==== ==== For more great marriage saving tips and advice, visit: www.revitaliseyourmarriage.com ==== ==== Use Communication to Save Your Marriage Communication plays an extremely important role within a marriage. The main reason that a marriage starts to fall apart is because there is a breakdown in the communication between the couple. Openness and honesty is vital to get your needs and the needs of your spouse met. By shutting your spouse out of ones life by refusing to talk or to listen to them, a marriage is placed on a course of almost definite destruction. Among other things, communication is about sharing your thoughts and feelings with one another and listening and spending time thinking about what was said in order to resolve any issues. A couple needs open communication in order to be able to share their thoughts and feelings. Bottled up emotions usually leads to resentment, arguments, and problems when the emotions are inevitably released. Good open communication depends on stating your issue in a calm and respectful manner. By sharing what is in your heart with your spouse, you can achieve a greater and deeper intimacy. Use the words 'I think' rather then 'I feel' in a sentence. This way you have expressed a thought and not a feeling. Or, when addressing a persons behavior use the sentence When you [fill in the issue here] it makes me feel. This is a great way to get your partner to fully understand your emotions and reactions. When on the receiving end of the issue at hand, remember to take the time to listen to your partner. Merely hearing what the person is saying and listening are two different things. To fully understand what the other person is saying, you need to let your partner say everything he or she has to say, and then react to them in an equally calm and respectful manner. Remember not to reject your spouses feelings by saying things like 'Don't worry, be happy' or 'You shouldn't feel that way.' Rejecting a feeling is rejecting the person feeling it. The key to staying calm and respectful after hearing your partners issue with your behavior is to not react at the time you hear the complaint. Take time to think about their feelings, your feelings, and how the issue has affected you, your spouse and your marriage. When you react first without stopping to think, you are reacting with your feelings rather then your thoughts. Shouting and screaming to resolve a problem will not help and they will not make your spouse understand your feelings any better. The most important thing is finding a solution to resolve the problem. Nothing is achieved by hoping the problem will just disappear or focusing on the point that there may not be a solution to your problem. There is always a solution to every problem but, the solution usually depends on behavior modification on both of your parts. Changing the way you communicate is definitely effective when it comes to saving your marriage.
Although it might be hard at first, it is better than resorting to divorce when the relationship turns bad.
==== ==== For more great marriage saving tips and advice, visit: www.revitaliseyourmarriage.com ==== ====
Published on Jan 10, 2012