CONFESSIONS OF A WONDER WOMAN: WHAT IT TAKES TO FUEL MY INVISBILE JET
MATTER emPOWERing women from the inside out
MINE, YOURS AND OURS:
MAKING BLENDED FAMILIES WORK
APRON & STI ETTOS
KEEPING IT SEXY IN THE KITCHEN
FINISH FIerce 2014 WINTER ISSUE WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
emPOWERing women from the inside out Greetings Radikals and welcome to the 1st quarter of 2014! I don‘t know about you. But I‘m BEYOND ready to LIVE the dreams that have been promised to me. After all the dreaming, sacrificing, WAITING and MORE WAITNG, being obedient, watching and more WAITING…get the picture? I‘m READY! Breathing…. Here‘s the kicker, we‘re right there and somehow, we have to wait just a little while longer while EVERYTHING seemingly goes in slow motion. BREATHE with me. We‘re close and it‘s tiring, but don‘t give up now. There‘s this thing called ‗patience‘ that has the potential to frustrate me at times. I realize I exercise it in some areas of my life but become INTENSELY impatient in other areas. 2014 is full of promises and opportunities and I‘ve set my mind on BE EASY mode. Although I have turned up the notch to become more aggressive about my passions and making my voice be heard, I purposely refuse to allow myself to get on any emotional rollercoaster rides. They literally make me sick with chest pains, heart palpitations, and difficulty breathing to the extent the doctors can‘t find a diagnosis. Nurses are the worst patients and we tend to diagnose ourselves, which is exactly what I did. I even prescribed me own medication: LAUGHTER! I take it 4 times a day and as often as needed in between doses. Laughter changes the intensity of the atmosphere and allows you the necessary break to relax your mind before you re-engage. Laughter will save your life and the life of others who like to tap dance on your last nerve. The pressure during this stage of WAITING for things that you‘ve been believing for can get intense, but don‘t lose focus. Deal with situations accordingly, not allowing a snowball to turn into an avalanche. You can dodge the snowball but the pressure of the emotional avalanche will take too much valuable time to dig out of. Breathe. Pace yourself and let‘s take this world by storm!
Editor-in-chief Shirelle DIAMOND Hogans
DIVA, you have once again outdone yourself! iMatter Magazine is captivating, classy, and current. From the informative articles to the exquisite layout, this work of art--both literary and visual--definitely leads the pack. You've got a winner!!! Congratulations! ---N. Fitzhugh Wells
Read SHARP EDGES, women aren’t the only ones that feel that way. A man that’s been hurt before deals with the same issues. ---Fred F.
I loved the Fashion Sense article. I was reminded to stop looking at outside beauty and focus on the beauty within myself. ---D.G.
Just finished reading iMatter...love the idea! Congratulations!---M. Austin
RELEVANT!!! From start to finish!
The name alone spoke to me! ---M. Johnson
I realized I didn’t know what my credit score was this year. With the information and resources provided, I was able to complete the process for my husband and I in less than 10minutes . ---Jackie N
We appreciate your feedback! 1) Visit www.radikalpublications.com, 2) Download your free copy of iMATTER Magazine 3) Leave your comments on the website! You just might be quoted in our next issue!
The relationship piece hit home, had me thinking, “Who went and told this girl my business!” ---V. Gray
WHAT’S INSIDE DIAMONDS & PEARLS
RIP THE RUNWAY of LIFE
MINE, YOURS AND OURS: 59 MAKING BLENDED FAMILIES WORK
FINISH FIerce 32 51
WOMEN IN BUSINESS
SHARP EDGES: Learning to LOVE AGAIN after painful relationships…
Contributors DENISE GILLIAM | KEVIN CARR | EBONY MADDREY | DENNIS SPENCE TINESAR FORREST | GREGORY JERVEY | LECHEELE JACKSON LYNETTE APPLING | STAJAY FITNESS | YVETE ALLEN TATUM M. TONITA AUSTIN | TAMARA SHIRER | UTOKIA LANGLEY VENUS WILSON | MICHAEL HILL | SHARVETTE MITCHELL | TIFFANY EDMONDS | NORISSA G. HOWARD | DELORES R. GARVIN
FINALLY OVER M. Tonita Austin ÂŠ Jan 9, 1985 When I lost you I found myself and I hurt I pained for too long thinking of how foolish I had been to believe in you But my hurt turned into poetry and dance and I wrote and danced until I filled up the emptiness inside of me The void that set inside my soul when you were no longer there Poetry about you and for myself poured from my fingertips like golden rum at Carnival time in Trinidad I loved until I stopped hurting and I found not only myself but someone to love me for real And oh yes there were times when I wished he were you until constant caresses and truthful sighs showed me that true love takes me for what I am Yes it is finally over. Real love has rescued my weary soul and you are just a faded memory because I am no longer afraid to return the love that I have been given
www.tonitalove.com. Twitter is: tonitalove IG: mstonitalove
Diamonds & Pearls ™ When? Who? How? But no seriously……. WHEN?!!!!! How many times a day do these questions run through your mind? Sitting at your desk, reminding yourself of your age, doodling your name and your potential Bo‘s last name together, wondering if he is THE ONE??? A girl can drive herself crazy and if you‘re not careful, you can easily find yourself chasing the ring and throw a blind eye to requirements of the covenant. How many times have you overlooked the warning signs that this is NOT the person I should be with? Hoping and wishing things get better, they‘ll change their behavior eventually and generally making excuses for their shortcomings to your standards. Yes ladies, your standards. The ones that are compromised for someone with potential, depending on how lonely you are feeling or what holiday is approaching, Sometimes us ladies settle for ANYbody vs having NObody.
Although there are many more reasons why you should say I DON‘T to a relationship and potential marriage, we decided to start with a few basics. Walking away from a potential mate doesn‘t have to be associated with negative emotions when you are confident about what it is you desire. Settling for less than what you deserve only delays the hurt you strategically tried to manipulate. ‗Dodging the bullet‖ now will save you from the heartache later. Especially when you have to admit to yourself AFTER THE FACT that you knew it wouldn‘t work from the beginning. How many times have we done that? I‘m positive more times than we are willing to acknowledge. Here‘s a question to ponder on that we will address in the next issue—WHY? Evaluate your current relationship and if you‘re not currently in one, prepare yourself. Knowledge is power. WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
Knowing your identity and worth is the foundation of a healthy life that lends to healthy relationships. Not just anyone that comes along and shows interest should have the privilege to be your ―better half.‖ Being prepared for whomever your mate is starts with you being complete, not broken. Waiting for someone to complete you is a disaster waiting to happen. You deserve 100% of your mate and he deserves 100% of you. While being single, take the time to discover you. Whether starting your business or getting your education, be productive about your life. I‘m sure you‘ve discovered having a ―boo‖ doesn‘t fulfill you. Being with the wrong person for the right reasons has the potential to kill you slowly.
As a child I can remember sitting in front of the television watching Wonder Woman who was one of the only female superheroine‘s out at the time. I more so recently looked up her profile and it read that she had an alter ego and a list of abilities that included but were not limited to: super strength speed indestructible magical healing power agility endurance stamina and a fighter for peace, love, and justice. She sounds like many of the women that I know; myself included. She took care of home and the community. She was everywhere that she was needed or called to be. She made her job look so seamless. She would set out to save the world that was before her. Wonder Woman was one of the first icons that young girls were exposed to. Back then I had no way of knowing that most females possessed the same innate abilities as this lady in her fabulous costume and tiara. As I was transformed into being the Wonder Woman of my home I began to find that it came naturally and many times as women we fall into roles that we never deemed imaginable or roles that we unwillingly or circumstantially fell into. Who in their right mind signs up to do things alone? Who signs up to be a single parent? Who knows exactly what you‘re signing up for when you agree to be of assistance to someone? Well let me tell you…. being stretched in so many directions and never getting a break seems to be the norm in today‘s WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
society. Women, because we make it look so easy and rarely complain, then know one whether male or female give us a pass at making excuses not to make something happen. When we so readily put on our capes and head out to save the world. A typical day for me, well actually it‘s never really typical. I just tend to go with the flow. So let‘s start with last night: • • • • • •
• • • • • • • • • • • •
Get home from work after working ten hours; the kids left the dog out of the cage. Feces on the floor a scarf chewed to bits, and a pair of pumps that are unrecognizable. Prepare dinner while assisting with homework for my 4th grader, feeding my 7 month old, and yelling to my 15 year old to take the trash out. Dinner‘s done. No time to breathe. Prepare bath water to bathe the baby, story time, and last feeding. After telling my 9 year old to get in the shower for the 5th time she finally does it. Phone ringing back to back, unable and unwilling to answer as I just can‘t take in one more thing. The house is finally quieted around 10:30 only to sleep for two hours and to be back up nursing. Now I am up writing unable to sleep afterwards. Finally, dozing off around 4 a.m. Only to be awakened by the alarm buzzing at 5:45 a.m.; simply to do it all over again.
This is just a glimpse of what goes on in my household. Yes, I am the divorced mother of three who takes on the daily challenges of motherhood alone. I absolutely, did not sign up to do this thing by myself, but it happened. My day job is very demanding, given that I work with families who are having a hard time managing their children‘s behaviors. Most of the time, I‘m looking at these families saying, ―You know that I know exactly what you‘re dealing with!‖ I too am going through it. But all they want is for me to fix their children and to make their chaotic households peaceful. They could care less about what I walk into when I leave them in the evening or what I‘m walking away from when they see me in the morning. Day in and day out, I am drained from pouring every ounce of me into the work that I do just to get home and have to be recharged to go full force in my own stuff. I shared with someone that often times I feel like Wonder Woman. I put on my cape and do a couple of spins just to take off in my invisible jet. No one ever sees my jet or what it takes to fuel it so that it is constantly able to come and go; all they see is the outcome of the things that I do. Fix it; Fix this, and Fix that. They have no idea of the amount of pressure that I/we are under in fixing things and packaging it so pretty that you‘re constantly called upon.
When I say we, I mean women, mothers, sisters, aunts, daughters, grandmothers, writers, counselors, engineers, CEO‘s, lawyers, doctors, child care workers, and the list goes on. We are given one of the most challenging tasks on this planet. It is the challenge of being everything to everybody and at times having no one to be anything to us. We feel the constant push from our husbands, our bosses, our children and society. Given that we are equipped to maneuver so effortlessly, those directly and indirectly associated with us continue to tug and pull at our very being. There are days when you absolutely just want to pull your hair out. Of course, the people who are putting the demand on you chastise you when you complain of being tired. When you have that little crease across your forehead they tell you to smile. They rarely ask if you‘re o.k. and when they do they‘re not listening to your response. When you say that you need a break or a vacation and actually pull it off to make it happen, then they are constantly calling your phone or flooding your email with demands. The character trait of multitasking is universal when it comes to women. The demands put upon women are not discriminatory. It doesn‘t matter what walk of life you come from, what ethnicity, or social class, as a women it is expected that you will handle whatever situation is presented before you. I say that Wonder Woman has earned and will continue to earn her stripes in this high profile, high demand, high expectation, no holds bar role of simply being born a female. Then the question is posed…. Would we have it any other way? Probably not; the saying goes that behind every strong man is an even stronger woman. I say that women are strong whether they are behind a man or in front of a man. Women are strong because we have to be. Women are strong by strategic design.
As I stated earlier Wonder Woman was an alter ego just as she has become my alter ego. I leave you with the comfort of knowing that you are not alone in this quest to do your call of duty in fixing the things presented before you. I encourage you to take those time outs and to put on the mute button or the silencer on the phone, to step away from the computer, and to take breaks from work, home, your husband, and the kids. Allow yourself to recharge so that you can breathe and debrief from the day to day hustles of life. You will always be Wonder Woman no matter how hard you try to separate yourself from it. It‘s a part of who you were created to be. You were created to be a woman who does exceedingly and abundantly beyond what the mind could ever imagine. -Ebony Maddrey
That’s the Wonder in front of Women.
StayJay Fitness |www.stayjayfitness.com Add BALANCE to the Core of Your Fitness Resolutions
By Stacy Julien
limming down, building muscle and eating healthier all tend to top the list of fitness resolutions every year. Improving balance? Not so much. It‘s not the sexiest of goals. You certainly can‘t flaunt your balance walking down the street! But believe it or not, it‘s the must-have quality that helps you do everything better – including building a sixpack. Here are four reasons why you should include ―better balance‖ in your 2014 goals:
SAVES YOU ACHES AND PAINS Improving your balance keeps you upright. As we get older and are more prone to slips and falls, this is especially important. Balance is also beneficial to fans of high-intensity training or Plyometrics. How you land on your feet makes all the difference. Try This: Lunge Jumps
YOUR A powerful core includes your mid-section and back, two areas of your body you want to be able to withstand functional movements (picking up a heavy box, or example). In addition, the stronger your core, the more endurance you have with your ab workouts. Try This: Side Plank or Side Plank with Leg Lift
© ALYSCIA CUNNINGHAM PHOTOGRAPHY
FINISH FIerce For most people, 2013 came in with both barrels blazing, attempting to destroy our dreams. Shirelle DIAMOND Hogans, Editor in Chief of iMATTER Magazine, and Dell Scott, CEO of Divacoutoure, joined forces to celebrate 10 divas who dared to pursue their dreams in the face of adversity.
www.radikalpublications.com | www.divacoutoure.com
FINISH FIerce Nina fitzhugh wells ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ My greatest obstacle this year has been with battling Pulmonary Sarcoidosis, a chronic and aggressively debilitating lung disease. Though I have struggled with this disease for the past 5 years, 2013 it progressed to the point of having to be hospitalized twice. Once at the beginning of the year for six weeks with Congestive Heart Failure and later for complications from catching a life-threatening blood disease (MRSA). As if that weren't enough, I was told by my Pulmonologist in February that if my condition did not improve, or at least stabilize, I would only have 2 years max to live. So within a few years, I went from being a preaching, teaching, on-the-go entrepreneur for the Lord, to being on oxygen 24 hours a day and having to depend on others to help me get around and care for my personal needs. While each of these challenges were quite difficult to hear and bear, my greatest obstacle to overcome was my weakening faith. Each day while laying in the hospital bed, I questioned God while at the same time professing loudly that I trusted Him. I was constantly contradicting myself and my belief in the ONE who had so many times brought me through. The enemy had convinced me, a minister and evangelist, that I had let God down because of my lack of faith and because of that, I was being made to suffer. I battled my health issues, depression, fear, self-pity and now, lacking faith. I was ready to give up, literally.
FINISH FIerce It was not until after some pastor friends of mine came to the hospital consistently and fed my spirit that I was able to build my faith back up to the point that I started truly professing with belief and strong faith that I AM HEALED. ~PASSION TO PURSUE~ Although I allowed my faith to loosen for a time, God did not loosen his hold and calling on my life. In the midst of my obstacles, He placed it on my heart to reach out and help others who were struggling with challenges of their own. God pointed me to the Foster Youth who, like me, were raised by the state welfare system. He appointed me to raise awareness about what they have gone through and to advocate for them to have a better start in their adult lives. Once I grabbed hold to my faith again, God gave me something to LIVE for. He gave me new hope, vision and promise.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ Through the continued strengthening of my faith, I have been able to accomplish many great things... not for myself or my own fame or fortune, but for the uplifting of those less fortunate and those who need to know HIM in a greater way. As well, He's given me new, creative ideas and inventions to enhance the work I have already done. In August 2013, I started the Revelation for Elevation Radio Show which is purposed to raise awareness about the plight of youth who age out of the Foster Care system. It is a weekly show that features a diverse group of guests who share experiences, resources and information to help former foster youth as they transition from state support to self-sufficiency. In December 2013, the doors of Excel HIGHER, Inc., a non-profit organization, opened and immediately began rendering services to help aged-out foster youth who are pursuing higher education. In addition to our year-long initiatives, we will be starting our capital campaign to build "The Excel House" an independent living home for select former foster youth to have a place to live when the university dormitories are closed for the holidays or summer vacation. My book publishing company, Kingdom Publishing Group, inc. (KPG), continues to flourish. Since opening our doors in 1999, we have been blessed to help nearly 300 authors get their Godinspired work out to the world. Though I have chosen to take on a smaller client base, God has not failed to continuously flow His best writers and authors our way. Look for our 2014 Ready For The World Writer's Conference next year! www.kingdompublishing.org www.excelhigher.org, www.ninafitzhughwells.com
YOUR It‘s stability as well as endurance and power that will help you keep up with, say, a Shaun T workout. Having the coordination and ability to perform quick-moving drills will get you to your goals faster and improve athletic skills. Also, lifting heavy weights or doing multi-muscle moves all require good balance. Try This:
BOOST YOUR BRAINPOWER Studies have shown that balance training, including complex movements in your workout, forces your brain to work harder. Keep building on those cognitive skills! Try This: Single-Leg Squats Improve your balance in no time by always including one to two core-challenging exercises in your workouts. The ones mentioned above are a good start. A beginner‘s Pilates or yoga class would also help. Again, ―improved balance‖ may not be the hot fitness goal for 2014, but it‘s an amazing skill that you‘ll come to depend on in your workout regimen and (more importantly) your life regimen.
StayJay Fitness Boom! Body 5-Minute CORE Routine
www.stayjayfitness.com https://www.facebook.com/StayjayFitness WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
Have a Happy and Healthy 2014!
GOD HAS ANSWERED BY M. Tonita Austin
It‘s so amazing when you can look back on the major events in your life and see where God has not necessarily answered your exact prayer, but gave you exactly what you needed. I wanted so desperately to have another boy. My son was so easy-going, mild-tempered, played happily by himself, ate whatever I put in front of him, weaned himself off of me before the age of one and was willing and excited to go anywhere and do anything I suggested. He was such a bright and happy kid and definitely a momma‘s boy. I wanted another just like him! When they told me (because I could never be one of those women who find out the sex of the baby on the operating table) at the ultrasound that it was a girl, I almost cried. I felt so disappointed. I knew what a handful I was as a young girl, and how much I resisted whatever my mom said was the ―right thing to do‖ when I was a tween, and I was not ready for the challenge. I wasn‘t ready to release the boxes and boxes of beautifully preserved boys clothing that I had so carefully packed away in anticipation, and did not want to paint the nursery pink or buy all new pink fluffy clothing. I grew up in a houseful of boys – three brothers and a mass of their close friends whom I considered my ―play‖ brothers. I knew how boys thought, what their interests were and was comfortable being around them.
What was I going to do with a girl?? My friends and family were all excited that we would have the ―rich man‘s family – one boy and one girl. They all told me that I would love having a daughter, that one day we‘d enjoy laughter over manicures, tea cups and pretend cookies and that we would be the best of friends. If it weren‘t for the close relationship I had with my mom, I would not have believed a word they said. But my mind still went fast forward to her teenage years where I saw us fighting all the time and her sneaking out the bedroom window to run away with some foolish boy. After all I had nausea the entire nine months I carried her and it couldn‘t have been a more miserable pregnancy. I thought, ―this is not going to be good‖, and secretly hoped the ultrasound was wrong. But God knew best. This pregnancy came after suffering three miscarriages within a two-year period, and yet I still considered trying again. I wanted to give my son a sibling. The specialists we saw couldn‘t find any reason for the lost babies and I started to think maybe my Creator was telling me that it was just not in the plan. The doctors suggested I try again. I prayed to God and asked for a miracle. Another positive pregnancy test. I made a deal with God that if this embryo did not survive, I would accept that God‘s plan for my life was to just have one child and I would
GOD HAS ANSWERED BY M. Tonita Austin not try again. My next ultrasound confirmed the pregnancy, yet the visit several weeks later presented us with potentially devastating news. They saw a blood clot right by the embryo and there was a high possibility that I would miscarry. I spent the next week on bed rest, and in prayer. My prayers were about to be answered one way or another, and I wanted to have the strength to handle the outcome. By the next ultrasound the clot had disappeared. There was no trace of it. The ultrasound technician was dumbfounded; the doctor said it was a miracle and I couldn‘t hold back the tears. As soon as I got home, I looked up names for the little baby girl growing in my womb. I had already chosen her middle name, but I searched for a name by meaning. I wasn‘t sure what name it would return, but I knew what I wanted her name to mean. My eye was drawn to the name Janai (Jah-nay). Janai means ―God has answered‖. I surrendered and accepted and held strongly to my faith. Absolutely God had answered. Not my prayer for a boy, but I was rewarded for my faith. My God! I am writing this so that when she‘s spending way too much time in the shower, or dating some boy I don‘t approve of, or just plain giving me more grey hairs, I will read this again, take a deep breath, hold her in my arms and as I did the morning she was born and cherish the beautiful gift I was given when God answered. I hope it works!
"Just a Little Thank You Note" @ WCL in Delaware http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3MfTPfJhbW4&feature=youtu.be
M. Tonita Austin www.tonitalove.com. Twitter is: tonitalove IG: mstonitalove
Assorted Colors and Sizes Available at: www.radikalpublications.com
Featured Chef: Utokia Langley
Chef Utokia Langley
SHE’S GOT FLAVOR!
How did you get started cooking? I‘ve been cooking since I was tall enough to reach the stove and learned most of my techniques and recipes from my Mother and Grandmother. I started my blog in 2010 after years of cooking and entertaining for friends and family who asked for my recipes. I decided it was time to share all this good food love with the world. I love the virtual environment because it allows me to touch people all over the world. I‘ve had messages from Canada, Germany, Nigeria and so many other place all thanking me for sharing my recipes. I am so humbled to be in their kitchens touching them virtually and bringing joy to their world, even if only for that food moment.
Why do you love what you do? I love to cook because food has the ability to create memories, it has the ability to conjure up smiles and bond friends and families. Sharing this with the world just spreads all this innocent love and that makes me warm. My only regret is that I didn‘t start my blog sooner. I feel like I could do this forever!
Where has your passion has taken you? My passion to cook and share with the world has given me life lessons. I have grown as a person, a business woman and I‘ve met so many good hearted people, both in person and virtually. It has taught me true dedication and discipline; blogging is hard work! It has also afforded me the opportunity to be on National TV on Dr. Oz and The Chew. I‘ve also been in a National Campaign, Reynolds Real Moms where I had to compete to gain the title. As a Reynolds Real Mom, I was featured in National Magazines like Better Homes and Gardens, Everyday with Rachael Ray and Parents. I‘ve also become a better cook (because of all the testing that goes into the recipes), I‘ve learned how to better my food presentation and food photography. Everyday is a great day when you can do what you love and learn at the same time.
In what way does your profession empower women? My hope is that I inspire women to follow their dreams. I hope I inspire them to work hard and to be patience because most success stories did not happen overnight. I hope I inspire women to love themselves and to be confident. My goal is to support as many women as I can and to be a reflection of where they can go if they just put their minds and actions in the right place. I am also an advocate for Enchanting Women Foundation (http://www.enchanting-women.com/), they provide services to battered women and disadvantaged teenage girls.
What makes you unique? I am unique because I am me. This is what I try to teach my daughter and what I hope all women feel about themselves. As women we have the ability to do anything, be anything and accomplish whatever we want. I am unique because I stay true to myself, I love myself and I live my life giving more than I take. Connect with Utokia: www.shesgotflavor.com firstname.lastname@example.org http://www.facebook.com/shesgotflavor http://www.twitter.com/shesgotflavor http://www.pinterest.com/shesgotflavor http://www.instagram.com/shesgotflavor https://plus.google.com/u/0/+UtokiaLangley/posts
Creamy Roasted Butternut Squash Soup with Lump Crab 22
CHEESY BUTTERY BROILED SHRIMP INGREDIENTS: 1 2lb. bag of uncooked Large or Jumbo shrimp ½ cup Monterey and Colby Jack Cheese 1-2 tsp. Extra Virgin Olive Oil 1/4 cup lemon juice 1 stick melted unsalted butter 2-4 tsp. crushed garlic ¼ cup finely chopped spring/green onions 2-4 tsp. sea salt 1-2 tsp. ground black pepper READY, SET GO: Turn broiler on to high Rinse shrimp, peel and remove tails Add shrimp to a bowl and add extra virgin olive oil, melted butter, lemon juice, crushed garlic, spring/green onions, sea salt and ground black pepper, fold until incorporated Line a baking pan with Reynolds Wrap® Non-Stick Foil and add shrimp to pan (including all butter, seasoning and onions), make sure shrimp are spread out and not on top of each other Broil for 6 minutes Remove from broiler and sprinkle cheese all over shrimp, place back in broiler for 1-2 minutes or until cheese is melted ENJOY, INDULDGE AND BE HAPPY! Utokia ~ Sizzle Sizzle Baby WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
SPICY ORANGE MARMALADE PORK BABY BACK PORK RIBS INGREDIENTS: 2 slab of pork baby back pork ribs 2 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil to rub ribs (plus 2 tbsp. extra virgin olive oil for roasting pan) 1 tbsp. sea salt ¼ tbsp. ground black pepper ½ tbsp. dried thyme 1 tbsp. garlic powder
SPICY ORANGE MARMALADE SAUCE INGREDIENTS: ½ stick unsalted butter 2 cups orange marmalade 1 cup cream sherry ½ tbsp. sriracha for mild (1 ½ for spicy) 1 tbsp. apple cider vinegar ½ tbsp. sea salt ¼ cup brown sugar WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
READY, SET, GO: Preheat oven to 325 degrees Thoroughly clean ribs, pat dry and remove membrane (thin layer of skin) from back of ribs Rub ribs with extra virgin olive oil and season on both sides with sea salt, ground black pepper, dried thyme and garlic powder Add extra virgin olive oil to a large heavy bottom roasting pan or dutch oven pan (that has a cover) over high heat and sear ribs on both sides – 5-7 minutes on each side
LET’S MAKE THE SPICY ORANGE MARMALADE SAUCE – in medium sauce pan over medium heat melt butter, once butter is melted, add in orange marmalade, cream sherry, sriracha, apple cider vinegar, sea salt and brown sugar – cook for 3-6 minutes (whisking every 2 minutes or so) Pour ¾ spicy orange marmalade sauce over ribs, place cover on roasting pan/dutch oven pan, put in oven and allow to braise for 1 hour and 30 minutes After one hour and 30 minutes uncover and baste ribs with remaining spicy orange marmalade sauce and continue to braise in oven uncovered for an additional 8-10 minutes until sauce is sticky and caramelized but be careful not to burn Remove ribs from oven and allow to rest in pan 5-10 minutes, then transfer ribs to cutting board, cut into pieces in between 1-2 bones and baste ribs with sauce left in the roasting pan right before serving Utokia ~ Sizzle Sizzle Baby
Cake • • • • • • • •
2 cups cake flour 2 teaspoons baking powder 1/2 teaspoon salt 1/2 cup butter, softened 1 cup sugar 3 large eggs, room temperature 2 teaspoons vanilla 3/4 cup milk DIRECTIONS Mix butter, sugar, eggs, vanilla, and milk. Add dry ingredients last mixing cake batter until smooth. Place batter into two round cake pans or 1 bundt cake Bake 40 minutes or until done
Banana Pudding • • • • •
Whip Cream 3 cups of heavy whipping cream 3 tbsp. of vanilla flavor ½ cup of sugar DIRECTIONS Combine ingredients into a bowl/mixer and whip until it peaks. Layer the cake with filling, dress cake with whip cream and place vanilla wafers around the cake. Place sliced almonds on top for decoration!
2 Lg boxes of vanilla pudding 4 fresh ripened bananas ½ cup of rum 1 stick of butter ½ cup of brown sugar DIRECTIONS Cook pudding and cool in refrigerator until stiff Sautee butter, brown sugar, bananas, with a pinch of cinnamon & nutmeg until ingredient caramelizes. Add rum, and simmer for 3 minutes on medium. Let it cool and mix with vanilla pudding mixture. Venus C. Wilson, Frederica, DE Layer filling into the cake and dress with whip cream
Degree: Pastry Chef/Johnson & Wales, Providence, RI Contact Info: Planetvenus@rocketmail.com /302-382-7479
INGREDIENTS 2 cups all-purpose flour 2 cups sugar 3/4 cup cocoa 2 teaspoons baking powder 1 1/2 teaspoons baking soda 1 teaspoon salt 1 teaspoon espresso powder 1 cup milk 1/2 cup vegetable oil 2 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 1 cup boiling water
• • •
Add flour, sugar, cocoa, baking powder, baking soda, salt and espresso powder to a large bowl or the bowl of a stand mixer. Whisk through to combine or, using your paddle attachment, stir through flour mixture until combined well. Add milk, vegetable oil, eggs, and vanilla to flour mixture and mix together on medium speed until well combined. Reduce speed and carefully add boiling water to the cake batter. Beat on high speed for about 1 minute to add air to the batter. Distribute cake batter evenly between the two prepared cake pans. Bake for 30-35 minutes, until a toothpick or cake tester inserted in the center comes out clean. Remove from the oven and allow to cool for about 10 minutes, remove from the pan and cool completely. Frost cake with Chocolate Frosting. Venus C. Wilson, Frederica, DE
Degree: Pastry Chef/Johnson & Wales, Providence, RI Contact Info: Planetvenus@rocketmail.com /302-382-7479
www.tiffanykmusic.com Facebook: Tiffany K Edmonds Facebook Music Page: Tiffany K Music Twitter: @tiffanykmusic
Not every little girl gets to be the apple of her father's eye. The absence of his presence can cause emotional and mental scars that follow her into adulthood. Lack of his affirming words has the potential to alter her self esteem and value, often resulting in a desperate search through hurtful places simply to be validated. UNCLAIMED DIAMONDS is a heartfelt novel sharing intimate stories from women who've battled the heartache of absentee fathers and the journey it has taken them on. It also includes intimate stories from fathers who chose to be a permanent fixture in their daughters lives despite all obstacles. Available at www.radikalpublications.com
FINISH FIerce Sheila yvonne ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ Being diagnosed with Congestive Heart Failure due to complications from Stage 4 Blood Cancer and having emergency heart surgery during mid-terms of my Spring Semester of College.
~PASSION TO PURSUE~ My turning point was my personal relationship with GOD to be completely honest. I had to seek HIM daily- “BE JOYFUL IN HOPE, PATIENT IN AFFLICTION, FAITHFUL IN PRAYER” ROMANS 12: 12 HE sent me people to keep me encouraged in prayer and I grew closer in my personal relationship with GOD- I actually Praised my way through.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ March 2013 I repeated courses I couldn‘t finish because of my illness. I registered for Fall Semester courses and am currently finishing obtaining my degree (GOD is Awesome) My husband never allowed me to give up and my baby brother was my prayer warrior. September 2013 my book Skriptchures: The Demolition Crew was published. I gained a new outlook on life and I‘m closer with my family and friends. I‘m just in a peaceful place ..To GOD Be The Glory!!
T La'Shawna Hamilton ~ OBSTACLE IN 2013~ Getting my music in circulation to inspire the worldI released my single iCHOOSE LIFE in 2012 ~PASSION TO PURSUE~ Remembering God’s promise to me ~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ 3 category nominations for the 2014 Rhythm of Gospel Awards PRAISE & WORSHIP CD OF THE YEAR: iCHOOSE LIFE PRAISE & WORSHIP SONG OF THE YEAR: HE’S HERE BEST PERFORMANCE: by Praise & Worship Artist
Tinesar Forrest/President of Ty Enterprise, LLC
5 Things to Resolve NOT TO DO in 2014 It‘s the New Year and many of you will be making New Year Resolutions. That‘s great—and I hope you‘ll be successful. Along with what you will do in 2014, I‘d like you to resolve NOT to do some things. If you want to birth your dream in 2014 and you‘re serious about making this year bigger, better and bolder than 2013, there are some things you simply cannot do.
1.You Cannot Deny the Vision Within You. That nagging feeling that reminds you of work that needs to be done. A tugging at your heart when you see situations that cry out for your help. The business plan that was downloaded from your mind to a scratch piece of paper in 30 minutes flat. The ability to see the big picture when others wonder what you‘re looking at. Sound familiar? That‘s vision. Vision in its simplest form is defined as the ability to see. But your vision is different. Not only do you see that which is before you, you also see the things that are to come. It’s time you activate the vision and unleash your passion. And it starts by saying yes, I’ll do it. Once you say yes, the pathway to completion will become clear. 2. You
Cannot Underestimate the Power of You.
You are all of that and a bag of chips! If this was the 90‘s and we were watching the TV show In Living Color, I‘d have to give you two snaps in a circle! You have the innate ability to do the thing you were called to do. No, you may not have the degree or all of the experience that others have but there is something about you that
can‘t be described, duplicated or replicated. Own it. Embrace the special elements within you that allow you to operate effortlessly in your gifting. Think about the compliments you receive. Think about your strengths. Think about the joy you add to the world. That is the power of you. It’s time you fully recognized that power and used it as your “secret sauce” in your nonprofit or ministry.
3. You Cannot Undervalue the Power of Personal Development. I am an avid believer in growing me. Why? When I enhance my talents, skills and abilities, I always win. No one can ever take those things from me. The same holds true for you. What if you learned a second or third language—POW! How about finishing your degree--BOOM! And what if you took on new task at work to build your resume and earning power—BAM! Can you see the possibilities?! They are endless. That‘s how I achieved a lot of my professional success. Years ago I had a goal of becoming an executive director of a nonprofit. I figured out the areas I needed to grow in and made intentional plans to develop those areas. At times it meant volunteering to do work that wasn‘t part of my job description, doing work
Tinesar Forrest/President of Ty Enterprise, LLC 5. You Cannot Lose Your Faith that no one else wanted to do and so on. By improving me, I was prepared for the executive director position and I received it when the opportunity was presented. To this day, I continue my personal development by taking online classes, working with a business coach, attending seminars and reading books. And it‘s not all ―work‖ related. I also enjoy taking cooking classes to nurture my inner foodie Is there something you want to do better? Is there something you want to learn? Now is the time! Investing in you is one investment that will never decrease in value.
4. You Cannot Underestimate the Power of Teamwork There is something to be said about having someone on your team! When someone is on your team you are all working toward the same goal. You agree to do what is necessary to reach the desired results. In order to birth your business you need people who are willing to assist you. That means you give them permission to ask questions, provide advice, and advocate for you because you know the end result will be success. Despite the data reflecting the many benefits of teamwork some people just don‘t want to do it. They are still holding on to that one disastrous group project from way back in college (GET OVER IT!). Or they just don‘t want to be held accountable. (OUCH!) If you want to grow, it’s time to give teamwork and accountability a try. You can’t do it alone.
Having faith means you believe in the things you don‘t see. It is based on an expectation that you will receive those things in time. You have faith that you‘ll receive the promotion. You have faith that your daughter will keep her word. You have faith that you‘ll pass the exam. With faith, you are consciously putting out positive thoughts in support of what you want to happen. When launching a nonprofit or ministry you have to believe without a shadow of a doubt that it will happen. Trust that the same God that gave you the idea is also faithful to bring it to past. It’s time to replace fear with faith. Yes, you will have challenges but all of them can be overcome. Yes, you will get discouraged but that is only for a moment. Someone needs you to start that nonprofit. Someone needs you to minister into their lives. Someone is looking for you to stand up and be the answer they’ve been praying for. Don’t let fear rob you of that opportunity. Fear knocked at the door. Faith answered and no one was there. ~Anonymous
About the Author: Tinesar Forrest, MPA is a Speaker, Consultant and Nonprofit Enthusiast. She is also the President of Ty Enterprise, LLC , a consulting firm that specializes in providing capacity building supports for charitable nonprofits of all sizes. When your dream is mixed with Tinesar’s passion, creativity, and laser focus expect nothing less than success. Visit her at www.ty-enterprise.com
THROUGH THE STORM © Tamara Shirer The beginning is always so pleasant. Two people putting their best foot forward, showing what they have to offer. Their best features blossom as budding love is nurtured with, long walks, all night talks, passion, and a burning flame. As the season begins to change they shed their leaves and become bare. Now exposing all that‘s beneath the surface: fear, insecurity, doubt, and weakness. The flame grows dim, Turbulent storms draw near and wreaks havoc. As the devil never misses an opportunity to play on their vulnerability. Tearing apart the love that was built. The pattern of nature teaches them that a storm season always comes to pass. No matter how rough it is. Those without a strong foundation get wiped away & torn to shreds. Only the ones with strong roots in God remain standing. Beat down, torn, and broken But still standing. The seeds remain for the love to grow. Budding once more with stronger roots, planted deeper in God. The ones who remain standing learn & grow from the storm. Becoming better prepared and resilient. Knowing they cannot be torn apart.
Scripture – Matthew 7:25
Tamara Shirer Independent Beauty Consultant www.Marykay.com/Tshirer
FINISH FIerce Pam seldon ~Greatest OBSTACLE IN 2013~ My greatest obstacle was continuing after the lost of my mother in April. ~PASSION TO PURSUE~ The reason I kept pushing is because there are so many children in our state that go without. I did not want to sit around having a pity party when we have children without coats, shoes, underclothes and food. ~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ So far with me being obedient: I have clothed a child that had nothing, we have fed families for the holidays, we got children prepared for school and we were able to donate to a family that encountered a tragedy. I am also doing this as I am going through my own personal obstacles. God has me on this assignment and I will keep going no matter what.
, LISTENING TO GOD ABOUT MR. RIGHT -LYNETTE APPLING While I was in my time of rest, God allowed me the opportunity to experience my Boaz, my husband Jeffery Appling. He came from out of nowhere and provided many avenues of freedom that words cannot express. During my wait however, God prepared me for Jeff by studying and examining the book of Ruth. I hear women talk all the time about when their Boaz comes, not realizing the many principles needing to be in place before this can actually happen. Many women tend to stop at the financial realm of Boaz without grasping or comprehending the covenant relationship Boaz took upon himself. Prayerfully, together we can dissect the book of Ruth and help many women have rest during their wait. Now it came to pass in the days khasdjflksa when the judges ruled, that there was a famine in the land. And a certain man of Bethlehemjudah (House of Bread and Praise) went to sojourn in the country of Moab, he, and his wife, and his two sons. Famine! What a powerful word that deserves a deeper look. What is famine? According to Websterâ€˜s Dictionary famine is defined as having lack of food in a place; time of starving; a great lack; scarcity or shortage. Many women feel not having a man in their lives creates a deep void which creates a mind-set of being unloved and unwanted WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
Some women think a relationship with a man represents a place of refuge and holds a higher prominence or level of importance. In some cases women assume that all the good men are gone or taken. This is why a few women think there is a shortage or scarcity of quality, decent men. Other women suffer from emptiness, lack of validation, low self esteem. and are broken by the constant pressure from society to have a relationship. Thoughts of inadequacy and failure consume them to the point where they believe something must be wrong with their appearance, their personality or intellect. This perception is especially hard on single women with children. A number of single mothers believe theyâ€˜ve lost their chance at happiness because of having children. This again creates a perception of lack. Still other women have been taught that without a man, your life has less value in society than it should be. It is thought to be harder for a woman who has divorced, especially for those who have grown accustom to a certain lifestyle. All of these perceptions and lies have lead women down a horrible path of loneliness, emptiness, low self-esteem and a lack of validation. This in return creates a place of emotional and spiritual famine.
There are some married women who go through emotional and spiritual famine because of the choices they have made in marrying out of lack instead of love. Women who do not take the time to heal and wait upon the Lord rush into what they believe to be their last chance of having a companion. This creates a place of famine, because the woman has not allowed herself to be made whole. Thus she carries this pain into every relationship she is involved in. She searches for the nourishment of love while giving pieces of herself away to everyone who pays her a little attention. Without warning she realizes there is not much of her left. Now, not only is her heart in a place of famine, but her spirit, her soul and her flesh have evaporated to a place of total dehydration.
church days. Womenâ€˜s roles were to be silent and a dutiful housewife. Many of the women in my family still believe that finding a husband is the prize of a lifetime. Please understand I am not against getting married. I enjoy the godly relationship that I have with my husband. But I am grieved when the entire existence of some women is to find a husband. The interesting part of this verse says, in the days when judges ruled. Many of women today are living in the day when judges ruled. Peopleâ€˜s opinion about a single woman creates much of the torment that lays a foundation for the
, LISTENING TO GOD ABOUT MR. RIGHT I must be completely trans-parent during this passage. I was taught at a very young age that without marriage, there could be no happiness. My quest in life was to find a husband at any cost. One of the reasons this was taught to me was because this was taught to the women in my life. This lesson was the main teaching throughout my early WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
loneliness to begin. We allow the voices of the world and the incorrect teachings to judge our heart and our destiny. Because of the constant pressure from the judges in my life to appear to be something more and to have the American way of life, gave the enemy a foothold to move me into an emotional state of famine.
, LISTENING TO GOD ABOUT MR. RIGHT
Judges are the people who think they know but they have no idea of God‘s plans for you. They give advice and wisdom out of their own pain and expect the same destiny for you. Ladies, there is absolutely nothing wrong with being single. The Bible is clear on this. There is difference also between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman careth for the things of the Lord, that she may be holy both in body and in spirit: but she that is married careth for the things of the world, how she may please her husband (I Corinthians 7:34). I was taught that singleness was something horrible for a woman. But singleness gives every woman the great and wonderful opportunity to be holy in body and spirit. This is the precious time to completely bask and sit at the feet of Jesus. This time is priceless. When God was preparing me for my Boaz, He dated me and loved me. He taught me about true love. This love is the one I wrote about earlier. This is not a time to be wasted on what the judges of the land think or say. But it has been given for a total awakening of who you are as a woman and what your worth is to the King of all Kings. Do not take it lightly.
One of the reasons I wrote perceived famine is because that is what it is. Your place of loneliness is real. Your place of hurt is real. Your place of need is very real. But it is a choice. God said in His word in Deuteronomy 30:15 & 19-20 See, I have set before thee this day life and good, and death and evil… Let heaven and earth be my witnesses against you this day that I have put before you life and death, a blessing and a curse. So take life for yourselves and for your seed. In loving the Lord your God, hearing his voice and being true to him: for He is your life and by him will your days be long. Life with complete and total trust in God does not allow room for famine. For the life He gives comes out of loving the Lord, hearing His voice and being true to Him. When you make God the prize of your life instead of trying to find a husband, your days will be full of never ending life-giving water. The verse also said, And a certain man of Bethlehemjudah (House of Bread and Praise) went to sojourn in the country of Moab, he, and his wife, and his two sons. There are two key principles that women forget to do during their time of perceived famine and that is praise and eat the fresh bread provided. God desires for His word and His words to be our bread during our wait, but often we are so busy looking around the corner for the next relationship that we miss the freshness of the daily bread. We as women continuously gravitate towards the stale bread which often leads to our emptiness. What is our stale bread? Gossip, soap operas, superficial worship, living in the past, not being content in the moment, and perpetrating a victim mentality. More often then not, we believe the worst about our situation and allow others to dictate the patterns of our lives. When we come to the intimate place of lifestyle worship and unremitting, unrelenting, non-stop praise, we will then appreciate the preparation process of waiting. \ True praise releases a battle cry to the enemy. It is powerful. It torments the enemy because Satan doesn‘t understand why you can praise in the midst of your famine. Praise sends a message to the heavenlies and releases the glory of heaven on your behalf. It is not to be taken half heartily. It is a war cry. A sound created by the instrument of your mouth.
And the name of the man was Elimelech, and the name of his wife Naomi, and the name of his two sons Mahlon and Chilion, Ephrathites of Bethlehemjudah. And they came into the country of Moab, and continued there. This particular verse is interesting. In doing a word search in Strongs, I came across the meaning of each person‘s name and received tremendous insight as to what God wanted me to write. Elimelech means My God is King. I need to stop right here and expand. When women begin to realize that God is King in and of their lives, they will not be content with anyone who will abuse them, mistreat them or strip them of their true identity. The catch to the phrase is ―My” God is King. Make it personal. Take ownership of this wonderful aspect of God‘s character. He is yours! You don‘t have to worry about what time He will be home, because He is always with you. Excuses are not part of God‘s vocabulary. So you don‘t have to wait for an explanation of where He was. He‘s always on time. The word My identifies the level of intimacy you can obtain with Christ. My Personal Savior. My Redeemer. My Everlasting Father. My Source. My Restorer. My Jehovah. My Peacemaker. My Stone of Israel. My Manna. My Star. My Scepter. My Light of the Morning. My Lifter of My Head. My Fortress. My Rock. My Shepherd. My Strong and High Tower. My Rose of Sharon. My Friend That Sticks Closer Than Any Brother. My Lily of the Valley. My Sanctuary. My Prince of Peace. My Mighty God. My Counselor. My Rock of Ages. My Hiding Place From The Wind. My Tried Stone. My Maker. My Portion. My Physician. My Resting Place. My Wall of Fire. My Ancient of Days. My Prince of Princes. My Ruler. My Stronghold. My Purifier.
My Refiner. My Emmanuel. My Master. My Jesus. My Christ. When I think about Jesus in every dimension He is, it becomes personal. Glory be to His name! Now let me take you to a whole new level. The man God has for you will always take you to the throne room. You will never have to remind him of who you are for he will know you are a daughter of God the King. God tremendously anoints the type of man who understands who he is in the kingdom while uplifting his wife. For his allegiance is to God not to the world. This calls for a truer level of love only given by God. Mahlon is the husband of Ruth and his name means sick. Some of us women get caught up trying to save sick men. We think we can manipulate the Holy Spirit and change a man. We speak in tongues, fast and pray trying to receive some form of blessing upon the mess we just created. Why are we so desperate that we accept any old thing into our spirit, into our lives and into our souls? Sick men! Ungodly men who blame you for their demise. Men who believe you are to take care of them. Sick men! For some reason a lot of women are attracted to this type of man. ―But I can change him.‖ It is not our responsibility to change a man. We were not created to take the place of the Holy Spirit. ―You really don‘t understand.‖ Understanding is not a prerequisite for foolishness. ―I‘ve been alone for so long.‖ This usually means ―I don‘t think anyone will love me like him.‖ Another misconception is that love is magical. Love is the epitome of God‘s character. Only God can give love in the confines of what a woman desires and needs. And only God can manifest this on earth through another person. ―This is all I can get.‖ Love is not for getting purposes. It is a gift that is freely given in spite of our current status, circumstance or behavior. , LISTENING TO GOD ABOUT MR. RIGHT
FINISH FIerce LORA FAISON
~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ Raising 3 children as a single mother while dealing with Lupus, working a full time job and trying to design a clothing line after many failed attempts. ~PASSION TO PURSUE~ Instead of being engulfed by many failed attempts and let downs by people, I decided to go to GOD and allow Him to show me who I should seek and what my next step should be. I remember people telling me, “No matter what you have been through, you can't get help if you don't ask.” ~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ Because of my obedience, I will be finally debuting the first Origin by Faison collection in February of 2014.
Origin By Faison (The Birth Of A New Line) Lora Faison 302-547-8769 email@example.com
FINISH FIerce CLARA’S GIFTS Reason for Clara’s Gifts
Temeca white ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ My greatest obstacle to date is accepting that I won‘t be able to help everyone I see when we go out. I have a tendency to only see who hasn‘t gotten fed or who didn‘t get clothing, shoes or a blanket. My step-dad reminds me that there will always be more need than we‘ll ever be able to satisfy. My new motto is, “We can’t do it all; but we can do better!” To try to do & be better each year, month & outreach, is the desired outcome.
~PASSION TO PURSUE~ There is so much need in our communities for assistance. My turning point was when I settled in my spirit that if I ever have to do the entire outreach day by myself, that I would. That‘s when I started thinking & planning bigger & long term.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ When I asked God back in January 2013 what I needed to do for a project for MLK Day of Service, He told me to feed the hungry. By being obedient I‘ve been able to help hundreds of people in the community this year & plan on making it thousands next year with His help.
Tanisha Anthony ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ My greatest obstacle in 2013 was trying to keep my clients motivated to complete the entire process. The program I coach is 12 weeks. For some people that’s a long time. For some, it was a breeze. Each person is different, comes with different goals, expectations and drive. There were some that did an amazing job following through and just happened to lose anywhere from 25-35 lbs and also matching the loss in inches. AMAZING! Some clients, for several reasons, some unknown, did not finish. I want to plant a seed. Water it. Nurture it. Give them a new nutritional foundation. Encourage their socks off to get in the gym to lose, build, tighten and strengthen. This process is twofold. It’s a challenge and lifestyle change. One of my favorite sayings is, “If it doesn’t challenge you, it doesn’t change you.”
FINISH FIerce ~PASSION TO PURSUE~ Turning points for me was when I received a text from a client that said, “Week 5: Blasted a total of 20 pounds & over 15 inches” or in my Sept session one of my clients “was” a Type II Diabetic. When she started Live The Lifestyle she was on insulin twice a day and a pill. Seven weeks into the program she sent me a text that read, “I am getting healthier blood sugar/A1C levels down and NO MORE DIABETES MEDICATIONS for ME!” Is that not incredible that her doctor took her off her meds?! My mouth dropped. I was super excited for her. Wow/Amen/Go God! Like I declare, your healing is not in your medicine cabinet, it’s in your kitchen. Changing the way you eat and you can literally change your life. Being able to witness it by being part of it sparked a new level of excitement and dedication to my clients. Illness is way too prevalent. The weight management/health coach community can and will make a difference.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ Because of my obedience I reached so many people. You gotta LOVE the silent watchers. Most times they don’t say a word, they just watch. I’ll get a random private message or a comment that some I posted helped them. That they adopted some of the best practices I shared. That is one of the most rewarding feelings. Some friends you know are trying to change their habits/lifestyle, but when it’s the ones that don’t post it or talk about it, that’s when I know all my posting and talking and sharing is not in vain.
In my new book, I Didn‘t Know– Identifying, Confronting, and Overcoming Child Sexual Abuse I expose the enemy for who he really is; a deceitful, cunning thief who will terrorize you to death if you allow him to. Many victims of child sexual abuse do not come forward because of the guilt and shame; these are lies from the enemy. The enemy knows how to taunt us into feeling guilty and ashamed, as if we bought this on ourselves. No one has the right to violate us and take (steal) our most prized possession (our bodies). Website: www.yvetteallentatum.com Facebook: www.facebook.com/yvettetatum Twitter: www. Twitter.com/loosed03 YouTube: www.youtube.com/user/loosed03
Norissa G. Howard is a newly-published author, that explores her creativity in "A Princess Day.― This 8yr old raises her own awareness on the topic of bullying, from the viewpoint of a 'princess.' This book is recommended for your young daughters, as it guides them in how to address a bully and how to keep from being one. It will give your 'young princesses' a voice and remind them of their self-worth.
"A Princess Day" is Book 1 of the NoriGrace Princess Series, released Nov, 2013. Available www.norigrace.com Contact: firstname.lastname@example.org 302-250-0126
FINISH FIerce Melissa Hightower ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ Separated in marriage and left to care for 4 children while trying to seek employment.
~PASSION TO PURSUE~ I knew I could not give up for myself or my children.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ Through drawing closer to God, I was able to gain employment (inadvertently an opportunity to minister to other youth not to give up in their circumstances). I went back to college full-time. I was able to send my son to College Preparatory School with tuition paid in full. I was able to send my daughter, an elite athlete, to the Junior Olympics and was also able to take my children on an all inclusive trip to Disneyland.
Melissa Hightower email@example.com 1-609-724-4310
FINISH FIerce Nicole McIntosh ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ My greatest obstacle is overcoming a domestically violent marriage and getting my life back on track. It taught me tolerate less and to love myself enough to get out of situations that aren't healthy for me and my children.
~PASSION TO PURSUE~ The turning point and reason I kept pursuing are my children. They look up to me and watch everything I do. My parents weren't in my life and I want my kids to have the opportunity to have someone they can talk to, get advice from, love them and be there for them when they need someone to be. After losing my daughters dad I had come to the realization I need to work harder to lose more weight. I need to be around for my children Iâ€˜m all they have to depend on. So they make me want to strive for bigger accomplishments.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ Because of my obedience I've accomplished being a part of a company that is providing me the opportunity to model and show the world who I am. I have a lot of supporters behind me and that motivates me to keep doing what I am doing. I venture out alone and that has been a blessing because I have met so many wonderful people across the world even celebrities. When you are a humble person the world tends to gravitate towards you. I want to let people know that they can do whatever it is that they put their mind to do. Don't let anyone tell you that you cant.
SHARP EDGES: Learning to LOVE AGAIN after painful relationships…
Him… How can we be vulnerable in a relationship and be present without holding our significant other accountable for past hang-ups? And it starts again… you see things coming out. Things coming out that begin to remind you of the past. It does not burn you enough to make your blood boil, but it creates a tension within that makes your skin itch. You begin to see the little things that us men do, that you saw your last ex do. The one or two things you can‘t stand. No matter how quirky or disrespectful it may be, you see us doing these things and it immediately makes you question whether you could (or should) allow yourself to be vulnerable, when there are things that have hurt you from the past beginning to rear there ugly heads and reveal themselves in the present. He‘s not making you a main priority. You catch him glancing at other women. You notice he struggles to make eye contact with you. He is too smothering. He relies too much on his mother. He lies about things. He has a numerous amount of female friends. Why does he do these things? Has he no respect for you? Does he not realize you know he is doing these things? If he cares for you, would he not KNOW that you dislike it when he does these things?? …you know what? …He may NOT know. Especially if you do not tell him. He should ALREADY know. Right? Shirelle ―Diamond‖ Hogans & Dennis Spence
Well…yes, but that is a far assumption to make. An assumption that could set you up for failure if you continuously make it. Not all men are the same, nor have been raised the same, nor encountered the same type of situations with the same type of people. Does it sound a little farfetched? Yes, but you still must recognize it.
SHARP EDGES: Learning to LOVE AGAIN after painful relationships…
Him…continued ―My people are destroyed for their lack of knowledge…‖ excerpt from Hosea 4:6 I believe communication is so crucial in all things now of days. Especially for the passing of knowledge. Knowing the person you are with is important when wanting to share time, yourself, your love, even your future with them. So how do we reveal ourselves in the midst of a clash between insecurities and egos? Consider an onion... Through numerous layers upon layers, you can find your way into its heart, one layer at a time. A slow process that allows one to accept each layer as it is, or reject it. If you give an entire "onion" of emotion and past hurts and feelings, it could possibly be overwhelming.
Her… How can I hold back all of me, when all of me is required at every encounter. My complexity often identifies me and at any given moment we are just going to have to deal with it all. I‘m not trying to be too much. My fear, or is it anxiety, is that I‘m not enough for you. That my insecurities will out shine my assets. That you won‘t stay long enough to see the most beautiful part of me., my heart. I just want to feel safe with you. Let my guard down long enough to fully hear all that you are saying instead of listening for inconsistencies. I want to be free to make mistakes and not feel like I have to walk on egg shells to be perfect. I don‘t want to be tough and on guard all the time. I want to trust. I want to learn and experience what love really is, not the façade that I conjured in my mind based on all of the wrong relationships I‘ve been in. I don‘t need you to complete me,. I want you to cherish me. If I give you my heart, I hope you handle it with care. It‘s been bruised and mishandled so many times before. My anxiety taunts me and I‘m trying to not let it destroy what we‘re trying to build. Be patient with me, my heart is fragile but open for the possibilities of you and I living happily… WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
Shirelle ―Diamond‖ Hogans & Dennis Spence
FINISH FIerce Carolyn White- Washington ~GREATEST OBSTACLE IN 2013~ My greatest obstacle was turning my dream into a reality. My vision was clearly to empower women and girls while providing them with sisterhood support, valuable resources and direct services, The greatest obstacle was to secure volunteer professionals who were dedicated to helping Women and Girls turn their impossibilities into realities.
~PASSION TO PURSUE~ My greatest obstacle was turning my dream into a reality. My vision was clearly to empower women and girls while providing them with sisterhood support, valuable resources and direct services, The greatest obstacle was to secure volunteer professionals who were dedicated to helping Women and Girls turn their impossibilities into realities.
~FINISHED FIERCE FRUIT~ Because of my obedience coupled along with an amazing staff of volunteers we have hosted more than 300 empowerment workshops, impacted more than 40,000 women and girls ,provided food for more than 1,000 families during Hope for Holiday and over 1200 New Coats to Women and Children in need. Because of my obedience to press in we have developed 5 Sisters Signature Services. These include: 1- SOS/Saving our Sisters from HIV-AIDS 2. Daughters of Destiny-Mentoring Outreach 3. LOVE-Leave Out Violence Everyday- Domestic & Sexual Violence Awareness 4. The Empowerment Cafe- Personal and Professional Development 5. The Harriet Tubman Project- Mentors and supports Women in Homeless Shelters.
www.sisters4sisters.com | Sisters4sisters@aol.com
FEAR NOT © Tamara Shirer Why would I bring you this far only to leave you… stumbling as a lost traveler in the depths of the wilderness? I have given you vision to see the promise I have placed before you.. But the path you cannot see to get there, must be led by me. FEAR NOT! Humble yourself and ease your doubt.. Because you are only a vessel used to carry out a Divine Plan that is not about you.. but about blessing those who surround you. So, since this was not your plan to begin with, you are released from the burden of figuring out how to manifest it.. FEAR NOT! You are only asked to be obedient, to walk by faith and not by the sight of despair, or limited thinking of the world you live in. Know that He who created you, along with the heavens and the earth, is quite capable of creating the path that will lead you into ALL that you are destined for… FEAR NOT! Scripture – Joshua 1:9
Tamara Shirer Independent Beauty Consultant www.Marykay.com/Tshirer WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
Are you enslaved by your circumstance? Is something holding you back from achieving your life goals? In a world This author compares Apostle Paul's journey on a ship with where ―Reality‖ her life to help readers understand that life does not have to shows have become be perfect for you to be successful. She assembles a a platform of how life simple recipe using Broken Pieces to help you on should be, the essence of your journey. The recipe includes: A large marriage is lost in scripted portion of Spiritual Foundation, A dash of drama, cat fights, infidelity wars Faith, Heavy portions of Love, and lack of self respect for ones spouse Strength, and Prayer and all for the sake of ratings. Diamond posed Sprinklings of Positive Attitude the questions: I made it on Broken Pieces, Does anyone take marriage seriously anymore? using these ingredHave women become so independent ients. I believe you that they don’t need a husband? can too! Do women value and respect men Delores R. Garvin,PhD as providers & protectors anymore? Author, Pastor, Chaplain, The negativity displayed in today‘s AVAILABLE AT: society doesn‘t uphold the values or www.amazon.com characteristics of a woman let alone firstname.lastname@example.org a wife. Nor does the façade of a ―perfect‖ marriage exist Bianca without trials and tribuRenee As little girls, we all lations and most of all James, dreamed of one day being WORK. most sought after married, but with a rapid therapist and mother of two increasing rate of broken homes, had unknowingly allowed single parenting, same sex-marriages herself to become vulnerable to a and divorces, who prepares the little man that she felt had managed to break girl in all of us to be a wife? down the barriers that she had established in her quest to protect her heart. Bianca James was now faced with needing Discover how to be a woman someone to help her, where she committed to the covenant , Purchase had always helped and cared for those your copy at : around her. She now needed answers and www.radikalpublications.com advice, comforting and understanding, from someone that would aid her in processing what was now one of the biggest dilemmas in her life. $15.99 Contact info: email@example.com www.bookstore.xlibris.com www.amazon.com www.barnesandnoble.com
In today's world things happen so unexpectedly it's important for you to always bring your fashion A game. That doesn't just mean being dressed for the occasion but, being versatile. Yes, I said it ladies, versatility is key in helping you adapt to whatever the evening throws you way and remaining the sexy bomb shell you were when you stepped out of the house that morning. Whether it's going from work to a happy hour or an afternoon brunch turns into a club night you will always be prepared.
Michael Hill Image Consultant | MIZ INK LLC (302) 762-2508 | mizink.weebly.com
Here's where the fun comes in when going to a after work happy hour being able to transform your work outfit to evening wear is vital to keeping that sexy bomb shell image. It's as simple as taking off the blazer and showing some skin even a little cleavage. Simple things like adding a sexy necklace and matching earrings will give you that I'm grown and sexy look your after. When you walk in all eyes will be on you and yes ladies you've done it again. Good luck and remember always bring you fashion A game.
Using this stylish yet subtle outfit an easy way to make it work appropriate would be adding a blazer which adds class while the color show style and confidence. The pencil skirt compliments your figure and gives you great lines. While those shoes demand you be taken seriously with a soft sex appeal. Paired with a soft belt to match no buckle your outfit is complete. WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
As the thermometer drops, the number of layers increase; the disproportionate relationship try's its very best to destroy any hope of you feeling your sexiest as you struggle to fend off the chill. So as the leaves on the tree's fall and decompose into the icy cold earth, how do you evolve your style to be weather-appropriate and yet head-turningly appealing?
Of course it's not about being a super sexy mamma 24/7, that goes without saying; nor does showing skin necessarily equate to being sexy. Nevertheless on those cold nights when your hitting the town and want to push the envelope, to find some ways to show off your sexy body without becoming a frozen popsicle in the process, these are a few.
Michael Hill Image Consultant | MIZ INK LLC (302) 762-2508 | mizink.weebly.com
MINE, YOURS AND OURS: MAKING BLENDED FAMILIES WORK By Yvette L. Allen-Tatum The family structure has strayed from the ―norm‖ or times past. In this generation ―average‖ families are more likely blended. One often associates the blended family structure in a negative manner. What if their kid doesn‘t like me for valid or invalid reasons? How do I handle communicating with my spouse about their child‘s behavior? How much is too much influence from the outside parent? What if my spouse plays favorites with discipline/rewarding? The question that is often left unentertained is, what are the benefits of blended family? Yvette, author, speaker and advocate for sexual abuse awareness shares with iMATTER Magazine her experiences and proven solutions …. There are three keys to successful family time: Be consistent – have family time the same time What causes blended families? Blended families are created for many reasons: every time. For example, every Thursday evening at 7pm. 1. Death 2. Divorce Everyone must participate in family time. It may be 3. Single – never married a struggle in the beginning, but it yields great What are the keys to success in dividends in the end.
making blended families work? Regardless of how these families are put together in order for them to survive ―work‖ has to be put in my ALL family members. Having experienced and still experiencing a blended family myself, the key to ―success‖ or ―survival‖ is to remove ALL ―AMBIGUITY.‖ Dictionary.com defines ―ambiguity‖ in this manner:
Family time should always be at home – this is the place where everyone lives. The home is the sanctuary; build better relationships at home you‘ll have better relationships everywhere else. Everyone in the family needs to know and feel that they are a part of the family; this is what you will accomplish with family time.
How should I enter a blended family Doubtfulness or uncertainty of meaning or situation? The best way to enter a blended family situation is intention An unclear, indefinite, or equivocal word, to put ALL your cards on the table prior to going into the situation. Hopefully, some of this was expression, meaning, etc. covered when you entered the relationship with Another key to success in the blended family your significant other and has been talked about is to set aside or establish official ―family more as your grow closer. time.‖ Family time is the when ―ALL‖ members of the family get together for FUN!! Above all, be open and honest. Also, understand Family time can consist of a variety of games, that compromise or the willingness to compromise is a great bargaining or negotiating piece. You have activities, food, etc. to be willing to give on some issues in order to get on others. Stay true to your values and be committed.
MINE, YOURS AND OURS: MAKING BLENDED FAMILIES WORK By Yvette L. Allen-Tatum How do I manage family conflict? Specifically, how do we discipline and/or correct the children? Managing conflict in blended families can be extremely challenging, at best. The key to achieving optimal results is to display a united front before the children. The parents cannot allow the children/teenagers to witness any form of division between them because the children will play on these weaknesses and divide the parents even further apart. In situations where you and your spouse cannot agree to how to resolve a conflict; at least agree to a minimum criteria. The minimum criteria could consist of, for example, the two of you together sitting down with the child or children: Each explaining what was wrong vs. what was right in the situation Formally stating what the form of discipline will/shall be Here‘s where it gets tricky. Take turns speaking to the points you agree on; this displays your united front. The points you do not agree on, appropriate discipline for example, let each parent address his or her child directly, yet the two of you still do it together. Again, this presents a united front to the children. All the children need to understand that the two of you have now become one and that together you ALL are now FAMILY. In addition, each parent should provide their child with an open invitation to come speak with the parent directly. This provides assurance to the child that he/she still has the parents ―ear.‖
Family conflict example: Social Media: Suppose one child post negative comments about his/her respective stepparent on Facebook and/or Twitter? In my opinion, this is a go hard or go home conflict and it cannot be taken lightly. I do not care what age the child is, here‘s my response: • •
Computer privileges should be suspended – you determine the period of time ALL social media accounts should be shut down – terminated • Punishment should fit the crime Prior to suspending computer privileges a public apology/statement should be made on all social media accounts Sentences – the child/teenager should write 200 sentences: ―I will not post negative comments on Facebook or Twitter about my stepfather or stepmother.‖
In life, we have a tendency to think things just have a way of working out; this is so untrue. Life happens and it will continue to happen whether we participate in it or not. Therefore we have to LIVE LIFE ON PURPOSE! As such, we have to intentionally make things happen for us and our families.
MINE, YOURS AND OURS: MAKING BLENDED FAMILIES WORK By Yvette L. Allen-Tatum Is it wrong to go snooping in your child's room? First it's your child, I don't care how old or young has a room in your house; it's your room!! Therefore you are not snooping.
Second no, it's not wrong, again it's your room. The real questions are: 1) how do you handle things if you do find what you were looking for? 2) how do you handle things if you find more than you were looking for?
Suppose it's your stepchild? Same rules apply! Just make sure you check the room out with the other parent present; otherwise you might have a problem on your hands. What’s your personal experience with blended family parenting? Give us your feedback about the article at : iMATTER@radikalpublications.com
DIAMOND EXPOSED!!! Website: http://www.yvetteallentatum.com Facebook: http://facebook.com/yvette.tatum Twitter: http://twitter.com/loosed03 YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/user/loosed03
Diamond confesses her most intimate secrets, hang-ups & life challenges that almost cost her the happiness she desired. Discover how the pressures of life were manipulated to reveal a ―DIAMOND IN THE ROUGH‖. Available at: ww.radikalpublications.com and on Kindle at www.amazon.com 61
Polar opposites: layering heavy with light. Throwing a heavy coat over any short little nothing is the party girlâ€˜s go-to process in winter. That much we know. Nevertheless each new season brings freshly trending ways of interpreting this winter ritual, and for this winter itâ€˜s all about maximum contrast.
Michael Hill Image Consultant | MIZ INK LLC (302) 897-7754 | mizink.weebly.com
Sheer dresses and heavy coats: Look for slips in satin or abstracted lace, paired with coats in leather, fur, or plaid. My suggestion would be adding fishnets and boots. You can also smarten the look up with a pair of pumps.
MIZ INK's FASHION TIP : Versatility... When putting together a outfit always remember versatility. This means being able to transform your professional attire to evening wear without having to waste your valuable time . So whether it's going from the office to happy hour or brunch to dinner date, VERSATILITY will help you save time, money and also help you relax and stay fly.
Michael Hill Image Consultant MIZ INK LLC ((302) 897-7754
2014 WINTER ISSUE WWW.RADIKALPUBLICATIONS.COM
iMATTER MAGAZINE is a quarterly publication designed to emPOWER women form the inside out. Fashion & Beauty | Love & Relationships | Recip...
Published on Feb 13, 2014
iMATTER MAGAZINE is a quarterly publication designed to emPOWER women form the inside out. Fashion & Beauty | Love & Relationships | Recip...