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Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way Choosing the right path in life comes when you make the right choices – working out what you want and how to get there are what you are going to do in this handbook. The Red Bus Imagine you want to drive a red bus, you have an instructor who teaches you how to steer the bus and which route to take. Eventually you become proficient in your new position as a bus driver and can go out on your own. You are now responsible for the passengers who you pick up on route both regulars and passers-by and they rely on you to take them to their destination. Then one day you forget everything you have been taught and decide to take a new route. You know it is the wrong. Your passengers become so alarmed that they ask to get off and before you realise it you are lost. What does this story tell you?

Having vision when creating your life path and using creativity and imagination will make your journey more fun. Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 1


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way This handbook covers the foundation blocks you need to live, to laugh, to love and to learn. As a human being you are also an individual who is valued and respected. Your path and goals in life can only be achieved if you believe they are possible and suppress any disruptive or destructive behaviour. Recognising and changing disruptive and destructive behaviour is key to reaching those goals. Beliefs, thoughts and behaviour Our thoughts strongly influence our actions. Think of the mind and body link and try the following exercise: Sit quietly and think of a time when you felt tired or even weak. Think about everything around you, what you could hear, feel, see. Notice the detail and even those who were around you at the time. Get in touch with some of the physical and emotional feelings and hold those thoughts and feelings for about 10 seconds. Now stand up. Notice what you experience now you have finished the exercise and sit down again. This time think of a time when you felt energetic and strong. Again remember what you could see, hear and feel and notice the detail, including those around you. Hold these thoughts for 10 seconds. Now stand up. Now compare the two experiences. There is a strong unconscious drive to behave consistently with our beliefs, so our beliefs influence our thoughts. Beliefs = Thoughts (self talk) = Behaviour (actions) Detaching yourself from unpleasant feelings is a great way of combating external stress or dealing with destructive emotions. Close you eyes: 1.Think of a time when you were stressed or had strong negative thoughts or feelings. 2. Imagine stepping out of your body leaving behind all those thoughts or feelings. 3. Notice how you become calmer, cooler and more rational. Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 2


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way

Another method for dealing with problems is to repeat the following phrases regularly: I I I I I

have behaviours but I am more than those behaviours have feelings but I am more than those feelings have thoughts but I am more than those thoughts am greater than those behaviours, feelings and thoughts control them, they do not control me

Do this a few times a day for several weeks to make a difference. There is also something called the bell-jar technique. Here you imagine a perspex inverted bell-jar surrounding you. You imagine the container stops other people's bad thoughts and feelings from touching you. They are blocked out totally. Relaxation Relaxation is a great mental exercise. The following is a simple example of a relaxation process: Get into a comfortable sitting or lying position in a quiet place Focus on your breathing Ensure your stomach moves out when you breathe in Notice the rhythm of your breathing Notice where you are most relaxed Compare the level of relaxation in different parts of your body – hand, shoulders, legs, arms, neck, feet etc. Allow this to go on for two or three minutes Either continue this process regularly or add the technique of visualisation by visualising a positive past experience or a future positive experience The box The use of symbols and music are useful options for people. The aim is to pick objects, photographs, pictures or music that give you positive feelings or thoughts. You could keep them in a drawer or box, which you could also decorate with positive images. Larger objects can be placed around the home, although smaller objects are more portable, items like music can be played on a personal music system. If you have a favourite piece of music that makes you feel good then when try playing it when you Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 3


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way get disruptive thoughts and see how they change. Mental imagery Sit comfortably and let yourself relax. If you are tense your muscles will get differing messages. Now think of a specific goal. Decide what skills you will need and what you need to learn to make this goal happen. Now imagine yourself carrying out this goal and notice how you feel. Think about what you see, hear and feel as you achieve this goal. Try and keep this mental image in your head and practice it often, so you begin to believe this goal is possible and very real. Good things about me

Not so good things about me

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 4


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way Rules of engagement Me

NLP Practitioner to to to to to to to to to to

Signed by:

treat you with respect value your beliefs help you achieve your goals be polite be understanding listen be treated with respect have my beliefs valued be treated in a polite manner be listened to

Signed by Practitioner:

Date: Should you not comply with these rules of engagement, the practitioner has the right to re-evaluate this training programme.

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 5


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way

Brain mapping – choose a topic Topic:

Name:

Connected Idea:

Connected Idea:

Connected Idea:

Connected Idea:

Main Subject:

Connected Idea:

Connected Idea:

Connected Idea:

Connected Idea:

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright © 2008 Page 6


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way Notes Subject Date

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 7


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way Task Planner Day

Morning

Midday

Afternoon

Evening

Monday

Tuesday

Wednesday

Thursday

Friday

Saturday

Sunday

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 8


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way

My networks Family Friends Advocates

Groups/organisations/ memberships Person (ME)

Community connections

Paid support

Make a list of all those people in your networks. These are the people that help you in your everyday life

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 9


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way

Socialising Describe what your ideal friend would be like

Notes

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 10


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way Social activities Activity

My participation

Living in the community

Education

Work

Living with family

Self help

Hobbies and interests

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 11


Reach for the Skies Tel 01825 840095 Email: janet@janetstead.co.uk Website http://www.janetstead.co.uk

Your Life, Your Way Personal schedule Activity

Support required

Community

Balanced activities

Education

Availability of courses,groups, workshops

Work

Organisation and planning

Living with family

Quality time

Self help

Problem solving

Hobbies and interests

Identifying

Comments

Finding the right kind of activities for you needs to be balanced with an emphasis on decreasing dependence on others. Creating a personal pictorial schedule You may prefer to use pictures in your schedule

Planning to go out shopping Plan where you are going, how you are going to get there, what transport to use, how much this costs. If you are not good with money, count out your money for transport and put it in a small envelope of special pocket in your bag, so you don't get flustered. Planning is a bit like a recipe, if you follow the recipe for making a cake, you first have to buy all the ingredients, measure them out and follow the instructions, so why not make that kind of commitment to your own journey in life.

Janet Stead, NLP Practitioner, Reach For The Skies Copyright Š 2008 Page 12


My Life, My Way