyst to launch Fathers in the Field, a ministry committed to sharing God’s love with boys deeply wounded by fathers who had abandoned
Fathers in the Field founders, John Smithfield and Scott MacNaughton. (Photos used with permission from Fathers in the Field.)
them. He began the ministry while serving as CEO of a leading manufacturer of outdoor adventure products and incorporated his love for God’s creation into the ministry for these hurting boys.
After starting Fathers in the Field, his pastor, Scott McNaughton, became the ministry’s first missionary. Also an avid outdoorsman, McNaughton soon stepped into the ministry’s co-founder role.
Father in the Field’s Mission
The mission of Fathers in the Field is to “defend the cause of the fatherless (Isaiah 1:17) by rekindling and establishing the spirit of boys who have been abandoned by their fathers; mentoring them one-on-one in life skills through outdoor activities, and by sharing a Christian understanding of our Heavenly Father’s love and sacrifice for His children.”
“God makes it very clear in his Word that the fatherless and the widows are the most vulnerable in any society. And He commands His people, His Church, to defend the cause of the fatherless and widows over 110 times in His Word,” Smithbaker said. “The mission fields are in their own backyard; they’re the fields of the fatherless.”
This ministry, which equips and coaches churches to raise godly men to stand in the gap to help the fatherless, is centered on three important goals: faith, fatherhood, and forgiveness.
Faith – Demonstrates to boys how they have a Father in Heaven who created, loves, and cares for them, and will never forsake them. (Joshua 1:5)
Fatherhood – Demonstrates fatherly love and commitment, to repair broken spirits and prepare the foundation for future fatherhood. (Deuteronomy 6:6-9)
Forgiveness – Shares the need for boys to forgive the failings of their earthly fathers, as our Heavenly Father forgives His children in Christ. (Mark 11:25).
The Mentor Father
The ministry helps churches raise up church-approved men who become mentors (a mentor father) to fatherless boys between the ages of 7-17 (field buddies) within the church and community. These godly men submit to an application process which includes a background check. The pastor and
Will enjoys some target practice with his mentor father, Gary.
leadership team must approve the men before they become a mentor father to a field buddy.
Mentors receive a welcome package with a printed Journey Guide. It includes the Journey Life Curriculum that helps guide boys into authentic Christian manhood. It also includes a planning outline for the annual Celebration Event, and an area to record each month’s service project and journey gift. The mentor gives the Journey Guide to his field buddy before their first journey talk.
The mentor father commits to one year at a time, hoping to complete a 3-year ministry covering the curriculum intentionally dealing with the father wound. They meet with their field buddies four times a month, two of which include attending Sunday school and church together (about five-six hours a month). A Commitment Ceremony is held along with an endof-the-year celebration event.
The monthly journey talks allow mentor fathers to share and demonstrate the wisdom of the Heavenly Father while exploring God’s creation with their field buddies. The Journey Talks include a monthly hands-on activity to help prepare them for their year-end “Adventure Passage Event,” a multiday outdoor journey celebrating their time together and their “rite of passage toward authentic manhood.”
Field buddies also receive a gift when they complete their Journey Talk lesson. The journey gifts are designed to help equip field buddies for their end-of-the-year outdoor adventure. In addition to serving as incentives to complete their monthly lessons, they allow field buddies to participate in the Outdoor Celebration Event safely and without any financial burden to the family. The gifts also represent the good gifts our Heavenly Father provides to His children.
Through each encounter and activity, Smithbaker said the field buddies get to see a godly man make and fulfill a commitment, which is so crucial to the healing process.
“These boys have deep wounds and callouses around their hearts and they don’t even believe what a man says when he starts mentoring,” he explained. “They are used to men that don’t keep their commitments.”
The Great American Rescue Mission
Once the mentors are in place, the next step is to seek out fatherless boys within the community. There are 25 million fatherless children under the age of 18, with 50% of children in our country growing up in homes without their fathers. Many times, they are reached through connections with single moms, which Smithbaker describes as “widows of our time.” He explained that many fatherless boys and single women aren’t in church, so they have to go to them as a mission field.
“That’s why we call this the great American rescue mission. We plead with churches to be the cavalry to this largest unchurched people group in America. They’re not coming to church. We have to rescue them from behind enemy lines,” Smithbaker said.
In addition to field buddies being paired up with mentor fathers, female church champions are assigned to the single moms of the boys. They can serve as a main point of contact if
Making a commitment to each other.
there are other needs the church can help with. Mentor fathers communicate with the single mom via text and include their wives in the text as well.
Serving the Community Together
Community service is an important component of the Fathers in the Field ministry. One of the commitments the mentor father and field buddy make is to do a monthly service project together. These projects often involve serving widows in a variety of ways, including yard work, small household repairs, etc. Church elders and deacons get involved in identifying church members who are in need.
The Forgiveness Journey
Smithbaker explained that the path to forgiveness for their earthly father can take some time; the ultimate goal as the mentor father and field buddy go through the Journey Life Curriculum together.
Most of the fatherless boys say they can never forgive their father for leaving them. Once the trust has formed between the two, the mentor father discusses the importance of forgiving the boy’s father with him and introduces the love of the Heavenly Father who will never abandon him.
“They don’t really get to speak into these boys’ lives until the second year. It’s about speaking life and truth and translating the gospel into a fatherless boy’s language. This is about piercing his calloused heart with the truth of life so he can understand it,” Smithbaker said.
Transforming Lives Through the Freedom of Forgiveness
Throughout the years, Smithbaker has seen many fatherless boys transformed through the freedom of forgiveness. However, the one example that continues to bring tears to his eyes is Masen, the ministry’s first field buddy. This nine-year-
KINGDOM BATTLE?
www.fathersinthefield.com
old boy was in Smithbaker’s Sunday school class and was first introduced to the idea of forgiving his father six months into the ministry.
When his mentor (co-founder McNaughton) asked if he could forgive his dad for leaving him, he wrote in his journal: “I WILL NEVER, EVER FORGIVE HIM.” Sometime later in the second year of the ministry, he came into the Sunday school class and told Smithbaker that he had forgiven his father. And that wasn’t all. He also received Christ as his Savior.
When asked what he wanted to do, Masen said that he wanted to forgive his dad, who was in jail, in person. A meeting was arranged and he visited his dad and gave him his Bible. He was ecstatic when his dad said that he would look him up after he was released from prison. When that time came, he heard nothing. Although he never had the relationship with his earthly father he desired, he found healing through the love and forgiveness of his Heavenly Father and was baptized at the church. He even got to share the gospel with his grandparents.
Pam S. Walker is the former National Editor of Answers magazine, a publication of Answers in Genesis , and is a freelance writer living in the Cincinnati area where she writes for various Christian publications and serves as the President of the Boone County, Kentucky Word Weavers group.
DEFENDING THE CAUSE OF THE FATHERLESS
Fathers in the Field continues to grow since its inception in 2005 and has received broad exposure through national and local media. The ministry is currently in 38 states and nearly 500 churches. For those who want to bring the ministry to their home church, the first step is to bring it to the attention of the senior pastor and request a pastor’s packet from the website, www.fathersinthefield.com . The ministry’s website includes many resources that help churches promote and educate others on how to reach and serve fatherless boys.
For Smithbaker, one act of obedience to forgive his father on that dark, winding road has impacted thousands of lives throughout the history of the ministry. He has seen field buddies find healing, receive Christ, and even become missionaries – sometimes to those in foreign countries, but many times to those in their own backyard.
Seeking Dad
By Joyce Moore
His eyebrows slanted upward as if he were Vincent Price in a horror movie. “Ah-Ah-Ah.” The laugh sounded wicked. Mischief was on his face as he pulled back the dishtowel and spun it into a thin wet missile. Then came the inevitable. Snap. He did it with skill and it gave him great pleasure. The thrill was all his. For me, there was pain. A sharp stinging at the point of impact.
It was a game Daddy and I played in the kitchen on the rare occasions he helped with the dishes. Usually, it was me alone with the mess and sudsy water. Washing the dishes was girls’ work, of course, and I was the only girl. But if he decided to dry, he made a game of it. I loved hearing him laugh and I cherished any time he spent with me. I dreaded it, too. He always hurt me.
I had a reputation in my family for being a cry-baby. A weakling. Overlysensitive. So, I fought back tears when the pain came and tried harder to evade the cruel weapon. Daddy was like a big kid, unaware that a wet towel could put somebody’s eye out. He got such pleasure in the chase — and the assault.
pattern. Pinky to thumb. Pinky to thumb. Each finger tapping the beat to some tune in his head. And his leg would bounce. If you sat with him on a wooden bench, you bounced too.
The things that made him different from other dads were the secret things. The lying. The cheating. Promises broken. He lived a fantasy life in public. Nobody knew what he was like at home. The worst part? He was a pastor. A minister of the gospel.
I was a TV addict. My favorite shows were “Patty Duke,” “Father Knows Best” and “Gidget.” Ironically, each program featured a strong father-figure who would take his moody teenaged daughter onto his lap. He would listen to her problems. Then he would speak wise words of advice that not only soothed but solved problems. I longed for a Daddy like that.
“During the years between kindergarten and twelfth grade, I attended ten different schools in eight towns. We lived in thirteen different houses.”
His other favorite game didn’t give the victim a chance to move out of the line of fire. Birthday spankings. He loved bending us over his knee at celebration time. He felt entitled as a father to administer the appropriate number of swats on the derriere. The problem was, he didn’t know his own strength. I felt every strike, every year. And he bragged that he would maintain this custom until I was eighteen, just to prove he could. It was truly a spanking and it always hurt. I learned to hold back the tears until I was out of his line of sight. There were always tears.
I grew up with an unusual father, though I fooled myself into thinking he was the classic all-American patriarch. He stayed married to my mom for twenty-four years. He worked hard and provided for our family. He dressed well and was very handsome.
He had a large presence, breezing into a room with flourish. People always seemed impressed. He loved to slap the men on the back and he had a firm handshake. He was big on giving the ladies a hug. His six-foot-four-inch frame gave them little chance to object. I could tell most of them liked it.
He was impulsive and restless. We moved more often than a military family. During the years between kindergarten and twelfth grade, I attended ten different schools in eight towns. We lived in thirteen different houses.
He didn’t sit still. If he did settle into the living room of our home, he fell asleep. In situations when he was forced to remain quiet, his fingers drummed on the nearest surface. A rhythmic
“Get me some coffee, Joycee.” The term of endearment always melted me and I would rush to comply. Anything to please. Coffee, black with a teaspoon of sugar. I took pride in knowing his formula.
“Give me a kiss.” It was an order, not a request. I lived to make him happy. He and I didn’t really talk. He told me I was pretty when I dressed up for church on Sunday. He asked short questions and tossed out comments. Some are imprinted in my memory.
“Horse feathers and chicken hair!” he’d say if he doubted something was true.
“If it was a snake, it would have bit you,” when I couldn’t find something quickly enough.
“You don’t have the sense God give ants.” That one hurt. The improper use of grammar gave it an added bite.
“You’re like a bull in a China closet.” Again, painful. But I was expected to take it on the cuff and not be so sensitive.
I prayed for a father-daughter relationship that was deep and meaningful. Sometimes I pretended I had one. Patty Duke lovingly called her dad Pop-O. I tried giving my dad a nickname. He growled at me. He seemed to prefer formality. Distance. But I didn’t complain most of the time. My only sibling, a brother, had an even less desirable relationship with him. I was regarded, by some, as Daddy’s Little Girl. I longed for something more.
One day, alone in my bedroom, I cried out my disappointment to God in Heaven. Why can’t I have a dad who knows me and loves me? One who listens to me and talks tenderly to me. Can’t you change him into a better daddy?
An answer came. I wasn’t expecting to get an answer right away, but it came with the clarity of sunshine breaking through on a foggy day.
Annual Writing Contest “Trust and Obey”
It isn’t always easy to obey God, especially when we can’t see the purpose or outcome of what He’s telling us to do. In 1200-1500 words, tell us your story (or someone else’s) about trusting God and choosing obedience. Were you hesitant to obey at first? Why? What about God’s character allowed you to trust and obey Him? What did obeying God require of you? What was the outcome? How did choosing to obey impact your walk with God and/or your relationship with others?
Please include a short author’s biography and 2-3 personal photos (if relevant) that complement your story. You can find more details about contest submissions at todayschristianliving.org under our Writer’s Guidelines.
1st Prize:
$300 and we publish your article
2nd Prize:
$200 and we publish your article
3rd Prize:
$100 and we publish your article
Submissions must be received by August 15, 2025. Winners will be announced in the January 2026 issue. Email submissions to editor@todayschristianliving with Contest Submission in subject line. Or send by mail to: Today’s Christian Living, ATTN: Editor, P.O. Box 5000, Iola, WI 54945
All submissions must be previously unpublished and your own work. By entering, you are granting us permission to publish your story if you win. Winning submissions become the property of Today’s Christian Living and may be edited. Due to the volume of submissions we receive, only winners will be notified.
“You, Daughter, have the perfect Father. You are talking to Him right now.”
I knew, in that moment, the profound truth. When I was eight years old, I knelt down beside my parents’ bed. I was being invited into the presence of Almighty God, ironically, by my dad. I had come to realize I had a sin problem and needed to apologize. I talked to God that day, asking Him to forgive me and clean me up by the blood of His Son, Jesus. He instantly did that. He forgave me and transformed me into his child. He became my Father.
As a teen, looking out my bedroom window, I started to realize what a gift I had been given.
My Father, God, is faithful and true. He always keeps His promises. He is always there for me to talk to. “Come, let us reason together,” He tells me.
He lets me know when I mess up, then He surrounds me with His loving forgiveness. He assures me that I am fearfully
and wonderfully made so I don’t have to feel bad if I’m that clumsy bull in a China shop.
I can trust him to be the same yesterday, today and forever. He isn’t impulsive but steady and dependable.
He is always with me. I am never alone.
He has always had a plan for my life. I can look back and see how He’s guided me through thick and thin.
He protects me. He keeps me safe. He comforts me. “The Lord is like a Father to His children, tender and compassionate to those who fear Him.” (Psalm 103:13)
Even Patty Duke’s Pop-O can’t top that.
Joyce is the wife of James, mother of four children and Nana to four grandchildren. She is retired and enjoys time with her family (and two kitties), is an avid reader and loves to write stories. Many of her stories tell of her adventures and struggles with autism in her family.
Editor’s Pick for Kids
God’s Signpost
By Kristyn Getty (Author) & J.P. Lynch (Illustrator) [Crossway]
The whole universe is a symphony to God that echoes His glory and believers harmonize with songs of adoration. In the illustrated book Pippa and the Singing Tree, singer and hymn writer Kristyn Getty teaches children how they can answer Scripture’s call to worship.
Playing outside one chilly autumn day, Pippa is surrounded by nature. The great trees, robins, and icy winds, depicted in charming lyrical prose, declare God’s majesty. Moved by the beauty around her, Pippa lifts her voice, adding her own song to the chorus.
Combined with artwork by P. J. Lynch, this story is ideal for inspiring children to worship the Lord. In a special note at the end of the book, Getty shares some of her favorite psalms.
“Where does Grandma fit in the balance of power?”
‘Our sales have tripled since I added a shot of espresso!”
Grandkids Sleepover
On a Friday night we had what my granddaughter called a “sleepover.”
The following morning my daughter picked up her three-year-old.
While packing up her things Kendall asked, “Addison, did you have a fun time with nannie and g-pappy?”
The little girl looked over to us and smiled, “Yes, I had fun.…I want to keep them both.”
Submitted by Denise M. Greene
Alittle boy took his dog on a “take your pet to school” day. There were prizes for the smallest, the prettiest, the cutest, and the smartest pet.
Determined that his dog win a prize, the boy put his pet through a whole series of tricks. Finally the boy turned to the dog and asked, “Mindy, how much is two plus two minus four?”
The dog sat quietly, making no sound, remaining still and silent.
“Right!” exclaimed the boy. His dog won first prize.”
From Mikey’s Funnies www.mikeysfunnies.com
If you have a joke or funny story you’d like to share, email editor@ todayschristianliving.org. If we print your joke, we’ll pay you $25.
Blythe Daniel with her father, James McIntosh. (Photos courtesy of Blythe Daniel.)
When Dads Stand Tall
By Blythe Daniel
A
Devoted Father
When I was growing up, my dad seemed taller than most. I think it was his height but also his stature.
When we’d go places, people would speak to my dad. They would call my dad by his first and last name. I thought that was unusual sometimes, but I see now that he was known. Not just part of him, but he was fully known and recognized by others and by God.
He had (and still does) a warm personality. I believe people noticed the way he spoke to them and made them feel. There is something about having a calming, gentle presence with leadership tucked underneath.
My dad is a loving man. Some might say, “He hasn’t experienced the deep loss in his life that most men do. Loving others and being kind must just come naturally to him.”
At the age of 30, my dad lost his dad due to a heart attack. Several years prior, my dad lost his brother to a heart issue that was incurable. I think my dad had his heart tested as he watched his mom and older brother navigate life in the years after.
When dad’s lessons from his father stopped short, his fatherin-law gave my dad many tools and tips and loved him as his own son. Dad also gleaned from his Heavenly Father. Dad has been a student of the Word and a worshipper as far back as I can remember.
Do you remember your dad going beyond talking about things to doing what he said? My dad didn’t just talk about Christian music, he took us there.
Dad drove us to Christian music concerts and rocked alongside my mom, my brother and me. I think his passion for music has carried over to our entire family to this day. The emphasis he put on edifying our souls became as important to us as it was to him.
In one particular music event at Six Flags Over Georgia, “Atlanta Fest” became “Mud Fest” as we wore ponchos, mudtainted shoes and soaked in the tunes that we loved from our favorite Christian music artists. We were wearing more than gear that weekend. We wore smiles, love, and joy and our dad made sure we got the full experience.
Billy Graham said, “A good father is one of the most unsung, unpraised, unnoticed and yet one of the most valuable assets in our society.”
When you consider your dad, are you able to say that he has been a good father to you? Or have you wondered if your dad noticed you because he was more focused on other events or people?
When we were growing up, my dad would sit down with us when we were working on a math problem. I remember wondering why he wouldn’t just give me the answer but he wanted me to work through the problem to discover the answer. He majored in finance, so it was no surprise he knew what he was doing.
He made time for me when I didn’t know how to figure something out. It went beyond math problems to problems with apartments, cars, an unbalanced bank account and other decisions that are typically called “life.”
My dad lost his job when I was in junior high. I remember feeling safe, knowing that God would provide for us. My parents let us know things could be a little tight for a while. But I don’t remember any lack. We always had what we needed. I believe God used my dad to show me that we could trust him for our needs. I remember my dad taking a job he didn’t love doing to provide for us. He saw himself as our provider and made sure we didn’t go without.
To this day, my dad does this for my mom, his children and grandchildren. He is a generous giver even if it costs him.
How does a dad become generous if he hasn’t had a lot to give? How does a dad provide love for his family if he hasn’t received a lot of love in his life?
Watching my husband be an attentive dad, when he didn’t get as much affirmation as he wanted from his dad, shows me the love of the man I stood beside growing up. My dad’s love is reflected in our home as we raise our children. My husband has that same stature we need and want to see in dads.
The Marks of a Devoted Father
How do you recognize your dad? Perhaps there is a time you remember looking up to your dad. Perhaps you’re now looking over him as you help care for him at an older age.
There’s a quote by an unknown source that says: “A father is someone you look up to no matter how tall you grow.”
I wonder if the person who shared this realized that his perspective changed as he was growing older. He still looked up to his father even though he may have been even taller or perhaps was looking down at him sitting in a chair, helping him.
Over the years, I’ve realized my dad knew a lot back then and he still knows a lot now — more than me. Even though I have grown up, my love for my dad and my need for him is something I will never outgrow.
God gives us our dads and though they are not perfect, God uses them in our lives to teach us. God is the ultimate Father who will always stand above all that we see in this life. Let us remember that our role as children and parents is to stand tall no matter what we may walk through. Looking up to you, Dad, today and always.
Blythe Daniel is the coauthor of Mended and I Love You, Mom!, which she wrote with her mother, Dr. Helen McIntosh. Blythe, her son, William Daniel, and her mother co-authored I Love You, Dad! Words to Honor and Humor You. Most recently, Blythe and her daughter, Calyn Daniel, co-authored Let’s Be Friends: A Tween Devotional on Finding and Keeping Strong Friendships. Blythe worked for Harper Collins Christian Publishing in marketing and publicity and now enjoys her work as a literary agent. She lives in Colorado with her husband and three teenagers.
I LOVE YOU, DAD!
Filled with humorous stories, fond memories, and biblical references, this tribute to fathers and father figures ultimately points readers to their Heavenly Father. It honors the attributes we cherish most in those who play a father’s role in our lives; their hard work, their compassion, their sense of humor, or their devotion to their family. Even in their imperfection, we can often find glimpses of our Abba Father. Available on Amazon.
Beth Blamick has three adult children and six grandchildren.
She’s a former elementary teacher and a member of Word Weavers International.
Beth enjoys serving in women’s ministry at her church, singing in the Florida Worship Choir, and hosting family game night. She’s been married to her husband, Eric, for 31 years. Beth shares spiritual encouragement at www. bethblamickwrites.com
If you have a turning point in your life you would like to share, email your story to editor@ todayschristianliving.org All submissions must be under 800 words. If we print your story, we will pay you $75. We reserve the right to edit for length and content. All submissions become the property of Today’s Christian Living.
By Beth Blamick
The Case of the Fried Chicken A Lesson in Selflessness
Ithink of myself as a pretty unselfish person. I try to put others first and to be generous with what I have. As a matter of fact, it bothers me when others display selfishness or its close cousin, self-centeredness. That makes this story quite ironic.
One day my teenage daughter and I were at the grocery store shopping for ourselves and for my elderly mother. She was bedridden and could no longer shop for herself, so I had begun to do her shopping each week.
On this day, I was craving fried chicken. I mean, craving it. I never cook fried chicken myself because of the mess it creates but occasionally — having grown up on my mom’s delicious southern-fried variety — I have a hankering for some. Today was that day. As we meandered through the deli at our favorite grocery store, I grabbed a box full of assorted, hot, crispy pieces of fried chicken and added it to our cart.
My mouth watered in anticipation as the smell of that savory delicious fried chicken wafted through the car on the way to my mom’s house. I couldn’t wait to bite into its crunchy, greasy goodness. I knew I wouldn’t even take the time to cook vegetables to go with it. Who needs vegetables when you have fried chicken?
My daughter and I walked into my 90-year-old mother’s house; arms laden with grocery bags — having fulfilled the list she gave us. We set the bags down on the kitchen counter, said hello to her caregiver, and proceeded into her bedroom. After giving her a big hug, I said to her, “Mom, we got your groceries.” (Actually, it was more like, “MOM, WE GOT YOUR GROCERIES!” since my mom was nearly deaf at this point.) To my surprise (and horror), mom immediately replied, “Boy, I sure wish I had told you to get fried chicken. I would really love some tonight.”
My daughter looked right at me and I at her. Was she going to rat me out? We both knew that box of warm fried chicken was out in the car. I briefly thought about doing the right thing — but with the smell of that fried chicken still fresh in my nostrils, I couldn’t give it up. I averted my eyes from my daughter’s accusatory look. Admittedly, it was not my best day as a human.
I said, “Oh, mom, I’m so sorry. We’ll get you some next time.” I could feel the icy stare of my sweet daughter boring into my conscience from across the bed where she was standing. Quickly, we both gave mom a big hug and I said, “We’ll see you in a couple days, mom, love you.”
As we slipped back into the car my daughter looked at me, “Mom, I can’t believe you wouldn’t give that fried chicken to Mimi.” “Well,” I said, “we’ll get her some next time.” to which she replied, “What if there isn’t a next time?”
That broke me. I told my daughter to dig the fried chicken out of the bag and run it back inside. A giant smile spread across her face. Before long she came back out and exclaimed, “Mimi was so happy! She wondered where in the world it came from.” We laughed and said we should have told her it was a miracle from God like the loaves and the fishes.
I turned on the car and headed out of my mom’s driveway. When I passed the turnoff to our house a few minutes later, my daughter asked where we were going. “Well,” I said, “I thought since you were so generous with my fried chicken, you wouldn’t mind running into the store and grabbing me another box.”
It can be hard to put our own desires aside and to think of others first, but that’s what the Christian life is all about. Generosity is pleasing to God. It is love in action. Jesus lived a selfless life and taught His followers to do the same — to serve others with humility and grace.
I sure enjoyed my chicken that night, but I know my sweet mama enjoyed hers even more. She passed away in 2021 and is in heaven now, enjoying blessings that far surpass even a plate of warm fried chicken. I learned a lesson from my daughter that day about selflessness and doing the right thing.
“The point is this: The person who sows sparingly, will also reap sparingly, and the person who sows generously will also reap generously. Each person should do as he decided in his heart — not reluctantly or out of compulsion, since God loves a cheerful giver.”
2 Corinthians 9:6-7 (CSB)
Walt Larimore, MD, has been called one of America’s best-known family physicians and has been named in the “Guide to America’s Top Family Doctors,”
“The Best Doctors in America,” “Who’s Who in Medicine and Healthcare,” and “Who’s Who in America.”
He’s a former vice president and physician in residence at Focus on the Family, and the American Life League named him a “Rock-Solid Pro-Life” awardee. He’s also an award-winning medical journalist and the bestselling author of over 40 books. He and his wife of 52 years, Barb, have two adult children and reside in Colorado Springs. You can find his daily blog at www.DrWalt.com and follow him on Facebook at “DrWalt.com.” Have questions for Dr. Walt? Email them to editor@ todayschristianliving.org
This column is for informational purposes only, does not constitute health or medical advice, and is not intended to substitute for the diagnosis or recommendation(s) of your healthcare professional(s).
Get Outdoors!
QUESTION: Both my husband and I walk for exercise. However, I prefer walking outdoors whenever possible,
and he prefers the treadmill. Do you have any tips that might convince him to come with me?
ANSWER: Of course, you could try nagging or blackmail, but I think there’s a better strategy and that is showing him the physical, emotional, relational and spiritual benefits of getting outdoors more often.
This topic is so important, that Dr. Phil Bishop and I devoted a whole chapter to “Get Outdoors!” in our book, Fit Over 50: Make Simple Choices for a Healthier, Happier You (https://amzn.to/3BhYO2r). Here’s an excerpt of what we wrote:
If you grew up anywhere other than a large city, you likely spent a lot of your early years roaming through neighborhoods, parks, forests, and mountains. We and our siblings grew up in the outdoors, which may explain our love for it. But it turns out, being outdoors is also highly healthy.
By
Japanese researchers are describing what they call shinrin-yoku, which means “relaxing in a forest atmosphere” or “forest bathing,” which they define as “the practice of spending time in a forested area in an effort to reap wellness rewards.” They are really onto something, as the research behind this is really cool.
Benefits of Being Outdoors
One study found that participants who walked in a forest had lower blood pressure, reduced pulse, and 15% lower stress hormone concentrations than those who strolled through an urban environment. Other studies have shown that walking in the woods can improve blood pressure, boost mental health and decrease cancer risk. Just walking outdoors, not necessarily in a forest, has been shown to improve cardiovascular health, reduce stress and depression, enhance mood, improve sleep, enhance cognitive function, increase creativity and problem-solving skills, and increase vitamin D levels.
Being outside is highly healthy, even if you’re not walking. Another study reported that “participants who sat in an urban park for just five
Walt Larimore, MD
(Photo credit: Michelle Adserias )
minutes showed significant increases in positive emotions compared to participants who sat in a windowless laboratory room.” One of the study coauthors said , “When you need an emotional boost, the fastest and easiest way is to spend a few minutes with nature. Being outside is the best, but even contemplating a picture of a natural scene will make a difference.”
Other scientists have found that being in nature or going on nature walks has memory-, vision-, and focus-promoting effects while reducing stress, inflammation, fatigue, depression, and anxiety. Nature walks have memory-promoting effects and boost levels of happiness. Being in nature reduces stress, fatigue, and anxiousness. Another study suggested that as far as improving energy, spending 20 minutes outside was equivalent to one cup of coffee. A research review reported studies pointing out that natural sunlight helps mitigate pain, and that being outdoors may boost your immune system, may enhance creativity, and “helps us shrug off societal pressures, allowing us to remember and value more important things like relationships, sharing, and community” while “providing free aromatherapy.”
Research from the Journal of the American Heart Association suggested individuals “who live in neighborhoods with more green spaces may have less stress, healthier blood vessels, and a lower risk of heart attacks and strokes than residents of communities without many outdoor recreation areas.” The investigators found that “compared to people in areas with the least amount of green space, residents of the greenest neighborhoods had lower urinary levels of the hormone epinephrine, indicating lower stress levels.” Even in city environments, clean, green public spaces make people happier. Researchers “ found reductions in feelings of worthlessness, hopelessness and overall poor mental health” when people spent time in vacant lots that had either been “cleaned up” or “greened up.”
Despite the benefits of being outdoors, a national survey reported, “Americans spend 87% of their time indoors and an additional 6% in an enclosed vehicle (on average).” In other words, only 7% of their day was outside. Yet, a review of ten studies found “getting outside — and moving — for as little as five minutes at a time improved both mood and selfesteem. Exercise near a body of water had the biggest effect.” A Stanford study found that “creative thinking improves while a person is walking and shortly thereafter.” Maybe this is why Aristotle created the peripatetic school, where students could walk with teachers as they discussed matters.
Doctors in Shetland, Scotland , have been authorized to prescribe nature to their patients. It’s thought to be the first program of its kind and seeks to reduce blood pressure and anxiety and increase happiness for those with diabetes, a mental illness, stress, heart disease, and more. The Scottish also believe spending time in nature reduces aggression, attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder symptoms, improves pain control, and strengthens the immune system.
God Revealed in Nature
For followers of Jesus, these data should be no surprise. Dr. J. Nick Pitts has wisely pointed out , “As those who have eyes to see, nature reminds us that we have a purpose in this life, a Provider during this life, and a Sustainer throughout this life ( Psalm 8:1-9; Matthew 6:25-34; Colossians 1:15-17). Nature makes us happier because the very rocks will cry out about the one who died to make us more than happy ( Luke 19:40).” He added , “Jesus often used the world as His classroom, taking objects and events and turning them into object lessons. From fig trees to flowers in the field, His renewed mind found the fingerprints of His Father everywhere ( Mark 11:12-25).”
As Paul observed , “Open your eyes and there it is! By taking a long and thoughtful look at what God has created, people have always been able to see what their eyes, as such, can’t see: eternal power, for instance, and the mystery of his divine being” ( Romans 1:20 MSG). Romans 1:20 tells us , “Through everything God made, they can clearly see his invisible qualities—his eternal power and divine nature.” God’s divine design in the natural world He created for us is, along with Scripture, a tutor, teaching us about the God who created us.
Barb and I like to walk outdoors whenever we can. But you may be different. You may prefer the treadmill, stationary cycle, or rowing machines. Your schedule or living situation may require indoor exercise. But we encourage you to get outside whenever you can. What we like about getting outdoors is the variety. Every day is different. Being outside affords us the opportunity to see beautiful trees, flowers, birds, animals, and sunsets. But the best thing to experience when we are physically active outdoors is God Himself. Take an opportunity to get outside. Look around. See what God has done!
LEARN MORE
Take some time to meditate on these verses about God, our great Creator.
• Job 12:7-10
• Isaiah 42:5
• Isaiah 55:12
• Jeremiah 32:17
• Nehemiah 9:6
• Psalms 8:3-4
• Psalms 19:1
• Psalms 96:11-12
• Psalms 104:24-25
• Hebrews 11:3
• Revelation 4:11
and Grads Moms, Dads
In the Old Testament, the places where important spiritual events and godly encounters took place were marked by pillars of stones — a remembrance and reminder of the great things God had done.
After meeting with God on Mt. Sinai and receiving the Ten Commandments, Moses built an altar and twelve stone pillars (representing the 12 tribes of Israel) at the foot of the mountain. After his angelic dream, when God promised to return him to the promised land, Jacob set up a stone as a pillar and named the place Bethel — House of God. And Joshua, following God’s instructions, had the Israelites build a pillar with 12 stones, one from each tribe, on the edge of the
NIV Application Bible
GIFT GUIDE
Jordan River after God stopped the water’s flow so the entire nation of Israel could cross it.
We don’t build pillars as reminders of important events anymore. But we mark them with gatherings, capture them in photos, and (if you’re sentimental like me) hold onto the cards with well-wishes from family and friends.
As we move into the season of milestone celebrations — parenthood, graduation, marriage — you may want to tap into some of these resources.
“Bless the Lord, O my soul, and forget not all His benefits.”
— Psalm 103:2
[Zondervan]
Featuring thousands of study notes drawn from the bestselling NIV Application Commentary series, the NIV Application Bible helps you understand Scripture and apply it to your life in a new way. It pairs a deeper understanding of the ancient biblical text with contemporary application of the lessons found within it. You can find it at nivapplicationbible.com
[Zondervan]
Perfect for high school or college students with rich content from award-winning authors Philip Yancey and Tim Stafford! Three-track reading system helps overcome common barriers to Bible study to make it a daily habit. Features are especially designed to help students understand the Bible and live out its life-changing truths! You can find it at https://bibl.es/3Y1uB3U
NIV, Student Bible
[Zondervan]
With its decades-long legacy of helping readers grasp the Bible’s meaning, the NIV Study Bible is designed specifically to help readers know what the Bible says and understand why the Bible matters. You can find it at https://bibl.es/3DCW8lC
NIV Foundation Study Bible
[Zondervan]
The NIV Foundation Study Bible features an approachable and easy-to-use layout, with straightforward and broad study notes that help you discover the beauty and truth of God’s Word. Concise study notes provide helpful comments on passages of Scripture, while theological notes draw attention to important doctrinal content in the Bible. You can find it at https://bibl.es/3FEPbkw
The Jesus Bible, NIV & ESV
By Passion Publishing [Zondervan]
Encounter the living Jesus in all of Scripture. From the Passion movement, The Jesus Bible lifts Jesus up as the lead story of the Bible and encourages you to faithfully follow H im as you participate in H is story. Profound yet accessible study features help you meet Jesus throughout Scripture. You can find it at thejesusbible.com
NIV Basic Study Bible
[Zondervan]
With straightforward study notes, this study Bible will help you discover the beauty and truth of God’s Word. Concise study notes provide helpful comments on passages of Scripture, while theological notes draw attention to important doctrinal content in the Bible. Translators’ footnotes offer clarification and information about the original-language texts. You can find it at https://bibl.es/4ih3Sst
[Zondervan]
You yes, you can read through the whole Bible in a year! The NIV Daily Scripture will help you on your journey to read through the Bible in one year. From day one, each reading includes a portion from the Old Testament, the New Testament, and a Psalm or Proverb. You can find it at https://bibl.es/43UMKEk
[Zondervan]
Featuring 600 illustrated verses, the NIV Beautiful Word Bible, Updated Edition offers a unique visual treatment of Scripture for a more beautiful quiet time. The full-color artwork brings God’s message to life, while the wide margins allow you room to express your feelings, fears, and prayers through words or pictures. You can find it at beautifulwordbible.com
[Zondervan]
You yes, you can read through the whole Bible in a year! The NASB Daily Scripture will help you on your journey to read through the Bible in one year. From day one, each reading includes a portion from the Old Testament, the New Testament, and a Psalm or Proverb. You can find it at https://bibl.es/43UMKEk
NIV Artisan Bible, Large Print
[Zondervan]
Exquisite from the inside out, the NIV Artisan Collection Bible, Large Print invites you to journal or draw alongside Scripture. The larger print size is easy to read as you study and make your notes in the wide margins. You can find it at artisanbibles.com
NIV Beautiful Word Bible
NIV Quest Study Bible
Life Principles for the Graduate: Nine Truths for Living God’s Way
[Zondervan]
One of the best ways to learn is to ask questions as you study. The NIV Quest Study Bible features over 7,000 notes written in an engaging question and answer format that give insight into the common, uncommon, and sometimes perplexing passages from the Bible. You can find it at nivqueststudybible.com
Declutter Your Heart and Your Home
By Julia Ubbenga [Zondervan Books]
Live an abundant life without an abundance of stuff. Declutter Your Heart and Your Home shows you how to live simply and fully. Julia Ubbenga shares tips to clear clutter and embrace Scripture’s truths. Start your journey today and experience God’s peace in your heart and home. You can find it at https://bit.ly/4iAg4Ew
By Dr. Charles Stanley [Thomas Nelson]
Trusted pastor and bestselling author Dr. Charles F. Stanley offers a guiding light amid the uncertain and exciting time that is graduation. This insightful book provides nine biblical truths designed to help graduates not just survive but thrive in a world filled with distractions and doubts. Available at Amazon.com
People Pleaser: Breaking Free from the Burden of Imaginary Expectations
By Jinger Duggar Vuolo [W Publishing]
Struggling with people-pleasing? People Pleaser by Jinger Duggar Vuolo blends faith and self-discovery to help you uncover your true identity in God. Featuring reflection questions, Bible verses, and prayers, this powerful guide offers tools for finding freedom and living authentically. You can find it at https://wpublishinggroup.co/PeoplePleaser
Power Moves: Ignite Your Confidence and Become a Force
By Sarah Jakes Roberts [W Publishing Group]
Discover your true power with Sarah Jakes Roberts’ Power Moves, a guide to living boldly in Christ. This inspiring book provides practical wisdom to help you fulfill your purpose and face challenges with faith and determination. You can find it at https://wpublishinggroup.co/powermoves
Woman Evolve: Break Up with Your Fears and Revolutionize Your Life
By Sarah Jakes Roberts [W Publishing Group]
Discover how past mistakes and struggles can lead to personal growth in Woman Evolve. Sarah Jakes Roberts uses Eve’s story to inspire women to evolve, heal, and fulfill their God-given purpose. You can find it at https://wpublishinggroup.co/womanevolve
Grace for the Moment for Moms: Inspirational Thoughts of Encouragement and Appreciation for Moms
By Max Lucado [Thomas Nelson]
Mothers, for so many, are a welcoming hug, a helping hand, a comforting ear, a wise source of guidance. They do so much for so many, and in the devotional Grace for the Moment for Moms, bestselling author Max Lucado offers moms comfort, encouragement, and some much-needed moments of grace. Available at Amazon com
A New Way to Love Your Neighbor
By Jada Edwards [B&H Publishing]
Jada Edwards schools us all on how to transform our relationships by releasing the four limits holding back our experience of God’s love and adopting five clear ways to be loving to those around us (namely, to be curious, free, brave, resilient, and real). You can find it at jadaedwards.org
Prophet, Priest, and King
By R. Albert Mohler Jr. [B&H Publishing]
In this book, theologian R. Albert Mohler Jr. delves into the historical significance of the offices of prophet, priest, and king. Mohler presents a compelling argument: the three offices of Jesus should not be compartmentalized. They are interconnected and essential for Christian faithfulness in the home, the church, and society. You can find it at prophetpriestandkingbook.com
By Bethany Broderick [B&H Publishing]
What do you do when “believe in yourself” feels empty? This book by Bethany Broderick leads you to trade the striving and hustling that culture says leads to success for the truth that Christ has perfected you for all time. You can find it at perfectedbook.com
In His Footsteps
By Gayle Rogers Foster [B&H Publishing]
Spend daily moments with Jesus as Gayle Rogers Foster — daughter of the late and famous preacher Adrian Rogers — guides you through this 90-day devotional. Each day’s entry starts with a Scripture passage to ponder, includes a moving reflection from Gayle, and offers a final and insightful quote from the famous Adrian Rogers. You can find it at inhisfootstepsdevo.com
The Maker of the Mountain
By Sandra McCracken and Tim Nicholson [B&H Publishing]
Join Little Bear on a journey to find the Maker of the mountain and discover what our good God is like. Perfect for story time or bedtime, The Maker of the Mountain will leave children feeling loved by their strong, compassionate God and comforted to know Him better. You can find it at themakerofthemountain.com
Praying Through Your Pregnancy, Repackaged Edition
By Jennifer Polimino and Carolyn Warren [Revell, a Division of Baker Publishing Group]
Each chapter in this week-by-week guide reveals what is happening with your baby’s development that week, and includes journaling space to help you remember these precious moments as well as Scripture verses to guide your prayers. You’ll discover how to reduce stress and anxiety by placing your confidence in God! You can find it at https://bit.ly/PrayingPregnancy
Praying for Teen Girls
By Stacey Thacker
[Bethany
House,
a
division of Baker Publishing Group]
Helping you navigate the complicated teen years — and your changing relationship — with your daughter, Stacey Thacker shows you how to pray for seven key areas in your young woman’s life, find the wisdom you need each day, and rediscover the joy of being her mom. You can find it at https://bit.ly/Pray4TeenGirls
Kingdom Wisdom Devotional for Graduates
By Tony Evans
[Bethany House Publishers, a Division of Baker Publishing Group]
Young men aren’t just graduating from something, they’re graduating into something: becoming a powerful man of God. Dr. Tony Evans covers leadership, relationships, decision-making, success, and more in this 90-day devotional. You can find it at https://bit.ly/KingdomDevo
Praying for Teen Boys
By Brooke McGlothlin
[Bethany
House, a division of Baker Publishing Group]
Helping you navigate the complicated teen years, Brooke McGlothlin offers 90 Scripture-inspired prayers to help you fight for your teen, not against him. Feel purposeful, not powerless, in your parenting as you partner with God in prayer. You can find it at https://bit.ly/Pray4TeenBoys
101 Ways to Be Less Stressed
By Dr. Caroline Leaf
[Baker Books, a Division of Baker Publishing Group]
In this practical book, bestselling author and neuroscientist Dr. Caroline Leaf reveals 101 simple and scientific ways to reduce stress in order to boost your mind, mood, and mental health. With these straightforward strategies for mental self-care, you can change the way you think — and change your life. You can find it at https://bit.ly/101LessStressed
Restored
By Meshali Mitchell
[Revell, a Division of Baker Publishing Group]
Meshali Mitchell shares the story of how the Lord drew her out from behind the camera to embark on an unlikely home renovation during her own journey to healing. Steeped in Scripture, she shows you how to apply the lessons of patience and perseverance to your own life. You can find it at https://bit.ly/MitchellRestored
By David Lindell and Brandon Lindell [Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group]
Men were meant to live fulfilling lives driven by purpose and passion. We were meant to be lionhearted. It’s time to stop living defeated, discouraged, dejected, and disheartened and harness the power you already have to live focused, fulfilled, and fearless. This action-oriented guide will get you there. You can find it at https://bit.ly/LindellLionhearted
God is My Hiding Place
By Corrie ten Boom [Chosen Books]
Admirers of Corrie ten Boom, as well as a new generation will love this 40-day devotional that will help readers strengthen their faith and experience God’s peace. Whatever season of life, God is My Hiding Place will remind readers that God is their strength and refuge. You can find it at https://bit.ly/GodsHidingPlace
Fiercely Loved
By Lisa Bevere [Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group]
These 90 devotions by New York Times bestselling author Lisa Bevere help you discover the beautiful truth of how God thinks about you. God doesn’t just tolerate you; He loves you and wants you to know H is wild thoughts toward you are full of love, joy, grace, and mercy. You can find it at https://bit.ly/FiercelyLoved
The Leader’s Devotional
By David Green with Bill High [Baker Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group]
In this 90-day devotional, the founder of Hobby Lobby encourages business leaders to delve into the counterintuitive wisdom of the Bible so they can live and lead in a way that honors God. You can find it at https://bit.ly/LeadersDevo
A Jesus-Shaped Life
By Lisa Harper [Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group]
Theology doesn’t have to be stuffy or intimidating! Bestselling author and Bible teacher Lisa Harper makes academic-sounding concepts engaging, practical, and applicable by explaining how the realities behind them can actually transform the way we live with God and with other people. Discover practical theology for a more Jesusshaped life! You can find it at https://bit.ly/HarperJSL
The Kitchen Devotional
By Baker Publishing Group [Revell]
Experience a daily serving of joy, inspiration, and encouragement! This unique 90-day devotional includes more than 50 recipes and celebrates the rich blessings of good food, good company, and our great God. You can find it at bit.ly/KitchenDevo
Sundays at the Track
By Lee Weeks
[Revell, a Division of Baker Publishing Group]
Drawing from true stories and testimonials from many of your favorite NASCAR personalities, Sundays at the Track shares hard-won lessons on faith, winning graciously, and sacrifice. Perfect for any stock car racing enthusiast! You can find it at https://bit.ly/SundaysTrack
Land of Dreams
By Lauraine Snelling [Bethany House]
Gift a story of faith for Mother’s Day for fans of When Calls the Heart and Little House on the Prairie. From Norway to America, two women must strive for resilience amid unpromising new beginnings. Find Land of Dreams by Lauraine Snelling wherever books are sold and at BakerBookHouse.com
Every Man’s Bible
[Tyndale House Publishers]
Every Man’s Bible has thousands of study notes on topics important to men, straight talk for men about the challenges of life, trusted advice, and rich resources to prepare men to live with honor and integrity and to find victory in every battle they face. You can find it at EveryMansBible.com
Silent Horizons
By Chad Robichaux [Tyndale House Publishers]
In a military thriller perfect for Father’s Day, lone operator Foster Quinn struggles to balance his roles as a family man and an elite warrior when undercover behind enemy lines. From military veterans Chad Robichaux and Jack Stewart comes a pulse-pounding glimpse into the clandestine side of special operations. You can find it at tyndale.com/p/silent-horizons/9781496488701
Every Woman’s Bible
[Tyndale House Publishers]
Every Woman’s Bible is a study Bible for the heart and mind with 100+ scholars, writers, and contributors —all women—from around the world. It is packed with study notes and devotionals that address topics relevant to women with cultural, historical, and literary clarity and context to gain greater understanding. You can find it at EveryWomansBible.com
DaySpring Daily Devotional Bible for Moms
[Tyndale House Publishers]
The DaySpring Daily Devotional Bible for Moms was created for moms just like you—real moms with real-life joys and challenges. Be encouraged with daily reminders that God loves you, sees you, and is with you—always! Deepen your awareness of God’s presence with short daily devotionals and prayer prompts. You can find it at BibleforMoms.com
[Tyndale House Publishers]
Living a life of extraordinary purpose begins with extraordinary prayer. Add depth and intentionality to your time of prayer and Bible study with the Every Woman’s Prayer Journal . Experience the joy and power of praying Scripture with 100 journaling sessions of praise, confession, thanksgiving, and requests. You can find it at EveryWomansBible.com
So God Made a Grandma
By Leslie Means [Tyndale House Publishers]
He needed someone with a heart big enough to hold a million moments of joy and sorrow through the years… so God made a grandma.
So God Made a Grandma is a collection of true stories celebrating grandmas and their enduring legacy of faith, love, and family. You can find it at http://tyndale.life/ SoGodMadeaGrandmaTCL
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When My Dad Ran Away
By Amanda Harding
When my father ran away, my identity went with him. He had gotten into a fight with my Pap at the office, stormed out, unscrewed the electronic keypad for the garage door, taken the dog and disappeared. Nobody had heard from him in three days.
Lovely. I assured myself he would be back. He cared too much about the business. About the lawn being mowed. About the cleaning lady being paid. About me. It wasn’t in his nature. Except — the unscrewing of the garage keypad was dramatic even for him.
His phone rang and went to voicemail. What had I done to be ignored? Eventually, it went straight to voicemail, signaling he had either turned it off or the battery had died. It felt so
deeply personal. I tried to draw a line of rationality. In essence, I was trying to draw a hard truth that he did not intend to harm me by doing this. I called every hour. The days passed. Just how mad was he? Would he hurt himself? Was something seriously wrong? I called the police, the neighbors.
On day five, I called my Pap and asked a question I had been holding onto for a very long time. “What is the root of all this anger? People don’t just run away. What is it?”
“You know your daddy ran away once before, right? Before you were born.”
“No.” What had I missed? I started running the receipts.
“Your daddy got himself in big trouble — with the law.” What? When? There were no gaps. I knew his whole life story. I had no recollection of any sort of absence. In fact, he
Amanda being baptized.
(Photo provided by Amanda Harding.)
had never missed a single sporting event — or any event, for that matter — in my entire life.
“When your mom was pregnant with you, he went to jail for a year. The night before he was supposed to go away, nobody could find him.”
After my mom passed away, our house was like a giant time capsule, a treasure chest. Every so often I would come across something of hers that I hadn’t seen before, whether it was a grocery list in her handwriting, shoved in the back of a drawer, or a strand of hair on her bathrobe in the back of her closet.
were sitting in their living room with their Bibles out, looking concerned. Through tears. I told them I had learned something about my dad’s past that was very, very bad. I was afraid they’d see me as bad, too.
“How could he do this? I hate him. I don’t understand. It doesn’t make any sense,” I said. And finally, “What do I say to him for all this pain he has caused us?”
“You love him,” my father-in-law replied.
“I what?”
“You love him.”
A year and a half passed. My dad knew that I knew about his past. We never talked about it, just like we never talked about Mom or why he ran away in the first place.
Then, one day, I told my therapist this story. I waited for his eye to twitch.
He smiled and replied, “So, you feel like a giant question mark.” He had just given language to my emotional experience. Worth every penny. “Have you been baptized?”
I wanted to know more about her and, if I was being honest, I wanted to know more about myself. I wanted to know the ways in which I was like her. I wanted to know my birth story. The closest I had ever come was a stack of pictures of her pregnant belly tucked in photo albums she was working on before she died.
I found their wedding album. They were married in December. I was born in May. I did the math and it didn’t add up to perfection. Until that moment, I thought my family was perfect, the only blemish being Mom’s cancer. There was more?
“How did nobody ever tell me?”
“Your mom didn’t want you to know.”
I had written a memoir. Everyone in my family had read it and still, I did not know. My aunts. The nosey ones. My nan. They’d never slipped up — a real family secret.
I went back through every event on my lifeline, looking at it through this new lens. My mom gave birth alone. She married a man who was going to jail. Was she angry? Did she know he was going to jail when they got pregnant? It was all so scandalous! Who else knew? Did this make him a bad person? Did this make me a bad person by association? My greatest fear had always been that if people really knew me, they wouldn’t like me.
My dad, the one person in the world whom I trusted unquestionably, who raised me, whom I had enmeshed my whole belief system with as a means of survival, how could he? What a fraud! What else didn’t I know? The invisible thread that held us together through grief, when our world was knocked off its axis at my mom’s death, snapped with this discovery.
Prison. My mom. Me.
My Dad Comes Home
When I got the call that my dad had shown up at work, I drove to the first people who came to mind; my in-laws. It was a bit embarrassing telling them that my sixty-year-old father had gone “missing.” But it was the truth. When I arrived, they
“I’ve seen a picture of me baptized as a baby,” I replied, hoping that counted for something, that I wasn’t even more broken than I already felt.
On June 10, 2018, I placed my faith and identity in the only framework and foundation capable of holding my story. I was baptized in the name of the Father, the Son and the Holy Spirit. I replaced the question mark with an exclamation point. It will always be my favorite birthday, the day I was born again — the day I let myself, and my dad, off the hook for being so very human. It turns out neither of us were as good as I thought we were.
The details surrounding my earthly birth — when Dad was in prison while Mom gave birth to me — are interesting but they are not essential. What is essential? I am reconciled, by the blood of Jesus, who my Heavenly Father, who is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow. And because the Holy Spirit lives inside me, I am never alone. I am never without help.
The more I get to know my Heavenly Father, the more I learn about myself, the very thing my soul has always longed for. As much as I hoped my dad could tell me the story of my identity, even on his best day it wouldn’t be the full story.
There is something significant and redemptive about the thought that the only person in the world who truly knows me is the very one who created me. And it turns out he not only likes me — he loves me.
Amanda Harding values beauty, growth and vulnerability. Alongside her husband, Joe, Amanda finds joy in raising their five children in Ocala, Florida. Amanda has published a memoir titled The Woman of the House , several children’s books, prayer journals and has written for publications such as The Orlando Sentinel, Birthing Magazine and Business Insider. She is currently working on her second memoir titled “The Doula’s Guide to Crisis”.
Norton Photography
Amanda being held by her mother at birth.
(Photo provided by Amanda Harding.)
Dave Ramsey is a seven-time #1 national best-selling author, personal finance expert, and host of The Ramsey Show, heard by more than 18 million listeners each week. He has appeared on Good Morning America, CBS This Morning, Today Show, Fox News, CNN, Fox Business, and many more. Since 1992, Dave has helped people regain control of their money, build wealth, and enhance their lives. He also serves as CEO for Ramsey Solutions.
Big Changes
Dear Dave,
I’m getting married this summer and about to become a stepmom. To be honest, I’m a little worried about the family dynamic. My fiancé’s daughter from an earlier marriage is 23, has trouble holding a job and still lives at home. We both agree he has been too lenient with her in the past. He wants to change things, but neither of us believe suddenly pulling the rug out from under her is a good idea. Do you have any advice for handling this situation?
Susie
Dear Susie,
By Dave Ramsey
Phase two might consist of requiring her to help around the house doing chores. After a couple of months of this, phase three might be introducing her to the practice of paying a small amount in rent each month.
Do you see what I’m doing, Susie? By stepping up expectations gradually, you’re building a foundation so she’ll have the tools and knowledge she needs to move out and live like a fully-functioning adult should.
God bless you all!
Dear Dave,
—
Dave
If you and her dad really want to show her you love her, you’ll make sure she starts learning some character and discipline. It’ll take a little time at this point, and it’s very important that both of you are in agreement every step of the way.
Marriage counselors say you have a good chance of a successful marriage if you’re in agreement on four things—religion, money, children and in-laws. I know you and your fiancé love each other, but I’d strongly suggest you two go through pre-marital counseling to make sure you’re on the same page when it comes to handling this and other issues.
After that, I’d recommend letting her dad present any changes to her initially. Neither of you wants to create a scenario where you’re viewed as a villain. Let her dad start the process by explaining that he feels he made a few mistakes in terms of teaching her personal responsibility when she was younger. Then, he can begin to lay out the first few expectations.
In my opinion, there’s nothing wrong with requiring her to get a job within 30 days, if she doesn’t already have one. If she needs to go job hunting, the process should be an everyday thing, because if she’s unemployed, finding work needs to be her full-time job. It would also be to start teaching her about budgeting, saving and everything else that goes into handling money responsibly.
My wife and I have been married for nine months, and we’ve been following your Baby Steps plan for three months. We have about $50,000 in debt, and I recently cashed out an old whole life policy that enabled us to pay off $22,000 of our debt. My wife still feels weird about us doing that, since the money paid off all the student loan debt she accumulated before we got married. I look at everything as ours, not mine and hers. What can I do about her sense of guilt and feeling indebted to me?
Anonymous
Dear Anonymous,
This isn’t uncommon in situations like yours. But more than feeling indebted to someone or experiencing a sense of guilt or shame, it’s really a discussion about differing views of marriage. You’re never in debt to your spouse. You should be all in where your husband or wife is concerned. Remember the vows? For richer, for poorer. In sickness and in health. If she makes you chicken soup when you’re sick, does she charge you for it? Of course not. When you get married , you agree
A MASCULINE CHALLENGE
THE WORKBOOK COMPANION, YEAR-LONG, 4-PART SERIES PERSONAL OR MEN’S GROUP STUDY.
Being a MAN, born MALE, and the unique traits of MASCULINITY all have special places and divine roles in the Heavenly Father’s creation. It is time that we recapture God’s holy definitions from the lies of this world.
We’ve had enough haven’t we, Men? Enough of the soft, passive, and safe men’s group studies where guys sit around and chat about stuff but never activate or accomplish anything great for the Kingdom by following the King of Kings’ directives. And guess what? The church body of believers is sick and tired of men just talking.
Let’s be MEN OF ACTION. Let’s TAKE BACK TERRITORY for the Lord’s Kingdom. Let’s be willing to GO BEHIND ENEMY LINES to rescue the lost.
My brave brothers in the Lord, there’ll be no beating around the bush here. No fluff. No excuses. No vagueness. No fear of truth. This journey is for courageous Men of God and Men of Action. It’ll flush out the posers, flakes, and fakes.
This study will challenge you. “Bring it on!” you say. Great! Here we go.
The first challenge is: Making a COMMITMENT to this study journey.
to take on each other’s burdens. Once you walk down the aisle with someone, you’re choosing to serve each other. You’re also choosing to take on each other’s debt, each other’s income, each other’s assets and each other’s crazy parents. Everything! It all boils down to sharing a proper view of the marriage relationship. And the proper (biblical) view is we own everything. There’s no mine and yours anymore. Now, you can’t make her feel a certain way. But you can ask her questions to understand where she’s coming from and what’s blocking her from being totally together in this. Talk about it. Put your heads together and practice thinking about your marriage as a union.
—Dave
Dear Brenda,
There’s nothing wrong with either approach, especially during a kid’s first semester in college. As a parent, though, I’d urge you not to fall into the trap of thinking his grades will go down if he holds a job while in school. Research shows that, on average, kids who work while in college carry higher grade point averages than those who don’t.
The reasons for this differ, depending on who you ask, but I think a lot of it has to do with them having to learn to manage their time and their lives more effectively. Lots of kids could pay their way through school, and not have to worry about student loans, if they used some of the time they spent watching screens and on social activities at a job.
Dear Dave,
Our son will be graduating from high school in May and heading off to college in August. He will also be working during the summer to save up money for school. When classes begin, do you think he should continue working part-time, or would it be better for him to focus solely on his studies?
Brenda
We never required our kids to work during the school year, but they were self-starters. And when they came home for the summer, there was no such thing as just lying around the house all day. They had jobs, and they made money. Of course, some of it went toward having a little fun during their time off. But we made sure they set some aside for the next school year, too.
Long story short, the philosophy of not wanting kids at college to work so they can spend all their time studying is wellmeaning, but misguided. For the most part, kids who work while they’re in school will make better grades and develop into more mature and well-rounded individuals.
I hope this helps, Brenda!
—Dave
Religious Freedom in Mexico
By Michelle Adserias
“If the government does not intervene to protect religious minorities, I see no reason why the trend of increased persecution will not continue.” These words were spoken by Nate Lance, advocacy manager for International Christian Concern (ICC) in a 2016 interview with Fox News. Lance wasn’t wrong. In the almost 10 years since this statement, persecution against Christians has indeed increased.
According to Open Doors UK, Mexico has moved up six ranks on their World Watch List over the past several years. They are currently ranked 31 among the top 50 countries where persecution is prevalent (up seven spots since 2023).
In northern Mexico, any church, church leader, or ministry that takes a stand against the drug cartels and violent gangs is targeted because they dare to speak out against illegal drug activities and human trafficking and are unwilling to take bribes. When they can’t be silenced, those involved in nefarious activities strike out with beatings, property destruction and, in extreme cases, murder. The persecution is not limited to any one denomination. Both Catholic and Protestant churches and leaders are under fire.
In some of the southern Mexican states, the persecution is targeted specifically at Protestant believers who have rejected the syncretism that dominates the culture in this region.
Syncretism is common in many areas of the world. It’s the blending of two or more religious traditions into a new belief system. The Universalist Unitarian Church, which has embraced a blend of multiple religions, is an example of a syncretic religion.
Although the laws of Mexico guarantee religious freedom for all its citizens, hateful and violent acts against Christians go largely unchecked. The government does its best to downplay and dismiss crimes committed against the Protestant minority.
Suffering for Christ’s Sake
In 2015, village officials in Chiapas illegally seized land from 30 Protestant families after cutting off their access to water and sewer services for a week. Appeals to regional and national government officials were ignored, despite Mexican laws that ensure freedom of religion for all its citizens.
In 2016, nine Christian families were forced from their homes, which were subsequently destroyed. Despite government promises to address the situation, it continues to escalate.
“In northern Mexico, any church, church leader or ministry that takes a stand against the drug cartels and violent gangs is targeted.”
In Chiapas, Oaxaca and Yucatan states in particular, Catholicism has been merged with traditional beliefs. The result is a host of religious celebrations and rituals that dominate community life. Those who choose not to participate because of their faith in Christ are not just ostracized, they come under attack.
“They [syncretists] will try to force them [Protestants] to convert, and if they refuse, they are banned from the villages, unable to live with or see their families,” continued Lance. “When they refuse to recant their faith, they are expelled from the community.” In many cases, people are also illegally detained and/or beaten, and their children are denied access to schools.
In 2020, five families in the same community lost their homes and fields when they refused to participate in religious ceremonies that violated their faith. That same year, 33 evangelical Christians were forced to leave their neighborhood in San Cristobel de las Casas with nothing but the clothes on their backs. They became refugees in their own homeland and dependent on basic supplies provided by local churches who came to their aid.
In 2022, a church member was tied to a tree, severely beaten and subsequently hospitalized in critical condition.
In May of 2024, Open Doors USA reported that in Chiapas state alone, more than 3,000 people (both believers and non-believers) had decided to leave their homes to escape the ongoing clashes between criminal groups and cartels fighting over the territory. These conflicts also prompted more than 100 evangelical churches to close their doors for the safety of their pastors and congregations.
A Ray of Hope
While people in this region are still facing trials, there are some signs that government officials are finally taking notice and are willing to intervene.
The Christian Post recently reported that Hidalgo community leaders forcibly removed 150 Christians who attended a local Baptist church from their homes in April, 2024. The families had their electricity cut off, were blocked from their homes and witnessed their church being vandalized. The group endured poor living conditions for six months, relying
To gather with God’s people in united adoration of the Father is as necessary to the Christian life as prayer.
— Martin Luther
Friendship is not a reward for our discrimination and good taste in finding one another out. It is the instrument by which God reveals to each the beauties of the others.
— C.S. Lewis
on donations from local churches for food, water and personal hygiene items. These sub-standard living conditions resulted in the spread of illness, infection and disease.
Finally, in November of 2024, newly-elected State Secretary Reyna and Director of Religious Affairs Roman intervened. The parties involved reached an agreement and the families returned home. A criminal investigation is under way to determine what restitution should be made to the families. The local government’s actions were clearly a violation of Mexico’s religious freedom laws.
The Christians in this community had someone to advocate for them and help resolve their problem. What about believers in other communities?
Over 20 evangelical churches and 40 missions have joined forces to form the Nacional Nueva Generacion, a united front that not only leverages their political clout on behalf of those who are being persecuted, but mutually supports and encourages everyone involved. They engage the media when people in the church are targeted, to raise awareness of the ongoing persecution — something which the government would prefer stayed out of the news.
Does the persecution continue? Yes. But the churches and ministries involved are also seeing God at work. God has reached many hearts, turning them away from witchcraft and
pagan practices toward hope in the only true and living God. Despite threats on their lives and imprisonment, pastors and faithful believers continue to openly, faithfully preach God’s word.
PRAY our brothers and sisters in Christ will continue to stand firm in their faith when they are tested.
PRAY that God will meet their physical needs and be their constant hope and strength while protecting them from those who would harm them.
PRAY for the local, state and national Mexican government officials, that their hearts will be inclined to uphold religious liberty laws and to protect all their people.
PRAY about whether or how God would have you support believers in Mexico.
Declutter Your Heart and Your Home
By Julia Ubbenga [Zondervan]
Do you long for a richer life? One with meaning, purpose, and simplicity? One that’s lighter, freer, and more focused on who and what matters?
As women who are busy, stressed out, and living in survival mode, we feel desperate for peace with ourselves, our families, our homes, and God. But we often don’t know how to find it.
One good place to begin is clearing out the clutter, first in our hearts, then in our homes. Julia Ubbenga, creator of the popular blog Rich in What Matters, is a trustworthy guide and companion as she shares the tips, tricks, and inspiring lessons she’s learned on her own journey to minimalism. Her book will help you tackle unhealthy habits that disorder your life, redefine your relationship with money and stuff, find freedom from hurry, chaos, and consumerism, and reclaim God’s peace in your heart and your home.
Live Life Strong
By Stephen Marshall [Self-Published]
Your life matters, so whether you’re seeking spiritual growth, emotional healing, or a deeper understanding of your identity and purpose, this book will serve as a beacon of light. In a world where challenges and uncertainties abound, the pursuit of a life filled with strength is a necessity.
Live Life Strong tackles a variety of timely topics, everything from temptation, fear, and depression to success, health and AI. Marshall also addresses our desire to invent personal doctrines, outside of God’s unchanging truths, when prayers seem to go unanswered and God seems to disappoint.
Each chapter offers a QR code to quickly reference additional teaching, prayers, and worship songs related to the topic and concludes with a simple prayer, guided by scripture.
Christ’s victory is certain. His championship on the cross is complete. God has called us to soar like eagles. Will you receive or reject His call?
Now Over Next
By Hope Reagan Harris [Estherpress]
Rather than chasing after the satisfaction the world offers but never delivers this interactive book emboldens women to pursue the abundant life God offers.
The fear of missing out tricks us into focusing so much on keeping up, joining in, and staying ahead that we miss the present moment.
In Now Over Next, Hope Reagan Harris shows us that the abundant life God gives isn’t something to attain in the future but to experience right now.
For all of us who are so determined to move forward that our souls get left behind, Now Over Next includes a framework for getting unstuck spiritually and embracing the promises of God, testimonies from women who have discovered their God-given stories, and engaging prompts for journaling and reflection.
Let go of trying to keep up with this world so you can see what God is doing in and through your life.
Every Hour I Need You
By Katie Faris [Crossway]
From early mornings to sleepless nights and busy activity schedules in between, motherhood is difficult, sanctifying work. Confronted with the struggles and unknowns of raising children, women are reminded daily of their need for help, and from this awareness comes the heart cry of every mother: a longing to be known and loved through it all.
Having raised five children, Katie Faris understands the challenges of parenting and the importance of remembering God’s provision and providence. In Every Hour I Need You, she helps women contemplate God’s unchanging character and discover how His purposes are at work, even in the everyday moments of motherhood. These 30 brief devotions focus on distinct characteristics of God — including His sovereignty, generosity, and patience — inviting women to know Him more through His word, experience deeper spiritual affections and stronger faith, and serve Christ through the care of their families at home.
Storm Warning
By Elizabeth Goddard [Revell]
Haunted by a half-forgotten past, former army photographer Remi Grant is working at an isolated stormwatching lodge on the Washington coast when she receives a mysterious puzzle piece, a catalyst to unlock a disturbing incident she struggles to remember — the event that sent her into hiding. But with heavy storms rolling in, she must focus on the present, not the past.
When a mysterious man saves her life, more than once, Remi becomes suspicious and confronts him. After a catastrophic event in his own life, former military pilot Hawk Beckett is trying to get some perspective at the suggestion of his former commanding officer. Faced with the fiercest storm to hit the coast in a decade, Remi and Hawk are forced into survival mode.
But they’re not alone at the lodge. Someone doesn’t want Remi to remember — and will stop at nothing to see her dead.
Testament: 30 Days of Remembrance
By Darlene Zschech [David C Cook]
This immersive journey into worship and reflection pairs daily devotions from Darlene Zschech with her iconic songs, offering a powerful combination of Scripture, music, and personal insights to deepen your faith.
Song and Scripture come together in this beautiful interweaving of worship, faith, and spiritual growth. Testament is a unique devotional experience that provides:
• Thirty devotions that expand on themes in Darlene’s songs
• Biblical insights into why God calls us to individual and corporate worship
• Daily spiritual nourishment and application through Darlene’s stories and reflections
• QR codes that lead to a multi-sensory devotional time incorporating Darlene’s songs and additional content
With her years of experience and passion for worship, Darlene brings a rich perspective to every devotion in Testament as she connects the messages of her songs with the truths of Scripture.
When the Light Finds Us
B y Judy Henderson
[Worthy Publishing]
Judy Henderson was a single mother with a successful small business of her own when she was convicted of a crime she did not commit. Sentenced to life in prison, Henderson faced the untenable: leaving her young children as she entered the brutal prison system. Even then, Henderson persevered. She never lost sight of her innocence — or her role as a mother. She gained new purpose, fighting for her clemency and for the rights of incarcerated women. Henderson finally received a full pardon after nearly thirty-five years behind bars. When the Light Finds Us is a gripping narrative that explores the depths of human resilience and the transformative power of hope. Henderson’s story will inspire readers to persevere through their own struggles. In a world often filled with darkness, Judy Henderson’s journey is a beacon of light, illuminating the path to redemption and the triumph of justice.
The Parent’s Battle Plan/ Warfare Parenting
By Laine Lawson Craft [Chosen/Broadstreet]
You are not alone. There is hope and healing for every hurting heart.
Today’s technology has made sinful experiences and deadly choices accessible to our teenagers and young adults with just a click. Parents are left with the disappointments — and devastating fallout — of their children’s choices.
In The Parent’s Battle Plan, Laine Lawson shares her own story of praying three wayward prodigals home. She offers not only hope and insight, but also a practical, tried-and-true battle plan for parents walking this heartbreaking season of life.
In Warfare Parenting, the companion devotional, Laine shares life-giving Scripture, hope-filled insight, and battle-cry prayers that helped her rise above discouragement as God restored her family. This 365-day devotional will help you seek God’s comfort, restore your faith and entrust your child to God’s care.
Armed with love, prayer, and God’s transformative power, become a warrior parent who never stops fighting for your child.
A police officer pulled a guy over for speeding and had the following exchange:
Officer: May I see your driver’s license?
Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got my 5th DUI (Driving Under the Influence).
Officer: May I see the owner’s card for this vehicle?
Driver: It’s not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That’s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the owner’s card in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There’s a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That’s where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the trunk.
Officer: There’s a BODY in the TRUNK?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his captain. The car was quickly surrounded by more police cars, and the captain approached the driver to handle the tense situation.
Captain: Sir, can I see your license?
Driver: Sure. Here it is. It was valid.
Captain: Whose car is this?
Driver: It’s mine, officer. Here’s the registration.
Captain: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there’s a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there’s no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Captain: Would you mind opening your trunk? I was told you said there’s a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
The trunk was opened; no body.
Captain: I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn’t have a license, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the trunk.
Driver: Yeah? I’ll bet he told you I was speeding, too.
From Mikey’s Funnies www.mikeysfunnies.com
If you have a joke or funny story you’d like to share, email editor@todayschristianliving.org. If we print your joke, we’ll pay you $25.
By Michelle Adserias
FA Godly Heritage
rom time to time, I research my family tree. As I dig for information, I look not only for genetic links, but spiritual links — evidence of God’s hand at work through the generations.
My paternal grandma faithfully followed Christ. She raised her children in a godly way and served her non-believing husband for over 50 years, living out 1 Corinthians 7:13, “And a woman who has an unbelieving husband, and he consents to live with her, she must not send her husband away.” In the end, God honored her faithfulness and redeemed my grandpa, her children, and many of her grandchildren and great grandchildren.
Both of my maternal grandparents were raised in Christian homes. At least two of my great grandparents were descendants of Mennonite families who came to America to escape persecution.
In Deuteronomy 5:9, God says He will inflict “the punishment of the fathers on the children, even to the third and fourth generations of those who hate me.” That’s a sobering
thought — and a sound warning. I have some sin-bents I’m not eager to pass on to future generations.
But our hope lies in Deuteronomy 5:10 where God continues, “but showing favor to thousands, to those who love me and keep my commandments.”
I am awed by the unfathomable depths of God’s love and mercy. His judgment against evil has a four-generation shelf life. That’s a long time. But His blessings for righteousness won’t expire for a thousand generations. He blesses obedience 250 times longer than He curses rebellion. And my own life is proof! I am 11 generations removed from my ancestors who left Europe to freely pursue the God they loved and worshipped. Who knows how many generations before them were sincere believers?
A godly heritage is the most valuable inheritance we can leave our children; a life devoted to prayer not only for our children, and their someday children, but the generations to come; a life of obedience inspired by God’s unfailing love and incomprehensible holiness; a lifetime of stories to tell about God’s faithfulness to our families.
Emily T. Wierenga
Emily T. Wierenga is the author of the memoirs God Who Became Bread, Atlas Girl and Making it Home, as well as the self-help resource Chasing Silhouettes: How to Help a Loved One Battling an Eating Disorder. In 2014, she was used by God to establish The Lulu Tree Foundation, a nonprofit that operates in villages around the world, equipping families to become sustainable through the local church. To learn more, visit emilytwierenga.com
By Emily T. Wierenga
Confessions of a Former Anorexic
Who Now Hungers for God
It’s a prayer of sorts, this groaning in my stomach.
A hungry cry. I lie in the darkness and count my ribs, like a Catholic girl counting rosary beads.
I’m thirteen and I’ve stopped eating. It’s been a slow stop, one that began when I turned nine and will end tomorrow with me in a hospital bed.
I don’t know that it will end, though. All I know is I’m supposed to be entering grade eight in two days and instead, my parents have told me I’ll be admitted into the general hospital.
And even as I turn on my side and stare at the pale floral wallpaper of my bedroom, I remember.
I remember Africa with her bright sounds and smells and colors. I remember Mum laughing as she punched bread dough in our little house in the Congo and the dough rising high and warm and round. Dad’s beard was scruffy as he carried me everywhere he went and his skin was brown from the sun.
late, but he wouldn’t see me. He would slip into his office and I would cry myself to sleep.
I got baptized at age eight because Dad said I should and I was scared of hell. But the water barely touched my hair. I longed for immersion.
I stopped eating one year later, because it seemed easier somehow. Easier than eating and never getting full.
Dad and Mum drive me to the hospital, now, and the nurses stare at my blue, hypothermic skin. I shiver inside the hospital gown and climb into the starched sheets of the hospital bed. Mum has brought my teddy bear for me. My nails are breaking and I feel old and tired. And that’s when Mum tells me I’m a miracle.
“He feeds me the love I’ve been starving for.”
I was a missionary kid and we were together there. Mum taught blind women how to knit and Dad taught blind men how to farm. We planted a garden – rows of beans and lettuce – and the red soil held the seeds like Dad held me. The seeds burst out of their skin and stretched tall. Then they fed us. My brother grew there, too. He arrived early and purple like a kidney bean and then he began to stretch tall. Soon we played together in the dirt. Mango juice dripped from our chins and the church was bursting with bright dresses, dancing and the sound of hallelujahs. Communion was incarnational in Africa.
But then we moved back to Canada, to its white snow and its big, silent houses. Dad became a pastor and locked himself in his office and Mum hid behind her books. Occasionally, she emerged to homeschool us and make bread, but she didn’t laugh anymore, and the bread didn’t rise as much in the cold Canadian air.
Communion became a dry affair, Mum tearing up little pieces of brown bread and filling tiny liturgical chalices with splashes of grape juice.
Sometimes, after my bath, I would sit on the stairs, waiting for my father to come home. He would arrive
The nurses say it, actually. They say I shouldn’t be alive at sixty pounds and five foot nine. And yet, I am. And suddenly, I feel someone carrying me. I feel the arms of a Father around me. He has been there the whole time, waiting for me, but I didn’t see Him. My Abba.
He feeds me the love I’ve been starving for. It’s bright like an African woman’s dress and it sounds like hallelujah and it tastes like mango juice dripping down my chin.
He holds me close and He laughs and it immerses me, washes me, like a baptism.
And even as I rise from the bed, from the dead, and my hair grows long and I stretch tall like the seeds, Abba teaches me how to believe. It looks a lot like being carried.
When I’m full grown and a mother, I travel with Him back to Africa. I meet other mothers whose songs fill the blackest of nights and together we believe God for enough food to feed their children’s stomachs. Then God takes me to Asia and again, I join mothers in believing God will feed them and their children – and He does. He fills them, even as He’s filled me.
And I carry their stories back home to a church that is hungry for true communion. I share my story of a Father who filled my mouth with food and laughter. And I’m praying we believe, church, so we’ll never go hungry again.
