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111 ISSUE 17 WEEK 9

Bond University's Weekly Student Publication



F@&k Yea!

CONTENTS Editor’s Report It’s Week 9. I’ve run out of things to say. I would end it there if I were irresponsible. So, I’m going to point out what we have in store for you this week. First up is yet another comedy gold from our very own Milly Arsic. Milly’s article takes you on a rather alternative tour of Bondies’ favourite study spots. Remember ‘The Top Five Dictators of All Time?’ Mona Mizikovsky is back with another satirical look at politicians. Entitled ‘World Leaders Caught With Their Pants Down’, Mona shows us that with politicians, there’s no use having big egos if you’re not going to put it to good use. On a more sombre note, I, on behalf of the Scope team, would like to express my deepest condolensces to the victims and all those affected in any way by the Japanese tsunamis. With a plethora of natural disasters in recent times, it is important for us to help out those in need in any shape or form. At the very least, do not take comfort for granted. I would also like to take this opportunity to express my sympathy towards vegans. Please do not forget to take your iron and vitamin supplements. Until next week,

Andra Nasrie

Weekly Busa Report


Location, Location, Location




Bond’s Greatest Athlete


The Flood Appeal


Express Yourself!


World Leaders Caught With Their Pants Down






Scope Sport


Jorja.Wallace .................Sub Editor Milly.Arsic................. Sub Editor

Mona.Mizikovsky ................. Sub Editor Peter.Clayton ................. Sub Editor

Shannan.Smith ................. Sub Editor

Jen.Phan ........... Photographer

Kat.Kaliviotis ...........Photographer

Sultan.AlSaheal ..........Photographer Mitch. Hammer..........Photographer Zee.Tarona ..........Photographer


Jacqui.Ward ..................Designer email us at: Cover photo by Ash Adams

Weekly BUSA Report

Education Pod Update

Henry Norris

Black & White – this Friday!

Amid the tsunami and nuclear meltdown in Japan, bloodshed and unrest in Libya, and the Gold Coast Titan’s shattering first game loss in the NRL, the Education arm of BUSA has enjoyed a period of relative peace and stability, and is aligning itself more closely with Charlie Sheen than Muammar Gadaffi. We may still have our jobs, and we haven’t become a YouTube phenomenon, but that’s not to say we don’t have one speed, one gear - go!

The Postgraduate Student Association (PGSA) has been busy organising the semesterly ‘Black & White Cocktail Affair’, a classy off-campus event held for postgraduate and higher degree and research students here at Bond. The event is being held this Friday night at the incredible Q1 Skypoint Observation Deck and tickets are still available from the BUSA Office!

But like Sheen, we may have become a bit mentally unsound as a result of our long Monday night meetings, countless hours spent in the office distributing diaries and selling tickets, and of course, our Thursday night antics. So, to try and put it as clearly and soundly as possible, here is an update of what the Education team has been working on this semester.

LifeOne LifeOne has been introduced this semester as an interactive program to help students get the most out of their studies at Bond. It provides advice and inspiration to students to help strike the right study-life balance, make the right life decisions, and generally gain greater motivation to achieve goals and work towards your dreams. Starting in Week 3, there have been a number of sessions run on-campus so far, covering topics such as life ambitions, body and balance, and knowing your mind. If you’d like to take part in these sessions, don’t hesitate to contact our Special Interests Director, Jordie Pollock.

Alumni Student Excellence Medals We’ve introduced the Alumni Student Excellence Medals into the student experience at Bond. There are three Medals to be won, including Opinionated Essay, Creative Arts, and Public Speaking. These will each be separate constitutes and be held in the January, May and September semesters respectively. Each Medal has a jaw-dropping $1,000 cash prize for 1st place, with 2nd and 3rd places raking in $300 and $200.

Legal Referral Service BUSA has reinstituted its Legal Referral Service with participating Gold Coast law firms. This service means that BUSA may refer Bond students to local law firms for free initial consultations should you be facing any legal problems with rental, criminal, or other matters. If you feel you could benefit from this program, drop into the BUSA office and chat to our Advocacy Director, Lucy Hopkinson.

The Opinionated Essay Medal closes today (at 11.59pm), and I’ve received a wide selection of interesting and thought-provoking essays. Thank you for those who have entered the competition. I look forward to announcing the winners later in the semester. The judging panel will consist of the Vice-Chancellor Robert Stable, BUSA President James Graham, and esteemed alumnus Steven Ciobo MP.


Location, Location, Location Milly Arsic

Fellow Bondies, roll up, roll up for the biggest auction you’ll attend this year! Be ready to push, shove and squeeze your way through as your favourite study spots are put on the line. Be quick to land yourself one of these sizzling deals before rival nerds get in first.

Multimedia Learning Centre (MLC; Malaca) Cost: Being distracted by students in the private room playing video games, taking half their shirts off and shouting “FIFA!” If you’re searching for a central destination, suave creation and good ol’ procrastination, look no further than the MLC. Easy on the eye, the centre is unrivalled with its ever-changing light display and photographic appeal. Especially interesting are the depictions of horses on fire, which gets one hoping Photoshop really can prevent cruelty to animals. Features include air-conditioning and the feeling of everyone’s eyes on you as you enter, as they check whether their study date has stood them up (again). Part gallery, part chill-house, part study hub, the MLC is good for a little you-time + study-time + socialising-time. Its high ceilings and spacious interior will help you feel relaxed when the stress hormones hit an all-time high. Don’t miss out on this bad boy!

Library (The Library) Cost: Food, study, food, study…food? If you like your food and study to go, then the Library is the place for you. This place is perfect for satisfying those coffee and salad wrap cravings. With three luxurious levels all adorned with books, couches and computers, what’s not to love? The higher up you go, the quieter it gets. Newly renovated, this is the first-year’s ultimate getaway. However, don’t let the click-clickclicking of desperate students trying to submit their assignments on time deter you. This place is like a work factory – all that printing and stapling and photocopying does wonders in maximising efficiency. But look on the bright side. It has its own Blockbuster room, hardcopies of the latest papers and private meeting rooms. Buy now before it’s too late! 4

Law Library (Lawbry) Cost: Putting up with that one noisy crew getting glares from everyone else…you know who you are. Here, the smell of prestige looms in the air. Those musty law reports practically compel you to study. It’s almost as if the portrait of Lord Denning himself is watching you, making sure you stay on track with your work. Despite one dodgy printer, the “Lawbrary” as it is popularly known, is a must for any Law student determined to become a hotshot lawyer. Through its labyrinth of legalese, prospective buyers will learn to appreciate its hardcore thirst for knowledge through the shelves of so many law reports. Features include lockers, historical displays and extravagant furnishings. You’ll be hitting your head on your textbook if you let this pass you by!

Bat Labs (The Batties) Cost: Sacrificing your sanity because finding a spare computer is like finding a spare car park at Bond. That, and getting kicked out of a room because a class is about to start (with 20 spare computers remaining). Perfect for creatures of the night and insomniacs, the Bat Labs are secluded, seductive and sun-dried. Hidden beneath the depths of campus, the lab caters for the die-hard study fans with two hour deadlines to go. With no phone coverage, minimal distractions can follow suit. Just watch out for selfish people who finish printing on an Express computer then go on Facebook (evil glares mean nothing to them). Now’s the time to rush in; this is the ultimate spot if you want to secure a cave to hibernate in for the winter.

Student Lounge (The Street) Cost: Comfortable couches may lure you to sleep and suck your study time dry.

Don’s (Don’s)

Roomy and comfy are at the top of the list at the lounges. It’s also nice when the Career Development Centre brings out morning tea snacks. Good for bumping into people you know and departing from a studious lifestyle, the lounges feature a 360 degree view of life at Bond, from the sleep-deprived to the social butterflies. You also get melodious tunes wafting through the Princeton Room. This beauty is guaranteed to make you smile!

Cost: More beer than your brain can handle. Overlooking the fountain and arch, Don’s is a renovator’s dream. When studying, just be sure to block your ears from loud music, your eyes from short skirts and your tastebuds from alcoholic beverages. Don’t kid yourself though, resisting temptation is not for the fainthearted. Don’s offers a good reward system for those willing to work hard and play hard.

Lakeside (Literally... the side of the lake) Cost: Tendency to blow away books… and dresses. There’s something peaceful in lazing about on the stone-cold ground by the lake. This location is ideal for sun-tanning girls, meditating hippies and pervert guys waiting for Marilyn Monroe winds. But don’t let that discourage you from an outdoorsy connection. You’ll just love the sprinkle of refreshing water, infinite seating possibilities and the ability to people-watch as far as the eye can see. Dibs it now before it goes under and be sure to get flood insurance.

The Thinking Steps (Smokers’ Alley) Cost: Beware of smokers billowing their sweet, sweet nicotine in your direction. (Flavour country.... It’s a big country.) This place is perfect for students sprawling between the ancient columns in an attempt to imitate Greek scholars. You want sun-dappled dreams? You got it. Yet be careful not to sink into reverie; you might just find yourself drowning in excessive smoke. Famous for rubbing off knowledge and tripping the hell out of you, these steps also help in judging distance – a useful wake-up call to cure your hangover blues. If you also like pretending to be in a movie, this spot is for you. The lighting casts a natural, godly allure on you so no wonder this is a good pick up spot (“Can I borrow your lighter?” seems to

Business Breakfast Tuesday 9:30am - 11:30am Sponsored by The Institute of Chartered Accountants

Opening Party Tuesday 8:45pm - 3:00am Buses to Platinum Bar departing from Dons at 8:45

Beach Cricket Wednesday by the Water

Touch Girls games kicks off Thursday at 6:30pm

Football Bus vs Law Rugby and Empire! Kicks off Thursday at 7:30pm. Cheerleaders will be supporting the teams!

USA v RoW Photographer: Ash Adams

HSA Pool Sesh Photographer: James Fitchett

Mid Sem Fiesta Photographer: Katerina Kaliviotis

Battle of the Big Guns Photographer: Zee Tarona

Hey you! Yeah, you! What are you doing today at 1pm? Oh... that sounds awful. I’ve got a better idea. Take part in Bond’s Greatest Athlete. Well, I suppose that all depends when you read this. If you just picked this up hot off the presses, holding it in one hand with your Wednesday by the Water horsemeat sandwich in the other, then you’re just in time. Swallow that meat down first though. Thattaboy. Now, grab a ticket for Bond’s Greatest Athlete. They’re only $10 and all profits are going straight to the Premier’s Disaster Relief Fund - you know, all those people who copped it from the floods and Cyclone Yasi. They need the money and you probably need to do something physical after eating that disgusting sandwich. We’ve been selling them under the arch for a couple of weeks now - not non-stop, of course, we’re all very devoted but we can prioritise. We are also selling them at the sports hall and we forgive you for not getting in sooner. Ok, once you’ve got your ticket head over to the sports hall. First off, I should probably let you know what you’re in for. I’ve waxed lyrical about it already for two straight weeks and you’re probably sick of it, but Bond’s Greatest Athlete is the ultimate physical test - our way of figuring out who is the buffest of the buff and the toughest of the tough at our great institution. It’s essentially a series of challenges that will test you in every physical way imaginable. First, there’s skill - a challenge testing your accuracy with a soccer ball, a rugby ball, a Sherrin and a basketball. There’s acceleration and speed, with our bike distance test, a 40 metre dash and the dreaded beep test. And there’s strength, as we’ll test your ability to benchpress 70% of your body weight. We’ve set up this magical system of scoring your success in each of these events. If you’re the winner, you get a freaking trophy and the pride of being able to call yourself Bond’s Greatest Athlete. It sells itself, I know, but even if you fall short there’s a range of prizes including t-shirts, hats, surfing lessons, theme park tickets and dinner vouchers to maddog restaurants - so everyone’s a winner, really. I’m done here. I appreciate you reading all this but you should probably start to make a move and mosey on down to the sports hall. Quickly now. Keep an eye and an ear out for the results - the winner may be announced at a prominent sporting event on a Thursday night. Don’t forget to pick up next week’s Scope to see how it all went down.

Vinnie Rugari

Wednesday 16/3/2011 13:00 - 15:00

The Flood Appeal - Aiding our fellow men and women in need There is nothing more satisfying than helping others. It is a unique feeling. I would recommend it to all if you are lacking in philanthropy hours. For those uninformed, there has been two volunteering initiatives in the past fortnight. The initial venture was an effort by BIRO (Bond International Relations Organisation) in collaboration with BUSA and other concerned clubs and individuals. Close to 60 awesome people devoted their Sundays to go up to Goodna and assist people in the rebuilding of their houses and lives (technically it was the tearing down of the house, but it sounded better in the first instance). I was, unfortunately, far too ill and far too overworked to go on the first expedition. So, I picked up my fallen ego and set off for a fantastic voyage to the dilapidated North-West. This all in an attempt to try, even in such a small way, to make someone’s life a little easier. The second journey was to be a collaboration between ACES and BASIC. What, you say? The drinking clubs were doing something other than keeping you awake and getting smashed? Well, ACES was. No one from BASIC graced our presence that day. Perhaps it was the partying the night before that stopped them (it didn’t stop ACES); or it could be the fact that you can’t wear salmon coloured shorts, v-neck shirts, tight jeans and havaianas on a job site. Sorry lads, but gelled hair and lo-carb beers have no place in a blue collar world. (Mind you, I think I managed to pull off a pair of skinny jeans quite well, with a patented tear to hold assorted tools). But, on I write.... We (on the second journey) set off at roughly about 7pm. Half the crew were hung-over from some 21st festivities the night prior. With blood-shot eyes and key tones emerging from every pore in their bodies, they sat in contempt on the trip up. Some genius decided to stop over at Yatala pies, and after for assorted pies, we continued in our travels. The pies were a terrible idea. They did nothing to alleviate the illness of alcohol or a severe lack of sleep the night before. But, soldier on we did. We arrived and surveyed the situation. At first glance, you couldn’t actually tell how much water actually came through. Upon closer inspection, it was nothing short of phenomenal how much water passed through that area. The place we were working at had been completely submerged: A friggin’ house on stilts. It was a good six to eight metres, and was nearly 1km away from the river bank.

Peter Clayton

The house was still in quite good condition. The gyprock was removed the week before and all that remained was some demo work on the ceiling, the bathroom, and ensuring that the frame was ready for construction to begin as soon as possible. We got quite a lot done in the seven to eight hours that we were there, and Owen (the house owner) was thrilled. It was a good feeling, driving back with calloused hands, cut and grazes everywhere and the stomach churning from the foolishly purchased breakfast pie. Congratulations and many thanks to all of the people who participated over the past fortnight. It is an honour to serve with you, and a pleasure that so many people were willing to devote their Sunday. Adios, au revoir, auf wiedersehen and adieu to some fantastic memory and fun times.

Express Yourself!

Chantal Drysdale

For everyone who took the public speaking elective, I am sure you learnt bucket-loads and that you apply Mike’s Magic Maxims in every presentation you have done since your completion of the subject. For those of you that elected to spend 12 weeks in Comm Skills, shame on you!

Yourself’ public speaking program aims to achieve this by teaching kids how to express themselves in a public setting. It helps kids gain leadership positions and present themselves to the world with self assurance and confidence thats will set them apart from the rest.

Public speaking is an art. While some people are born with the gift of the gab, most of us have to learn how to annunciate our words while remembering the importance of eye contact, body language and a well structured speech. An ability to speak proficiently and with confidence in public is a skill that cannot and should not be underestimated.

More recently, 12 of your fellow Bond students were at The Southport School braving the grade six and seveners. They assisted the students in discovering their inner Obama/Martin Luther King/Churchill. It is not only great fun but a fantastic way for Bond students to give back to the community. The ‘chair bashing’ activity has proven itself a favourite with participants of the program, intended to bring all those involved out of their comfort zone. To clarify, the activity involves:

Fifty lucky grade seven students at All Saints Anglican School will not have to face the horrors of being ill prepared and lacking confidence when public speaking. Last Wednesday a group of our very own Bond SIFE (Students In Free Enterprise) representatives took a condensed version of Mike Grenby’s public speaking program out to All Saints and helped the students develop their confidence and public speaking prowess. The program, aptly named ‘Express Yourself’, is all about encouraging kids to speak publicly with confidence, capability and conviction. According to the SIFE website, “SIFE students are changing the world by making a difference in their local communities. They invent new futures for themselves and for others through entrepreneurial educational outreach projects”. The ‘Express

1. taking a pool noodle 2. taking a chair 3. bashing the chair with the pool noodle and simultaneously introducing yourself - shouting being mandatory. The ‘express yourself’ public speaking program is a SIFE initiative that sees Bond SIFE students taking a valuable skill out to the wider community. While we may not immediately create the next winner of the ‘toastmasters international’, I like to think we will at least be aiding in the creation of more confident children.

World Leaders Mona Mizikovsky

I’d say it’s fair that we expect a certain level of professionalism from our national leaders. We expect them to dress in mundane suits whilst doing grown-up things such as signing treaties with their firm, statesman grip on their overly priced Mont Blanc fountain pen. Time and time again, however, our world leaders are caught with their pants down - literally. No, Gaddafi hasn’t been caught sleeping with his harem of virgin female security force in his fancy Bedouin tent, but there is the odd world leader out there who can’t keep his business under the sheets. I am here to educate you on those world leaders who have found themselves publically caught in this pickle.

Jacob Zuma Why have one wife when you can have four, five or even six? Well, that’s exactly what Jacob Zuma, President of South Africa, thought! He currently has six wives and 20 children costing him a cool two million in upkeep each year. And even though Mr Zuma has six wives, presumably taking care of all his “needs”, he has still found time to have one child out of wedlock and six other children to his multiple girlfriends. But if you were worrying about Zuma getting infected with HIV, seeing as it’s a bit of a problem in South Africa, do not stress. Zuma claims to be able to starve off the disease by merely showering after having intercourse with an infected woman. Well, good Luck with that one, Jacob.

Bill Clinton It was the world famous scandal dubbed “Monicagate”, Lewinskygate”, “Tailgate”, “Sexgate”, and/or “Zippergate”. Yes, it was those nine sexual encounters that 22 year old Monica Lewinsky claimed to have had with American Democratic President, Bill Clinton. Lewinsky actually claimed that one occurred whilst Bill Clinton was on the phone with a member of Congress… ewww. Awkward turtles aside, Bill adamantly denied the accusations with those famous words “I did not have sexual relations with that woman”. Long story short, Clinton finally admitted some three years later that the agreed-upon definition of “sexual relations” included giving oral sex but excluded receiving oral sex, which clearly exempted his actions as… uhm… not sexual relations? But who really cares? I mean, Lewinsky seems to have drawn the longer straw out of the situation, appearing in adds for Jenny Craig and knitting her way out of the crisis, which ultimately led her to establish her own personal hang bag line. Whilst I’m here, I might as well mention those other two indiscretions that reportedly occurred between the ladies and Clinton during his time as the Governor of Arkansas. But if there is anything we can take from this story – Bill, not on state time, alright? 16

Caught With Their Pants Down Kevin Rudd One may often find themselves sitting back and asking how on earth did K.Rudd end up running this country for three years? Well, I wouldn’t necessarily say it’s his cunning wit, fluency of the Chinese language, or flowing blonde locks. I put my money on the fact that in 2003, whilst on a tax payer funded trip to Manhattan, Kevin Rudd visited a “gentlemen’s club” and got so drunk he can’t recall the activities of the night. One may wonder what K.Rudd actually gets up too on his multitude of international trips as our new foreign minister? Ahh, if that’s isn’t the Australian spirit, I don’t know what is. Good on ya K.Rudd.

Silvio Berlusconi While the rest of the world is battling natural disasters reminiscent of ‘2012’; or silencing their people’s requests for democracy with heavy ammunition; Italy’s prime minister, Silvio Berlusconi, has been having way more fun. We all know partying with younger women brings way more excitement to your life and Berlusconi is definitely the poster child for this. His ex-wife reportedly told one newspaper that she could not stay with a man who “consorted with minors”. Evil ex-wives aside, Berlusconi usually limits himself to just paying younger escorts to attend parties at his house. Recently, however, it seems his youthful inclinations have gotten the better of him. Italian prosecutors are currently after him to stand trial on charges of paying for sex with Ruby, a teenaged Moroccan nightclub dancer, when she was just 17. Obviously, the Italian people aren’t too happy about this little indiscretion, with hundreds of thousands of Italian women taking to the streets to protest against Berlusconi. As for the legal ramifications, it’s quite easy to see Berlusconi has become a friend of the Italian justice system. He claims that over the last twenty years he had made 2,500 court appearances in 106 trials, at a legal cost of 200m Euros. Berlusconi is yet to be convicted of anything, but I don’t think he is going to come out of this one winning. The investigation into the Ruby situation uncovered evidence of what many Italians had suspected. Women who were pretty, dressed like dolls and were disponibili (willing to have sex with powerful men) were proven to be making millions and landing jobs in positions of authority thanks to Berlusconi. Ahh meatballs and fettuccine, what’s a man going to do…


Scope Review Rango

The Adjustment Bureau I’m starting to like this new genre of science fiction romance that “The Adjustment Bureau” falls into. Hollywood seems to have learned how to add a significant amount thought to their films, just with their usual dumbing-down procedures. David (Matt Damon) has met Elise (Emily Blunt) and based on one spontaneous kiss and one flirtatious encounter, he’s determined that she’s the one he’s supposed to be with. They have other plans. Oh yes, the indefinable, ambiguous pronoun “they”. Just to keep a sense of the intrigue afloat, I’ll define “they” as the men of “The Adjustment Bureau”. What they want, we don’t really know. But David wants the girl—a beautiful girl—but just a girl nonetheless. For us, questions of free will, fate, soul mates, success and pre-defined destinies abound. All running around an intricate maze of New York architecture. Although intricate might not be the best word because there’s nothing here for us to figure out; the film lays everything out well in advance, and over and over again in case you missed it. At least there’s intelligence to the story but unfortunately no subtlety. “The Adjustment Bureau” has pretty city-scapes and pretty people playing more profound characters than pretty people usually play. As with most genre-mixing films, there is something for everybody. I got the intelligence that is usually sorely missing from big-budget Hollywood action films although I could have done with a bit more respect.

The Western is back, and is more colourful and bizarre than ever. Welcome to the aptly named town of Dirt, inhabited by a quirky array of talking desert creatures. Now allow me to introduce the new sheriff in town, Rango (Johnny Depp). ‘All you have to do is blend in’. This is the advice given to the misplaced chameleon on his arrival to the Wild West; advice he just can’t seem to follow. Armed with a toy goldfish, a headless mannequin, and dressed in a lurid Acapulco shirt, Rango is anything but inconspicuous. For those expecting a kids flick, well…you chose the wrong movie. From half-dead talking road kill, to a rattlesnake with guns blazing; this is no Gnomeo and Juliet. Though, that’s certainly not a bad thing. The film is essentially the animated form of HBO series Deadwood; with a few Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas references thrown in along the way. Rango is filled to the brim with classic Western references, epitomized in an epiphany scene between Rango and the Spirit of the West (voiced by Deadwood’s Timothy Olyphant). This ode to the spaghetti Western is unlike any other animated film you’ll see. For one, it refreshingly didn’t conform to the latest Hollywood 3D fad. Though that isn’t to suggest the film wasn’t visually engaging. The animation in Rango shows an exceptional attention to detail. Gore Verbinski (Pirates of the Caribbean) puts together a fantastic cast, with a variety of voice talent including Isla Fischer, Abigail Breslin, and Bill Nighy as Rattlesnake Jake. It seems as though the Western genre truly is back, with the recent success of the latest Coen Brother’s film True Grit (Jeff Bridges, Matt Damon), TV series Deadwood, and now the animated Rango. Even Tarantino’s next movie is rumoured to be a spaghetti Western. Rango certainly is a bizarre film. It’s also witty, charming, and unforgettable.

Rating: 8/10 Rating: 5.6/10 -- Josh White

-- Christina Webb

brain teasers

trivia Logic Puzzles

TRIVIA 1. In 1976, what color M & M was removed from this sweet treat but then returned?

1. 26 L of the A 2. 7 D of the W 3. 7 W of the W 4. 12 S of the Z 5. 66 B of the B 6. 52 C in a P (W J) 7. 13 S in the U S F 8. 18 H on a G C 9. 39 B of the O T 10. 5 T on a F 11. 90 D in a R A 12. 3 B M (S H T R) 13. 32 is the T in D F at which W F 14. 15 P in a R T 15. 3 W on a T 16. 100 C in a D

2. A man gets a speeding ticket in the mail, one with a photo of his car. He decides to “pay” it by mailing a photo of money. What photo did the police mail back to him? 3. When was the first Bugs Bunny cartoon made? 4. There is an English rhyme which denotes what will happen when you sneeze on certain days of the week. What will happen if you sneeze on Tuesday? 5. The inchworm has many natural predators, but which one of these is NOT their enemy? a) Paper wasps b) Birds c) Yellow jackets d) Snails

If you throw me from the window, I will leave a grieving wife. Bring me back, but in the door, and You’ll see someone giving life!

What king can you make if you take the head of a lamb the middle of a pig the hind of a buffalo and the tail of a dragon?

What am I? A potato’s key tool, I have all the power. I am generally used on the half or full hour. If my cells were deceased or lost or the such, My partner would only respond to your touch.

I am a protector. I sit on a bridge. One person can see right through me, while others wonder what I hide. What am I?

What am I? SHAPE SERIES Complete the series by choosing the correct shape from the four options.

17. 11 P in a F (S) T 18. 12 M in a Y 19. 13 is U F S 20. 8 T on an O 21. 29 D in F in a L Y 22. 27 B in the N T 23. 365 D in a Y 24. 13 L in a B D 25. 52 W in a Y 26. 9 L of a C 27. 60 M in an H 28. 23 P of C in the H B 29. 64 S on a C B 30. 9 P in S A 31. 6 B to an O in C 32. 1000 Y in a M 33. 15 M on a D M C

BRAIN TEASER Eagle-eye Ixolite, the world famous dart player, was at an exhibition match and was showing off to the audience. “I can throw a dart and it will hit the board anywhere I want!” he cried. “Where on the board shall I put my next dart?” he asked the crowd. A small boy came up to Eagle-Eye and passed him a slip of paper. Eagle-eye, who liked a rebus, took one look at the note, threw his head back and laughed, then threw the dart. Where did it land? This is what was on the note: Perfume Bottle R.I.P. HINT: A ‘rebus’ is the name of the puzzle in the top right hand corner FUN WITH PUNS These are quotes from George Carlin, one of America’s most popular wise guys. Can you decode them? Both puzzles use the same code. Q=M “DPKLSUQ SU D ORO-TYRTKLP RYMDOSEDPSRO.” “’S DQ’ SU YLTRYPLJWB PKL UKRYPLUP ULOPLOHL SO PKL LOMWSUK WDOMADML. HRAWJ SP FL PKDP ‘S JR’ SU PKL WROMLUP ULOPLOHL?”

Solutions can be found on Scope’s Facebook profile. Add us as a friend.


Scope Sport Bond Rugby's new era After a long pre-season, Bond University Rugby Club played its first game of the 2011 season last Saturday. The club’s executives Max Wolthers and Alex Morassut secured the services of two experienced coaches and major sponsorship to compliment the move up a grade to see a new era begin for the club. A relatively new squad, bolstered by several players from last season, eagerly took to the field. In hot conditions, playing a team that had a sizeable weight advantage, Bond knew they would be tested. All the players faced up to the challenge and never took one step back in defence. Playing with structure and purpose and lead by Dave Kapa in the forwards, some good plays were put together, but nerves saw a few handling errors fail to see the capitalisation of early gains. Nevertheless, some great defence by Simon Stephen on Bond’s try line stopped Colleges putting any points on the board in the first half. Liam Collins then pushed the laws of the game in a bone crunching tackle that gave the team the lift and confidence to be able to take on a physically bigger team. It was in the second half that all the points were scored. After falling behind following an error at the back of the scrum, the players responded magnificently. The combination of new fly half Mico Oliver and captain Jacques Joubert at inside centre began to click and saw the promise of the back line begin to emerge.

HOT Crisps Yeasayer Solo

Jess Cooper’s party Grudge Week

Max Wolthers

No Fly Zones Great support play saw Kieran Farr use his pace to score a fantastic try. Chad Kanovsky, after dislocating his finger only a few days earlier, made some blistering line breaks and was unlucky not to score. The Bond team took this momentum and grew in confidence by the second; rewarded for their hard toil with tries by Dave Kapa and Ben Parnham and a conversion by Kieran Farr that gave the university a victory 17-14. The whole team deserves credit for this victory, making it impossible to pick a Man of the Match. Special mention must go to Liam Collins and Ben Parnham for toiling all game without a break. Teddy McPherson must get a mention after showing great promise after being thrown into hooker and the club expect big things from him this season. Plenty of talking points from the game accompanied free flowing beer in true rugby club style as the team carried on late into the night at new sponsor Shooters Nightclub at the team’s season launch. A platform has been set there are lots of work to be done on the training field before the season opener against Surfers Paradise on the 19th March. Come down to the fields this Saturday with a 12.30 kick off and give your support and stand united with the team against the club everyone wants to beat.

Bond Tennis

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Gary Ludlow

Starting 22nd of March and finishing April 12th Bond Tennis is holding a teams competition on Tuesday nights. Teams will consist of 3 players and you can enter as a team or individual and I will place you in a team. Warm up starts at 5.00 matches begin at 5.30 and should finish between 7.00 to 7.30. Each team member will play 2 doubles matches. Winners will recieve trophies and names on perpetual trophy. This competition is for players that can maintain a 5 to 10 ball rally.

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Entry for this event is $25 per player. Please contact me for more details & to register. Ph: 0404 470415 Hippo milk is pink

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One minute with...

Kendall Lyons

Degree: Psychology Nationality: American Where in the US are you from? Conneticuit. Why are you studying psychology ? So I can psychoanalyse my friends. If you could have dinner with anybody alive or dead, who would it be with and why? Charlie Sheen, because I want to be bi-winning. Where do you want to go while you are in Australia? Melbourne and Cairns and I’ve booked to go to both. What do you miss the most about home? My bunny rabbit, April.

Biggest difference between Australians and Americans? Australians really are more laid back - and they’re not afraid wear tiny swinsuits. What has been your best experience in Australia so far? Going to Mardi Gras in Sydney and getting directions from a woman who was completely naked and painted like a rainbow.

Scope 111 Week 09  

Scope 111 Week 09

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