OUT £15 Million
OUT £6.2 Million
IN £2 Million
OUT £5 Million
GENIUS IN £.5.5 Million
In Loads of Cash
IN £.5.5 Million
Get in Touch with Jack Swan www.JackSwan.co.uk / 07974 055529
*2 STEAKS for £12 or **KIDS EAT FREE with this Advert
*terms & conditions. *9 Oz Big Plate Special, **Free Kids Meal With Every Full Price Meal. Not Available in Conjunction with Big Daily Deals or any other offer. Valid until 30th September 2012.
BIG DEALS £8.49 2 for
Terms & Conditions apply. Cannot be used with any other offers or promotions.
ALL DAY MONDAY TO FRIDAY
MONDAY to FRIDAY
WHERE YOU SEE THIS SYMBOL
MONDAY - FRIDAY BURGER, CHIPS & PINT £4.99
Choose From the Classic Burger, Cajun Chicken Burger or Tandoori Veg Burger
21st Joe Schmo
MONDAY £1 off all Sizzlers
See our specials board for more details
TUESDAY KIDS EAT FOR £1
Any meal £1 from the kids menu with every adult meal purchased. Excludes Kids Meal Deals
WEDNESDAY CURRY & PINT £4.99
Choose any regular Curry and a drink from the drinks shown below.
THURSDAY FREE DESSERT with any BIG PLATE SPECIAL
Free Starter or Dessert and £2 extra 3rd course excludes: Ultimate BIG Combo for Two, Millionaire’s BIG Candymania & BIG Rocky Road
FRIDAY FISH & CHIPS 2 for £8.49 SUNDAY ROASTS 2 for £10 2 BIG PLATE SUNDAY ROASTS £12 2 fo £12 excludes BIG plate Lamb Shanks
234 Dunvant Road, Dunvant, SA2 7SL
01792 208112 firstname.lastname@example.org
itting comfortably, second in the table and cemented in a Champions League place. Michu stands as joint top goal scorer alongside RVP. We’re Top goal scorers in the league with more different goal scorers than any other team. Meanwhile Sigurdson is yet to score, Scott Sinclair is yet to kick a ball for Citeh while Brendon Rogers is fighting relegation. OK it’s a little early and we probably shouldn’t get too carried away but it’s quite good being a Swans fan at the moment isn’t it. September brings with it some winnable games although as we know, their all tough in this league yet all winnable. So where are we at? And how good are we? I still don’t know to be honest. We got gifted early goals against QPR and West Ham which made for two easy games but it’s easy to play football when 1 or 2 up. I was very impressed to come from behind twice against Sunderland, who are, I’d like to add, the most boring side in the league. Martin O’Neil has not made a friend here, a boring Irishman - I didn’t think they made them. As the games have gone on Michu looks better and better, De Guzman less so and nobody informed me that ‘Chico time’ meant the time when your banned for a few matches but it seems like our crazy Spaniard may spend quite a while this season doing just that.
Ki did well when he came on against Sunderland but was poor along with the whole mid-field against Barnsley in the cup. I think we’re all excited about Hernandez but where will he play? I’m gutted to see Taylor out for the season. It’s been a fairytale 12 months for the youngster, his incredibly early red card at Nottingham Forest a very distant memory. He’ll make it back and like his set back at the City Ground; I’m sure he will be a better player for this set back. He may, cruel as football can be, find it hard to get back in ahead of Ben Davies. The Neath born left back looks real quality and a better player than Taylor did this time last year. I hope that Laudrup has the faith in Davies that Brendon had in Taylor and doesn’t bring in an emergency loan player. Anyway, its exciting times and we’ll all know a lot more this time next month. If we’re still second, we can start really dreaming. .
C���r� Ja�� Sw��
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� C�ntac� 07974 0��529
THE OTHER PLACE 9 Ynysderw Rd, PONTARDAWE, SA8 4EG. Call 01792 862999
All SWANSEA CITY GAMES LIVE Multi Screen Venue, SKY SPORTS, ESPN & AT THE RACES Live music Saturday Night & Sunday afternoon McEwan’s Cold £2.10 a pint Pool & Darts Function Room - available to hire Pontardawe Festival @ The Other Place
LIVE GIGS @ The Other Place
Phil Rowe with The Journey Men playing Sat 22nd
Sat 8th @ 9pm Sunshine Cab Co Sun 9th @ 4pm Warren & Co Sat 15th @ 9pm Spitfire Sun 16th @ 4pm Jammo Sat 22nd @ 9pm Journey Men Sun 23rd @ 4pm Intoxicated Rednecks Sat 29th @ 9pm Itchy Feet Sun 30th @ 4pm Bus Stop
'T�� K��e�� S����� G��r�r�' A
W��� S�n� Y��n� �� K� t� Sw�n�e�'� c��p�i��? B� M����� Jac��
fter sealing a three year contract in South Wales, Ki Sung Yeung became not only the most expensive player in Korean history, but also the record breaking purchase in Welsh football history. He has joined Swansea City for an estimated £6 million pounds, a fee that smashes the previous club record held by Danny Graham and eclipses the £4 million Cardiff City splashed on Michael Chopra in 2009. Widely regarded as one of the top prospects in South Korea, Ki is lauded for his technical ability. The South Korean international possesses a great ability at set pieces along with a superb range of passing and shooting and it is these talents that have earned him his nickname 'The Korean Steven Gerrard'. Ki was born in Gwangju, South Korea in January 1989 and was sent to Australia by his father at fifteen years of age. He believed that Ki would not only be able to gain a better understanding of the English language by studying down under, but also be able to pursue a career in football if he was able to hone his skills there. This sacrifice paid dividends for Ki as he became a fluent English speaker, but his performances for his school in Queensland at the nder 15 national championships (aka the Bill Turner cup) in 2004 led to offers from professional clubs. Despite interest from A-League side Brisbane Roar, Ki opted for a return to his homeland to join FC Seoul and made his senior debut for them in 2007. It was at Seoul that he increased his burgeoning reputation as a composed central midfield playmaker, his most successful campaign coming in 2008 as he played a crucial role in Seoul finishing an unprecedented second in the Korean League. Ki finished the campaign with four goals in twenty one games, the most important of those coming in the local derby against Suwon Blue Wings in the 92nd minute, which won him the hearts of the Seoul faithful. He began the 2009 season at Seoul but his performances had attracted the attention of a number of clubs in Europe including Hamburg, PSV Eindhoven and Porto, and a move away seemed inevitable. It was Scottish giants Celtic who
eventually clinched his signature for a fee of £2.1 million in December 2009 and made his debut at Parkhead in January 2010. At the end of the 2009-2010 season, Ki was selected in the twentythree man squad for the World cup in South Africa and played in all three group games for South Korea. They were eventually sent packing by Uruguay, but Ki had caught the eye once again with some assured performances for his country. Ki went on to make over sixty appearances in two seasons for the Bhoys and picked up an SPL title and a Scottish cup winners medal during his time there. At the end of the 2011-2012 season his performances at club level and internationally were beginning to attract interest once again, with a whole host of clubs keen to sign him. Ki was selected for the South Korean Olympic football squad and played a crucial role in helping his nation to a third placed finish, and it was his penalty that sent Team GB crashing out in Cardiff. Ki returned to Korea once the games had finished while the likes of Arsenal, Borussia Dortmund and Liverpool continued to be linked with him, but no firm offer materialised. It was the Swans who eventually made an offer and the midfielder has now completed his move to South Wales to become the latest addition to what is shaping up to be an exciting squad under Michael Laudrup.
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
I watched Ki play for South Korea against Team GB during the Olympics and was very impressed with his contribution, but for the benefit of those who are maybe wondering what Ki has to offer in a midfield that boasts plenty of technically gifted players I spoke to a Celtic fan site 'The Bhoys' (@GlasgowGandW for those on Twitter) to get their opinion on his transfer. What can Swansea fans expect from Ki? ESV: What will Ki Sung Yeung bring to Swansea? The Bhoys: He's a very technically gifted player with a good shot who will do much better in the premier league as he'll get more time to show his stuff and play. He takes free kicks and corners too. ESV: What would you say is his strongest position? Would he be better utilised as an attacking midfielder? The Bhoys: He's got a great range of passing so he is better off playing in a deep lying playmaker role which I think he will at Swansea. ESV: Are there any aspects of his game he could improve? The Bhoys: He never really coped well with the packed midfields he faced in the SPL and the physical side of the SPL, he flattered to deceive and was never really first choice. He was more of a luxury than a necessity but we have lots of options to play a central midfield role at the moment like Ledley, Wanyama and Brown. ESV: One final question, will he be missed by Celtic fans at Parkhead? He was very good on the eye and should thrive at Swansea. He's a good player and the deal is a good one for both clubs. From the interview alone it's clear that Celtic fans felt he was a little light for the SPL, but acknowledge his quality. His experience of the SPL will aid his integration into premier league life. It could be argued that he will come up against packed and
physical midfields when teams visit the Liberty, but our passing style should suit him perfectly and enable him to showcase his talents. The loss of Joe Allen early in the transfer window was viewed as a real body blow to Swansea, and many wondered how Laudrup would move to replace the Welsh international. It seems he believes he has found the answer in the dynamic Korean. For me, the signing of Ki shows a statement of intent from Laudrup to not only survive in the premier league but make an attempt to improve on last season's impressive finish under Rodgers. The Dane has already proven to have connections in the transfer market, with new arrivals Michu, Chico Flores and John De Guzman all impressing the Jack army in the opening two games of the premier league season. It seems he has looked to add a goal threat all over the park and take pressure off our lone front-man. It seems that there has been a subtle change in approach from Laudrup to narrow the pitch and encourage our wide men to support the striker when we go forward, while the likes of De Guzman and now Ki can look to play defence splitting passes and when possible spread the play to wider positions so our fullbacks can overlap and attack the space behind the opposition. Where perhaps last season we were a little pedestrian in possession of the ball, and attacking opportunities would sometimes pass us by, under Laudrup we have looked to move the
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
ball forward much quicker, so there should also be chances for the Korean to show us what he can do in terms of not only his shooting, but his skill in dead ball situations at free kicks and corners. If Michu can continue his blistering start to the campaign, he and Ki could become an exciting pair to play behind Danny Graham.
feature more regularly, especially away from home to add a little more bite to the central area, but in terms of the tempo we attempt to maintain and our passing rhythm, the energy Ki possesses could be more useful when it comes to unlocking tricky defences in the same way Joe was utilised last season.
I had the pleasure of watching Ki make his debut against Barnsley, where he showed some nice touches throughout and displayed his ability to go past his marker in midfield. I felt there's more to come from him however, we saw little or nothing of his shooting ability on the night. It was important for him to get a feel for the Liberty before a big game on the weekend against Martin O'Neill's Sunderland side, who will pose a completely different challenge to the one he faced against the Tykes. Let us also bear in mind that this was merely a cup game and the result was of more importance than the performance in my book. I was pleased with what I saw from him on Tuesday and am excited to see what he brings when he has Leon Britton and Michu for company in central midfield. He will need to be at his best to gain a regular spot in our midfield, which as I alluded to earlier his packed with technical ability. I have said in previous pieces I would like to see Kemy Agustien
I have high hopes for Ki, and believe he can play an important role as we look to establish ourselves as a premier league club. With the transfer window open until Friday there could yet be new additions to our squad, along with all our other new arrivals Ki will need to work hard but I believe he has the quality to be a real success story. Who would have thought nine years ago as we fought tooth and nail to stay in the football league that we would one day spend six million pounds on one man AND top the Premier league in the same weekend? It's a very exciting time to be a Jack. Thanks to @GlasgowGandW You can follow me on Twitter @OriginalMattyJ Email me at eaststandjack.gmail.com Follow my blog:
EAST STAND VOICE Swansea City: More than just a Football Club
out S IS as!!! M t ’ Don Christm this 25% OFF AN ADVERT WITH JACK SWAN WITH OUR CHRISTMAS OFFER!!!!!!* *When you take out an advert for October, November & December
Call: 07974 055529, EMail: email@example.com, Visit: www.jackswan.co.uk
Advertise in ALL our
remaining 8 Issues this season
(October, November, December, January, February, March, April & May for)
Full page £950 Half Page £550 Quarter Page £350 EIghth Page £200
Call: 07974 055529 EMail: Jack-swanlive.co.uk Visit: www.jackswan.co.uk
Smiths Arms Neath Road, Hafod SA1 2HR
01792 466776 * Showing * All Premier Games Sat 3PM to Include Swansea Home & Away
Burger Van Open Matchdays Bar & Lounge
Great Food 7 Days a Week
Can Dine for less than
Large Rear Car Park
Mon - Fri 12-5pm
Large Jacket Potatoes Warm Baguettes Burgers Daily Specials Breakfasts New Specials every day Childrens Menu Homemade Dishes
Fresh from the Grill
20 oz Mixed Grill £10.50
3 Sittings - 12 noon, 1.30pm, 3.00pm
10 oz Rump Steak £7..50
Choice of: Beef, Turkey or Pork A choice of 3 roasts served on a warm plate with roast potatoes, stuffing & Yorkshire Pudding.
5 oz Rump Steak £4.75 10oz Horseshoes Gammon £6.95 8oz Rib Eye Steak £8.45 8oz Sirloin Steak £14.95 Rack of Ribs (8) £7.95 Rack of ribs (4) £4.95
Three Fresh Vegetables and Boiled Potatoes served in terrines including a choice of Garden Peas or Mushy Peas to help yourself, with lashings of homemade gravy. Adult - £7.50 Child (under 12) - £4.00
The Colliers New Road, Skewen, SA10 6ET Tel: 01792 324434
Open Monday to Thursday 2pm - Midnight. Fri, Sat & Sunday 12-12
Showing ALL Swans Games Whats On September Starting Soon Fri 7th Fabulous Cover Sluts
Lunchtime Carvery New Menu Meal Deals Pasta & Grills Find us on ThisIsWales
Sat 8th The Dopeys Fri 14th Backbeat Sat 15th L.A.F Fri 21st Warren & Co Sat 22nd Calypso Fri 28th Hidden Agenda Sat 29th Roo Kanga’s
Jack Swan Fantasy Football League WINNER IN AUGUST:
John Taylor of Pontardawe he said “I’ll win a whole new wardrobe easily. Nobody will beat me ever!!”
Join Jack Swans fantasy football league and WIN your own JackSwan T-Shirts Visit:
www.fantasy.premierleague.com League Code: 309794-201235
The highest player each month will win a T-Shirt 10
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
whether you call us
‘6J’s’ ‘The Gilbertson Suite’ or Pontardawe Football Club we are
UNDER NEW MANAGEMENT and a full range of beers, lagers, wine & spirits
AVAILABLE FOR HIRE Ideal for Weddings Weddings, Engagements Engagements, Birthdays, Anniversaries, Trade Functions and all Special Occasions. LARGE STAGE and DANCE FLOOR with the Largest Capacity in the valley!
COME WATCH THE SWANS CLIMB THE TABLE! Big Screen • A Great Atmosphere Guaranteed All Matches Screened LIVE! • All Premiership & Championship Games & ALL Pay-Per-View Events including BOXING
2 Full Size SNOOKER TABLES - just £1 per 30 mins POOL TABLE - DARTS Live Music Every Saturday Night Open Mon - Fri: 4pm - 11pm • Sat & Sun: 12 noon - 11pm
For further details telephone 01792 862230
J��e� �� S��n�� Camilla goes to the Queen and says "Every time I suck Charles' knob I get acid indigestion!" The queen replies "have you tried Andrews?" BBC web site this morning : Shaking Stevens has got Parkinson’s Disease. From now on he would prefer in general to be referred to simply as Mr. Stevens A man goes to the doctor and says: 'Doctor, there's a piece of lettuce sticking out of my bottom.' The doctor asks him to drop his trousers and examines him. The man asks: 'Is it serious, doctor?' and the doctor replies: 'I'm sorry to tell you, but this is just the tip of the iceberg.' Today a man knocked on my door and asked for a small donation towards the local swimming pool.I gave him a glass of water. A little boy asked his mother: Mummy, why are you white and I am black? Don’t even ask me that, when I remember what went on at that party..., you are lucky that you don’t bark.
Gavin Hensons New Advert for Rugby T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
Q. What is theisdifference between a woman and aand washing machine? Q. What the difference between a woman a washing machine? A. You your load a washing machine and itand won't call you A.can Youbung can bung your in load in a washing machine it won't callayou a week week later. later. Q. Why women wear wear watches? Q. don't Why don't women watches? A. There's a clock on the A. There's a clock onstove! the stove! Q. What do a walrus and Tupperware have have in common? Q. What do a walrus and Tupperware in common? A. They both like tight seal. seal. A. They bothalike a tight Q. What's the difference between a wifea and wheelie bin? bin? Q. What's the difference between wifeaand a wheelie A. You to take wheelie bin once a week. A.only You have only have to out takea out a wheelie bin once a week. Q. What did the frogs frogs say tosay each other? Q. What didtwo thelesbian two lesbian to each other? A. WEA.DO LIKE LIKE CHICKEN! WETASTE DO TASTE CHICKEN! Q. What did the say tosay thetovibrator? Q. What didbanana the banana the vibrator? A. Why she's she's goinggoing to eattome. A. are Whyyou areshaking you shaking eat me. Q. What wouldwould happen if the ifPilgrims had killed cats instead of turkeys? Q. What happen the Pilgrims had killed cats instead of turkeys? A. We'd eat pussy everyevery Thanksgiving. A. We'd eat pussy Thanksgiving. Q. What's the difference between love and Q. What's the difference between loveherpes? and herpes? A. Love doesn't last forever. A. Love doesn't last forever. Q. A man that his credit card had stolenstolen but didn't reportreport it. Q. A noticed man noticed that his credit cardbeen had been but didn't it. A. The less then wife.. A.thief The was thiefspending was spending less his then his wife.. Q. Why men their their wives? Q. do Why do die menbefore die before wives? A. They want want to. to. A. They
Q. What's the difference between a Swans fan enjoying the match and ET? Q. What's the difference between a Swans fan enjoying the match and ET A. ETA. phoned home. ET phoned home. Q. What's in theintoilet of theofstar Q. What's the toilet theship star enterprise? ship enterprise? A. The log log A.captains The captains
We scored HOW MANY!
P�ea�� ��n�i�� Ja�� Sw�� ���� c�ntac��n� Go�
Did you know? Premier League clubs have spent almost £5bn on players since the transfer window was introduced 10 years ago with this summer's spending set to match last year's figure of more than £450m. Chelsea is the biggest spender with £681m going on transfer fees. Manchester City (£572m) and Liverpool (£414m) occupy second and third place. Branding Creating or redesigning a logo can cost millions. BP spent more than $200m on its redesign in 2008, for example. Yet some of the best-known logos cost little or nothing. Here are four of the cheapest. 1. Coca-Cola: $0. The logo was created by founder John Pemberton's bookkeeper, Frank Robinson, in 1835. Robinson also came up with the typeface, known as Spencerian script. 2. Google: $0. The original design was created in 1998 by Google co-founder Sergey Brin on the free graphics programm GIMP. 3. Twitter: $15. Twitter bought the rights to its famous bird for $15 from artist Simon Oxley on iStockphoto. 4. Nike. $35. Nike co-founder Phil Knight purchased the 'swoosh' from graphic design student Carolyn Davidson in 1971. Later, Davidson received 500 shares in Nike, now worth more than $600,000. Amusing business names 1. Alan Cartridge - print cartridges, 2. Suck-Cess - drainage services 3. Wok's cooking - chinese takeaway, 4. Barber Blacksheep - hairdressers 5. Tree Wise Men - Tree maintenance, 6. Wooden It Be Lovely - wooden toy shop, 7. Pane in the Glass - double glazing, 8. Facial attraction - beauticians, 9. Licence to Fill - sandwich bar, 10. Pulp Friction - paper recycling I love it here at Man City. .....Rosie can you get me another strawberry milkshake!
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
SCHOOL UNIFORMS WORK WEAR SPORTS WEAR STAG & HENS DANCE WEAR CORPORATE PRINTED TEES Office Hours:
Monday - Friday 9am to 4.30pm, Saturday 9am to 1pm
Contact us at
firstname.lastname@example.org or give us a call on 01792 646092 15
JACK SWAN TV Starring Matty
In our 3 episodes so far, Matty has revealed that Chico is his dream partner and said the words ‘I’m not being funny but....’ a record 695 times. He’s also been told off by his missus and appears to be getting drunker each episode.
Is definitely getting drunker every episode and more and more annoyed with Matty and his swearing antics. He’s learning Korean and Danish to bring a new audience to the greatest show on earth. Disappointed with lack of jokes though.
Some of the questions we have had on Jack Swan TV:“If you were to tell your parents that you are now gay and bring home one of the new Swans players as your gay lover. Which player would you chose?” “Whats your view on flatcocks watching football. My seat was ruined v West Ham as I have this fat bird with a new season ticket behind me abusing Dyer. Is it right that I’ve got to put up with this all season?” “How old is too old to wear the FULL replica kit?” “Does Laudrup dye his hair?” “Could Laudrup play in the premiership if we were short?” PLUS some less serious questons like “do we have cover for Taylor?” or “would you play Tate or Bartley while Chico is doing ‘Chico time’?”
WATCH JACKSWAN TV NOW AT www.jackswan.co.uk Text in your thoughts and questions after each game to 07974 055529 Please note: Special Guests may not include Cheryl Cole.
The Kings Head
Childrens Play Area
Quality Real Ale Full Disabled Access and WC
Quiz Night Tuesday & Sunday
Function Room Available
Live Music Every Friday Night
Extensive Car Park Facilities
Homemade Sunday Roast Adult £5.99 Child £3.99 Full Grill Menu Available 7 Days a Week
Extensive New Food Menu
All Swans Games on 4 Large Screens Full Sky Sports HD
PONTY BUTCHERS 71 Herbert Street, Pontardawe. Tel: 01792 863197
Always Many Offers Available from your Multi-Award Winning Master Butcher
23 Awards in National Championship
The Award Winning Butchers True Taste Awards: Peoples Choice. Top Butchers in GOLD AWARD SAUSAGE South Wales
GOLD AWARD BACON GOLD AWARD GAMON
Y��’�� T��e� T�� Res�, N�� T�� T�� Bes�
FREE LOCAL DELIVERIES EVERY FRIDAY
2nd Best Butchers in ALL of Wales
AS SEEN ON ITV
Ja��Sw�� T V Av��l���� a� w��.Ja��Sw�� .c�.��
THE UNION INN All Swans Games LIVE Great Food
Cafe Open Thur, Fri, Sat 9am-2pm Really Friendly Pub Pool & Darts
Just 2 miles from stadium
223 Port Tennant Rd. Tel 01792 655969
1 Capel Building
sters Cafe Clyd n w B e tt
er th a n M il
Breakfasts From £2.50 Opening Times
Jackets Burgers Toasties
Mon - Thur 6am - 5pm Friday 6am - 3pm Saturday 6am - 2pm
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� C�ntac� 07974 0��529
AC COMPUTER SERVICES FOR ALL YOUR COMPUTING NEEDS z
Internet/Wireless Set-up and Fault Finding
Tuition PCs Built To Suit Your Needs
Local Friendly Service Hundreds Of Satisfied Customers
No Job Too Small
Is your PC slow, infected with viruses or sluggish? Then give your PC a ‘SPRING CLEAN’
£35 All Inclusive
Tel: 07772 455 202
£10 OFF MOT WITH THIS ADVERT
Sure Fit Have Moved
We are here From Swansea: Get onto Fabian Way, heading towards Baglan so you go pass the Village hotel and the new SA1 development on your right. Take the right at the lights as if your going towards McDonalds. Then left at the roundabout, 1st exit. Keep on that road, pass Hancock & Brown on your right. The road enters a carpark and a block of units. We are unit 14. From M4 Junction 42 Head down Fabian way towards Swansea, past Amazon. Take a left at McDonalds. Then left at the roundabout, 1st exit. Keep on that road, passHancock & Brown on your right. The road enters a carpark and a block of units. We are unit 14
Unit 14, SA1 Business Park, Langdon Rd, Swansea, SA1 8QY
Ja��Sw�� T V Av��l���� a� w��.Ja��Sw�� .c�.��
J��e� �r�� Fa��bo�� Malkey apparently told the Queen and Charlie that Cardiff were the biggest team in Wales. Queenie, Charlie you Jack bastards! Chris Stevens
QPR Half-time team talk
left and above Marrio Ballotelli on Twitter What does las vegas and cardiff have in common ? you can pay for sex with chips in both of them ! Robert Wayne Cook Matty told me last weekend that he liked to wear his glasses when having sex. Why I asked why he replied "That way my eyes are protected from the pepper spray." Mattys girlfriend I learned 2 things about Matty over the weekend:1) he has a penis the size of 2 Argos pens 2) He’s banned from Argos Chris Stevens Heard a good Joke? Add JackSwan as a friend on Facebook and tell us the joke and we’ll publish it and your name in next isue (as long as its not too bad). Search Jack Swan 9237 and add us :) T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c��� 07974 0��529
Live music every weekend Pool / Darts/ Table Football £2 a Pint Wednesday 6pm-9pm Smoking Shelter Disco & Karaoke every Friday Sky Sports and ESPN Bar Meals Starting Mid-September Find Us on Facebook:Penybont Inn Heol Giedd, Ystradgynlais, 01639 842600 SA9 1LT
Kantelew half landscape.ai 1 15/09/2011 20:03:20
Superb Vocal/Guitar Duo
For Bookings Contact: Leighton Collins: 07963 937930 Phil Rowe: 07961 937238 E: email@example.com P�ea�� ��n�i�� Ja�� Sw�� ���� c�ntac��n� Go�
2) 3) 4) 5) Results to last months quiz are:- 1: David de Dea, 2: Ji Sung Park, 3: Andy Carroll 4: Angel Rangel 5: Danny Graham. If you can’t wait to see the answers for this month, you can see them on our website at www.jackswan.co.uk All these people got the quiz right last time out:Sid & crew highlander pub neath, Paul A, Paul H, Nipper & Fathead in Ecolab, Jim from Uplands, the Boys in Merlins (also got in right last time, sorry no mention), Rob Cook Britton Ferry, Wiggs, Big Al, Gandi & Bert in the Amla Inn, Landore, Kelly-Marie Guy & Jonny Rees, Matthew & Waggy at the Camrian Arms Melyn, Veggi & Louise in the Comercial Inn Brynhyfred, Rob & Broady at the Highlander, Rob from the Union Inn, Murph & Shaun in the farmers Waunarlwydd. Make your own Quiz for Jack Swan? We’re all out of questions. We need your help. Get us some ideas of new people and how to do them. Text in your answers and your ideas to 07974 055529
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
W���� ��� ���� n��?
Matty Matty manages to catch with real Swans and Welsh legend, goalkeeper Dai Davies. Dai starred as manages to up catch upa with a real Swans and Welsh legend, goalkeeper Dai Davies. Dai starred as we finished 6th the6th lastthe time were the top flight. we finished lastwe time weinwere in the top flight.
Are you still involved in the game? If so, where are youare playing? Are you still involved in the game? If so, where you playing? As a Welsh speaker I’m involved and employed by Sgorio which which As a Welsh speaker I’m involved and employed by Sgorio coverscovers mainlymainly the league of Wales, but also some the league of Wales, but also international some international matches, but I believe they don’t contract for thisfor year. matches, but I believe theyhave don’tthe have the contract this year. ohn Hartson is the top man thefor jobthe with but next John Hartson is the topfor man jobSgorio with Sgorio butweek next week he’s doing the international matchmatch and soand I willsobe covering his his he’s doing the international I will be covering commentary job. It means I’ve gotI’ve to got keep watching football commentary job. It means toon keep on watching football nd keep topon of top it, I enjoy andit, I’mand lucky that I get andon keep of it, I it, enjoy I’menough lucky enough thattoI get to get paid watching and following football. getfor paid for watching and following football.
What isWhat yourisfavourite SwansSwans moment? your favourite moment? hat’s That’s a hardaone. we gotwe promoted to the to first division, I hardWhen one. When got promoted the first division, I wasn’twasn’t actually playingplaying with them it was moment actually with but them but ait fantastic was a fantastic moment s a supporter. I go back longatime club I actually as a supporter. I goaback longwith timethe with thebecause club because I actually used toused go down and train when Ivor Allchurch was was to go down andwith trainSwansea with Swansea when Ivor Allchurch playingplaying with them. I used Itoused get to released from Amman Valley Valley with them. get released from Amman Grammar SchoolSchool and I’dand go down and train It usedIttoused to Grammar I’d go down andwith trainthem. with them. be practice matches on a Tuesday. 1964 was my firstmy association be practice matches on a Tuesday. 1964 was first association with Swansea City, going down down to playtopractice matches with Ivor with Swansea City, going play practice matches with Ivor Allchurch who was a scholar and a gentleman Allchurch who was a scholar and a gentleman
Who isWho the best you have with inwith yourincareer? is theplayer best player youever haveplayed ever played your career? t’s a little of abit tough question there because of the of nature of the of beast the beast that that It’s abit little of a tough question there because the nature the and beast and the being beast being ou’veyou’ve got forwards and you’ve got defenders. Bob Latchford was a fantastic player,player, great finisher, a got forwards and you’ve got defenders. Bob Latchford was a fantastic great finisher, a gentleman and a mate well.asI played with him forhim both and Swansea. Joey Jones well,as well, gentleman and aas mate well. I played with forEverton both Everton and Swansea. Joey as Jones great character, not everyone’s cup ofcup tea but salt of salt the of earth, if you were the trenches you’d want great character, not everyone’s of tea but the earth, if youinwere in the trenches you’d want him next youto because he’d give John Mahoney at Swansea as well.asLeighton PhillipsPhillips too, hetoo, he himtonext you because he’d100%. give 100%. John Mahoney at Swansea well. Leighton was a great we played together for Wales was aplayer, great player, we played together for Wales
Best player against? Best player against? Probably Franz Beckenbauer, he scored againstagainst me when played for Wales in the centurion game.game. Probably Franz Beckenbauer, he scored me he when he played for Wales in the centurion antastic player,player, made the game justhe strolled through the game. Fantastic made the look gameeasy, lookhe easy, just strolled through the game.
What do youdo miss the Swans? What youabout miss about the Swans? look for thefor results but football is a young mans game you have move youon, have I look the results but football is a young mans and game and youtohave to on, move yougot have got oyaltyloyalty but loyalty doesn’tdoesn’t last forever because you goyou from club.toThe older will saywill say but loyalty last forever because goclub fromtoclub club. Thepayers older payers younger playersplayers aren’t as good theyaswere my day’ which of course is rubbish because the the ‘younger aren’t as as good theyinwere in my day’ which of course is rubbish because gamesgames changed. The camaraderie down down the vetch great I had aI few once from changed. The camaraderie the was vetch wasthere, great there, had spells a few there, spells there, once from chool,school, once after I then Iwent loan didn’t didn’t play very The other was oncecollege, after college, thenon went onthere, loan there, playwell verythough. well though. The one other one was when John was there. miss camaraderie but dobut I miss No,it? you’ve got to got move whenToshack John Toshack was You there. Youthe miss the camaraderie do it? I miss No, you’ve to on move on eally, really, that’s the past, did but itsbut timeitstotime move that’s thethat’s past, what that’sI what I did to on. move on.
Do youDo have hard towards the Swans? youany have anyfeelings hard feelings towards the Swans? Hard feelings? Gracious god no. Weno. were professional playersplayers to playtofor thatforparticular Hard feelings? Gracious god Wevery werelucky veryas lucky as professional play that particular lub, you doyou your and move club, dojob your job and on. move on. T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
Any funny stories? The difference between the players that play now and when we played was at least we had a laugh. They say that football is a funny old game but you don’t see many people laughing (with today’s players) and we used to have a laugh. We appreciated what we did, enjoyed what we did, good days, happy days, good memories and then we move on. Where will Swans finish this season? I was a little concerned to be honest with you when they lost the centre half back to Spurs, plus Joe Allen and Scott Sinclair. They lost three players who had good seasons and you can’t replace those over night. A new manager coming in as well but when Brendon came in I thought ‘I’m not too sure of him’ because he’d been to Reading and not lasted long. I think it’s a good move that Laudrup has kept Alan Curtis there, he knows the club, Swansea Jack through and through. I was concerned but they seem to have fallen on deaf ears with the good start but it’s a tough league and a long season. So far, so good. You were signed by Everton after just 12 games at the Swans, was it an easy decision and how did it come about? Well it wasn’t really my decision it was made for me by the managerial team, the manager at the time was Roy Bentley, he told me we’ve got an international goal keeper here called Tony Millington and he said we don’t really have a choice, we’ve got to sell you as most clubs in that league needed to do to balance the books. I’d only played 12 games and 1 Wales under 23 match, so I was bought on the back of that but I was very very inexperienced going to Everton even though I was 23. It wasn’t a very difficult decision for me as it was made for me. A Massive thanks to Dai for putting up with Matty for a while. I heard the interview back and Dai was brilliant, a real gentleman and a very knowledgeable bloke. Thanks again and the best of luck to you.
����S�A �I� Y FC� ��OF�I���L T�LE�����N ����N�L �S A������LE
AT ��W.�A�����N.CO.�K P�ea�� ��n�i�� Ja�� Sw�� ���� c�ntac��n� Go�
Ra�� t� Pl���� � ��� Ye��
It’s early days but here is who have impressed in the first three games of the season.
Wayne Routledge Who’d have thunk it? He was fine last season when he played without ever looking like a top-class player. Another month or two like this and there will be England talks. I can’t understand why we wasted so many minutes on Rosy Webster’s boyfriend last year while we had this gem warming the bench. We had a rubbish manager then you see. Wayne looks lighting with more tricks to his bow than Dyer and Sinclair combined plus a goal already this season and countless assists. I was so close to putting him in Fantasy Football team when Sinclair refused to sign contract too. Gutted I didn’t now. It would be criminal and poor management if he made way for Hernandez for the Villa game, don’t drop a man on form. He’s had a chance in the first team and he’s taken it. Keep it going..........
Michu To think we were going to spend £5 million more on Siggy. The guy looks class, strong, quick, quick feet, creative, good eye for a pass, great finish, top movement and good in the air. He looks like buy of the season at just £2 million. 4 goals in 3 games, he must be thinking what the fuss was about with this premiership malarkey. We’re already very dependant on him, like we was with Siggy last season. You wonder how we would do should he be out for a few games. It wouldn’t surprise me too much if he does a bit of ‘Chico time’ on the sidelines this season, a bit of bite to him, which we like.
Angel Rangel I don’t know whether the influx of Spaniards has lifted him even more but the player who boasts the greatest name in world football has a spring in his step and it’s carried onto the pitch. A goal to cap it all off, another one blocked off the line against Sunderland and as ever solid at the back. Our wingers more central role has meant that it’s been up to our full backs to offer the width at times and I don’t think Angel takes too much encouragement to push on forward. He loves his football at the moment and he’s had a fantastic start to the season. Keep it up. Special Mention - Vorm He made a save against QPR which I thought was a cert for save of the year before Friedel’s heroics v Norwich. He also made a wonder save against West Ham but as with Ash, the problem with playing so close to your own goal is that any mistake gets well publicised and in this league you get punished. Not his best game v Sunderland, just didn’t look at the races. We still love you very very much though. Please remember that.
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
Target Aerials Supply, installation, upgrading & repair Specialising in both terrestrial and satellite digital TV systems
Special Offers on NOW!! We provide installation, maintenance and upgrade service locally in the Swansea area. If you would like more information or a quote regarding this, you can call on 01792 472282
Visit Target Aerials (Swansea) Ltd today 92 Neath Road, Hafod, Swansea, SA1 2HW.
Call us on 01792 472 282 27
oving on to the price... what can I say. £45 for a home ticket. It's ridiculous. To clarify, the £45 is for Category A games (including Man City, Man Utd, Chelsea, Arsenal, Liverpool and Spurs), while Category B games (I'm assuming these are somehow unimportant games?!) are £35. Just shy of £50 for a fan to watch their team against one of these 'big' clubs is everything that is wrong with football these days. Naturally it's not just Swansea, but the club are now revealing their nastier side and distancing themselves from the fans with this move.
�� C��i� C��r�
blog like this isn't going to get anyone saying “you know what, players are paid too much - let's cut the wages and give something back to the fans”. Still, it's worth mentioning. One day Premier League clubs will price their fans out of the stadium. Empty seats galore reminiscent of the Six Nations or the Euros. Then again, fans will go to any lengths - pay any price - to get tickets to see their club. We're stupid I guess. It's not just me annoyed with this increase. Here are a selection of tweets I received from fellow fans following the announcement of the £45 ticket:
The simple way to look at it is: the average guy in Swansea is finding it hard - unemployment, higher cost of living, recession... it's all a bit gloomy. Football is one of the things that can help ease that stress - it allows a fan to have a pint with their mates, cheer on their team and forget about life for a few hours. However, jacking the price up £10 for these already expensive prime games is greedy. It's at least a day's wages for some people.
“At least relegation has a silver lining now: we get to actually see a game! I saw QPR & Fulham away in the oppositions stands...”
I am well aware that Swansea are not owned by Johnny Oil-tycoon and need to raise money somehow, but as one fan pointed out, even if all six of the Category A games sell out, including away fans, the club will net an extra £270k over the season. This is nothing in Premier League terms
“Think they have forgotten we are in a recession.”
Is that extra money worth upsetting - even excluding - the loyal fans? It's barely enough to pay wages for a few weeks. The fans are the only ones who are suffering. It's now the case of “if you are lucky enough to find a ticket to a Swans home match, can you even afford it?” Think of the silly money that players are paid. I could write thousands of words on the problems of money and football, but it's pointless - it will depress us all and won't change anything. I know a
“Chris, chances are I'll get to see 3 or 4 games max this season. £45 for a Swansea ticket is shocking no matter the opposition. The club has lost touch with their fan base. Especially the ones they'll call on if the PL dream turns sour.”
“The new system is clearly designed to make having a season ticket v attractive (ground expansion in mind). £45 is a lot tho!” “I think at £45 we are turning into a boutique club a la QPR. It was 1/6d or 7.5p when I first paid to see Swans!” Soon it will be the case that the only people who can afford to watch football are... well, footballers. Thank god for illegal Armenian cable hook-ups eh? This article was originally published in July 2012 on www.ForzaSwansea.com.
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� c�ntac� 07974 0��529
e c n a r Clea OUTLET
UNIT 2 PHOENIX BUSINESS PARK SWANSEA SA7 9FZ Tel: 01792 701293
FREE UNDERLAY ON ALL CARPETS OVER £50*
100s OF CARPETS AND VINYL REMNANTS* We will match ANY quotation on a like for like basis and guarantee all our fitting for 12 months. *WHEN YOU BRING THIS ADVERT
T� A����i�� �� Ja�� Sw�� C�ntac� 07974 0��529
QUOTE JACK SWAN Aerials & Satelittes
J.V.Davies Painters & Decorators Ltd EST 1987
Installation, Maintenance and Repair to Aerials & Digital Satellites Free Quotations on New Aerials Repairs - Free Call Out Price Promise - Pay Less & No VAT
Cockett, Swansea, SA2 0GB
Tel: 01792 205483 Fax: 01792 298425 Mob: 07885 653488
Builder isher • • • •
Specialists in Single & Double Extensions Garage & Loft Conversions Conservatories • Fibre Glass Roofing 1st Class Plastering Team
Fisher & Roberts
Dragon Drains 24hr Emergency Call Out NO CHARGE
01792 561522 / 07888 071570 07976 551913 / 07875 990965
Rodding Jetting Insurance Claims CCTC Groundowork/Pipe Laying Jet Washing
01639 730224 • 07866 571033 www.fisherandroberts.co.uk
Radford & Mercer Carpentry & Building Services EST 1985
All carpentry and building work undertaken. Doors, Fire Doors, Hard Wood, Skirtings, Period Work, Insurance Work, Decking, 1st & 2nd Fix, All work carried out to a high standard. Cut Roof Specialist PUB BENCHES AND PICNIC TABLES
Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Web: www.masterstonemasonsouthwales.co.uk / google russellmercercarpentry&buildingservices Phone: 01792 446306 / 07973 964722 / 07919 450719
Cleaning 0845 678 9972
Dry Lining, Taper & Jointing 30 Years Experience
Stuart Read 07905 825867 Ross Moulton Electrical
for all your domestic electrical installations
Electrician UNIT 2 PHOENIX BUSINESS PARK SWANSEA SA7 9FZ Tel: 01792 701293
Services Provided Extra Power Points Extra Lighting New Circuit Installations Extensions Kitchens Outhouses Electric Showers Re-Wires Fault Findings and much more!
FREE QUOTE NO JOB TOO SMALL
01639 845184 / 07810 357335 / email@example.com
When you’re doing any work on your house or garden, please support
Fencing West Glamorgan Fencing t t t t t t
-BOETDBQF%FWFMPQFST (SPVOEXPSLhT $MPTF#PBSE'FODJOH (BUFT"OE8BMMT %FDLJOH 1BWJOH1BUJPT
We Clear your Invasive Plants and Carry Out Ground Maintenanc Weed control Ground Maintenance Landscape Ground Maintenance
Tiling Slating Fibre Glass & Building Works
Tel: 07964 711354 Come on the Swans!!!!! Structual Engineer
Weed Control Hard and Soft Landscaping Landscaping Design Paving & Patios Planting
Unit 9, Crofty Industrial Estate Crofty, Swansea, SA4 3RS Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Web: www.baylandscapesltd.co.uk
Tree Work Hedge and Grass Cutting Walling & Fencing Remove Invasive plants like Japanese Knotweed For more information call 01792 355 576 / 07971 496586
We Clear your Invasive Plants and Carry Out Ground Maintenanc Weed control Ground 1st Class Plastering qtr landscape.ai 1 22/05/2012 10:33:14 Maintenance Landscape
YOUR st Class Plastering ADVERT HERE Steve Coupe JUST £20 PER ISSUE 07973 856145 / 01792 578677 CALL 07974 055529 15 Years Experience
All Internal & External Plastering Undertaken
Plumber Covering All Aspects of Plumbing Fires Boilers Installations Breakdowns & Repairs Landlord Safety Full Bathroom Refurbishment including Tiling
Fully Insured Free Estimates
PJ PlumbingFriendly & Reliable Service
All Work Fully Guarenteed
01639 841873 / 07894 744626 email@example.com
HourglassWales Replacement And Repair Of Misted Or Cracked Sealed Units In Windows And Doors With Over 14 Years Experience We Are Qualified In All Aspects Of Double Glazing Replacement & Repair, Undertaken Quickly And Professionally
The solution is clear
Why not call us for a free no obligation quote
Contact 01269 825 999 / Fax 01269 824482