Jordan Holoboski Dialog – A Secret Central Act
In the woods, I sat down with my Airsoft rifle at my shoulder, looking through the scope at my target, when my BBs began to talk to me. “I’m not going to hit him.” The first BB stated. “What?” I asked. “That tango you’re aiming at, I won’t hit him.” “Why not? “Your hopup is too high.” “My what?” “Hopup, it makes us spin and fly farther, but can lower our accuracy.” “It’s fine, watch.” I take a shot at my target. The BB flies off into the distance, screaming “Wheee!” like a little schoolgirl. However, he curves off to the left and smacks right into a tree.” “Get down! Get down! He is going to see you!” The second BB yelled. “Alright! Alright!” “He told you he wasn’t going to hit him.” “Well I didn’t think hopup mattered much.” “Hopup doesn’t matter? Boy, let me teach you a lesson. Look down the scope, just keep looking. Don’t take your eyes off it. See that cup in the distance? Look right at it. Good, now fire me.” I pulled the trigger, the BB flies but this time hits a tree to the left of the cup, but relatively close to where I was shooting from. The BB ricocheted off and hit me right in the left cheek, leaving a small bruise. The second BB is now beside me, trying not to laugh. “Ow ow ow! Why the hell did you do that?” I screamed, furiously. “If your hopup was off that wouldn’t have happened, idiot. Now see that dial on the left side of your gun.” “Yes…” “Spin it down until it clicks and you cannot spin it anymore.” “Got it.” “Put me back into the clip, and we’ll do it right this time.” I put him back into the clip, and begin to aim at the cup. “Whoa whoa whoa, what are you doing?” He asks. “Aiming at the cup?” “Aim at your original target; I’m surprised he hasn’t heard you yet with all of your yapping.” “Have it your way.” I look down through the scope yet again, and fire. It’s only a second or two before I hear a loud scream from my target, exclaiming that he has been hit. “Tango down, game over.” I whisper, at last.
Notes: One thing that almost no one knows about me (or would expect from me) is that I play Airsoft. It is merely a game where you shoot at your friends with little plastic BBs coming out of very realistic looking gun in order to carry out very specific objectives, aka a “pretend war.” My friends and I play this about once a month, if the weather permits, and it has really become an enjoyable part of my life. By playing these games every month, I’ve grown quite attached to Airsoft and Airsoft guns (I currently have four in my possession). On the contrary, I have no interest in owning a real gun at absolutely any point in the future. With that, I also never want to go into combat in a real war. Could you imagine me in a real war? I’d be a complete mess; I probably wouldn’t even be able to hold a gun. This is just a game, merely a game to play time with my friends. With that being said, this piece is just shows me in a typical game of Airsoft. While we usually play a game called Capture The Flag (CTF), in this piece we were playing a game known as Last Man Standing (LMS). Basically, the idea is to get everyone out with a hit from a BB. To my dismay, during these games my accuracy suddenly falls. It’s usually because I have hopup on a certain way that’s wrong. This moment just denotes my confusion with it, and while it does seem the problem is resolved at the end, realistically I still have no idea how hopup works. Nevertheless, Airsoft plays a weird role in my life. It’s is practically a secret part of me. If most people knew they would probably be in disbelief, it’s really contradictory to my character. I guess I can admit that the whole idea of guns is appealing to most men, yet with me having dreams of being a neurologist and wanting to have nothing to do with a real war, it doesn’t really make too much sense.