BEAR BRIGADE by Scott Donnelly and Joe Douglass
Fourth Draft 9/08/09
FADE IN: INT. CAVERNOUS HALLWAY. - UNKNOWN A BURLY MAN stalks down a shadowy hallway wearing a turn of the century Panama hat. He kicks open a door and storms into a... LAB. - SAME Three SCIENTISTS and a GENERAL jolt as the door flies open. BURLY MAN (furiously) What in the name of almighty tarnation have you men done?! GENERAL We understand the seriousness of the error, Mr. President. We pull back to reveal that the Burly Man is TEDDY ROOSEVELT. SCIENTIST #2 But, we’ve come up with a solution. think it will work.
TEDDY ROOSEVELT Oh, you have, have you? What is it?! The Scientists take a step back, revealing an old fashioned TEDDY BEAR lying beside a bizarre looking ANCIENT BOOK. TR’s eyebrow raises, curiously. DISSOLVE TO: INT. KID’S BEDROOM. - NIGHT A modern day bedroom. CHRISTOPHER KEENAN, a mousy ten year old, lies in bed. He’s baby faced and small for his age. Tucked close under his arm is a brown teddy bear; MR. FUZZY WUZZY FACE. KATE, his mom, sits beside him still wearing her waitress uniform. She’s in her thirties, attractive though a little worn around the edges. The lights are off except for the radiant GLARE from a large NIGHTLIGHT. She eyes it, then gently looks at him.
KATE Christopher, why don’t we try turning the nightlight down just a little bit for tonight. CHRISTOPHER I’d rather not. KATE Just a little bit. She leans down and slides the fader down about half-way, dimming the room. KATE How’s that? Not so bad, right? CHRISTOPHER Turn it up a little, please. She does. CHRISTOPHER A little more. It’s all the way back up at the top. CHRISTOPHER That’s good. She smirks and moves to the edge of the bed. KATE Christopher, one of these days you’re going to have to learn to sleep without the night light. CHRISTOPHER (sheepishly) I know mom. Just not tonight... KATE Okay, but then why don’t we try sleeping without Mr. Fuzzy Wuzzy Face, tonight? You’re a big enough boy now that you don’t need a teddy bear anymore. (nudging the bear) And he’s looking a little weathered these days anyway. Christopher pulls Fuzzy closer. CHRISTOPHER No, I don’t think so.
KATE All right, but there’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark. There’s no such thing as monsters, right? CHRISTOPHER (unconvinced) Right. He pulls Fuzzy even closer. KATE Good night, honey. She smiles and exits, closing the door behind her. Christopher eyes a dark corner of the room for a moment and then pulls Fuzzy closer to him. CHRISTOPHER Goodnight, Fuzzy. He closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep... DISSOLVE TO: CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - LATER Christopher is sound asleep. The wind rustles outside the window and we hear a SCRATCHING NOISE. PAN over Christopher’s peaceful face to the bear in his arms. More scratching from outside and suddenly... Mr. Fuzzy Wuzzy Face SPRINGS TO LIFE and pops his head up. His ears PERK at the noise. He looks toward the window and begins to carefully remove himself from Christopher’s arms. Dropping down to the floor, he shakes out his limbs, like someone who’s been cooped up for a while, and suddenly we see his normally doughy bear physique become burly and muscular; the pot belly comes in, the chest pops out, the arms bulge. He crouches down and eyes the window with a menacing glare. A SHADOW appears in the window which quietly begins to slide OPEN until... WHAM. Fuzzy launches into a flying karate kick, smashing into whatever is in the window sill, and disappears into the darkness... CUT TO:
EXT. LAWN. - SAME A ruckus through the bushes and onto the lawn where Fuzzy untangles himself from a horrible looking GOBLIN that SNARLS at him. About the same size as Fuzzy, it is black with beady eyes, leathery skin and menacing claws. They separate and circle each other, staring each other down. The camera circles and TECHNO MUSIC kicks in as they pounce and launch into a crazy fight scene (a la The Matrix/Hero.) Fuzzy and the goblin trade a series blows that send them across the lawn and up to the roof. They continue to trade blows until Fuzzy corners the goblin at the edge of the roof. Ready for a last stand, it snarls as Fuzzy gives a loud bird sounding WHISTLE. Suddenly, THREE other BEARS appear on the roof from every direction. One holds a YO-YO, another a SPATULA, another a SLINGSHOT. The goblin begins to back away. One bear swings the yo-yo around and whacks the goblin in the head as the other slips the spatula under his feet and flips him off the side of the roof. We hear a thud, a grunt and some scurrying as they watch the goblin dart off with his tail between his legs. The bears slap high fives for a job well done. EXT. HAZELTON STREETS. - NIGHT The four bears patrol the streets of Hazelton, a quaint New England town filled with lush trees and old colonial houses. They search the neighborhood’s dark corners for more goblins. Fuzzy, the handsome alpha bear is accompanied by: SALLY, a bookish looking girl bear with glasses; BUTTONS, a scrawny dopey looking bear who’s not the brightest of the bunch. And ARCHIE, the largest and toughest of the bears whose rough demeanor is offset by the blue bonnet and bib stitched to him and the pacifier that hangs around his neck. FUZZY Do I look “weathered” to you guys? ARCHIE Weathered? No, you look old...and disheveled and you really look like you could use a wash. FUZZY So I can look as fresh and clean as your bib?
ARCHIE (suddenly angry, he grabs the bib and shakes it) It’s sewed on!...There’s nothing I can do about it... The other three laugh. Fuzzy looks around the corner of a house and scans the back yard. BUTTONS (dimly, with a lisp) I don’t think that you look very weathered. You don’t have any snow on you or rain or anything. FUZZY Um, thank you Buttons. SALLY I think you look good. She smiles...Romance? FUZZY Thank you Sally. Suddenly, Archie stops in his tracks, sniffing at the air. Stop.
They all halt. Archie sniffs at the air again and looks around. ARCHIE (CONT’D) Do you smell that? FUZZY (alarmed) Goblins? Fuzzy, Sally and Buttons strike fighting poses. Archie casually sniffs at Buttons. ARCHIE Did your owner pee the bed on you again? Yeah...
They are grossed out. ARCHIE That’s gross.
BUTTONS It’s not my fault. I can’t control it...Besides, it’s normal. ARCHIE Normal...right. BUTTONS He doesn’t mean to do it. It’s just that he drank too much apple juice last night and you know how he gets when he drinks too much. He loses control and does things he regrets and he’s sorry for it but then it happens again-Fuzzy and Sally look behind some garbage cans. FUZZY It’s okay, Buttons, it happens to the best of us. Archie gives Fuzzy a weird look. Not to me.
FUZZY I said the best of us. Archie grunts. Suddenly HEADLIGHTS shine down the street as a night policeman cruises their way. Instantly, they dart behind every available cover; bushes, cars, a mailbox, until he passes and then continue on patrol. EXT. HAZELTON STREETS. - DAWN Fuzzy quietly climbs into Christopher’s bedroom window. In the background we see other bears heading towards the windows of other houses. Fuzzy gently slides into bed with Christopher. The first rays of light begin to shine through the window...as Christopher’s eyes groggily open. INT. KITCHEN. - MORNING Kate dishes out eggs for GRANDPA, 75, a gruff, tough talking ex-coal miner who still has a lot of fight left in him. KATE Dad, just let it go. It’s just an old well.
GRANDPA (pissed off) Sure, it’s old. Just let it go. Let everything go that’s old. That well is an important piece of the history of this town. Like me. Do you want to throw me away? KATE Sometimes...You’re starting to get a little nutty, dad. You sure it’s not time to visit the Home for Old Kooks? GRANDPA Don’t be a smarta-(seeing Christopher enter and catching his tongue) --aleck... Christopher sits at the table. KATE (dishing food onto Christopher’s plate) Good morning, honey... (to Grandpa) I just don’t see what’s so important about some silly old well. GRANDPA Of course you don’t. It’s not from Crate and Barrel. What good could it be? (to Christopher) You see Christopher, it’s about preserving history. A lot went into making this town... Things you can’t even imagine. Christopher starts to mouth along with him by rote. Grandpa doesn’t notice. GRANDPA (CONT’D) When I was your age I was working ten hours a day in the coal mines. I had slices of tire strapped to my feet for shoes. We didn’t have Playstation. We had coal-station! Our toys were pick axes and shovels. I still have the cough to show for it. Listen to this-(hacks a cough that sounds like it emanates from the bowels of hell) That’s pure coal dust, sonny. KATE Dad, we’re eating.
GRANDPA (more pissed off) You don’t think this is serious, but it is. Close in on grandpa’s serious face and we suddenly get a sense that there is more to this than he is revealing... GRANDPA You have no idea how important it is... EXT. SCHOOL YARD Christopher sits at a table next to MOLLY, a cute girl, and PHONG, a “big boned” Asian boy. They’re each eating school made lunches from trays. In the background other kids play kickball. CHRISTOPHER (playing with his food) Mmmmmm...Pineapple chunks and raisins in jello and meat cubes...Do you think the lunch ladies try to think of the most disgusting food combinations possible or do they actually think this stuff is good? PHONG If you don’t want it, I’ll eat it. CHRISTOPHER I know you will, Phong. MOLLY I think maybe they’re just more passionate about something else in their lives. PHONG (deadpan) I think Mrs. Jaramillo is passionate about fish sticks. Her fish sticks are awesome. Christopher and Molly look at each other and laugh. Christopher gives her a second look that says maybe he’s interested in more... Suddenly, two SHADOWS appear over them. Christopher looks up. Two huge meaty ten year old GOONS stand over him, glaring. Christopher’s face drops. A voice from behind the goons: MICHAEL IMBRUCE Hello Christopher.
The goons part and between them appears MICHAEL IMBRUCE, a nerdy, impish, pint sized ten year old with coke bottle glasses and and a stone cold stare. MICHAEL IMBRUCE (with a menacing nonchalance) I know it’s sort of cliche, the whole taking snack money thing, but I don’t do it for the humiliation or for the sense of power I get by bending you to my will. It’s really about the money, Christopher. You see, I need the new Gameport 3 and they cost money, and the games cost money and money doesn’t grow on trees. So... While they talk, a goon hassles Phong. GOON #1 Cough up the money. PHONG I didn’t bring any today. The goon grabs Phong and has him by his underwear about to wedgie him... Suddenly, Phong pulls out an INHALER and starts sucking on it, his leg twitches wildly, eyes rolling back in his head. GOON #2 Stop. Stop. He’s gonna die or something. Goon #1 lets him go. GOON #1 He drooled on me. They move down the bench to another kid. Christopher reluctantly reaches into his pocket and hands over two dollars. MICHAEL IMBRUCE Thank you, Christopher. I won’t forget this...until tomorrow. He laughs maniacally and then turns to Molly. MICHAEL IMBRUCE Hello, Molly. You look very pretty today. Perhaps after school you could join me at the Dairy Queen for a Mister Misty... (adding the money to a wad) My treat.
MOLLY The day that I share a Mister Misty with you, Michael Imbruce, is the day that I die. You’re disgusting. I don’t know how you live with yourself. MICHAEL IMBRUCE (with mocking hurt) Yeah, I’m really torn up inside... (to the goons) Hey, guys, you wanna go buy those new iPhones? The goons nod and Michael laughs maniacally as they walk off. CHRISTOPHER I liked the seizure bit. PHONG Was that too much? MOLLY No, it was nice. Very believable. Out on the kickball field, everyone has stopped playing and is preoccupied by some sort of commotion beyond the fence. BEHIND THE SCHOOLYARD. - SAME Behind the school is a construction site where a line of old houses are being knocked down to build new ones. Near the chain link fence is an OLD WELL, sealed with concrete and rocks. At the well, three CONSTRUCTION WORKERS are arguing with GRANDPA who has chained himself to the well by his ankle. CONSTRUCTION WORKER #1 Okay, sir. But why don’t you just please unchain yourself and we’ll talk about it. GRANDPA No! If you crack open this well all hell is gonna break loose. Back off! The kids watch everything, slack-jawed, from behind the fence. Christopher is the most slack-jawed of all. CONSTRUCTION WORKER #1 (brandishing a bolt cutter) Calm down, buddy. Let me just get you undone here.
GRANDPA You take one step closer, buddy, and you’re going to have those bolt cutters undone from where the sun don’t shine. You have no idea what you’re doing! The worker smiles, good-naturedly, and starts to clip the chain. Grandpa NAILS him with a RIGHT CROSS that flattens him. The other construction workers rush Grandpa, who begins knocking them out one by one. FENCE. - SAME A KID looks over at Christopher. KID #2 Hey, isn’t that crazy old man Christopher’s grandpa? KID #3 Yeah, it is...I guess being a wuss doesn’t run in the family. Everyone laughs except Christopher. BEHIND THE SCHOOL. - LATER Grandpa being led away in handcuffs as Christopher and his mom stand with some police. At a nearby ambulance a dozen construction workers stand around with ice packs, bandages and black eyes. POLICE OFFICER Well, Kate, technically I should take him to jail but I think it’s best if we take him to the home. He’s obviously a bit...confused and they can take better care of him there. It’s a nice facility... Kate sighs. KATE (fighting tears) ...I guess that would be better than jail. CHRISTOPHER No, mom, don’t let them take him away! KATE There’s nothing we can do, Christopher. An officer leads Grandpa over.
GRANDPA I’m not crazy, Kate. Behind them, workers take sledge hammers to the old well, CRACKING open the top. GRANDPA I wish you all knew what you are doing. KATE (flustered) What are they doing? What’s going to happen if they knock down an old well?! Grandpa leans in and looks at her very seriously. GRANDPA Something very, very bad... She stares at him like he’s crazy. CHRISTOPHER Grandpa, what are you talking about? GRANDPA (torn) I swore I’d never tell... (whispering) But the Boogie Man is down there. He has to be stopped, Christopher. Kate starts to cry as she realizes her father has completely lost it. He gives Christopher a weird, deliberate NOD. GRANDPA I’ll see you soon, sonny boy... The police officers lead him away. MONTAGE OF BEDROOMS. A) Christopher is sound asleep in bed with Fuzzy in his arms. Fuzzy pops to life and jumps up to the window sill. Other bears gently slide themselves out of the beds of their owners, who all conspicuously resemble their bears... B) Sally tiptoes past Molly to the window. Assorted art posters line the wall. C) Archie climbs away from a pile of toys and sports equipment past a stocky jock kid. D) Buttons climbs out of the bed of Paul, a goofy dork.
E) BAMBOO, a panda bear, jumps down from a dresser and slips past Phong. F) Climbing out of a lonely box in an attic is NIGEL, a tattered old bear dressed in a Victorian era suit with an ascot and pocket watch; he has a big red wine stain across his chest. He descends some stairs and on the way down passes a large goofy school PICTURE of MICHAEL IMBRUCE, smiling. EXT. LYNTON RD. - NIGHT Fuzzy’s patrol (Sally, Archie and Buttons) meets up with another patrol, made up of: BAMBOO, the panda bear. REGGIE, a black bear. DORIS, a girl bear in a classy red dress and hat. And NIGEL, the Victorian bear. DORIS (40’s sassy accent a la “His Girl Friday”) What’s shaking boys? What’s this big meeting all about? BAMBOO (Chinese accent) I don’t know but supposedly it’s important...And stay alert we just saw two goblins heading north on Maple. REGGIE (Chris Rock) We’d a had them too if Mr. Fancy Pants would have gone around the house and headed them off in the driveway like he was supposed to. NIGEL (British accent) Well, there was a dreadful mud puddle in the yard that I wouldn’t dare muck myself through and I’m not about to climb a fence...that’s far too common. REGGIE Well, sometimes in this job Nigel, you’ve got to get your hands dirty... (pointing to the stain) So quit “wining.” Snickers. NIGEL Very amusing, Reginald. But your crude humor about my wine stain doesn’t injure my feelings in the least.
FUZZY Enough bickering...Let’s go see what’s so important. The others turn and start down the street. Fuzzy puts an arm around Buttons. FUZZY (to Buttons) Listen, you just need to keep an eye on the street for maybe a half hour. Can you handle that? BUTTONS Sure, I’ve been needing some “me” time for a while now, anyway. I’ve been feeling kind of uncentered lately-FUZZY That’s great, Buttons, but we just need you to whistle if any goblins come. BUTTONS Oh, yeah. No problem. EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT The elaborate wooden jungle gym at Cooper Park, in the center of town, also doubles as a town square for the bears. Nearly a hundred bears are gathered around in the playground listening to MILTON, the venerable old leader of the Hazelton bears who stands atop a large slide, addressing the crowd gravely. MILTON My fellow bears, I bring terrible news...The well has been opened. A GASP goes through the crowd. MILTON We need the boy. Fuzzy’s jaw drops and a look of dread comes over him. locks eyes with him in the crowd...
EXT. BUSHES. - SAME Buttons is huddled in some bushes by himself with a lascivious grin on his face, thumbing through the “Vermont Teddy Bear” catalog. He stops at the SWIMSUIT BEAR page. BUTTONS Well, hello there, Tropic Delight. You are looking very lovely today in your swimsuit.
I like the way it fits you very much. I know of several pools that will be uncovered in the summer time that perhaps you could join me in... A goblin creeps through the shadows and scampers up a bush right over Buttons’ head and into... INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. Christopher sleeps soundly in bed, a smile on his face. DISSOLVE TO: INT. CASTLE. - DREAM A heated sword fight is taking place in an elaborate medieval throne room. A PINT-SIZED KNIGHT takes out a dozen sword wielding henchmen. As the last one falls, a terrified KING IMBRUCE scrambles behind his throne in fear dragging a resistant and shackled PRINCESS MOLLY, with him. KING IMBRUCE Who dares to challenge King Imbruce, the Lord of All That is Evil, Sinister, Unfair and Humiliating? Show yourself! The knight raises his mask to reveal a confident looking CHRISTOPHER. SIR CHRISTOPHER It is I, Sir Christopher, Bravest and Most Intimidating of all Warriors. Release the Princess and I will spare you. King Imbruce cowers in fear and backs away. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - REALITY The Goblin creeps onto Christopher’s pillow. It latches its hands around Christopher’s head and a sac on his back begins to fill with a strange GOLDEN FLUID. A smile creeps across the goblin’s face as we... DISSOLVE BACK. INT. CASTLE. - DREAM The smile drops from Christopher’s face and the lighting dims to a creepy nightmare ambiance. King Imbruce’s fear suddenly turns to a smile. KING IMBRUCE Spare me the rigamarole. Boys, Get him! Two of Impruce’s goons appear dressed as EXECUTIONERS in black hoods.
Christopher looks down at his hand and notices his sword is now gone. The hooded goons grab Christopher and put him on a hook where he hangs by his underwear, which creeps out of his armor. CHRISTOPHER No, stop it! Suddenly Christopher is on a stage in front of a huge crowd of people wearing medieval garb. Molly sits in the front row with a bunch of other girls laughing. CROWD (chanting) Wedgy! Wedgy! Wedgy! The Executioners strap Christopher’s feet to the floor and the hook starts pulling up, ripping sounds can be heard as Christopher’s underwear is STRETCHED to a ridiculous length. No!
CHRISTOPHER OWwwwwwww! Stop it!
Molly points at him laughing hysterically as... INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - REALITY The sac on the goblin’s back is slowly filling with GOLDEN FLUID as it smiles ecstatically and makes a light cooing noise. Suddenly, a SHADOW appears in the window as Fuzzy appears and yanks it from the bed by the ear. EXT. WELL. - NIGHT A light drizzle falls. THUNDER rumbles in the distance. The demolished well is now little more than a black gaping hole in the ground. Fog hangs above it. Ominous MUSIC as we PAN IN. The fog swirls as two SLIMY GREEN HANDS emerge from the hole and grasp onto the sides... LIGHTNING flashes. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - LATER LIGHTNING outside as Christopher is sound asleep with Fuzzy in his arms. Fuzzy gives him a nudge in the ribs. Christopher stirs awake and looks around, then closes his eyes and pulls the covers up.
CHRISTOPHER Goodnight, Fuzzy. FUZZY Goodnight, Christopher. Christopher’s head pops up. He looks down at Fuzzy who lies motionless on the bed. CHRISTOPHER Fuzzy...Did you say something? Fuzzy’s head pops up. FUZZY Yeah...but don’t freak out. I just need to talk to you about something. Christopher’s jaw drops. He SCREAMS and runs for the door. FUZZY Don’t be scared. I know this is a shock but I just really need to talk to you. Christopher stops and slowly turns around. CHRISTOPHER You’re...alive? FUZZY I’m not normally supposed to do this sort of thing...but we need your help.
CHRISTOPHER What bears? Twenty other bears emerge from everywhere; the closet, under the bed, the toybox, with their hands raised nonthreateningly. Christopher jolts and TRIPS over his school bag. CHRISTOPHER Aaahhhhh!!!! FUZZY It’s okay. We just need your help. CHRISTOPHER Fff...for what?
Milton, the wise old bear steps forward. MILTON We had hoped it would never come to this but it has...You see, Christopher, our job is to protect children while they sleep at night from monsters, who prey on children in their sleep and suck away their happiness to use for their own wretched satisfaction. A group of bears dart toward the window and scan the street. Archie looks alarmed. ARCHIE Weâ€™ve got a live one crossing over to Mollyâ€™s house. CHRISTOPHER A live what? A goblin. Get him.
Archie, Sally and a few other bears climb out the window. A goblin?
FUZZY (motioning him toward the window) Look... Christopher peeks his head out the window and sees the bears dishing out a beating on something dark and shadowy. FUZZY Monsters are miserable creatures incapable of happiness. And the only happiness they can get is the happiness they steal from kids, the purest form of happiness. Kids like you. MILTON And the results are nightmares. Terrible nightmares...Like the one you had tonight. CHRISTOPHER You mean there was a monster in my room tonight?
FUZZY Yes, but it’s okay. We’re here to protect you. Goblins are stupid and unorganized. We’re stronger, smarter and more disciplined-Buttons, who’s been leaning against a lacrosse stick propped against the wall, shifts and FALLS, knocking into a pile of TOYS. FUZZY ...For the most part. But every once in a while, a goblin gets by and you have a bad dream. CHRISTOPHER Then what do you need me for? Christopher goes to peek out the window again and finds himself face to face with a GOBLIN. He jolts back as Sally and PETEY, a bear in a khaki outback outfit drag the goblin into the room by the ears. Its arms and legs are tied with yo-yo string. Christopher dives onto his bed and backs into the corner. PETEY (Ausralian Croc-Hunter accent) No worries, mate. He’s harmless. The goblin squirms around and grunts. FUZZY Like I said, we have the goblin situation under control. They’re really not as tough as they look. PETEY And this one is certainly a tough looking one, isn’t he? He straddles the goblin and grabs him by the ears with Croc Hunter enthusiasm. PETEY Look at the markings on the ears here...These are beauties! This one means he’s probably one of the dominant males. Nasty little bugger but nothing to be worried about, mate. We can handle em. CHRISTOPHER Then what do you need from me?
MILTON Seventy years ago, things were very different...The Boogie Man, a much more powerful monster, came to Hazelton and wrought havoc in the night. SIMULTANEOUS. - FLASHBACK. A black and white FLASHBACK sequence shot in twenties style film stock accompanies Miltonâ€™s speech. Lightning FLASHES. We see the ramshackle wooden shacks of 1930â€™s Hazelton. Ominous MUSIC as a large sinister SHADOW appears. MILTON (V.O.) We were unable to stop him as he turned the goblins into a powerful force, giving the children horrible nightmares every night, sucking every ounce of happiness from their lives. A large group of goblins storms through the woods and descend upon the shacks. Kids in thirties sleeping robes and night caps toss and turn as the goblins suck the golden happiness from them, filling the sacs on their backs. MILTON (V.O.) That is until we revealed our existence to a young boy who was the bravest and strongest of all the children in Hazelton. A gritty tough faced ten year old climbs toward a mine shaft with a pick axe over his shoulder and a cigar in his mouth. He has slices of tire rubber strapped to his feet for shoes. MILTON (V.O.) The boy did what we could not and confronted the Boogie Man, one on one, defeating him and vanquishing him to the bottom of an old well which we sealed shut. Several bears run out of a dark mine shaft, terrified. The boy stands in the entry way, tightens his jaw and walks into the darkness, alone. BACK TO PRESENT. MILTON That boy was Jimmy Callahan. Your grandfather, Christopher...And now the Boogie Man has been released from his prison and we need you to help us defeat him. Christopher is shocked.
CHRISTOPHER Me?! Why me? I’m not the bravest kid in Hazelton. MILTON Because your grandfather knows the secret of how to beat the Boogie Man...and you can learn it from him. Christopher shakes his head and closes his eyes. MILTON If you look inside I know you’ll find some of that same courage. FUZZY Christopher, this goblin was going to Molly’s house. We were able to stop him now, but when the Boogie Man comes, it won’t be this easy. The children of Hazelton need you. Your friends need you. CHRISTOPHER The Boogie Man? I don’t think I can do this. MILTON You must. If we don’t stop him it won’t just be your friends who will suffer the nightmares...It will be you as well. Christopher turns pale. FUZZY I’ll be with you every step of the way. Fuzzy puts an arm around him. FUZZY I know you want to be brave. This is your chance...Can we count on you? Christopher takes a deep breath, looks up and nods. The bears CHEER. CHRISTOPHER (reluctantly) Okay... I guess so. EXT. WOODS. - NIGHT LIGHTNING FLASHES as something moves fast through the woods. FOOTSTEPS. Several goblins scurrying past and stop suddenly. A shadowy green hand reaches out and beckons them to follow... Mesmerized they do.
More goblins begin to follow until scores trail through the woods, following whoever is leading the way. EXT. DRAINAGE SUMP. - NIGHT An enormous mass of goblins follow the shadowy figure into an overgrown drainage sump. On one side is a rock face with an old mine shaft carved into it from days long gone. The shadowy figure climbs a small ridge onto a boulder that functions as a platform and turns...revealing: THE BOOGIE MAN, slimy and green with grotesque purple veins bulging from his oozing, slimy dermis. BOOGIE MAN (menacingly) Booo!!! The goblin horde jolts. The Boogie Man laughs. BOOGIE MAN Itâ€™s been a while...Forgive my indulgence. (relieved) My fellow goblins, allow me to introduce myself. I am the Boogie Man. A gasp through the horde. His voice is surprisingly suave, his demeanor energetic and presentational; a la Tony Robbins. BOOGIE MAN Thank you. My reputation does precede me. But allow me to say that I am the one who is honored to be here, because before me stands a goblin horde of limitless potential. And I see that shining potential in the eyes of each and every goblin here tonight. Shots of the dull eyed, stupid expressions on the goblins faces as they grunt, chew on branches, pick their toenails, etc. BOOGIE MAN But let me ask you this...Despite all that you have going for you, are you satisfied with your lives? Truly satisfied? Be honest. A murmur of grumbles through the crowd. The Boogie Man reaches down and pulls BALTHAZAR, a grumbling wizened old goblin with a blue tint, onto the podium.
BOOGIE MAN You, what is your name, friend? The goblin GRUNTS and slobbers something incomprehensible. BOOGIE MAN Right...And what is it that you want most out of life? More incomprehensible grumbling. BOOGIE MAN Exactly...happiness. It’s what we all want, right? They all nod. BOOGIE MAN But what is it that’s keeping us from getting it?...I’ll tell you. It’s ourselves, keeping ourselves from reaching our full potential. Our potential to obtain unprecedented amounts of happiness for ourselves. The happiness is out there, friends, lying dormant under blankets, asleep, waiting to be taken. What we have to do is get motivated, get smart and go out there and take it! The goblins start to respond and shout a few cheers. BOOGIE MAN And that’s what I’m going to do. I’m going to teach you how to reach your full potential! How to get the happiness that you deserve! Why should children have all the purest happiness while we get stuck with the dank misery of being denizens of the night? It’s our need, our right to take happiness! So, what are we waiting for?! The goblins cheer wildly and jump up and down. BOOGIE MAN (pounding the podium, in an oratorical fervor) It will take teamwork! It will take desire! It will take the will to take back the night from the wretched teddy bears once and for all...And with it more happiness than you can possibly imagine. And we will get it! I promise you...we will take ALL the happiness for ourselves!
CLOSE IN on his lecherous smile as the crowd CHEERS. EXT. ASYLUM. - DAY Christopher rides his bicycle up to an imposing STATE ASYLUM. On the lawn, scary looking crazies chatter and talk to themselves. GRANDPA’S ROOM. Grandpa sits in a wheelchair watching an episode of “Malibu Nights,” a sexy bikini melodrama. A stern looking old nurse, MONA, cuts his food for him. In the next room someone is MOANING miserably. Grandpa turns to see Christopher entering. GRANDPA Sonny boy!! (seeing that he’s creeped out by the moaning) Don’t worry about that guy. I’ve got him on the payroll. He’s doing all my moaning for me. Christopher gives grandpa a hug and sits in the chair across from him. GRANDPA So, what do you think of the new bachelor pad? Palatial, huh? (pointing to the TV) Fabulous entertainment. (pointing to the nurse) Great conversation...And the food, what can I say?...Actually, this stuff makes the Marine Corps chow seem like filet mignon...I guess it could be worse. (pointing to Mona) I could be married to her. Mona shakes her head and stoically moves to change the sheets. GRANDPA I’m just kidding, Mona...I love the new teeth...Hold on a second! Grandpa eyes the TV screen where a gorgeous bikini clad girl is being seduced by a hunky lifeguard. GRANDPA Oh, Stacy, don’t fall for that! Brad always lies! Onscreen they kiss and Grandpa SLAPS the table, disgusted.
GRANDPA You get what you deserve then... (grabbing his stomach in agony) Oh, god...my gut again. Get me some Pepto, will you Mona? Annoyed, she exits. As soon as she’s gone, Grandpa SPRINGS to life and grabs Christopher’s arm. GRANDPA So, they came to you? CHRISTOPHER Yes. They said you’d tell me what I need to do. GRANDPA I’m sorry it’s come to this, Christopher. I tried to stop them from opening the well. Fuzzy pops his head out of the backpack. Hey, Jim.
GRANDPA Hey, Fuzzy. How ya doing? CHRISTOPHER (shocked) You two know each other!? GRANDPA Sure, we’re both stuck home all day. Who do you think I play checkers with? CHRISTOPHER (to Grandpa, realizing) That’s how you found the firecrackers! (pissed, at Fuzzy) I can’t believe you told him about that! FUZZY You could have blown your hand off! My job is to protect you! GRANDPA (eyeing the door) Alright ladies, enough with the slap and tickle. She’ll be back any minute. CHRISTOPHER What do I need to do, Grandpa? GRANDPA You’ve got to scare the Boogie Man back.
CHRISTOPHER What do you mean? How? GRANDPA When I was your age, working in the mines all day I wasn’t afraid of anything because I had nothing to lose. So, when they asked me to help them...I just went and did it. CHRISTOPHER But I’m scared, Grandpa. GRANDPA I know, but he’s going to bring misery to you kids. You have to stop him. CHRISTOPHER I don’t think I can do this. I need you to help me. GRANDPA (rubbing his head sympathetically) They may let me out of here in a few weeks. I’ll clean up my act so they don’t think I’m crazy...But we can’t let it go on that long. You’re going to have to do it yourself. Outside the Door: Mona stops and eavesdrops on the conversation just in time to hear: GRANDPA The Teddy bears will do everything they can for you, but they’re too small to take down the Boogey Man themselves. They need your help... They need you to scare him back. CHRISTOPHER But how do I scare him back? He’s the Boogie Man! Mona, disgusted, shakes her head and enters the room. Fuzzy disappears into the pack. MONA Okay, Mr. Callahan, that’s enough terrorizing your grandson. I think it’s time for some more medication. GRANDPA Of course, more happy pills for the old kook...Godspeed, Christopher. Trust the bears, they’ll help you. And just scare him back!
Mona wheels grandpa for the door. CHRISTOPHER (desperate) Wait! Scare him back how? Grandpa turns as Mona pushes the chair out the door. GRANDPA You’ll know when its time... Just scare him back!! Christopher follows as Grandpa is wheeled through a pair of double doors. A MALE NURSE grabs him. MALE NURSE You can’t go in there son. Christopher throws his hands up, confused. EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT SCORES OF BEARS wait, smiling as Christopher and Fuzzy make their way across the grass. Christopher looks around at all the bears in awe. MILTON (from the podium) My fellow bears, long ago when President Roosevelt deployed us to fight the goblins, children everywhere were in their greatest hour of need. That hour of need has come again. And this time the person who can help us most is Christopher Keenan. The bears all CHEER. Christopher waves shyly. CHRISTOPHER President Roosevelt? MILTON Yes, Christopher. This is much bigger than just Hazelton. FLASHBACK SEQUENCE. EXT. JUNGLE. - SIMULTANEOUS A turn of the century American Marine carries the ANCIENT BOOK from the opening scene under his arm as he exits an ancient stone temple in a sweltering jungle. MILTON (V.O.) A century ago the Department of Defense uncovered a manuscript of incredible mystical power in the Orient.
While experimenting blindly with its contents to find uses for war, a portal to the underworld was briefly opened letting in the goblins. That portal was here in Hazelton. EXT. SNOWY FIELD. - SIMULTANEOUS In a snowy field in a desolate wood, the three scientists from earlier and the general who holds the ancient BOOK, back away terrified from a GLOWING VORTEX that opens in the ground... From the vortex hundreds and hundreds of GOBLINS begin to pour out... MILTON (V.O.) With the goblins unleashed, the keepers of the book used it desperately to animate a set of guardians to fight them... Fortunately, it worked. INT. LAB. - FLASHBACK In the scene from the opening, the first Teddy bear COMES TO LIFE surrounded by the scientists, the general and a SHOCKED Teddy Roosevelt. MILTON We are those guardians.
INT. TOY STORE. - FLASHBACK In a turn of the century toy store, a giant stack of Teddy Bears in boxes lines the front window and children snatch them up by the dozen... BACK TO PLAYGROUND - SAME MILTON Once we were able to restore order to the night, the book was set to be destroyed and the dark secret was to die with the men who unleashed it. ARCHIE Wait... then where did the Boogie Man come from? MILTON The book wasn’t destroyed... And the portal was opened again when Christopher’s grandpa and I were young. SALLY Where is the book? Milton gives her a solemn look, then says to Christopher:
MILTON We’re glad you could join us in our fight. Your grandfather told you what you need to do? Um...
FUZZY Yes. He told us exactly what we need to do and we’re ready. Christopher gives Fuzzy an uncertain look. CHRISTOPHER (whispering) We are? MILTON Excellent...Let’s get down to business, then. Things are going to be different in the coming days, bears. The Boogie Man will turn the goblins against us like you’ve never seen. You’re used to fighting a bunch of half-witted imbeciles. But under the tutelage that’s all going to change... Victory isn’t a guarantee any more. And we need to be ready... GOBLIN TRAINING SEQUENCE. Goblins being trained as ominous music plays. A: The goblins march haphazardly, tripping and falling all over one another. The Boogie Man shakes his head. B: A makeshift obstacle course. The goblins stumble through it, clumsily. At a set of monkey bars, a goblin misses the bar and falls into a pile of others who’ve also fallen. C: Lines of goblins practice hand to hand combat drills. One launches into a kung fu display that sends his opponent to the ground. The Boogie Man smiles and gives an oriental bow. The goblin bows back. A GONG sounds. D: Goblins dart across the obstacle course, this time with athletic ease. E: The Boogie Man surveys his troops from a boulder as they march past, this time in perfect fascist order; eyes forward, chests out, hands at their sides. An army ready for battle. The Boogie Man smiles.
EXT. WOODS. - NIGHT Fuzzy, Christopher, Archie, Buttons and Sally hide in some bushes at the edge of the neighborhood keeping watch. ARCHIE It’s creepy I tell you. It’s not usually this quiet, Christopher. SALLY A week, no goblins. It’s odd. Buttons is hiding on the branch of a tree, looking petrified. FUZZY Buttons, will you come down out of that tree? I need you to run a message for me. BUTTONS Alone? By myself? FUZZY Yes, like you always do. BUTTONS (panicked) But the Boogie Man...Well oiled fighting machine...em, you were there, you heard what Milton said. FUZZY I know. We all did, but I need you to run over to the playground and ask Milton if we should patrol the perimeter or stay put. Just get down here. Buttons climbs down and in the process knocks loose a few pine cones. Startled, he falls out of the tree and darts for cover. What--?
FUZZY (shaking his head) Pine cones... Listen, we’ve all got to keep our heads here. We need to be at our best when the time comes... A sound in the distance. A dull rhythm. Ground crunching. Steady. Footsteps. Marching... All the bears perk their ears. Their eyes widen. The sound closes in. BUTTONS That’s not pine cones.
Over the ridge, silhouetted in the moonlight we see a GOBLIN ARMY, marching in a tight formation, making its way through the woods, straight for Fuzzy & Co.’s position... Uh oh.
Fuzzy WHISTLES. SERIES OF SHOTS. Several other bear patrols hear the whistle and start running towards it. WOODS. Christopher, Fuzzy & Co. watch the goblin formation as it makes its way up the hill towards them. Christopher trembles in fear. FUZZY (pulling it together) Buttons, new message. BUTTONS Message? You want me to run a message? I’d love to run a message. I’ll go all the way to the other side of town if you’d like! FUZZY Get every bear in the neighborhood over here, now. Tell them it’s time. He turns and Buttons is already twenty yards away, sprinting in the opposite direction. A dozen bears show up and see the goblin army coming up the hill. They gulp and go wide-eyed. CHRISTOPHER You’ve got this under control, right? FUZZY Stay by me...This is it, bears. He signals and all twenty of them step out from the bushes, preparing to meet the 300+ goblins coming their way. They grit their teeth and dig in as we... CUT TO: EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT Milton stands atop the jungle gym at Command Central. Buttons sprints like a madman across the grass and takes a tumble in the gravel below the slide.
BUTTONS (out of breath) Pine cones!...Goblins!...Tree...Whole bunch...Help!...Too many... MILTON What are you saying, Buttons? BUTTONS (catching his breath) There’s an...army of goblins...woods east of Foxcroft Street. An army! Send everyone! MILTON And so it begins... (to the other bears nearby) Sound the alarm. All bears to the woods east of Foxcroft Street. Several bears at headquarters nod and give loud BIRD WHISTLES. Atop the top of the jungle gym, Milton stares off, grimly, in the direction of Foxcroft Street. SERIES OF SHOTS. Bear patrols all over the neighborhood hear the whistles, alarmed.
WOODS. Chaos. A furious melee between Fuzzy’s small bear contingent and the goblins. Fists and bodies fly. The goblins SWARM. Things look bleak for the bears. Outnumbered, the bears punch, spin and kick Bruce Lee style but are steadily forced back. Two goblins approach Christopher. He goes to run but others surround him. Fuzzy and the bears charge over, beating the goblins away, just in time. Terrified, Christopher RUNS AWAY. NEIGHBORHOOD. Dozens of bears pour through the streets making their way towards Foxcroft. FOXCROFT STREET. Goblins emerge from the treeline. They look around at the quiet darkened houses and start towards their windows when...
BEARS appear everywhere. They descend on the Goblins as an epic BATTLE erupts a la Braveheart. Armies collide and the fighting is furious. Bears in action: TANK, a bear in a football uniform rams down a few goblins with his helmet, Doris takes them out with her umbrella, Reggie dropkicks a goblin. REGGIE How do you like that, sucka’? The battle continues, pouring into the street until...HEADLIGHTS. In a blink, both sides part and disappear everywhere, behind trees, bushes, cars. The police patrol car cruises by. INT. PATROL CAR. Inside the car, OFFICER KLUMKY, a chubby cop, sips his coffee. Something darts by in his side mirror. He double checks, sees nothing, then turns the corner. STREET. As the car turns, in a flash, both armies descend on each other again as though they never stopped. The battle continues. Fuzzy and his contingent pour out from the trees looking much worse for wear. They stumble away from the melee. SALLY Are these the same goblins? FUZZY Is everyone okay? Some limp, others hunch over exhausted, Archie holds his arm. ARCHIE Define okay. FUZZY Where’s Christopher? The bears look around and shrug. No one knows. FUZZY We need to find Christopher. Whoever’s too injured to fight, head back to HQ and get treated. Sally surveys the battle.
SALLY Is this everyone? FUZZY It looks like it. SALLY Who’s watching the rest of the neighborhood? Goblins swarm them and they are sucked back into the battle. INT. ASYLUM BEDROOM - SAME CRASHING and BANGING in the darkness. Grandpa jolts out of bed and sees... several Goblins trashing his room. GRANDPA You little b-He grabs his alarm clock and HURLS it at them. dodge it, giggle and dart out the window.
Nurses run into the room and switch the LIGHT on. All over the wall, crazy rants are scrawled in marker: “The Boogey Man is Coming!” “Beware the Goblins!” etc... Open markers lie at the foot of Grandpa’s bed. GRANDPA I-- I didn’t write this! It wasn’t me!
I’m not crazy!
The nurses glare at him skeptically. GRANDPA It was those rotten goblins! They did this! (shaking a fist at the window) I’ll get you you dirty little freaks!! A concerned doctor picks up a file from the wall and writes: “Release Date: Indefinite. OUTSIDE: Watching from a tree, several goblins shake their fists back at him, laughing hysterically. EXT. KEENAN HOUSE. - SAME Christopher climbs desperately into his window and SLAMS it shut. On the street, a manhole cover lifts off the ground and several GOBLINS climb out. Looking around, they see the coast is clear and head for the houses.
INT. PHONG’S BEDROOM. - LATER Phong sleeps soundly in bed, a smile on his face. DISSOLVE... HIS DREAM. - INT. SUPERMARKET. Chubby Phong and his petite MOM walk through the ice cream aisle of the supermarket. Their cart is loaded with junk food. Phong has five candy bars open in his hands and is eating all of them. Chocolate is smeared all over his face. PHONG Can I have some Rocky Road Double Fudge Brownie Peanut Butter Delight?! MOM Of course, Phong! Whatever you want. Phong grabs a tub of ice cream from the freezer and begins gorging himself, using his hands to shovel it into his mouth. PHONG Can I have a Triple Chocolate Thunder Pecan Cookie Sandwich?! MOM (with pleasure) Of course, Phong. He grabs a frisbee sized ice cream sandwich from the freezer, rips it open and wolfs it down. BACK TO REALITY -
A goblin crawls in and puts his HANDS on Phong’s HEAD. DREAM - SUPERMARKET. Phong is spraying whipped cream into his mouth, straight from the cannister as...The lights DIM. MOM (creepy) Let’s see what’s over here, Phong. They turn the corner and the camera SPINS to reveal...the VEGETABLE AISLE. When it SPINS back, Phong looks down, shocked, and sees that he is now strapped to the cart. MOM Ooh, look, Phong...broccoli! Your favorite!
She grabs a large head of broccoli and begins forcing it into Phong’s mouth. PHONG No! Don’t ma--mmmmmph---! His mouth stretches unnaturally large as she shoves the broccoli down his throat. Phong gives muffled cries. MOM Now, Phong, don’t talk with your mouth full...Ooh, brussel sprouts! Mmmm. Phong chomps the broccoli, disgusted. Just as he swallows, she closes in with the sprouts. PHONG No! No more! Please!---mmmmph She forcefully shoves the sprouts into his mouth with an eerie delight... FOXCROFT STREET. - LATER The bears have the goblins forced back to the treeline. Finally, the goblins turn and RUN for it. The victorious bears, drained and wounded, collapse and sag to the ground. EXT. STREET. - LATER Fuzzy and Sally sprint down an empty street scanning for goblins. They pass a group of houses just as LIGHTS begin to flick on in all the upstairs bedrooms as a cacophony of CRIES begin. Down the street, several goblins with sacs full of happiness scurry into the darkness Fuzzy and Sally look at each other and shake their heads, realizing they’ve been duped. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - NIGHT Fuzzy stands in the window sill while Christopher cowers in the corner with the covers pulled over him. CHRISTOPHER Forget it. I can’t do it. FUZZY We need you.
CHRISTOPHER (terrified) I can’t. There’s so many of them...It’s horrible. FUZZY Did you think this was going to be easy? CHRISTOPHER I’m scared. FUZZY Bravery isn’t about not being afraid, Christopher. It’s about being afraid and going ahead anyway. CHRISTOPHER I’m not like my grandpa...I’m not brave, Fuzzy. FUZZY But you’ve always wanted to be...This is your chance. CHRISTOPHER I’m just not...Forget it! FUZZY Christopher-Forget it!
Christopher pulls the covers over his head. Fuzzy, dejected, turns and goes. EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT The playground is filled with limping and beaten bears. A MASH unit, equipped with needles and thread of every imaginable color, fixes the wounded bears who lie strewn about. A doctor bear sews up Archie’s ripped arm. ARCHIE Ow!...Take it easy! FUZZY You did a great job out there, Archie. I’m proud of you. ARCHIE Thanks. Just doing my job...But, Fuzzy-Is it going to be like this every night?
FUZZY I don’t know, Archie...I don’t know. INT. CLASSROOM. Phong stumbles into class late. He looks exhausted and miserable as he shuffles to his seat. MRS. WALD eyes him. MRS. WALD Glad you could join us Mr. Liu. He sits with an exhausted, distraught look on his face and slumps his head into his arms on the desk. Christopher looks around the room, worried. Half the class is slumped on their desks looking unhappy, exhausted and despondent... MRS. WALD What is wrong with you kids today? EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD - NIGHT. A pair of goblins scurry through some yards chased by four bears. When the bears catch up the goblins stop, turn and smile...Twenty goblins pop out of the bushes, SURROUNDING the bears. EXT. NEIGHBORHOOD. - NIGHT Fuzzy and the others on patrol. Down the street, other bears wave. Fuzzy waves back. CLOSE IN...Those aren’t bears at all...They’re goblins cloaked in shoddy bear costumes. They dart toward some houses. INT. MOLLY’S BEDROOM . - NIGHT Molly lies sleeping in bed with a smile. DISSOLVE... DREAM - FANCY ART GALLERY. A posh Manhattan art show filled with beautiful people and intelligentsia. Molly, wearing an ultra hip dress leads a group of sycophantic reporters and critics through her exhibit. CRITIC #1 Really, Molly, you’ve outdone yourself this time. Where do you find your inspiration?
MOLLY (with an air of self importance) I find it everywhere I go. I find life inspirational, really. Take this piece... She turns to a canvas that has notebook lines printed on it. It is a rough ten year old’s crayon drawing of a flower with a smiley face, and a crudely drawn person next to a house. MOLLY “Flower in Grandma’s Backyard.” It’s really about my grandma’s yard...and the flowers there. The followers mutter amongst themselves, impressed. CRITIC #2 Tell us about this one Molly! He gestures to another canvas that also has notebook lines on it. There is a simple crayon drawing of a tree under a large yellow sun with a smiley face in the middle. MOLLY Ahhh, “Tree and Sun.” One of my favorites. You might notice that the same tree and a similar style sun are used in the piece “Going to McDonald’s with Dad” from my last exhibit. A eureka wave of “ooohs” and “aaahs” erupts from the group. BACK TO REALITY -
A large goblin climbs onto Molly’s head. DREAM - FANCY ART GALLERY. The group stares at the picture in awe as the lights DIM. CRITIC #2 Brilliant. Truly Brilliant...Harold, what do you think of all this? He turns to HAROLD, a snooty critic in a tuxedo, tophat and MONOCLE. HAROLD Why, I think it’s horrible!...Crayon scribblings wrought by the hand of a childish amateur. Rubbish! A rumble of shock through the critics.
HAROLD It looks like these were haphazardly scrawled by a mediocre crayon wielding neophyte! Absolute rubbish! Laughter among the critics. A few nod. They all stare at the picture, but differently now. CRITIC #3 Why, you’re right! It is garbage, isn’t it?...Look at that tree...It’s terrible. Everyone laughs. Molly cringes. CRITIC #2 And why are there smiley faces in every one of these pictures? It’s so silly. MOLLY No, it’s not! Critic #1 holds up a notepad where he scrawled a quick copy of “Tree and Sun” with his pen. It looks exactly the same. CRITIC #1 Hey, look everybody. I’m an artist. Look how brilliant I am! Everyone laughs hysterically. They point at Molly and continue to laugh and make fun of her. MOLLY No! You don’t understand! They’re my pictures! Stop it! Stop it! She starts to cry as we CUT... INT. MINE SHAFT. - NIGHT The Boogie Man has set up court in a room, deep in the abandoned mine. A large elevator shaft sits in the middle of the floor. It’s PARTY TIME! Goblins revel and suck the GOLDEN HAPPINESS from their sacs with long straw-like tubules. One takes a huge swig, belches drunkenly and falls back onto his back laughing. They laugh and party and sing (incomprehensibly) and fall down, INTOXICATED on happiness and having the time of their lives. The Boogie Man sits on a makeshift throne made out of scrap metal. Balthazar and SCRAG, a dumb, mangy goblin with one eye, wait on him.
He lounges back with a satisfied smile, sipping happiness from a MARTINI GLASS. He looks different now, larger, stronger, more vital... Happier. BOOGIE MAN Ahh...The good life. He drains his glass and smiles. BOOGIE MAN Balthazar, another glass of happiness please. Balthazar takes the glass and dips it into a BARREL filled with golden fluid and hands it back to the Boogie Man. Three goblins enter the chamber, two with their sacs full, and make their way to the Boogie Man. He takes a tubule from one of their backs sucks out a taste, runs his finger along his gums and smacks his lips. BOOGIE MAN Grade A stuff. Excellent job. Now here we go...Ten percent for me. He empties THREE QUARTERS of the happiness into his barrel. BOOGIE MAN (gesturing to the emptied sac) And ninety percent for you. Enjoy. The goblin nods giddily, grabs the tubule and begins sucking the happiness out vigorously. Balthazar and Scrag drain the second goblin’s sac as the Boogie Man turns to the third goblin, who shuffles nervously. BOOGIE MAN Now Grudo, how many nights has it been since you’ve brought back any happiness? Grudo grumbles apologetically. BOOGIE MAN I understand...the bears can put up a good fight sometimes. Believe me, I know. The Boogie Man stands and gestures for Grudo to follow. BOOGIE MAN It’s tough out there. And coming back for six consecutive nights empty handed must really be hard on your self esteem, huh? Grudo nods.
BOOGIE MAN Well, Grudo don’t let that get you down. Because if you let the negativity get you down, that’s when you start to fall into a pattern of failure. What you need to do is focus and maximize the positive, because the positive is what brings success...Out with the bad and in with the good. The goblin nods, seeming to be in better spirits. BOOGIE MAN Say it with me. Out with the bad, in with the good! The goblin grumbles something that sounds a bit like “Out with the bad, in with the good.” TOGETHER Out with the bad-Suddenly, the Boogie Man gives Grudo a shove into the gaping elevator shaft. Grudo squeals in terror as he plunges into the blackness... The Boogie Man turns, nonchalantly and takes a sip from his glass. BOOGIE MAN Balthazar, get me the map. INT. MINE SHAFT. - MOMENTS LATER The Boogie Man stands in front of a large map of Hazelton. The goblins are gathered around him, listening. BOOGIE MAN My friends, you may not know it but you are on the ground floor of something huge. Sure, you’ve been getting to enjoy all of the happiness that you’ve been able to attain with my guidance...But how would you feel if I told you that you could have even more? The goblins nod and jump up and down happily. BOOGIE MAN Well you can! And you will!! He tears the map down revealing another of the County with strategic lines drawn from Hazelton to other nearby towns.
BOOGIE MAN Soon, we will spread our winning attitude and teach other goblins in other towns the secrets of success that Iâ€™ve taught you. And we will all reap the rewards! He holds up his glass of happiness and they cheer. BOOGIE MAN Each and every one of you will have your own squadron of goblins ready and willing to bring you more happiness than you could possibly imagine. And you will teach them how to do the same! And they will teach others! And soon we will control not just Hazelton...but the county! He tears the map off, revealing a map of Maine. BOOGIE MAN Then the state! He tears Pennsylvania off, revealing a map of...Honduras. BOOGIE MAN Then the-- Balthazar, why is there a map of Honduras here? Balthazar looks at Scrag who shrugs his shoulders. BOOGIE MAN Disregard this one... (he tears down Honduras revealing a map of the U.S.) Then the country! He tears down the U.S., revealing a map of the world. BOOGIE MAN And then the world!!!...including Honduras. The goblins jump up and down, cheering ecstatically. QUICK SHOTS. SCHOOL.
Mrs. Wald writes on the black board. She looks over her shoulder to the class and almost all of them are asleep on their desks, exhausted and miserable. SCHOOL YARD. - DAY Recess. No one is playing kickball today.
A lone ball rolls across the blacktop. Everywhere kids sit around looking drained, depressed, exhausted and UNHAPPY. INT. SCHOOL HALLWAY. - DAY Everywhere, exhausted children stumble around the hallways looking like miserable ZOMBIES. Christopher approaches Molly at the water fountain. looks really unhappy and sad.
CHRISTOPHER Hey...I saw you outside...Are you okay? MOLLY Yeah, I guess. I’ve been having -- I’ve had some really-CHRISTOPHER Bad dreams? MOLLY Yeah...But they’re just dreams, right? Tonight will be better. CHRISTOPHER Yeah...just a dream. She tries to smile but can’t, and slumps back to class. Christopher watches her go, his face wrought with worry. EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT Milton addresses the battered bears from the podium. MILTON I know times are hard, bears. We’re trying to work out a contingency plan that doesn’t involve the boy, but it’s difficult...You need to stay strong. I understand that the East side of town has been extremely rough, so I need some volunteers to patrol there. REGGIE Count me in. FUZZY Count me in. Other bears volunteer to go. CHRISTOPHER (O.S.) Count me in, too. The bears all turn and see Christopher. They CHEER.
MILTON (smiling) Excellent. EXT. PLAYGROUND. - LATER MR. DULLES, a very serious looking bear in a black trench coat and wire rimmed glasses with a stitched scar on his cheek, speaks from the podium with terse Mission Impossible seriousness. MR. DULLES Our intelligence indicates that the Boogie Man is recruiting and training goblins from the surrounding neighborhoods and increasing the size of his army. The attacks have become more sporadic because theyâ€™ve been striking the nearby towns of Hampton Oaks and Yorkville as well. This is a very disturbing trend, a domino effect that will only grow worse as it spreads to other neighborhoods. It is critical that we stop the Boogie Man soon, before things grow beyond our control. MILTON Thank you, Mr. Dulles. MR. DULLES My pleasure. Mr. Dulles grabs a hollow cut out of a FIRE HYDRANT from behind the podium that he lowers over himself, hurrying off into the night disguised as a fire hydrant. MILTON The Boogie Man is running his operation from the old drainage sump on the East side of town, where the old Robinson mine used to be. We need to bring Christopher there to neutralize the Boogie Man. Christopher GULPS. BEAR #3 How many goblins are there at the drainage sump now? MILTON Mr. Dulles places the number somewhere in the range of five to six hundred. A gasp through the crowd.
BEAR #4 But there’s only one hundred of us...That’s suicide! MILTON It’s the only choice we’ve got. CHRISTOPHER Are there bears in Hampton Oaks and Yorkville? All the bears turn to look at him. Yes.
CHRISTOPHER Maybe you should team up with them. ARCHIE There are bears there, but they’re not our kind of bears. The crowd of bears nod their heads in agreement. CHRISTOPHER What do you mean? DORIS Those Hampton Oaks bears are a bunch of snooty squares. They couldn’t cut the mustard with a steak knife. BUTTONS And some of those Yorkville bears tried to beat me up one time. Tried?
ARCHIE They beat the pants off you.
BUTTONS (matter of fact) Actually, I don’t wear pants. Archie shakes his head. ARCHIE (to Christopher) Those Yorkville bears are low class. Real low class. CHRISTOPHER You haven’t been able to stop the goblins on your own. Would you rather try talking to the other bears or would you rather fight six hundred goblins by yourselves?
The bears look around at one another uncertainly... EXT. YORKVILLE. - STREET A dark street lined with desolate warehouses and junk yards. Christopher, Fuzzy, Reggie, Sally, and others, stand beside a weather beaten sign that reads “Welcome to Yorkville.” Not the best part of town...A police siren whirs in the distance. They stop in front of a huge SCRAP YARD. SCRAP YARD. Acres of scrap. They make their way through, looking nervous and on edge. REGGIE I don’t know where they are...They should be right around here...Maybe they moved-WHAM! He gets whacked in the head with a HUBCAP and falls to the ground. Suddenly, hub caps start WHIZZING through the air around them as they duck for cover. From atop the nearby scrap piles we see bears in groups of three; two holding the rubber hosing that launches the caps and one loading it. The Hazelton bears hide behind the scrap as the barrage continues. Christopher curls up in fear. CHRISTOPHER Maybe this wasn’t a good idea. FUZZY (half-heartedly) It’ll be fine. A hub cap SLAMS ricocheting right near his head. his hands and signals for peace.
FUZZY Truce! Truce! We just came here to talk! YORKVILLE BEAR (Brooklyn accent) I got ya truce right here!
Talk to this!
Another cap, SMASHES right near his head. Get ‘em!
A number of mangy YORKVILLE BEARS, wielding lead pipes and chains, appear from the scrap and close in.
FUZZY Run for it! Fuzzy, a terrified Christopher and the other bears run back towards the fence, pursued by the mangy Yorkville Bears. They turn a corner, booking it and suddenly BALL BEARINGS pour out of the nearby scrap. They slip and slide and struggle to stay up as a metal PIPE swings out at their feet from a boobie trapped hinge, flattening everyone. They lie flat on their backs as the Yorkville mob turns the corner, closing in menacingly until they spot Christopher for the first time. Their eyes go wide and they dart for cover. YORKVILLE BEAR #2 (from behind some scrap) What’s with the kid?! You told a kid?! You know the rules! FUZZY The rules have changed. We need to talk. The Yorkville bears appear, surrounding them. YORKVILLE BEAR Tell us who the kid is. FUZZY This is Christopher Keenan, the grandson of Jimmy Callahan. The Yorkville Bears GASP. FUZZY He’s going to help us beat the Boogie Man. BULL, the Yorkville Bear’s leader, a tough, oversized Vin Diesel looking bear in a tank top, steps forward with a smile. BULL Why didn’t you say so? (to Christopher) How ya doin’...Sorry about the hub caps, kid. It’s a bad neighborhood, you know? Alright...We’ll talk. EXT. HAMPTON OAKS STREET. - NIGHT Archie, Bamboo, Buttons and others walk down a wide street with enormous houses set back behind lush green hedges and lawns.
They stop at a stone entrance where a sign reads, “Hampton Oaks Country Club - Members Only.” ARCHIE Hope you boys brought your membership cards. EXT. COUNTRY CLUB. - NIGHT Archie and crew approach a gazebo behind the club house where we can hear some cheesy WASP bantering and laughter. HAMPTON OAKS BEAR ...so I said to him, “Sure, that may be a proper boating shoe...for my scraping barnacles!” More laughter as Archie and Co. enter the gazebo. All heads turn to see them and the laughter abruptly stops as though they caught the help listening in. SHERMAN, a stuffy bear in a yachting outfit and captain’s hat addresses them snidely. SHERMAN Can we help you? ARCHIE Milton sent us. He wants to talk. SHERMAN Us talk with you? Why on earth would we want to do that? We much prefer the conversation of our peers...If you’d excuse us. Sherman smugly shoos them away and turns back to his conversation. ARCHIE It’s about the Boogie Man. We need to work together if we’re going to beat him. SHERMAN Maybe you need to but we’re handling him just fine...And I’m not sure how much assistance we’re going to need from an overgrown bib and bonnet wearing baby bear. Isn’t he cute fellows?...It’s a bit late, isn’t it time for your ba-ba? Run along, now, cutey-pie. The other Hampton Oaks bears snicker. ARCHIE That’s funny. You’re a funny guy. This bib, it’s pretty hilarious, huh?
Suddenly, Archie GRABS Sherman by the throat and starts CHOKING him. Hampton Oaks bears start to pull him off and the Hazelton bears come to his aid. A melee is about to ensue when a GOLF CART roars up, loaded with bears in tacky golf pants, blazers and tennis outfits. They limp into the gazebo looking beaten and wounded. The bears stop fighting. Sherman pauses, with Archieâ€™s hands at his throat. SHERMAN Chip, what happened? CHIP, a handsome bear with a sweater tied around his shoulders steps forward. CHIP It was awful, Sherman. They were everywhere. We couldnâ€™t stop them. They even got poor little Elizabeth Merriweather and she has her harpsicord recital tomorrow! It was just dreadful... Archie looks down at Sherman. ARCHIE Have it under control, huh? Well, we--
Sherman sighs. EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT The bears from Hazelton, Yorkville and Hampton Oaks are gathered in the playground, each in their own section. Milton stands atop the jungle gym addressing everyone. Bull and Sherman stand nearby. Milton points to some CRAYON DRAWN SCHEMATICS as he talks. MILTON Alright bears, the plan is this...Phase one. Capture as many goblins as possible to reduce their numbers. Phase two. Launch a full scale assault on the drainage sump and get Christopher down to the Boogie Man. BEAR #1 What are we going to do with the goblins we capture?
MILTON There is an abandoned water tower behind the Fulton Street yards in Yorkville that will make an ideal prison. An uproar from the Yorkville bears. YORKVILLE BEAR #1 Oh, sure, stick em in the ghetto! MILTON It’s not like that...It’s just secluded and large enough to-YORKVILLE BEAR #2 Well, why don’t you find someplace like that in Hampton Oaks. They’ve got plenty of room over there! SHERMAN Well, most of the land in Hampton Oaks is occupied by luxurious homes belonging to important people...It’s not ideally suited for housing those kinds of creatures in quite the way Yorkville is. BULL What’s that supposed to mean? I’m going to be housing your important butt if you say that again. SHERMAN Is that so? They look ready to go at it when Christopher stands up. CHRISTOPHER (angry) Enough! All you guys have done is bicker all night and we’re not getting anything done. The Boogie Man and the goblins are out there and they’re hurting my friends. They don’t care where we’re from and you shouldn’t either. All kids need protection. You’re bears, it’s your job. That may be the only thing you have in common but it’s enough. So quit bickering or I’m out. I didn’t come here to listen to a bunch of whining, I came here to help stop the Boogie Man. If that’s what you want to do, I’m ready...Are you? Silence as the bears look around at one another... Suddenly they all CHEER in agreement. The animosity dissolves and the different bear clans shake hands and make up.
Fuzzy looks at Christopher, impressed. Christopher shrugs. SERIES OF SHOTS. BEDROOM. A lavish bedroom where two adults sleep. A Hampton Bear sneaks in and grabs a CELL PHONE. JUNKYARD. Yorkville bears work hard hammering scrap metal and building various gadgets. Bull barks orders as Sherman and Fuzzy watch. GARAGE. Christopher looks around the garage. He spots an old FISHING NET on a pole, hanging on the wall. He takes it down and studies it. WOODS. Some bears setting tripwires and rigging something to some trees. EXT. WOODS - NIGHT. A large group of goblins creeps along. Suddenly, one trips. The camera follows a TRIP WIRE across the ground to an ALARM CLOCK that RINGS. The goblins jolt. EXT. BRICK WALL. - SAME A Hampton Bearâ€™s ears perk as he hears the alarm. He pops open a CELL PHONE and makes a call. EXT. PLAYGROUND. Fuzzy holds a cell phone that RINGS. He answers, nods, and gives a signal other bears who nod and start towards a group of BUSHES that sit nearby. When they get to them they pull open the sides to reveal that they are not bushes at all but rather camouflaged TRANSPORTS, built out of scrap and disguised as bushes. The bears pile in and TEAR OFF into the night. Fuzzy turns to Christopher, who is dressed all in black, with a HOCKEY HELMET and PADS on underneath his black sweatshirt. He is armed with the FISHING NET. You ready?
He GULPS and nods. TRAINING SEQUENCE. - SERIES OF SHOTS. - OVER SEVERAL NIGHTS GRASS. - NIGHT - Christopher wields the net as bears scramble around him. He tries to catch them but misses several times and trips over the pole, falling on his face. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT - Christopher struggles to do a pull-up.
CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - NIGHT - Christopher cracks a few raw eggs into a glass under Fuzzy’s supervision. He’s about to force himself to drink it but stops, disgusted, and looks at Fuzzy shaking his head. WOODS. - NIGHT - A battle between bears and goblins. The bears throw makeshift nets over them and wrestle them into laundry bags. Christopher, looking scared, awkwardly throws his net over a goblin, scooping him up for Archie to throw into a bag. ARCHIE Hey, you got one! Archie gives him a high five and several other bears cheer him on. Christopher smiles, humbly. WATER TOWER. - NIGHT - Bears transfer bags of captured goblins to the top of the water tower with a rope and pulley. At the top, Reggie and other bears dump the goblins into a hole at the top of the tank trapping them inside. PLAYGROUND OBSTACLE COURSE. - NIGHT - Christopher does a pull up, drops down and does a somersault, dives over a bicycle rack and sprints across a finish line where Fuzzy checks his time on a stop watch, nodding in approval. YORKVILLE YARD. - NIGHT - Another battle. Christopher confidently snatches up a goblin and tosses him into the bag by himself and moves on to the next one, sure of himself. GRASS. - NEXT NIGHT - Christopher is surrounded by bears, doing the net drill with ease, catching a bear everytime...only this time he is BLINDFOLDED. EXT. SCHOOL YARD. - DAY Christopher sits reading an oversized book on Picasso. Next to him is a stack of art books. He looks up and sees Molly coming and goes back to “reading”. MOLLY I didn’t know you liked art, Christopher. CHRISTOPHER (“startled”) Who, me?...Oh, I love art. Inside Christopher’s schoolbag, Fuzzy smiles. FUZZY (whispering to himself) Nice... INT. DAIRY QUEEN. - DAY
Christopher walks up to the counter at Dairy Queen with Molly at his side. CHRISTOPHER (confidently) Two Mister Mistys, please. He looks at Molly. They both smile. WATER TOWER. - NIGHT Christopher saunters like John Wayne with a newfound swagger, and a huge bag loaded with squirming goblins slung over his shoulder. He drops it in front of an impressed group of bears and brushes off his hands; the picture of confidence. EXT. SCHOOLYARD BENCHES. - DAY A kickball game in action. Michael Imbruce and the Goons approach Christopher on the bench. Michael studies some information on a new IPHONE. MICHAEL IMBRUCE It says here, Christopher, that you haven’t paid for Thursday, Wednesday or Tuesday. That’s six dollars...and with interest that’s... Michael looks over to a Goon next to him, who does a quick calculation on his new iPhone. GOON #1 That’s seven twenty-two... With interest. Compounded, dork. COACH (O.S.) Keenan! You’re up. CHRISTOPHER I think there’s something wrong with your calculations. Christopher takes the iPhone from Imbruce’s hands, drops it on the ground and STOMPS on it. He smiles and walks towards home plate, Imbruce staring daggers at him. Phong’s jaw drops. INT. LOCKER ROOM. - DAY Christopher changes as Phong stands next to him, desperate. PHONG Is your family moving and you didn’t tell me, Christopher?
CHRISTOPHER No, Phong. It’s okay-PHONG You’re crazy! You’re going to be in-Michael Imbruce and three Goons appear at the end of the locker aisle, cornering him. They close in. Phong darts away as fast as he can. Christopher barely pays them heed, busy putting his belt on. Imbruce holds a taped together iPhone in his hand. MICHAEL IMBRUCE (fuming) You’re in a world of hurt, Keenan, that you can’t possibly begin to comprehend. CHRISTOPHER Really? You might want to check these out first. Christopher hands Michael a few PHOTOGRAPHS. Michael snatches them away and looks. His jaw DROPS and he covers them, so that the goons can’t see. MICHAEL IMBRUCE Where did you get these? CHRISTOPHER I have my sources. MICHAEL IMBRUCE (turning to the goons) Leave us for a minute. The goons head back to the end of the aisle. Michael thumbs through the pictures, looking nauseous. CLOSE UP: The pictures show Imbruce in his basement playing with Barbie, Ken and a large Barbie Playhouse. He has a huge delighted smile on his face. One picture has a strange furry obstruction on one side of the lens. CHRISTOPHER I was just wondering; is that Barbie and Ken or is that Skipper-MICHAEL IMBRUCE It’s Skipper and K-- Shut up Keenan! These are mine now. Michael stuffs the pictures into his pocket.
CHRISTOPHER There’s a lot more where those came from. Michael swallows. MICHAEL IMBRUCE What do you want? CHRISTOPHER Today was the last day that you’ll take money from kids at this school ever again. If I hear even a peep about you or any of your goons bothering anybody ...ever, I’ll hang these pictures in every hallway and every classroom of this school and then everyone will see what you’ve really been spending their money on. Michael turns beet red. MICHAEL IMBRUCE Alright, Keenan. You’ve won this round. He turns and storms off. EXT. YARD. - NIGHT Nigel, lounges against a jungle gym reading a worn out copy of Dostoyevsky’s “Notes From the Underground.” Nigel looks up, appalled by something said by Fuzzy, who stands with a group of other bears. NIGEL Take some bags over to Yorkville? I’m afraid I can’t because I happen to be busy enjoying a delightful piece of literature right now. FUZZY We need you to do it. They’re running low over there. NIGEL I understand, however, Yorkville is not really my kind of place. If you’d like me to take a trip over to Hampton Oaks I’d be more than happy to join those chaps, but Yorkville isn’t really an appropriate place for a bear of my refinement. (to a passing Hampton Oaks bear) Isn’t that right, Chip? Chip gives him a dirty look.
CHIP Speak for yourself. (turning to Fuzzy) We’ll take the bags over to Yorkville, Fuzzy. Archie chimes in, annoyed. ARCHIE That’s not the point. He needs to do something besides take up space. NIGEL Archie, I do far more than take up space. Some bears are meant to get their hands dirty and others are not. ARCHIE And some bears are just useless. NIGEL I’m certainly not useless. FUZZY I know you were put in an attic and don’t really have an owner since your...accident... He gestures to the large wine stain on Nigel’s chest. snorts, but seems affected...
FUZZY (CONT'D) But our job is to protect all children in case you forgot. Regardless of whether we have an owner or not. NIGEL Yes, protect the little grommits. Priority number one. ARCHIE This is ridiculous. Other bears voice their agreement. Fuzzy motions for them to calm down. FUZZY Nigel, we really need you to take these bags over to Yorkville. No.
FUZZY (taking a deep breath) Then I’m going to have to ask you to not come around anymore. It’s bad for morale and it’s not fair to everyone else. NIGEL ...That’s just fine with me. FUZZY Alright then. An awkward silence as Nigel grabs his book and heads off into the night with all the bears watching him. ARCHIE No wonder they stuck you in an attic. Who would want you anyway? Nigel STOPS. Visibly hurt for a moment. bitter scowl as he walks away...
Close on Nigel’s
INT. MINE SHAFT. - NIGHT An empty martini glass glints in the torchlight below the spigot to the Happiness barrel. A few measly drops plop into it. Suddenly, the glass hurls across the room and we see the Boogie Man, angry as the glass SHATTERS against the wall. Deprived of happiness, he now looks weak and miserable. He shakes as he turns to address a cavern filled with guilty looking goblins. BOOGIE MAN This is unacceptable! I give you the tools for success and you give me nothing in return. You’re telling me that you can’t defeat the same bears that we trampled over days ago. I will not stand for any more excuses! A GOBLIN grumbles something. All the other goblins nod. BOOGIE MAN I know about the boy. Another goblin grumbles. BOOGIE MAN (defensive) And I know who’s grandson he is! Enough excuses! A NERVOUS GOBLIN steps forward and grumbles something.
BOOGIE MAN What’s this? You say you have a plan? The Nervous Goblin motions to several other goblins who step out of the cavern and come back rolling GASOLINE DRUMS in front of them. The Nervous Goblin unfurls a schematic on the floor that shows a poorly drawn map of the town and the surrounding woods and an enormous crayon drawn fire. BOOGIE MAN So, we take the gasoline...Set fire to the town and burn all of the bears...Hmmm. Interesting Drak. He kneels down and puts an arm on Drak’s shoulder. The goblins look enthusiastic. BOOGIE MAN But wouldn’t that also burn the town and the children? And then wouldn’t the happiness be gone? And wouldn’t that defeat our whole purpose? Drak and the goblins nod and deflate with each question, seeing his reasoning. BOOGIE MAN I appreciate the initiative... He grabs Drak by the ears and TOSSES HIM into the elevator shaft, screaming. BOOGIE MAN But that is the stupidest plan I have ever heard! You worthless worms are going to have to do better than this. (snatching up the schematic and tossing it down the shaft) Things are going to change around here-Balthazar comes running into the cave and grumbles something urgently. The Boogie Man’s scowl turns to a smooth grin. BOOGIE MAN (suddenly composed again) Oh, really? Well, that’s good news... EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT Christopher and the bears are gathered in the playground. Milton stands atop the jungle gym addressing them. Milton points to a crayon drawn schematic behind him.
MILTON Tomorrow night we launch our assault. As planned we sneak through this drainage pipe to here...in the sump; dead center in the heart of the Boogie Man’s stronghold. We have to strike quickly and overwhelm the goblins while Christopher sneaks down this ridge to here...where he and Fuzzy will enter the mine shaft and take the Boogie Man down...Does everyone understand? The bears CHEER. Several bears pat a nervous looking Christopher on the back. MILTON Excellent. Rendezvous here tomorrow night. And be ready. Christopher gulps. CHRISTOPHER Do you think this is going to work? FUZZY I know it will. EXT. STREET. - NIGHT Fuzzy and Christopher walk back towards the house. CHRISTOPHER I’m scared. FUZZY It’s okay to be scared. I’d be more worried about you if you weren’t. CHRISTOPHER Does he really look like a Boogie? FUZZY That’s what I hear. CHRISTOPHER Can I wear gloves? FUZZY I don’t see why not...You’re going to do fine Christopher. Look how far you’ve come. You’ve turned out to be a lot braver than you thought. CHRISTOPHER That’s because of you Fuzzy.
FUZZY I didn’t bring anything out of you that wasn’t already there, Christopher... Though I did get you those sissy pictures of Michael Imbruce. CHRISTOPHER That I couldn’t have done without you. FUZZY Obviously... They cross by an alley, sharing a laugh, when Fuzzy suddenly looks over and drops, inanimate. Two HEADLIGHTS flick on and Christopher turns to see the POLICE CAR. Officer Klumky steps out of the car and shines his flashlight on Christopher. OFFICER KLUMKY A little past your bedtime there, isn’t it son? Christopher turns pale. Officer Klumky notices that he’s still holding a Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Edition in his hand, quickly tosses it into the car, and tries to look stern. EXT. KEENAN PORCH. - NIGHT Kate stands in the doorway wearing her pajamas as Officer Klumky explains the situation. Christopher is slumped, holding Fuzzy tightly to his chest. KATE Thank you so much Officer Klumky. Christopher, go to your room. Christopher shuffles inside. Officer Klumky leans in. OFFICER KLUMKY And, uh, it looked to me like he was carrying his teddy bear next to him on a string or something and talking up a storm with it. Like they were on a romantic evening stroll or something... That’s a little weird, you know? Kate raises an eyebrow.
OFFICER KLUMKY But, I’m not really qualified in that area to say whether that’s deviant pervert behavior or not...So, uh, have a good night. He turns and quickly goes. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. Kate opens the door to Christopher’s room and finds him waiting with a look of dread. KATE (annoyed) Get to sleep. We’ll talk tomorrow. She goes. Christopher shakes his head, busted. INT. MINE SHAFT. - NIGHT The Boogie Man sits on his throne with a big grin on his face. BOOGIE MAN Clearly, you are quite different from all the others. Next to him, lounging in a luxurious chair is NIGEL. Several goblins FAN him with giant hand fans. Balthazar places a pillow behind his head. NIGEL To say the least...I was purchased in London as a gift simply for my good looks. I was never intended to be rolled around upon in the night by some smelly moppet. My early years were spent on display, adorning a shelf of Lladro porcelin and Waterford crystal. But all that ended because of a simple wine stain, inflicted upon me by a careless dolt of a child...Which leaves me with little sympathy for the brats. BOOGIE MAN Clearly these other bears had no appreciation for your glamorous beginnings. I don’t know how you endured it for so long. NIGEL Neither do I.
BOOGIE MAN And I can assure you that here your qualities will be better appreciated. In our community you’re going to receive first class treatment. Once everything proceeds as planned, and we continue our campaign across the country I will leave you to rule Hazelton...and the bears slaves, as you see fit. Brilliant.
BOOGIE MAN Now, tell me again about this assault they are planning... INT. KEENAN HOUSE. - DAY Christopher comes home and makes his way straight to his room. When he opens the door, he looks at the bed. It’s empty. He checks the side of the bed, under it, behind it. He opens the closet and starts tossing things out. CHRISTOPHER Fuzzy...Fuzzy where are you? Kate walks into the room. CHRISTOPHER Fuzzy I need to talk to you...Where did you go? KATE Christopher. I need to talk to you. He pops his head out of the closet. CHRISTOPHER Have you seen Fuzzy? KATE That’s what we need to talk about. I’ve been worried that you’ve been acting a little strange with Fuzzy lately. Talking to him and stuff...Between last night and your behavior lately, I feel that it’s time for you to move on, so while you were at school I gave Fuzzy away. CHRISTOPHER Gave him away?
KATE You’re older now and you don’t really need a teddy bear-CHRISTOPHER Who did you give him to?!! KATE To charity...Calm down. You’re a big boy now-CHRISTOPHER (panicking) You have no idea what you’ve done! KATE What have I done? CHRISTOPHER Something very, very bad!!! KATE Christopher, you’re starting to sound like your grandfather. Good!
He storms out of the room with a panicked look on his face. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - NIGHT Christopher sits in bed with his knees pulled to his chest, a look of dread on his face. A light KNOCK at the window. He reluctantly opens it to see Archie and Sally, looking worried. ARCHIE Where are you guys? Everyone’s ready to go! CHRISTOPHER I can’t do it. Fuzzy’s gone. My mother gave him to charity. Archie and Sally look shocked. Oh, no... Fuzzy...
CHRISTOPHER Tell everyone it’s off. I can’t do it without Fuzzy.
SALLY Yes, you can, Christopher. You can do it with or without Fuzzy. You have to. I can’t.
ARCHIE (putting an arm around him) You can. I promise you can. How about I go with you instead of Fuzzy? CHRISTOPHER I don’t know... SALLY Christopher, it’s up to you to save your friends from this..And who knows how many others. You need to be brave here. Fuzzy would want you to. Christopher takes a deep breath. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - MOMENTS LATER Christopher checks the authenticity of a makeshift dummy in his bed, made out of pillows, a volleyball and a black wig. He sighs; and climbs out of the bedroom window, dressed in black, holding his net. EXT. WOODS. - NIGHT The entire bear army marches alongside a fence that separates the woods from a suburban street. They are fanned out through the woods appearing and disappearing in the moonlight like a jungle patrol in Vietnam. Some carry sticks, bicycle chains, lawn darts, yo-yos; they’re ready to rumble. Christopher marches along with them looking nervous. Milton catches up with him. MILTON It’s all going to go as planned...With or without Fuzzy. I hope so.
Up ahead a bear calls out to the rest of them. REGGIE Here’s the pipe. The opening to the concrete drainage pipe is about four feet in diameter and sits alongside a creek. A small stream of water runs off into it.
The bears line up to go inside. Milton turns to Archie and Christopher. MILTON Head around to the ridge and make your way directly to the mine shaft. Weâ€™ll keep the goblins occupied. Good luck...Alright, bears. Down the pipe. Christopher and Archie disappear into the dark woods as Bull pulls himself into the pipe, slips on the quick TORRENT OF WATER and is whisked away. Reggie follows and shoots down the pipe followed by the long line of others. INT. PIPE. Reggie, Bamboo, Sally and the other bears SLIDE down the watery pipe at lightning speed. They whip around corners and gasp at the big drops, illuminated by moonlight from the occasional grate. Woohoo!!!
BULL Are we almost there yet? SALLY We should be-BOOM! Bull smashes into a steel grate at the end of the pipe. BOOM! Reggie smashes into him, then Sally, then all the other bears. EXT. PIPE. - SAME Back at the other end of the pipe, the last bear climbs in and is followed by Milton. As soon as they disappear, dozens of goblins appear from the bushes. They push a large boulder to the opening, struggling to get it inside. As soon as they lift it over the edge it takes off, rolling in deadly pursuit of the bears. INT. PIPE. - SAME At the grate, Sally, Reggie Bamboo and the others are smushed against the bars. They groan as more bears pile on top of them. SALLY Mr. Dulles said the pipe was open. This shouldnâ€™t be here!
Suddenly, dozens of goblins gather in front of the grate; growling. Nigel steps forward from among them. NIGEL It’s there because I told them to put it there. The bears’ eyes widen. EXT. MINE SHAFT. - SAME Christopher and Archie emerge into the moonlight in front of the pitch black mine shaft. Christopher gulps. ARCHIE This is it. He looks out over the sump; there’s no battle, no bears, no sign of life. ARCHIE It’s kind of quiet out there. INT. PIPE. - SAME WHAM! Milton and the last bear smack into the pile of bears trapped at the end of the pipe. He looks around, shocked. MILTON What’s going on down there? BEAR #1 (from down the pipe) It’s a trap! They tricked us! MILTON Dear god... A rumbling sound from behind him. He turns to see the boulder barrelling toward them. Ahhhh!!!
Milton grabs a hammer and a lawn dart. He desperately places them on top of one another, on the floor of the pipe. Bears see the boulder and SCREAM. Milton closes his eyes. The boulder hits the hammer/lawn dart wedge, jumps up and hits the top of the pipe; stopping dead. Milton sighs in relief.
EXT. MINE SHAFT. - SAME Archie looks out over the sump; nothing. Christopher stares into the deep dark mine shaft. ARCHIE I don’t see them...We have to keep going. Let’s do it. Archie starts into the shaft, turns and sees Christopher isn’t following. ARCHIE What’s the problem? Let’s go. CHRISTOPHER It’s...so dark. ARCHIE Of course it’s dark...It’s a cave. Come on. CHRISTOPHER It’s too dark. I...can’t. ARCHIE Christopher, this is no time to get cold feet. I think something went wrong down there so we’d better get this done while we still have the chance. Get your act together, get in here and let’s get this creep. CHRISTOPHER I’m too scared. I...can’t. ARCHIE There’s nothing to be afraid of. I’m right next to you. Heck, I’ll take him down myself. Some movement behind him in the shadows. A silhouette. Booo!!!!
Archie JOLTS and runs out of the cave and darts behind a rock. Christopher’s knees start to shake. ARCHIE There he is Christopher! Get him!... Do what your grandpa told you to do! CHRISTOPHER S...s...scare him back.
The Boogie Man’s slimy green face suddenly appears from the shadows. BOOGIE MAN Looking for me? Christopher’s and Archie’s jaws drops. Suddenly, the Boogie Man’s grin twists into a horrific rubbery mask of terror. His face stretches into a series of terrifying contortions a la “The Mask” as he lets out a ROAR. Christopher SQUEALS in horror and runs as fast as he can. Archie SQUEALS and follows him. The Boogie Man watches them go, smiling. BOOGIE MAN So much for the spawn of Jimmy Callahan... EXT. WOODS. - NIGHT Christopher and Archie stop to catch their breath at the creek where the bears entered the pipe. ARCHIE I don’t know where everyone went. Something’s very wrong. CHRISTOPHER I’m sorry. He was so...scary. ARCHIE He’s the Boogie Man! Did you think he’d be soft and cuddly? Christopher sobs as hey continue to walk. Suddenly, a dozen goblins BURST and tackle Archie to the ground. Several assault Christopher who screams and knocks them off. The goblins start to drag Archie into the woods. ARCHIE Run, Christopher, run! Christopher knocks off the last goblin and sprints towards home. EXT. DRAINAGE SUMP. - NIGHT The Boogie Man and Nigel stand by the grate, surrounded by goblins. BOOGIE MAN Well, look how cozy we are. Like one big happy family.
It’s a shame that your plan didn’t come off. I’m afraid that your “hero” ran away, squealing for his mother. It was a good plan. It might have even worked if it weren’t for your friend Nigel here... Nigel smiles humbly. ARCHIE Come a little closer and I’ll knock that smile off your face. NIGEL (to the Boogie Man) Did we give the prisoners permission to speak? BOOGIE MAN No, Nigel, I don’t believe we did. NIGEL Then maybe they need to be reminded of their place. Nigel grabs a spear and thrusts it through the bars. Archie and the other bears jump back. BULL You’re lucky these bars are here. NIGEL (mock fear) Ooooohhh. I’m so scared. The Boogie Man kneels down beside Nigel and puts an arm around him. BOOGIE MAN They seem to be very angry with you don’t they, Nigel? They must be after such a perfidious act of betrayal. Such animosity. I think you are lucky that these bars are here. I suppose.
Suddenly, four goblins atop the pipe undo the lock to the grate and open it slightly. They thrust spears inside forcing the bears to back away. The Boogie Man quickly GRABS Nigel by the ascot and drops him behind the grate. The goblins shut and lock it. Nigel gasps in shock, speechless, desperately clinging to the bars.
NIGEL nnn...nnn...no... BOOGIE MAN No one likes a backstabber, Nigel. Not even the Boogie Man...Thanks for the help though. Nigel collapses to the ground, unable to turn and look at the mob of bears gathered behind him. BOOGIE MAN We’ll deal with you bears in a bit...but now... (turning to the goblins) Bring me the happiness!!! The goblins storm off into the woods in a frenzy. BOOGIE MAN (ominously) Bring me ALL of it... PIPE. - SAME Nigel slowly turns, quivering, to see the angry mob of bears. BULL Are you scared now? NIGEL They captured me...They forced me to tell them everything...I swear...I would neverARCHIE (to the other bears) Did we give the prisoner permission to speak? SHERMAN No, I don’t believe we did. The bears close in on him, pounding their fists. EXT. WATER TOWER. - NIGHT A goblin opens the hatch at the top of the watertower/prison. Suddenly, scores of goblins BURST from the opening and scramble down the beams and the ladder, in a feeding frenzy. QUICK SERIES OF SHOTS. Goblins run through the towns at will, giving children terrible nightmares. They dart in and out of homes, their sacs filled with GOLDEN FLUID, smiles on their faces.
INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - DAY Christopher walks into his bedroom and stops. In the middle of the floor, there’s a mix of toys placed in the formation of an arrow pointing towards the toybox. He stares at it, puzzled, and then walks over to the toy box. He opens the lid of the toybox and sees a toy monkey on the top that’s holding a CD with a label that reads, “Play”. DESK. - MOMENTS LATER Christopher pushes play on his radio and we hear Mr. Dulles voice. MR. DULLES (V.O.) Christopher, this is Mr. Dulles. It appears that Nigel committed a despicable act of treason and revealed our plan to the enemy. All the bears are trapped in the pipe under heavy guard and I fear the worst for them. The situation is dire and you are the last foot soldier we have. I am aware of the Fuzzy situation so I conducted an intelligence sweep of your house. I located your mother’s financial records and came across a receipt for a donation to “Toys for Tots” on the twenty fifth. I believe that is where Fuzzy is located. They have a warehouse at Eighth and Washington in Yorkville. I would suggest you look there and try to gain his assistance...Best of luck, Christopher. Christopher takes a deep breath and looks out the window thoughtfully. SMOKE suddenly begins to hiss from the radio as the CD SELF DESTRUCTS. INT. PIPE. - NIGHT The bears lay all over each other in the pipe looking cramped, scared and miserable. SALLY Move over, will you. To where?
They all shift uncomfortably.
BUTTONS ...Maybe when he says he’ll “deal” with us, he means that we should just sit down and talk it out. Sure, we have our differences but I’m sure if we just open ourselves up we can work it out. The bears stare at him glumly. BUTTONS I mean we’re all the same on the inside. Bears...and goblins...and Boogie Men...Right? (panicking) We’re in deep trouble aren’t we? BULL I think so. Buttons runs to the grate and shakes it, freaking out. BUTTONS Let me out!! Nigel, who is lying next to the grate, bruised and tattered rolls over and looks up at him. NIGEL It’s no use. We’re doomed. BUTTONS What do you mean we’re doomed? They don’t really want to hurt us. They just want to keep us out of the way for a while, right? A group of goblins roll out two METAL DRUMS. They stop and place them directly in front of the grate. They read “GASOLINE”. Buttons’ EYES widen in terror. EXT. WAREHOUSE. - NIGHT Standing outside a darkened warehouse with a “Toys for Tots” sign in Yorkville, Christopher eyes a window, takes a deep breath and throws the rock through it. Glass shatters, falling everywhere. He pauses and looks through the window, stuck, on the edge of running away or going back. Inside, we see a large expanse of PITCH BLACK.
CHRISTOPHER (like a mantra) There’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark...There’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark... He takes a deep breath, climbs through the window and lowers himself to the floor. INT. WAREHOUSE. - SAME Pitch black. Christopher feels around. Enormous aisles of shelving, piled with crates of toys fill the vast warehouse. He keeps repeating the mantra to overcome his fear. CHRISTOPHER There’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark...There’s nothing to be afraid of in the dark... Just as he’s starting to believe it, we hear light footsteps from a nearby aisle. Christopher stops. A GROWL. His face turns pale. In an instant, Christopher grabs onto a shelf and scrambles up as two huge ROTTWEILERS charge around the corner and snap at his heels. Completely freaked out, he looks around for somewhere to go. He’s trapped. The dogs bark and salivate below. CHRISTOPHER Fuzzy!!! Fuzzy, help!!! Are you in here?! Nothing but the sound of the dogs’ vicious BARKING as we... CUT TO: EXT. DRAINAGE SUMP. - SAME The Boogie Man stands between the two gasoline barrels, sipping happiness from his glass. Goblins surround him. BOOGIE MAN How does it feel to be trapped inside of that...cold...dark...wet...prison? Not very pleasant is it? (blowing up, his face contorts) Try it for seventy years!!! Victory is sweetest when you’ve known defeat. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve envisioned this moment. You were foolish to have hinged your hopes on that gutless little boy. You were just lucky the first time.
MILTON We’re not alone. There’s a lot more bears out there. BOOGIE MAN And we’ll deal with them one bear and one town at a time. My army will spread. Our numbers will grow. And with each new town it will be easier. They have no idea what’s coming for them...But don’t worry. We’ll take good care of your children when you’re gone. MILTON You’re disgusting. BOOGIE MAN I know...I’m the Boogie Man...And I’m going to enjoy watching you burn. He gestures to some of the goblins. BOOGIE MAN Prepare the gas. NIGEL You never said anything about burning anyone. BOOGIE MAN You never asked. Goblins scramble to move the tanks toward the pipe grinning at the petrified bears. INT. WAREHOUSE. - NIGHT Christopher sits precariously on the top shelf watching as the dogs snap below. FUZZY!!!
Nothing. Christopher looks around. Above him a SPRINKLER PIPE runs the length of the ceiling, and across the room. POV: Beyond the aisles are a set of swinging, double doors. He grabs the pipe and gives it a tug. It seems sturdy. With a frightened look at the dogs below, he swings his feet up and starts to shimmy across the room, thirty feet above the ground.
The dogs bark and follow him as he crosses the first aisle. And the second...His face is red with exertion as he shimmies along. Suddenly, over the last aisle, a brace holding the pipe buckles and POPS out of the ceiling. The dogs BARK louder, smelling blood. Christopher scrambles to situate himself over the last shelf...Just as the braces POP and the pipe BREAKS. Christopher drops onto the shelf, which COLLAPSES. Sending Christopher to the FLOOR in an avalanche of toys and SPRAYING WATER. Christopher scrambles back up a shelf as one of the dogs darts after him. Terrified, Christopher grabs some toys and THROWS them at the oncoming dog. A red BALL bounces off the dog’s head... The dog STOPS and watches the ball roll down the aisle. Suddenly, both dogs take off after the ball. One grabs it and they come back. Desperate, Christopher looks around the shelf and finds another ball which he throws; further away this time. The dogs scramble after it. As soon as they run, he jumps to the floor and SPRINTS for the door. SLOW MOTION: The dogs snatch up the ball and turn to see Christopher. His legs pump, full speed as water sprays everywhere. The dogs sprint after him, closing in... Closer...The dogs are about to reach him when BAM! Christopher BURSTS through the doors and shuts them as the two dogs SLAM into them. LOADING DOCK. Christopher LOCKS the doors and darts past some shipping containers. Suddenly, he stops and tilts an ear towards a neaby container...Voices. He walks towards the container and hears faint voices inside. Some papers are stuck to the side. One reads, “Bears”. Christopher smiles. He goes to the side of the container and unlatches it, pulling open the door. Inside are HUNDREDS OF TEDDY BEARS, piled on top of one another, inanimate. Christopher studies them.
CHRISTOPHER Alright, cut the act, I know you guys are alive...I’m looking for a bear named Mr. Fuzzy Wuzzy Face. He came here yesterday and-Fuzzy’s head pops up from the pile. FUZZY Christopher! How did you get in here? Instantly, the pile of bears comes to life. They squirm and move everywhere. BEAR #1 Who is this kid? FUZZY I know him. It’s okay. He knows?
BEAR #3 Let me out of here. I haven’t been able to move for days. The cooped up bears scramble to get out of the container and stretch their legs. Fuzzy runs to Christopher. FUZZY Am I glad to see you... CHRISTOPHER I never thought I’d see you again. They HUG. CHRISTOPHER (distraught) Fuzzy, it’s terrible. It’s all my fault. All the bears are caught and the Boogie Man is going to do something awful to them and I saw him and completely chickened out and ran away and if I wasn’t a chicken, none of this would have happened-FUZZY (putting a consoling arm around him) Whoa, whoa, whoa...Tell me exactly what happened.
EXT. DRAINAGE SUMP. - NIGHT The bears are drenched and terrified as the second barrel of gasoline is poured through a grate above them and runs down the pipe, dousing them. The bears cough from the fumes. BOOGIE MAN Pardon the smell...I have gas. He and the goblins all share a laugh. BOOGIE MAN Well, enough dilly-dallying around. I’d say that it’s been a pleasure but it hasn’t... (to the goblins) Everybody have their marshmallows? The goblins hold up sticks with MARSHMALLOWS on them and gather towards the pipe. BOOGIE MAN Since you’re made of fur I think it should be over quickly...Balthazar, the matches, please! Balthazar looks around and shifts nervously. He grunts something to a Scrag, who grumbles nervously back. BOOGIE MAN Balthazar! The matches! Balthazar looks at him and shrugs, coyly. BOOGIE MAN Please tell me you have the matches. I asked you to bring them. Balthazar grumbles. BOOGIE MAN (annoyed) You were supposed to bring them! They’re near my toiletries...Underneath my journal. Balthazar and Scrag nod knowingly and head back towards the mine shaft. BOOGIE MAN (as an afterthought) And don’t read my journal! Balthazar grumbles back.
BOOGIE MAN (turning to the bears) Please, forgive the delay...Don’t get all hot and bothered. He chuckles to himself and looks to the goblins who don’t think it’s funny. BOOGIE MAN They’ll be back in a flash... He laughs even more. The goblins don’t respond. BOOGIE MAN (to the goblins) Flash. Get it? When I light the match there will be a flash and they’ll all be hot and bothered...Get it? (annoyed) Oh, just hold on. INT. LOADING DOCK. - NIGHT Christopher is still slumped against the container, finishing his story. Fuzzy listens sympathetically. Nearby, other bears listen in to the conversation, enthralled. CHRISTOPHER ...And the bears are trapped in a pipe and it’s all my fault because I’m such a chicken. I’m sorry Fuzzy. I’m sorry. FUZZY It’s okay, Christopher. SCRUFFY, a nearby bear who’s been listening, chimes in. SCRUFFY You’re no chicken. Look at what you did with those dogs, kid. I mean when they first moved us in here we were all in boxes and we could have run for it but we didn’t even think about it with those two man eaters out there. A loud BANG against the doors. BEAR #2 (eyeing the doors nervously) No way...I don’t know how you did it. CHRISTOPHER I needed to find Fuzzy. FUZZY And you did that without me.
CHRISTOPHER Yeah, I guess I did. FUZZY All the courage that you have, Christopher, it doesn’t come from me...It comes from you. Christopher looks back at the doors where the dogs BARK loudly. CHRISTOPHER I guess so. Scruffy steps forward. SCRUFFY (loud, to everyone) Listen, I know all of us are from different places but this Boogie Man sounds dangerous to everyone. There’s a few hundred of us in this container and it sounds like that might just be enough to give this plan of theirs another shot. What does everyone say? A murmur through the bears. They think, discuss and begin to voice their approval. Scruffy looks at Fuzzy. FUZZY (to Christopher) What do you say? Christopher surveys all the bears gathering around him and looks squarely at Fuzzy. CHRISTOPHER I say let’s do it. INT. MINE SHAFT. - NIGHT Balthazar and Scrag stand beside the Boogie Man’s throne, intently reading a frilly blue diary with “My Journal” embroidered on the cover. They laugh hysterically. EXT. DRAINAGE SUMP. The Boogie Man and the goblins stand around waiting. BOOGIE MAN ...It’s called pun. Flash. Like when I light them on fire. (bitter)
It requires an understanding of the subtleties of language, layers of meaning, a well developed intellect. Something that you goblins don’t possess...What is taking them so long?! He turns towards the mine shaft and sees Balthazar and Scrag scurrying towards him. BOOGIE MAN It took you long enough. Give me the matches! They hand them over. Inside the pipe, the bears cringe. BOOGIE MAN You didn’t read it did you? They both shake their heads. Scrag begins to GIGGLE. Balthazar steps on his foot. The Boogie Man eyes them suspiciously, then takes the matches and smiles. BOOGIE MAN At last, the moment of truth. The Boogie Man STRIKES a match and steps towards the pipe. The bears scream and plead, terrified. Suddenly, a large STONE glides across the ground towards the Boogie Man. It pops up, and Mr. Dulles bursts from his disguise and in a last desperate attempt, jumps and swats the match from the Boogie Man’s hand. The Boogie Man grabs Mr. Dulles and holds him at arms length. MR. DULLES No! You can’t do this! The Boogie Man smiles as Mr. Dulles swings in futility. BOOGIE MAN Isn’t this cute? What a loyal little bear you are coming to save your friends all alone...Very brave, but what do you think you’re going to accomplish here all by yourself? Mr. Dulles stops swinging. His eyes go wide as he looks beyond the Boogie Man and smiles. Nothing.
Puzzled, the Boogie Man turns... ...And sees hundreds of bears, STORMING down the sides of the drainage sump, making a beeline for him and his army. They give a terrifying BATTLE CRY. Oh dear.
He drops Mr. Dulles and runs. BATTLE. Goblins begin to scramble desperately, shocked and scared as the bears descend upon them. An enormous battle of epic proportions begins. Bears and goblins fight furiously, everywhere. Christopher and Fuzzy bring up the rear and survey the battlefield. FUZZY (pointing) There... They see the green form of the Boogie Man disappear into the mine shaft. BATTLE. A contingent of bears breaks through the goblins. One tackles a large goblin with a ring of keys around his neck and tosses them to Scruffy. He unlocks the grate and lets it drop open. The prisoner bears CHEER. ARCHIE Thanks...Um, who are you guys? SCRUFFY The cavalry...Glad to be of service. Scruffy steps back and politely gestures for them to exit. ARCHIE (turning to everyone) Itâ€™s payback time. The bears give a WAR CRY and pour out of the pipe, ready to take on the world. EXT. MINE SHAFT. - NIGHT Christopher and Fuzzy stand in front of the darkened mine shaft, in the exact spot where he stood last time.
Fuzzy, who’s carrying a length of rope, starts to go inside. Christopher doesn’t move. FUZZY Just get the net over him, take him down and I’ll tie him up...You can do this, Christopher. CHRISTOPHER I don’t know, Fuzzy. He’s scary. FUZZY Then why is he the one hiding? Scare him back. Christopher lets it sink in...He clenches his fishing net tightly. Alright.
He steps towards the cave. MINE SHAFT. Deep in the shaft there’s a light ahead. They emerge into the large torchlit elevator shaft and see the Boogie Man sitting on his throne, waiting for them. They step into the light. Christopher wielding his net. Fuzzy the rope. BOOGIE MAN Ah, good to see you again...Very persistent. An admirable quality but it’s not going to be enough. He stands and approaches Christopher. His face begins to distort and grow as his tone turns more sinister. Christopher takes a step back towards the wall. Fuzzy stands his ground. BOOGIE MAN No one is going to stop me this time... The Boogie Man’s face suddenly erupts into a terrifying contortion, tongue wagging, eyes bulging grotesquely. He ROARS. Christopher cringes in terror. The Boogie Man stops and laughs.
BOOGIE MAN What’s the matter? Did I...scare you? I haven’t even gotten started. Another even scarier face erupts with an even louder ROAR. He reaches out towards Christopher, who’s shaking against the wall. Fuzzy steps to his defense and charges the Boogie Man, kicking him in the knee. The Boogie Man’s leg buckles a bit and he looks down at Fuzzy, amused. BOOGIE MAN I’d appreciate it if you didn’t interrupt me! He reaches down, grabs Fuzzy by the head and tosses him into the elevator shaft, where he disappears. CHRISTOPHER Fuzzy! No!!! The Boogie Man turns back to Christopher. BOOGIE MAN Oh, don’t worry, you’ll be joining him soon enough. ELEVATOR SHAFT. Fuzzy falls into the shaft clutching the rope. With a twist, he manages to snag it around the nub of an old beam that juts from the wall, ten feet from the top. He hangs onto the rope with both hands, looking desperately towards the opening. THRONE ROOM. Christopher is backed against the wall, tears in his eyes, as the Boogie Man closes in, ROARING with a terrifying face. Christopher looks to the elevator shaft. CHRISTOPHER (distraught) Fuzzy!!! Then suddenly, almost involuntarily, he gives the Boogie Man a SHOVE with the net pole. CHRISTOPHER (enraged) Stop!!!
The Boogie Man lurches back. His scary face recedes as he studies Christopher curiously for a second, then ROARS and launches into another scary face. Christopher steps forward and gives him another shove. The Boogie Man stumbles back, a look of worry crosses his face. CHRISTOPHER Enough!! You’re not going to do this anymore. Another ROAR and a scary face. Christopher steps up and gives an even HARDER SHOVE. CHRISTOPHER You’re not going to hurt any more of my friends. You’re not going to hurt any more bears. And you’re not going to steal any more happiness! Another shove. The Boogie Man’s face falters. For a moment, he looks, weaker, smaller...scared. BOOGIE MAN You have no idea who you’re dealing with! He launches into the hugest scary face of all. CHRISTOPHER Yeah, I do. A...mean...ugly...boogiefaced...bully! He gives the Boogie Man a huge shove that sends him flying onto his back. CHRISTOPHER Get up!!! Come on jerk!! The Boogie Man lies on the ground, holding his back like it went out, then struggles to his feet. CHRISTOPHER Who’s the chicken now?! You’re finished! No more happiness. No more nightmares. It’s over! The Boogie Man backs away, holding his back, and trying not to look scared but he looks sickly and weak now. BOOGIE MAN (desperate) Back off! Or-Christopher kicks him in the stomach and whacks him in the head with the pole, sending him crumpling against the wall.
CHRISTOPHER Or nothing. BOOGIE MAN (like a sissy) Stop! Please! No more... CHRISTOPHER (like the Boogie Man earlier) What’s the matter? Did I...scare you? The Boogie Man struggles to stand. BOOGIE MAN (not believing it himself) No...I-- Beware, boy...You have no idea who you’re messing with. Christopher smiles. CHRISTOPHER Neither do you. He throws the net over the head of the Boogie Man, who SQUEALS and flounders. With all of his strength, Christopher swings the Boogie Man around in the net towards the center of the room... And DOWN THE GAPING ELEVATOR SHAFT. He gives a horrifed scream as he falls to his demise... BOOGIE MAN Nooooo!!!!!! ...Right past Fuzzy, who hangs against the wall. Christopher sees Fuzzy and his eyes light up. Fuzzy!
FUZZY You did it!...I knew you could! CHRISTOPHER Are you okay? FUZZY (smiling) Sure...Just hanging out. CHRISTOPHER I see that.
Christopher smiles and holds the net down for him to jump into. BATTLE. Out in the sump, the bears are routing the goblins who begin to flee in large numbers. Bamboo does the “crane kick” from The Karate Kid, taking out a goblin. Sherman and Bull stand back to back dishing out the goblin whoopings. Doris and Sally beat up several goblins together. Doris looks at Sally and with dainty precision stops to straighten the bow on Sally’s head. Thanks.
DORIS No problem, Sugar... They smile and then charge some more goblins. DRAINAGE SUMP. OPPOSITE SIDE. Buttons knocks a goblin down with a cross check from a stick. Archie grabs the goblin by the ankles and gives him a midget toss into the bushes. They systematically do it to another and Archie stops, wipes his brow and gives Buttons a high five. They turn and survey the battlefield. The last goblins flee for the woods. ARCHIE (victoriously) Monsters aren’t the only thing that go bump in the night. Across the way, Christopher and Fuzzy emerge from the mine shaft, victorious. CHRISTOPHER The Boogie Man is finished!!! The bears simultaneously launch into a CHEER. EXT. DRAINAGE SUMP. - LATER The bears DANCE and CELEBRATE, elated with their victory. There’s not a goblin in sight.
INT. THRONE ROOM. - SAME Nigel sits against the wall of the Boogie Man’s former throne room. His hands are tied and he stares coldly at Fuzzy, Archie and Milton. NIGEL Greatness is always undone by mediocrity. The other bears all look at one another, seriously. ARCHIE ...And you’re a pee-pee face. Fuzzy tries not to laugh as Archie chuckles. MILTON For your crimes of treason against bears and children everywhere we hearby sentence you to imprisonment inside this shaft...for life. NIGEL Good riddance. MILTON Goodbye, Nigel. The bears turn and head back down the shaft. NIGEL I’m not a pee-pee face. ARCHIE Goodbye, pee-pee face. The bears snicker. EXT. MINE SHAFT. - NIGHT Fuzzy, Milton and Archie emerge from the shaft, passing four of the large GAS TANKS. Outside everyone is dancing and making merry, including Christopher. Milton turns to Reggie. Blow it.
The three of them join the party as Reggie ignites a match, touching it to a line of gas leading to the tanks. LONG SHOT: The party raging as the line of gas shoots into the mine which explodes in a dazzling display of blue and red flame, causing the entrance to completely COLLAPSE.
INT. MINE SHAFT. - SAME Dust and smoke blows in on Nigel who sits on the throne in the darkened shaft... completely alone. He looks around as TEAR forms in his eye. EXT. MINE SHAFT. - SAME The bears all CHEER as CONGA MUSIC kicks in: SOUND BRIDGE: EXT. PLAYGROUND. - NIGHT Mambo MUSIC plays from a Fisher Price radio as the party continues. A Mambo line circles around the jungle gym as others dance and make merry. A) Reggie and Tank bust out some break dancing moves. Reggie launches into a big windmill. Tank spins on his helmet. B) Buttons leans against a beam, chatting it up with a hot Hampton Oaks girl bear. BUTTONS Well, after I took all ten goblins out by myself I really wasn’t sure if I had anything left in me. But then, another twenty came from out of nowhere and I had to take them on as well. Archie, who’s passing by, overhears the conversation. ARCHIE Is that right? BUTTONS (nervous) Oh, hey Archie, um-ARCHIE I thought it was at least thirty or forty. BUTTONS (surprised) Well... ARCHIE (to the girl) He’s just being humble.
BUTTONS Well, I don’t want to brag or anything but I think there were at least seventyfive... Archie winks and joins the Mambo line. C) Fuzzy dances with Sally. She smiles as he spins her. He turns and winks at Christopher, who sits on the jungle gym, nodding his head and sipping a soda. A makeshift wreath of laurels hang around his neck. Fuzzy climbs up and sits down next to him. FUZZY What’s the matter? You don’t Mambo? CHRISTOPHER I’m kind of tired. I haven’t been getting much sleep lately. They share a smile. FUZZY Your friends would be proud if they knew. CHRISTOPHER I’ll never tell anybody...except Grandpa, of course. FUZZY I know you won’t... But you’ll always know you did it. That’s all that matters. CHRISTOPHER (confidently) I did it... So we’ll have an easier time with the goblins now? FUZZY Well, they will. (gesturing to the other bears) Your work is done...And I’m not going to be here anymore, Christopher. Christopher looks at him, shocked. CHRISTOPHER What do you mean? You’re...leaving. FUZZY You don’t really need me anymore...I’m going back to Toys for Tots to be redeployed to another child who does.
CHRISTOPHER But I do need you...Who’s going to protect me? FUZZY (smiling) After what you did, no goblins are going to come anywhere near your house ever again... Across the way, Scruffy gives a wave to Fuzzy. A group of the Toys for Tots bears are gathering, getting ready to leave. Fuzzy nods, knowingly. FUZZY It’s part of growing up...It’s just easier for other kids, because they never really know... (getting choked up) ...how much the bears care about them too. Christopher fights tears. Don’t go.
FUZZY I have to...It’s time. There’s another child out there who needs my help...But I’ll never forget you. I promise. CHRISTOPHER I won’t forget you either. They hug. Fuzzy hops down onto the gravel and makes his way towards Scruffy and the Toys for Tots bears. A tear streams down Christopher’s face. The Toys for Tots bears begin their march back to the warehouse. Fuzzy turns back to Christopher and gives one last sad wave and disappears into the woods. INT. KATE’S BEDROOM. - NIGHT Christopher quietly enters Kate’s room. Mom... She stirs.
KATE What is it honey? CHRISTOPHER I’m sorry I yelled at you today. KATE (touched) It’s okay... They hug. INT. CHRISTOPHER’S BEDROOM. - NIGHT Christopher climbs into bed when Kate opens the door. KATE Grandpa called. It looks like he’s getting out next week. CHRISTOPHER Really? How? KATE It sounds like he hit it off with one of the nurses. Christopher grimaces, puzzled. KATE I’m sorry I didn’t tell you about giving Fuzzy away. CHRISTOPHER It’s okay... I understand. But I’ll miss him.
It was time.
KATE (sympathetically) I know... And I’m sure he’ll miss you too. Sweet dreams, honey. As Kate closes the door, she notices Christopher reaching over to the glowing NIGHTLIGHT. She stops and smiles proudly as he FLIPS THE SWITCH to off and the room DARKENS as we... CUT TO CREDITS. DREAM MONTAGE OVER CREDITS. INT. PHONG’S BEDROOM - NIGHT Phong sleeps in his bed, smiling.
INT. RESTAURANT - DREAM Phong, dressed in a tuxedo, sits at a table in a fine restaurant filled with ice cream and cakes, stuffing his face with DESSERTS. A WAITER approaches. WAITER I hope your dinner was satisfactory. Are you ready for dessert, sir? Phong looks up from the table already full of sweets and nods happily. INT. MOLLY’S BEDROOM - NIGHT Molly sleeps peacefully in bed. INT. GUGGENHEIM MUSEUM - DREAM Molly stands atop a ladder holding a big bucket of play-doh. She ads a last dollop to a giant play-doh statue of a brown dog. Three sycophantic ASSISTANTS dressed in black turtle-necks mill about below her. One is on a cell phone. ASSISTANT #1 Molly...I mean, genius...It’s Zac Efron. He says he wants to buy three of these! MOLLY Tell Zac there’s only one. just tripled.
And the price
ASSISTANT #1 He’ll take it! But only if he gets to take you out to dinner tonight! MOLLY (annoyed) Not tonight... ASSISTANT #1 Yes, of course, I forgot. Joe Jonas is taking you to the Ice Capades... INT. GIANT BARBIE DREAMHOUSE - DREAM A smiling Ken-Doll version of a shirtless Michael Imbruce sits next to a PLASTIC BARBIE by the pool sipping drinks. Michael has large PLASTIC MUSCLES and perfect PLASTIC HAIR. A plastic SKIPPER comes down a slide into the water.
INT. ASYLUM BEDROOM - NIGHT Mona romantically spoon feeds Jello to Grandpa and tickles him. MONA Eat up, snookums. One more week and you can take me to a romantic dinner. GRANDPA Of course, my little buttercup. He swallows the jello and fakes a smile. Mona starts to hug and kiss him as grandpa GRIMACES. GRANDPA One more week... FADE TO BLACK.
Published on May 17, 2013